White House Plumbers (2023) s01e01 Episode Script

1
You left the tag on.
Everything I do has a purpose, muchacho.
It's a good plan, boss.
Classic blitzkrieg. Worked in Poland.
Shall we?
Okay. Okay. Fan out.
Slow. Slow.
Let's go.
En serio, alúmbrame, aquí, ¿okay?
Okay.
Chico, un momento, no me apure.
What?
Don't worry, boss.
He's gonna get it.
- Oh, good.
- Okay.
Pasa de grado.
Villo, ¿qué pasa?
These are the wrong tools.
- What?
- He has the wrong tools.
How is that even possible?
- I have right tools!
- He has the right tools.
In Miami.
I'm so sorry, boss.
- Let's go.
- Vamanos.
Entrez-vous.
Howard, I just read the
copy for the HEW account.
It's not quite there yet.
The section on the Child Safety Act.
It just seems flavorless.
So, you want me to make
choking kids more spicy?
- Well
- Christ, Spence,
is that my legacy?
Working on this garbage.
We really need you to
be a little more grateful
for this job, Howard.
Remember, you were unhireable
when the agency dumped you.
This week marks
the tenth anniversary
of the failed invasion
by Cuban exiles to overthrow
Castro, more commonly known
- as the Bay of Pigs.
- Howard?
- Howard, phone!
- The botched invasion
pushed Cuba closer to the Soviet Union.
Repercussions of this event
continue to this day,
where it is now widely seen
as the largest CIA failure ever.
CIA my ass!
It was that chicken-shit
Kennedy's fault.
Sunny boy
You know, you're a half-step flat.
It's like an ice pick to the temple.
Sorry, Papa. I I thought
you were s upstairs.
What is that? Daniel Ellsberg.
How did this leftist
propaganda end up in my house?
We subscribe.
Howard?
Howard! Are you deaf?
It's the White House. Charles Colson.
You hear that?
They can't blame me forever.
I told you they'd call.
Please just listen
to what they have to say.
- Huh.
- Try not to be such
- an asshole.
- Papa! Can you and me go
Papa's gotta an
important call now, kiddo.
Maybe we can celebrate
after with some ice cream.
And it's "Might you and I."
- Ice cream!
- Howard Hunt.
Please hold for Mr. Colson.
Yes, I'll hold.
"He grabbed the secret plans
from her roughly. 'Oh,
Jake. Oh, you bastard.'"
Hey!
Does anybody actually read Papa's books?
- I'm just the typist.
- Chuck! How the hell are you?
Howard, the President asked
for a real son of a bitch
to handle this Pentagon papers leak.
I naturally thought of you.
What do you need?
A Boston judge is now deciding
if Daniel Ellsberg,
who leaked the Pentagon
papers, may be extradited
Move!
From the President on down,
the administration is
determined to discourage
any future leaks. NBC News, Washington.
Colson speaks very highly of you.
That's good to hear.
He doesn't speak highly of anyone.
Nor do they of him.
Jesting. Please don't
tell him I said that.
Of course not.
SIU has been a long time coming,
but this Pentagon papers business
was the final straw.
The country's going to
hell in a hand-basket.
Goddamn Jane Fonda.
People need to understand
they cannot violate
our national security
and get away with it.
The President feels
there's been too much
heel-dragging on these leaks.
Heel-dragging and pussyfooting.
If there's one thing I detest more
than heel-dragging, it's pussyfooting.
Son of a bitch steals 7,000 pages
of top-secret documents and gives it
to the goddamn press? High treason!
I told Colson I think
Ellsberg should be
tarred and feathered and hanged.
Well, then, you and the President
are of the same mind.
Hence, SIU. Special Intelligence Unit.
Oh, look, right.
Uh, Bud, I I I
don't mean to step on
any toes here but, uh,
"Special Intelligence" makes it sound
like we're, uh, mentally handicapped.
That had not occurred to me.
Just make sure he does it
- quickly this time.
- John.
- Bud.
- Oh!
Well, this must be
the, uh, the master spy.
Howard Hunt, John Dean,
White House Counsel.
John.
What a pleasure to meet you.
Likewise, Hunt.
Good luck with your little project.
Don't mind Dean.
He thought SIU should have been his,
but between us,
the President thinks he has
too much old lady in him.
Yeah, well, that explains the hairdo.
I want you to meet Gordon Liddy.
We worked narcotics together
at Treasury. You'll like him.
Toughest guy I know. He
has a thing that he does
to prove his commitment.
He'll hold his hand
in the flame of a candle.
And? What's the trick?
There isn't one. Gets third-degree burns
every time, never flinches.
He's a great guy.
- Real family man.
- Don't touch me!
Gordon.
Now, you're going to
thrust that right there.
Right through the pervert's cartilage,
straight up and into the brain.
And voilà, threat neutralized.
Gordon Liddy. This is Howard Hunt.
Colson made you sound like a, uh
- regular James Bond.
- Funny, he never mentioned you.
Uh, for the record, James
Bond is a work of fiction.
I am the real deal.
- Oh.
- I write fiction,
so I know the difference.
Howard and Colson are both Brown men.
- Oh!
- Where'd you go to school, amigo?
Ah, Fordham.
Hmm, they teach you that
pencil business at Fordham?
We're told Ellsberg
is seeing a psychiatrist.
Uh, Bud, uh, I had a
few ideas about Ellsberg.
You know, I think he might be
There's been a spate of rapes
in the area.
So, I've been teaching
the girls in the office
a little basic self-defense.
Well, let us pray those rapes
happen near pencil sharpeners.
- Gentlemen.
- See, Hunt,
here at SIU, I try and teach my people
to embrace the unorthodox.
- Dream the impossible.
- Your people?
Bud, uh
Maybe I'm a little confused here,
Colson told me that SIU was my op.
With you providing oversight, of course.
You have been given
erroneous information.
SIU is mine.
Everybody knows SIU is
a Gordon Liddy operation.
Gentlemen. As per the President,
I will be heading up SIU.
You two will work together,
you will report to me.
That's the arrangement.
Take it or leave it.
- Roger that, amigo.
- Copacetic.
Nothing makes my heart pound
like a well-tailored pair
of riding pants.
You are such a simple man,
Mr. Hunt.
Sounds like someone's had a good day.
I did indeed.
Makes one of us.
What's the matter?
Lisa's been calling.
In tears.
It's goddamn American University,
it's not Harvard.
Apparently, her professors
do not understand her.
Join the club.
- Mm, really good curry, Mama.
- Oh, thank you, sweetie.
Mm. Next time, perhaps fewer raisins.
No, thank you.
I've got some good news!
They're setting me up
in the White House. Office
with the secretary.
- The West Wing?
- Well, the EOB.
Which is still considered
the White House.
- Cool!
- Only to people
who work in the EOB.
Are you going to meet the President?
- Well, it's funny you ask that.
- It's
probably Lisa again.
Hi, Honey.
Actually, Papa already met the President
when he was vice president.
We had dinner together in Mexico.
- Wow!
- The spicy food, sadly,
did not agree with him,
so he ordered cottage
cheese. With ketchup.
If you're crying.
Oh, Christ! Is it too much
to ask to enjoy one damn meal?
I'll call you back after
dinner. I I love you.
Is Lisa going back to the nuthouse?
No, sweetie. Don't call it that.
It was a hospital.
Christ. All that money to
all those doctors,
right down the commode!
Oh, come on, David.
Let's go wa wa
Watch some TV.
It's been five years
since the car accident.
I mean, she should be better by now.
It wasn't just the accident,
Howard. You know that.
Leave my plate in the icebox.
Howard, we need to have a serious talk.
Not today. Today is a good day.
One, two, three, four!
We don't want your fucking war!
One, two, three, four!
We don't want your fucking war!
One, two, three, four! We
don't want your fucking war!
One, two, three, four! We
don't want your fucking war!
One, two, three, four! We
don't want your fucking war!
One, two, three, four! We
don't want your fucking war!
One, two, three, four! We
don't want your fucking war!
One, two, three, four! We
don't want your fucking
These are the latest
wiretap transcripts.
We have taps on Ellsberg's phones,
as well as those of
his family, associates,
even his Beverly Hills psychiatrist.
I'll be candid, gentlemen.
We don't have a hell of a lot.
I'm sure Ellsberg knows
that his phone is tapped.
- He's no fool.
- What does it say in the file?
Uh, from the psychiatrist?
Dr. Fielding refused
to turn it over to us.
Doctor-patient privilege.
Clearly, they're hiding something.
And what they're hiding is that Ellsberg
is a communist agent.
Connect the dots. Who benefits
from the world thinking
that we can't win in Vietnam?
Hanoi, Russia, China, Cuba.
We have no hard evidence he's a spy.
- Yet.
- A line has been crossed.
Ellsberg needs to be taken down,
publicly discredited and fast.
The President wants extensive
polygraph tests from everyone
with high-level access.
DOD, CIA, FBI and State.
I've taken the liberty
of compiling a list
of 500 or so names,
grouped by department.
Five hundred?
Things have changed quite
a bit since your brief stint
with the Bureau, Gordon.
Director Hoover doesn't believe
in lie detectors anymore.
Our machines are in a basement,
gathering dust.
Well, if we're going to
turn the rats on each other,
we need to create a climate
of fear and distrust.
Nacht und nebel.
Night and fog.
We are not the White House's gestapo.
The President wants these polygraphs.
This is a direct order.
If the President has any questions,
he's welcome to call Director Hoover.
I assure you, the FBI is committed
with all legal means at
our disposal to assist
the White House in stopping leaks.
Gentlemen.
Bud?
Meeting adjourned.
So, I guess it's just you and me
against the entire radical left?
Sisyphus had it easy.
If you and I are the
guys that nail Ellsberg,
Nixon will love us. And by extension,
Project ODESSA!
ODESSA?
Oh, yeah. New name for SIU.
ODESSA is the secret network
that helped the SS officers
get to South America.
And how exactly does that relate
to our current national
security problems?
I already had the stationery made.
You made stationery for a covert op?
We got to get that file
from the psychiatrist.
- Fielding.
- What kind of an idiot Soviet agent
spills his guts to a shrink?
If the FBI can't get their
hands on the file, how would we?
We don't need to steal
Ellsberg's actual psychiatric file,
just photograph it. That will prove
- Hmm.
- He's in bed with the Russians,
and then we'll have
those Pentagon papers
by the short-hairs.
It's a simple black bag job, Bud.
- A black bag job?
- Yeah.
At the Company, we call them black ops,
it's a better name.
The proverbial black
bag refers to the satchel
in which one carries one's tools.
"Black Ops" is subtler.
The point is, Bud,
Fielding will never know
we were there. At this stage,
we're just talking recon,
not infiltration.
Yeah. Yeah, we'll scope out
the good doctor's building,
hallways and see if we can gain entry.
A trip to Beverly Hills.
The CIA will provide us
with cameras,
documents, disguises.
What kind of disguises?
Open.
There you go.
We need driver's licenses,
pocket litter, the whole
kit and caboodle.
Yeah. Try these.
A standard issue
35-millimeter camera as well
as a low-light miniature.
And walkie-talkies.
Walkies are all in use.
You'll have to supply your own.
Here.
Hey, how's that gait-alterer?
Feels like I have a pebble
in my shoe.
I got a pebble in my shoe.
You sure this
isn't too conspicuous for
a clandestine operation?
Exactly!
All they'll remember
about you is the gimmick.
"How tall was he?" "Not sure."
"He walked with a limp."
"Eye color?" "Can't remember."
"Uh, his hair was bizarre."
"I couldn't tell if
it was a wig or not."
Classic misdirection.
Black ops 101.
See!
- He calls it "black bag."
- Oh!
An FBI dipshit.
Oh! How about this weather? Hmm.
- Governor Ronald Reagan.
- Hmm.
Oh, about two blocks.
You're going to take a right.
Apparently, Warren Beatty
lives around here.
- Paul Newman, too.
- Communists.
You don't need
to exaggerate the limp.
I'm not exaggerating.
It hurts.
That's Fielding's office.
Get in the shot. Like a tourist.
Say "cheese!"
- Cheese!
- Ah!
Good.
- Ma'am!
- Mm-hmm?
Might you take a picture
of myself and my friend,
- George F. Leonard.
- Of course.
- Thank you.
- Yeah.
- Actually, no. Uh, here. Here.
- Oh.
Smile, you're on vacation.
Where are you two from?
- Montana.
- Florida.
Uh, okay. Smile!
Yeah, next to the car.
We're in a fucking alley.
Yeah, you're in California.
Look like you're having fun.
A little awkward.
It is what it is.
Hey! That was him! I'm telling you.
John Wayne is not picking up
- his own dry cleaning.
- That was the Duke!
She saw us. Shit. That's
going to be a problem.
Hold on. Uh, i if Consuela
let's us in, there is no crime, right?
- You are the lawyer.
- Ooh. Wait.
- Let me think about
- Hola, señora.
Oh, señorita.
Somos, eh, doctores y amigos
de Dr. Fielding.
Okay.
- What are we doing?
- You are going to leave
a very important message
for our dear friend, Doctor Fielding.
I will wait out here.
Sí!
Gracias.
¿Ustedes son doctores?
Sí, psiquiatras.
Somos muy importante.
All done. With the note.
Doctor, did you forget your glasses?
Yes. Farsighted.
I can't see a thing without them.
Gracias.
Did you photograph the file?
No, the cabinet was locked,
But I shot the whole office.
Mission accomplished, come on!
Out of the tree of life ♪
I just picked me a plum ♪
You came along and
everything started to hum ♪
Still it's a real good bet,
the best is yet to come ♪
The best is yet to come,
come the day you're mine ♪
So good!
Encore!
Thank you! The band is
going to "take five."
Please, be sure to tip your waitress.
That was wonderful, Mr. Hamilton.
Are you a professional musician?
Uh, perhaps in a past life.
Actually, on the QT, my colleague and I
just finished a top-secret
mission for President Nixon.
Oh, Edward! You bull-shitter, you.
This guy.
That's not true.
By the way, why don't you give me
your number and address.
I'll send you my most recent book.
I am a novelist as well.
- Really?
- Yes.
And, uh, maybe when I'm in town
I have a top-secret mission
for you. One more beer, please.
Uh, anything German.
Oh, and some matches, please.
- Mm-hmm.
- Yes.
Hey, hey! What are you doing?
Telling an airborne waitress
that we work for the President?
Just blowing off steam,
amigo. Making new friends.
I promise you, she didn't
believe a word of it.
You okay?
Goddamn ulcer.
This helps.
Look. Now, I appreciate
that you take chances
and, yes, we've gotten results.
But I can't have any fuckups, capisce?
It's too important.
Now, you listen to me, George.
You are not a federal agent anymore,
you are an intelligence agent.
You are a spy.
And if you want to succeed
in this line of work,
you need to be willing
to bend the rules,
color outside the lines.
Sorry, all we have is Budweiser.
Oh, hell, yeah. It sounds German, right?
Oh, thank you.
- What is that?
- Nothing.
- Give me that.
- Don't even think twice.
Give that!
- You better let me see that!
- No, get away from
Let me see! Give it!
Oh!
Linda.
You are a married man, Mr. Hunt.
Howard is. Edward is not.
Just like that!
Just like that, Howard.
- Ed Edward.
- What?
Call me Edward.
Right, yes, sorry. I
Edward, just like that, Edward.
Edward!
The L.A. mission was a success.
That explains it.
It's all coming together, Dot.
You know, the kids have never been
- to Paris.
- Attends, chérie.
They're only paying me
a hundred dollars a day.
Really?
I thought the SIU was your big comeback.
Oh, it is.
They just don't know it yet.
Daniel Ellsberg's
file has to be in that cabinet.
I have to say, fellas
I'm impressed.
You should have seen this guy operate.
He gets the cleaning lady
to let us in. Ergo,
all 100 percent legal.
And they can't ID us.
Oh, yeah. Good luck with
that. And the best part.
- When she leaves at night
- Oh, yeah!
She doesn't even lock the back door.
Slip in, get into the filing cabinet,
slip out.
- In, out.
- Without anyone knowing.
Textbook black op.
Well, I'm going to run
your black bag op by Ehrlichman.
But I think he is going to like it.
Great work.
Plumbers?
We fix leaks.
Oh.
I think everybody prefers ODESSA.
No, no. Plumbers is better. Very clever.
Thank you, Howard.
Yeah.
Come on, come on, come
on, we're running late.
We're not late.
We're ten minutes early, Howard.
- No, we're actually
- Yes. We're ten minutes early.
Uh, listen, he can be
a lot to take at first
but, uh, he he kind of grows on you.
Hmm. Some people say
the same thing about you.
- Psst! Just fix this.
- Please don't touch my hair.
Howard.
Welcome! I'm Frances.
Come in, come in, come in!
Kids, I want you to
say hello to the Hunts.
Hello!
Uh, this is Jim, Tom,
Grace, Alexandra and Raymond.
- Hello!
- Hello!
Tom?
Pleased to meet you, Mr. and Mrs. Hunt.
It's an honor to have
such distinguished members
of the armed forces and,
- uh
- Foreign services.
Foreign services in our home.
And And may I say
what an honor it is to meet such polite
and, uh, well-groomed youngsters.
Take their coats.
May I please take your coat, Mrs. Hunt?
Oh, uh, yes, thank you.
I hear you have a daughter at Smith.
Uh, yes, Kevan.
What an unusual name for a girl. Fun!
Okay. Who would like a drink?
Yes.
There we go, upstairs.
It's just been "Howard this,"
and "Howard that." If
Howard wasn't a man,
- I'd be jealous!
- Well,
- maybe you should be.
- Oh, stop!
So, where did you two meet?
Um, actually, we met in China.
- Oh!
- At work.
So you're also a
Oh, I was. During the war,
I was involved in the recovery
of art stolen by the Nazis.
- Wow!
- Fascinating.
- Mm.
- Just fascinating.
Uh, I don't know, I'm
a history nut myself.
- He is.
- Yeah.
Well, actually, I might
have a little artifact
- that you might find very
- Oh!
Interesting, given your line of work.
You know, when I met Dot,
she was formidable.
Carried a gun, spoke multiple languages,
she was a veritable Bond girl.
Now, I'm just a suburban hausfrau.
Nothing wrong with that.
And she's also a "translator"
at the Spanish Embassy,
- wink-wink.
- I heard that!
- How did you two meet?
- His sister set us up.
I selected Fran for
her high intelligence.
She used to work at IBM.
- Receptionist.
- And of course,
her Celtic/Teutonic genes.
Lineage is very important
to Gordon. Even more
so than intelligence.
I hope you all brought
your appetites tonight,
because Franny makes a mean roast.
I love a good
- Is Is that Hitler?
- Yes.
Franny, do you want to
go check the potatoes?
I set a timer! I'll hear it go off!
See! Intelligence!
Gordon, you don't happen
to have any jazz, do you?
- No.
- Big band era? Benny Goodman?
You know, I know Gene Krupa
You met him once, Howard.
What is he yelling about?
Die Kunst Griechenlands.
What about showtunes?
You have any showtunes?
No. This is better.
He's talking about art
as propaganda for the ancient Greeks.
Of course, he's comparing
the Hellenic ideal
to the Bolshevik
- Oh, God!
- Oh!
Franny, get down!
Oh, it's okay! Just eggs, Gordon.
Just eggs. And some kids.
Fran. Those goddamn
punks are back.
I'm sorry everybody, I'll be right back.
Honey, we have guests.
Why's he going upstairs?
Why don't you ask Hitler?
This whole new house, new school
It's been a bit of an adjustment.
Gordon told the boys
not to take any guff
from the locals, so they've gotten
in their share of dust-ups.
That's what the eggs are about.
- Hmm.
- Such a waste of food.
Boys can be so cruel.
- I know.
- What?
It doesn't matter, Howard.
- Boys.
- Huh?
- Boys!
- Can I freshen your drink?
Mm-hmm.
Do you mind to turn
that down a little bit?
What?
Cheese?
We have all three. Cheddar,
Swiss and Jarlsberg.
Problem solved.
Gordon, your leg again.
We had a civilized chat
and after a little
old-fashioned arm twisting,
they agreed to take
their carousing elsewhere.
- Grace! Ice pack!
- Coming, Mother!
- The potatoes!
- Oh, delicious!
So.
I I know.
- The Nazi stuff.
- Yes.
- And the gun.
- I know.
The sooner you are done
with this guy, the better.
Fran seems nice.
Gordon. I've got some very good news.
- Hello, Bud.
- Where's Hunt?
Bud.
Yes? Good!
Ellsberg mission is a go.
But you two cannot make
the entry yourselves.
You are White House
employees on the payroll.
- Hmm.
- We'll get outside help.
Exchange that for fresh cash
at a bank so it isn't traceable.
Call me when it's done
and for God's sake,
don't get caught.
How are we looking?
What kind of budget is 2600 bucks
- for this kind of op?
- It's not about the money.
My boys would do it for
free. They're patriots.
Oh!
Real Americans.
Better.
Oh. Uh, good afternoon. Are
you gentlemen checking in?
We're not staying here.
Excellent.
Then you're more than
welcome to park in our garage.
Okay.
If you see the maid,
tell her we're out of soap.
The wife gets pretty jazzed
when I bring these home
from traveling.
You are one romantic son
of a bitch, Gordon Liddy.
Well, I try.
It's the boys.
We got off on six
and went up the stairs
to make sure we weren't followed.
- We're on the seventh floor.
- He has the "angina."
Take your nitro, Macho.
Come here.
Fellas, uh, this is
George F. Leonard.
He's ex-FBI.
George, this is Felipe De
Diego, Rolando Martinez,
known as "Musculito,"
and Bernard Barker.
- "Macho."
- Macho.
Macho.
A little birdie told me
you are all Bay of Pigs?
Hmm?
No.
It's okay. He knows.
Then yes.
George, if you want a
can't-lose investment
Miami real estate
- Oh, I don't
- If you ever want to talk property.
- Gentlemen!
- Call me.
Gentlemen.
To old friends!
To new beginnings,
Cuba libre and President Richard Nixon!
Viva Nixon!
And fuck Kennedy!
Fuck Kennedy!
Fuck Kennedy!
Any sign?
No. Fielding is still in his office.
- What is that?
- This?
ZF-41 sniper scope.
World War II vintage.
German, of course.
Of course. Gordon
I have to ask.
What's with the Hitler hard-on?
You know, a lot of us fought in the war.
I'm no Nazi.
Believe me.
And I understand what those people did
was pure evil.
But before the war,
Hoboken was a pretty rough town and I
I was a scrawny little mick,
and used to get the shit
kicked out of me daily.
Scared to even leave the house.
And my nanny, German, Frau Teresa,
she used to put Hitler's speeches on,
you know, on radio.
And there was something
about that voice,
just filled me with the
will to just get out there
and conquer my fears.
And Der Hindenburg.
She used to fly right above my house.
The most incredible sight I'd ever seen.
Bigger than a battleship!
Have you ever considered
that Adolf Hitler and Der Hindenburg
are not ideal templates for success?
You know, well, inspiring nonetheless.
Oh! There's Fielding. We got him.
I know. I can see him with my naked eye.
He's right there.
He's heading to his car,
get ready to follow him.
I'm going to call the Cubans.
Unit One to Unit Two,
the eagle has left the nest. Over.
Copy that, over.
These things are garbage, muchacho.
I spent every dime that Bud gave us.
Oh! That's him, hold this.
Yeah.
- Not too close.
- I know.
- Speed up!
- Right.
Oh, Jesus.
Fuck! Shit! You okay?
Pain is a mental construct.
Shrink's got a nice house.
What a job this poor mope has.
Listening to pantywaists like Ellsberg,
who whine about their mothers all day.
I'm so angry at my mom!
I saw a psychiatrist.
Oh.
A couple of times.
My kids were in a car
accident, years ago.
My eldest, Lisa, she
She banged her head up pretty badly.
- Hmm.
- It
affected her.
Well
A man has got to take
care of his family.
All right. Uh, I'll stay here
and keep eyes on Fielding.
You head back, run point on the Cubans
in the entry. Any hang-ups, radio me.
Roger that.
Oh!
Thanks.
Heading to the back door now.
We are a go. The patient
is with the doctor, over.
Uh, do not copy. Uh,
uh, uh Wait a minute.
Repeat.
Eagle is in the nest. Over.
Do not copy. Repeat. Over.
I said, "The eagle
is still in the nest."
I can't understand you
either, please.
I said the eagle is in the goddamn nest!
The nest!
Press the button all the way in
and speak clearly. Don't shout.
Fuck!
George? We've got a problem.
What kind of problem?
It's locked. We radioed you.
These walkie-talkies are shit, man.
Hey!
- Do not blame the equipment!
- Okay. Okay.
Damn it. It was supposed to be open.
- Any other way in?
- Well
there's that. But
that one's locked, too.
Break the goddamn window.
- ¿Qué te pasó?
- My wrist!
Move, move, move.
Shit, shit, shit!
- Fielding's out of pocket!
- What?
- We have to get the boys out!
- Why didn't you radio me?
- Fellas? Can you hear me?
- That's why!
Ow.
Oh! There they are!
- Muchachos, vamos!
- Vamos, vamos, vamos!
No, no, no!
Okay, full debriefing.
Did we get the file?
There was no Ellsberg file.
Shit!
- You're sure? Nothing?
- Nada.
We went through every
file in that office, man.
We took Polaroids. Nada.
- Rosenberg, Goldberg, Grodberg.
- Pero Ellsberg, no.
Scheisse!
So, we know the file was moved.
Bien hecho.
What are we celebrating?
Well, dollars to donuts, the
file is in Fielding's house.
So to our next mission, adelante!
Adelante!
- Viva Nixon!
- Viva Nixon!
- Viva Nixon!
- Viva Nixon!
Eduardo. You need to see this.
Edward!
Macho
What happened?
We had a little trouble with
the lockon the filing cabinet.
It broke.
So we had to improvise.
Hey!
You know, the whole point
of the operation,
Macho, was for Fielding
to never know that we were there.
George told us to break the window!
- I didn't
- Jesus, Gordon!
Who's Gordon?
You tore the place apart.
Why is all this shit on the floor!
Oh, tranquilo! Tranquilo!
We come up with a plan.
We made a mess, threw some pills around
to make it seem like junkies
were looking for drugs.
Where did you get the pills?
We broke into a doctor's
office down the hall.
May I ask a question?
Ay, caramba.
What kind of a drug addict,
A, brings his own
drugs to a crime scene.
And B, scatters them about the floor
and leaves them behind!
That's a fair point.
That's a fair point.
Hmm.
I know how important those
files were to you, boss.
We didn't want to let you down.
Gentlemen.
Fuck! Fuck, fuck, fuck!
God!
I'm back.
- We bungled the whole thing.
- Howard?
It was a disaster.
This was my last chance,
it's it's over.
Yes. I'm I'm sorry
to hear that but
Dot, I know you don't like Gordon,
but we blew it. It is over! It
Maybe it's fate trying to
Lisa is dropping out of college.
Christ, I did not drop out!
Lisa?
Surprise.
What are you doing home?
I don't know, I just decided
it wasn't a great way
to spend my limited time
on this planet, listening to a bunch
of establishment tools.
Well, sounds like dropping out to me.
See! I knew he was going to say that.
- Honey. She's very upset.
- Yeah, well, so am I!
Does this mean that I can
s skip college, too?
- No.
- Shut up!
We both had very bad days.
Papa tried to deliver a very big project
for President Nixon,
which did not go well,
and you had whatever
difficulties you had.
Take tonight. Get some sleep.
In the morning, I'll
drive you back, pumpkin.
No! First of all, to hell with Nixon!
And I'm not going back there
- you can't make me go back!
- Keep your voice down.
Why! Can Nixon hear me?
Try the breathing, sweetie.
Okay.
You've got this under
control. You don't need me.
You can thank your lucky stars
the LAPD blamed it on a junkie.
Goddamn amateur night with those Cubans.
And I am going to tell
that to to Krogh.
Those Cubans improvised
that whole junkie ruse!
- They saved our asses!
- Oh, hey, Doug.
Would you say this
"black op" is indicative
of the professionalism
and general competence
of your CIA?
Those men were betrayed
by this country
and yet, here they are,
putting their asses on the line
for it again and for zero pay!
Do you know anyone from the FBI
doing this kind of
high-risk work for free?
Damn right you don't.
That's loyalty! That's patriotism!
Do not lecture me on patriotism, friend.
- You can go right in.
- Thank you.
And let the record show,
Gordon Liddy shits red,
- white, and blue.
- Hiya, fellas.
John! Uh
Uh, Gordon, uh, this is, John Dean.
Have a seat.
S so, uh, waiting for Bud?
Oh, no. Bu No. No, Bud's out.
Gentlemen, you're fired.
Congratulations, you're hired.
Liddy, you now work for the Committee
to re-elect the President.
The President needs men of
action and your new mission
is to make sure he wins this election.
Liddy, we'd like you
to be the Committee's
new chief counsel.
Oh.
Thank you, John.
I'm honored.
I hope Howard will be
available to advise.
I will indeed.
Very nice. You'll report
to Jeb Magruder.
He's deputy head over
there and keep me briefed.
S so, I'm clear, Bud
The President doesn't
think he has the stomach
for bare-knuckle tactics.
Too much little old lady in him.
Yeah.
But your commitment, your zeal
Let's just say, you
impressed the right people.
So, uh, what are we talking about here?
Espionage, sabotage, uh,
infiltration, disinformation,
electronic surveillance,
re recruiting
and planting moles, your
various and sundry dirty tricks.
Same shit they do to us every election.
Work up a proposal and budget and, uh,
- dazzle us.
- Uh, say, John,
when you say budget
what size ballpark
are we playing in here?
How much do you think you'll need?
Oh. I'd
Hmm.
For the, uh, scope and, uh,
scale of what it is you're
envisioning, um, I'd say
a million dollars?
Sure. Whatever you guys need.
Sure.
What've we got?
One of our cameras was used in an op
for the White House. They
forgot to take the film out
of the camera when they gave it back.
What the fuck is this?