I Love Dick (2016) s01e01 Episode Script

1 WOMAN: I'm just saying, we gotta be out of here in, like in, like, four hours tops.
I'm not holding you back.
Where's the copy of "Sisyphus"? Babe, you're bringing too many books.
The institute has a library, right? - (KNOCKING) - Oh, shit, that's her.
Uh Okay, that's - Oh.
- The girl, the girl.
- Will you get the door? - The subletter.
- Okay, just Hey.
- Hi.
We're literally leaving this afternoon.
- Oh, yeah, yeah.
- It's usually not like this.
- Oh.
- Silvert.
This is, uh, uh - Hi, Silvert.
- What? Hi.
Please tell me your name again.
- Esther.
- Esther, Esther, Esther.
- Esther, hi.
- Nice to meet you.
- Esther.
- Wow, you guys.
- Yeah, this is the bedroom.
- Esther.
Esther Williams.
Oh, yeah, this is my office.
- Wow.
You guys are going to - I'm sorry.
Marfa? - Yeah, Marfa Marfa, Texas.
- Oh, cool.
Wow.
Yeah, there's a this institute started by this guy, Dick Jarrett.
People get invited to read and write and think.
My husband, Silvert, he's got a residency there, so, uh, I'm gonna just drop him off, and then I'm gonna go straight to Venice, Italy.
- Wow.
- 'Cause I've got a a film in the in the festival there.
- Wow.
Congratulations.
- Which is really exciting, yeah.
- That's huge.
- So, yeah.
You know, in Venice, I'm gonna do one of those gondolas.
- Oh, sure.
You've got to.
- Right? Yeah.
I mean, you haven't been there if you don't do it.
I mean, there really is nothing sadder than a single rider on a gondola.
No, that's You can't look at it like that.
- Why? - It's how you get around.
It's a mode of transportation.
It's like an Uber.
Okay.
Don't let me eat anymore.
I won't.
Put 'em away.
- Here, let me have one more bite - No.
- And then I won't have any - No! Oh, come on.
You know what I want to do when we get to Tennessee.
I want to go to Dollywood.
We're not stopping anywhere in Tennessee.
Oh, you know what? I just I just remembered.
They have a rule that you're not allowed in unless you have enormous tits.
(SARCASTIC LAUGH) So you'll have to wait in the car.
Look, look, look! My darlin', we made it to motherfuckin' Marfa.
Is it weird that this is not at all what I expected? (WOMAN SINGING IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE) (BIRDS CHIRPING) - - (WOMAN SPEAKING FOREIGN LANGUAGE) Yeah, it's like your fuckin' Amish.
It sucks.
(GRUNTS) Hey, honey! Did you pack thelapsang souchong tea? - What the fuck? - What? Motherfuckin' Venice said they're pullin' the film.
Why? I mean, over You know, it's over the rights to that fuckin' song.
Do you remember that stupid fuckin' bossa nova klezmer smash that I used? - Mm-hm.
- That I I fuckin' I fuckin' pulled that shit from obscurity! I was gonna give those dipshits publicity, and they're Where's the mail bag? Where's that mail bag? Those assholes.
They must You know what? They must They must have CC'd the festival on that cease and desist letter.
'Cause it fuckin' went right to the festival.
You got sent a cease and desist letter from the song people and you used the song anyway? Really? - What? - Fuck you! - That's nice.
- Very unhelpful! You're gonna take You're gonna take their fuckin' side on this! Why don't you just go back to New York, and re-master the film? - Okay? - The post house is holding it hostage.
They've got the fuckin' master, because I couldn't afford to pay for the bullshit sound mix.
- Right.
- This is like you don't even listen, you don't even give a shit.
- (INDISTINCT DIALOG) - (TRAIN WHISTLE BLOWING) - - (WOMAN SINGING IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE) (PANTING) (WOMAN CONTINUES SINGING) Hey! Hi.
Mornin'.
- Really windy out there, I was just - Yeah, I know.
I don't usually Well, wake up in the morning and But you just shouldn't smoke anywhere outside.
Presidio County Sheriff's Department not fuckin' cool with that, okay? They don't like the artists.
It's no joke.
Great, okay.
I'm not a wake and baker, I just Today I woke and wanted to smoke.
I got some shitty news.
Hey, I'm Chris.
Sorry.
I, um Hi.
- Devon.
- Devon.
Living, uh, right over there, so Next door.
Yeah, I know who you are.
You're Dick's new fellow's wife.
I work for the institute so I take care of everything around here.
- Oh, great.
- So if you need anything fixed or whatever, you know, handy dandy Mandy.
Oh, so you're like You are actually the person that I should be speaking with.
The, uh, fridge is not working over there, and neither is the the stove.
Oh, yeah.
I just didn't know you guys were comin' in so soon.
I didn't get a chance But, I'll get to it.
Sit down.
Make yourself at home.
Have a seat.
(EXHALES) Oof.
Oh.
The shoes are cute.
Uh, they're real bright but they ain't right.
Uh, you got some boots? You know, 'cause we got rattlers.
And scorpions.
What size are you? - Eight and a half? - Yeah.
Well, how long you lived in Marfa? Oh, I've been here my whole life.
- Really? - My family's been here forever, you know, my great grandparents came here in 1910.
Deep roots.
Yeah.
Here.
Those'll do ya.
This is an honest to God cowboy boot.
Oh, hell, yeah.
I'll get 'em back to you, but it's not gonna be long.
Don't sweat it.
Whenever.
You know, I'm around, you're around.
Oh, I had some plans and then they just kind of, um Things kind of whoosh.
Yeah? Shit's disappointing, huh? Ugh, I so do not want to go to this reception.
Just, like, an hour, okay? I gotcha, baby.
(INDISTINCT CHATTER) I think I see Dick.
So why don't you fetch us some wine.
Okay, not long, please.
(INDISTINCT CHATTER) Hi.
- Hi.
- Hi.
I'm I'm Sookie.
This is Jeff.
- I'm Chris.
Hi.
- Oh.
Hello, Chris.
Join the party.
What are you doing here? My husband has a a residency.
- He's one of Dick's new fellows.
- He's Dick's new fellow.
- Yeah.
- Nice.
I guess he is Dick's new fellow.
- Oh.
- Have you met Dick yet? No, I have not met Dick yet.
Oh, there he is.
Look right over there.
Right over there.
Have you read his book? His writing seminar has a two year waiting list, been on it for three years.
Dick's fellows don't usually bring wives/partners.
Yeah, I'm not staying.
I'm just dropping him off.
Yeah, it's just that the whole point of the residency is for the solitude, so there wouldn't be a distraction.
You know, there are places in Japan where, uh, you know, if you sit barefoot in the pool, and, uh, the koi, they just will just nibble at your calluses.
Yeah, they have those in Bali, too.
- Oh, yeah? - Yeah.
You ever been to Bali? - Nope.
- It's beautiful.
- Yeah? - You should Yeah, I mean you should go.
I mean, seriously, it's gorgeous.
I find too much beauty, um anxiety provoking.
(CHUCKLES) Oh, no.
What are you doing in town, anyway? Um, I came here to write.
I'm re-interpreting the Holocaust.
There's something new afoot.
There's something afoot with the Holocaust? - There's something new afoot.
- Something new afoot.
- And I'm gonna You know, I'm gonna find it.
- Okay.
If you're gonna spend that much time thinking about the Holocaust, you must be pretty okay with melancholy, huh? I don't feel that melancholy.
You know, it's funny, when I was a girl, I always thought it was called I thought you had to say it, uh, "melan-cholie.
" - (CHUCKLES) - You kind of look "melan-cholie.
" - Yeah? - Yeah, your face.
- Yeah? - There's something kind of ruined about it.
I mean, in an interesting way.
(CHUCKLES) MAN 1: So imagine you're outside, you're laying on the ground, and all of a sudden every light goes off and the sky just comes on.
There's Marfa realness.
There Marfa "realness," and then there's "Marfa realness.
" MAN 2: Fracked water can never be consumed by humans ever again.
MAN 3: tryin' to franchise the deal somewhere else with a stamped, certified nitro oxygenated copy on it.
That's the deal.
- Wow.
- So that's what's happening today.
WOMAN: And, I mean, that wasn't nearly as bad as the art opening.
Just one bad group show with filled with men.
And terrible painters.
WOMAN: Tons.
Are you kidding? I heard the Q&A was quite lively.
MAN: Yeah, Eileen was not happy.
You're the Holocaust scholar wife.
Let's hope he doesn't bring the work home, huh? - Uh-huh.
- My wife complains to me all the time about how I'm obsessed with models of poverty.
- Oh, right, right.
- You two should have lunch.
Where is she? Gretchen.
Gretchen.
It's the Holocaust wife.
- Gretchen.
- GRETCHEN: Stop saying that.
(LAUGHING) - Well, tell her about the - So nice to meet you.
- Excuse me.
- Sorry.
She's gotta tell you about the the Zumba classes.
CHRIS: Dear Dick Hi.
I'm Chris Crouse.
Well, hello, Chris Crouse.
- Hi.
Dick, right? - That's me.
Love love that you just go by Dick, because usually, someone would You know, if one is born a Richard, they would Rich, Rick, Richie, Ricky.
- There's so many - Just Dick.
Yes.
Is it possible that I saw you on a horse yesterday? Yeah, I have a ranch just outside of town.
Oh.
How how big? - Curious.
- You want to know how big my ranch is? (CHUCKLES) No more polite to ask a rancher the size of his acreage than to ask a lady her age.
I'm s straddling 40-ish.
Straddling? Uh Uh, we're we just arrived.
I'm here with my husband.
Um, Silvert, he's your fellow.
Oh.
Um, can you recommend a good place for dinner? I like The Rope and Loin.
Oh.
We would love to take you out, uh, to dinner.
Silvert and I, we would love to just It'd be good for you guys to spend some 8:00? See you there.
MAN: Dave.
Dave, Dave.
Dave, Dave.
Hey, you gotta here who Art Malone hired as curator.
- - (WOMAN SINGING IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE) So, is that what you're wearing, babe? Yes, it is.
I wonder if this is gonna be a too sack dress.
A little too Mennonite, maybe.
Can I borrow one of your T-shirts? Maybe I can do, like, a Patty Smith.
Yes, of course.
Whatever works.
Maybe I could put it underneath a blazer and wear some skinny jeans.
- Okay.
- But I feel like denim is not gonna be my friend.
Turning off lights now.
(SIGHS) Are you gettin' close? How we doin'? Great.
Let's go.
Hm, good? Go? - Got your keys.
- I'm sorry.
There used to be a time where this would - I'm - I mean, yes, you look great.
I mean, you don't you don't want to Of course, but we're under, you know - Okay.
- A time limit.
If we didn't have to be somewhere, I would throw you down, and we would just fuck.
You don't have to be, like, weird about it.
I'm just saying let's we could just like Let's just do it.
I swear.
Let's do it.
No, I thought it would be It's Now I'm like I have an idea.
Oh, the voice drops.
- It's okay.
- No, listen It's not like you have to do that.
- Get on your knees.
- No, I'm not gonna get on my knees.
You do that, I'll finish you off in there.
(KEYS JANGLING) So you don't want to Let's just be very clear.
You know? You want to keep this drought going.
I was willing to break it, but you're the one.
Just so we're clear.
It's not like a fight.
(GROANS) I think we should just go to dinner.
Okay, great.
CHRIS: Dear Dick - Hello.
- Hi.
- Hi.
- Found it.
- Yes.
- At long last.
- The only one.
- (CHUCKLES) Oh, thank you.
Wow, see, this is, uh, a real a real gentleman.
Don't you dare yank this out, and make me fall on my ass.
- (CHUCKLES) - I'm sorry? That's just a dumb joke.
Oh, wow.
Here we go.
They only have a tasting menu tonight.
Hope you're okay with rabbit.
Oh, great, I love rabbit.
I'm a big game eater.
I've never seen her eat game in my life.
I'm not I'm not I don't eat I'm not All right, okay, I'm not big, big, big, big, big game eater.
I'm a big little game eater.
Like, I I love Cornish hens.
It's when you try to assign an aesthetic to the Holocaust.
I mean, does trauma even need an aesthetic? Why would trauma need an aesthetic? Exactly.
That's why I'm here I'm here trying to find it.
You know, and for that I'm gonna need total immersion.
What I'm preoccupied with is how the materiality of death transfers to the living.
Like an airborne contamination, if you will.
That's why he slept with a mortician.
- You slept with a mortician? - She's kidding, okay.
He likes a cold bed.
- Excuse me? - Easy on the red, babe.
Mm-hmm.
So what do you do when he's not fucking morticians? (LAUGHING) Um, I'm a filmmaker.
- Oh.
- Yeah.
My latest, uh, was invited to screen at Venice.
Mm.
But I guess, for very complicated reasons, that's not gonna happen.
Why? What kind of complications? Just some bullshit.
You could say I encountered some very greedy musicians.
You didn't pay for the music? Well, they were asking for an outrageous amount.
For a nothing song.
Who would to that to indie filmmakers? I mean, it's just so grotesquely unfair.
What's unfair? It's unfair that you don't get to use somebody else's work for free? I mean, an astonishingly beautiful piece of music can make an astonishingly beautiful scene and an astonishingly beautiful scene can separate a mediocre film from a masterpiece, and I'm assuming that's what you're going for, the masterpiece, the big prize.
What's it about? Your film.
Uh, it's a (CHUCKLES) Um, it's about a couple.
- Mm.
- Or, uh, I would say the woman in the couple, actually.
I guess she she kind of represents all women, and, uh, society's, you know, - crushing expectations.
- Sounds horrible.
Sounds like you're crushed by something.
(LAUGHS) Is she any good? Excuse me? You're good.
You can discern.
Have you seen this film about society's crushing expectations? Yeah, but, you know, an early rough cut, but, um My guess is that she doesn't want to be a filmmaker, 'cause if you wanted to be a filmmaker, you'd be one.
Ah-ha.
This is, uh, that teaching technique I've heard so much about.
The provocateur.
Well, I'm also gonna hazard to guess that the reason that she finds herself with all these unfinished projects I never said that.
I never said that.
That never came out of my mouth.
It's just a question of desire.
Not timing or talent or circumstance, it's pure want.
Which you don't possess.
And don't confuse desire with entitlement around your filmmaking.
- Am I wrong? - It's also a question of financing.
If all it took was desire, Dick, there would a tr a trove of amazing films by women filmmakers, but now we just have this there's a graveyard of unmade work.
Well, maybe this supposed graveyard of unmade films by women filmmakers is there because, ultimately, most films made by women aren't that good.
See, I think it's really pretty rare for a woman to make a good film because they have to work from behind their oppression, which makes for some bummer movies.
Sally Potter, Jane Campion.
Chantal Akerman.
Excuse me.
Susan Sontag, she she was great.
(INDISTINCT CHATTER) I think this sauce is cream based.
Could be.
(SIGHS) I want to take your seminar for audit or whatever.
When does it meet? SILVERT: I thought you were gonna go back to New York.
Oh, no, I think I'll stick around Marfa.
Oh, you're staying here? What's your reading list? I actually don't have a syllabus.
I haven't read a book in ten years.
I'm post idea.
(KNOCKS ON TABLE) Thanks for the invite.
What the fuck is post idea? (CRICKETS CHIRPING) (TYPING) SILVERT: Are you gonna come to bed? What are you doing? - Huh? - Just Nothing.
Just go back to bed.
Just go back to bed.
What are you writing? I don't know, I'm just fuckin' around.
I think it could be I don't know, it's could be a short story disguised as a letter.
- Mm.
- It's just fiction.
I'm just fuckin' around.
Please, please.
Who's your letter to? - Dick.
- Dick.
So read it to me.
Come on.
Read it to me.
"Dear Dick "I never understood before tonight "how one chance meeting can alter the course of events in someone's life.
"I've met charismatic people before.
"I've been warmed by their glow.
"I never had someone shatter in one glance "the persona that I have spent decades constructing.
And I've made myself breathless With all of my worthlessness Fire in my brain, will you make it okay? Does it kill you to know that we're all dying? Kills me to know Does it kill you to know that we're all dying? It kills me to know Fire in my brain but I douse it in rain "I wonder if you knew that when I got up from the table "I thought you were following me, "stalking your prey.
"I imagined I was cornered.
"I wanted to be cornered.
"I waited in the bathroom like a stupid girl.
" Stupid girl.
"Did you know I was waiting for you?" We love fire escapes Fire in our brains, you will make it okay "You looked at me all night like you wanted to touch me.
"And strip me.
"Be all gentle with me, "because you knew how badly I wanted you to be rough.
"So, so rough.
" Look at that.
Oh, you're so wet.
- Oh.
- (MOANING) Turn over.
- (MOANING) - (GRUNTING) (PANTING) Oh, we broke our dry spell.
- (GROANS) - Oh, God.
- Baby.
- Mm-hm? I'm so glad you're staying here.
Woo! (KNOCKING) Hey, Dev, it's Jeff and Sookie.
We're coming in.
Hello.
Ah, oh, no.
Get up, you sleepy little bird you.
- Want something to drink? - Yeah.
- Here you go, my dear.
- Yep.
Thank you.
All right, guys, thank you for coming.
What's going on? Clear your next six weekends.
- All right.
- Okay.
I'm writing a play.
- Really? - Yeah.
It's, uh It's about a couple from New York.
It's not about a couple, it's about a woman.
And she hates herself.
And her husband, he kind of hates her, too.
And the play is about them figuring that out.
CHRIS: Dear Dick - - (WOMAN SINGING IN FOREIGN LANGUAGE) (WOMAN CONTINUES SINGING) (WOMAN CONTINUES SINGING) (WOMAN CONTINUES SINGING) (LAUGHTER)