Mayflies (2022) s01e01 Episode Script

1
This programme contains some
scenes which some viewers may
find upsetting and strong language
As Robert Graves wrote, in the final
stanza of his poem Two Fusiliers,
"Show me the two so closely bound,
as we
"By the wet bond of blood
"By friendship, blossoming from mud
"By death we faced him
"And we found beauty in death
"In dead men breath."
Thank you.
APPLAUSE
PHONE CHIMES
Hello?
Iona?
In the bath, babe.
PHONE RINGS
Good evening, Tullygarven, Townland
of Ulster.
So, what's the sketch?
Noodles, I need to see you.
Tully, what is it?
Meet me at the caravan tomorrow
afternoon.
Don't piss about, just come.
Well, it's not as if you writers
ever do any work.
Just, just tell me now.
Get yourself home, Noodles.
MUSIC BEATS
CROWD CHEERS
Why didn't you just go in?
You've got a key.
I wanted to wait for you.
I stopped off in Saltcoats,
got us a bottle.
Half a bottle,
you tight bastard.
I was worried we wouldn't have
time to finish it.
What's going on?
I'm fucked, Noodles.
I didn't want to tell you on the
phone.
Well, I'm here now.
Just take your time, all right?
Anna and I were on holiday a few
months ago in Cuba.
God, I love Cuba.
I was, I was hiccupping a hell of
a lot.
Indigestion, it was the drink, I'd
been caning it.
So, I tell Anna when I get home
I'm going to screw the nut,
you know, that well-worn refrain.
But I didn't tell her about the
pain.
And if I'm completely fucking
honest, I'd been in pain for months.
So I get home, go to the doctors,
she sends me for a scan
..and the rest, as they say,
is cancer.
Where?
Oesophagus, liver, stomach and lymph
nodes,
whatever the fuck they are.
I've got four months
and that's the short of it.
Don't believe it.
We'll get another opinion.
It's not a matter of an opinion.
You can go private, I'll sort it.
I'd rather die than go private. No!
It can't be four month,
you look fine.
They must've got it wrong.
You sound like Anna. She wants me to
have chemo -
I'm not doing it.
Tully, you have to!
You cannot just check out,
you've got responsibilities.
Like what? Who to? Us!
Your family, the people who love
you.
I'm doing this my way.
You'll have everything you need,
all right? Just
..just ask - anything.
Don't let me die like a prick.
We all die like pricks.
I mean it.
What's your quote?
The Anthony and Cleopatra one.
"Make death proud to take us"?
That's it. That's the one.
Does Fiona and your mum know?
Fiona does.
That was hard, telling her and the
kids.
They're so great.
The young are going to save us.
I haven't told Barbara and I'm not
going to.
She's your mother.
Get you, pontificating about
mothers.
Do you want to see Barbara?
When?
Now. We can walk.
She'll be having her tea.
It's soup tonight.
Come on.
# Into the valley
# Betrothed and divine
# Realisations no virtue but who
can define
# The soldiers go marching
# Those masses align #
THEY LAUGH
We're selling Barbara's house to pay
for the home.
That's brutal.
She worked hard to pay for that
house. She did.
She wanted to leave us something
after Woodbine died.
I mean it, Jimmy, I don't want her
to know.
There she is.
You got your glad rags on, Mum?
Oh, you look nice today.
Look who's come to see you.
You all right, Barbara?
It's Noodles, Mum. He's come all the
way up from London.
She won't eat it, Tully.
It's vegetable, it's good for her.
See if you can make her.
Angela, this is my old friend,
Jimmy Collins.
He's a very posh writer.
Not really.
Good for you.
Let's have a go at this soup.
You used to make me soup, Barbara.
Jimmy's broth, do you remember?
Noodles.
Oh, my.
You want your music on, Mum?
Here, Jimmy.
PIANO MUSIC PLAYS
How's your mum and dad, Jimmy?
I don't know.
Dad's gone off to find himself.
Mum said he should have started
by looking up his own backside.
Her and I live separate lives now.
How can you live separate lives in
these wee houses?
You can't swing a cat in them.
People don't need space to be alone.
You shouldn't be talking like that,
not at your age.
I'm filing for divorce.
Don't talk daft.
You can't divorce your mum and dad.
How would you manage?
I'll get a job, go out on my own,
it's no big deal.
Don't worry, Ma.
Noodles gets things done. He'll get
himself a fancy pants lawyer.
Why do you need a lawyer, Jimmy?
Been nicking vegetables again?
You look nice, pet.
You meeting Scott? Uh-huh.
We're going to the youth
meeting at the church.
God is dead, Fiona. Tully!
You'll upset your sister.
He won't.
What are you making, Mum?
Jimmy's broth.
DOOR OPENS
Doesn't he have a home to go to?
Aye.
It's here.
Happy families.
These boys are taking over my house.
I'll bring you up a tray.
Jimmy, you come here any time you
want - Ewan doesn't mind.
Mum, let's take some more, eh?
Go on.
No.
MUSIC: Look For The Silver Lining
Oh, my.
You're not a bad dancer for 21.
How long has she been like that?
A while.
It is what it is.
I don't know what's worse, dying
before your time or living beyond
it.
We've got a campaign to plan though.
I could murder a pint.
Let's walk.
It's a decent hike.
I can still walk, arsehole.
Hang on a sec, yeah? Just
..need a fag.
Aye, that's a great idea.
Are you sure you should be smoking?
That nag has bolted.
It's weird to think this dump is
where you started teaching.
It's weird to think this dump was
the start of your great escape.
Things are desperate, Miss O'Connor.
I can't get a single job interview.
I don't know what I'm going to do
with my life. It's a disaster area.
Sit down, James.
That fact is, you're only 17.
Nearly 18.
And you've read more books than I
have.
You must have read some to have
ended up in this dump.
The other day you mentioned
Edith Sitwell.
James, nobody in the history of this
school has ever mentioned Edith
Sitwell.
You know, all I know about her is
she had a long nose and wore a lot
of rings.
You should be going to university
with people who know who Edith
Sitwell is.
University? Yes.
So why aren't you?
I can't because
..because
..things are
Rough at home?
I didn't say that.
It's no big drama, Miss O'Connor.
James
..get out of here.
Pass your exams, then go and do not
turn back.
We'll start with this next term.
You're a weirdo.
And weirdos have to get out.
Your Mrs O'Connor did you proud,
you weirdo.
I wonder how many weirdos you've
done the same for.
I guarantee they don't have
another teacher like you.
Hang on.
FAUX AMERICAN ACCENT: You think I'm
a weirdo?
FAUX AMERICAN ACCENT: Yeah, but so
what?
Everybody's weird.
Stand by Me, Rob Reiner, 1986.
Ten points.
Five. Fucking cheapskate.
"I can't stand people who
laugh at other people.
"They'd get a bigger laugh
if they laughed at themselves."
Taste of Honey, predictable.
Is it fuck predictable.
Shelagh Delaney's a genius.
I'm not talking about the words,
I'm talking about the messenger.
"Oh, God, make me good, but not
yet."
ALL: Disallowed!
It's a fucking novel.
Novels are not permitted,
unless you're Noodles
and they're your lifeblood.
Limbo! Off to get wasted again.
Where's he going?
Do the boys know yet?
Nope.
I'm not ready for the onslaught
of sentiment.
You're my campaign manager,
so you can tell them.
No. Well, you said I only had to
ask.
I wouldn't know what to say.
You call yourself a writer?
I'll have an apple pie,
followed by pizza.
You mean pizza, followed by apple
pie?
I mean an apple pie followed by
a pizza pie.
Capeesh?
Cheers.
You're a bad bastard.
I'm just stating my wants with
clarity.
No time to waste, Mr Writer.
Let's do what we love best,
make a plan, do a list.
HE SIGHS
Right.
What's first?
Anna.
What am I going to do about her?
Marry her.
I mean, that's what I would do.
You're already married.
Don't you think it's a bit
weird to do it now?
I mean, we won't have time for a
honeymoon.
You will.
I don't want to leave her a widow.
She's going to be a widow
whether you're married or not.
It'll mean everything to her.
I love her so much.
Well, it's settled then.
And we'll do it properly.
No holding back, all right?
Anna's big day.
Yeah, but no sit-downy shite with
150 speeches and grannies in daft
hats bullshit.
Item two.
Chemo.
Nope.
Seriously, what's the point?
Extra time.
I was always shit at penalties.
Very true.
Unlucky, mate.
What did the doctor say about chemo?
It might give me seven months.
Fuck's sake, Tully, do it!
Nah, a don't fancy it. It sounds
like a total nightmare.
It's seven more months with Anna.
Look, this is my plan.
Cross that out.
It'll turn me into somebody I'm not.
It might not,
and you and Anna can use the time.
No.
I want control.
So write this down.
Item two
..Switzerland.
What, a holiday?
The last place I'd ever go on
holiday
is the land of fence-sitting and
fucking cuckoo clocks.
You said ask you anything.
As soon as this gets bad,
and it will soon,
get me to Switzerland for the Hitler
chow-down.
The what?
The chow-down, the suicide bullet.
When the bad time comes, I want to
end it myself and not go skelly.
I want to go to Switzerland and I
need you to sort it.
Are you saying
..assisted dying?
That's exactly what I'm saying.
What does Anna say?
I'll tell her when it's sorted,
she'll be fine.
I want you to help me. No!
Fuck, no.
Tully, I love you, but you can't ask
me to do that.
"Make death proud to take us."
You said it, you gave me my last
quote, you have to.
Is that why you got me up here?
So I got all nostalgic and say
yes?
Well, you can fuck off.
No.
Why me?
You get things done, Noodles.
Hey, darling. Hey.
I can't talk for long.
Second half's about to start.
You sound so good.
Jimmy, what is it?
Tully's got terminal cancer.
Oh, Jimmy, I'm so sorry.
And he w
He wants me to help plan their
wedding.
Oh, poor Anna.
I cannot
I mean, they love each other
so much. It's hellish.
I better go, he's, he's in the
caravan, he wants to watch a film.
He wants everything to be normal.
Fucking normal.
Top three films starring
Robert DeNiro, go.
Godfather Part II. Yeah.
Taxi Driver.
Once Upon A Time In America.
Noodles, man alive.
Only a lover of stone-washed
jeans would leave out Raging Bull.
Do you think Robert DeNiro's
a family man?
In dreams, aye,
everyone is in dreams.
My folks ain't.
I am going to divorce them.
Aye, do it.
And come to mine whenever you like,
my mum loves you.
You're in charge, Noodles.
Do life the way you want.
# Crow's feet are
engraved on my face.
# And I'm living too late #
Tibbs, if Karl Marx was in The Fall,
what instrument would he play?
Glockenspiel.
Glockenspiel?
Don't be daft, that's a hippy
contraption.
It's metal, industrial,
fits with what he says about the
means of production.
It's a bourgeois piece of shite.
Mark E would boot him out on his
arse.
Noodles, help these boys out.
Marx would be a solid bass player.
How come you were late?
I was finishing my homework.
Priorities, Noodles.
MUSIC: Living Too Late
Come on, drink it.
I fucking hate blueberries.
I know, but I don't care.
Just drink it, get it down you.
Oh, you big baby.
I hope you didn't use your feet to
mulch them.
Why would I do that when I've got
a shiny new juicer? Hmm.
And just so as you know -
I'm not going to let you die
without a battle
that involves the intervention
of an electrical appliance.
Come on.
Slange.
Oh.
Oh, don't worry, it'll freeze.
So, how is Iona's play?
Good, I think.
And when are you heading back?
Not yet. We've got stuff to do,
haven't we, Noodles?
What stuff?
Well, he's my campaign manager.
Oh, campaign manager.
So, er, you're running for office,
Tully?
Well, I thought I'd pass a few good
laws before I croak.
What's on your manifesto?
Chemo, I hope.
No chemo, I told you.
But the first thing on the list
is Anna's big day.
What big day?
Your big fuck off wedding day.
WHISPERS: Oh.
And who decided this?
We did.
And you didn't think to ask me
first?
Well, if you don't want to, then
Why would I marry a big baby
that doesn't eat his blueberries?
I'm sorry.
I love you with all my heart
..the only one of my organs
that still functions.
Hey.
So, do you fancy it?
Have the chemo
..and I'll think about it.
HE SIGHS
You lawyers, you've got me bang to
rights.
You win.
Do you mean it?
I never say anything I don't mean.
THEY LAUGH
Oh!
I love it, I love it, I love it, my
beautiful ring!
I love you with all of my heart!
If I don't see you again,
I'm going to die!
How do you think he looks?
Good.
Yeah, I know.
Jammy bastard.
The wedding was your idea,
wasn't it?
Absolutely not. Really?
Honestly. Really?
Tully suggested it, telling you.
It's what he wants.
But I want to pay for it, right?
It's my gift. No!
No.
We've got money.
What are you like, coming here,
flashing your money about?
Just let me do it.
I'm losing him, too.
You know what he's like, though,
all front.
He's in a lot of pain.
The chemo will help.
Yeah.
God, he's such a bugger.
I have been literally begging him to
do it and
..you come along and
What did you say to him?
That he'd have more time with you.
So how much do I owe you?
He has to do everything he can to
stay with me.
Yeah.
He will.
Hello.
Iona.
I couldn't leave you by yourself.
Brutal.
But refreshingly honest.
Mr Dawson, how are you doing?
Never better.
So, our job now is to keep you,
as well as possible
for as long as we can.
The chemo won't make the cancer go
away,
but it should help you stay around
for a bit longer.
Good.
Well, I've got an important gig
coming up
and I wouldn't want to disappoint my
public.
How could this happen?
I wish I knew, Tibbs.
He's having chemo though, so
..that should help, yeah?
That's what we're hoping,
but he's not keen though.
OK. So
..we take it as it comes.
We rally.
We let him be Tully.
Do everything we can to help him
stay around,
just as long as its humanly
possible.
We do for Tully
..what we should have done for
Limbo.
Limbo!
Limbo?
Don't drink any more, OK?
We had a good time though,
didn't we?
You haven't changed, Tyrone Lennox.
And you've sorted your life out,
like we always knew you would.
There's no secret to it.
I just get on with it.
Stay in touch, OK?
And tell him
..I'm here.
Let me be on my own.
I'm better in the tunnel on my own.
OK.
I've
..got far more important things
to be doing anyway, so, you know?
I'll just be in the kitchen if you
need me, though, OK?
Okey dokey.
# I hear footsteps
# Won't be long before we meet
# It's obvious
# Don't count me in and count me out
# And I'll be waiting for the show
# Oblivious! #
Do you know what I think
we should do?
We should kid on that we've booked
a Kajagoogoo tribute band.
You're evil. No way.
Hey, do you need something to drink?
Go back to bed, I'll get it for
you.
I don't need you to fucking get it.
I can get it myself.
DOORBELL RINGS
I'll get that.
No, no, no, no, I'll get it, it's
probably the air purifier I ordered.
Just go back to bed, you're annoying
me now.
DOORBELL RINGS
I'm coming.
Take that fucking thing away.
We don't need a fucking air
purifier.
We don't want it, we've got enough
shite!
Just sign there, thanks.
Sorry, he's, he's not very well at
the moment. Thanks.
Look, I know you're in a lot
of pain right now,
but I'm not your cat to kick.
Then don't fucking apologise for me
then.
I'm dying, end of, and I wish you'd
just let me get on with it!
I love you.
I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
While the war poets express disgust
at the unbearable horrors of war,
they also see a glory in the
sacrifice of these young soldiers.
But their disgust
..it didn't go far enough.
There's no glory in any of it.
All wars are a catastrophe.
All deaths are a catastrophe.
But to die young is always a waste.
Life, to be sure, is nothing much to
lose
..but young men think it is.
He seems to be doing quite well on
the chemo.
He hates it, though.
You'll have notice, I'm sure.
Been talking about other things,
too, mostly about when we were kids.
Mum always said the best times were
when you were both hanging about the
house.
Your dad didn't like it,
right enough.
Well, he wasn't well then.
He wasn't like that when Tully was
little, he loved being round him.
Tully just doesn't remember.
Jimmy, he shouldn't have asked you
to take him to Switzerland,
not without telling Anna.
So you know then?
He's not gone about it
the right way.
He can't just
..leave her out of it and make it
a secret between you and him.
I've said no.
Then just let that play out.
Just
..I feel bad, you know?
He's my best friend and he's asked
me to help him.
I know.
You love him
..but Anna does too and she's
hurting, Jimmy.
She wants him to go into a hospice
and they're wonderful places,
they would make sure that he wasn't
in any pain.
He wouldn't suffer, I've told him
this.
That's not what he wants, is it?
No.
And you don't want him to go to
Switzerland either, do you?
You don't know my feelings.
You have a faith, Fiona.
That's irrelevant, Jimmy.
It's Tully's life, it's not mine.
He is terrified he's going to end
up gasping like Woodbine.
Doesn't matter how many times
I tell him
it won't be like that,
he has decided.
So if that is his choice
..then we will stand by it.
We're taking our lead from him.
We just want him to do right by
Anna.
They have their secrets, don't they?
No.
They're completely transparent,
they just don't know it.
I resent their "thing"
sometimes, Iona, I really do.
I resent the fact that
..that Jimmy's had all these years
with Tully and I don't.
I won't.
Oh, Anna. The wedding
..it was Jimmy's idea, wasn't it?
Er, not that I know of.
Yeah, come on, it was.
I know Tully, he doesn't want all
the fuss.
But I do.
I really do.
So
..I'm grateful that he suggested it.
Good. It's your day.
Oh, it's funny, the first time
Tully Dawson crashed into my life,
all I wanted to do was marry him
and have his kids
..like I'd been waiting for him my
whole life.
You and Tully, you just
..you just fit.
I'm sorry.
We know how awful this is for you,
Anna.
Sorry. We do.
The chemo is so tough, Iona,
it really is.
Hey. Hey.
You don't want him to die,
that's not bad, yeah? Mm-hm.
Yeah, his, his oncologist says that
a strong reaction can mean
that it's working.
I can see a difference in him,
I really can, it's
..it's, er, it's quite apparent.
And the chemo could give him
another year,
I don't know, maybe, maybe two.
Soyeah
..I'd settle for that.
This is the place.
We can do drinks in the drawing
room
..do the vows and eat through
there.
Just a buffet, though, Tully won't
want any sit-downy shit.
Then he can eat or not.
And music -
that's Tully's bit.
And I want photographs, loads of
Tully -
not formal though, just, just
candid.
Thank youfor this.
It's nothing.
It's everything.
He's always relied on you,
hasn't he?
We relied on each other.
He took care of me.
He said it was all music and comedy.
And a few films.
Now it's all silence and death.
Hey.
It's not Tully when he snaps at you
like that, he's just frustrated.
I know, I know.
And I'm OK with that,
as long as he keep's doing
the chemo, we've still,
still got a chance.
We've just need to hold our nerve.
Hey, let's have another look around.
MUSIC: Totally Wired
Get tae!
These babies are mine!
Jesus.
Whatever you're on,
can we have some?!
Steroids!
Who knew?
Dexamethasone AKA Dexy's Midnight
Madness!
Who knew?!
Drop your bag, come on!
Get involved!
I'm totally wired!
Well, you look better.
I'm on Class A drugs, Noodles.
But we know there's always
a come down, don't we?
Nothing's changed, pal, nothing.
Crossed a lot of stuff off.
Your future bride and I are a
well-oiled machine.
Though, why we need posh cars
is beyond me.
To get us there,
unless you want to get the bus.
Happily.
This place has changed, eh?
Yep.
Old Woodbine wore a very particular
groove in these floorboards.
Woodbine took his shame out on us.
My dad did the same.
All the reluctant fathers.
Shit.
Why didn't I call my band that?
Eh?
That's a great name for a band.
I can't believe Anna's going along
with Switzerland.
It's against everything
she believes in.
She doesn't know,
not yet.
For fuck's sake.
I know.
I know.
It's illegal, you could get
arrested.
Jimmy, he's asking you to help him
kill himself.
Imagine how you'll feel, after,
when it's over.
You'd have to live with it
..knowing you were the one that
took him there.
She'll never forgive you -
either of you.
You can't.
It'll break her heart.
Her heart is going to break
either way.
He's my friend.
But Anna's going to be his wife on
Saturday.
Would he do it for you?
Without hesitation.
I don't care.
You can't.
You can't.
I've said no.
Good.
I'm getting out.
I'm getting the fuck out!
Strathclyde University -
English and Russian.
Guess Susan did the business then?
It was you and Barbara too,
letting me stay at yours and making
me study - all of it.
Thanks. I owe you everything, Tully.
Shut it, weirdo.
I gather you got a place.
Strathclyde, English and Russian.
Oh, that is grand.
Susan.
Mrs O'Connor to you!
You don't have to say anything.
It's all good.
Now, go and do not come back,
you hear me?
She had two brothers, you know?
Who did?
Edith Sitwell, you know, the one
with the long nose and the rings?
They were called Osbert
and Sacheverell.
Sacheverall, your tea's ready!
Noodles!
We're going to celebrate your great
escape.
Now, we can go and see these Neds at
the Barrowlands playing for
15 minutes
with their backs to the fucking
audience,
or we can go to Manchester for
the best gig in fucking history.
The Shop Assistants at The Workshop
on the Friday.
Then on Saturday, New Order, The
Smiths,
The Fall, and the fucking rest.
If we miss this, we might as well be
dead.
We're going to Manchester,
you, me, Limbo, Tibbs and Hogg,
the Ayrshire boys.
Manchester, come the fuck on!
The land of Ian Curtis and Shelagh
Delaney.
Wait. Right, pick one.
Noodles
..it's a present
..for passing your exams and getting
out.
Come on, let's go to Limbo's flat!
Woo!
CHANTING: England's getting rode!
ALL REPEAT: England's getting rode!
You bored, Davie?
I'm making something monumental.
We need a plan for when we get off
the bus.
Noodles, make a list.
First, we head to the best record
shop in the history of record shops,
straight there.
Straight there, record shop, beers.
Grub on the way to The Workshop,
then Shop Assistants.
Don't know where we'll sleep.
Then Saturday Go round the shops?
Fuck the shops, we see Manchester
in all its majesty.
Then the festival, the best time
anyone's ever had.
Then the Hacienda.
Then we lie down
..and then we die.
Where do you wash, Limbo?
I go to the baths every day.
You swim every day? I don't swim.
If God had meant me to swim,
he'd have given me the shoulders
and buttocks of Mark Spitz.
I'll need to be numb to
survive this night.
Please make full use of all
the facilities.
Mi casa es su casa.
There's only one rule.
If anybody draws a cock and balls
on my forehead when I'm asleep,
I'll fucking kill them!
STRANGE CRASH
What the fuck is Hogg doing?
I'm the Jackson of Pollok.
You're the Prick of Pollok.
MUSIC: Age of Consent
It's the burning embers of British
Imperialism,
so fuck the Commonwealth Games.
We need sanctions and a boycott.
That'll be bad for Edinburgh.
How old are you, 50?
Just cos you drive a poser mobile.
It's a silver Capri.
It's a dick mobile.
You all right, Tullygarven?
Aye, just pacing myself.
This won't be our last big weekend.
Limbo's right, Hogg, you drive a
shagging wagon.
Did the Prick of Pollok ever
get back to you?
Nope. Didn't reply to the invite.
His loss.
You scrub up well but you still
can't do a tie.
It's only a wedding.
Sort yourself out, mate.
What is this, Queer Eye?
You OK?
I've never felt better.
It's going to be perfect.
How's it going, all right?
Well, you look incredible.
So do you.
This is going to be hard.
Yeah.
Come on.
You all right? You all right?
Give a kiss.
I love you. I love you.
Thought you said you were fine?
That's what you wanted me to say.
This isn't getting any better
any time soon, Jimmy
..no matter how much you and Anna
wish it.
MUSIC: Pearly Dewdrops
Hello, you.
Hello. Hello, you.
I know this might feel like a
wedding,
but, in fact, it's a convention
for all the poor fuckers who've
had their lives blighted by the
madness of Tully Dawson. Come on.
We're missing a couple of those poor
unfortunates tonight,
but they're with us in spirit.
A lot of spirits.
Show us your arse!
That's the encore, Tibbs.
So, Tully Dawson,
we all know he's this big and
annoyingly, ridiculously handsome
bastard.
He's a unique mix of Carrot
Top and Rob Lowe.
Some people are just stars
..and Tully Dawson's the brightest.
He's given me some of the biggest
laughs of my whole life
and I know that might sound like a
small thing
..but it's fucking huge.
There's nothing greater,
so I want to thank him for that.
Anna.
Anna, she's the one we really have
to thank.
She's gorgeous, wise,
smart, bossy. Oi. Oi.
But, most of all, she puts up with
Tully's nonsense.
In fact
..she's put with all our nonsense.
And she's loved Tully like no
person could ever hope to be loved
in their whole lifetime.
Right, let the dancing commence!
ALL CHEER
MUSIC: Street Fighter
I once applied to Napier to
study journalism,
did you know that?
They asked me to suggest a title for
a column and I did -
"Britain Is A Ropey Old Cow" -
and I proceeded to dictate
aforementioned column.
British Steel is dead, British coal
is dead,
British rail is dead.
Ergo
..Britain is a ropey old cow.
And then
..I mooed.
Never change.
Ah.
It's weird, innit?
No Limbo.
I think about him a lot,
in that flat
..a halo of white powder, all alone.
Nobody should die alone.
Fuck me
..is that Hogg?
Fuck, it is.
Jimmy. Hogg.
Tibbs. Hogg.
You never replied to your
invitation.
No, I'm sorry I didn't,
but, you know
..I couldn't not come.
Is it true, that you've got six
wains and three ex-wives?
Three wains and six ex-wives.
Manchester
..that must have been the last time
we were all together.
Didn't I try and batter you?
You're just children.
Manchester?
Transmission.
The festival.
I don't remember.
Tully.
Oh, ho, ho! He made it.
Good to see you. You, too.
Thought I would pop in, say hello.
And wave cheerio?
Tibbs, take Hogg and get him
arseholed, will you?
Come on, son, let's get on it.
Don't let him near any paint.
Do you ever miss Iona when she's on
tour?
There's one good thing,
I won't miss Anna because I won't
exist.
It's you poor fuckers that'll
do all the missing.
Thank you for today.
You've done us proud.
I won't forget it as long as I live.
You know what I mean.
I don't want you to feel bad about
Switzerland, Noodles, I get it.
It doesn't change anything between
us.
Fiona said it was asking too much of
you.
She's very wise, my sister.
Why did you ask me?
I needed you to say it was OK.
Is it OK?