The Persuaders (1971) s01e01 Episode Script

Come in.
Did you get them? Let's see.
Good.
- Now we just fill in the names.
- You've made your final choice? Yes.
Will you get me those files, please? That is one of them.
An Englishman.
A titled Englishman - Lord Brett Sinclair.
- What do you know about him? - Everything.
- Will he fall for it? - If we're clever enough.
Who's the other? That is something different.
An American.
Danny Wilde.
About him, I don't know everything.
There are blank areas in his background, but I know enough.
You think you can snare him too? I've got to.
One without the other is no good, I need both.
- Why these? - They each have something, but jointly, like chemicals Take two relatively harmless compounds - say, nitro and glycerine - mix them both together and you have a potent combination.
Handle it carelessly and it could blow your head off.
I like the analogy.
Nitro and glycerine, and I light the fuse.
Mr Wilde.
Excuse me, sir.
We're coming into Nice Airport.
Oh, I didn't know we took off.
This is it.
Nous sommes arrivés.
Oh Next.
Goodbye, it was nice to see you.
- Bye-bye.
- Goodbye, my dear.
Nice to see you.
Have a nice time while you're here.
Oh, I'm going! Thank Sir Louis for the use of his plane.
Monsieur Wilde.
Thank you.
Au revoir and merci bien.
How.
Hey! Yeah, you.
Move your car, please.
Thank you very much.
Do that in your bedroom! Will you get out of the way? # This old town is a-getting gloomy # Feel the cold winds blowing through me every day # Wheels are turning into motion # We could ride the wide blue ocean # Come our way # Like the bird, we'll soon be flying way up in the sky # And for a while, forget your worries, say goodbye # Gotta get away # Once we're heading down the track # Gotta get away # Then there'll be no turning back # Gotta get away # Where the sky is blue above # And the sun shines down on love # Gotta get away # Leave behind the stormy weather # We can find the sun together # Come what may # Join the once-a-year migration # Heading for some destination far away # We can touch a new horizon # Way out in the blue # A brave new world is waiting there for me and you # Gotta get away # Once we're heading down the track # Gotta get away # Then there'll be no turning back # Gotta get away # Where the sky is blue above # And the sun shines down on love # Gotta get away # So, if you hear me # Knocking at your door Don't wait a minute more # Come out and join me # We just gotta try # Until we're flying high # This old town is a-getting gloomy # Feel the cold winds blowing through me every day # # Wheels are turning into motion # We could ride the wide blue ocean # Come our way # Like the bird, we'll soon be flying way up in the sky # And for a while, forget your worries, say goodbye # Gotta get away # Once we're heading down the track # Gotta get away # Then there'll be no turning back # Gotta get away # Where the sky is blue above # And the sun shines down on love # Gotta get away # Why, you little Lord Sinclair, how good to see you again.
- Henri, nice to be back again.
- Your usual suite is prepared.
By the way, Henri, who sent this invitation? Be my guest at the Hotel de Paris.
It's going to be a ball.
I don't know who sent it.
We're instructed to charge this to the Banque de France.
Well, start charging and send up a bellboy with the luggage.
Or maybe a bellgirl.
"Belle" girl Forget it.
You see, we were told that your wishes were our command.
An attitude which I Good evening.
Two Creole Screams, please.
- Monsieur? - Two Creole - Are you new here? - Yes, monsieur.
Next to women, a man's best friend is a Creole Scream.
- Are you listening? - Certainly.
A jigger of white rum.
A dash of chilled vermouth, not iced.
And a measure of grenadine.
Then mix.
Stir in some crushed ice, shake, strain and pour.
- Top it off with one olive - Two - Did you speak? - No.
No, I said two.
You were perfect up until the olives.
Two olives - you can see them gently bounce up against each other.
W-well, I'm afraid the spectacle of two olives bouncing against each other is one I'll forgo.
- One.
- Bust up a pair? - Why not? - It's cruel.
Two.
You'll thank me for this.
Allow me to make up my own mind.
One.
Excuse me.
Your mind, but not the drink's.
Two.
I ought to know - it's an American drink.
It's from a southern state, invented by an English gentleman.
One olive.
- I didn't know that.
- You do now.
I'm only trying to do you a favour.
Oh, then why don't you leave the bar? Or the restaurant? Or, better still, the country? - Listen, friend - Do NOT call me friend.
People might think you're serious.
- Are you looking for a fight? - No Are you? - I wasn't, but I am now.
- You have an endearing honesty.
Yeah.
Inside or outside? I choose inside - there's no air-conditioning outside.
- Lord Sinclair, please! - Don't worry, Bruno.
All damages will be paid for.
Lord Sinclair? I never did it to a lord before! Another endearing quality optimism.
I'm terrible sorry, I must have slipped.
Just stand there.
Mind your own business.
Sit down, my dear.
This won't take a moment.
- I don't need your help.
- I'm helping this gentleman.
Any help? - You lords fight dirty! - That's how we became lords.
Besides, I adapt myself to the company I keep.
People like you give English tourists a bad name.
Will you butt out? It's a trick I learnt from a friend.
Go right ahead.
Well, never trust a friend! Can't you be a little more careful? The poor man! Sorry Arrest that maniac.
How much was the damage? Are you going to tell me, or not? Not! I want to pay my share.
How much was it? I wouldn't hear of it.
I'm insisting.
It is traditional.
What's traditional? The winner always pays.
The winner? What winner? - What were we doing tonight? - You mean the fi Winner?! - You're lucky to be standing.
- Oh, something's wrong.
- You're frail.
- What? - You must have been a weak kid.
- Are you starting again? - Inside or outside? - We have no choice.
- Go ahead.
- Right.
Perhaps it's an open prison? Yeah, maybe it is.
Hey, whatsyourname, come here.
- Wanna take a look? - Not particularly.
I wish you wouldn't do that.
- Does Liberace live here? - No, Count Dracula's birthday.
Ssh.
Hey, look at this.
A photograph of you.
Here's another one.
Here's one of me.
And photographs of us.
- Look at - What else is there? Newspaper clippings Good evening, gentlemen.
Please, sit down.
Do make yourselves comfortable, gentlemen.
Oh, you prefer to stand, Mr Wilde.
- It's a habit.
- Ah, yes.
A legacy of those days in the Bronx, I imagine.
However, you will have a drink.
A Creole Scream for you, Lord Sinclair, with one olive.
You see? And for you, Mr Wilde, with two olives.
Thanks a lot.
Well, thank you, sir.
Although I do feel at a disadvantage.
Well, you are both still under arrest.
Your health, gentlemen.
How would you like three months in jail? My name is Fulton.
I was a judge, I have now retired.
But don't let that mislead you.
Without any details, I can promise you three months inside.
He makes it sound like a prize.
of a fine.
No remission.
I can arrange it.
Or, I might arrange it.
Yes, let's say that.
Often.
Irrepressible, optimistic, courageous, and a sense of humour.
Those are great qualities, Mr Wilde.
Qualities that pulled you out of a New York slum to the top of the financial tree.
You have made and lost several fortunes.
Now, money making's so easy for you that you don't bother.
You have a remarkable talent, Mr Wilde.
But what have you done with it? You just drift around the world, gambling and womanising.
What have you done with those qualities? What have you achieved over the past few years? Oh, you've wasted yourself, Mr Wilde.
You were a nothing who became something.
And now, you're a nothing again.
In fact, you're no better than Lord Sinclair, here.
Lord Brett Sinclair.
Now, that was once a proud and noble name.
A name that fought for justice and defended freedom.
But what have you done with it? You are a first-class athlete.
You're an art connoisseur.
A gourmet, with a lusty taste in wine and women.
And you speak how many languages, six? - Seven.
- Seven And you only use them to order cocktails.
Yours is the glib tongue at a hundred mindless parties.
Lord Brett Sinclair, born with a silver spoon in his mouth.
All he does is lick the jam from it.
Two adult men, both with immense potential, - and you fight over an olive! - Two olives.
You're both facile and foolish and a waste of humanity.
But you like to fight All right, I'll give you a fight.
I'll either make use of you, or I'll see you serve three months.
- That's blackmail.
- What do we do? Hold on, this is coercion! He means business.
That's three months, right? - 90 days.
- I can count.
And nights.
What do we have to do? It's a question of identification.
- Well, er, I like it.
- Stunning.
She says she's Maria Lorenzo, but if she's who I think she is, she'll have a heart-shaped birthmark on her back.
- Who do you think she is? - That's for you to find out.
All we have to do is see whether she has a birthmark? Just check her out? Right.
That's your choice, gentlemen.
A simple task, or 90 days.
- We're convinced.
- Oh, yes.
We're convinced.
Are you sure she's here? I don't wish to be sure.
It's the uncertainties that add spice to life.
You must get a lot of them, the way you look and everything.
- What's wrong with how I look? - Nothing, really.
Maybe a little too dignified, not enough razzmatazz.
- Would you do me a favour? - Fix your car? No.
If you ever see razzmatazz on my shoulder, brush it off.
Funny, funny, funny Eh? - OK, leave her to me.
- Us.
Right, I'll do it in ten minutes.
We are, regrettably, in this together.
Besides, I plan to pose as an intrepid explorer just returned with my latest discovery - a gibbering apeman.
Yes, simple - you just continue to gibber.
Well, I've got a better plan.
You're swimming and drown.
- And you save me? - No, I hold you under.
I've got a better idea.
We'll toss for it.
Simple as that.
Nothing could be fairer.
Heads, I win.
Tails, you lose.
Tails, you lose.
See you later.
Oh, I forgot.
Incredible! - Incredible, just incredible! - What's incredible? - Your face.
- Is something wrong with it? Not at all.
You don't mind if I sit down? Thank you.
- It's beautiful.
- Please go away.
Do you know, it was probably your great-great-grandmother? - What about her? - Do you know Milan? - Very well, indeed.
- Oh, this is outside of Milan.
A small village called Pozzolini.
There's a chapel there called the Shrine of the Grandees.
The Grandees are Spanish.
That's why it's unique, it's an Italian-Spanish village.
It's baffled historians for years.
Can I help you? Please go away.
This chapel, I go there a lot.
I've got a feeling for these joints I mean places.
- It gets me here - Will you please go away? Well, there's this painting on the wall of a heart er, girl.
She's reputed to be the most beautiful girl in all of Italy.
I love to go and look and look.
It makes a man feel humble.
Somebody else is trying to make time with her.
Here.
- Do you know him? - No.
It could be another poolside Romeo.
- Check him out.
- Right.
Please, tell me what your name is.
- Maria.
- Maria.
I love it.
It sounds so romantic.
You must love it yourself.
Excuse me, is this man bothering you? - Is he your friend? - I'm his psychiatrist.
If he's been bothering you, I apologise Would you go away and stop bothering me? - He follows me everywhere.
- You see? Persecution mania.
Allow me to introduce myself.
Brett Sinclair.
Brett to my friends, but you may call me darling.
Oh-ho.
Oh, no.
Now we've got two of them.
- So, lunch? - How about a swim? Yes.
I declare today a public holiday.
- The three of us? - We'll need a butler.
Give me five minutes to change.
- We'll see you in the lobby.
- Uh-huh.
Ciao.
- Did you get a look? - No.
- I have left my bag.
- Here it is.
In the lobby.
Well, her real name and we're off to the races.
Get her key and we'll search her room.
- Like taking candy from a baby.
- So I noticed.
I believe that this will do the trick.
I believe it will deceive them.
It contains a great deal of information about Maria.
And manufactured evidence to link Wilde and Sinclair with me.
Now, put it in Wilde's room.
Where it can be found.
If my superiors find out I'm helping you I'll be dismissed.
Yes, I know, Inspector Flavel.
I appreciate what you're doing.
I'm sure you realise it's in the best possible cause.
Perhaps, but I think you're wrong about this.
We'll soon know the truth.
If you're right, this will put those two men in serious danger.
But if they're half the men I believe, they'll be OK.
For their sakes I hope so.
Yes, I hope so, too.
- Here we are.
- Thanks for a lovely day.
I'll see you at eight.
- We'll call for you.
- Oh, no.
I'll see you there.
I didn't get it.
- When? - Since we started out.
Why you Since we started out - Come in, we've been waiting.
- What do you want? What do you mean by coming to my room? Those two men, Maria, you're not to see them again.
Why? Why not? Just take my word for it, huh? Don't see them again.
I'm having dinner with them tonight.
Yes.
And this time you're not going to spoil things.
Every time I meet somebody I like, you stop me seeing them.
Only the ones who could be dangerous.
It's our job.
I don't care about your job.
For once I've enjoyed myself.
You think they have no motive for squiring you around? No! Why should they have? I'm sorry, Maria.
I found this in the American's room.
Chapter and verse on you.
Everything you've done since you were six year's old.
I don't know whether they're police or press, but you don't see them again.
I'm very sorry.
But this time it's bad.
So bad, I'm taking you out of town.
Where? I can't say, but there's someone I want you to meet.
- Do I have a choice? - No.
Get your coat, please.
I want to tell them I won't be meeting them for dinner.
Triver will take care of that.
Tell them, Triver, she can't make it for dinner.
Yeah I'll tell 'em.
A table for three, please.
Hi.
I am sorry, m'lord.
We are full.
Bruno, tonight we are at peace with the world.
Ten workmen have laboured ceaselessly to redecorate.
And they've done a fine job, eh, pal? That is an understatement.
- Pal? - Yeah, my buddy.
Your differences have been settled? As you can see, our relationship is one of harmony.
Then I should be pleased to serve you.
Oh, Bruno In the middle of dinner, call me to the telephone.
Naturally, m'lord.
You just keep her talking.
Try not to bore her to death.
S-sit down.
- Friends of yours? - Er, I don't think so.
Why don't you find a chair? Maria won't be coming tonight.
I guess he's from the telegraph company.
Then why doesn't he sing the message? - Maybe he can't sing? - He looks like a baritone.
- You want some advice? - I suppose we'll get it anyway.
- Please, go ahead.
- Get out of town.
Well, that's easier said than done.
- You've got to pack and - True.
There's something else.
Don't see Maria again.
Don't ever see her.
I think he's trying to tell us something.
- You're putting me on.
- No.
All right, if I can't tell you, then I'll have to show you.
Mine won't go down.
You're not getting enough power into it.
Look.
Oof! - Did you see that? How was it? - Much better.
We'd better go.
Put it on my tab.
We'll be in for lunch.
- Maria! - Say it softly Maria.
You don't have to scream.
- Lock it.
- Right.
Are you always nervous in a lady's bedroom? We've got 90 days hanging over us, don't make it six years! - Then start searching.
- Right.
I wonder where Maria is.
She could tell us about her beefy boyfriends.
Well, as far as I'm concerned, that can remain a secret.
I just want to discover her real name and get out.
I say, Daniel.
Oh, I'll buy you one.
In blue.
I think I've got something.
There.
Michelle Annette Dupont.
That's it.
We know her name, she's got a birthmark.
- We're clear, no 90 days! - Let's tell the judge.
Excellent! Excellent! Oh, gentlemen, this calls for a celebration! A free drink's better than a night Oh, that was here when I rented the villa.
Years of courtroom technique have given me a flair for drama.
And finally, you searched her room.
You were seen by somebody, I hope? Seen? - Forgive me, I'm confused.
- Me also.
OK, she's got a birthmark on her back and her real name is Michelle Annette Dupont.
But you seem more concerned in how we did it.
Of course.
I've always known she was Michelle Dupont.
All right, so it went wrong.
What do you want done now? You mean it? Fulton? And the two guys.
All right, but permanent this time.
Right.
You see, I had to set a red rag to a bull.
Well, you provided the red rag, I also planted some information which made you look dangerous to the people I'm after.
Stage one is accomplished.
- We had a deal.
- The matter of 90 days.
Oh, that's all forgiven.
- Did you hear that? - I did.
Wait! You still could help.
Your Judgeship, you could talk all night, we're not staying Where are you going? - To get the lights.
- I've been looking for you.
I didn't think they'd go so far.
There's a pistol in my desk.
- Can I go this way.
- Turn left.
- All this because of Maria? - Of course.
- You set us up.
- I had to.
Marac's hit! Let's go! Come on, hurry.
Get outta here.
Now look, wise guy.
You'd better have a good reason why you suckered us into this.
Does the name Robert Dupont mean anything to you? Nothing, except that Maria's surname is Dupont.
Robert was her brother.
Robert Dupont, the racketeer? He's dead.
He was shot two years ago.
Forgive me, but the name means nothing to me.
Robert Dupont was a racketeer who ran the whole Mediterranean crime syndicate.
He was a fink and a hood.
I'm sorry, The Times devotes little space to finks and hoods.
- But I gather he wasn't nice.
- An evil man.
- But he's dead.
- His body was never found.
After his death they expected the usual struggle for power, but it never happened.
- What did? - Nothing.
The whole organisation went on working as smoothly as ever.
Which leads to the conclusion Precisely.
Oh, stop it! Stop it! How long do we have to stay here? Hello, Michelle.
I'm sorry I kept the truth from you for so long.
I was ill and needed a new identity.
It has taken so much time.
Why couldn't you have told me? I wanted to, but it was safer for you not to know.
They would have tried to get at me through you.
That's why Coley screened everybody you talked to.
You should have told me Trusted me.
Perhaps.
But now everything is all right.
I have a new face, name, background.
I am almost safe.
Almost safe? One man still believes I didn't die.
After tonight, there'll be no one.
You see, if it seemed that I was investigating Maria, sooner or later, Dupont would have to stop me.
- Tonight proves that.
- You let us in for this? I hoped they'd make you angry enough to see this through.
You make me angry! You think I'd risk my life, or his? You've gotta be Come along, Stanley.
Discretion is the better part of valour.
I can't ask any more of you.
I'll, from here on, go it alone.
Goodnight.
Goodnight, sir.
Would you believe that guy! Outrageous.
Trying to put us in the middle.
Who needs it? Certainly not I.
- Look at the road.
- Certainly not l Do you suppose he meant what he said about going it alone? Oh, I think so.
He's a tough old guy.
Imagine us up against Dupont! Well, it would be a challenge.
Oh, definitely.
- We've got other things to do.
- Absolutely.
What have you got to do? - Nothing.
- Certainly not I.
Me neither.
We gotta be nut cases! We don't like being pushed around, do we? Would you hurry? Try a forward gear There's no hint as to where this Dupont may be.
And you? - This comes from a vineyard.
- What? It's full of wine-making equipment.
There's nothing here but a label.
Hey, I think we're in the right place.
- Why? - Look.
- You could be right.
- Yes.
OK, OK, OK.
OK! Why, I shoulda taken their guns and - Why didn't you? - I'm a coward.
Hi, Judge.
Gentlemen, I know this will sound ridiculously inadequate, but, er Well, under the circumstances, I offer you my apologies.
That's OK.
We decided to help you.
- That was our first mistake.
- Possibly your last.
- Break it to us gently.
- They'll kill us.
- They have to kill us.
- I thought it was serious Now, everything has been covered, you're sure of that? - Positive.
- Good, good.
See how the others are coming along.
Why, Judge? - Why? - Why your involvement in this? I sat as a judge for 15 years.
During that time I tried to defend the innocent and punish the guilty.
The guilty ones that came to court, that is.
One anomaly of the law is that in protecting the innocent the guilty often go free, too.
Since my retirement I've tried to redress that, in my own way.
In fact, it's become an obsession.
You see, now I have time to think, to study, to search for loopholes that others might have overlooked.
To ferret out, to chase an idea.
Oh, you think I'm a crazy old man.
No, you're one of the sanest men I ever met.
- I've done it! - The lock? No, I've broke my fingernail.
You are wasting your time.
I've searched the whole area.
There is no way out.
I suggest we all have a drink.
Then let's get it over.
Stay here.
Please let them go.
# Dear old pals, jolly old pals # Always together # In all kinds of weather # - Our dancing partners.
- We have guests.
Take them outside.
- How'd you like a little wine? - How do you do? There's no reason to be so nervous.
OK, leave him.
Behind you! - Daniel, come on - I'm coming, believe me! Order in court! I will have order! Very nice.
Come along.
Open up, Judge.
Quickly! Judge, OK, lock 'em up and stay out of everybody's way.
Six months for contempt and bodily harm.
Imagine that, a girl shooting her own brother! Maybe she didn't like him.
The bill, please, I'm checking out.
I think she wanted to be an only child.
It's a ridiculous situation.
I'm not sorry it's over, but I really rather enjoyed it.
It's been a pleasure being with you.
- Never mention that name again.
- What name? Excuse me, Judge Fulton sent me.
Help me, I'm in trouble.
And you'd like to talk privately? Come with us, we've a nice place.
Oh, the key, please.
Thank you.
Wait.
Ooh! Come on in.
Did you think I'd leave you out there?