School of Thrones (2013) s01e01 Episode Script
Prom Night Is Coming
It isn't easy being a Stark.
If freshman Sansa knew sophomore Sansa was gonna fall for a Lannister, she'd have suffocated herself.
In a puppy avalanche.
Whoa, Sansa, eyes front.
You know what Father says about Lannisters.
Yeah, yeah, it's always about daddy, isn't it, Robb? This again.
- Oh, hey, watch out! - Oh, that's cold, sis.
A little respect? How about a little mind your own business? - Yo, eyes front! - Jon, I got it covered.
Yeah, I heard him.
- Just saying.
- You know you were adopted, Jon.
Hey.
You're that foreign exchange student.
- Dany Targaryen.
- Jon Snow.
You have a thing for dragons, huh? Sorry, new girl, but you should hear this now.
We can never be friends.
The cliques of Westeros Valley High aren't allowed to intermingle.
High school politics.
Wiggle what? - Cliques? - Yeah, cliques, you know.
- Stark - Lannister Baratheon Greyjoy! And uh Targaryen, apparently.
We can't be that different, right? I mean, we're young, we're hormonal, we all live in the shade of the dragons and We're actually more of a dog family.
And when we get to know each other we'll realize all the wonderful things we have in common.
We are Starks.
Our way is the vintage way.
And prom night is coming.
Have you embraced the Lord of Light as your personal saviour? Prom night is dark and full of terrors.
A vote for Stannis is a vote for R'hllor! Loras! Swing by the library Friday night, we'll be serving non-alcoholic punch! Sorry, dorks, the cool kids already have plans.
- What's up, big bro? - Renly, you dick! You dare throw a party the same night as mine! I know, douche move.
Don't be mad.
I just find it impossible to take you seriously.
You're such a cute little guy.
- I told you to stop saying that.
- Oh, don't worry, you'll grow out of it.
He's just jealous because you're so totally adorable.
I'm not adorable! I'm Stannis! - Aw.
- Hehehe.
What can I say? Cute is out.
No one wants you for their prom king, bro-bro.
You've seen this kind of thing before? What's the deal with a little brother-on-brother? Kind of hot.
This is serious business, ginger Stark.
Nice weave, by the way.
I spent my life transferring from school to school: prep, private, public They've all collapsed on out of control prom nights.
I cannot witness that again.
I must conquer the school! With flame! What, what now? Whoo, are you a pyromaniac? Hey, Joffrey's coming! Come on, dog, let's pay the security guards to taze the poor kids.
Holla, cutie! Ain't you that Stark sister? San-San-Sansa Mmm, sexy name.
Know who I am? Joffrey Lannister The principal's son and last year's prom king and the Student Body president and the God's - one and only flawless creation and I have a poster of you - Shh, shh, shh! Here's the dibby-dub-dib-dub-dealio.
.
The Joff wants to stay prom king And with the right prom queen he can rule the school forevs, know what I mean? Cool In dark times like these, we outcasts have to stick together.
If freshman Sansa knew sophomore Sansa was gonna fall for a Lannister, she'd have suffocated herself.
In a puppy avalanche.
Whoa, Sansa, eyes front.
You know what Father says about Lannisters.
Yeah, yeah, it's always about daddy, isn't it, Robb? This again.
- Oh, hey, watch out! - Oh, that's cold, sis.
A little respect? How about a little mind your own business? - Yo, eyes front! - Jon, I got it covered.
Yeah, I heard him.
- Just saying.
- You know you were adopted, Jon.
Hey.
You're that foreign exchange student.
- Dany Targaryen.
- Jon Snow.
You have a thing for dragons, huh? Sorry, new girl, but you should hear this now.
We can never be friends.
The cliques of Westeros Valley High aren't allowed to intermingle.
High school politics.
Wiggle what? - Cliques? - Yeah, cliques, you know.
- Stark - Lannister Baratheon Greyjoy! And uh Targaryen, apparently.
We can't be that different, right? I mean, we're young, we're hormonal, we all live in the shade of the dragons and We're actually more of a dog family.
And when we get to know each other we'll realize all the wonderful things we have in common.
We are Starks.
Our way is the vintage way.
And prom night is coming.
Have you embraced the Lord of Light as your personal saviour? Prom night is dark and full of terrors.
A vote for Stannis is a vote for R'hllor! Loras! Swing by the library Friday night, we'll be serving non-alcoholic punch! Sorry, dorks, the cool kids already have plans.
- What's up, big bro? - Renly, you dick! You dare throw a party the same night as mine! I know, douche move.
Don't be mad.
I just find it impossible to take you seriously.
You're such a cute little guy.
- I told you to stop saying that.
- Oh, don't worry, you'll grow out of it.
He's just jealous because you're so totally adorable.
I'm not adorable! I'm Stannis! - Aw.
- Hehehe.
What can I say? Cute is out.
No one wants you for their prom king, bro-bro.
You've seen this kind of thing before? What's the deal with a little brother-on-brother? Kind of hot.
This is serious business, ginger Stark.
Nice weave, by the way.
I spent my life transferring from school to school: prep, private, public They've all collapsed on out of control prom nights.
I cannot witness that again.
I must conquer the school! With flame! What, what now? Whoo, are you a pyromaniac? Hey, Joffrey's coming! Come on, dog, let's pay the security guards to taze the poor kids.
Holla, cutie! Ain't you that Stark sister? San-San-Sansa Mmm, sexy name.
Know who I am? Joffrey Lannister The principal's son and last year's prom king and the Student Body president and the God's - one and only flawless creation and I have a poster of you - Shh, shh, shh! Here's the dibby-dub-dib-dub-dealio.
.
The Joff wants to stay prom king And with the right prom queen he can rule the school forevs, know what I mean? Cool In dark times like these, we outcasts have to stick together.