She-Wolf of London (1990) s01e01 Episode Script

(PITAK PANTING) (SCREAMING) No! Pitak! (SPEAKING FOREIGN LANGUAGE) Come on, boy! Quick, take the boy.
Come on take, take.
Where are the children? The children, take the children, quick! And the horses.
Take the horses.
Hurry up! Move them, move them.
Hurry up, you.
(ROARING) (ROARING) RANDl: " When I saw the dismembered body "lying in pieces on the floor in the dappled moonlight, "it was easy to imagine those body parts taking on lives of their own.
"Did that hand move? "Was it crawling across the floor behind her, "making its way up the back of her chair? "Were those dismembered fingers about to grip her exposed throat" God! Breakfast.
Sorry.
It's okay.
Ooh! Did you draw these? Uh-huh.
Bit of a monster in you, isn't there? I'll just have the corn flakes, please.
Oh, sorry.
We're all out of cereal.
How about deviled kidneys? Oh, I don't eat red meat.
Oh, it's cow flesh or nothing.
Well, any vegetables in there? Hmm, of a sort.
Go ahead, poke about.
I'm sure you'll find something to your liking.
Ooh, is this yours? I've got a Stephen King in my bag.
Ah, no thanks, this is a textbook written by the master of parapsychology-busting himself.
Very tweedy, white-haired professor type stuff.
I'm going to London to study with him.
Lovely.
Yeah.
PILO T O VER PA: Good morning, ladies and gentlemen.
This is Captain Reynolds again.
It seems our tremors have settled down.
We are about one hour from our arrival in London.
The weather is sunny Yuck! (EXCLAIMS) Whoops, love.
Mind that.
Sorry.
(DOOR OPENING) IAN: I detect poltergeist activity.
Sorry, I'm jet-lagged.
Well, please find a seat, Miss Lagged.
(ALL LAUGHING) Thank you.
It wasn't that funny.
Now settle down while I dredge up another one of my stultifying lectures.
Man needs his myths, his legends, and his monsters.
Even the most primitive civilizations have God-based religions to explain the origins of life and its orders.
It would appear that man and woman needs the angel on one shoulder to counter the devil on the other.
It's a way perhaps not only to avoid full responsibility for one's actions and failures, but to exercise the imagination as well.
From devils to monster movie icons, society has needed its beasts to keep the status quo and to win American football scholarships.
(LAUGHS) (CLEARS THROAT) Dr.
Matheson! Excuse me, Dr.
Matheson.
Ah, the poltergeist.
Hi, I'm Randi.
Randi Wallace.
And I'm flattered.
Isn't Wallace a rather unusual name for a woman? Sorry? You're American? Yeah.
LA.
Los Angeles.
I should probably warn you, Miss Wallace, that over here, "randy" usually means Oh, how can I put this delicately? Erotically charged.
Oh, God.
You mean, like " horny"? I'm afraid so.
(LAUGHS) I'm sorry.
Oops.
No need to apologize.
Here, let me help you.
You're working on your master's thesis? Yeah, exactly.
I'm seeking to explain folk legends and myths through terms of Freudian psychological need.
Debunking through a motivational psychogenic analysis and your work and support in this field is, it's important.
Well, a psychogenic-based debunking is a fairly general approach.
My work, while theoretical, is more fundamentally rooted in the Cartesian dualistic patterns of mythology in a sociological context.
Ah.
Hmm.
Now, let me just give the Queen's English a simple workout.
You know, " important" usually means to me dull, stodgy and grey.
But, I'll do my best to accept the compliment.
That's how I meant it.
Really.
Well, thank you.
Tell me, are you staying on campus? Yes.
Well, I mean, I was, but I'm having some problems with the residency requirements.
I'm working on getting something together now, though.
Perhaps I can help you.
My parents run a B&B not too far away.
Now, I'm certain they'd love the idea of a full-time student boarder.
It's clean, it's a block away from the tube, and the price is right.
I'm visiting there for dinner tonight, if you'd like me to introduce you.
Wow! That would be great! I mean, if it's not too much trouble or anything.
Aren't you worth it? I think I'm gonna like England.
(BIG BAND MUSIC PLAYING) How do you intend to illustrate your thesis? Well, I want to go to where the legends originate, try to find clinical and psychological reasons for the development.
First, I'm going ghost-hunting on the moors, write down my impressions.
Be careful.
The moors can be dangerous.
Don't go out there alone.
Because I'm a girl? Because it's dangerous.
Especially for a girl.
I'm a card-carrying member of the Sierra Club.
I've climbed Half Dome in Yosemite and I've gone backpacking with the grizzlies in Yellowstone.
I'm good at careful.
I'm sure you are.
I just don't think you should go out there by yourself.
Well, maybe I'll find a volunteer in class or something.
I'll go with you.
Just check your hormones at the door, Julian.
Well, we're just delighted to have such a scholar join our little family.
It's lovely to have another young American in the house.
Julian's from Baltimore.
Lan's brother's boy.
He's staying with us while his father's starting a new job.
Don't soft soap.
The bastard's in the nick.
The nick? IAN: The pokey.
Jail.
The evil twin, the skeleton in the family closet.
Well, it's an honor, really.
Your son's been quite an inspiration.
I've read all his books.
It's how I got interested in mythology in the first place.
You must be very proud.
Oh, we are very proud.
We never believed our boy would grow up to be a professor, of all things.
He was a terrible student, after all, and a naughty little boy.
Always reading those gruesome monster books.
Academic research, Mother.
You still got any? I never went to university, and I've done all right.
A nice home and a damned fine pension check signed by the Prime Minister.
Dad was in the guards, you know, guarding the palace.
He looked so handsome in his bearskin.
Bearskin? Hat, you know, dear.
And no tourist could ever make him crack so much as a smile.
Perfect job.
He never laughed in his life.
Millions tried.
And it put a roof over your bleeding head.
If you'd like me to go on the dole, just you say the word.
IAN: Dad, we have a guest.
It's okay.
It reminds me of home.
No wonder you left.
Aunt Elsa! PARROT: Eat me! That was a respectable parrot before you came! Ha! Ha! Ha! (KNOCKING ON DOOR) Ah! Is everything all right? It's great, perfect! Here.
It's sort of a welcome gift.
Thank you.
It's inscribed.
Well (CHUCKLES) Oh! What does it say? (EXCLAIMS) "With all my best wishes and highest hopes.
Dr.
Lan Matheson.
" So formal, Doctor.
Well, I'll change it to Professor.
No, no.
I love it, thank you.
I really do want you to be careful in your research, Miss Wallace.
That's the point.
Not to be careful.
To really go out there and get into this stuff, you know, smash the barrier between researcher and subject.
Well, that's what libraries are for.
I know.
I know.
But I want to go beyond book knowledge.
I want, I want grass stains on my bibliography, not reference books.
Like mine, you mean? No, your books are great.
It's just I wanna dig into it, you know, not play so dainty.
Dainty? Make it real first-person stuff.
Well, good luck.
Oh, I don't mean that your books aren't fantastic.
They are, really! It's just, I want to go all the way.
Yes.
Well, I'm here to offer you all the encouragement you need.
Any advice for my endeavor? A good scientist excels in three things.
Research, research, and research.
Just do it till you prove it.
Thanks.
You don't know how much this all means to me.
Teacher's pet.
Good night, Miss Wallace.
Good night, Dr.
Matheson.
Lan.
(WIND HOWLING) Out on the moors, the night is filled with sound.
No wonder unsophisticated minds conjured up monsters and demons from the ghost-like hoot of the owl, the banshee wail of the gusty wind, the Ionely barking of a dog Cute, dog (CRICKETS CHIRPING) (CHUCKLES) Even the eerie chirping of the crickets.
Little bunny.
(SIGHS) Alone in the elements, the mind plays tricks on you.
Everything is exaggerated.
(GROWLING) Woodland animals become raging beasts.
(SHRIEKS) But After centuries of ghosts, goblins and ghoulies, one fact obviously remains The beast is in the mind.
(SCREAMS) (GASPS) (SNORTING) (SCREAMING) No! No! No! No! (SCREAMING) Here she comes now.
Miss Wallace.
Randi.
It's lan Matheson.
Oh, God.
Is it bad? IAN: It's quite nice, actually.
Don't look at me.
Stevens is a good man, does a good job.
Lan.
This is not what I meant by research, Miss Wallace.
(PANTING) Jesus! It bit me! The teeth! Calm down.
You're going to be all right.
Everything's gonna be fine.
It's my fault.
I should never have let you go out on the moors alone.
How do you feel? Huh, okay.
Not so (VOMITING) IAN: Here you are, you'll be better in no time.
I used to have a pair of shoes just like those.
RANDl: What did you do here? Mr.
Stevens had to suture some bite wounds.
Don't worry, you'll play the piano again.
Bites? Yes, it seems you came cheek to jowl with the hound of the Baskervilles.
It was a dog of some kind, only, only huge and vicious.
And I was in my tent, and there was this rabbit and then this thing just ripped through and there's teeth That's what the constable's report said.
Apparently, there have been a number of dog attacks lately.
Well, at least your wounds were clean, so there should be no residual scarring.
You're very lucky, and very foolish.
Who made that mess in the lift? It was me.
Bloody hell.
Yep.
Your reception committee is awaiting.
Here.
Whoa! Awesome, like Frankenstein! Baltimore! Did the police do a saliva test? They always do a saliva test.
You don't spit test attack dogs.
Did you ever hear of men in dog suits? Just let the young lady get some rest.
She's been through quite an ordeal.
Do you realize how many succulent young girls like you Just let her get to her room and get some rest, thank you.
get abducted every day by white slavers? Beware the wolf in sheep's clothing, I always say.
IAN: Thank you! I'll make you a nice hot cuppa, dear.
Tea and a nice scone, and you'll be a new girl.
So, was there much blood? Julian! Inquiring minds want to know.
How about a nice banana and strawberries, dear? I'm sorry.
Tell your mom the food was wonderful, but I just don't want to experience it twice, if you know what I mean.
Quite.
I suppose you wish you'd never left Los Angeles.
Well, if I wanted to be attacked by animals, I could always walk down Hollywood Boulevard.
Well, you're here now and like it or not, you're my responsibility.
You are the knight in shining armor, aren't you? Yes, but a little prone to rust, I'm afraid.
I must be off.
You go to sleep, perchance to dream.
I'll take the sleep, but give me a rain check on the nightmares.
Good night.
Good night.
(DOOR CLOSES) I do good work, and you could do a Vogue cover.
(CHUCKLING) Yeah.
Good night.
Good night.
Jesus.
(SIGHS) (DOG BARKS) (DOG WHIMPERING) (DOG WHIMPERING) (SCREECHING) What are you guys doing in here, huh? Sweet little things.
Shouldn't be in here, should you? Poor little guys.
What you doing here? Big dog.
Jeez, it's hot in here, isn't it? (MOANING) (PANTING) "Although a healer may run" (CHUCKLES) "Although a healer may run" (GROANING) (SIGHS) (SCREAMING) (SNARLING) (GROWLING) (GROWLING) (MONKEY SCREECHING) (CAT YOWLING) (GASPS) (HISSING) (RATTLING) (GASPS) (SIGHS) (GROWLS) (SCREAMS) Wait a minute.
(EXHALING) It's only a It's only a bloody animal.
(SCREAMING) (ROARS) (SCREAMS) (GROWLING) (PANTING) (GROWLS) (SCREAMING) (GROWLING) (GLASS SHATTERING) (GASPS) Randi.
Randi! RANDl: I remember this, this dog of some kind.
It was huge and vicious.
IAN: Yes, it seems you came cheek to jowl with the hound of the Baskervilles.
The hound of the Baskervilles.
Jesus! It bit me.
Calm down.
The teeth.
Don't worry, you're gonna be all right.
Everything's gonna be fine.
It bit me.
Everything's gonna be fine.
I remember this, this dog, this, this dog of some sort Jesus! It bit me.
It bit me! Calm down.
The teeth.
Don't worry you're gonna be all right.
Everything's gonna be fine.
It was huge and vicious.
It bit me, it bit me.
Everything's gonna be fine.
Tell me again.
If there was no such large animal housed in this lab, what was it, Dr.
Matheson? Dr.
Matheson? (SIGHING) Yes? I'm sorry, Inspector.
It's just that Miss Wallace was a student of mine.
Was? Her body has yet to be found.
No body, no murder.
I hope you're right, Inspector.
But how do you explain this? You say you were chased in here by a large animal.
Now this savage, let's say dog, you've never seen before.
Now, I believe that.
The paw prints are quite in evidence.
But, you tell me.
Do you really think this animal, this dog, could remove Miss Wallace's clothing? And what was she doing in here so late at night? Research.
On what, may I ask? On mythology.
Disproving the supernatural.
Disproving it? Interesting.
(MOANING) (PANTING) (GASPS) Oh, God.
(MOANS) (BREATHING HEAVILY) (CHATTERING) (GASPS) Hmm.
I'm not dreaming this, am I? No, I didn't think so.
Look, I would really appreciate it if one of you gentlemanly Englishmen would get me something to wear.
She's American.
What's your name, love? Randi (LAUGHING) Look.
Please, would you get me a towel or something? Well, Miss Randi, is this what you were looking for? Exactly.
I'm doing my thesis on myths and weird little beasts.
IAN: Yes, I promise, Inspector.
First thing tomorrow.
I'm sure that after she's had some rest, she'll be able to remember things more clearly.
Well, I hope so, Doctor.
Goodbye.
Goodbye, Miss Wallace.
I hope you feel better.
RANDl: Thank you.
(EXHALES) Randi, tell me, what do you remember? I remember chasing you down the hall and into the closet, and clawing on the doors with God, lan, I almost killed you.
Look, I'm still not sure how you know what happened to me, but I'm certain of one thing.
You are not What? A werewolf? God, if ever I wanted to believe you, it's now.
Then believe me, Randi.
Please.
The trauma you suffered on the moors has obviously caused some kind of psychogenic reaction.
What are you saying? That in my altered state, I destroyed an animal lab, and then I decided to march into the library so I could shove splinters under my fingernails? Randi, I think perhaps you should return to the States.
No way! I am not taking home some English curse.
Damn it, I know what happened last night.
It was real.
It happened to me.
And it means that everything we know is wrong.
Randi, there are no werewolves.
Prove it.
(CHUCKLES) What are you trying to say? I'm saying that I am not going home.
This disease stays until I find a cure.
Dr.
Matheson! Lan.
Look, I know this all can't logically be true.
I know, it It makes no sense, but please, you've got to help me find some sort of cure.
You know you can't explain what happened last night.
So let's So let's solve this thing together.
All right, Miss Wallace.
I'll help you.
And before the next full moon.
"Therefore, the werewolf must make a choice, "either find the creature that passed on the curse, "and sever the bloodline "or take his own life.
" IAN: Randi, I want you to go back with me to that night.
The night of the full moon.
(BREATHING HEAVILY) (MOANING) (ROARS) (MOANING) (SCREAMING) Did we learn anything? (SIGHS) Not to try that again.
(GRUNTING) Randi! Oh, come on, Randi.
(PANTING) This bloody basket isn't getting any lighter, you know.
I'm sorry.
It's just that I have to find the exact spot where I was attacked.
(IAN GRUNTING) Well, just coming out on the moors again should help you to remember.
Randi, why don't we find somewhere a little more picturesque? Come on, there's a stream back here.
No, no.
Come on.
No.
This is what I want.
Really, I don't mind eating where I was eaten, bit or whatever.
I thought I had a morbid side.
(SIGHS) Oh, come on.
My feet are almost asleep.
You can probably use the rest.
Now if you stayed still, I wouldn't have to do this.
(SIGHS) You know, I guarantee the university would not agree with this dangerous little liaison.
I'm just drawing your picture.
I had a colleague who lost his job for more than this.
(SHUSHING) I'm trying to concentrate on that aquiline nose.
(CHUCKLING) How much longer? Ah.
Just about Well, you can forget it.
Time's up! (LAUGHS) Hey, Randi, where you going? Come on.
Randi, Randi Where are you I'm not going up there.
Just follow me, follow me Randi! Here we are.
Come on.
Come on.
You can do it.
Yeah! Wait a minute, now, Randi, Randi, I hate heights.
Oh, really? All right.
Come on! It's easy! IAN: You wait till I get you.
No, get your footage.
There we go.
Randi, were you a mountain goat in some past life? (LAUGHING) Yes.
(GRUNTS) (CHUCKLES) Oh! Ow! Are you okay? I stepped on something.
I must say, love.
You are a textbook case of accident prone, aren't you? Thanks, love.
Tell me, is this how you see me? I draw what I see.
Well, I think there's more of you on this page than there is of me.
Take a look at this.
It's quite unique, isn't it? The detailing is Mid-Eastern.
It's a shame it's broken.
It would be worth much more intact.
I don't care what it's worth.
Look how it's been torn apart.
It's like someone was wearing it and it exploded off their finger.
Exploded? What are you trying to say? I'm not sure yet.
But it's something tangible.
(SHIVERING) Let's go.
Come on.
Say for one mad moment I go along with you.
Say that bloody ring belongs to the person who's responsible for your attack.
Say it was his dog.
Say it was him.
Randi, the problem you have is a psychological one.
If you can't get to grips with that It is not in my mind.
My God, lan, I'm terrified.
I killed those little animals.
I mean, next time, God knows what I'm gonna kill.
I could kill a person.
I could kill you.
I don't want to be a murderer.
I don't need that karma.
You don't even believe in karma.
Look, I don't know what I believe anymore.
You believe in the power of the logical mind, in rational thinking.
Huh! Keep talking.
Werewolves make lousy scientists.
God, I think it's gonna rain.
It'll clear up.
English weather.
What's that? You don't see many of those anymore.
That's a traveling Gypsy carnival.
I'm going over there.
Randi, I don't think that's a very good idea.
These people can be dangerous.
Randi! Randi! Come on! Randi! What are you after? I don't know, I don't know.
I'm flying on instinct here.
Instinct? And what is it telling you? That she's the one we have to talk to.
Oh, bloody hell.
What is it you seek, my child? Madame Elena.
My student, Miss Wallace, believes herself to have been bitten by a werewolf.
So we need to know if she is marked by a pentagram, the sign of the wolf.
Life is not a monster movie.
Well, take a look at this.
Where did you get this? RANDl: On the moors.
It belongs to the werewolf that attacked me, doesn't it? You must You must go now.
We are closed.
Talk to me.
If you put this curse on me, then you break it.
I did not put this curse upon you.
Then who did? Randi, come on, I think we can go home.
(STUTTERING) They're busy.
No, damn it.
You know what I'm talking about.
You know the cure.
Now, tell me.
There is no cure.
Only death.
No, there's another way.
The bloodline.
You know what I'm talking about.
Randi, please, please.
Let's go.
Let's go.
Why won't you help me? Grandmother! (HISSING) Pitak! Go! (SCREAMING) No, no.
Randi! Randi! It's him.
You idiot, he's right there.
Randi.
Randi.
Randi! I'm gonna get that bastard.
Randi, we're not going to chase some crazy kid across the countryside.
There's no time, get in.
Randi, stop this madness.
What is this? Left-hand shift? You're joking, now.
Randi! Randi! Come on.
Come on, lan, let's go.
(HORN HONKING) Ow! Pitak! Randi, this is not a stagecoach.
(SCREAMING) Whoa! Randi, this is a vintage car.
(SCREAMING) RANDl: It's him.
It's him.
IAN: Who? It's him! Who's him? The wolf.
The guy who bit me.
It's him.
(RANDI SHOUTS) (IAN SCREAMING) Stop! Stop! Stop! Stop! (SCREAMING) You have got a bloody license, haven't you? Shut up! (SCREAMING) (SCREAMING) (GROWLING) Get him, lan! Ouch! RANDl: Leave me! No! No! Come on, Randi.
Come on.
Let's move! (GROWLS) I've got to go see that Gypsy lady.
(IAN SPEAKS FOREIGN LANGUAGE) What does that mean? Gypsy for " gone.
" I got a bad feeling about this.
That it isn't over? No, it's not.
If I saw what I think I saw You saw it.
And it's for real.
And now you're free? Tomorrow's the first day of the rest of my curse.
RANDl: Mmm.
This is delicious.
Well, I guess you finally won her over to English cooking, Mum.
Mmm.
Come on.
Where are you off to? We haven't had our pudding.
Randi and I have hours of research to do tonight.
We'd better go now.
So what's wrong with you? You going through the change of life? (CLEARS THROAT) I guess so.
Too much horseradish.
Excuse me.
Good night.
Dad, what do you suppose those two are up to down in the basement? Such secrecy these days.
Bet I know.
You're too young to know.
Hmm.
I know.
And you're too old.
For anything.
PARROT: I know.
(PANTING) Hurry, lan.
Don't worry.
We won't have to do this much longer.
Inquiries from the ad are already coming in.
If werewolves are real, then everything we know is wrong.
We should soon find the key to your problem.
Great! If my students find out that I'm now trying to prove the occult They'll be proud of you.
Maybe we should hold a telethon? No! Good night, love.
See you in the morning.
All right, lan, what's this research all about? Love, Auntie.
Pure animal magnetism.