Kung Fu Panda: The Dragon Knight (2022) s01e01 Episode Script

1
[mystical music plays]
[majestic music plays]
[exclaiming, grunting]
Skadoosh!
[mystical music plays]
[Po] Once again, hear tell of Po,
the Dragon Master!
- [roaring]
- [majestic music plays]
[roaring]
[Po] Revered in all of China
for his bodacious skills.
So self-confident
he uses words like "bodacious"
long after they've gone out of fashion.
[Po] He has defeated the most dangerous
and cunning enemies of China.
He has risen to great levels
of achievement and fame.
He even has his own Happy Lunch toy,
and is loved by the Emperor himself.
And on top of all that,
he has won Employee of the Month
at his dad's noodle shop
seven years in a row.
- Oh, no. Except that one time
- But it wasn't his fault.
[Po] And now, with the land at peace,
and inactivity making him
slightly flabby and easily winded,
he has accepted
the challenge of a lifelong dream.
A food tour of China!
Oh, you deserve it, Po.
Now, go out there, enjoy your fans,
and realize that the best food in China
is made by me.
[music chimes]
Where are you going first?
Pei-Pei's House of Fat Gobs
in Wankun village,
home of the WuGao Gauntlet. [laughs]
[Po] That thing's insanely powerful.
I can't wait to check it out.
[cheerful music plays]
- Ah! [chuckles]
- Yay! [chuckles]
- Dragon Master!
- Hey.
Hey!
Mm!
Hey, it's the Dragon Master.
Look, it's Po.
Oh, hey!
Wow.
[chuckling] Hey.
- [clamoring]
- Will you sign my parchment?
[villager] Bye. See you later.
[majestic music plays]
Ah, I can smell those fat gobs already.
[stomach rumbles]
The wait's almost over, buddy.
[groaning, panting]
[gasps] Oh, man.
[Po] The WuGao Gauntlet!
[whispers] So cool.
[gasps] Oh! But first,
Pei-Pei's House of Fat Gobs. [chuckles]
- There he is.
- The Dragon Master.
[villagers exclaim]
[laughing]
Oh! Dragon Master!
[cheering]
Uh, hey guys, yes.
It's me. Love you, too. Gotta keep moving.
Mr. Dragon Master,
can I have an autograph?
[villager 2] Kiss the baby!
K-Kiss the baby.
No kissing. Nice to see you.
- I named my child after you.
- [Po] I wish I could stay.
- Let me get closer.
- I gotta keep it moving.
- [villager 3] Can you sign my nunchucks?
- [groaning]
- Hey, hey, hey, okay. Watch the fur!
- [gasps]
- Me, me, me!
- [Po] Y'all have no boundaries.
- [Po] Okay. [laughs]
- [laughing]
[chuckling] Little space here. Guys.
Okay, no touchy.
I love you, bye. Whoa! [yells]
- Oh no, let me in!
- [straining]
- [Po] Hey. [grunting]
- Oh, I'm so sorry.
- [Po] Please.
- But the crowd!
- [Po] I know.
- I fear for the safety of my restaurant.
Please? So hungry.
Do you have a private dining room?
- [groaning]
- [soft music plays]
Okay, okay.
- [door slams]
- [crowd groans]
[lively music plays]
- Me too!
- Sign this for me!
- [crowd clamoring]
- [suspenseful music plays]
[music grows ominous]
- [grunts] You can eat in here.
- No, I don't think I wanna Whoa!
Wait, in the closet? Really?
Hm. I'll fetch you a fat gob.
I'm all alone in here. [grunts]
[groans]
- [sighs, gasps]
- [stomach rumbles]
Alright, I know, I know. I'm hungry too.
[ethereal music plays]
[gasps] Oh hello, Radish.
[Po groans]
[sighs, grunts]
- [Po grunts]
- [soft music plays]
[sighs]
- [whirring]
- [suspenseful music plays]
[dramatic music plays]
Hm?
[whooshing]
Huh?
[running footsteps]
[dramatic music plays]
- [shrieks]
- Stop them.
- Stop them! Somebody stop them.
- Not the gauntlet!
[music intensifies]
[sighs] And even though
everyone's always asking,
"Where's the Dragon Master?"
no one asks, "How's the Dragon Master?"
Huh. I never thought of it that way.
That's what I like about you, Radish.
- [distant screaming]
- You just get me.
- They're heading for the gauntlet!
- The gauntlet?
[gasps] The gauntlet!
Now, hold that thought.
- [door rattles]
- Huh?
[grunts] What gives?
Uh, hello? Hello, Pei-Pei?
Pei-Pei, you out there? Uh
[Po chuckles] The door seems to be stuck.
I gotta get out there and save the day.
- Yes, yes, you're very hungry.
- [Po] Pei-Pei!
- I get it. It'll be ready soon.
- [Po] I'll kick it open.
- Stand firm.
- [crowd clamoring]
- [guard] No one can beat our defenses.
- [panting]
[dramatic music plays]
[grunting]
[grunting]
- [grunts]
- [clanging]
Give up now.
You're not getting the gauntlet.
[slo-mo groaning]
[cackles]
[grunts]
[grunts]
- [suspenseful music plays]
- [grunting]
[grunts]
[wailing]
[groaning]
[creaking, clanking]
- [straining]
- Not what we planned.
[female weasel] Let me at 'em!
I will take 'em all down, I will! [grunts]
I'll cook 'em up on a spit
till they spitter sputter spit!
Veruca!
Right.
[rattling]
[groaning]
[dramatic music plays]
Ready.
The Dragon Master is here!
- [exclaiming] Oh no. Whoa!
- [Pei-Pei grunts]
[exclaims, groans]
[lively music plays]
- [grunts]
- [exclaiming]
[guard 2] Hold it.
- Huh?
- [cackles]
- He's got the gauntlet.
- [villager 4 gasps] Oh no!
Everyone, get back.
- [villagers screaming]
- [gasps]
[exclaims]
[Po exclaims]
[Po exclaims]
- [cackles]
- [groaning]
[grunts angrily]
[yells]
Pity there's no time for that,
you little weasels.
- [laughs]
- We're weasels.
Right.
The Dragon Master is here!
- [groans, yells]
- Look! The Dragon Master.
He'll save our village.
[yelling victoriously]
- [villagers cheering]
- We love you!
- [whirring]
- [suspenseful music plays]
[laughing excitedly]
Whoa!
- [grunts]
- [cracking]
[yelling]
[reverberating]
[dramatic music plays]
[wheezing, coughing]
- Good news. I saved the
- [creaking]
gauntlet.
[villagers cough, groan]
- [gasps]
- [gauntlet whirs]
- [gasps]
- [soft music plays]
- [whirring stops]
- [strains]
- Nice work, Pandy.
- Hey! Whoa. Give me that.
[straining]
[exclaims]
[laughing]
[suspenseful music plays]
[Po groans]
- [Po] What? You gotta be kidding me.
- [mystical music plays]
[gasps] There's one more of 'em.
I got this.
[dramatic music plays]
[laughing]
[breathless] Hold up. Stop. Stop!
Seriously, stop, you guys.
I'm, like [wheezes]
It's been a while.
Oh, your buddies leaving without you, huh?
- Mm, okay. A little challenging.
- [joints crack]
- [grunting]
- [lively music plays]
[exclaiming]
- Huh?
- [gasps]
[exclaiming]
Oh, ow.
- [dramatic music plays]
- [exclaiming]
No!
Oh no you don't!
[lively music plays]
[grunts]
[dramatic music plays]
Whoa!
[exclaiming]
[ominous music plays]
[screaming]
- [laughs] Gotcha!
- What? How did he catch up?
Aerodynamics, baby!
- [laughs] Yes!
- [suspenseful music plays]
Surrender the gauntlet, panda,
before I set Veruca loose on you.
I'll tear him into little pieces.
Little tweety birds.
- Veruca!
- Right.
[grunting]
[exclaiming]
[gasps] The gauntlet!
[grunting]
- Give me that gauntlet.
- [grunting]
[grunts]
[grunting]
Whoa!
Do pandas swim?
[laughing]
Of course, pandas can
[dramatic music plays]
[exclaims]
[yelling]
[groaning]
[grunting, straining]
Here's an idea,
my little pandy-wandy friend.
Let us give you a hand. [slurps]
Oh, that'd be swell.
[coos]
[gasps] Just not with that hand.
[whirring]
Farewell, fuzzy friend.
[exclaims]
[dramatic music plays]
[yells]
- [splashing]
- [Po gurgles]
[squelching, panting]
[soft music plays]
[gasps]
[moaning, coughing]
Hey. Let the Dragon Master
give you a hand with that.
No thanks, panda.
Hey, I can, I can help you with that.
We don't need any more of your help.
I'm the Dragon Master.
I was just trying to
Destroy our village?
You're a master at that.
And the WuGao Gauntlet is gone.
Because of you.
That was our thing!
[groans]
Just leave it.
[whimpers]
- Maybe you want to
- Have a little snack? Yeah, good idea.
- Let everybody calm down.
- Leave.
- Leave?
- Leave.
- Leave.
- Leave.
"Leave" leave?
Look around you.
- [groaning, coughing]
- [cracking, rumbling]
[dramatic music plays]
[echoing crash]
[crashing]
[emotional music plays]
[toy squeaks]
- You're not the Dragon Master anymore.
- [gasps]
Okay. Well, I guess I'll just, uh
[wind whistles]
Leave.
[soft music plays]
[grunts angrily]
[emotional music plays]
[humming] Oh. [chuckles]
[gasps]
Hm?
Oh, Po!
Quick, come on in. My poor boy.
[sighs] Thanks.
- I could really use a
- A hug?
Yeah, and a bowl of noodles.
Got that too.
Po, everyone's talking.
Oh, things are crazy. The news, the news!
[birdsong]
That I accidentally,
not my fault, destroyed a village,
and lost an all-powerful sacred
and historical object, not my fault,
that three bad guys got away with,
kinda-my-fault-but-a-little-not-my-fault?
Uh-huh. And I'm afraid the Emperor
[whimpers]
The Emperor has taken away
your title of Dragon Master.
[muffled] No!
And, maybe worse,
the dumpling shop returned this box
of Dragon Master Happy Lunch toys.
[dramatic music plays]
No!
[thunder crashes]
[whimpers]
[suspenseful music plays]
[thunder crashes]
Uh, Po
A-Are you expecting company?
[dramatic music plays]
[Po gasps]
It's that bear!
That's one of the bandits
that stole the WuGao Gauntlet.
Why are they coming here?
What do I do? I gotta do something!
[music intensifies]
[grunting]
[exclaims]
You got a lot of nerve
and whatnot, coming here.
- [metallic clanging]
- [Po] Whoa.
That's a lot of whatnot.
Let's do this. Ha!
[grunting]
[percussive music plays]
[exclaiming, grunting]
[Po grunting]
[grunting, exclaiming]
[gasps]
[grunting]
[yells]
Ow!
[echoing clang]
- [whimpers]
- [Po grunts]
- [panting]
- [ominous music plays]
[lively music plays]
You stay away from my Po.
- [music chimes]
- [chuckles]
- [grunting, exclaiming]
- [stirring music plays]
[groaning]
Whoa! [groaning]
- [metallic clanging]
- [groans]
- [suspenseful music plays]
- Okay, okay, you win.
Don't kill me.
I haven't written a will or anything,
and I'd hate to have
my action figure collection
go to the wrong person. [whimpers]
I'm not here to kill you.
[gasps] You're a girl?
- [majestic music plays]
- I'm a knight.
Yeah, I mean, that's what I
Different spelling, I guess. "Knight."
I'm looking for the Dragon Master.
I was told he lives in that house.
Yeah, not sure
the Dragon Master still exists,
but, uh, a couple of days ago,
that would be me.
You? You're the Dragon Master?
[sighs] The very idiot
that leveled that village.
I was just there
to eat Pei-Pei's fat gobs.
And you let Klaus and Veruca
get away with the gauntlet.
So I've heard. I thought you'd be
all happy your friends got away.
They are not friends.
I'm chasing them. I'm trying to stop them.
What?
My name is Luthera of Landreth,
the Wandering Blade,
Daughter of the Saxon Guard,
Knight of England.
And you?
I'm Po.
That's about all I got right now.
Title pending, so
By order of the Queen,
I am in pursuit
of Klaus and Veruca DuMont.
Highly dangerous criminals.
They escaped London,
and are in China to locate
the very weapon you let them take.
Accidentally.
Making them extremely powerful.
It could lead to a devastating result
for England, China, and the world.
They must be stopped.
Whoa, this sounds insanely cool. I'm in.
In what?
In this, with you. I'll come with you.
I'd rather slice your guts out,
use them to string a violin,
and play it at your funeral.
Okay, little harsh. Uh [chuckles]
You got insult game, I'll give you that,
leather-shoulder-pad girl.
Knight.
Knight. But seriously,
I'd be awesome help.
Me, possibly former Dragon Master,
helping a knight from England
track down and capture super bad guys?
And returning the gauntlet would be
a perfect way for me to save face,
earn trust, and regain my title.
Uh, yeah, uh, help England.
Whatever that is.
I'll admit, I haven't made it
to a foreign land yet.
Just between us, I get a little seasick.
Once, I threw up just looking at a cork
in a birdbath. True story. So, yeah?
- I work alone.
- [yelps]
Cool. Me too.
We can work alone together.
I can help you. I'm the last person
who saw Kevin and Valerie.
Klaus and Veruca.
I know which way they headed
and how to get there.
And I have this.
[reverberating]
The WuGao Gauntlet
thumb.
- Let me see that.
- [chuckles]
Me got something you wants.
Me got. You want.
[laughs]
I'll just be keeping this in a safe place.
[grunts]
[straining] In a safe place.
[Po] Come on now!
That safe place being my thumb.
[groans]
Look, I left 'em at the Kai Yu River Pass.
Take me, and I'll show you.
I'd rather chop off your furry feet
and use them as earmuffs
while I sink you into a frozen lake.
These are all so complicated
and, uh, violent.
Okay, Wandering Blade. Keep on wandering.
'Cause that's what you'll be doing.
China's a pretty big place. [laughs]
Most of it, anyway. Toodles.
[sighs] Hold on.
Yes?
[soft music plays]
I'll make camp by the elm tree.
I leave in the morning.
- [uplifting music plays]
- Woohoo! Yes!
[atmospheric music plays]
Ah
[insects chirp]
Going on an adventure
Gonna catch me some bad guys ♪
Gonna get my title back
And earn me some trust ♪
[vocalizing]
'Cause I'm sort of still
The Dragon Master ♪
[whoops]
Is it morning?
No.
Is it morning?
No.
[birdsong]
Is it morning? Yes!
[laughs] See ya, Dad.
Gonna save China and stuff,
and restore my reputation.
Okay, son. Have fun!
[panting]
[gasping]
[stirring music plays]
Yes, yes, yes!
No, no, no! She's gone!
Luther of Lingo,
the Daughter of Wangland,
something something, is gone!
[echoing] No!
[Mr. Ping] What's wrong, Po?
[Po] I lost something!
[dramatic music plays]
And I'm gonna go find it.
[dramatic music plays]
[rhythmic music plays]