The Spectacular Spider-Man (2008) s01e01 Episode Script
Survival of the Fittest
1
PETER: Tell me there's
something better.
Yee-haw!
Go ahead. Try.
How I spent
my summer vacation,
by Peter Benjamin Parker.
I can sum it up in one
glorious, hyphenated word.
Spider-Man.
I am the spectacular
Spider-Man!
Only one thing missing.
It's my last night
before school starts,
and I could really
use some action.
[ALARM RINGING]
Did I tell you?
One getaway jump
to the next building,
and we're a million
bucks richer.
This ain't no
million-buck haul,
not after the Big Man
takes his cut anyway.
Aw, shut up
and jump.
[EXCLAIMS]
Oh, no.
Not again.
[MARKO GROANING]SPIDER-MAN: Yep. Again.
[CHUCKLES]
What is this, Marko?
Like, the third time
this summer?
Just wait till
I get my hands
on you,
you skinny
little creep!
Okay, so Marko,
now tell me,
the new Spider-signal,
too much?
It's my first night
trying it out,
and I'm just not sure
it screams "Friendly
neighborhood Spider-Man."
[GROANS]Be brutal.
I mean, as a guy
with a lot of experience
getting thrashed
by, well, me,
I really value
your opinion.
BIG MAN:
This is a live feed?
Then I've
seen enough.
Summon the Enforcers.
Already on their way.
Livin' on the edge
Fighting crime
Spinning webs
Swingin' from
the highest ledge
He could leap
above our heads
Villains on the rise
And the city's victimized
Looking up
with no surprise
Arriving in the
speed of time
Spectacular
Spectacular Spider-Man
Spectacular
Spectacular Spider-Man
Spectacular
Spectacular
Spectacular Spider-Man
Spectacular
Spectacular Spider-Man
PETER:
I've never been so pumped
for the first day of school,
because today,
everything changes.
AUNT MAY: It isn't getting
any easier, Anna.
We're almost
out of money.
ANNA: But May,
I'm sure Ben left
Ben Parker was many,
many wonderful things,
but a financial wizard
he was not.
[SIGHS]
I miss him so.
Oh, but listen
to me go on.
We'll manage.
And please, not
a word of this to Peter.
I wouldn't want him
to be concerned.
[COUGHS]
Hey, Aunt May.
How's the most beautiful girl
in Forest Hills this morning?
[LAUGHS]
Peter.
Now hurry off.
You don't wanna be late
on your first day.
No, ma'am.
TOOMES:
I blame you for this.
You told me to bring
my magnetic air-transport
system to OsCorp.
I know, butYou arranged the meeting
with Norman Osborn.
And I had the best
intentions.
He studied my ideas
and rejected them,
then announces
OsCorp's tech-flight
four months later!
[STAMMERING]
I am sorry, Adrian.
Don't you dare apologize,
Doctor.
OsCorp has nothing
to apologize for.
Nothing to
Osborn, you stole my work!
That's dangerous talk,
Mr. Toomes.
Dangerous
and unsupportable.
Listen,
you old buzzard.
You've been at this
for decades without
one success to your name.
If you never accomplished
anything as a young man,
who'd believe
you created tech-flight
as an old one?
Boys, show
Mr. Toomes out.
Good news.
I don't blame
you anymore.
[BLOWS]
PETER: All right,
the Parkers are desperate
for cold, hard cash,
but I'm not letting that
spoil this moment.
Hey, Pete!
Harry, Gwen,
how'd summer treat you?
Science camp was fun.
Yeah, well,
the world tour stunk.
My dad spent
the whole trip
locked in boardrooms,
so I spent mine
locked in boredom.
I should have
stayed in town
with you, Pete.
At least we could've
done nothing together.
But now we're back.
So, you ready
for the torture
that is M cubed?
It'll be different now.
Really? 'Cause you spent
half sophomore year
stuffed in a locker.
Pete?
Where you going?
PETER:
To face my destiny.
Peter Parker's a wall-crawler,
not a wallflower,
and my life
is about to change.
[STAMMERING]
Uh, Sally?
What's he
Is he
I think he is.
SALLY:
Are you damaged?BOTH: He did.
Why in the world
do you think
I'd ever go out
with Midtown High's
champion geek?
Hey, Rand, "Puny Parker's"
hitting on your girl.
[STAMMERING]
Rand, I didn't know
you two were
It's cool.Cool?
You don't care?
Why? You wanna
go out with him?
I want to walk on
a Parker-free planet,
thank you very much.
[ALL LAUGHING]
Lucky you didn't try this
with my girl, Parker.
If your geek sweat got
within one mile of Liz
Back off, Flash.
I won't be your
punching bag anymore.
Things have changed.
[EXCLAIMS]
[STUDENTS LAUGHING]
You hear him
threaten me, dude?
Nerd thinks
he's Spider-Man.
Mmm.
Pound cake.
[SIGHS]
My lunch!
[FOOTSTEPS APPROACHING]
Come on.
The Big Man
wants a word.
Enforcers
all present and
accounted for, boss.
BIG MAN:
Thank you, Hammerhead.
Gentlemen, I'll get
right to the point.
For the last four months,
a pest has plagued
our operations.
At first, I could hardly
credit the reports.
Thought the boys
were trying to stiff us.
Had to get a little
rough to make sure
they was sincere.
Establishing
patterns of movement
took all summer,
but last night,
we had confirmation.
The Spider-Man is real.
And you want the Enforcers
to wrangle up
this here spider.
No, Montana.
I want you
to squash it.
[BELL RINGING]
Chapter one by tomorrow,
ladies and gentlemen.
Mr. Parker, Miss Stacy,
a word.
I wonder if either of you
remember a field trip
we took last year
to the laboratory of
Dr. Curtis Connors
at Empire State University.
[EXCLAIMS]
[HEART BEATING]
[HEART BEATS ACCELERATING]
[CHUCKLES]
Trust me.
That's one field trip
I'll never forget.
Me neither. Dr. Connors'
research was thrilling.
I'm glad you
feel that way,
because he's offering
two internships
to promising high schoolers.
I recommended
my two star pupils.
You start
this afternoon.
PETER: Thanks for
letting me kill time
at your place, Harry.
[SIGHS]
I'm not due at the
E.S.U. lab for another hour.
I'm just surprised
you're not hanging
at the school paper.
Aren't you their
star photographer
or something?
Not anymore.
Someone else
can take pictures
of Flash prancing
around the gridiron.
I'll be too busy
raking in the green.
Is this part of
the same reality
where Sally Avril's your
A minor setback.
But at least this
lab job solves
the Parker money problems.
I mean, look around.
All this belongs
to your dad,
and he's a scientist.
NORMAN: Boys,
come out here.
I couldn't
help overhearing.
I'm sorry,
Mr. Osborn. I
Don't you dare
apologize, son.
I never do.
So what's this
about a lab job?
At E.S.U., working
with Curt Connors.
Connors, huh?
Quite an opportunity.
Don't suppose
you were considered
for the honor, Harry?
No, sir.
It's totally not
a big deal, Mr. O,
but thanks.
We'll get out
of your way now.
Osborn!
[GASPS]
Dad.
[NORMAN SCREAMS]
What do we do?
I
Call the cops.
Do it. Go!
Tell the truth, Osborn.
Can your tech-flight do this?
[NORMAN SCREAMS]
Toomes?
Not Toomes now.
I'm what you called me.
I'm the Vulture.
I called you
a buzzard.What?
You can't even
get the name right.
[SCREAMS]
Toomes, stop.
What will any
of this accomplish?
A means to an end,
Osborn.
Something you know
all about.
You will announce
to the world
that Adrian Toomes
is the genius
behind tech-flight.
You will pay me
all that I am owed,
and you will publicly
apologize for
stealing my invention!
I never apologize,
old man.
I may be an old man,
but I'm not a patient one.
[SCREAMS]
[SCREAMING]
SPIDER-MAN:
Whoa, guys, you play
hot potato hardcore.
What is this?
These skies
are mine now!
SPIDER-MAN:
He may be right.
I really just rent.
What are you
babbling about?
Put me down!
Dude, you are the bossiest
damsel in distress
I have ever rescued.
Also the ugliest,
heaviest and the first.
BOTH: Who are you?
Why, I'm your
friendly neighborhood
Spider-Man, of course.
Spider-Man?
I thought you were
a myth.
Man, I need
a new press agent.
He's not helping, Stan.
The perps he nabs almost
always walk and
[GASPS]SPIDER-MAN:
Heads up.
[GRUNTS]
What's going on?Explanations inside!
Now!
Look, beaky, I admire
anyone who dresses up
as their favorite animal,
and better still,
you can fly.
So I gotta ask.
You heard the one
about great power coming
with great responsibility?
[SNARLS]
Whoa! Beaky,
don't fly away mad.
The name
is Vulture!
[STAMMERING]
That's great, Harry.
I'm glad that your dad's safe.
Me? Well, you know, I tried
to follow 'em on foot,
and I ran for blocks,
but
Yeah, I guess
that was pretty useless.
Hey, look, I'm late,
and Gwen's giving me
the look, so bye.
I so was not
giving you the look.
But I am late,
right?
EDDIE: Always, bro.
Eddie!Hey, Gwen.
Bro, what are you
doing here?
Work here.
I'm the Connors'
personal lab assistant.
Not bad for a frosh,
huh?
[CHUCKLES]
Eddie Brock's a freshman.
College freshman,
little man.
But I'm guessing
you're missing me
at Midtown High, huh?
No one to keep
Flash Thompson
off your back?
Stole your shoes
again, huh?
[CLEARS THROAT]
Peter Parker,
Gwen Stacy,
I'd like you to meet
Dr. Martha Connors.
Eddie's told us great things
about you both.
Said you wore
clean underwear.
Lucky I didn't
say socks.
[BEEPS]MARTHA: Curt,
stop hiding in the office.
New interns are here.
I'll be right out.
Peter, Gwen, this is
E.S.U.'s resident genius,
my husband, Curt.
It's an honor to
meet you, Dr. Connors.
You look familiar, son.
Weren't you the boy
that was bit
By the science bug.
You know it!
MARTHA: Now,
we won't overdo it
the first day.
Eddie will show you
around the lab,
but the real work
can start tomorrow.
So, questions welcome.
Here's one.
What does
this gig pay?
Pete, you're
a high school kid
with zero experience.
You're not getting paid.
[PETER SIGHS]
Aunt May needs my help.
I don't know
what I'm gonna do.
Oh, Pete,
don't angst, okay?
It'll come to you.
Well, I'm waiting!
You gotta admit,
the girl knows her stuff.
Oh. Today's been
one-stop shopping
for disappointment.
No money at home,
no cool at school,
I nearly pavement splat
fighting a wacko with wings,
and nowDaily Bugle security
won't even let me
use the elevator.
But May and Ben Parker
didn't raise no quitters.
Any quitters.
You get the idea.
[PEOPLE CHATTERING]
JAMESON:
Get that downstairs now!
Robbie,
where's my layout?
Foswell,
I ordered that rewrite
12 seconds ago.
Lee, I'm not paying you
to sit on your keister!
And you!Me?
Yeah, you! I sent you
for my bagel and schmear
nine minutes ago.
You sent Benny,
Mr. Jameson, and it's
only been three minutes.
Actually, sir,
I've got something
better than a bagel.
Oh, yeah?
What's that?
A proposal.
I think I can get
you pictures,
photos of Spider-Man
in action.
I bet it would sell
a lot of newspapers.
What do you know
about selling papers?
You're a kid!
Worse, you're a teenager.
Miss Brant, call security.
Get this wailing infant
out of my face,
out of my city room,
out of my town!
Hey, what the Bugle
needs is photos of
Spider-Man in action.
Now that would sell
newspapers, huh?
[SIGHS]
Today officially reeks.
Not one thing's gone right,
and now the amazing
Spider-Man is reduced
to sneaking around
for his shoes.
All clear?
VULTURE: Osborn!
Go! Go!
You won't escape me again!
My thought exactly.
Target sighted
at last known location.
Boys, let's
squash us a bug.
[BEEPING]
SPIDER-MAN:
Trick or treat!
[GROANS]
[CHUCKLES]
I mean, you are celebrating
Halloween in September, right?
Or am I not one to talk?
[GRUNTS]
Whoa!
Huh?
Whoa!
Strangest darn gig
Big Man's ever
slid our way.
We're flying with
the freaks now, boys.
I got no idea what
that big bird's about,
but I am mighty glad
he's keeping our bug busy.
[BEEPS]Target locked.
Whoa.
My Spider-sense is
[GRUNTING]
Whoa!
[GASPS]
Ox, Fancy Dan,
you're up.
[GRUNTS]
[GROANS]
Look, pal, if you
needed a breath mint,
you just had to ask.
[GRUNTING]
[GROANS]
Oh. That's not good.
[GROANS]
MONTANA: Ah, ah, ah.
Boys need a workout.
Now, no turning tail.
Seriously,
who are you guys?
I think we lost him.
[POUNDING]
[GROANS]
It's not that I'm running,
but there's this Vulture guy
out there,
so if we could
just postpone
[GRUNTS]
You're strong.
Point taken.
But can you
do this?
[OX GROANS]Didn't think so.
Now I know
you can tear
right through that,
but I wouldn't
recommend it.
Son, you're making
the Enforcers look bad.
I can't have that.
You will apologize!I won't!
Man, this is a sweet ride.
That sunroof come standard?
Why do you defend
that thief Osborn?
Uncool!
Do you know what
these Spider-suits cost?
Never fought anyone
like this group of bozos.
Only one thing
I know for sure.
I can't let Harry
lose his dad the way
I lost Uncle Ben.
[GROANS]Surf's up!
[WHOOPS]
There!
The car park!
Go! Go!
No!
This is all your fault!
Two birds, one stone.
Where'd that varmint
get to now?
Did you really
think you could hide
from me there?
My wing!
I can't steer!
Yeah, but you're
still airborne.
How does that work,
exactly?
Yo, Vultie,
your hump's humming.
You idiot!
You've doomed us both!
[LAUGHS]
You so have not
been paying attention.
Yee-haw!
[SIRENS BLARING]
[GRUNTS]
Well, three out
of four ain't bad,
especially on bizarre
bad guy night.
Now, if I can
just get my shoes.
Oh, perfect end
to a perfect day.
Aunt May,
you're awake.
Sit down, Peter.
We need to talk.
I know you're
a good boy
and growing up to be
a fine young man,
the man
of the house now.
But you're still
my responsibility.
I can't have you
out till midnight.
You're to be home
by 10:00.
That's my bedtime.But Aunt May
If you're late,
you call before 10:00.
If you do call,
it had better be to say
you're on your way home.
That's the law
in this house, Peter.
Do we understand
each other?
[CHUCKLES]
Sure, Aunt May.
That's fair.
Lovely. Now,
how about a slice of
banana cream pie?
Okay, nothing went
as planned today.
Understatement of the year.
But I'm still Spider-Man
and still undefeated.
And I still have
this amazing person
watching out for me.
Tell me there's
something better.
Go ahead. Try.
PETER: Tell me there's
something better.
Yee-haw!
Go ahead. Try.
How I spent
my summer vacation,
by Peter Benjamin Parker.
I can sum it up in one
glorious, hyphenated word.
Spider-Man.
I am the spectacular
Spider-Man!
Only one thing missing.
It's my last night
before school starts,
and I could really
use some action.
[ALARM RINGING]
Did I tell you?
One getaway jump
to the next building,
and we're a million
bucks richer.
This ain't no
million-buck haul,
not after the Big Man
takes his cut anyway.
Aw, shut up
and jump.
[EXCLAIMS]
Oh, no.
Not again.
[MARKO GROANING]SPIDER-MAN: Yep. Again.
[CHUCKLES]
What is this, Marko?
Like, the third time
this summer?
Just wait till
I get my hands
on you,
you skinny
little creep!
Okay, so Marko,
now tell me,
the new Spider-signal,
too much?
It's my first night
trying it out,
and I'm just not sure
it screams "Friendly
neighborhood Spider-Man."
[GROANS]Be brutal.
I mean, as a guy
with a lot of experience
getting thrashed
by, well, me,
I really value
your opinion.
BIG MAN:
This is a live feed?
Then I've
seen enough.
Summon the Enforcers.
Already on their way.
Livin' on the edge
Fighting crime
Spinning webs
Swingin' from
the highest ledge
He could leap
above our heads
Villains on the rise
And the city's victimized
Looking up
with no surprise
Arriving in the
speed of time
Spectacular
Spectacular Spider-Man
Spectacular
Spectacular Spider-Man
Spectacular
Spectacular
Spectacular Spider-Man
Spectacular
Spectacular Spider-Man
PETER:
I've never been so pumped
for the first day of school,
because today,
everything changes.
AUNT MAY: It isn't getting
any easier, Anna.
We're almost
out of money.
ANNA: But May,
I'm sure Ben left
Ben Parker was many,
many wonderful things,
but a financial wizard
he was not.
[SIGHS]
I miss him so.
Oh, but listen
to me go on.
We'll manage.
And please, not
a word of this to Peter.
I wouldn't want him
to be concerned.
[COUGHS]
Hey, Aunt May.
How's the most beautiful girl
in Forest Hills this morning?
[LAUGHS]
Peter.
Now hurry off.
You don't wanna be late
on your first day.
No, ma'am.
TOOMES:
I blame you for this.
You told me to bring
my magnetic air-transport
system to OsCorp.
I know, butYou arranged the meeting
with Norman Osborn.
And I had the best
intentions.
He studied my ideas
and rejected them,
then announces
OsCorp's tech-flight
four months later!
[STAMMERING]
I am sorry, Adrian.
Don't you dare apologize,
Doctor.
OsCorp has nothing
to apologize for.
Nothing to
Osborn, you stole my work!
That's dangerous talk,
Mr. Toomes.
Dangerous
and unsupportable.
Listen,
you old buzzard.
You've been at this
for decades without
one success to your name.
If you never accomplished
anything as a young man,
who'd believe
you created tech-flight
as an old one?
Boys, show
Mr. Toomes out.
Good news.
I don't blame
you anymore.
[BLOWS]
PETER: All right,
the Parkers are desperate
for cold, hard cash,
but I'm not letting that
spoil this moment.
Hey, Pete!
Harry, Gwen,
how'd summer treat you?
Science camp was fun.
Yeah, well,
the world tour stunk.
My dad spent
the whole trip
locked in boardrooms,
so I spent mine
locked in boredom.
I should have
stayed in town
with you, Pete.
At least we could've
done nothing together.
But now we're back.
So, you ready
for the torture
that is M cubed?
It'll be different now.
Really? 'Cause you spent
half sophomore year
stuffed in a locker.
Pete?
Where you going?
PETER:
To face my destiny.
Peter Parker's a wall-crawler,
not a wallflower,
and my life
is about to change.
[STAMMERING]
Uh, Sally?
What's he
Is he
I think he is.
SALLY:
Are you damaged?BOTH: He did.
Why in the world
do you think
I'd ever go out
with Midtown High's
champion geek?
Hey, Rand, "Puny Parker's"
hitting on your girl.
[STAMMERING]
Rand, I didn't know
you two were
It's cool.Cool?
You don't care?
Why? You wanna
go out with him?
I want to walk on
a Parker-free planet,
thank you very much.
[ALL LAUGHING]
Lucky you didn't try this
with my girl, Parker.
If your geek sweat got
within one mile of Liz
Back off, Flash.
I won't be your
punching bag anymore.
Things have changed.
[EXCLAIMS]
[STUDENTS LAUGHING]
You hear him
threaten me, dude?
Nerd thinks
he's Spider-Man.
Mmm.
Pound cake.
[SIGHS]
My lunch!
[FOOTSTEPS APPROACHING]
Come on.
The Big Man
wants a word.
Enforcers
all present and
accounted for, boss.
BIG MAN:
Thank you, Hammerhead.
Gentlemen, I'll get
right to the point.
For the last four months,
a pest has plagued
our operations.
At first, I could hardly
credit the reports.
Thought the boys
were trying to stiff us.
Had to get a little
rough to make sure
they was sincere.
Establishing
patterns of movement
took all summer,
but last night,
we had confirmation.
The Spider-Man is real.
And you want the Enforcers
to wrangle up
this here spider.
No, Montana.
I want you
to squash it.
[BELL RINGING]
Chapter one by tomorrow,
ladies and gentlemen.
Mr. Parker, Miss Stacy,
a word.
I wonder if either of you
remember a field trip
we took last year
to the laboratory of
Dr. Curtis Connors
at Empire State University.
[EXCLAIMS]
[HEART BEATING]
[HEART BEATS ACCELERATING]
[CHUCKLES]
Trust me.
That's one field trip
I'll never forget.
Me neither. Dr. Connors'
research was thrilling.
I'm glad you
feel that way,
because he's offering
two internships
to promising high schoolers.
I recommended
my two star pupils.
You start
this afternoon.
PETER: Thanks for
letting me kill time
at your place, Harry.
[SIGHS]
I'm not due at the
E.S.U. lab for another hour.
I'm just surprised
you're not hanging
at the school paper.
Aren't you their
star photographer
or something?
Not anymore.
Someone else
can take pictures
of Flash prancing
around the gridiron.
I'll be too busy
raking in the green.
Is this part of
the same reality
where Sally Avril's your
A minor setback.
But at least this
lab job solves
the Parker money problems.
I mean, look around.
All this belongs
to your dad,
and he's a scientist.
NORMAN: Boys,
come out here.
I couldn't
help overhearing.
I'm sorry,
Mr. Osborn. I
Don't you dare
apologize, son.
I never do.
So what's this
about a lab job?
At E.S.U., working
with Curt Connors.
Connors, huh?
Quite an opportunity.
Don't suppose
you were considered
for the honor, Harry?
No, sir.
It's totally not
a big deal, Mr. O,
but thanks.
We'll get out
of your way now.
Osborn!
[GASPS]
Dad.
[NORMAN SCREAMS]
What do we do?
I
Call the cops.
Do it. Go!
Tell the truth, Osborn.
Can your tech-flight do this?
[NORMAN SCREAMS]
Toomes?
Not Toomes now.
I'm what you called me.
I'm the Vulture.
I called you
a buzzard.What?
You can't even
get the name right.
[SCREAMS]
Toomes, stop.
What will any
of this accomplish?
A means to an end,
Osborn.
Something you know
all about.
You will announce
to the world
that Adrian Toomes
is the genius
behind tech-flight.
You will pay me
all that I am owed,
and you will publicly
apologize for
stealing my invention!
I never apologize,
old man.
I may be an old man,
but I'm not a patient one.
[SCREAMS]
[SCREAMING]
SPIDER-MAN:
Whoa, guys, you play
hot potato hardcore.
What is this?
These skies
are mine now!
SPIDER-MAN:
He may be right.
I really just rent.
What are you
babbling about?
Put me down!
Dude, you are the bossiest
damsel in distress
I have ever rescued.
Also the ugliest,
heaviest and the first.
BOTH: Who are you?
Why, I'm your
friendly neighborhood
Spider-Man, of course.
Spider-Man?
I thought you were
a myth.
Man, I need
a new press agent.
He's not helping, Stan.
The perps he nabs almost
always walk and
[GASPS]SPIDER-MAN:
Heads up.
[GRUNTS]
What's going on?Explanations inside!
Now!
Look, beaky, I admire
anyone who dresses up
as their favorite animal,
and better still,
you can fly.
So I gotta ask.
You heard the one
about great power coming
with great responsibility?
[SNARLS]
Whoa! Beaky,
don't fly away mad.
The name
is Vulture!
[STAMMERING]
That's great, Harry.
I'm glad that your dad's safe.
Me? Well, you know, I tried
to follow 'em on foot,
and I ran for blocks,
but
Yeah, I guess
that was pretty useless.
Hey, look, I'm late,
and Gwen's giving me
the look, so bye.
I so was not
giving you the look.
But I am late,
right?
EDDIE: Always, bro.
Eddie!Hey, Gwen.
Bro, what are you
doing here?
Work here.
I'm the Connors'
personal lab assistant.
Not bad for a frosh,
huh?
[CHUCKLES]
Eddie Brock's a freshman.
College freshman,
little man.
But I'm guessing
you're missing me
at Midtown High, huh?
No one to keep
Flash Thompson
off your back?
Stole your shoes
again, huh?
[CLEARS THROAT]
Peter Parker,
Gwen Stacy,
I'd like you to meet
Dr. Martha Connors.
Eddie's told us great things
about you both.
Said you wore
clean underwear.
Lucky I didn't
say socks.
[BEEPS]MARTHA: Curt,
stop hiding in the office.
New interns are here.
I'll be right out.
Peter, Gwen, this is
E.S.U.'s resident genius,
my husband, Curt.
It's an honor to
meet you, Dr. Connors.
You look familiar, son.
Weren't you the boy
that was bit
By the science bug.
You know it!
MARTHA: Now,
we won't overdo it
the first day.
Eddie will show you
around the lab,
but the real work
can start tomorrow.
So, questions welcome.
Here's one.
What does
this gig pay?
Pete, you're
a high school kid
with zero experience.
You're not getting paid.
[PETER SIGHS]
Aunt May needs my help.
I don't know
what I'm gonna do.
Oh, Pete,
don't angst, okay?
It'll come to you.
Well, I'm waiting!
You gotta admit,
the girl knows her stuff.
Oh. Today's been
one-stop shopping
for disappointment.
No money at home,
no cool at school,
I nearly pavement splat
fighting a wacko with wings,
and nowDaily Bugle security
won't even let me
use the elevator.
But May and Ben Parker
didn't raise no quitters.
Any quitters.
You get the idea.
[PEOPLE CHATTERING]
JAMESON:
Get that downstairs now!
Robbie,
where's my layout?
Foswell,
I ordered that rewrite
12 seconds ago.
Lee, I'm not paying you
to sit on your keister!
And you!Me?
Yeah, you! I sent you
for my bagel and schmear
nine minutes ago.
You sent Benny,
Mr. Jameson, and it's
only been three minutes.
Actually, sir,
I've got something
better than a bagel.
Oh, yeah?
What's that?
A proposal.
I think I can get
you pictures,
photos of Spider-Man
in action.
I bet it would sell
a lot of newspapers.
What do you know
about selling papers?
You're a kid!
Worse, you're a teenager.
Miss Brant, call security.
Get this wailing infant
out of my face,
out of my city room,
out of my town!
Hey, what the Bugle
needs is photos of
Spider-Man in action.
Now that would sell
newspapers, huh?
[SIGHS]
Today officially reeks.
Not one thing's gone right,
and now the amazing
Spider-Man is reduced
to sneaking around
for his shoes.
All clear?
VULTURE: Osborn!
Go! Go!
You won't escape me again!
My thought exactly.
Target sighted
at last known location.
Boys, let's
squash us a bug.
[BEEPING]
SPIDER-MAN:
Trick or treat!
[GROANS]
[CHUCKLES]
I mean, you are celebrating
Halloween in September, right?
Or am I not one to talk?
[GRUNTS]
Whoa!
Huh?
Whoa!
Strangest darn gig
Big Man's ever
slid our way.
We're flying with
the freaks now, boys.
I got no idea what
that big bird's about,
but I am mighty glad
he's keeping our bug busy.
[BEEPS]Target locked.
Whoa.
My Spider-sense is
[GRUNTING]
Whoa!
[GASPS]
Ox, Fancy Dan,
you're up.
[GRUNTS]
[GROANS]
Look, pal, if you
needed a breath mint,
you just had to ask.
[GRUNTING]
[GROANS]
Oh. That's not good.
[GROANS]
MONTANA: Ah, ah, ah.
Boys need a workout.
Now, no turning tail.
Seriously,
who are you guys?
I think we lost him.
[POUNDING]
[GROANS]
It's not that I'm running,
but there's this Vulture guy
out there,
so if we could
just postpone
[GRUNTS]
You're strong.
Point taken.
But can you
do this?
[OX GROANS]Didn't think so.
Now I know
you can tear
right through that,
but I wouldn't
recommend it.
Son, you're making
the Enforcers look bad.
I can't have that.
You will apologize!I won't!
Man, this is a sweet ride.
That sunroof come standard?
Why do you defend
that thief Osborn?
Uncool!
Do you know what
these Spider-suits cost?
Never fought anyone
like this group of bozos.
Only one thing
I know for sure.
I can't let Harry
lose his dad the way
I lost Uncle Ben.
[GROANS]Surf's up!
[WHOOPS]
There!
The car park!
Go! Go!
No!
This is all your fault!
Two birds, one stone.
Where'd that varmint
get to now?
Did you really
think you could hide
from me there?
My wing!
I can't steer!
Yeah, but you're
still airborne.
How does that work,
exactly?
Yo, Vultie,
your hump's humming.
You idiot!
You've doomed us both!
[LAUGHS]
You so have not
been paying attention.
Yee-haw!
[SIRENS BLARING]
[GRUNTS]
Well, three out
of four ain't bad,
especially on bizarre
bad guy night.
Now, if I can
just get my shoes.
Oh, perfect end
to a perfect day.
Aunt May,
you're awake.
Sit down, Peter.
We need to talk.
I know you're
a good boy
and growing up to be
a fine young man,
the man
of the house now.
But you're still
my responsibility.
I can't have you
out till midnight.
You're to be home
by 10:00.
That's my bedtime.But Aunt May
If you're late,
you call before 10:00.
If you do call,
it had better be to say
you're on your way home.
That's the law
in this house, Peter.
Do we understand
each other?
[CHUCKLES]
Sure, Aunt May.
That's fair.
Lovely. Now,
how about a slice of
banana cream pie?
Okay, nothing went
as planned today.
Understatement of the year.
But I'm still Spider-Man
and still undefeated.
And I still have
this amazing person
watching out for me.
Tell me there's
something better.
Go ahead. Try.