Leopard Skin (2022) s01e01 Episode Script

1
[♪]
[BUBBLING]
[♪]
[♪]
Can we talk?
After dinner. Guests are coming.
- Cancel it.
- Can't.
Phone lines are down again.
They said they will come back
by tomorrow.
[SCRUBBING]
[♪]
[DOORBELL RINGS]
Do you speak English?
Yes.
We received a phone call
about an emergency.
Oh, let me see.
- Alba!
- No fast moves.
[STEPS APPROACHING]
SIERRA: Get down.
Alba. Is that your name?
- ALBA: Yes.
- We're not here to hurt you.
We just need a place
to lay low for a little while.
Who else is in the house?
What is there to think about?
- No one.
- Good.
Where's your first aid kit?
- You're not real paramedics.
- This is a real gun.
BATTY: It's in the kitchen,
on top of the fridge.
Get it.
[♪]
Sit down.
Sit.
- Are you having people over?
- Yes.
- SIERRA: Cancel it.
- I can't.
- SIERRA: Why not?
- Phone lines are down.
When will they be fixed?
It could be a while.
Happens twice a week around here.
It's a surprise if you have
any kind of service.
What about cellphones?
Clearly, you're not from around here.
[STEPS APPROACHING]
[GRUNTING]
[PANTING]
Anybody else?
You two a couple?
- Yes.
- No.
Maybe we got off on the wrong foot here.
When I ask a question,
I'd like a straight answer.
Let's try that again.
Are you two a couple?
- No.
- Yes.
You're gonna have to work on your story.
There's no service here.
Of course not.
Alright, she's coming with me.
You good?
Let's go!
Where is he taking her?
SIERRA: The less you know,
the better chance you have
of getting out of this alive.
- Get on your knees.
- Why?
SIERRA: Because I need to tend
to this wound
and I can't keep my gun
on you at the same time.
I can help you.
You ever cleaned a bullet wound before?
No, but I'm a quick learner.
And I'm a fast fucking draw.
That's the only warning you'll ever get.
Get some rags and hot water.
[BREATHING RAPIDLY]
Looks good.
The bullet went straight through.
It doesn't look like it hit
anything serious.
You're gonna be fine.
I mean, you don't deserve it,
but you're gonna live.
Clover?
Clover, can you hear me?
[MOTORBIKE SPEEDING]
[♪]
Clover Braun.
Call me Clover.
Sierra Loba.
Call me Sierra.
I've never done a job
where the driver was a woman.
CLOVER: Makes two of us.
You mean, you're not the driver,
or you mean this is your first rodeo?
CLOVER: Oh, no, I'm the driver.
I've just never done a job
where the muscle was a woman.
SIERRA: Family business.
I was supposed to be a boy.
CLOVER: Me, too.
I know female bodyguards are becoming
more and more popular nowadays
on account of blending in
more easily than say
a bulky 300 pound goon,
but I cannot imagine a world
in which you possibly blend in.
SIERRA: What do you like to be called?
Malone is fine.
[♪]
MALONE: You're the only house
around for a mile.
BATTY: Yeah.
You two don't get scared
there on your own?
Sometimes.
Tell me about the people
coming for dinner.
Max Hammond and his girlfriend, Maru.
He's a television producer
who makes documentaries.
He does something
for the government here now,
I'm not sure what, something
with the Ministry of Culture.
- He's American.
- He is.
MALONE: Documentaries like movies?
Boring ones about coffee farmers
and Indian villages and stuff.
Huh. And what do you do?
I
Nothing much, just keep the house clean.
- So you're a housekeeper.
- I guess.
You don't sound too sure.
- What do you do?
- We're talking about you.
Oh. I thought we were done.
Pretty tough sell, you as the help.
BATTY: We fired our housekeeper,
so I'm picking up the slack.
So whose house is it?
Mine I guess.
See?
There's that lack of conviction again.
Think whatever you want to think.
[STEPS APPROACHING]
Stay low.
MARU: "Dear Mom,
you were wrong about everything."
Quitting my job and telling my roommate
she was a hefty bag of monkey shit,
prompting her to kick me
out of the apartment,
maxing out my credit card
after running out of cash
didn't turn me into a homeless
drug addict turning tricks on the side.
Au contraire,
as they say in Saint Barth.
I have landed on my feet.
Met a sweet guy.
Have a nice place to stay.
Things are looking up.
What can I tell you about Max?
It's the little details
that drive him crazy.
He likes the way I eat ice cream
because he says my mouth is hypnotizing.
He likes the sound of my voice,
especially when I yawn.
[HIGH-PITCHED YAWN]
He says I yawn like a cat.
He just loves watching my ass.
He can spend hours watching it.
He likes it when I put my hair up
because it exposes my neck,
and he says I have the prettiest
little baby hairs there.
He likes my tan lines
because he says invisible bikinis
are the only kind of bikinis
that matter.
He likes to watch me dance
because he says he can't figure out
what beat I'm dancing to,
but he likes it much better
than the beat of the music playing.
But what he likes the most
about me is after sex,
the way my breath settles down
and I fall asleep for exactly one
minute, no matter
what time of day it is.
[♪]
"This is probably the best place
to start."
Maru, wake up.
Hmm?
MAX: We gotta go.
Go where?
MAX: Dinner with Alba Fontana,
for my project.
Did you forget?
No. I, uh,
I just thought it was later.
You slept for three hours.
MARU: No, I didn't.
- Did I?
- Yeah.
- Why didn't you wake me?
- I'm waking you now. Let's go.
I have to shower.
There's no time. Let's go.
I have a meeting at 9:00,
so we're not gonna be there long.
MARU: Who are you meeting with?
You know, what's the point
of always asking me
when you don't understand
the first thing about my business?
God. It's an innocent
question, it's not a crime.
Yeah, well, lately you've developed
this terrible habit of asking
questions all the time.
And it's annoying.
[PHONE VIBRATING]
Hey.
Hey! Hey, Roberto.
MARU: Okay, Mom,
he's not the warmest guy.
[♪]
He's got that inbred arrogance
that a lot of American men have,
but I'm chipping away at it,
little by little.
I see his potential.
[♪]
You're gonna wear that?
I thought you liked this dress.
Looks cheap. Wear something else.
Did I do something to upset you?
You mind if we fight in the car?
- We're very late.
- I don't want to fight at all.
Yeah, me either. So the quicker
you change, the quicker we can go.
Hey, Wilfredo
Go up to it and open the back doors.
Grab the five orange bags.
What are you gonna do?
I'm gonna make sure
nobody's watching you.
- And if they are?
- I'll think of something. Go.
[♪]
[♪]
SIERRA: What time were
they supposed to get here?
ALBA: Any minute.
SIERRA: If they get here
before my friend comes back,
you're gonna have to turn them away.
Make up a story.
Death in the family or something.
I'll come up with something
but not that.
SIERRA: Why?
It'll just raise more questions.
I'll tell them I'm sick.
SIERRA: Make it believable.
I feel sick.
You'd better go clean up.
[WATER RUNNING]
ALBA: Desperation is a trap.
Have faith.
There is some way out of this
that simply hasn't occurred to you yet.
[GASPS]
[ELECTRIC BUZZING]
[♪]
Getting emotional won't help.
So don't get emotional.
[MUSIC PLAYING ON RADIO]
You take this one emotion ♪
Somewhere you make it hard ♪
Everybody be cool.
You're gonna have a nice, short dinner
and you're gonna send them
on their way. You understand?
Say yes.
Yes, I understand.
MAX: Ah.
I guess maybe we're not the only guests?
If you try anything,
you'll be the first casualty.
And you'll be the second.
Your guests might be third and fourth,
but you'll definitely be
first and second.
- Do you understand?
- Yes.
That's the only way this works.
If something happens to somebody,
something happens to everybody.
Up to you to stay focused
and play along.
[CAR ALARM BEEPS]
Sorry we're a little late!
ALBA: Welcome.
Alba, I can't believe
how long it's been.
Ah, you look you look
terrific! Come here.
[SMOOCHES]
- ALBA: Have you met?
- Uh, yeah. We met once,
- and you look terrific also.
- BATTY: Hi.
- I'm Maru.
- BATTY: We met.
Yes. Right.
Come in.
And this is Fausto, the new butler.
Hey, pal.
Hey. Can I get you folks a drink?
I'll have a whisky.
MALONE: Um, can I get anybody
anything else?
Can you make a martini?
- MALONE: Gin or vodka?
- Uh, gin, please.
- MALONE: I'm obliged.
- Are you sure about this?
You think it should be vodka?
[LAUGHING]
Well, butlers are all the rage.
Well, he's been a lifesaver
ever since Inocencia left.
Yeah. He's first rate.
[GLASSES CLINKING]
MAX: To Archie. A great man
who brought us all together.
Yes. To Archie.
And despite his many accomplishments
and a life well-lived,
I don't think he would've ever
guessed that you two
would be working together
to organize his archives.
Sometimes you have to let
bygones be bygones.
Anyway, that's the theory.
Hey. Can I get some more of that shrimp?
And I'll grab another whisky.
Thanks, chief.
And I'll have another martini.
I think you've had enough, sweetheart.
- MARU: I've had two.
- MAX: Two is more than enough.
MARU: It's not a crime.
MAX: Young people never know
how to control their liquor.
MARU: I guess by the time
they figure it out
they've turned old inside.
[MAX LAUGHS]
MAX: I swear, it is a mystery
what goes on between
those pretty little ears, huh?
Hey, where are you going?
I don't know yet.
Just loaded with impulsive behavior.
[MAX CLEARS THROAT]
The foundation is launching
a new channel,
centered on Mexico.
Its homegrown heroes, its food,
its landscape, etcetera.
And guess who's running it?
Congratulations, Max.
I want to talk to you
about documenting his career.
Now before you say anything,
just hear me out.
- Whose career?
- Archie!
MARU: Fausto?
Yeah?
MARU: Can you make
my next drink a bit stronger?
Tell you what. Gin is gone.
Why not a shot of tequila?
MARU: Is it bad to mix at this point?
Not if you're trying to get wasted.
MARU: So will you have one with me?
Sure.
Was that your girlfriend?
- Who?
- Who you were whispering with.
She's beautiful.
Nah. That was a ghost.
I hope you don't mind me saying this,
but your husband is a touch
condescending.
[CHUCKLES]
I don't mind.
And he's not my husband.
Even if I was still making
documentaries, why would?
MAX: Well, you know me, Alba.
I'm a dog with a bone and all that.
But the story of his life
needs to be told by an insider.
A more objective one, perhaps.
Not his ex-wife.
His ex-wife who's living
in her old house,
working side by side with the new wife
to organize his legacy.
Someone could make a documentary
about this right here.
It wouldn't be very interesting.
What? Well don't say no just yet.
Just think on it.
I have to use the little boy's room.
[MAX CLEARS THROAT]
Whoo! Fausto is intense.
Who'd want to see
a documentary about Archie?
No one in their right mind.
This is a money-laundering scheme.
Max thinks that because he met me
waitressing in a poker room
wearing nothing but feathers,
that I can't grasp he runs a side
business laundering drug money.
- It's almost endearing.
- MAX: Maru, let's go.
- We haven't had dessert yet.
- Well, next time.
It's my favorite part of the meal.
- You're drunk.
- Never too drunk for dessert.
MAX: Let's go, Maru.
- No!
- MAX: Hey.
Well, you wanna walk? You wanna walk?
I'm fine with that.
- I'm in great shape.
- Better if you drive.
- It could be dangerous.
- Yeah. Very dangerous.
Dangerous how?
If someone tries to kidnap me,
I will tell them I was almost raped
by my math teacher once,
but my vaginal muscles
clamped down on his dick,
making it impossible for him to withdraw
for almost two hours.
It's an ultra-rare condition
called penis captivus.
- Look it up.
- Right.
- She's a pathological liar.
- MARU: Well, that's true,
But the penis captivus thing is legit.
MAX: And I'm sure it sounds
fascinating inside your head
but out here it sounds like
the nonsensical ramblings
of a spoiled drunk. Come on, let's go.
Well, like you always say:
"opinions are like hemorrhoids."
- I never said that.
- "Every asshole eventually"
I never said that.
Maybe it's one of your cartel
lawyer friends who says it.
What's his name?
Wilfredo!
- Good night, Maru.
- Good night, Hitler.
I'm sorry about this.
Uh, I really, really have to go.
Thank you.
If he doesn't make on time
to his business meetings,
they actually might decapitate him.
[CAR ALARM BEEPS]
[CAR ENGINE REVVING]
[♪]
[♪]
[♪]
[TORCH FLAMING]
[♪]
[♪]
[THUD]
MALONE: We still clear?
Crystal.
[♪]
MALONE: Go, go, go!
[ENGINE REVVING]
You wanna take a picture or what?
CLOVER: Everything go okay?
Absolutely fine.
[♪]
SIERRA: Why are we slowing down?
CLOVER: Checkpoint.
Okay. Don't sweat it.
[♪]
[♪]
[INDICATOR CLICKS]
- What are you doing?
- Something's fucking wrong!
We went over this!
[GUNFIRE]
[♪]
You shouldn't be up.
I have to pee.
Where are we?
Somewhere safe, for now.
- Sierra?
- MALONE: Asleep.
I'm taking the first shift.
- And the diamonds?
- We have them.
I'm sorry about the checkpoint.
I understand if you're upset.
- MALONE: I'm not upset.
- You're not?
Do me a favor, pull down your pants.
[CHUCKLES]
- You can't be serious.
- I am.
I'm have no sense of humor.
I'm not really feeling in the mood.
I'm not gonna touch you.
Don't think, just do.
This is why I hate
working with fucking amateurs.
Motherfucker.
What?
Go pee and go back to bed.
We'll talk in the morning.
[♪]