Queens (2021) s01e01 Episode Script
1999
1
[Radio chatter.]
[Dog whimpering.]
Excuse me, ma'am.
Where we going? "Ma'am"? [Explosions.]
[Rapping.]
Poom, poom, nani, nani My nani dripped in gold Zoom, zoom in Ferraris, fly me around the globe, huh Nasty by nature, treacherous in them hills It's P.
Sex, I make 'em pay a couple of bills It's a stick-up, stick-up On the pole, watch this bad gal Lift up, lift up, and drop, drop it like it's hot - ["Baby Shark" playing on TV.]
- Rows or twists? VENUS: Rows.
But do my baby hair like Doja Cat.
Girl, I'm canceling the Internet.
Hand me that edge control.
What's burning? Oh, God.
Mommy Shark, do-do-do-do-do, Mommy Shark Oh.
Nuh-unh, girl.
Put that back.
Upstairs.
[Children laughing.]
Ohh.
[Sizzling.]
Grandma Shark, do-do-do-do-do - Watch out.
- [Toy squeaks.]
Oh.
My goodness.
Sorry.
Listen.
I am sorry that I slept so late.
- These migraines are killing you.
- I know, I know, I know.
But you got errands, so I will get the kids to school.
You're the best.
No, baby.
You're holding this whole operation together.
You are the queen.
Hey.
Look at me.
You are the king.
You can't control what's happening to you.
I know.
I get the results from my CT scan this week.
I just I need answers.
I miss another semester, I might lose tenure.
- Look.
We'll be okay.
I got them.
- All right.
- And we gonna get you back to you.
- Yeah? - Yeah? - You're so hot right now.
- Ooh.
Stop.
- I'm just sayin'.
Professor Sex, when the last time we, you know? Mnh.
You see all them damn kids over there? - Yes.
- [Scoffs.]
Come on.
I'm just sayin'.
I just combed grits out of my hair.
Oh, you are so filthy.
Just think about it.
You're gonna think about it.
I can tell you're gonna think about it, 'cause I can see it in your eyes.
[Jeff laughs.]
Good morning, my beautiful children! Hello, hello, hello! Look at your hair.
I'ma finish doing your Did you miss me? Did you miss me? - Oh, you missed me! Come here, man.
- [Chuckles.]
Poom, poom, nani, nani, God bless ya soul Jill Da Thrill, you could chill, watch me take control I'm an angel in disguise, leave you on cloud nine Forgive me, Father, for I have sinned.
[Organ playing.]
[Sighs.]
I've been avoiding sex with my husband.
PRIEST: The Bible says we should not I'm having an affair! I've fought it for a long time, but I'm in love with someone else.
And there's more, Father.
Something I've never said out loud, to anyone.
But I have to.
Go on, my child.
Unburden yourself.
Father, I I-I can't.
Poom, poom, nani, nani, it's big mami Doin' tricks like Ducatis in a big body Butter Pecan, her majesty, queens get the money My legacy written, this royal bitch stay hungry Wait.
I'm off the Van Jones interview and now I'm doing a segment on the world's oldest chimp? This was Dana's call, wasn't it? Three minutes to show.
[Door closes.]
First you get the money then you get the power.
After you get the power they will respect you.
Now, you know you wanna be with a nasty girl Know you wanna spend time in my nasty world Gimme what I need, and I'll be your nasty girl Your nasty girl, your nasty girl This is embarrassin' Mass murder, harassment, I'm the advocate No one can fathom this Nasty Bitch flow with the arrogance [Guitar strumming.]
It's not easy to be honest, but I'm willing 'Cause I know you need it more than anything I have I hope you hear me now Falling asleep down here! I hope you hear me now Hey, ain't you one of them Nasty Bitches? [Strumming stops.]
- [Chuckles.]
- Ohh! [Feedback whines.]
[Rapping.]
This is embarrassin' Mass murder, harassment, I'm the advocate No one can fathom this Nasty Bitch flow with the arrogance Lyrical, cynical, savage, visuals paint scriptures And my mystique is Mona Lisa in faded pictures Guess the motto is something vicious When you think of these bitches Said you the best with it Until I stepped to your business Put my name on the body, disappear in the ghost Pop bottles with my girls, we run the world - [Mic thuds.]
- [Feedback whines.]
Now you know you wanna be with a nasty girl Know you wanna spend time in my nasty world Gimme what I need, and I'll be your nasty girl Your nasty girl, your nasty girl Cut! That's a wrap! Got it! [All cheering.]
I know, it's your world.
It's your world.
Dap me up.
It's your world.
Baby WOMAN: Watch the cables, people! - Nasty Bitches forever! - Forever! World-premiere exclusive video.
The number-one record in the country right now, and we've got the ladies right here with us.
All the way up, all the way up Yeah, I'm all the way up Nothing can stop me, I'm all the way up ALL: We're the Nasty Bitches.
Welcome to our crib.
RED CARPET REPORTER: records sold.
"Nasty Girl" up for two VMAs, but any response to being banned from "Saturday Night Live"? Uh, yeah, that George Bush is still an [bleep.]
! I'm all the way up Shorty, what you want? I got what you need Butter Pecan.
From the hood to Hollywood.
PAPARAZZI: Why'd you walk off stage? - What's the beef? - Are the Nasty Bitches done? Yes.
I'm all the way up, henh All the way up [Moaning.]
Excuse me? Excuse me! [Alarm chirps.]
Sorry.
This is my van.
Oh, snap! Is that That's you! Baby, she's famous! My bro had her poster on the wall.
Her? Really? What happened? Rude.
What, TLC's not getting back together? Oh, you got me confused with somebody else.
You stupid.
You think TLC be shopping for prune juice in some dirty-ass sweats? Ugh.
Have a wonderful day.
WOMAN: Boy, you stupid.
Music make you lose control Let's go, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey I've got a cute face, chubby waist Thick legs, in shape Rump shakin' both ways - Make you do a double take - Now let's go, y'all Planet rocker, show stopper Flow proper, head knocker Beat scholar, tail dropper Do my thang, mother My Rolls-Royce, Lamborghini - Blue Medina always beamin' - [Exhales deeply.]
JEFF: Oh, yes.
Oh, yes.
Yes.
Oh, you are the queen! Ohh! Oh! Oh, my God.
[Toy squeaks.]
[Woman screams.]
What - You said she was gone all morning! - Oh! - What are you wearing? - [Scoffs.]
I am, like, genuinely sorry.
I don't even like condoms, but I made him wear one every time out of the deep respect I have for you and your amazing family.
- What is wrong with you?! - Nothing.
[Stammers.]
Everything.
I - I don't know.
- A white girl?! I'm 1/8th Peruvian.
I bought this for you.
I look like a clown because two fools thought I was too disgusting to be TLC.
- If I may - No.
I think you look fantastic.
Really? Yes.
Stunning.
There's nothing more attractive than mature beauty.
I'm sorry.
I know I messed up, and I don't know what to say.
I ju Please, say something.
- [Sighs.]
- Yell at me, hit me.
I'm an asshole! Bree.
Babe, I'm sorry.
I gave up everything.
For you.
[Sighs.]
[Urinating.]
[Beep.]
Okay.
[Beeping.]
[Sighs.]
Crap.
[Door opens.]
Oh.
I thought today for sure.
Did we miss the window? Maybe.
I-I don't know.
You disappointed? Not at all.
This is all part of God's plan.
I know you believe that.
Come here.
I love you.
However this journey ends up is fine.
Because it's ours.
You deserve the best.
You are the best.
What is it? Nothing.
I love you.
That's all.
- [Door closes.]
- Hey.
Guess who brought lemon cookies.
Ah! You're amazing.
Darren loves these.
Is he home? Bowling league.
Championship.
You look nice.
Thank you.
Everything all right? I called you last night.
You didn't answer.
[Exhales sharply.]
I'm good.
I know what you're dealing with.
You know I'm here for you, right? [Chuckles.]
[Chuckles.]
[Gasps.]
I couldn't do it.
I couldn't tell Darren.
I know I said I would, and I had a plan, but I couldn't.
How far are you gonna take this before you do something you can't go back on? I am married.
I'm Catholic.
I'm also the daughter of a deacon who literally prayed over kids he thought might be gay.
Do you love me? Of course I do.
This is hard for me.
It is difficult to break someone's heart, but is this easier? Pretending to be someone you're not? No.
But I'm used to it.
And I respect your struggle, but I have got to live out in the open with the person I love.
Tina, we'll figure it out.
I've already figured it out, Jill.
It's your turn.
Tina.
- [Door opens, closes.]
- [Sighs.]
[Laughter, indistinct conversations.]
Hey, Ma.
It's been a minute.
It's been a year.
Why you gotta show up today? Can I speak to my daughter, please? Jojo! JOJO: Coming! You can't keep doing this to her.
Look, I'm doing the best that I can.
Happy birthday.
I haven't seen you in over a year.
- You gonna let me in? - No.
- I'm your mother.
- No, you're someone who pops in every once in a while with a lame gift and an excuse as to why she is never around.
Being on the road is not easy for me, either, Jojo.
It's always about you, isn't it? When I get past my issues and I really think about who you are, it makes me sad, 'cause I see someone still chasing the fame they lost 20 years ago, someone so reckless with her life, she doesn't even know who my father is.
I hope you find what it is that you're looking for.
CHARLES: Dana, I'm here to discuss yet another unjust killing of a Black man by law enforcement, and as a member of the news media, the words you use matter.
[Slurring.]
Wait.
This is on me? Racism? All a hundred and something years it's been happening? Look.
All lives matter.
Why is that controversial? I shoot straight.
I call them criminals when they commit crimes.
I call them thugs when they act thuggish.
And when Blacks act ignorant, I call them Never again will this woman work in this town.
I am totally appalled.
This is a major problem.
Dana is our top-rated host.
Because she's the last of the originals.
But someone has to look our viewers in the eye on Monday and apologize a woman of color, me, and I will make America fall in love with me.
It's what I do.
Right.
Get us out of this mess.
One more thing.
We've been negotiating my contract for months It's done.
Whatever you want.
Okay.
Now I want - More potatoes, honey? - Yes, please.
Thank you.
Um [Clears throat.]
Guys, did we say "thank you" to Mommy for this amazing dinner? ALL: Thank you.
So, how was school? School was good? Everybody have a good day? Princess? You have a good day? - Yeah.
I drew a giraffe.
- I had a pretty good day.
Yeah? What'd you make? Okay.
You had a quiz today? You had a good day? Good day? [Voices overlapping.]
JEFF: Ohh! Oh! Oh, you are the queen! - [Chair legs scrape.]
- CHILD: What's wrong? [Door slams.]
[Shouts.]
[Groans.]
- [Engine starts.]
- God.
Make room for this hottie, my picture on the TV P.
Sex made him run up his check, get up his jet Big flex, let a diamond baguette float up her neck Butter Pecan, mami, perro, un perro A dog, all she want is a boss, y monedero Jill Da Thrill - [Fart.]
- [Sighs.]
[Snoring.]
[Cellphone vibrating.]
[Chuckles.]
- [Beep.]
- Bree? Yeah, it's Bree.
Listen.
Turn the radio on.
You gonna feel a difference when you creep into nasty world I'ma make you really wanna be with a nasty girl RADIO DJ: Zoom, zoom, zoom, that was "Nasty Girl," the '90s chart-topper from the former queens of hip-hop.
Why did they break up, and where are they at? Zah-zah-zah.
A nasty girl - [Car alarm chirps.]
- Hey.
[Siren wails in distance.]
Long time.
That's what happens when you tell someone you love them and they break your heart.
You don't talk to them for a long time.
- You look great.
- I know.
What do you want? How 'bout we get the band back together? Why the hell would I do that? 'Cause we owe them.
You know what we did.
[Door closes.]
Yo! Yo! - [Chuckles.]
- Oh, man.
Ooh! - BOTH: Ehh! - [Fingers snap.]
Can you believe it's been 20 years since we imploded on that stage in San Diego? Mnh.
Mnh-mnh.
But it is really good to see your face.
I know.
You bitches! - ALL: Ooh! - [Fingers snap.]
Girl, what you been up to? Oh, I'm down in Nashville, finally expressing myself musically the way I've always wanted to, and, you know, people are responding.
- Ladies! - Ooh.
You look incredible.
Are you in professional hair and makeup right now? What a tremendous compliment.
[Chuckles.]
[DMX's "Ruff Ryders' Anthem" plays.]
Unh Please.
Please don't.
We are too old for this.
What's up - Bitch! - Aah! Stop, drop Get out of my face! Get off of me! - You get off of me! - Don't put your hands on me! Get off! Get off me, Eric! You mad? Still jealous? Of what?! Your fake J-Lo ass?! Look, everybody shut up right now before I put you both in a timeout, and you can forget about iPads! - What? - Habit.
You flew to L.
A.
to finish a fight from 20 years ago? [Scoffs.]
I'm sorry.
That's ridiculous.
- It is.
- [Chuckles.]
Listen, yo.
Y'all here, which means you heard the song.
Now, since it dropped, everyone been asking about y'all.
Lil Muffin's my artist.
She's closing out the BET Awards this Sunday.
I want y'all to perform with her.
What? I'm a mom.
I don't rap anymore.
Well, that's a 50K haul for each of you.
- [Door opens.]
- Konnichi wa, lil babies! Okay, dis gotta be quick fast, okay? 'Cause I got a Japanese lesson in 10.
Bitches want me to be a one-trick pony, but I'ma be one of dem ponies with, like, a 40-inch rainbow weave and a bedazzled horn comin' out my head.
A-A unicorn? Whatever.
Yes.
Dem.
Now, I ain't never heard of no Nappy "Nasty.
" Okay.
E-Roc played the track, and I was like, "What I'm 'posed to do wit dat?" He was like, "Trust.
" [Chuckles.]
20 mil on YouTube now.
I am straight chop stickin' crow! I understand nothing.
We are not a sideshow.
You're not a show at all anymore.
It's not 1999, when you had your one big album.
Now you're [scoffs.]
whatever you are.
Muffin has things to do.
If you're in, great.
If not, this was just a favor for Eric.
Sayonara, lil babies.
I see some things haven't changed.
Just a bunch of straight men shaping the image of a young, impressionable artist.
Look.
Whatever.
I got five kids and a husband out of work.
I could use that money.
I am still active in my parish.
There are things I can't say anymore.
It's one night.
Splash some holy water on that ass and keep it movin'.
Plus, we get to hang for a week and forget about all the crap going on back home.
Okay.
Fine.
For you.
Well, I'm in.
I want an audience again.
- Yes! - But we have way too much history to just hop back on stage - like the Brady Bunch.
- Oh, here we go.
Valeria needs to apologize.
What? A fistful of weave wasn't enough? Look, you're the reason we broke up! You used us, and you rode my talent to everything you have now.
You want me to apologize? You want me to kiss the ring? Bow down to your effortless brilliance? It's a start.
You are a stubborn egomaniac.
You hate that I have the fame that your thirsty ass is still chasing.
I came here because sometimes I feel guilty that I'm the only one that went on to have any real success.
Yo! V, come on! No.
She crazy, and this? It's beneath me.
Look.
Valeria hasn't changed.
Neither have you.
And, sadly, the beef all boils down to Eric.
You had a thing for him, he wasn't checking for you, and V landed him.
She was the least talented and now somehow the most famous.
I was the glue.
I had to be.
Bree was always buried under three dudes.
They were buried under me.
And Jill was always bitter about something, and that was before you started doing blow every night.
- Yo.
What are we doing, huh? - Mnh.
I got five kids at home, and I am not at home.
I'm at a bar, kickin' it with two of my oldest friends.
Can we please cheers to that? - Yes.
- Yeah.
Cheers to three women from Queens who stood on top of the world for a hot minute.
Mm-hmm.
Mmm.
Can I tell you guys something? I have to tell you something.
I'm gonna tell you something.
- Do you have something to tell us? - I think she has something to tell us.
[Sighs.]
I walked in on my husband "instructing" one of his students.
- With his - Penis.
Oh, not the penis.
- Does he still have it? - What? - His - Penis.
Yes.
Oh.
You really have changed.
Look.
Every chick thinks they'd walk.
Beyoncé didn't leave.
Hillary didn't leave.
And why not? Why don't we leave? It's because we sacrifice out of love, and when you sacrifice so much, how the hell you gonna walk away? We got five kids.
I don't have friends.
I have other moms who come over and talk at me about hand creams and preschools, but they are not friends.
I thought I had everything.
But I can only blame myself.
I chose this.
Yo, remember when you used to date Ja Rule? - Oh, girl.
- We caught dude outside of Limelight making out with Foxy.
You didn't blame yourself.
You didn't sulk.
- You set his Ducati on fire.
- Sure did.
Yeah, but Jeff drives a Prius, and it's in both of our names, and we tried hard.
Like, we had to get a loan, 'cause I got the Okay, well, I think what Naomi's trying to say is that you need to find Professor Sex.
You need to find the fierce woman you used to be.
For real.
Find her and cut that mother Forget about his penis.
- Ooh.
- Oh, my God.
- Wait.
- Too fast.
Oh, I love you guys.
I really needed that.
All right.
I'm gonna go call my husband.
Ooh, and I'm gonna fall asleep with a bag of Cool Ranch Doritos on my chest.
[Laughs.]
Buy me a drink.
[Chuckles.]
You still doing music? Everybody wants Xplicit Lyrics.
They don't want Naomi.
You know, I called.
- You never called back.
- You did me dirty.
You had a baby with somebody else.
You chose Valeria.
I was just the secret chick.
I was young.
You know V.
She She a lightning bolt.
You know it's dangerous, but you gotta look.
Whatever.
I I-It didn't work out with her, either.
All right.
Look.
I'm just gonna go.
No, no.
Wait.
It's good to see you.
Why'd you do all this? You know, I'm getting older.
Married twice, divorced twice.
No kids.
Rich but broke.
Nothing's all good or all bad anymore.
Nothing's pure.
It's just life.
Y'all's my first big act.
Before we messed it all up, we we had something good and pure.
Not just the group.
Me and you.
Give me a reason to love you Guess I'm chasing that feeling.
- You're drunk.
- Very.
Give me a reason But am I lying? To believe Look.
I leave in 12 hours.
Let's drink and pretend like the last 20 years never happened.
I'm down with that.
I just wanna be a woman Now, are we gonna take these drinks to my room I just wanna be a woman or do you wanna keep talking about your feelings? [Remy Ma's "Conceited" plays.]
Yes, yes See, this ain't nuttin' that you used to Out of the ordinary and usual You gotta have the mind of state like I'm so great - I was up all night working on - You mind explaining? I put my mug down.
In front of Dana.
You're gonna fire me because you think I poisoned my co-host with a racist elixir? Get ready for court! Is that what you want? Hmm? For us to hire investigators to really dig into this? We can do that, or you can quietly step down and we all move on from this nightmare.
[Groans.]
[Wheels rolling.]
[Chuckles.]
Mini-bar? Oh, tell me how something so small can inflict so much pain.
Look, we're not performing, but the dumbest thing we ever did was throw away friendships that most people never have.
That's the truth.
I'm gonna call you guys, and you better answer.
Of course.
I'm in! We should do it.
The show.
I was being petty.
[Cellphone chimes.]
[Click.]
"'Shade' host Valeria Mendez stepping down after three years.
" Girl, what did you do? Wait.
You got Google Alerts on a bitch? Keep your enemies close.
You know me better than anyone.
I'm the kind of person that screws three ladies over who care about her and then turns around and asks them for a favor.
That's me.
That's what I'm doing.
You have no reason to have my back when I never really had yours, but I do know the only time I had anything resembling a family is when we were together.
We are family.
- You're still gonna need an apology.
- I'm still gonna need an apology, mm-hmm.
[Chuckles.]
I'm sorry.
I'm not Jill Da Thrill anymore.
Then we do it our way this time.
For wives, moms, and ambitious hos everywhere.
- [Chuckles.]
- Y'all are mad corny.
[Laughter.]
Come on.
[Sighs.]
- ALL: Whoo! - [Fingers snap.]
Okay, so a mom, a church lady, a washed-up musician and a disgraced daytime TV host are gonna be performing at the biggest Black awards show in the world in four days? Don't look ahead, there's stormy weather Tell me how this isn't gonna be a disaster.
Check it out, check it, check it out 'Bout to show y'all what this bitch is all about My pen game is Saddam Hussein to your brain So insane, I got him in chains like a slave Never been afraid, go against the grain like a fade A renegade, I blew up the lane like grenades Now, what you know about writin' every rhyme? Spittin' every flow and bodyin' every line? I body everybody, my body of work shines When it's all said and done, I'm the greatest of all time Young and reckless, they called us bitches and hos Only God can judge me, 'cause Heaven only knows It's harder to live right when you livin' in sin I used to think the best thing in life was chasin' men The preacher's daughter, I wanted fame and the glory But I ain't trippin', 'cause it's all part of my story Yeah, dear Father, forgive me for my sins But I'm chasin' my dreams 'cause I was born to win, unh Born to win, Jill, you so right It's a Queens thing, baby, we bad bitches for life I been around the world, 40 days, 40 nights 40 karats, 40 chains, "Miami Vice" Top of the world, top floor, penthouses Lobster and shrimp, one dinner is ten thousand Tell Xplicit we going to whenever September or November, October or December Ha, I could've ended that better, but whatever I really, really work my body Sittin' in my Bugatti Chillin' while I'm killin' hibachi, drippin' Versace Trippin', I'm a nasty girl in a nasty world Make the classiest and ratchets - Wanna take a nasty tour - Oh Was an introvert and muddy, but I'm in the dirt Now my same bullies gotta ask me for a picture first Flip a verse, did it work, still on top Went from the block to the Billboard charts - And I still won't stop - You ready? Smooth as the Land O'Lakes, you, you's a fan of me Feet cocked, I'm sittin' on the couch watchin' anime Big watch with a big chain, a big house on Biscayne I switched out that big lane My big mouth got big fame, I been that They say you can't make a ho a housewife, I beg different Gray sweats turn into lingerie in a minute Proud Mary, proud mommy, I does it all Made it through the struggle, stumbled, but never fall Look, you wanna see me humble, I want the crown Sky's the limit, can't keep a good mom down Gave my soul to you, body and all of the above In the end, you was lookin' for a teenage love I'm a queen, though, I glow, kick 'em to the side - On my Mary J.
Blige, I'm not gon' cry - Whoo! I'm a grown-ass woman, need a man, not a boy Tricks are for kids, and you could never play me like a toy After everything I gave for you Cooked for you, bathed you I was every woman, and I never would've played you But too bad, you lost the best you ever had And I'm still fly, I bring the beach to the sand - [Door opens.]
- Back up with my girls, no time to waste P.
Sex, Nasty Bitches, always in first place Can we talk? Go ahead.
They all know what you did.
I need you to come home.
Jeff, I told you.
I needed space.
I don't want to do It's cancer, Bree.
The CAT scan.
It's a tumor, and then the migraines are caused by the tumor.
It's bad.
I need surgery.
Look.
I know what I did to you.
I just I don't want to tell the kids alone.
Hey.
Did, uh Did Art finally get to sleep? No.
He did stop crying, though.
I mean, we just told him his dad might die.
So, listen, uh, I've been doing a lot of research binging "Grey's Anatomy," I mean and, apparently, depending on the location of the tumor, uh, judgment and impulse control may be impaired, so maybe and I'm just thinking here uh, that can explain why, you know, um, I did what I did.
Are you kidding me? You want me to watch a TV show so maybe I'll feel better about you pile driving one of your students in our bed, in the home that we share with our five children that I birthed?! Nah, bruh.
You couldn't even give me the satisfaction of being pissed about what you did.
You had to go and catch cancer.
Do you know how excruciatingly unfair that is? But you will not die, homie.
[Chuckles.]
Hell no.
I will do everything in my power to keep you alive because I want nothing more than the absolute pleasure of nursing you back to health and then leaving your ass! I am performing with my girls.
You don't get another piece of me.
[Groans.]
Sleep on the couch, bitch! WOMAN: Good.
Hit five, six, seven, and Nice! That's good, ladies! All right [Mumbling indistinctly.]
I used to wonder where I'd be if I had your talent.
I mean, you parlayed it.
I didn't.
You have a family.
I got a kid.
I don't have no family.
What's the story with Jojo's dad? He wasn't ready to be a dad, and he wasn't ready to be with me, so I never told him.
I guess I thought that was better than Jojo knowing and him not being around.
My mom left me at the back door of a shelter when I was 2.
I'm sure there are good foster parents, but I never met any.
When I'd get to a new home and someone would beat the hell out of me, tell me I'd never amount to anything, I told myself I'd prove them wrong.
I did, but I still go to bed every night wishing my mom would call me.
You gotta keep trying.
Because if Jojo's anything like me that's all she wants.
Can we go back to beefing, please? [Chuckles.]
- [Door opens.]
- I got my regrets, too.
[Door closes.]
I let the one relationship I knew was real slip away.
What's good? How'd it go? Amazing.
I made a reservation for dinner tonight.
We're gonna catch up, and you can't say no.
Guess I can't.
[Woman sobbing.]
[Door opens.]
Everything all right? Nah.
But who wanna hear that? Me.
I do.
All these dudes got their hands in my pocket.
Like, who they want the best for? Me or them? Them.
Honey, these dudes will pick you apart until there's nothing left but bones.
Trust.
What's your name? - You know my name.
- Your real name.
- Why you wanna know that? - Do people not ask you that? Police.
Well, I'm asking.
Lauren.
Lauren.
Don't let this persona, the fame define you, because when it's all gone, you won't know who you are.
[Exhales sharply.]
Well, damn.
Maybe I'll grow up to be like you someday.
All put together with the whole world figured out.
You don't know me.
What y'all doing tonight? Wanna shoot through the crib? I got the plug on Benihana delivery.
You know, that sounds awesome.
Cool.
Just gotta put my face on.
My bad.
D'you want? I'm good.
Okay.
[Snorts.]
Mm [Nicki Minaj's "Beez in the Trap" plays.]
Girl, you been in Montana too long, just walking up in people's cribs like you're Mr.
Rogers.
That was his house.
She probably couldn't hear us over the music.
I beez in the trap, be-beez in the trap Lauren?! What's up? It's Jill and the girls! can't tell me nothin' This what hot girls do? Oof.
JILL: Oh, my God! Oh, my God.
Damn.
Call an ambulance.
NAOMI: Please.
We need an ambulance.
A girl just overdosed.
[Monitor beeping.]
[Clears throat.]
What happened? Tell me you didn't have the most recognizable rap star in the world admitted to a county hospital.
She overdosed.
She could have died.
And you may have just killed her career.
You all right? - [Weakly.]
Yeah.
- Perfect.
Hey.
Let's get out of here.
She's not going anywhere until she's properly discharged.
Did you know she had a drug problem? She's young.
All right? People party.
Jill, you know the game.
Partying doesn't get you in the hospital.
I know.
You know I know.
This is a really dope after-school special, but we have a show.
She needs rehab.
The BET Awards is promotion for the album.
Failure to perform is breach of contract, and the label will go after every cent of her advance.
Is that money still around, or did it fly up her nose? Jill, this is business.
She is not a business! Lauren, you have to speak up.
[Exhales sharply.]
- These my people.
- CHARLIE: It's settled.
Muffin has the stage all to herself, as she should.
Nah, nah, nah, chief.
Nobody said Look, it's been real, but it's time for you to go.
Your plane tickets back to pre-menopausal obscurity will be at the hotel.
- Turn the other cheek.
- What? You slapped him? Straight knocked homeboy out.
I mean, it'd be funny if he wasn't the dude who gave us this opportunity.
Forget him.
Lauren needs us.
I didn't know that girl till a few days ago.
She's alive.
The only thing that's gone now is our shot.
- Naomi, really? - I mean, seriously, is your life so perfect now that you got time to fix other people's? You don't know what you're talking about.
Some of us don't have the perfect house - or the perfect husband - Stop.
with a stomach full of under-seasoned potatoes au gratin or whatever else you folks eat in Montana.
Shut the hell up.
- Shut me up.
- Ladies! You know, you should focus a little less on fame and a little more on that kid you abandoned.
Ugh! I needed this.
Are y'all two ever out for anyone but yourself? Yes.
I agreed to do the show because my career blew up in my face, but then I was in a cypher again with you ladies, and I felt it the magic we had on that boat.
I got to take my mask off for a few days, and I am scared as hell of having to put it back on again.
I'm gay.
I am gay! [Exhales sharply.]
That must've felt really good.
Ooh, yes, Lord, it did.
Yes, and I am madly in love with someone else.
I mean, Tina is the first person who made me feel like I could be honest with myself, honest with the world.
[Sighs.]
My husband is amazing.
I mean, he saw something in me when no one else should have.
He doesn't deserve this.
- You deserve to be happy.
- Yeah.
[Breathes deeply.]
I'm sorry.
All right.
Stand up.
Okay.
We don't need a crowd, and we don't need a stage.
We need each other.
Okay? [Door opens.]
Hi.
I just came to say thank you.
I'm not used to people looking out for me, so Listen, I have to perform tomorrow, but I'm not doing the show without you guys.
[Guitar strumming.]
It's not easy to be honest, but I'm willing 'Cause I know you need it more than anything I have I hope you hear me now I hope you hear me now I've done a lot of things I hate myself for But I know you must Hate me more But hear me [Audience cheering.]
LIL MUFFIN: Thank you for this opportunity.
It's always been a dream to close the BET Awards, so thank you so much.
I don't want to be afraid no more I just want to love you best I can And in return, I tried to understand All of the hurt I caused when I was lost and weak - I hope that you hear me now - We need to talk.
Now, I didn't know nothing about the Nasty Bitches, but now I'm grateful that I do.
They've earned the spotlight all to themselves, and I want to give them that, because I would not be here without them.
- What the hell is going on? - Nothing you can stop.
Ha-ha! All of the hurt I caused When I was lost and weak, yeah I hope that you hear me [Helicopter blades whirring.]
[Cheers and applause.]
Take it off! Poom, poom, nani, nani my nani dripped in gold Zoom, zoom in Ferraris Hold up, hold up, hold up.
I got a question.
Are my ladies in the building tonight?! [Cheers and applause.]
Any moms in the building tonight, holding it down, still sexy, don't need no man? - [Cheers and applause.]
- That's right.
I used to be a Nasty Bitch.
Tonight? I'm a queen! [Cheers and applause.]
Poom, poom, nani, nani, my nani dripped in gold Zoom, zoom in Ferraris, fly me around the globe, huh Nasty by nature, treacherous in them hills It's P.
Sex, I make 'em pay a couple of bills It's a stick-up, stick up On the pole, watch this bad gal Lift up, lift up, and drop, drop it like it's hot Give it to you good, make you rise to the top, huh Sassy, intelligent, knock 'em out the box Queen chick, I'm the baddest dream bitch, huh Supreme chick you wanna be seen with Face so pretty, baby body full of curves If he can't handle the speed, I kick him to the curb Now you know you wanna be with a nasty girl Know you wanna spend time in my nasty world Gimme what I need, and I'll be your nasty girl Your nasty girl, your nasty girl Poom, poom, nani, nani, your body looking delicious Power couple, you always handle your business Played the shy role for too long, let's face it Boss bitches only, ain't nothing about me basic When I'm next to him thinkin' about you Wanna tell him so bad, I know you want that, too 'Cause he deserves better than all the lyin' and the hidin' Smilin' in his face, when in the meanwhile I'm so blessed, no more stress, letting you know This is us forever, I ain't lettin' you go Yeah, I never knew I would end up kissing a girl But thanks to you, now I can tell the whole world Now, you know you wanna be with a nasty girl Know you wanna spend time in my nasty world Gimme what I need, and I'll be your nasty girl Your nasty girl, your nasty girl Poom, poom, nani, nani, it's big mami Doin' tricks like Ducatis in a big body Butter Pecan, her majesty, queens get the money My legacy written This royal bitch stay hungry Nasty women, we about nothing but winnin' It's money over men, you never catchin' the slippin' I could do the shoppin' myself with blank checks You pull up with the Rolls-Royce I pull up with the jet I pull up with the princess cuts and the baguettes I pull up with the Louis luggage, I made it a set Get what I want and never think about the cost Nasty bitch? Nah You can call me the boss Now, you know you wanna be with a nasty girl Know you wanna spend time in my nasty world Gimme what I need, and I'll be your nasty girl Your nasty girl, your nasty girl This is embarrassin' Mass murder, harassment, I'm the advocate No one can fathom this Nasty Bitch flow with the arrogance Lyrical, cynical, savage, visuals paint scriptures And my mystique is Mona Lisa in faded pictures I made a hit list, I'm a queen, young, Black and gifted A fashion misfit, this ain't pretty dresses and lashes This is Queens madness, rep my borough thorough as men And when it comes to the paper They wanna borrow my pen Guess the motto was something vicious When you think of these bitches Said you the best with it Until I stepped to your business Put my name on the body, disappear in the ghost Pop bottles with my girls, we run the world, ho Now, you know you wanna be with a nasty girl Know you wanna spend time in my nasty world Gimme what I need, and I'll be your nasty girl Your nasty girl, your nasty girl Now, you know you wanna be with a nasty girl Know you wanna spend time in my nasty world Gimme what I need, and I'll be your nasty girl Your nasty girl, your nasty girl - [Song ends.]
- [Cheers and applause.]
- Whoo! - Yes! [Rhythmic clapping.]
Whoo! Yes! Oh, my God.
You did it, Jill.
You are amazing! Thank you.
Nasty Bitches forever! [All cheering.]
So, a mom, a washed-up musician, a disgraced daytime TV host, a lesbian church lady, and a young rapper fresh out of rehab are going on a world tour? Yeah.
Cool.
I'm coming out
[Dog whimpering.]
Excuse me, ma'am.
Where we going? "Ma'am"? [Explosions.]
[Rapping.]
Poom, poom, nani, nani My nani dripped in gold Zoom, zoom in Ferraris, fly me around the globe, huh Nasty by nature, treacherous in them hills It's P.
Sex, I make 'em pay a couple of bills It's a stick-up, stick-up On the pole, watch this bad gal Lift up, lift up, and drop, drop it like it's hot - ["Baby Shark" playing on TV.]
- Rows or twists? VENUS: Rows.
But do my baby hair like Doja Cat.
Girl, I'm canceling the Internet.
Hand me that edge control.
What's burning? Oh, God.
Mommy Shark, do-do-do-do-do, Mommy Shark Oh.
Nuh-unh, girl.
Put that back.
Upstairs.
[Children laughing.]
Ohh.
[Sizzling.]
Grandma Shark, do-do-do-do-do - Watch out.
- [Toy squeaks.]
Oh.
My goodness.
Sorry.
Listen.
I am sorry that I slept so late.
- These migraines are killing you.
- I know, I know, I know.
But you got errands, so I will get the kids to school.
You're the best.
No, baby.
You're holding this whole operation together.
You are the queen.
Hey.
Look at me.
You are the king.
You can't control what's happening to you.
I know.
I get the results from my CT scan this week.
I just I need answers.
I miss another semester, I might lose tenure.
- Look.
We'll be okay.
I got them.
- All right.
- And we gonna get you back to you.
- Yeah? - Yeah? - You're so hot right now.
- Ooh.
Stop.
- I'm just sayin'.
Professor Sex, when the last time we, you know? Mnh.
You see all them damn kids over there? - Yes.
- [Scoffs.]
Come on.
I'm just sayin'.
I just combed grits out of my hair.
Oh, you are so filthy.
Just think about it.
You're gonna think about it.
I can tell you're gonna think about it, 'cause I can see it in your eyes.
[Jeff laughs.]
Good morning, my beautiful children! Hello, hello, hello! Look at your hair.
I'ma finish doing your Did you miss me? Did you miss me? - Oh, you missed me! Come here, man.
- [Chuckles.]
Poom, poom, nani, nani, God bless ya soul Jill Da Thrill, you could chill, watch me take control I'm an angel in disguise, leave you on cloud nine Forgive me, Father, for I have sinned.
[Organ playing.]
[Sighs.]
I've been avoiding sex with my husband.
PRIEST: The Bible says we should not I'm having an affair! I've fought it for a long time, but I'm in love with someone else.
And there's more, Father.
Something I've never said out loud, to anyone.
But I have to.
Go on, my child.
Unburden yourself.
Father, I I-I can't.
Poom, poom, nani, nani, it's big mami Doin' tricks like Ducatis in a big body Butter Pecan, her majesty, queens get the money My legacy written, this royal bitch stay hungry Wait.
I'm off the Van Jones interview and now I'm doing a segment on the world's oldest chimp? This was Dana's call, wasn't it? Three minutes to show.
[Door closes.]
First you get the money then you get the power.
After you get the power they will respect you.
Now, you know you wanna be with a nasty girl Know you wanna spend time in my nasty world Gimme what I need, and I'll be your nasty girl Your nasty girl, your nasty girl This is embarrassin' Mass murder, harassment, I'm the advocate No one can fathom this Nasty Bitch flow with the arrogance [Guitar strumming.]
It's not easy to be honest, but I'm willing 'Cause I know you need it more than anything I have I hope you hear me now Falling asleep down here! I hope you hear me now Hey, ain't you one of them Nasty Bitches? [Strumming stops.]
- [Chuckles.]
- Ohh! [Feedback whines.]
[Rapping.]
This is embarrassin' Mass murder, harassment, I'm the advocate No one can fathom this Nasty Bitch flow with the arrogance Lyrical, cynical, savage, visuals paint scriptures And my mystique is Mona Lisa in faded pictures Guess the motto is something vicious When you think of these bitches Said you the best with it Until I stepped to your business Put my name on the body, disappear in the ghost Pop bottles with my girls, we run the world - [Mic thuds.]
- [Feedback whines.]
Now you know you wanna be with a nasty girl Know you wanna spend time in my nasty world Gimme what I need, and I'll be your nasty girl Your nasty girl, your nasty girl Cut! That's a wrap! Got it! [All cheering.]
I know, it's your world.
It's your world.
Dap me up.
It's your world.
Baby WOMAN: Watch the cables, people! - Nasty Bitches forever! - Forever! World-premiere exclusive video.
The number-one record in the country right now, and we've got the ladies right here with us.
All the way up, all the way up Yeah, I'm all the way up Nothing can stop me, I'm all the way up ALL: We're the Nasty Bitches.
Welcome to our crib.
RED CARPET REPORTER: records sold.
"Nasty Girl" up for two VMAs, but any response to being banned from "Saturday Night Live"? Uh, yeah, that George Bush is still an [bleep.]
! I'm all the way up Shorty, what you want? I got what you need Butter Pecan.
From the hood to Hollywood.
PAPARAZZI: Why'd you walk off stage? - What's the beef? - Are the Nasty Bitches done? Yes.
I'm all the way up, henh All the way up [Moaning.]
Excuse me? Excuse me! [Alarm chirps.]
Sorry.
This is my van.
Oh, snap! Is that That's you! Baby, she's famous! My bro had her poster on the wall.
Her? Really? What happened? Rude.
What, TLC's not getting back together? Oh, you got me confused with somebody else.
You stupid.
You think TLC be shopping for prune juice in some dirty-ass sweats? Ugh.
Have a wonderful day.
WOMAN: Boy, you stupid.
Music make you lose control Let's go, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey I've got a cute face, chubby waist Thick legs, in shape Rump shakin' both ways - Make you do a double take - Now let's go, y'all Planet rocker, show stopper Flow proper, head knocker Beat scholar, tail dropper Do my thang, mother My Rolls-Royce, Lamborghini - Blue Medina always beamin' - [Exhales deeply.]
JEFF: Oh, yes.
Oh, yes.
Yes.
Oh, you are the queen! Ohh! Oh! Oh, my God.
[Toy squeaks.]
[Woman screams.]
What - You said she was gone all morning! - Oh! - What are you wearing? - [Scoffs.]
I am, like, genuinely sorry.
I don't even like condoms, but I made him wear one every time out of the deep respect I have for you and your amazing family.
- What is wrong with you?! - Nothing.
[Stammers.]
Everything.
I - I don't know.
- A white girl?! I'm 1/8th Peruvian.
I bought this for you.
I look like a clown because two fools thought I was too disgusting to be TLC.
- If I may - No.
I think you look fantastic.
Really? Yes.
Stunning.
There's nothing more attractive than mature beauty.
I'm sorry.
I know I messed up, and I don't know what to say.
I ju Please, say something.
- [Sighs.]
- Yell at me, hit me.
I'm an asshole! Bree.
Babe, I'm sorry.
I gave up everything.
For you.
[Sighs.]
[Urinating.]
[Beep.]
Okay.
[Beeping.]
[Sighs.]
Crap.
[Door opens.]
Oh.
I thought today for sure.
Did we miss the window? Maybe.
I-I don't know.
You disappointed? Not at all.
This is all part of God's plan.
I know you believe that.
Come here.
I love you.
However this journey ends up is fine.
Because it's ours.
You deserve the best.
You are the best.
What is it? Nothing.
I love you.
That's all.
- [Door closes.]
- Hey.
Guess who brought lemon cookies.
Ah! You're amazing.
Darren loves these.
Is he home? Bowling league.
Championship.
You look nice.
Thank you.
Everything all right? I called you last night.
You didn't answer.
[Exhales sharply.]
I'm good.
I know what you're dealing with.
You know I'm here for you, right? [Chuckles.]
[Chuckles.]
[Gasps.]
I couldn't do it.
I couldn't tell Darren.
I know I said I would, and I had a plan, but I couldn't.
How far are you gonna take this before you do something you can't go back on? I am married.
I'm Catholic.
I'm also the daughter of a deacon who literally prayed over kids he thought might be gay.
Do you love me? Of course I do.
This is hard for me.
It is difficult to break someone's heart, but is this easier? Pretending to be someone you're not? No.
But I'm used to it.
And I respect your struggle, but I have got to live out in the open with the person I love.
Tina, we'll figure it out.
I've already figured it out, Jill.
It's your turn.
Tina.
- [Door opens, closes.]
- [Sighs.]
[Laughter, indistinct conversations.]
Hey, Ma.
It's been a minute.
It's been a year.
Why you gotta show up today? Can I speak to my daughter, please? Jojo! JOJO: Coming! You can't keep doing this to her.
Look, I'm doing the best that I can.
Happy birthday.
I haven't seen you in over a year.
- You gonna let me in? - No.
- I'm your mother.
- No, you're someone who pops in every once in a while with a lame gift and an excuse as to why she is never around.
Being on the road is not easy for me, either, Jojo.
It's always about you, isn't it? When I get past my issues and I really think about who you are, it makes me sad, 'cause I see someone still chasing the fame they lost 20 years ago, someone so reckless with her life, she doesn't even know who my father is.
I hope you find what it is that you're looking for.
CHARLES: Dana, I'm here to discuss yet another unjust killing of a Black man by law enforcement, and as a member of the news media, the words you use matter.
[Slurring.]
Wait.
This is on me? Racism? All a hundred and something years it's been happening? Look.
All lives matter.
Why is that controversial? I shoot straight.
I call them criminals when they commit crimes.
I call them thugs when they act thuggish.
And when Blacks act ignorant, I call them Never again will this woman work in this town.
I am totally appalled.
This is a major problem.
Dana is our top-rated host.
Because she's the last of the originals.
But someone has to look our viewers in the eye on Monday and apologize a woman of color, me, and I will make America fall in love with me.
It's what I do.
Right.
Get us out of this mess.
One more thing.
We've been negotiating my contract for months It's done.
Whatever you want.
Okay.
Now I want - More potatoes, honey? - Yes, please.
Thank you.
Um [Clears throat.]
Guys, did we say "thank you" to Mommy for this amazing dinner? ALL: Thank you.
So, how was school? School was good? Everybody have a good day? Princess? You have a good day? - Yeah.
I drew a giraffe.
- I had a pretty good day.
Yeah? What'd you make? Okay.
You had a quiz today? You had a good day? Good day? [Voices overlapping.]
JEFF: Ohh! Oh! Oh, you are the queen! - [Chair legs scrape.]
- CHILD: What's wrong? [Door slams.]
[Shouts.]
[Groans.]
- [Engine starts.]
- God.
Make room for this hottie, my picture on the TV P.
Sex made him run up his check, get up his jet Big flex, let a diamond baguette float up her neck Butter Pecan, mami, perro, un perro A dog, all she want is a boss, y monedero Jill Da Thrill - [Fart.]
- [Sighs.]
[Snoring.]
[Cellphone vibrating.]
[Chuckles.]
- [Beep.]
- Bree? Yeah, it's Bree.
Listen.
Turn the radio on.
You gonna feel a difference when you creep into nasty world I'ma make you really wanna be with a nasty girl RADIO DJ: Zoom, zoom, zoom, that was "Nasty Girl," the '90s chart-topper from the former queens of hip-hop.
Why did they break up, and where are they at? Zah-zah-zah.
A nasty girl - [Car alarm chirps.]
- Hey.
[Siren wails in distance.]
Long time.
That's what happens when you tell someone you love them and they break your heart.
You don't talk to them for a long time.
- You look great.
- I know.
What do you want? How 'bout we get the band back together? Why the hell would I do that? 'Cause we owe them.
You know what we did.
[Door closes.]
Yo! Yo! - [Chuckles.]
- Oh, man.
Ooh! - BOTH: Ehh! - [Fingers snap.]
Can you believe it's been 20 years since we imploded on that stage in San Diego? Mnh.
Mnh-mnh.
But it is really good to see your face.
I know.
You bitches! - ALL: Ooh! - [Fingers snap.]
Girl, what you been up to? Oh, I'm down in Nashville, finally expressing myself musically the way I've always wanted to, and, you know, people are responding.
- Ladies! - Ooh.
You look incredible.
Are you in professional hair and makeup right now? What a tremendous compliment.
[Chuckles.]
[DMX's "Ruff Ryders' Anthem" plays.]
Unh Please.
Please don't.
We are too old for this.
What's up - Bitch! - Aah! Stop, drop Get out of my face! Get off of me! - You get off of me! - Don't put your hands on me! Get off! Get off me, Eric! You mad? Still jealous? Of what?! Your fake J-Lo ass?! Look, everybody shut up right now before I put you both in a timeout, and you can forget about iPads! - What? - Habit.
You flew to L.
A.
to finish a fight from 20 years ago? [Scoffs.]
I'm sorry.
That's ridiculous.
- It is.
- [Chuckles.]
Listen, yo.
Y'all here, which means you heard the song.
Now, since it dropped, everyone been asking about y'all.
Lil Muffin's my artist.
She's closing out the BET Awards this Sunday.
I want y'all to perform with her.
What? I'm a mom.
I don't rap anymore.
Well, that's a 50K haul for each of you.
- [Door opens.]
- Konnichi wa, lil babies! Okay, dis gotta be quick fast, okay? 'Cause I got a Japanese lesson in 10.
Bitches want me to be a one-trick pony, but I'ma be one of dem ponies with, like, a 40-inch rainbow weave and a bedazzled horn comin' out my head.
A-A unicorn? Whatever.
Yes.
Dem.
Now, I ain't never heard of no Nappy "Nasty.
" Okay.
E-Roc played the track, and I was like, "What I'm 'posed to do wit dat?" He was like, "Trust.
" [Chuckles.]
20 mil on YouTube now.
I am straight chop stickin' crow! I understand nothing.
We are not a sideshow.
You're not a show at all anymore.
It's not 1999, when you had your one big album.
Now you're [scoffs.]
whatever you are.
Muffin has things to do.
If you're in, great.
If not, this was just a favor for Eric.
Sayonara, lil babies.
I see some things haven't changed.
Just a bunch of straight men shaping the image of a young, impressionable artist.
Look.
Whatever.
I got five kids and a husband out of work.
I could use that money.
I am still active in my parish.
There are things I can't say anymore.
It's one night.
Splash some holy water on that ass and keep it movin'.
Plus, we get to hang for a week and forget about all the crap going on back home.
Okay.
Fine.
For you.
Well, I'm in.
I want an audience again.
- Yes! - But we have way too much history to just hop back on stage - like the Brady Bunch.
- Oh, here we go.
Valeria needs to apologize.
What? A fistful of weave wasn't enough? Look, you're the reason we broke up! You used us, and you rode my talent to everything you have now.
You want me to apologize? You want me to kiss the ring? Bow down to your effortless brilliance? It's a start.
You are a stubborn egomaniac.
You hate that I have the fame that your thirsty ass is still chasing.
I came here because sometimes I feel guilty that I'm the only one that went on to have any real success.
Yo! V, come on! No.
She crazy, and this? It's beneath me.
Look.
Valeria hasn't changed.
Neither have you.
And, sadly, the beef all boils down to Eric.
You had a thing for him, he wasn't checking for you, and V landed him.
She was the least talented and now somehow the most famous.
I was the glue.
I had to be.
Bree was always buried under three dudes.
They were buried under me.
And Jill was always bitter about something, and that was before you started doing blow every night.
- Yo.
What are we doing, huh? - Mnh.
I got five kids at home, and I am not at home.
I'm at a bar, kickin' it with two of my oldest friends.
Can we please cheers to that? - Yes.
- Yeah.
Cheers to three women from Queens who stood on top of the world for a hot minute.
Mm-hmm.
Mmm.
Can I tell you guys something? I have to tell you something.
I'm gonna tell you something.
- Do you have something to tell us? - I think she has something to tell us.
[Sighs.]
I walked in on my husband "instructing" one of his students.
- With his - Penis.
Oh, not the penis.
- Does he still have it? - What? - His - Penis.
Yes.
Oh.
You really have changed.
Look.
Every chick thinks they'd walk.
Beyoncé didn't leave.
Hillary didn't leave.
And why not? Why don't we leave? It's because we sacrifice out of love, and when you sacrifice so much, how the hell you gonna walk away? We got five kids.
I don't have friends.
I have other moms who come over and talk at me about hand creams and preschools, but they are not friends.
I thought I had everything.
But I can only blame myself.
I chose this.
Yo, remember when you used to date Ja Rule? - Oh, girl.
- We caught dude outside of Limelight making out with Foxy.
You didn't blame yourself.
You didn't sulk.
- You set his Ducati on fire.
- Sure did.
Yeah, but Jeff drives a Prius, and it's in both of our names, and we tried hard.
Like, we had to get a loan, 'cause I got the Okay, well, I think what Naomi's trying to say is that you need to find Professor Sex.
You need to find the fierce woman you used to be.
For real.
Find her and cut that mother Forget about his penis.
- Ooh.
- Oh, my God.
- Wait.
- Too fast.
Oh, I love you guys.
I really needed that.
All right.
I'm gonna go call my husband.
Ooh, and I'm gonna fall asleep with a bag of Cool Ranch Doritos on my chest.
[Laughs.]
Buy me a drink.
[Chuckles.]
You still doing music? Everybody wants Xplicit Lyrics.
They don't want Naomi.
You know, I called.
- You never called back.
- You did me dirty.
You had a baby with somebody else.
You chose Valeria.
I was just the secret chick.
I was young.
You know V.
She She a lightning bolt.
You know it's dangerous, but you gotta look.
Whatever.
I I-It didn't work out with her, either.
All right.
Look.
I'm just gonna go.
No, no.
Wait.
It's good to see you.
Why'd you do all this? You know, I'm getting older.
Married twice, divorced twice.
No kids.
Rich but broke.
Nothing's all good or all bad anymore.
Nothing's pure.
It's just life.
Y'all's my first big act.
Before we messed it all up, we we had something good and pure.
Not just the group.
Me and you.
Give me a reason to love you Guess I'm chasing that feeling.
- You're drunk.
- Very.
Give me a reason But am I lying? To believe Look.
I leave in 12 hours.
Let's drink and pretend like the last 20 years never happened.
I'm down with that.
I just wanna be a woman Now, are we gonna take these drinks to my room I just wanna be a woman or do you wanna keep talking about your feelings? [Remy Ma's "Conceited" plays.]
Yes, yes See, this ain't nuttin' that you used to Out of the ordinary and usual You gotta have the mind of state like I'm so great - I was up all night working on - You mind explaining? I put my mug down.
In front of Dana.
You're gonna fire me because you think I poisoned my co-host with a racist elixir? Get ready for court! Is that what you want? Hmm? For us to hire investigators to really dig into this? We can do that, or you can quietly step down and we all move on from this nightmare.
[Groans.]
[Wheels rolling.]
[Chuckles.]
Mini-bar? Oh, tell me how something so small can inflict so much pain.
Look, we're not performing, but the dumbest thing we ever did was throw away friendships that most people never have.
That's the truth.
I'm gonna call you guys, and you better answer.
Of course.
I'm in! We should do it.
The show.
I was being petty.
[Cellphone chimes.]
[Click.]
"'Shade' host Valeria Mendez stepping down after three years.
" Girl, what did you do? Wait.
You got Google Alerts on a bitch? Keep your enemies close.
You know me better than anyone.
I'm the kind of person that screws three ladies over who care about her and then turns around and asks them for a favor.
That's me.
That's what I'm doing.
You have no reason to have my back when I never really had yours, but I do know the only time I had anything resembling a family is when we were together.
We are family.
- You're still gonna need an apology.
- I'm still gonna need an apology, mm-hmm.
[Chuckles.]
I'm sorry.
I'm not Jill Da Thrill anymore.
Then we do it our way this time.
For wives, moms, and ambitious hos everywhere.
- [Chuckles.]
- Y'all are mad corny.
[Laughter.]
Come on.
[Sighs.]
- ALL: Whoo! - [Fingers snap.]
Okay, so a mom, a church lady, a washed-up musician and a disgraced daytime TV host are gonna be performing at the biggest Black awards show in the world in four days? Don't look ahead, there's stormy weather Tell me how this isn't gonna be a disaster.
Check it out, check it, check it out 'Bout to show y'all what this bitch is all about My pen game is Saddam Hussein to your brain So insane, I got him in chains like a slave Never been afraid, go against the grain like a fade A renegade, I blew up the lane like grenades Now, what you know about writin' every rhyme? Spittin' every flow and bodyin' every line? I body everybody, my body of work shines When it's all said and done, I'm the greatest of all time Young and reckless, they called us bitches and hos Only God can judge me, 'cause Heaven only knows It's harder to live right when you livin' in sin I used to think the best thing in life was chasin' men The preacher's daughter, I wanted fame and the glory But I ain't trippin', 'cause it's all part of my story Yeah, dear Father, forgive me for my sins But I'm chasin' my dreams 'cause I was born to win, unh Born to win, Jill, you so right It's a Queens thing, baby, we bad bitches for life I been around the world, 40 days, 40 nights 40 karats, 40 chains, "Miami Vice" Top of the world, top floor, penthouses Lobster and shrimp, one dinner is ten thousand Tell Xplicit we going to whenever September or November, October or December Ha, I could've ended that better, but whatever I really, really work my body Sittin' in my Bugatti Chillin' while I'm killin' hibachi, drippin' Versace Trippin', I'm a nasty girl in a nasty world Make the classiest and ratchets - Wanna take a nasty tour - Oh Was an introvert and muddy, but I'm in the dirt Now my same bullies gotta ask me for a picture first Flip a verse, did it work, still on top Went from the block to the Billboard charts - And I still won't stop - You ready? Smooth as the Land O'Lakes, you, you's a fan of me Feet cocked, I'm sittin' on the couch watchin' anime Big watch with a big chain, a big house on Biscayne I switched out that big lane My big mouth got big fame, I been that They say you can't make a ho a housewife, I beg different Gray sweats turn into lingerie in a minute Proud Mary, proud mommy, I does it all Made it through the struggle, stumbled, but never fall Look, you wanna see me humble, I want the crown Sky's the limit, can't keep a good mom down Gave my soul to you, body and all of the above In the end, you was lookin' for a teenage love I'm a queen, though, I glow, kick 'em to the side - On my Mary J.
Blige, I'm not gon' cry - Whoo! I'm a grown-ass woman, need a man, not a boy Tricks are for kids, and you could never play me like a toy After everything I gave for you Cooked for you, bathed you I was every woman, and I never would've played you But too bad, you lost the best you ever had And I'm still fly, I bring the beach to the sand - [Door opens.]
- Back up with my girls, no time to waste P.
Sex, Nasty Bitches, always in first place Can we talk? Go ahead.
They all know what you did.
I need you to come home.
Jeff, I told you.
I needed space.
I don't want to do It's cancer, Bree.
The CAT scan.
It's a tumor, and then the migraines are caused by the tumor.
It's bad.
I need surgery.
Look.
I know what I did to you.
I just I don't want to tell the kids alone.
Hey.
Did, uh Did Art finally get to sleep? No.
He did stop crying, though.
I mean, we just told him his dad might die.
So, listen, uh, I've been doing a lot of research binging "Grey's Anatomy," I mean and, apparently, depending on the location of the tumor, uh, judgment and impulse control may be impaired, so maybe and I'm just thinking here uh, that can explain why, you know, um, I did what I did.
Are you kidding me? You want me to watch a TV show so maybe I'll feel better about you pile driving one of your students in our bed, in the home that we share with our five children that I birthed?! Nah, bruh.
You couldn't even give me the satisfaction of being pissed about what you did.
You had to go and catch cancer.
Do you know how excruciatingly unfair that is? But you will not die, homie.
[Chuckles.]
Hell no.
I will do everything in my power to keep you alive because I want nothing more than the absolute pleasure of nursing you back to health and then leaving your ass! I am performing with my girls.
You don't get another piece of me.
[Groans.]
Sleep on the couch, bitch! WOMAN: Good.
Hit five, six, seven, and Nice! That's good, ladies! All right [Mumbling indistinctly.]
I used to wonder where I'd be if I had your talent.
I mean, you parlayed it.
I didn't.
You have a family.
I got a kid.
I don't have no family.
What's the story with Jojo's dad? He wasn't ready to be a dad, and he wasn't ready to be with me, so I never told him.
I guess I thought that was better than Jojo knowing and him not being around.
My mom left me at the back door of a shelter when I was 2.
I'm sure there are good foster parents, but I never met any.
When I'd get to a new home and someone would beat the hell out of me, tell me I'd never amount to anything, I told myself I'd prove them wrong.
I did, but I still go to bed every night wishing my mom would call me.
You gotta keep trying.
Because if Jojo's anything like me that's all she wants.
Can we go back to beefing, please? [Chuckles.]
- [Door opens.]
- I got my regrets, too.
[Door closes.]
I let the one relationship I knew was real slip away.
What's good? How'd it go? Amazing.
I made a reservation for dinner tonight.
We're gonna catch up, and you can't say no.
Guess I can't.
[Woman sobbing.]
[Door opens.]
Everything all right? Nah.
But who wanna hear that? Me.
I do.
All these dudes got their hands in my pocket.
Like, who they want the best for? Me or them? Them.
Honey, these dudes will pick you apart until there's nothing left but bones.
Trust.
What's your name? - You know my name.
- Your real name.
- Why you wanna know that? - Do people not ask you that? Police.
Well, I'm asking.
Lauren.
Lauren.
Don't let this persona, the fame define you, because when it's all gone, you won't know who you are.
[Exhales sharply.]
Well, damn.
Maybe I'll grow up to be like you someday.
All put together with the whole world figured out.
You don't know me.
What y'all doing tonight? Wanna shoot through the crib? I got the plug on Benihana delivery.
You know, that sounds awesome.
Cool.
Just gotta put my face on.
My bad.
D'you want? I'm good.
Okay.
[Snorts.]
Mm [Nicki Minaj's "Beez in the Trap" plays.]
Girl, you been in Montana too long, just walking up in people's cribs like you're Mr.
Rogers.
That was his house.
She probably couldn't hear us over the music.
I beez in the trap, be-beez in the trap Lauren?! What's up? It's Jill and the girls! can't tell me nothin' This what hot girls do? Oof.
JILL: Oh, my God! Oh, my God.
Damn.
Call an ambulance.
NAOMI: Please.
We need an ambulance.
A girl just overdosed.
[Monitor beeping.]
[Clears throat.]
What happened? Tell me you didn't have the most recognizable rap star in the world admitted to a county hospital.
She overdosed.
She could have died.
And you may have just killed her career.
You all right? - [Weakly.]
Yeah.
- Perfect.
Hey.
Let's get out of here.
She's not going anywhere until she's properly discharged.
Did you know she had a drug problem? She's young.
All right? People party.
Jill, you know the game.
Partying doesn't get you in the hospital.
I know.
You know I know.
This is a really dope after-school special, but we have a show.
She needs rehab.
The BET Awards is promotion for the album.
Failure to perform is breach of contract, and the label will go after every cent of her advance.
Is that money still around, or did it fly up her nose? Jill, this is business.
She is not a business! Lauren, you have to speak up.
[Exhales sharply.]
- These my people.
- CHARLIE: It's settled.
Muffin has the stage all to herself, as she should.
Nah, nah, nah, chief.
Nobody said Look, it's been real, but it's time for you to go.
Your plane tickets back to pre-menopausal obscurity will be at the hotel.
- Turn the other cheek.
- What? You slapped him? Straight knocked homeboy out.
I mean, it'd be funny if he wasn't the dude who gave us this opportunity.
Forget him.
Lauren needs us.
I didn't know that girl till a few days ago.
She's alive.
The only thing that's gone now is our shot.
- Naomi, really? - I mean, seriously, is your life so perfect now that you got time to fix other people's? You don't know what you're talking about.
Some of us don't have the perfect house - or the perfect husband - Stop.
with a stomach full of under-seasoned potatoes au gratin or whatever else you folks eat in Montana.
Shut the hell up.
- Shut me up.
- Ladies! You know, you should focus a little less on fame and a little more on that kid you abandoned.
Ugh! I needed this.
Are y'all two ever out for anyone but yourself? Yes.
I agreed to do the show because my career blew up in my face, but then I was in a cypher again with you ladies, and I felt it the magic we had on that boat.
I got to take my mask off for a few days, and I am scared as hell of having to put it back on again.
I'm gay.
I am gay! [Exhales sharply.]
That must've felt really good.
Ooh, yes, Lord, it did.
Yes, and I am madly in love with someone else.
I mean, Tina is the first person who made me feel like I could be honest with myself, honest with the world.
[Sighs.]
My husband is amazing.
I mean, he saw something in me when no one else should have.
He doesn't deserve this.
- You deserve to be happy.
- Yeah.
[Breathes deeply.]
I'm sorry.
All right.
Stand up.
Okay.
We don't need a crowd, and we don't need a stage.
We need each other.
Okay? [Door opens.]
Hi.
I just came to say thank you.
I'm not used to people looking out for me, so Listen, I have to perform tomorrow, but I'm not doing the show without you guys.
[Guitar strumming.]
It's not easy to be honest, but I'm willing 'Cause I know you need it more than anything I have I hope you hear me now I hope you hear me now I've done a lot of things I hate myself for But I know you must Hate me more But hear me [Audience cheering.]
LIL MUFFIN: Thank you for this opportunity.
It's always been a dream to close the BET Awards, so thank you so much.
I don't want to be afraid no more I just want to love you best I can And in return, I tried to understand All of the hurt I caused when I was lost and weak - I hope that you hear me now - We need to talk.
Now, I didn't know nothing about the Nasty Bitches, but now I'm grateful that I do.
They've earned the spotlight all to themselves, and I want to give them that, because I would not be here without them.
- What the hell is going on? - Nothing you can stop.
Ha-ha! All of the hurt I caused When I was lost and weak, yeah I hope that you hear me [Helicopter blades whirring.]
[Cheers and applause.]
Take it off! Poom, poom, nani, nani my nani dripped in gold Zoom, zoom in Ferraris Hold up, hold up, hold up.
I got a question.
Are my ladies in the building tonight?! [Cheers and applause.]
Any moms in the building tonight, holding it down, still sexy, don't need no man? - [Cheers and applause.]
- That's right.
I used to be a Nasty Bitch.
Tonight? I'm a queen! [Cheers and applause.]
Poom, poom, nani, nani, my nani dripped in gold Zoom, zoom in Ferraris, fly me around the globe, huh Nasty by nature, treacherous in them hills It's P.
Sex, I make 'em pay a couple of bills It's a stick-up, stick up On the pole, watch this bad gal Lift up, lift up, and drop, drop it like it's hot Give it to you good, make you rise to the top, huh Sassy, intelligent, knock 'em out the box Queen chick, I'm the baddest dream bitch, huh Supreme chick you wanna be seen with Face so pretty, baby body full of curves If he can't handle the speed, I kick him to the curb Now you know you wanna be with a nasty girl Know you wanna spend time in my nasty world Gimme what I need, and I'll be your nasty girl Your nasty girl, your nasty girl Poom, poom, nani, nani, your body looking delicious Power couple, you always handle your business Played the shy role for too long, let's face it Boss bitches only, ain't nothing about me basic When I'm next to him thinkin' about you Wanna tell him so bad, I know you want that, too 'Cause he deserves better than all the lyin' and the hidin' Smilin' in his face, when in the meanwhile I'm so blessed, no more stress, letting you know This is us forever, I ain't lettin' you go Yeah, I never knew I would end up kissing a girl But thanks to you, now I can tell the whole world Now, you know you wanna be with a nasty girl Know you wanna spend time in my nasty world Gimme what I need, and I'll be your nasty girl Your nasty girl, your nasty girl Poom, poom, nani, nani, it's big mami Doin' tricks like Ducatis in a big body Butter Pecan, her majesty, queens get the money My legacy written This royal bitch stay hungry Nasty women, we about nothing but winnin' It's money over men, you never catchin' the slippin' I could do the shoppin' myself with blank checks You pull up with the Rolls-Royce I pull up with the jet I pull up with the princess cuts and the baguettes I pull up with the Louis luggage, I made it a set Get what I want and never think about the cost Nasty bitch? Nah You can call me the boss Now, you know you wanna be with a nasty girl Know you wanna spend time in my nasty world Gimme what I need, and I'll be your nasty girl Your nasty girl, your nasty girl This is embarrassin' Mass murder, harassment, I'm the advocate No one can fathom this Nasty Bitch flow with the arrogance Lyrical, cynical, savage, visuals paint scriptures And my mystique is Mona Lisa in faded pictures I made a hit list, I'm a queen, young, Black and gifted A fashion misfit, this ain't pretty dresses and lashes This is Queens madness, rep my borough thorough as men And when it comes to the paper They wanna borrow my pen Guess the motto was something vicious When you think of these bitches Said you the best with it Until I stepped to your business Put my name on the body, disappear in the ghost Pop bottles with my girls, we run the world, ho Now, you know you wanna be with a nasty girl Know you wanna spend time in my nasty world Gimme what I need, and I'll be your nasty girl Your nasty girl, your nasty girl Now, you know you wanna be with a nasty girl Know you wanna spend time in my nasty world Gimme what I need, and I'll be your nasty girl Your nasty girl, your nasty girl - [Song ends.]
- [Cheers and applause.]
- Whoo! - Yes! [Rhythmic clapping.]
Whoo! Yes! Oh, my God.
You did it, Jill.
You are amazing! Thank you.
Nasty Bitches forever! [All cheering.]
So, a mom, a washed-up musician, a disgraced daytime TV host, a lesbian church lady, and a young rapper fresh out of rehab are going on a world tour? Yeah.
Cool.
I'm coming out