The Adventures of Jimmy Neutron, Boy Genius (2002) s01e01 Episode Script

1
Gotta Blast!
From here to the stars
for my candy bars ♪
Rides a kid with a knack
for invention ♪
( gasps )
With a super-powered mind,
a mechanical canine ♪
( barks )
He rescues the day
from sure destruction ♪
Help!
This is the theme song ♪
( screams )
For Jimmy Neutron. ♪
( mechanical whirring )
( barking )
( yells )
U.S. DEPARTMENT OF EDUCATION
and MTV TELEVISION NETWORKS
( panting )
Bow-wow-wow, ruff.
( yelping )
Ah, it's a beautiful night
for a stroll, eh, Carl?
Oh, yeah,
sure is, Jimmy.
Um, listen, why
am I wearing
a crash helmet
and a parachute?
Because you get to test
the new neutron
catastrophic simulation
escape system.
Really? Oh, thanks a lot, Jimmy.
Now, when you say the word
"catastrophic"
W-well, it's catastrophic
simulation
Carl,
it's different.
Oh
I don't get it.
Just press that button
and all your questions
will be answered.
Hey, that guy
kind of looks like me.
( screams )
( laughs )
Hey, Carl, Carl,
you left your pants
Pants-- oh, no!
( engine hissing )
I got to go home
and pick up my room
before my mom sees that I
James Isaac Neutron,
how many times have I told you
to pick up
your pants?
Well, I know just the dog
who can answer that, Mom.
( barks )
Goddard, access maternal
reprimand data
cross-reference, pants.
Jimmy, pick up your pants,
please.
Uh, Jimmy, pick up your pants.
Pick up your pants.
pants.
Jimmy
Jimmy
Jimmy
pick 'em up.
Jimmy!
pick up
pick up
pick up
Jimmy!..
your pants! ♪
I rest my case.
Okay, no more Mrs. Nice Mom.
( screaming )
Uh hi,
Mrs. Neutron.
I was just floating by,
and I thought I'd drop in.
Hello, Carl.
You, young man,
are going to be punished.
You will not be going to the
movies with your friends
after school tomorrow.
Aw, but Mom! It's the new
science-fiction kung-fu
action-buddy comedy sequel
to last summer's box office
smash based on an old TV show
we've never heard of--
I have to see it!
Sorry, Jimmy.
Mom, I'll be the only kid
in the world who doesn't see it.
Think of all the pop culture
references
I'll never understand.
I'll be an outcast, a loner.
I'll I'll be shunned
from civilized society.
( sad music plays )
"Please, no!"
"It's not my fault!"
"My mom just wouldn't let me
go to the movies!"
I'm going
to miss him.
You have to learn
to pick up your pants.
Remember, pants
don't pick themselves up.
( thinking ):
"Pants don't pick
themselves up."
"Pants don't pick
themselves up."
"Pants don't pick
themselves up."
Carl, I think this
is the beginning
of a beautiful experiment.
( cracking )
( screams )
JIMMY:
With a nanochip
installed in my pants
they'll put themselves away.
Mmm, nanochips.
Wait, are those
the spicy ranch kind?
My mom says
I can't eat those
because the hiatal hernia
I have is exacerbated by
No, no, no
nanochips are microscopic
supercomputers
capable of artificial
intelligence.
Oh why don't you just pick up
your pants
and hang them up yours?
Oh, Carl, I'm a scientist.
I have more important things
to do than pick up pants.
Oh, but Jimmy,
it's easy and it's fun.
You know, sometimes I do it
for hours.
Folding and hanging, and you
know I even made up a song?
It's called
"Folding and Hanging."
I could teach it to you!
( operatic voice ):
Folding and hanging ♪
I'm folding ♪
Uh, Carl
Carl, Carl
isn't the Wonderful World
of Llamas show
going to be on
pretty soon?
Oh, yeah, thanks
for reminding me.
I better go home.
Tonight's episode
is "Bahama Llama."
Wouldn't want to miss that.
Hey, does time fly
when you're folding
and hanging or what? Bye, Jim.
Bye, Carl.
Folding and hanging! ♪
Jimmo, hey, Jim-Jam
I was just in the neighborhood
and wanted to have a little
chit-chat with you about this
pants business.
You know, son,
believe it or not
there was a time
when I, myself
used to leave my pants
on the floor.
And then one day, I
I picked them up, and well,
the rest is history, son!
Speaking of history
just think
if our founding fathers
had left their pants
on the floor, huh?
What if Attila the Hun
hadn't picked up his pants?
What about Luke Skywalker,
your her
I tell you, the Force
was with that guy's pants.
I'm glad I've cleared that up
for you, son.
Buh-bye.
Whoops-a-daisy,
barn door's open.
( zipping )
As Goddard as my witness,
I'll never pick up pants again.
Lady and gentleman, Mom and Dad.
Through the miracle
of neutron nanotechnology
I present "Smart Pants."
( chuckles ):
Very good, son.
That's wonderful.
I don't know how
you figured that
My little talk
with Jimmy paid off.
I should write a book.
I think I will,
and I'm going to call it
My Little Talk
with Jimmy Paid Off.
Now something this impressive
surely deserves the cancellation
of the cruel and unusual
punishment
of not being able
to go to the movies.
Well, your pants did get
put away. All right.
Zingo! Let's have pie.
( giggles )
( crickets chirping )
( door creaking )
( electrical buzzing )
Hey, Cindy, what's up,
girlfriend?
Hey, Libby.
"Monday, 7:59 a.m.
No sign of Neutron;
can give my report in peace."
You are one obsessed chic.
Hey guys, why is today
like no other day?
Huh, you asked,
hmm, hmm, hmm?
'Cause I brought a new
Ultra Lord action figure
errr!
You bring one of those
every day, ultra-loser.
Well, well,
Miss Maiden of Wrongness
evidently you are not aware
that this is the Ultra-Lord
action figure number three
with factory gender error.
( girl's voice ):
Should I wear this dress
to the prom?
And now, let
us welcome
geek number two, the
static cling king.
Hey guys, guess who
did his own laundry
this morning?
You?
( snaps fingers ):
Got that right, girlfriend.
Cool, Carl. I wish
I had a balloon
to stick to you.
( laughs )
( electrical zapping )
Ow. That hurt.
Hey, no cuts,
Neutron.
Care to try out my new
solar-powered jetpack back pack?
Hmm, let me think.
Um, no. I'd rather
eat a snail.
Whoa!
( thud )
Another Neutron special.
( backfiring )
( electrical buzzing )
( screams ):
Oh, my stars
and garters!
Nice to see your bright
and shiny faces
Are your reports ready?
Yes, Miss Fowl, and wait
till you hear mine.
It'll be the best.
( music playing )
Origami, the ancient art
of Japanese paper folding.
I will be making
the most difficult
of all origami sculptures--
a snow monkey
Actually, paper folding
originated in China
riding a flying dragon
in the second century AD
while drinking tea
and was brought to Japan
on a ladder
in the sixth century!
in December!
Cindy, I didn't know
you and Jimmy
were doing
this report together.
We're not.
( electrical buzzing )
( all gasping )
Yes, Jimmy?
I, um, I sense a disturbance
in my pants, ma'am.
Jimmy, if you need to go
to the bathroom
I can give you a hall pass.
Negative.
Miss Fowl, the nanochips in my
pants are making me do this.
The spicy ranch kind?
I love those.
Oh! Ah!
I'm working up here!
CARL:
Jimmy's doing origami, too.
Yeah, but much better than Cindy
with cutting-edge
special effects.
You can't even see the wires or
the blue screen; it's amazing.
Whew.
CARL:
All right, Jimmy!
Whoo-hoo!
( screams )
Neutron, you big show-off.
You had to make
everybody look at you
Mr. Big Science
Smart Guy!
No, I didn't!
I installed a nanochip
in my pants
so they'd pick
themselves up,
and then
( buzzing )
( grunts )
They seem to be
developing an advanced
brainial capacity.
( all screaming )
Neutron, you've
got five seconds
to tell me
what's going on!
It would take five hours
to accurately explain it to you,
Vortex.
Start explaining, Neutron!
You're kidding me
( screams )
Jimmy, my mom doesn't allow me
to do the twist!
Whoa, whoa!
I've got it under control.
I'll just remove
and disable the nanochip.
Then it'll stop.
Neutron, as soon as I stop
limboing, I'm kicking your butt.
Whoo! I made it.
Everything's under control.
Whoa. Strike
that last statement.
( laughter )
Oh, that's great, Jimmy.
What a guy.
I see London,
I see France!
You got really good eyesight.
( all screaming )
Um, I'm not sure,
but this is probably
the most embarrassing moment
of our short lives.
On the other hand,
you all get to see
my Ultra-Lord
underwear.
Limited edition
with Ultra-auto-fly
glow-in-the-dark
only available in Japan.
Oh, my gosh!
I, like, have a pimple!
A pimple? Where?
You're plastic.
You don't get pimples.
Neutron, prepare to face
the wrath of Vortex.
Rain check.
Carl, Shane, we must
adjourn to my lab
immediately.
And what am I supposed to do?
Uh, you could sing
the folding and hanging song.
I'm folding
on my way to ♪
How about a little kissy
for a little fishy?
( laughing )
Well, I was a fishy
but now I'm more
of a raw slice
of fish flesh.
Better hurry.
Slowly the bacteria win
and I'll be unfit to touch,
let alone kiss.
( sighs )
( laughing ):
Yeah.
Jimmy, where are your pants?
Oh, uh, pants.
Excellent question, Mom.
Um, it's a new
fashion movement--
the no-pants look.
Yeah. Everybody
at school's wearing, uh
Well, I mean,
they're not wearing
Well, what I mean is
Jimmy, it looks ridiculous.
Now, now,
sugar booger
all the kids have
their crazy fashion.
( laughing )
Well, one
of the greatest memories
of my youth was my
bell bottom muumuu.
I'm telling you
I dig the
no-pants look.
With Neutronic eye in the sky
I can locate
our runaway pants.
( whirring )
If I'm correct--
and I'm correct 89.23%
of the time--
my pants are seeking
even more pants to control.
Oh! The House of Blue Pants.
Oh, I love
that place.
It used to be
the House of
Blue Lederhosen
but, of course,
that appeals to a
very small market.
Oh.
Carl, there's
over a million
pants in there.
See, if my pants
get control
of those pants
well, we could end
up living in
London?
France?
A world ruled by pants!
Gentlemen,
it's up to us
to stop this
insanity.
Us?
Us?
Well, mostly me.
In fact, 100% me.
Phew!
All right,
that's good.
Time to save the world!
( engine sputtering )
( engine revving )
Whoa!
Go, Jimmy, Jimmy ♪
That's the voice
I hear inside ♪
Everybody, let's bounce ♪
( yelping )
It's Jimmy Neutron time. ♪
I've got to stop my pants
before they recruit more pants
and take over the world.
Gee, Jimmy, if
you just hung
up your pants
none of this would
be happening.
Carl's right.
Why are you so lazy, Jimmy?
All you had
to do was put your
I suggest we refrain
from communication
until we reach our des.
Go, Jimmy, Jimmy ♪
That's the voice
I hear inside ♪
Everybody, let's bounce ♪
Straight up
come along for the ride ♪
Go, Jimmy, Jimmy ♪
To the rescue
through the big blue sky ♪
Be back before I leave ♪
It's Jimmy Neutron time. ♪
( pants murmuring and )
( laughs )
Hey, Jimmy,
can I go play
with my pants?
No, no, Carl!
Your pants may look plw
but deep down in their pockets,
they are pure evil.
( pants laughing )
SHEEN:
Oh, no.
I left some gum
in my pants pocket.
Is-is it evil, too?
If I chew it later,
will I be evil?
If I blow a bubble,
will it be an evil bubble?!
Sheen, not to worry.
Everything will be taken care of
with a little something
I like to call
"The Pant Eliminator."
I've equipped it
with atomic-powered
pants-seeking
clothespin missiles.
These will get our pants back
will remove the nanochip
and problem solved.
Cindy's pants are going down.
( distressed muttering )
( clanging )
Sheen, your pants
are going to get pinned.
Can you do it
in slow motion?
Crud.
( clanging )
I pledge allegiance
to my pants.
Now, we have to find
your pants, Carl.
( pants humming )
( clanging )
My pants can run
but they can't hide.
( frantic high-pitched
muttering )
( grunts )
Oh, ooh.
( mumbling )
( humming )
I feel like a new man.
Oh, the freedom.
The comfort.
The gentle wafting breeze.
Howdy, neighbors.
Hey, I got two
words for you.
No pants!
( chuckles )
Yes.
It's the fabulous
fashion sensation
that's sweeping the nation
so gather 'round,
and pull 'em down.
( woman screaming )
Or you can go home and do it.
That's fine, too.
Doesn't matter.
Hey, good luck,
and welcome to the fold.
MOM:
Hugh Beaumont Neutron.
Honey, hold on.
Come in here this instant!
Just give me a
brief moment, honey.
No, honey. In now.
I've just invited people
to our pants-off later on.
Pie!
Coming.
( grunting )
Must stop pants.
( grunting )
( pants high-pitched
chattering )
( electrical zapping )
JIMMY:
My pants are infecting
the other pants.
This is definitely not good.
What can you say
at a time like this?
I'm, like, so embarrassed.
I think Ricky likes me.
( giggling )
Ultra Lord
has spoken.
Neutron, I want my pants now,
or I'm going to sue you.
I'm afraid
we've got a bigger
problem at the moment.
( electrical zapping )
( gasping )
( low mumbling )
( excited high-pitched
mumbling )
JIMMY:
Oh, no.
They're planning
a full-scale
pants invasion!
This is just like Ultra Lord
Versus Robo Fiend
Special Edition
with 17 seconds of new material!
And what a 17 seconds it was!
Listen, Neutron, I'm a girl
with looks and brains
and big plans for my future,
and they don't include
living in a world
ruled by pants.
Do something!
No time to get to the lab.
I have to make do
with the resources at hand.
( gasping )
Hugh, look!
What?
What is it?
Oh, my, it
looks like a
homage to Alfred
Hitchcock's movie
The Birds.
Do you think this could
possibly have anything to do
with Jimmy's self-folding pants?
Hey, kid, what do you think
you're doing?
Sorry, Lucky Joe,
if that is
your real name
but I've got to
take out some pants
who want to take
over the world.
Uh, what are a bunch of stupid
pants going to do, hey?
( laughing )
( loud grumbling )
( groaning )
( screaming )
No!
Uh, Jimmy!
I know you're kind of busy,
but, um
( whimpering ):
Help!
Okay, pants, let's see
how you like a little taste
of a Neutron starch bomb.
( grunting )
I could keep this up all day,
Neutron.
( grunting )
But you're welcome to detonate
any time you want to.
( grunting )
Get pressed, pants.
( high-pitched mumbling )
I've got that one,
and that one, and that one.
My cat chewed that one,
but I got it.
And all those, and that one.
And I'm missing the helmet
on that one.
My Mom has that one
on layaway.
How about a little
fabric softener, tough guys?
( grumbling )
Wow!
That stuff really works!
You know, Jimmy does some pretty
amazing things, doesn't he?
Please.
I could be
just as amazing
if my head was
the size of Texas.
My uncle's from Texas!
DAD:
So, you and your little
pantsy-wantsy friends
thought you could take over
the world, huh?
Well, you didn't know
you'd have to deal
with Hugh Neutron, did you?
So, talk.
( laughs )
You can't talk, can you?
You know why?
Because you're pants,
so zip it!
Hugh?
Huh?
Look.
What?
The Retroville Pants Invasion
continues.
Our only hope seems
to be a little boy
with an extremely large head
and an outrageously
tall hairdo.
Ooh, he looks oddly familiar.
You know, sugar booger,
they're right.
Television is pretty .
Come on, Hugh.
We're going downtown.
We're getting pie?!
To get our son!
And put on
your pants.
Can do.
JIMMY:
My pants are getting more
powerful by the second.
And I'm out of weapons.
Think, think, think!
( electrical zapping )
Brain blast!
If I can create a colossal
amount of static cling
I can capture my pants,
destroy the nanochip
and still have time
to get to the movies.
But where can I get
that much static?
Cheese World.
Rug World.
Mime World.
Rug World!
That's it!
Roll out the red carpet.
( electrical zapping )
( pants grumbling )
( Old West showdown theme
playing )
( grumbling )
( humming )
( grumbling )
( roaring and
electrical zapping )
( groaning )
( groaning )
( low growling )
( sizzling and zapping )
( frantic mumbling )
( applause and cheering )
BOTH:
Yeah! Yeah!
Stop it!
So
Neutron, I bet
you think you're
a great big hero.
Well, Cindy, you know,
it's just all
It was your stupid fault
all this happened.
I'm watching you, Big Brain.
Well, I'm left speechless.
Ultra Lord,
would you care to retort.
My new pants are, like, so cool!
I could just about die.
That's just
what I was thinking.
I missed you,
pants.
It's so good to
be back inside.
Can we go to the movies
now, Jimmy?
Okay. Last one
there buys the candy.
MOM:
James Isaac
Neutron
you made this mess
and you are not going anywhere
until you pick up these pants.
Mom!
U.S. DEPARTMENT OF EDUCATION
and MTV TELEVISION NETWORKS
Captioned by
access.wgbh.org
( barking )
Oh.
Hi! I'm Paul.
JIMMY:
Got to blast.