Twenty Twelve (2011) s01e01 Episode Script
Episode 1
Oh, I think he's going to get the gold! Coe has beaten Cram! What a marvellous finish! And Seb Coe gets the gold medal! There may be trouble ahead But while there's moonlight and music And love and romance Let's face the music and dance Let's face the music and dance.
Sarah, hi.
Yeah, no, that's fine, put him on.
Hi, how are you? Yeah.
No, no, yeah.
Yeah.
Uh-huh? Sure.
So wait, this Hoy guy, the guy with the huge legs, yeah? They're going on about peak flow double greening, OK? I know.
You're not solving the problem either, you're just moving it around.
Absolutely, yes.
Obviously this is No, I'm fine.
No, er, look, this is an area that was flagged from the outset.
Thing is, she's terrific in the water, but out of the water, she's got this nose thing going on.
Absolutely, yep, yep.
No, absolutely.
Yep, yep, yep.
Absolutely.
Monday morning at the Olympic Deliverance Commission in London.
- Morning, Sally.
- Oh, hi, morning! Good weekend? - Not bad, thank you.
- Do anything interesting? - Er, no, not really.
- Right.
I went to the gym on Friday and thought about going out on Saturday night, but I didn't.
Fair enough.
This is the London 2012 engine room.
Whilst others up on deck may be in the public eye, these are the men and women whose responsibility it is to deliver London's Olympic Games on time and on budget.
Before joining the Olympic Deliverance Commission as Head of Deliverance, Ian Fletcher had spells with British Nuclear Fuels before progressing through the National Disasters Executive to his most recent job as director of the Urban Regeneration Agency, Kay Hope just called.
She's currently stuck in traffic.
Yes, obviously.
- And Seb's office called.
- Yes, I spoke to him.
- Also, your wife phoned.
She said - I'm doing it, thanks.
- Do you want the plasters this morning? - Oh, no.
- Are you sure? - Yes, no, let me get, er Would you like a cinnamon Danish? - Oh, now, Sally - I'm going back down anyway.
- What are you trying to do to me? - Well, live dangerously - You know me too well.
- Not a problem.
Right, I know Kay is delayed, but I think we should just make a start.
So if I can just gently remind everyone, phones set to "off", please.
OK, just one preliminary before we Sorry, got to get this, sorry.
Ian is joined for this Monday morning's deliverance review group by Head of Contracts, Nick Jowett, and Head of Infrastructure, Graham Hitchins, as well as by Head of Brand, Siobhan Sharpe, from PR company Perfect Curve.
Matthew Pinsent? I don't even know who that is.
I've got to go.
OK.
OK, bye.
Sorry.
Just one preliminary before we get on to the main business.
Graham, I had a call from upstairs this morning.
All right, yeah.
- You've seen the Analogicus report? - What? Oh, yeah, I've seen it, yeah.
I know there's nothing in there we don't already know, but the fact that it's now in the public domain That's all fine.
Suddenly everyone's talking about traffic light phasing like it's some kind of sliced bread.
OK? It's not it's not a surgical bullet.
- A surgical? Bullet or bread? - Basically, what it is Over the weekend, a report has been published which cites traffic chaos as the most likely impediment to the smooth running of the 2012 Games.
Traffic light phasing, it's not like playing with colours.
It's like doing open-heart bypass surgery, only with the patient actually alive.
Basically, I'd like to be in a position to get a concrete statement about our plans for that area out by Friday.
- OK.
- That sounds reasonable? - Yeah, that's What, this Friday? - Yes, is that going to be OK? - Yes, fine.
- Good, OK.
Which brings us on to Thanks for that, Sally.
- Hellfire! - Good luck with that! Right, OK, the main item this week is obviously Friday.
It's a big week for Ian and his team.
On Friday, they will finally break through the "1,000 days to go" hurdle.
I think what I want to say at this stage is that 1,000 days isn't just a number No, what we're looking at here, guys, is a total game changer.
Yes, it's a chance for us to make a big, confident, public statement about who we are, where we've got to, but also where we're going.
- Yeah, cool.
- So, Siobhan, in terms of practicality OK, thanks for that, Ian.
Um, OK, guys, here's where we ramp up the public interest in 2012 and take it to the next level.
OK? Good? And how we do that is we break open the Google juice, we go viral and we launch 2012, 2.
0.
- OK.
Got a question.
- I'll kinda be coming to questions later.
- Well, I've come to one now.
- OK, cool.
- What are you talking about? - OK, fine.
Effective as of Friday morning, we're going to relaunch the 2012 website.
Thank you.
Yeah, she's a bright girl, Siobhan, she's got a lot of ability and, OK, she's got a big job in some fancy advertising agency.
And that's great, but I'm sorry, if you're going at 90mph all the time, you're going to end up killing someone.
Don't care who you are.
As Head of Contracts for London 2012, Nick Jowett knows a thing or two.
Half the people you work with at a senior level are women.
Over half.
Which is great.
I mean, you can't have enough women, can you? I know a lot of guys are frightened by them, they find them intimidating.
But I'm sorry, I'm from Yorkshire.
I'm not having it.
- What the hell is this? - Bloody big clock.
Sure Unless that guy's tiny.
- No, clock is huge.
- OK, that was like a joke, yeah? The guy standing next to it is Anthony Preston, the guy who created it.
- Anthony who? - So the clock's counting down to 2012.
- Counting backwards? - Sure, totally.
We install it this week.
We make a big noise, we get Seb to wind it up and set it going Friday.
OK.
And we stream the whole thing live on the website.
Fine.
Well, that would be the time to get Seb to say anything we need about how fantastic the traffic's going to be at Games time.
Graham.
What? Yeah, fine, that's fine.
Good, OK.
Fine.
Well, thanks for that, Siobhan.
Guys, this is a slam dunk.
- Hi.
- Kay, hi.
- Sorry, Ian, sorry, everybody.
- Welcome.
- Bloody traffic is diabolical.
- Yes, well, you're here now.
Right, so, have I missed anything important? Let's be honest, you've missed the meeting, love, basically.
- Hi, Anthony.
- Yeah.
It's terrific to meet you.
It's Tuesday, and Siobhan has come to Shoreditch in East London to meet artist Anthony Preston.
I wanted it to be dead simple from the outset, know what I mean? - Sure, yeah, simple's good.
- Didn't want any bollocks.
Sure, that's a great idea.
His specially commissioned 1,000 Day 2012 Clock is something of a departure for an artist who's probably been best known up to now for gaining a reputation.
So, I'm noticing you've got a bit of a green vibe going on here.
Yeah, so? - I'm thinking how did you get to that? - It's green because it's green.
- OK, OK, that's cool.
- Cool? Sure.
Who's trying to be cool? Because I'm fucking not, I'll tell you that now.
- That's totally cool.
- It's a wind-up clock, for Christ's sake.
- Doesn't use any energy.
- Oh, OK, so it's green.
- Congratulations.
- Oh, that's terrific.
So your idea with this is that ordinary people will just wind it up and keep it going? - If you say so.
- OK, I love this.
OK, so, as of now, it's set for 5 o'clock, July 27th, 2012.
Yeah, but that will be digital.
It's not finished yet.
Oh, right.
So that's like the start of the opening ceremony for the Games.
OK, that's terrific.
Um, OK.
So, OK.
And once it's installed, it will go backwards 1,000 days.
- No, wait, it will go forwards.
- No, it won't go forwards.
No, sure, absolutely, absolutely.
OK.
So, OK.
So, um, when it starts, it'll It's just basically counting down.
- It's not fucking complicated.
- No, absolutely, absolutely, absolutely.
So, the thing is, OK, here's the thing, OK, so It's basically counting backwards? It'll count back to the beginning of time if people go on winding it up.
Sure.
OK.
- OK? - Absolutely.
'kin 'ell! Sure.
It's totally sensational.
Well, I know I didn't, but, I mean, really Wait a minute! I thought you said there was a shower.
Yeah, well, a shower over the bath is still a shower.
Ah, fuck! 8.
30 on Wednesday morning, and Ian is already under pressure.
The thing is, I'm not going to have a lot of time today to look at hotels.
It's recently become increasingly clear to him that he's going to have a weekend away with his wife in Barcelona.
How much time are you going to be spending in the bathroom? It is difficult with a job like this.
It is all-consuming, I realise that.
And sometimes there isn't as much time as there perhaps should be for, you know, other areas of your life.
So this idea of a weekend away, it does make a lot of sense, and, in the end, there's no way of getting round that.
Are you looking forward to it? Well, it's subsequently been rebranded as a romantic mini-break.
- Which is a lot more complicated.
- Yes.
- Morning, Sally.
- Oh, hi, morning.
- Hi, how are you? - Good, not bad, thank you.
- So, Boris' office called.
- Oh, yes? What did they want? He's wondering why he's not been involved in the 1,000 Day Day thing on Friday.
Oh, God, no.
I've told them we've already go Seb doing it.
But that seemed to make it worse.
I thought we might have escaped.
Seb'll go nuts.
- And also your wife rang.
- Yes, I know, thanks.
Sure.
- How's it going? - So far, so good.
Graham Hitchins is monitoring a trial of some new, upgraded traffic light phasing software, designed to improve traffic flows across London in time for 2012.
It's like flying an aeroplane.
You get this right, no-one will notice.
You get it wrong - Everyone notices.
- Yeah, first they notice, then they die.
Right, so how do we make sure that, you know, they don't die? Well, first you test it, OK? Then you test it again, and when you've done that, you test it again.
Right.
And then once you've finished all of that, you test it again.
- So, basically, a lot of testing, then? - Yeah, I mean, what you're doing, OK, you'll gradually design failure out of the system.
So, after you've done all the testing, the aircraft, simply, it can't crash? Yeah, I mean, if it does crash after all of that, to be honest, you really are seriously fucked.
So we're still good for having something positive to give Seb on Friday? - Yeah, no worries.
This Friday? - Yes.
Yeah, that's fine.
Hi No, no, that's fine.
Put him through.
Hello! Good morning, how are you? As on most mornings, Ian has had a call from Boris Johnson's office.
And per ardua ad astra, yes.
Exactly, yes, yes.
No, um, absolutely.
I got the message earlier.
That's, er, terrific news.
He's called to point out that he's free to take part in Friday's 1,000 Day Day day.
That'll be fantastic for us.
Yes, yes, no, brilliant.
Absolutely.
No, no, absolutely.
It's actually a very flexible space, easily convertible for use into a sort of multi-ethnic indoor skateboarding experience, for instance.
Yeah.
Meanwhile, Head of Sustainability, Kay Hope, has come to St.
Mary's Youth Group in Stoke Newington to meet group leader Shaquille Johnson.
We've already got a skateboarding park, like, in the park.
- Right.
- If you was talking about a pitch, like a five-a-side pitch, AstroTurf, know what I'm saying, - then maybe we could do something.
- There will be the hockey arena.
But that's going to be part of Urban Duck World after the Games.
God, you're killing me.
It's part of her ongoing mission to find a sustainable use for the Tae Kwon Do Arena, post-2012.
It'll take us a couple of hours to get there, and by then, - we won't have time for any other shit.
- Right.
So, basically, it's thank you, and I kinda like you, - but this is some mad shit.
- Right.
You know what I'm saying? - Of course, but you will think about it? - I've just done that.
- That's what I've just done? - Yes.
Bruce Forsyth, Archbishop Desmond Tutu, Stephen Hawking, Joanna Lumley, Stephen Fry-obviously - either Prince Harry or Prince William or Trinny or Susannah, we're still looking at the ideal combination Back at the Olympic Deliverance Commission, Head of Brand, Siobhan Sharpe, has arrived with a list of potential Olympic torch bearers which her team of young creatives at Perfect Curve have thrown up.
Sir Trevor McDonald, obviously, Lord Alan Sugar, if he'd do it, Gok Wan.
Wait, wait, hang on a minute.
Bruce Forsyth? - We love Bruce.
- Well, yes, but - Keep dancin'! - You're not serious? We saying these are our national heroes? - You're getting the go-to list.
- Gok Wan? With Sebastian Coe keen to include an announcement about torch bearers as part of 1,000 Day Day, the pressure is on.
But deciding on a list of names that adequately reflects what Britain is today is no easy task.
Someone with a bit more gravitas.
Like Michael Palin, or - Yeah, he's actually dead.
- No, he's not.
Michael Palin is not dead.
You're telling me he's not.
He's from Sheffield.
- Sorry.
- Hi, Kay, come on in.
Had to go to Stoke Newington.
- Yes, of course.
- Traffic's absolutely Well, luckily, Graham's on top of all that, aren't you, Graham? Yeah, basically, the worse it gets, the more we're learning about why that is.
As the meeting continues, Ian is keen to steer the level of conversation upwards.
- What about J.
K.
Rowling? - OK.
Well, that's a bit more We've kind of got Joanna Lumley, so we're sort of covered there.
OK, right.
- Carol Ann Duffy.
- Ah, now, right.
- Yeah, we did talk about Duffy.
- She's cool.
- Kay's talking about Carol Ann Duffy.
- She'd look great with a torch.
- Carol as well? - No.
Carol's her mum, right? - Carol Ann Duffy is the Poet Laureate.
- Thank you, Ian.
Yeah, OK, anyway.
Who's that guy with the hair and glasses? - This is ridiculous.
- Um, er, it'll come to me in a minute.
Look, all we're after here are some national figures who have earned respect because of who they are as people.
Basically people who make you feel proud to be British.
That's all.
So come on, surely.
Got it! Gok Wan.
Thank you very much.
Gok Wan.
What? I mean, do we actually need to book anything anyway? With one meeting over, there are already other issues waiting to be dealt with.
I thought we might drop our bags at the hotel, just wander out, have a drink, find a little tapas bar somewhere and see how we No, OK, fine.
Yeah, OK.
Bye.
Right, good.
Good grief, Sally, that's enormous! - Do you like avocado? - Yes, I do, I love avocado.
It's nice, isn't it? - I ought to make my own sandwich.
- It's not a problem.
It'll be terrific for circus skills in the whole of the Lea Valley.
Of course, yes, I understand that.
Will you think about it, though? OK, well, I'll call you again tomorrow, then.
I'll call you anyway.
OK.
Bye.
Is that the Tae Kwon Do Arena? Yes, that was actually the guy who runs Rudolfo's Travelling Circus.
- I don't know whether you know them.
- Rudolfo's, Rudolfo's Anyway, I've fixed up a meeting to talk about a possible permanent home.
A permanent home for a travelling circus? I think he was intrigued.
He wasn't giving anything away.
No, I bet he wasn't.
It's an uphill battle, but we'll get there in the end.
We're pretty damn close with the National Indoor Donkey Sanctuary people.
It's a shame they got cold feet.
Presumably you tried the Tae Kwon Do people? Er, pardon? I'm pretty sure there's a British Tae Kwon Do Association.
- Right.
- So, in terms of use for the Tae Kwon Do Arena, post Games, I would think a Tae Kwon Do Arena would tick quite a lot of boxes.
Hmm.
Yes.
Actually, Sally, I really think you should stop there.
OK, sure.
Not a problem.
From a sustainability point of view, the Olympics isn't really about sport at all.
This whole thing starts when the sport ends.
Presumably, sustainability is very closely connected to legacy? Beg your pardon? It is not.
They are not the same.
They are not.
- No, but in general - Sustainability is about using the Games as a catalyst for change.
It's about improving the quality of life in the East End of London and encouraging new ways of life across the whole of the UK that take into account our debt not just to the past but also to the future.
- Right.
- Whereas legacy is totally different.
Yes.
Yes, I see.
Yeah, yeah.
- I think I did say - Absolutely.
That would be a disaster.
What we thought was, if we give Boris some scissors to play with and the tape to cut, that should keep him happy.
Meanwhile, Ian has decided to go across town to pay a visit to PR company Perfect Curve.
- Yes.
No, absolutely.
- I don't know who he is.
So, this is Barney.
- Hey.
- Hi.
With 1,000 Day Day now only a day away, he's keen to see how preparations for the 2012 website relaunch are going.
- How's it going, Barn? - It's pretty cool.
There's a couple of things taking longer than we'd like, but that's normal.
OK, so this is, like, Ian.
He's kinda like, he's the Head of Deliverance, so I am Head of Deliverance.
Barney Lumsden is head of Siobhan Sharpe's online team.
When it's finished, we are going to have, like, text here, bloggy stuff here, you've got your webcam here, RSS, Twitter feeds here, videos here - Say about the clock.
- Yeah, yeah, that's cool.
Uh, we've got, like, a live webcam situation going on here.
Yeah, we've been looking at ways of trying to create a sense of urgency at the center of the relaunch, - kind of like a ticking clock.
- Yes.
And it was Barney who came up with the idea of literally, like, the clock.
- Right.
- Hey.
- So from Friday onwards - Tomorrow? From Friday, anyone who visits the 2012 website will see a live webcam image of the clock counting backwards towards the opening ceremony.
To the start of the opening ceremony.
And what we're trying to say is, it's kind of like a dynamic thing.
Um, it's constantly in motion, but also what we're saying is launch sequence has commenced.
OK, what's the matter? What's with the face? - Um, OK, right, the clock.
- OK, yeah, the clock is sensational.
I'm sure it is.
But how does it work, exactly? OK, OK.
Um, OK, so, the thing with the clock is, OK, um, so here's the thing with the clock.
Um the great thing about the clock is that it's counting backwards.
Backwards in time or backwards in numbers? - Sure.
Either.
I mean both.
- Right.
Absolutely.
It's sensational.
- It's pretty cool.
- Can we have a word? - Totally, yeah.
- By the way, whilst I'm here - Yeah, sure.
- It's probably just me, but this "Olyp" "Olypmic"? Is that some kind of? Yeah, no, that's just like, you know, that's just like spelling.
Oh, right.
Yeah, we can change that whenever you want.
- Yeah, we can change that.
- Good.
- You want me to actually - Well, why not? There.
That better? - Well, I mean, it's different.
- It's cool.
Give us two minutes.
- Yeah, sure.
- Bye.
Hang loose.
First of all, OK, what is it with that guy? - What is it with him? - Is he a close friend of yours or? - Barney's totally plugged in.
- He's an idiot.
Ian is concerned that some of Siobhan's preparations for tomorrow - may not be fully there.
- Our online presence - is a key part of who we are.
- It's virtually our virtual front door.
- Yes, and it's virtually off its hinges.
- OK, here's the thing, OK? The thing is, here, OK? OK, here's the thing.
So, the thing is Siobhan, forgive me if I haven't time for the usual pleasantries.
Sure, that's cool.
But get that guy some new glasses, some new hair if need be - Sure.
- Get a new guy, I don't care, whatever, but this needs to be completely sorted by the morning, OK? - That's cool, I'm totally good with that.
- Also, with the clock, I'm going to need a clear, unambiguous explanation of exactly how it works.
- Sure.
- Something even Boris can grasp.
- OK.
- Because I have to say, right now, - I'm really struggling to understand it.
- Absolutely cool.
Kentish Town Road.
Hornsey Rise Meanwhile, Graham Hitchins is burning the midnight oil.
The new traffic light phasing trial has been live for 48 hours and is reaching a crucial stage.
H m, that's quite interesting.
Basically, that's resulted in traffic flows being significantly slower.
- Slower? - Yeah, I know, it's mad.
But I've been thinking about it and I think it's because we've been trialling it in too small an area.
I mean, you're talking about a system that's capable of making six billion decisions a second.
God, that's very decisive.
Yes, so now what we're going to do is trial it in a much bigger area.
- Right.
- OK? So, like, the whole north and north-east London.
- Right.
Is that wise? - Yeah, it is.
Inevitably, it's Friday.
Where is he at this present time? He's still there? No way! No way! But with people gathering outside London's Tate Modern for the official commissioning of Andrew Preston's 1,000 Day Clock and the start of the final countdown to London 2012, so far, there's no sign of either Sebastian Coe or Boris Johnson.
He's been stuck there for, like, an hour.
This is just, like, somebody somewhere just hit "pause", you know? OK, then, I'll meet you at the airport.
I'll meet you there.
No, I won't - there's one every 15 minutes.
Meanwhile, Ian's own final countdown to Barcelona is also now under way.
Laura, the flight's not until 6.
55.
I won't, Laura.
On this one occasion, I won't be useless, OK? So the latest, effective as of now, is that Seb is still - in the Rotherhithe Tunnel.
- Great Also the Central line is down because of unforeseen improvement works.
- What about Boris? - Sure.
- Isn't he on his bike? - OK, so Boris is under police protection.
- Right, do you want to explain that? - Sure, totally.
Um, Boris was threatened by a bunch of cabbies.
Um, because they were angry about the traffic chaos.
- Brilliant, brilliant - OK, so, here's the thing.
Um, I think what we may be looking at here is delaying No, we can't delay it, Siobhan.
The whole point is - Could you take those off? - Sure.
It has to be counting down precisely to the start of the opening ceremony.
- That's the whole point of today.
- OK, OK, so what we do, here's the thing.
- OK, here's where we're at with that.
- OK, now you're babbling.
- Sure.
- So, the clock With both his star speakers now apparently involved in Graham Hitchins' new traffic light phasing trial, Ian knows he's running out of time.
Even if it's not clear which way time is going.
So, um, here's the thing, here's where we're at with this.
The clock is going to be counting down 1,000 days backwards to 2012.
- Right.
Or backwards from 2012? - Sure, exactly.
- Well, there's a difference, Siobhan.
- OK, if you want to be - This is really quite a key - Whether it's from or to No, it's not, Siobhan! - I mean, get over it! - Right.
I'll ask him.
- OK.
Anthony, he's a brilliant guy.
- I don't care.
Hey, Anthony! This is Ian Fletcher, Head of Deliverance for 2012.
- OK, so? - Lan, this is Anthony Preston.
Ian is about to be reminded that the artist isn't always the best person to ask to explain his own creation in actual words.
The clock is sensational.
- I need to double-check - It's counting backwards, love.
So tomorrow, for instance, unless I've got this wrong, - it'll be reading 26th July, 2012? - Sure.
Totally.
- Which is the day before the Olympics? - Absolutely, it's cool.
- What is it with you guys? - So in 1,000 days' time - It's not fucking complicated! - Good.
So in 1,000 days' time - Oh, fuckin' hell.
- OK, so in 1,000 days, it'll be - He's doing my fucking head in.
- Everything's totally cool.
So, basically, just to be clear about this, am I right in thinking that at the start of the Olympics in 2012, this clock will be reading, well, it'll be now, it'll be today? Totally, yeah, totally.
Sure, yeah, that's cool.
Absolutely cool.
Oh, right, he's gone.
Great We're very excited to be working with Anthony Preston Having at last succeeded in clarifying the clock's unique design concept, Ian is now faced with explaining it to the waiting press.
- Why is it counting the wrong way, then? - It isn't counting the wrong way.
Surely it should count towards the Games, not backwards away from them.
No.
If you want my personal take, I think the clock is a powerful and, at the same time, playful comment on time itself.
After all, every year we put the clocks forward, but time goes back.
For now, as we stand here today, the clock points us towards our destination.
When we arrive, it will be reminding us of this day and of the journey we've all taken.
But with still no sign of either Sebastian Coe or Boris Johnson, Ian has reached the point where he has to make a decision.
I don't know who it was who said it's when all the wheels come off at once, you find out who you really are.
It's all very well as an expression, but the problem is, when that happens, what you nearly always find out is that you're the driver.
Still, handbrake off.
Having dealt with one problem, he is now faced with an even bigger one OK, ladies and gentlemen, I think we'll how to formally introduce the public commissioning of the 1,000 Day Clock when neither of the people due to perform that task have managed to make it to the ceremony.
As you know, London 2012 is very much the people's Games, which is why I'm pleased to be able to announce formally today that Peter Andre has agreed to be our principal torch bearer for London 2012.
Whoo! Yay! In that spirit, I think it would only be appropriate, and very much in line with the essence of London 2012, to invite a member of the public to perform the honour of winding up and starting Anthony Preston's magnificent 1,000 Day Clock.
So, Siobhan, if you'd like to perhaps get that process under way? Finding a member of the public to wind up Um, excuse me, my name's Siobhan Sharpe.
Would you come? No? OK.
Hey there, hello! My name's Siobhan Sharpe Professionally, Ian has succeeded in turning a potential disaster into a triumph.
This is Sadie, who's 65, from Surrey.
She's just a member of the public, an ordinary, normal OK, just wind it round.
That's it.
- This is Andrew Preston, our artist.
- Anthony.
- Sadie.
- Great, if you'd like to turn round Could we come to the front of the clock? But it's becoming clear to him that if he's going to be on the flight to Barcelona, he needs to leave for Liverpool Street Station before it's too late to get there.
Just come in the middle, please, thanks.
OK.
OK? Laura, I'm doing my best.
We're moving again now.
Honestly, we're flying along.
I'll be with you in no time.
But there are some things even the Head of Deliverance for London 2012 can't control.
And the science of traffic light phasing turns out to be one of them.
What happens if she gets on the plane - and you don't make it? - Yes, yes.
- Well, let's not count our chickens.
- No.
No, so it's all good.
There may be trouble ahead But while there's moonlight and music and love and romance My name's Siobhan Sharpe.
I'm Head of Brand for London 2012 and I'll be your tour guide today.
Can I just say, I have no idea where this guy's going.
- Let's just assume that he does know.
- Fine.
I'm not interested in how this happened - I'm interested in getting to the Olympic Park by 11.
45 at the latest.
- If you get away a bit earlier.
- When you say early Whoa, whoa! OK.
What we don't want to do is end up going through the Blackwall Tunnel, OK? - So where are we up to? - Right.
Yeah.
No, no! Not the M11! We'll end up at bloody Stansted Airport.
Just keep him there for ten more minutes.
Um, if you So, we'll basically Actually, what roundabout is this? There may be teardrops to shed So while there's moonlight and music And love and romance Let's face the music and dance Let's face the music And dance!
Sarah, hi.
Yeah, no, that's fine, put him on.
Hi, how are you? Yeah.
No, no, yeah.
Yeah.
Uh-huh? Sure.
So wait, this Hoy guy, the guy with the huge legs, yeah? They're going on about peak flow double greening, OK? I know.
You're not solving the problem either, you're just moving it around.
Absolutely, yes.
Obviously this is No, I'm fine.
No, er, look, this is an area that was flagged from the outset.
Thing is, she's terrific in the water, but out of the water, she's got this nose thing going on.
Absolutely, yep, yep.
No, absolutely.
Yep, yep, yep.
Absolutely.
Monday morning at the Olympic Deliverance Commission in London.
- Morning, Sally.
- Oh, hi, morning! Good weekend? - Not bad, thank you.
- Do anything interesting? - Er, no, not really.
- Right.
I went to the gym on Friday and thought about going out on Saturday night, but I didn't.
Fair enough.
This is the London 2012 engine room.
Whilst others up on deck may be in the public eye, these are the men and women whose responsibility it is to deliver London's Olympic Games on time and on budget.
Before joining the Olympic Deliverance Commission as Head of Deliverance, Ian Fletcher had spells with British Nuclear Fuels before progressing through the National Disasters Executive to his most recent job as director of the Urban Regeneration Agency, Kay Hope just called.
She's currently stuck in traffic.
Yes, obviously.
- And Seb's office called.
- Yes, I spoke to him.
- Also, your wife phoned.
She said - I'm doing it, thanks.
- Do you want the plasters this morning? - Oh, no.
- Are you sure? - Yes, no, let me get, er Would you like a cinnamon Danish? - Oh, now, Sally - I'm going back down anyway.
- What are you trying to do to me? - Well, live dangerously - You know me too well.
- Not a problem.
Right, I know Kay is delayed, but I think we should just make a start.
So if I can just gently remind everyone, phones set to "off", please.
OK, just one preliminary before we Sorry, got to get this, sorry.
Ian is joined for this Monday morning's deliverance review group by Head of Contracts, Nick Jowett, and Head of Infrastructure, Graham Hitchins, as well as by Head of Brand, Siobhan Sharpe, from PR company Perfect Curve.
Matthew Pinsent? I don't even know who that is.
I've got to go.
OK.
OK, bye.
Sorry.
Just one preliminary before we get on to the main business.
Graham, I had a call from upstairs this morning.
All right, yeah.
- You've seen the Analogicus report? - What? Oh, yeah, I've seen it, yeah.
I know there's nothing in there we don't already know, but the fact that it's now in the public domain That's all fine.
Suddenly everyone's talking about traffic light phasing like it's some kind of sliced bread.
OK? It's not it's not a surgical bullet.
- A surgical? Bullet or bread? - Basically, what it is Over the weekend, a report has been published which cites traffic chaos as the most likely impediment to the smooth running of the 2012 Games.
Traffic light phasing, it's not like playing with colours.
It's like doing open-heart bypass surgery, only with the patient actually alive.
Basically, I'd like to be in a position to get a concrete statement about our plans for that area out by Friday.
- OK.
- That sounds reasonable? - Yeah, that's What, this Friday? - Yes, is that going to be OK? - Yes, fine.
- Good, OK.
Which brings us on to Thanks for that, Sally.
- Hellfire! - Good luck with that! Right, OK, the main item this week is obviously Friday.
It's a big week for Ian and his team.
On Friday, they will finally break through the "1,000 days to go" hurdle.
I think what I want to say at this stage is that 1,000 days isn't just a number No, what we're looking at here, guys, is a total game changer.
Yes, it's a chance for us to make a big, confident, public statement about who we are, where we've got to, but also where we're going.
- Yeah, cool.
- So, Siobhan, in terms of practicality OK, thanks for that, Ian.
Um, OK, guys, here's where we ramp up the public interest in 2012 and take it to the next level.
OK? Good? And how we do that is we break open the Google juice, we go viral and we launch 2012, 2.
0.
- OK.
Got a question.
- I'll kinda be coming to questions later.
- Well, I've come to one now.
- OK, cool.
- What are you talking about? - OK, fine.
Effective as of Friday morning, we're going to relaunch the 2012 website.
Thank you.
Yeah, she's a bright girl, Siobhan, she's got a lot of ability and, OK, she's got a big job in some fancy advertising agency.
And that's great, but I'm sorry, if you're going at 90mph all the time, you're going to end up killing someone.
Don't care who you are.
As Head of Contracts for London 2012, Nick Jowett knows a thing or two.
Half the people you work with at a senior level are women.
Over half.
Which is great.
I mean, you can't have enough women, can you? I know a lot of guys are frightened by them, they find them intimidating.
But I'm sorry, I'm from Yorkshire.
I'm not having it.
- What the hell is this? - Bloody big clock.
Sure Unless that guy's tiny.
- No, clock is huge.
- OK, that was like a joke, yeah? The guy standing next to it is Anthony Preston, the guy who created it.
- Anthony who? - So the clock's counting down to 2012.
- Counting backwards? - Sure, totally.
We install it this week.
We make a big noise, we get Seb to wind it up and set it going Friday.
OK.
And we stream the whole thing live on the website.
Fine.
Well, that would be the time to get Seb to say anything we need about how fantastic the traffic's going to be at Games time.
Graham.
What? Yeah, fine, that's fine.
Good, OK.
Fine.
Well, thanks for that, Siobhan.
Guys, this is a slam dunk.
- Hi.
- Kay, hi.
- Sorry, Ian, sorry, everybody.
- Welcome.
- Bloody traffic is diabolical.
- Yes, well, you're here now.
Right, so, have I missed anything important? Let's be honest, you've missed the meeting, love, basically.
- Hi, Anthony.
- Yeah.
It's terrific to meet you.
It's Tuesday, and Siobhan has come to Shoreditch in East London to meet artist Anthony Preston.
I wanted it to be dead simple from the outset, know what I mean? - Sure, yeah, simple's good.
- Didn't want any bollocks.
Sure, that's a great idea.
His specially commissioned 1,000 Day 2012 Clock is something of a departure for an artist who's probably been best known up to now for gaining a reputation.
So, I'm noticing you've got a bit of a green vibe going on here.
Yeah, so? - I'm thinking how did you get to that? - It's green because it's green.
- OK, OK, that's cool.
- Cool? Sure.
Who's trying to be cool? Because I'm fucking not, I'll tell you that now.
- That's totally cool.
- It's a wind-up clock, for Christ's sake.
- Doesn't use any energy.
- Oh, OK, so it's green.
- Congratulations.
- Oh, that's terrific.
So your idea with this is that ordinary people will just wind it up and keep it going? - If you say so.
- OK, I love this.
OK, so, as of now, it's set for 5 o'clock, July 27th, 2012.
Yeah, but that will be digital.
It's not finished yet.
Oh, right.
So that's like the start of the opening ceremony for the Games.
OK, that's terrific.
Um, OK.
So, OK.
And once it's installed, it will go backwards 1,000 days.
- No, wait, it will go forwards.
- No, it won't go forwards.
No, sure, absolutely, absolutely.
OK.
So, OK.
So, um, when it starts, it'll It's just basically counting down.
- It's not fucking complicated.
- No, absolutely, absolutely, absolutely.
So, the thing is, OK, here's the thing, OK, so It's basically counting backwards? It'll count back to the beginning of time if people go on winding it up.
Sure.
OK.
- OK? - Absolutely.
'kin 'ell! Sure.
It's totally sensational.
Well, I know I didn't, but, I mean, really Wait a minute! I thought you said there was a shower.
Yeah, well, a shower over the bath is still a shower.
Ah, fuck! 8.
30 on Wednesday morning, and Ian is already under pressure.
The thing is, I'm not going to have a lot of time today to look at hotels.
It's recently become increasingly clear to him that he's going to have a weekend away with his wife in Barcelona.
How much time are you going to be spending in the bathroom? It is difficult with a job like this.
It is all-consuming, I realise that.
And sometimes there isn't as much time as there perhaps should be for, you know, other areas of your life.
So this idea of a weekend away, it does make a lot of sense, and, in the end, there's no way of getting round that.
Are you looking forward to it? Well, it's subsequently been rebranded as a romantic mini-break.
- Which is a lot more complicated.
- Yes.
- Morning, Sally.
- Oh, hi, morning.
- Hi, how are you? - Good, not bad, thank you.
- So, Boris' office called.
- Oh, yes? What did they want? He's wondering why he's not been involved in the 1,000 Day Day thing on Friday.
Oh, God, no.
I've told them we've already go Seb doing it.
But that seemed to make it worse.
I thought we might have escaped.
Seb'll go nuts.
- And also your wife rang.
- Yes, I know, thanks.
Sure.
- How's it going? - So far, so good.
Graham Hitchins is monitoring a trial of some new, upgraded traffic light phasing software, designed to improve traffic flows across London in time for 2012.
It's like flying an aeroplane.
You get this right, no-one will notice.
You get it wrong - Everyone notices.
- Yeah, first they notice, then they die.
Right, so how do we make sure that, you know, they don't die? Well, first you test it, OK? Then you test it again, and when you've done that, you test it again.
Right.
And then once you've finished all of that, you test it again.
- So, basically, a lot of testing, then? - Yeah, I mean, what you're doing, OK, you'll gradually design failure out of the system.
So, after you've done all the testing, the aircraft, simply, it can't crash? Yeah, I mean, if it does crash after all of that, to be honest, you really are seriously fucked.
So we're still good for having something positive to give Seb on Friday? - Yeah, no worries.
This Friday? - Yes.
Yeah, that's fine.
Hi No, no, that's fine.
Put him through.
Hello! Good morning, how are you? As on most mornings, Ian has had a call from Boris Johnson's office.
And per ardua ad astra, yes.
Exactly, yes, yes.
No, um, absolutely.
I got the message earlier.
That's, er, terrific news.
He's called to point out that he's free to take part in Friday's 1,000 Day Day day.
That'll be fantastic for us.
Yes, yes, no, brilliant.
Absolutely.
No, no, absolutely.
It's actually a very flexible space, easily convertible for use into a sort of multi-ethnic indoor skateboarding experience, for instance.
Yeah.
Meanwhile, Head of Sustainability, Kay Hope, has come to St.
Mary's Youth Group in Stoke Newington to meet group leader Shaquille Johnson.
We've already got a skateboarding park, like, in the park.
- Right.
- If you was talking about a pitch, like a five-a-side pitch, AstroTurf, know what I'm saying, - then maybe we could do something.
- There will be the hockey arena.
But that's going to be part of Urban Duck World after the Games.
God, you're killing me.
It's part of her ongoing mission to find a sustainable use for the Tae Kwon Do Arena, post-2012.
It'll take us a couple of hours to get there, and by then, - we won't have time for any other shit.
- Right.
So, basically, it's thank you, and I kinda like you, - but this is some mad shit.
- Right.
You know what I'm saying? - Of course, but you will think about it? - I've just done that.
- That's what I've just done? - Yes.
Bruce Forsyth, Archbishop Desmond Tutu, Stephen Hawking, Joanna Lumley, Stephen Fry-obviously - either Prince Harry or Prince William or Trinny or Susannah, we're still looking at the ideal combination Back at the Olympic Deliverance Commission, Head of Brand, Siobhan Sharpe, has arrived with a list of potential Olympic torch bearers which her team of young creatives at Perfect Curve have thrown up.
Sir Trevor McDonald, obviously, Lord Alan Sugar, if he'd do it, Gok Wan.
Wait, wait, hang on a minute.
Bruce Forsyth? - We love Bruce.
- Well, yes, but - Keep dancin'! - You're not serious? We saying these are our national heroes? - You're getting the go-to list.
- Gok Wan? With Sebastian Coe keen to include an announcement about torch bearers as part of 1,000 Day Day, the pressure is on.
But deciding on a list of names that adequately reflects what Britain is today is no easy task.
Someone with a bit more gravitas.
Like Michael Palin, or - Yeah, he's actually dead.
- No, he's not.
Michael Palin is not dead.
You're telling me he's not.
He's from Sheffield.
- Sorry.
- Hi, Kay, come on in.
Had to go to Stoke Newington.
- Yes, of course.
- Traffic's absolutely Well, luckily, Graham's on top of all that, aren't you, Graham? Yeah, basically, the worse it gets, the more we're learning about why that is.
As the meeting continues, Ian is keen to steer the level of conversation upwards.
- What about J.
K.
Rowling? - OK.
Well, that's a bit more We've kind of got Joanna Lumley, so we're sort of covered there.
OK, right.
- Carol Ann Duffy.
- Ah, now, right.
- Yeah, we did talk about Duffy.
- She's cool.
- Kay's talking about Carol Ann Duffy.
- She'd look great with a torch.
- Carol as well? - No.
Carol's her mum, right? - Carol Ann Duffy is the Poet Laureate.
- Thank you, Ian.
Yeah, OK, anyway.
Who's that guy with the hair and glasses? - This is ridiculous.
- Um, er, it'll come to me in a minute.
Look, all we're after here are some national figures who have earned respect because of who they are as people.
Basically people who make you feel proud to be British.
That's all.
So come on, surely.
Got it! Gok Wan.
Thank you very much.
Gok Wan.
What? I mean, do we actually need to book anything anyway? With one meeting over, there are already other issues waiting to be dealt with.
I thought we might drop our bags at the hotel, just wander out, have a drink, find a little tapas bar somewhere and see how we No, OK, fine.
Yeah, OK.
Bye.
Right, good.
Good grief, Sally, that's enormous! - Do you like avocado? - Yes, I do, I love avocado.
It's nice, isn't it? - I ought to make my own sandwich.
- It's not a problem.
It'll be terrific for circus skills in the whole of the Lea Valley.
Of course, yes, I understand that.
Will you think about it, though? OK, well, I'll call you again tomorrow, then.
I'll call you anyway.
OK.
Bye.
Is that the Tae Kwon Do Arena? Yes, that was actually the guy who runs Rudolfo's Travelling Circus.
- I don't know whether you know them.
- Rudolfo's, Rudolfo's Anyway, I've fixed up a meeting to talk about a possible permanent home.
A permanent home for a travelling circus? I think he was intrigued.
He wasn't giving anything away.
No, I bet he wasn't.
It's an uphill battle, but we'll get there in the end.
We're pretty damn close with the National Indoor Donkey Sanctuary people.
It's a shame they got cold feet.
Presumably you tried the Tae Kwon Do people? Er, pardon? I'm pretty sure there's a British Tae Kwon Do Association.
- Right.
- So, in terms of use for the Tae Kwon Do Arena, post Games, I would think a Tae Kwon Do Arena would tick quite a lot of boxes.
Hmm.
Yes.
Actually, Sally, I really think you should stop there.
OK, sure.
Not a problem.
From a sustainability point of view, the Olympics isn't really about sport at all.
This whole thing starts when the sport ends.
Presumably, sustainability is very closely connected to legacy? Beg your pardon? It is not.
They are not the same.
They are not.
- No, but in general - Sustainability is about using the Games as a catalyst for change.
It's about improving the quality of life in the East End of London and encouraging new ways of life across the whole of the UK that take into account our debt not just to the past but also to the future.
- Right.
- Whereas legacy is totally different.
Yes.
Yes, I see.
Yeah, yeah.
- I think I did say - Absolutely.
That would be a disaster.
What we thought was, if we give Boris some scissors to play with and the tape to cut, that should keep him happy.
Meanwhile, Ian has decided to go across town to pay a visit to PR company Perfect Curve.
- Yes.
No, absolutely.
- I don't know who he is.
So, this is Barney.
- Hey.
- Hi.
With 1,000 Day Day now only a day away, he's keen to see how preparations for the 2012 website relaunch are going.
- How's it going, Barn? - It's pretty cool.
There's a couple of things taking longer than we'd like, but that's normal.
OK, so this is, like, Ian.
He's kinda like, he's the Head of Deliverance, so I am Head of Deliverance.
Barney Lumsden is head of Siobhan Sharpe's online team.
When it's finished, we are going to have, like, text here, bloggy stuff here, you've got your webcam here, RSS, Twitter feeds here, videos here - Say about the clock.
- Yeah, yeah, that's cool.
Uh, we've got, like, a live webcam situation going on here.
Yeah, we've been looking at ways of trying to create a sense of urgency at the center of the relaunch, - kind of like a ticking clock.
- Yes.
And it was Barney who came up with the idea of literally, like, the clock.
- Right.
- Hey.
- So from Friday onwards - Tomorrow? From Friday, anyone who visits the 2012 website will see a live webcam image of the clock counting backwards towards the opening ceremony.
To the start of the opening ceremony.
And what we're trying to say is, it's kind of like a dynamic thing.
Um, it's constantly in motion, but also what we're saying is launch sequence has commenced.
OK, what's the matter? What's with the face? - Um, OK, right, the clock.
- OK, yeah, the clock is sensational.
I'm sure it is.
But how does it work, exactly? OK, OK.
Um, OK, so, the thing with the clock is, OK, um, so here's the thing with the clock.
Um the great thing about the clock is that it's counting backwards.
Backwards in time or backwards in numbers? - Sure.
Either.
I mean both.
- Right.
Absolutely.
It's sensational.
- It's pretty cool.
- Can we have a word? - Totally, yeah.
- By the way, whilst I'm here - Yeah, sure.
- It's probably just me, but this "Olyp" "Olypmic"? Is that some kind of? Yeah, no, that's just like, you know, that's just like spelling.
Oh, right.
Yeah, we can change that whenever you want.
- Yeah, we can change that.
- Good.
- You want me to actually - Well, why not? There.
That better? - Well, I mean, it's different.
- It's cool.
Give us two minutes.
- Yeah, sure.
- Bye.
Hang loose.
First of all, OK, what is it with that guy? - What is it with him? - Is he a close friend of yours or? - Barney's totally plugged in.
- He's an idiot.
Ian is concerned that some of Siobhan's preparations for tomorrow - may not be fully there.
- Our online presence - is a key part of who we are.
- It's virtually our virtual front door.
- Yes, and it's virtually off its hinges.
- OK, here's the thing, OK? The thing is, here, OK? OK, here's the thing.
So, the thing is Siobhan, forgive me if I haven't time for the usual pleasantries.
Sure, that's cool.
But get that guy some new glasses, some new hair if need be - Sure.
- Get a new guy, I don't care, whatever, but this needs to be completely sorted by the morning, OK? - That's cool, I'm totally good with that.
- Also, with the clock, I'm going to need a clear, unambiguous explanation of exactly how it works.
- Sure.
- Something even Boris can grasp.
- OK.
- Because I have to say, right now, - I'm really struggling to understand it.
- Absolutely cool.
Kentish Town Road.
Hornsey Rise Meanwhile, Graham Hitchins is burning the midnight oil.
The new traffic light phasing trial has been live for 48 hours and is reaching a crucial stage.
H m, that's quite interesting.
Basically, that's resulted in traffic flows being significantly slower.
- Slower? - Yeah, I know, it's mad.
But I've been thinking about it and I think it's because we've been trialling it in too small an area.
I mean, you're talking about a system that's capable of making six billion decisions a second.
God, that's very decisive.
Yes, so now what we're going to do is trial it in a much bigger area.
- Right.
- OK? So, like, the whole north and north-east London.
- Right.
Is that wise? - Yeah, it is.
Inevitably, it's Friday.
Where is he at this present time? He's still there? No way! No way! But with people gathering outside London's Tate Modern for the official commissioning of Andrew Preston's 1,000 Day Clock and the start of the final countdown to London 2012, so far, there's no sign of either Sebastian Coe or Boris Johnson.
He's been stuck there for, like, an hour.
This is just, like, somebody somewhere just hit "pause", you know? OK, then, I'll meet you at the airport.
I'll meet you there.
No, I won't - there's one every 15 minutes.
Meanwhile, Ian's own final countdown to Barcelona is also now under way.
Laura, the flight's not until 6.
55.
I won't, Laura.
On this one occasion, I won't be useless, OK? So the latest, effective as of now, is that Seb is still - in the Rotherhithe Tunnel.
- Great Also the Central line is down because of unforeseen improvement works.
- What about Boris? - Sure.
- Isn't he on his bike? - OK, so Boris is under police protection.
- Right, do you want to explain that? - Sure, totally.
Um, Boris was threatened by a bunch of cabbies.
Um, because they were angry about the traffic chaos.
- Brilliant, brilliant - OK, so, here's the thing.
Um, I think what we may be looking at here is delaying No, we can't delay it, Siobhan.
The whole point is - Could you take those off? - Sure.
It has to be counting down precisely to the start of the opening ceremony.
- That's the whole point of today.
- OK, OK, so what we do, here's the thing.
- OK, here's where we're at with that.
- OK, now you're babbling.
- Sure.
- So, the clock With both his star speakers now apparently involved in Graham Hitchins' new traffic light phasing trial, Ian knows he's running out of time.
Even if it's not clear which way time is going.
So, um, here's the thing, here's where we're at with this.
The clock is going to be counting down 1,000 days backwards to 2012.
- Right.
Or backwards from 2012? - Sure, exactly.
- Well, there's a difference, Siobhan.
- OK, if you want to be - This is really quite a key - Whether it's from or to No, it's not, Siobhan! - I mean, get over it! - Right.
I'll ask him.
- OK.
Anthony, he's a brilliant guy.
- I don't care.
Hey, Anthony! This is Ian Fletcher, Head of Deliverance for 2012.
- OK, so? - Lan, this is Anthony Preston.
Ian is about to be reminded that the artist isn't always the best person to ask to explain his own creation in actual words.
The clock is sensational.
- I need to double-check - It's counting backwards, love.
So tomorrow, for instance, unless I've got this wrong, - it'll be reading 26th July, 2012? - Sure.
Totally.
- Which is the day before the Olympics? - Absolutely, it's cool.
- What is it with you guys? - So in 1,000 days' time - It's not fucking complicated! - Good.
So in 1,000 days' time - Oh, fuckin' hell.
- OK, so in 1,000 days, it'll be - He's doing my fucking head in.
- Everything's totally cool.
So, basically, just to be clear about this, am I right in thinking that at the start of the Olympics in 2012, this clock will be reading, well, it'll be now, it'll be today? Totally, yeah, totally.
Sure, yeah, that's cool.
Absolutely cool.
Oh, right, he's gone.
Great We're very excited to be working with Anthony Preston Having at last succeeded in clarifying the clock's unique design concept, Ian is now faced with explaining it to the waiting press.
- Why is it counting the wrong way, then? - It isn't counting the wrong way.
Surely it should count towards the Games, not backwards away from them.
No.
If you want my personal take, I think the clock is a powerful and, at the same time, playful comment on time itself.
After all, every year we put the clocks forward, but time goes back.
For now, as we stand here today, the clock points us towards our destination.
When we arrive, it will be reminding us of this day and of the journey we've all taken.
But with still no sign of either Sebastian Coe or Boris Johnson, Ian has reached the point where he has to make a decision.
I don't know who it was who said it's when all the wheels come off at once, you find out who you really are.
It's all very well as an expression, but the problem is, when that happens, what you nearly always find out is that you're the driver.
Still, handbrake off.
Having dealt with one problem, he is now faced with an even bigger one OK, ladies and gentlemen, I think we'll how to formally introduce the public commissioning of the 1,000 Day Clock when neither of the people due to perform that task have managed to make it to the ceremony.
As you know, London 2012 is very much the people's Games, which is why I'm pleased to be able to announce formally today that Peter Andre has agreed to be our principal torch bearer for London 2012.
Whoo! Yay! In that spirit, I think it would only be appropriate, and very much in line with the essence of London 2012, to invite a member of the public to perform the honour of winding up and starting Anthony Preston's magnificent 1,000 Day Clock.
So, Siobhan, if you'd like to perhaps get that process under way? Finding a member of the public to wind up Um, excuse me, my name's Siobhan Sharpe.
Would you come? No? OK.
Hey there, hello! My name's Siobhan Sharpe Professionally, Ian has succeeded in turning a potential disaster into a triumph.
This is Sadie, who's 65, from Surrey.
She's just a member of the public, an ordinary, normal OK, just wind it round.
That's it.
- This is Andrew Preston, our artist.
- Anthony.
- Sadie.
- Great, if you'd like to turn round Could we come to the front of the clock? But it's becoming clear to him that if he's going to be on the flight to Barcelona, he needs to leave for Liverpool Street Station before it's too late to get there.
Just come in the middle, please, thanks.
OK.
OK? Laura, I'm doing my best.
We're moving again now.
Honestly, we're flying along.
I'll be with you in no time.
But there are some things even the Head of Deliverance for London 2012 can't control.
And the science of traffic light phasing turns out to be one of them.
What happens if she gets on the plane - and you don't make it? - Yes, yes.
- Well, let's not count our chickens.
- No.
No, so it's all good.
There may be trouble ahead But while there's moonlight and music and love and romance My name's Siobhan Sharpe.
I'm Head of Brand for London 2012 and I'll be your tour guide today.
Can I just say, I have no idea where this guy's going.
- Let's just assume that he does know.
- Fine.
I'm not interested in how this happened - I'm interested in getting to the Olympic Park by 11.
45 at the latest.
- If you get away a bit earlier.
- When you say early Whoa, whoa! OK.
What we don't want to do is end up going through the Blackwall Tunnel, OK? - So where are we up to? - Right.
Yeah.
No, no! Not the M11! We'll end up at bloody Stansted Airport.
Just keep him there for ten more minutes.
Um, if you So, we'll basically Actually, what roundabout is this? There may be teardrops to shed So while there's moonlight and music And love and romance Let's face the music and dance Let's face the music And dance!