The Borgias s01e01 Episode Script

- qui te custodiat ab hoste maligno, et perducat in vitam aeternam.
Amen.
Asperges me, Domine, hyssopo, et mundabor: lavabis me, et super nivem dealbabor.
- [Pope.]
: You are afraid to enter, but you must.
- secundum multitudinem - [Pope.]
: I am about to meet my maker.
I have confessed.
And I confess I am very afraid.
Colonna.
Sforza.
Orsini.
Borgia.
- Your Holiness.
- Della Rovere.
-Gloria Patri - You will fight like dogs over this corpse I leave for this throne of St.
Peter's.
But it was pure once.
We have all sullied it with our greed and lechery.
Which of you will wash it clean? - It shall be cleansed, Your Holiness, with the tears we shed for you.
I swear before the Living God.
- You swear thus? A Spanish murrano? A white moor? - As Vice-Chancellor, I swear before the Living God.
- And so do I, Your Holiness.
- And I, Your Holiness.
- And I.
- Rest assured, Your Holiness.
The glory of our Holy Mother Church will be restored in my lifetime.
- [Pope.]
: Please God.
[Man and woman panting and gasping.]
- There's a door behind-- leads to the street.
- The back passage? You're a cleric? - Didn't you notice? - There was nothing ecclesiastical about you last night.
- By night By night I am who I want to be.
By day, I am thus.
[Knocking.]
Lucrezia! Sister! - I spied a lady--another one! - There's a punishment for spying.
- What's that? - Oh, I think you know! - No! [Squealing and laughing.]
[Laughing.]
Can I come to your wedding? - I'll never have a wedding, you know that.
- No.
You are betrothed to God.
Don't you love God, Cesare? - More than I love you? - Don't be sad, brother.
Maybe Papa will become pope, and you can be who you want to be.
- If he does become pope, I'll be what he wants me to be.
- Can a pope have children, Cesare? - I've heard it rumoured that Pope Innocent has 12.
- But I have also heard it rumoured that he is dying.
- No news in that.
He's been dying for weeks now.
- If he does die, will our father wear his crown? - The new pope will be elected by the College of Cardinals, my love.
And only God can predict the outcome.
- Well, since you will have no wedding, I will pray for God to choose Papa.
I want to wear a beautiful white veil crowned with pearls for his coronation.
- God may need some help, then.
[Bell tolling.]
[Crowd speaking animatedly.]
- What have they heard? - The pope breathes his last.
- God rest his soul [Bell tolling quietly.]
[Muted speaking.]
- We must get you out of here before they lock the doors.
- And so it begins.
- You know what to do? - Yes, Father.
- Keep our family safe.
Until the new pope is elected, it will be anarchy in Rome-- every faction fighting for its own candidate.
And if--after the first vote-- if the smoke is black-- - As you said, Father, I know what to do.
- [Whispering.]
: I have waited a lifetime for this moment.
We will go over it again.
If we fail at the first vote, I will send word - On the wings of a dove-- - names of those cardinals who need persuading.
- With properties, benefices, and, if need be, gold.
They call it simony, Father.
- God will forgive us, my son.
But I will not forgive failure from you or your brother.
Am I understood? - We will not fail you, Father.
- Mm.
Go now.
- Back to Spain, Borgia! You've had your day in Rome.
You can't wring any more favours from a dead pope.
- I was born here, as far as I'm aware.
- If a pig is born in a stable, does that make him a horse? [Crowd laughing appreciatively.]
[Man chuckling.]
Tsk, tsk, tsk! Rome is for Romans now.
The new pope will see to that.
- And if the new pope is Spanish? - And if my mother's the Virgin Mary? - Was the Virgin a Roman whore? That's news to me.
[Man grunting angrily.]
[Grunting with effort.]
[Crowd jeering.]
[Grunting.]
- Excuse me.
- Ah! - Ah - My brother speaks before he thinks.
[Man panting.]
He begs your pardon.
I should have let them do it.
- Kill me? Your younger brother? Our father would never have forgiven you.
- Have you heard? - [Woman.]
: Even Gioffre has heard.
Have you not? - [Boy.]
: The pope has died.
- You know what that means? - I know there will be an election.
- And the city will be bedlam until it's over.
- [Lucrezia.]
: Do you think our father can win, Juan? - [Juan.]
: Are we allowed to dream, Mother? - Your father found ways to love and care for us in this house, but I'm not sure as pope he can do the same.
- As pope, he can do what he wants.
- Are you sure? Kings and popes and emperors belong to their peoples, not to their families.
- So, we allow the election to run its course, and he won't be pope.
- What other course is there? It's in the hands of God.
- It's in the hands of the College of Cardinals, Mother.
It's not quite the same thing.
This one.
- Cardinal Borgia.
- My Lord Cardinal.
- Whoever wins this contest-- - Election.
- If you were a different man I might vote for you.
You've performed your duties as Vice-Chancellor admirably.
The Church has need of your organizational genius.
- But - She has other needs as well.
- And they would be? - Honesty.
Probity.
Goodness.
- You find me lacking in those qualities? - Yes.
And so I shall fight you.
To the end, and beyond that, if need be, with any means at my disposal.
- I do tend to win whatever battles I fight.
But what talk we of fighting? It is all in God's hands.
Good night, My Lord.
- To Cardinal Rodrigo Borgia, four votes.
[Cardinals murmuring.]
To Cardinal Ascanio Sforza, six votes.
[Cardinals murmuring.]
To Cardinal Guilliano Della Rovere, seven votes.
[Cardinals murmuring.]
To Cardinal Orsino Orsini, six votes.
None has the require majority [Crowd murmuring.]
- Dominus Deum - After the death of Pope Sixtus, they holed us up here for a month - Appalling.
- The company was tolerable, but as for the food I had to lead the revolt-- insist our dishes could be brought in from outside.
- How wise.
- And now there's crystal in my soup.
- Please, have mine, Your Grace.
- Oh.
- Don't drink this.
It's vinegar; I've tasted it.
[Wine spilt onto the ground.]
[Whispering.]
: From my vineyards in Valencia.
- How can I thank you? - Hmm I wonder Mmm! - est a me The rules are clear.
No outside contact is permitted under any circumstance.
- But you must know that Cardinal Versucci's digestion is very delicate.
- Which is why he has rabbit baked in milk.
- Ah.
Good.
And Cardinal Piccolomini - Uh Suckling pig with Rosemary.
- Indeed.
The well-being of the curia is of the greatest importance.
As Vice-Chancellor, their health is my concern.
Mens sana in corpore sano.
- I think St.
Augustine might disagree with you.
He extolled the virtues of fasting.
- St.
Augustine never had to vote in conclave.
My dear sons, the Cardinals Versucci, Piccolomini, and Sanso, grant some titles and benefices from the Borgia abbeys, monasteries, and bishoprics.
- [Cesare's voice.]
: Versucci, Piccolomini, and Sanso, grant some titles and benefices from the Borgia abbeys, monasteries, and bishoprics.
- Julius Versucci - All rights to the Abbey of St.
Catherine of Siena.
Cardinal Allesandro Piccolomini.
- Suckling pig for the cardinal, roasted.
- Roasted and stuffed.
- Cardinal Julius Versucci.
- Uh, rabbit.
Rabbit baked in milk.
- Tasty.
- Cardinal Giuliano Della Rovere has garnered ten votes.
[Cardinals murmuring.]
Cardinal Ascanio Sforza, five.
Cardinal Rodrigo Borgia has garnered eight votes.
But none has the required majority.
[Cardinals murmuring.]
[Doves cooing.]
- [Borgia.]
: My dear son, we are in sight of our goal, but now you must redouble our efforts.
Send your brother round the Borgia churches to empty them of gold, ornament, and precious stone.
- I have emptied the churches of the Romagna.
I have stripped altars bare.
They were rotten with gold ornament.
- Yes, you are a true reformer, brother.
- These cardinals know no vows of poverty.
- [Lucrezia.]
: Why the dove, Cesare? - It has a dual purpose, my love.
Like many things in life, it serves as both a symbol and a messenger.
- A symbol of what? - Of the uncorrupted soul.
- And a messenger of what? - Of corruption.
- You mean to say it bears news of how many votes we must buy in the Papal election.
- You are criminally well informed, sis.
But I trust your soul is still of the purest white.
- How many votes must we buy him, Cesare? - You know too much already, don't you? - You're wrong.
I know too little - [Cesare's voice.]
: Dear Father, nine mules laden down with gold and treasure are being distributed to the palaces of the following cardinals: - Cardinal Guiliano Della Rovere has garnered Cardinal Ascana Sforza has garnered four Cardinal Rodrigo Borgia has garnered ten votes.
None has the required majority.
- Of course, Cardinal Sforza, the entire conclave knows that I cannot be both Vice-Chancellor and pope of Rome.
- Than you can no longer be a Vice-Chancellor.
- You mean I may yet be pope of Rome? - If you can find a suitable Vice-Chancellor.
- And how would you describe the qualities necessary for a suitable Vice-Chancellor, Cardinal Sforza? - Discretion.
- Mm-hmm.
- Loyalty.
And a certain kind of wisdom.
- Can you be more specific? - I would say the one who would be suitable as Vice-Chancellor would be wise to support the Vice-Chancellor who would be pope.
- Hmm.
And I would say we have an understanding.
- Cardinal Guiliano Della Rovere has garnered seven votes.
Cardinal Alberto Colonna, two.
Cardinal Rodrigo Borgia fourteen.
[Excited murmuring.]
Cardinal Borgia has the required majority.
- Correction: Cardinal Borgia has bought the required majority.
- What is your implication? - His implication is that the throne of St.
Peter's is for sale.
- And has been bought by a Spaniard up to his elbows in simony.
- I see.
You would prefer it had been bought by an Italian? - By someone remotely worthy of the papacy at least-- - Then my first act as pope will be to institute an enquiry into the elective process.
My second, of course will be to appoint a Vice-Chancellor-- the greatest office, with the greatest income, in my gift.
Now, there are two obvious choices: Cardinals Della Rovere and Orsini.
But the pope could not possibly appoint one who questioned his right to be pope.
- That was not my intention.
[Chuckling.]
- Nor was it mine.
- I see.
And the Spanish race is closest to your bosom.
Can we proceed, then? - To conclude: Cardinal Borgia has the required majority An examination, testes et pendentes, is required.
- And Cardinal Borgia is happy to comply.
- Can there be any doubt that the good cardinal is male? - Not if we count his children.
- Let him without children cast the first stone.
- I have heard rumours of a rhinoceros horn.
- Ooh, that small? - Boasting again? [General chuckling.]
[Borgia clears his throat.]
- Oh, go on.
The suspense is killing them.
- Habet duos testiculos et bene pendentes.
[Applause.]
- So, he's got two testicles, well hung.
- Deo gracias.
[Crowd murmuring.]
[Bells ringing.]
[Applause and cheering.]
[Bells ringing.]
[Cheering continues.]
- Habemus papam! [Cheering.]
- [Borgia.]
: Pater, et Filius, et Spiritus Sanctus.
Amen.
- tu es et dominus eternum [Pleasurable moaning.]
et Spiritus Sancti.
[Laughing.]
Amen.
- Oh! - Your sins are all forgiven, sisters.
[Laughing.]
- By the pope's bastard? - Son! His favourite son! [Gasping.]
- [Cesare.]
: I ask to confess to you, Holy Father, because I have sinned.
- How have you sinned, my son? - I have corrupted my soul.
I have pledged estates, castles, benefices to your brother cardinals.
I have transferred the documents in the innards of roasted beasts and fowls.
All to secure your election as pope.
- And God will repay us tenfold.
- But you must set my soul at ease, Father.
Can a family such as ours survive such a prize? We are Spaniards.
They hate us.
The enemies we have at present will be multiplied tenfold.
- God will protect his Vicar on Earth, Cesare, and those dearest to him.
- And will you inform God as to His duties in this regard? - Why this blasphemous tone, my son? - Because I swear, if God does not protect us, I shall.
- You are a bishop, Cesare.
You have no need of such temporal thoughts.
- You placed this collar round my neck, Father.
You made God my calling.
But the sins I've committed for you must convince you, surely, that the Church is not my calling.
I beg you now to release me of my vows.
Let me live as a layman.
As a soldier.
I can then protect our family from the storm that surely must engulf it.
- You are my eldest son, Cesare.
You were always destined to be a prince of the Church.
- I would be a prince of state, Father, and I think you know that.
- The papal army is small, Cesare.
The battles I will fight will be within these sacred walls.
This is where I will need your help.
Juan can bear arms for the Borgia family, and lead whatever army the pope has, and I will not have my authority questioned further on this.
Ego te absolvo ab omnibus censuris, et peccatis, in nomine Patris, et Filii, et Spiritus Sancti.
Amen.
[Swords clashing.]
[Grunting with effort.]
- You think it fits me, brother? - You have broad shoulders.
- As have you.
Though it lacks an insignia.
I thought a cape to cover the breastplate, with the Borgia Bull in bright yellow.
- I favour black, myself.
- Black for the cleric, but for the soldier, a prancing bull in yellow.
Or red, perhaps? Black.
It suits you.
[Giggling.]
- Welcome, Papa.
- Oh, I've missed you.
- [Woman.]
: So, you have won.
- Yes, I've won.
- You've won what you always wanted.
My congratulations.
- And I have lost.
- But what have you lost, my love? - You.
- You'll never lose me.
[Bell tolling.]
- In spirit, maybe, but in the flesh, I may have to.
- The pope cannot love? - The pope can love God.
But to be seen to love anyone else would be unthinkable.
- So we'll find ways to accommodate our affections.
Something like we've always done.
- All of Rome knows you're the mother to my children.
Not only must the pope be chaste; he must be seen to be chaste.
- The children.
You can be seen to love them, no? - Of course! - I always knew this day would come.
As long as you are with me in spirit - I always will be.
- And with no one else.
- That is equally impossible, Vannozza.
- So we take vows of chastity along with your new status? Must we take vows of poverty too? - Poverty? God forbid! - For the ceremonial procession, horses, arms and livery for 700 priests and 23 cardinals with their retinues, knights, and grandees.
For Pope Alexander, a ceremonial throne constructed by Florentine master builders, gold and silver plated.
[Drumming and cheering.]
For the Borgia family, a brocaded carriage, gold inlaid, refurbished in Venice.
- You look beautiful, Mother.
But you must try to remember you're not in mourning.
- But perhaps I am.
- Like you are losing your family? The life we have lived.
- What are we gaining? - The future.
[Crowd cheering.]
[Bells ringing.]
*** [Choral music.]
[Cheering and applause.]
[Bells ringing.]
- Step! Step! - Take the tiara which is ornamented with three crowns and be aware that you are father of kings and monarchs, lord of the globe, earthly resident of our Lord Jesus Christ, our Redeemer, who shall have the power and the glory forever and ever.
Amen.
His Holiness, Pope Alexander Sixtus.
- That is so many titles, Cesare.
What will his family call him now? - Holy Father.
- Holy Father.
- That's easy.
Even I can remember that.
- grants to all faithful here present a plenary indulgence - And tell me, dear brother-- - What, sis? - What must I call myself? Holy Daughter? - You are still Lucrezia Borgia, my love.
You will only change your name when you marry.
- And when will I marry? - Never, if I can help it.
- But surely it is good to marry, Cesare? - As the pope's daughter, you will have every prince of Europe vying for your hand.
They may care very little for your heart.
- Perhaps I should do as you have done, brother-- take Holy Orders.
Give my heart to God.
- That might be the safer option, my love.
- Does Papa have so many enemies? - As our father, perhaps not.
But as pope - I am Rodrigo Borgia no longer.
I am Alexander Sixtus.
- But you know who you are.
My father, still.
- I am no longer "I".
I am "we".
[Sighing.]
We felt so alone out there.
When the crown touched our head.
Humbled, even.
Even frightened.
- You surprise me, Father.
- You would surprise yourself if such destiny ever brushed against you.
Quite alone with just the silence of God as your witness.
- But He must already be pleased, Holy Father.
[Sighing with relief.]
- Ahhh! Indeed? [Inhaling deeply.]
Why? - Because the earth has not yet swallowed us.
- Here we are.
You must help me, Cesare.
You must help me interpret the great silence of God.
- [Cesare.]
: Wait! Let me! Come.
- Help me do His will.
We have been entrusted with the keys to His kingdom.
- The King of France must be aware, Ambassador, that we have placed the papal mitre in the hands of an ape.
- He has hopes, Cardinal, that the office brings its own grace with it, and that the grace of God can transform the worst of men.
- And if it doesn't? - We will observe with interest what harm a mitred ape can do.
- Hm.
- These offices we grant in the full expectation they will be used wisely for the restoration of the honour of our Holy Mother Church.
Dominus vobiscum.
- [All.]
: Dominus vobiscum.
- And, finally, the greatest office in our gift, the post of Vice-Chancellor, the office that stands a reed's width from our papacy.
We grant the most august, the most valued colleague, the brightest hope for the future of the Church, Cardinal Ascanio Sforza.
[Cardinals murmuring.]
- Simony! I charge you now in public with trading sacred offices like a market huckster! - May I remind the cardinal he is in consistry.
- Perhaps we misheard him.
- That office was promised to me.
- Ah.
Did you pay for it? - With my acceptance of your foul election.
- When the pope pledges to banish all suspicion of simony from the cardinalate, he keeps his word.
God has chosen us as a new broom to sweep the Vatican clean of corruption, which is precisely why we choose one who has no expectation of advancement-- Cardinal Sforza.
- And I pray I may prove worthy of the honour.
- And I pray so too.
In fact, I fully approve of his new broom.
[Cardinals muttering.]
Kiss the ring, you fool.
- As do I.
And I deeply regret my recent intemperance.
In honour of his appointment, I invite Cardinal Sforza, and Your Holiness and the College of Cardinals to a banquet at my palace in two days' time.
[Cardinals murmuring.]
- Are you going to share it with me? - Share what, Holy Father? - Why you bring a monkey to a banquet? - Oh, I fear the other cardinals might not share your appetite for reformation.
- And your monkey does? - Why, yes.
He is an excellent judge of appetite.
- Huh! Reform to our Holy Mother Church may happen slowly, but God has spoken to me as he spoke to my predecessor, Pope Innocent.
Happen it must.
- Shall we dine on gruel tonight, then, Your Holiness? I could inform my cooks.
- We are your guests tonight, My Lord Cardinal.
We will dine according to your choosing.
- Thank goodness.
I can have the wine poured? - Let me taste that.
- It is of an excellent vintage, My Lord.
- I have no doubt.
- Oh! [Laughing.]
- And how is his palate? - Well, it's superb.
He salutes your good taste.
- Thank you.
- A great wine, like the papacy itself-- mature, rounded, its roots in the soil, its bouquet in the heavens, consumed by a monkey.
- I suspect a metaphor is lurking there, My Lord Cardinal? - We are but animals blessed with an eternal soul.
There go we, but for the grace of God.
- [Cesare.]
: It seems nature, not metaphor, calls.
[Laughing.]
He begs Your Lordship's pardon.
[Laughing.]
Excuse me.
Excuse my monkey.
Why such a hurry? My God, you're fast.
- For a cook.
And you for a cleric.
- On kitchen duty? - For tonight.
- Who pays you? - Cardinal Orsini.
- Whatever you're being paid, I'll double it.
I could use someone that fast.
- You could? - Oh, yeah.
But not that stupid! - Far from stupidity, sire.
I imagine from your offer that you have need of me, yes? So to kill the servant you have need of would indeed be stupid.
- Call me stupid, then.
Tell me, tell me why I shouldn't.
Hmm? - Because of the sixth commandment, thou shalt not kill.
- I'll be forgiven.
The pope is my confessor.
- Because you'll never meet another assassin like me.
- Are you sure? - Yes.
[Grunting furiously.]
But we were talking terms, yes? - We were.
- I would gladly work for the pope or the pope's son, for these cardinals can, as you know, prove fickle, and it seems someone as pitiless as you-- - Yes? - Needs someone as pitiless as me.
- Elaborate.
- I have smothered infants in their beds.
But only when their parents paid me.
- And in the powder? - Eternal life.
- For whom? - You.
Your father.
- It's not very subtle.
- No subtlety needed tonight.
They all want you dead.
- Serve this to Orsini.
[Quiet murmuring.]
- Your Grace.
You are bleeding.
- Damned monkey bit me.
- Animals will do that.
They lack soul.
- I propose a toast.
To harmony, amongst us, servants of God.
- Harmony.
- To the communion of saints and the forgiveness of sins.
- Amen.
- Amen.
I'd like to propose a second toast.
To metaphor.
- [Cesare.]
: Why metaphor? - Because she's so infinitely pliable.
A prince one minute, a monkey the next.
And what her hidden meaning is only God in His infinite wisdom knows.
- I propose another toast.
To monkeys.
- Monkeys? - They lick your hand one minute, bite your neck the next.
And everyone knows what you do with the monkey that bites you.
- And what do you do with the monkey that bites you? [Choking.]
- Your Eminence, you're ill.
- You wring its neck.
- [Orsini.]
: Poison.
- Poison! - I accuse! - The cooks? Come, Father.
[Choking.]
- [Man.]
: Send for help! - The poison was meant for us.
- That's not possible.
- We were saved by a monkey, Father.
- You don't poison the pope! - Are you aware what the gossips call you? The mitred ape.
Half of Rome was waiting to celebrate this outcome-- - You poison a rat, you poison a rabid dog! Not the Vicar of Rome, not the heir to St.
Peter! - [Man.]
: Bring my carriage! - The idea offends you? - It offends me, it offends nature, it offends God Himself! - So, God will take His revenge, then.
- Yes, He will.
With our help.
- Go! - [Man.]
: Yah! Closed Captioning by SETTE inc.