Young Hercules (1998) s01e01 Episode Script

You know, being a god, living in Olympus, is no job for a weakling.
Take me, for example.
The God of War.
Even I have to work hard.
I'm tired of being a nobody, Ares.
I mean "Strife, the God of War's nephew.
" I mean, what does it say to anybody? I mean, I'm ready for the big time.
Why can't I be, uh "Disaster", or uh "Catastrophe"? Okay, well that's hard to spell.
If you wanna be a real god, you gotta prove yourself worthy! You gotta act like a god and make mortals suffer! Been there, done that! I'm Strife, I'm bad! Try naughty.
If you were any good at being bad, you'd dare what no god has dared before: Destroy a mortal Son of Zeus.
Aha, you mean Hercules.
My half-brother! Alcmene's brat! The apple of my father's all-seeing eye! Hera wants him gone and so do I.
Whoa, whoa! Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa.
Time-out.
Don't get up.
No god can destroy Hercules without being fried forever by Zeus.
Am I right, or am I right? You're half right.
Obviously, we can't attack him directly.
But sometimes, a little Strife can lead to a major catastrophe.
Hercules.
Here I come.
Huh? Hercules.
He attacked me, Ma.
Iolaus.
Hey.
You been working out? Hey, expect the unexpected.
I was moppin' the floor with you till your mom saved you.
How about mopping the floor with this? Bye.
Hey, lolaus.
What? Expect the unexpected.
In an age of light and darkness, Zeus, king of the gods, ruled the universe.
He had a son, young Hercules.
Half-god, half-man, young Hercules longed to find his place in the world, the father he's never known, and what it means to be a hero.
Before the man became legend, before the legend became myth, came the greatest adventure of all.
Ah, you missed a spot, huh? Oh, no you didn't.
Hercules? Uh-huh? I've packed your things for the academy.
I'll go grab my stuff.
You know, there's still a lot of work left to do.
I could, uh How do you think I get by when you're off at the academy? I don't know, I know Zeus doesn't help.
Oh, Hercules, I wish you weren't so obsessed with your father.
Since you were little, you've taken every dare no matter how dangerous or how foolish always trying to prove worthy of Zeus.
That's not true.
Even though you've never met your father, you can't escape your birthright.
But what you become, that's in your hands.
Be a good man.
Be nothing like Zeus.
Hercules.
Mom, he abandoned you.
He gave me the thing I treasure most, you.
Oh, uh.
Now, get going, both of you, before I put you back to work.
Okay.
Take care, Hercules.
Goodbye.
Bye.
Bye, Alcmene, thanks for everything.
Mommy, bye, Mommy! I'll miss you, Mommy! Last decent meal before Cheiron and his academy food.
Hercules, lolaus.
- Jason! - Hey! Looking good, how're things in Corinth? Ah, same old, same old; How's your mom? She's okay.
Hey, you been working out? Yeah, just enough to kick your royal backside.
You and who else? Hey, is that new? It looks like fine Corinthian leather almost fit for a king.
Hey, does it come with a matching crown? Knock it off, knock it off.
That's what I like about Cheiron's academy.
There, I'm just a student, I'm not a prince.
Did I hear that right, you some kind of prince? Uh, yeah.
Yeah, actually, I'm gonna be the king of Corinth.
- Just another student.
- Just another student, right.
Maybe, if you're ever in Corinth, you could drop by and I could show you the palace.
Gee, a palace? I think I might faint! Now, are you two archdukes gonna order, or are you waiting for the king's leftovers? Uh We'll have what he's having and, put all three on my bill.
Mm-hmm, looks empty.
No dinars, no dinner.
That's okay, that's okay, I'm buying.
Um, I'm really tight with the owner here.
He always gives me credit.
Nice try, curly, I'm the owner.
Get ready, here comes Strife.
Tuition's due this week.
How you gonna pay for it if you're broke? Who says I'm broke? Not so rough, guys.
Uh, why don't you keep your hooves to yourself? What are you gonna do about it? Please, no violence.
We're all humans here, more or less.
If I were you, I'd get out of the way.
Academy punks.
Hold it right there! You kiddies wanna play, you take it outside.
When I want things broken around here, I'll hire a dishwasher.
Yeah, like they know how to fight.
Looks like I'm gonna have to put up a sign.
"No shirt, no feet, no service.
" Hey, thanks for standing up for me.
No problem.
Listen, what's your name? Ny Nysus Gaius.
I'm, uh, heading off to Cheiron's academy.
I'm gonna be the new top student there.
Really? That's great, you wanna come sit down? - Surely.
- Let's go.
You know what the hardest part of the academy is? - What? - The ground.
What? Nysus, say hello to Cheiron, our headmaster.
Oh hi, sir.
I didn't recognize you.
I see you're showing the new cadet the ropes.
I hope you're being gentle with him.
As gentle as if you were teaching him yourself, sir.
The tree that grows on the stoniest ground has the strongest roots.
And my uncle said I was hard to understand.
Does he always talk in roots? Yep.
You'll get used to it, come on.
Let's try that drill again.
Yeah, my uncle's the reason why I'm here.
He used to tell me about this place and the academy and a cave up on the mountain.
What cave? Ah, it's nothing famous.
They got a chalice there made by Zeus himself.
Watch your footwork, Hercules! Uh hey, hey, Nysus.
Ah, how you doing? Good, listen, um I was just wondering you know that chalice you were telling me about? The one in the cave? Did you say that Zeus made it? Wedding present for Hera.
But they say he wants it back, now that they don't see much of each other.
Oh, well, uh, if he wants it back, why doesn't he just take it? Well, maybe he promised not to.
Even Zeus has to keep his word.
All this fuss over an ugly old cup she probably never even used.
Yeah, you know? She probably never even used it, anyway, right? Yeah, ha.
- Thanks, Nysus.
- Okay.
Strife.
Is my dear brother hooked? Like a little fish, Uncle, ready for Hera to fry.
Ugh, I've gotta quit doing that.
If Cheiron catches you sneaking out after curfew, he'll kick your rear and he can really kick.
I bet he's sneaking off to see that girl at the inn.
She liked me more than him.
Guys, she didn't like any of us, all right? - Hmm.
- Good point.
Well, if you're not going to the inn, where are you going? Yeah, there's nowhere else to go around here.
There's a cave, it's up in the mountains.
There's a treasure hidden inside it.
The old treasure in the cave story, come on.
It's dangerous, okay? And I don't wanna get you both hurt.
He's trying to get rid of us.
Keep all the glory for himself.
Oh, I don't care about the glory.
I just want the treasure.
Hey, uh, Herc, so what are we talking about here? Is it gold? Silver? It's a chalice.
A chalice? A goblet, a drinking cup.
Thank you, Jason, I know what a chalice is.
I mean, is it gold? Well, I don't really know what it's made of, you know? All I know is that, uh, it belongs to Zeus.
Whoa, hold it; Time out.
You're gonna snag a chalice that belongs to Zeus? Is this one of those father-son things? No, listen, it's not like that this time.
I'm not taking it from Zeus, I'm taking it back to him.
We're gonna spend all night climbing a mountain, so you can get a pat on the back from your dad? I didn't ask you two to come, and I can do this on my own.
All right, all right, we'll come with you.
But if there's anything in the chalice like gold, we split it three ways.
Two ways, all I want is the chalice.
One way, I'm just coming along to keep you jerks out of trouble.
Oh, I love you guys.
Where are the guards protecting this thing? You figure a chalice that belongs to the King of the Gods would be protected.
There's no one around here.
Yeah, how hard can it be? Really? Ask him.
Uh, just in case.
Just in case.
I'm just gonna excuse me.
So, what kind of cave is this, anyway? Are there slimy things in it? 'Cause I really hate those slimy things that live in caves.
Whoa, whoa, guys, get down, get down.
What? I think it's a Phoenix Cave.
Well, how do you know? Well, there's a Phoenix sitting on top of it.
That thing's 20 feet tall.
Yeah, it's probably just a statue to scare people away, You sure? Well no.
There's only one way to find out.
One two three.
Hey, sounds like wood.
Oh, you think so? Come on, let's do it.
Whoa, whoa.
Well, it's a booby trap.
Eh, it looks easy enough.
All right, let's think about this.
Iolaus! See? Iolaus, don't let go.
You never listen, do you? I just got done saying that we need to think about this, and there you go Hey, Jason! Talk about bad timing.
Thanks for the lecture, Jason.
You never listen.
Hey, hey, hey, shh! The chalice.
Cool, Zeus does nice work.
Look out! Thanks.
What do you think's in it? I don't know.
It could be a trap.
Oh, uh, you have a look, then.
Okay.
It looks like water.
Maybe the cave leaks.
Ah, let me see that.
You telling me I came all this way for a drink of water? Hey, I think, uh, I think we should get out of here.
Remember that time when they served us beans in the dining hall for a whole week straight? We had a blast.
Everybody will be in the training hall by now.
Great, I missed breakfast, all for this dumb cup.
Iolaus! Iolaus! Hey, Herc, you gonna do something, or what? What do you think I'm trying to do? Whoa! Thanks, Jas.
Herc, hang on! Oh, like I have a choice? Oh-ho-ho.
Have a nice flight.