The Alfred Hitchcock Hour (1962) s01e01 Episode Script

1
Good evening. I am organizing a key club.
It seems to be the thing to do.
For the uninitiated, a
key club is one which
members can enter
only if they possess a key.
These clubs are terribly exclusive
since membership is limited to men.
My club is completely different.
It is for women.
Inside the club is everything a
woman could want, including me.
You see, I am the club's only bunny.
But enough of my troubles.
This evening's story has
little to do with keys or clubs.
It is about gambling and is
called a piece of the action.
However, before we
proceed with that part of
our show, we bring you
this paid announcement.
What's the matter, Ed?
What's the money? Four.
Eight opens for two. Bump it two.
Ed?
Are you in, Ed?
You know, you're the kind of guy I love.
A dealer sits cozy for two
raises and then sandbags.
Call Nate? Thanks.
COD?
Yep.
One.
One.
Give me three.
Taylor takes two.
Nice trick.
You should have practiced more.
I was wondering why he won
the last four hands he dealt.
Cash me in.
You okayed this, Chisler?
Sure, the same way I
okayed you on the credit rating.
That was stupid of you, Ali, and clumsy.
Now, you're gonna deal
from the bottom of the deck.
Do it like this.
18,000.
I'll go with it, Duke.
You'll go with all of it.
What are you gonna do?
Duke, it's the first time, I swear.
I'll pay off.
Duke, tell them. You know me.
I do now.
Where do you think
you're going? To the office.
Duke, talk to them!
Why don't you let them go, Ed?
Yeah, I heard that before.
Let them go, Ed. I'm not that charitable.
I lost all the other times.
Yeah, but this time you try to win.
The hard way.
Please, Duke, please.
I'm sorry, Ali, there's
nothing I can do about it.
You dealt the hand.
Play it.
Good morning, daddy.
I've been waiting two days
to hear you say that, boss.
What day is it? Monday.
Sixty hours, never left the hotel room.
How's the track? Clear and fast.
Keep away from the rail.
Nah, you tell me.
To call the house? Yeah.
What did my wife say? That's it.
She didn't say nothing, just hung up.
Maybe you ought to stop off someplace and
buy a little something, eh, Duke? Later.
The office first.
Good morning, Miss Kelly.
Do you want coffee, a pill, or the mail?
Any important?
A letter from your
brother Chuck and wires
from two businessmen
asking for consultations.
You know what I mean.
Did you check their credit rating?
They're both A1.
Why don't those guys go to Vegas and
lose their money like the common people?
Some businessmen can't afford public vices.
It makes their stockholders nervous.
I got something here that's
going to make you nervous.
Looks like John B.
Marsden, the investment
counselor, may be needing
a marriage counselor.
Rumor has it that
Mrs. Marsden, formerly
socialite Alice Stoneham,
is packing for Reno.
When were you home last? Friday.
It is now Monday morning.
I'm surprised all she wanted
to do was see a lawyer.
I'd have been at the
missing persons bureau.
You don't quit on a winning streak.
You're always on a winning streak.
She's waited a long time, Duke.
What is it, four years?
Friday will be our fifth anniversary.
Don't worry, I'll square it.
With what? A full-length mink?
She's had full-length mink
ever since she was born.
And what do I do if some reporter
calls about that item? Deny it.
I want to make a phone
call, then bring your book in.
Kimo, this is Mr. Marsden.
Is Mrs. Marsden home?
Oh, yes, sir, Mr. Marsden.
Tell her I'd like to speak to her.
Mrs.
Marsden say not to speak to anybody today.
Well, where is she?
She's taking samba down by a pool.
Oh, Kimo, if she should ask.
Tell her I'm stopping off at the
club for a shave and a steam,
then I'm coming home. Thank you.
This is Household.
Oh.
Is she still there?
Did she go to Anchorage, Alaska?
No, she's sunbathing.
I want to send a wire of congratulations
to Chuck on his prospects.
No money order?
No.
I sent one last month when he graduated.
How much? It ought to go in the books.
Ten thousand.
Well, he's just out of law school.
If he's going to practice law, I want
him to look like a successful lawyer.
He'll need a little money.
You've been saying that
ever since I can remember.
Chuck needs a little money.
Who should I give it
to if not my kid brother?
Don't look now, but
that kid is 24 years old.
What do you want him to do? Get a
pick and shovel job? It's been done.
He graduated with honors.
He's going to be a crackerjack lawyer.
He swore he'd work harder than he did.
Now, what do you want from him, blood?
You're worried, aren't you, Duke?
About what?
Well, someday he could find out
that you're a professional gambler.
He's never heard of Duke
Marsden, and he never will.
Just send the wire.
Well, you're the boss,
but if I had a brother
Be glad you had a father.
Hiya, Dutchess.
I've asked you not to call me that.
Every Duke needs one.
I hadn't noticed lately.
Don't.
The Marsden charm doesn't work anymore.
Ah, you've been reading those
ridiculous newspaper rumors.
About our getting a divorce.
I'm perfectly serious, Duke.
Perfect, yes.
Serious? No.
Hey, will you get out of
the fish bowl and talk to me?
All right, baby, I know
you're a poker widow.
I haven't been home in three days,
but what's the hurry with the lawyer bit?
What are you, a seal?
Glad to jump in this bathtub
to make you listen? Okay.
Duke! You clown.
I know you can't swim.
I know, but you wouldn't listen.
I had a gamble that you
wouldn't let me drown.
Because that's what I would do without you.
Oh, Duke.
How long?
How long what?
Do I have to wait for you to
keep your promise and quit?
You knew what I was when you married me.
Sure.
I was still a starry-eyed debutant.
You were exciting.
But I can't live alone, Duke.
I'm afraid.
Afraid of what?
How easy it gets to mix too many
martinis when you don't come home.
I bother lonely women who know a place,
a quiet, out-of-the-way bar where
a lot of nice men stop for a drink.
Oh, Duke, don't make me
jump into a pool I can't swim in.
Just broke the bank at Monte Carlo, baby.
You mean that?
You'll quit? I just did.
Then take me away someplace.
Name it.
Hawaii.
Hawaii?
When?
How about Friday?
That's our anniversary.
Wait until Friday's the 13th.
It'll be the luckiest day of our lives.
But be here, Duke.
I'll be here.
I'll be here this time.
I'll be here, baby.
You ought to try eating a salad sometime.
Where am I, a rabbit?
What did you do with Ali's sack?
Never heard of him.
What'd you pay for the suit?
This? A couple hundred?
Why?
I paid 300 for this sack.
How come it don't like a hundred
bucks better on me than it does on you?
Well, maybe we have different tailors.
Say what you mean. It ain't a tailor.
I get the best. Shark skin, Italian silk.
It don't matter.
I still look like I come from the dock.
You know something, Marsden?
I come from the dock.
You don't like me, do you Ed?
How come I never get lucky like you, Duke?
You know something, Crutcher,
you take losing too personally.
It eats you like an ulcer.
That's not good for a gambler.
Well, what time are we
playing tomorrow? We're not.
That's what I came to talk to you about.
I'm quitting.
You just took me for 30 Gs.
Well, that's poker, Ed.
You pay to learn.
Friday's my anniversary.
My wife and I are going to Hawaii.
On my dough.
At the moment, it's mine.
Ready for dessert, Mr.
Crutcher? Yeah.
I want a chance to get even, Duke.
You'll never get even, Ed.
You're a pigeon.
Do you know how much
a plaster cast can itch?
Especially in warm climate like Hawaii.
I haven't been scared since I was in
the haunted house at Coney Island, Ed.
I was five years old at the time.
Name your game.
Any time, any place tomorrow.
In the afternoon, I'll take
every nickel you bring with you.
Remember, I'm quitting.
This is your last chance at me.
You'll shoot craps.
The bell you drew, my house, one o'clock.
I'll see you then, pigeon.
Here we are.
Eight, looking for a ten.
See who that is, Monty.
Maybe it's your old lady.
She's at the beauty parlor.
How long can that take?
Ever see my wife?
She'd be there at midnight.
Nah, it's nader Frankie Portugal.
Hi, Frankie.
Hi.
You guys seen this?
They found Ali Saxon.
Shot.
Sell Frankie some chips, Monty.
Where'd they find him?
In front of the rescue mission.
And what was Ali doing in
front of the rescue mission?
Maybe he was waiting to be saved.
Shoot, your point's ten.
Scotch, water?
Just got in from the east.
Lot of rain back there.
No, no, not in Florida.
I was on sort of a vacation.
Must have been nice.
I got lucky.
Dames, huh? No, cards.
Well, that's life.
I never even learned to play checkers.
A fellow in Florida told me that if I
wanted to get in on some west coast action,
this was the place to look for it.
Look, Mac, all I know about
Florida is they ship grapefruits.
You're careful,
aren't you? I like that.
Oh, I do, really.
What are the chances am I
getting in on a game? Slim and none.
I've got a bundle that says
that I can beat anybody in town.
Uh-uh.
You might lose.
It'd be my hard luck.
No, it'd be mine.
Then you wouldn't like me anymore.
Hardly anybody does.
So let's quit while
we still like each other.
Okay, friend.
It's your deal.
But I'm staying at the Hotel Windsor.
Room 312.
Mrs. Meyers.
Hello, Mr. Meyers.
Come with me.
Well, then, can I have a drink first?
No, not by surprise.
Huh?
Hello, big brother.
Jack! Fat brother.
Why didn't you tell us?
Oh, I just thought I'd slip in
quietly and try to steal your wife.
Oh, fat chance, fat chance.
Let's see what they turned
out at your law school.
All right?
Yeah, that's good enough
for the Supreme Court.
Well, I'll let you and
the Chief Justice get
reacquainted while I
brief Kimo on dinner.
Oh, ask Danny to bring out a
couple of drinks, will you, please?
What would you like?
Whiskey sour, fine.
Did you, uh, fly out or
? Let's talk about
the law business.
What about that firm in Boston
you wrote about? Oh, yeah.
Leland, Ward & Merrick.
Yeah, that's the one.
Yep.
I contacted them after graduation.
They offered me a job.
That's what I was hoping for.
Listen, Jack, I'm
I'm really grateful about
the 10,000 you sent me.
Ah, forget it.
When did you start?
Uh, I haven't made up my mind yet.
Why not?
Well, see, I met Leland
through his daughter.
Jack, she's a fabulous girl.
Fabulous?
She's like Alice, you know what I mean?
Yeah, I'm trying.
Well, she's used to things like this.
Jack, a law clerk job sounds like
the beginning of a long, long road.
Yeah.
What are you trying to tell me?
That she's interested in
you only if you've got money?
I didn't say that.
It sounds like it.
Look, Chuck, you've got an
education that's worth more than money.
I thought you had to
find out exactly what this
girl was thinking before I
made any definite plans.
Look, Jack, I owe you a lot,
but I can make my own decisions.
You can what? I said I can.
..
Wait here.
What is it, Denny?
Could you come inside for a second?
How can I wait?
Something important come up. Let's go.
I'll be right out.
What is it, Denny?
You're interrupting a family reunion.
That guy you're talking
to, coming to Pete's.
Couldn't have. He's my brother.
Yeah? He said he was from
Florida looking for a game.
He's got a bundle.
You're sure? I'm sure.
Your local stations have been
clamoring for a piece of the action,
so we are rewarding them with the
following segment to identify themselves.
This should be enough
time unless some of
them have extraordinarily
long call letters.
Jack, I'm sorry I snapped at you like that.
So am I.
But I'm not a kid anymore.
I've got to live my own life.
You put it right on the line, don't you?
Yes.
Just like you did with
the money I sent you.
It's a nice tan you've got.
Did you get it in Boston or Florida?
You've been having me followed?
No.
You sent me $10,000, Jack. I didn't
know there were any strings attached.
Keep your voice down.
All right, all right.
I took the money and I went to Florida.
And I sat in on a game, a big game.
They're all big games
right from the first little one.
And I made a big score, Jack. 50 grand.
And they're all big scores
right from the first easy buck.
Don't lecture me.
I'm not lecturing.
Everybody gambles, Jack.
Your business, investments.
It's legal, it's slow, respectable,
but it's gambling and you know it.
Who's talking about my business?
Jack, Jack, I'm sorry.
I'm sorry, but we're just different,
that's all. We always were.
You're like Mom, a worrier.
I'm more like the old man.
What do you know about the old man?
You were seven years old when he died.
I know he knew how to live.
And he killed everything around him, including
Mom. She's the one who kept us alive.
I should have known
better than to come here.
Will you listen to me, punk?
Maybe you were too
young to know or too dumb.
The way we used to get thrown out
of one cheap dump after the other.
You sang that to me in high school.
I never went to high school.
I had a shoe shine box when I was ten.
Because the old man threw
all of his dough away gambling.
But you don't remember that.
You only remember the
few times he won the trips to
Coney Island, the cotton
candy, the Ferris wheel.
I like Coney Island, Jack. Sue me.
You've got to get out of here before I
do something we'll both be sorry for.
You know, you're just
forgetting one little thing.
The old man was a born loser, but I'm not.
Then quit while you're ahead.
All gamblers die broke.
My apologies to Alice for the dinner.
Can a lady get a drink here unescorted?
A lady can get anything she
wants here if she's unescorted.
I'm afraid.
Where's Chuck? Changing for dinner?
He had to leave.
What happened, John?
We had a little rowl, that's all.
About what? Did he find out about you?
No, he didn't find out about me.
It's an old family thing.
I'm family. Name's Marsden.
I like it that way.
What was it, darling?
About his plans, that's all. Do you
mind if we don't talk about it? All right.
Hiya, duchess.
Mr. Friday.
To Hawaii.
Am I gonna keep you busy tomorrow, mister?
You're gonna make like a husband.
Tomorrow?
We've got shopping. Last minute things.
I have to go to town for a while.
Not the office.
I have to close that, too, don't I?
Get the plane tickets,
square things with Chuck.
Oh.
What's our flight time,
Friday? One o'clock.
Then we'll have to leave
for the airport by noon.
I can hardly wait.
There you are.
Until noon Friday? I'll be here.
Oh, well.
Your secretary said 10 minutes.
It's been 20.
Yeah.
Game still on for tonight? Yeah.
Ed, I know it's July, but I'm gonna
give you a Christmas present.
Like what?
Well, there's a young kid in
from Florida looking for a game.
I want him cleaned.
What's in it? About 50,000.
How come you're so good to me, Duke?
Well, you're the heavy loser.
I thought I'd throw it your way.
Why don't you give him the bath yourself?
I'll be busy packing.
What's your piece of
the accent? Nothing.
I'll probably be gone
before the game's over.
Yeah.
Gone.
You know, well, this fish is
beginning to have a little odor, Duke.
This fish is so fresh, it's pathetic.
How do I get in touch with this guy?
Windsor Hotel, room 312,
but Pete'll steer you to him.
We're set up at the
Colonial Arms, 10 o'clock.
Keep the change out. It's on me, Ed.
Are you catching a train, darling?
Hmm?
The what?
Keep looking at it.
Oh, man's loose.
What time is it? Almost 10.
Should we have our coffee inside?
No.
Or out here at the
bottom of the pool? Fine.
Oh, honey.
I might as well be in China.
Sorry, baby.
I'm back now.
I'll get the coffee.
No, don't go.
This is a new and funny feeling.
What?
Asking me to stay.
This is the hour you were
always anxious to leave me.
Nobody's ever gonna leave anybody again.
Everybody stays just like this.
Where they belong.
Straight to the king.
That does it.
Who is it? Florida.
Come on in, kid.
My name's Ed.
Okay, here.
Grab it. That's the hot seat.
It will be.
What are they playing this year in Florida?
This isn't Florida.
We play dealer's choice.
For money, 20,000 per spy.
Whites, 100. Reds, 5.
And blues, 1,000.
Hello? Hello, Duke.
Ed Kretcher.
Wait a minute.
I told you not to call my home.
Especially not in the middle of the night.
Well, it's the middle
of the night here, too.
And you better get over here
in a hurry, and I'm not kidding.
I told you I'm quitting.
I don't care about you.
It's that fish you sent us, Dukie boy.
It's beginning to stink.
He's taken us 60 grand in four hours.
You don't know how to pluck a
chicken when it's handed to you.
No, but I know how to stuff one.
And your Christmas present may
just end up at the rescue mission.
Danny, get the car out and
meet me by the side of the house.
Right away.
Right away.
Look, I thought I came here to play cards.
Play solitaire.
I might try quitting.
That I wouldn't try.
Well, then what are we waiting for?
Let's play cards.
We're waiting for fresh blood.
Who?
The guy who steered you here.
Duke.
I told you, I don't know
anybody named Duke.
He's the one who phoned me.
Little boy Blue, he don't know anything.
I knew a girl like that once.
Innocent.
Diamonds up to here.
Fifteen minutes, pretty quick.
Head down.
Chuck.
Well, what is this?
Big brother watching over me?
I thought you didn't know him.
Like he said, I'm his brother.
Well, you forgot to mention that.
Duke.
Duke?
You?
You heard the man.
A fish from Florida, he says.
Is that what you told him? Duke.
Are you being funny?
No, I'm just waiting for the lecture.
Give me a sec.
There's no lecture on the evils of
gambling, big brother? No lecture.
Just a lesson.
My big square successful brother.
Well, you're a bigger phony
than the old man ever was.
You gonna talk or play?
With you, I wouldn't miss it.
I smell a frame.
If this was a frame, I wouldn't be here.
This is between him and me.
Yeah, on our money.
I'll get it back for you.
Couldn't take it away from me with a gun.
Huh? I could.
You playing or not?
You gonna trust him?
I trust everybody. Especially brothers.
Ed.
Play or get out.
Well, I'll be watching you.
All you'll see is what you pay to see.
When you call.
Auntie.
Jacks are better.
Investment.
You are my investment.
You're high.
Check to the possible flush.
Five.
Five.
And? Five again.
Three shy.
Cash.
I haven't got any more on me.
Well, I owe you ten grand.
Remember?
You better save those.
Don't seem to need them anymore.
Do.
Call.
Ace wire.
Hold it.
How do you know he ain't got the flush?
Because he didn't raise.
We'll see.
Don't ever do that again, Ed.
I just wanted to make sure you
weren't folding the flush to him.
Nobody sees my cards
unless they pay for them.
No wonder you're giving lessons tonight.
How would you like a rap in the mouth?
Oh, Big Brother wouldn't let you do that.
Come on, knock it off.
We need some food
and a couple of fresh decks of cards.
He's getting soggy from handling.
No room service between midnight and seven.
Danny's waiting in my car at the
desk and send someone out to tell him.
Get the cards at the all-night
drugstore and the food at Tiny's.
I'm gonna take a shower.
Why shower? You're still taking a bath.
Now, desk,
there's a chauffeur
waiting outside in the car.
Would you ask him to
come into the phone, please?
Mr. Marston's office.
Oh, no, Mrs. Marston.
No, I just got in myself.
It's just nine o'clock.
Will you have him call me if he does?
Or Danny, if you hear from him.
Two.
and three more.
You're slowing down.
Four.
Last card.
Bet the Kings.
I check.
Check.
Five grand.
Five again.
Four.
Let's try that again.
You're five and up you.
Ten.
Why'd I call you? Three nines.
I knew you improved.
And I knew you knew.
But you just didn't know how much.
That hurt, didn't it?
Just shut up and deal.
Oh, getting emotional.
That means scared.
Do you mind if the rest
of us play? Low ball.
You know I hate.
the game.
Ed, you're not dealing.
Smiley.
I'm Pat.
You do too.
That's right.
I come out betting.
Five thousand.
Ready to that Pat hand?
I have to get rid of the amateurs.
I call.
Five.
And raise five.
Call.
You're five.
Ten better.
Good idea.
It's a ten.
I'll raise it.
Twenty.
Twenty thousand dollars to call.
Call.
I've only got eighteen.
Save it.
I'll take it from your next hand.
You're bluffing. I can raid you.
I call eighteen.
Too shy.
Ed.
I'll make you a side bet.
Just in case his
dumb luck comes back.
Okay.
I'm in.
King's fourth.
Well, let me see here.
Four little deuces.
Looks like you came
in third little brother.
Do you want another stack?
I've got plenty.
I'm broken. You know it.
You wouldn't listen.
You thought I was all
cotton candy in Coney Island.
Open the door Smiley.
Now get out.
We've got to go.
You can keep the money.
Split it any way you like.
You're a big man Duke.
Why? It was a great act.
I've been waiting a
long time for the finish.
I'm glad you enjoyed it.
I didn't. I just said it was great.
Eight of diamonds.
Jack of spades.
A marked debt.
I sent you a pigeon you couldn't take him.
I had to cure him in a hurry.
It didn't cost you anything.
Not this time.
There were a couple of other pigeons
that didn't pay off for us like this one.
Yeah.
I'm thinking about that.
Maybe it's because of your brother
you're making this generous gesture.
You sent your driver for the cards
the night we played at the Grosvenor.
Yeah.
And you win big that night Duke.
And those other nights.
All those other nights.
All those games were on the level.
Were they?
Look Ed I don't care what you think.
And I'm not Ali Saxon.
You're not leading me
out of here like a lamb.
So get out of my way.
I got a plane to catch.
Go ahead.
See what you catch.
You're in for me? Oh yes chemo.
Bring my car around to the front
and put my luggage in the trunk.
Just mine.
Mr. Marsden car. Just come up and drive.
Do as I say please.
Hello Mrs. Marsden.
Goodbye.
You said noon it's just noon.
Whatever the time is it's too late.
I'm sorry baby I couldn't help it.
We're always sorry.
You know I think that's
what I'm the most tired of.
A world full of sorry people.
I'm leaving without you Duke.
Duke.
What is it darling?
What happened? They must have.
Shut up Danny.
I had a little accident.
With a gun.
Call a doctor quickly Danny.
Get help.
It'll be alright darling.
I know you will.
I'll lead Tim to one.
Oh Duke.
I'll be a champ.
Those are good odds.
Bet.
I figured.
just making the old folks home.
was enough of a gamble.
Duke.
Oh Lord.
Never said a word.
Just get him home by noon.
In tonight's play
everyone learned a lesson.
Ed and the boys learned that one
shouldn't go about shooting people.
The police took a hand
in teaching them that.
Chuck learned that you shouldn't gamble.
Duke learned you
shouldn't cheat at cards.
And Alice learned that you shouldn't
marry an investment counselor.
There is also sad news
about my new key club.
It has become even more
exclusive than we planned.
The sheriff is now
our only member.
We've been padlocked.
I shall be back next
week with another drama.
Scenes of which will
appear in just a moment.