A.N.T. Farm (2011) s01e02 Episode Script
ParticipANTs
Let's go! Let's go! Okay, everybody.
This is it! The activity fair.
A great opportunity for you guys to blend in with the big kids.
Well, then, not so sure the preschool safety rope is helping.
Look, as advisor to the A.
N.
T.
Program, I need to make sure that you all stay safe, so that I don't get fired.
So, if you get lost, just blow your panic whistle.
Gibson, are you lost again? Nope, not a problem anymore, Principal Skidmore.
My A.
N.
T.
Pad has a GPS app.
As soon as I learn to speak Korean, this will be really helpful.
Wow, look at all these choices! Physics Club, French Club.
Ooh! Club Sandwich Club! What are you doing? Chyna, this school is a jungle.
We're baby gazelles, prancing around, all wide-eyed and innocent.
"Oh, look, a watering hole.
"I think I'll stop and take a drink.
" Next thing you know, snap! A crocodile bites your head off! You really need to stop watching those nature specials.
Sometimes, they show them pooping.
Look, we're only required to do one extracurricular activity and you already signed up for the school musical.
To audition.
But I'm up against Lexi, so who knows if I'll even get a good part.
I mean, the play could be Cats, and I could end up being the litter box.
Hello, ladies.
Ooh! See? There you go.
Fletcher's getting into the spirit of things.
He's signing up for the Renaissance Club.
No! I'm wearing this to protect myself from the big kids.
Hey, could you pull that down for me? Yeah.
While I'm inside this, nothing can hurt me.
Wow, the Physics Club is very desperate for members.
Ooh, ooh Doo, doo Ooh, ooh Doo, doo Whoo! Everybody's got that thing Something different we all bring Don't you let 'em clip your wings You got it You got it We're on fire and we blaze In extraordinary ways 365 days We got it We got it You can dream it You can be it If you can feel it You can believe it 'Cause I am, you are, we are Exceptional Exceptional Yeah, I am, you are, we are Exceptional Exceptional Ooh, ooh, ooh Ooh, ooh Whoo! Try out for cheer! Sign up here! Jump up and wave your arms! Don't set off the fire alarms! What? That's a really good message.
Cameron, you joined Photography Club? Nope.
Yearbook? Nope.
Uh-oh.
There's Lexi, the biggest, of them all.
odile.
Unfortunately, unlike the chameleon or the Indonesian mimic octopus, we have no natural camouflage abilities.
Oh, maybe we do.
Here, just put that on.
Hey, Chyna.
What are you so happy about? Hey, Lexi.
Hey, Paisley.
So, Chyna, are you going to try out for cheerleading? You totally should.
You think? Don't stop to drink! Don't stop to drink! Yeah, you'd be great! You're good at music and dance.
And you've got a really great smile.
Maybe I will sign up.
I can't let you do this.
Ow! Ooh! I found a pen.
Score! Forget it.
I am not joining the cheerleaders.
It goes against everything I stand for as a feminist.
Plus, I'm scared of them.
Besides, we'd make total fools of ourselves.
My dad says if you really commit to something and do your best, you will never look like a fool.
Of course, he wears black knee socks with sandals, but we will overlook that.
Come on, it won't be fun unless we do it together.
Well, I'm nothing if not fun.
Oh, hey, Fletcher.
How did it go at the Chess Club? Not well.
Next up is Alive.
Um, my name is Olive.
Oh, okay, Olive! You can go since this Alive girl didn't show up.
Okay, I'm going to do a cheer that I wrote myself in honor of our beloved team, the Webster Wolves.
Wolves are tough! Wolves are strong! Wolves are typically Canis lupus they're called in Latin! On badgers, mice, and fox they fatten! Howling consists of a fundamental frequency, which lies between 150 and 780 hertz, and consists of up to 12 harmonically related overtones! Why are you blowing your whistle? Is someone lost? Olive, your cheer was very educational.
I learned that I hate you.
Next! Mmm.
Ka-hyna? It's Chyna.
People shouldn't sign up if they're not going to show.
Okay.
So.
Shake it to the left! Shake it to the right! Stand up, Wolves, and fight, fight, fight! Push them back! Push them back! Wolves attack! Ow! My nose! Oh, my gosh! I'm so sorry! I think it's bleeding! Oh, wait, no, you're supposed to tilt your head forward.
Ow! My wolf cheer isn't looking so bad now, is it? Uh, I must have the wrong room.
I was hoping to join the End Hunger Today Club? Sorry, we're full.
But there is no one here except you.
Fine.
Look, we'll take a vote.
All in favor of letting Fletcher into the club? All opposed? Sorry, it's unanimous.
Are you even trying to end hunger? You're just eating Buffalo wings.
And thus, ending my hunger.
I feel if I can help just one person, then, I'm making a difference.
So the End Hunger Today Club just uses school funds to buy Buffalo wings? That was the founder's vision.
Mmm.
Well, I don't think Principal Skidmore would approve of this.
What's your point, Ant? Let me in your club or I'll tell her about your little scam.
Everyone, let's welcome our new member, Fletcher! Well, Olive, you were right.
Our tryouts were a complete disaster.
We'll do something else together.
Uh, Paisley, I am so, so, so sorry about your nose.
Oh, don't be.
I'm hoping it's broken, so my mom will finally let me get a nose job! So, Chyna, about your audition No, it's okay.
Being a cheerleader isn't even important to us anymore.
Olive and I are going to find something better to do together.
Chyna, you made the squad! Oh, my gosh! I'm a cheerleader! This is the greatest day of my life! Oh, and by the way, Olive, even though you didn't make the squad, I did type up your wolf cheer and turn it in as my biology paper.
A-plus.
Come on, Chyna.
Let's go get your uniform.
Hey, Olive.
Aw, you look sad.
Tissue? Angus! Angus! He's our man.
If he can't hack into the CIA classified database, nobody can! Hey, uh, why are you talking like that? Lexi says to do it right, I must cheer both day and night! Okay, um, where were you at lunch? Sorry I didn't eat with you! Cheerleaders met from 1:00 to 2:00! Uh, fine.
Um.
Hey, wanna come over after school then? We can make historical hats for my turtle.
The squad is getting their hair done! Lexi says it's lots of fun! Can I take a rain check Cheer again, I'll punch your neck.
I can't believe you're making friends with Lexi.
I mean, it's not natural.
Have you ever seen a gazelle and a crocodile sign each other's yearbooks? She's not so bad! Now I have to leave! It takes forever to get a weave! Well Whatever! I have plenty of other friends! I'll just hang out with Angus instead! All right! I've been waiting for this moment.
As President of the End Hunger Today Club, I call this meeting to order.
First item of business, Buffalo wings.
Uh, President? I don't remember us having an election.
Fine, look, we'll have an election.
Who votes for Cameron? I can't help it.
You're just so darn charismatic.
Okay.
So, what did you order? "Mild, mild medium, medium, medium hot, "hot, extra hot, or 'Ah! Get this out of my mouth!'" Just see for yourself.
Aah! Get this out of my mouth! Actually, those are the medium.
I don't care, get this out of my mouth.
Ready? Okay! Front to back! Left to right! Come on, Wolves! Let's fight, fight, fight! Oh! Chyna, you may be an Ant, but you need to sound like a Wolf.
Oh.
Just be louder.
Okay.
Let's form a cheer line! Ow! Ooh! Okay, let's work on our basket toss.
Yay! Chyna! Get in the basket.
Did you say basket or casket? Come on, it's fun! Okay.
Ready? No, actually Where'd she go? I'm over here.
Can somebody please help me down? Never mind.
Okay, now we practice pom-poms.
Good.
That sounds safer.
For night games! Hot! Hot! It's too bad we don't have marshmallows.
We can make s'mores.
Okay, Chyna, why don't you lead us in the final cheer? Come on! Nice and loud! Big smile! Let me see those teeth! I think there may be a couple over there on the floor.
Ready? Let's go! Give me a "W"! "W"! Give me an "O"! "O"! Give me a Oh, no! You lost your voice? This is terrible.
Now, you won't be able to lead us in the final cheer or audition for the school musical tomorrow.
Oh, are those tears coming out of your one eye that isn't swollen shut? Sorry, I don't have any tissues.
Someone say they needed a tissue? Care to make a donation? Donation.
Care to make a donation? Mr.
Zimbaldi.
Care to make a donation a better place? E world.
Are you trying to cure baldness? No.
There you are, man.
Look, I've been sitting here for an hour and all we've got is 35 cents, a chewed up piece of gum, and an arcade ticket.
Ooh, I collect those.
What's the point? You need like a million tickets to get anything good.
No, I meant the chewed up gum.
Look, you said we were going to make money! But nobody's giving us anything.
They just need a little incentive.
Oprah? How did you get Oprah to endorse us? I simply looked up the number to her headquarters in Chicago, called her, and when they wouldn't put me through, I made the poster anyway.
Uh-huh.
Usually when I cornrow Chyna's hair, I don't actually find corn in it.
Oh, so that's where that went! Ew, gross.
If you're going to be all judgy, maybe you should find someone else to play with.
No, Angus! You'll come around.
Ugh! Chyna? What happened to you? You lost your voice? Then act out what happened.
You were at the airport helping planes land.
Oh, oh, oh! But the union guys didn't like that, did they? So they roughed you up.
Use the voice app on my A.
N.
T.
Pad.
Just type in what you want to say.
Use your tongue.
You wore rigatoni about Lexi.
She is oval.
I shoulder have licensed to you.
Oh, my gosh.
Lexi did this? I am soupy.
Apology accepted.
Ow.
Well, what are you going to do about the musical? What? Look, but you have to audition.
You may be bloodied, grotesque and near impossible to look at, but as my best friend once said, "If you really commit to something and do your best, "you'll never look like a fool.
" I don't remember saying that.
This is fantastic.
Like for so many others, our dreams come true.
Yeah.
But instead of the bling bling, we got the wing wing! Don't ever say that again.
Seriously, strike that from the minutes.
So, this is the End Hunger Today Club? It was his idea! Oh, Cameron.
You should be commended.
It's wonderful to see students get behind a worthwhile cause like this.
Well, Principal Skidmore, the one hunger that will never end is my hunger to help people.
Uh-oh, our wings are here! Uh, he means our angel wings, which we've earned by doing such good work.
What? These are Buffalo wings.
Get these out of my sight.
Just set them outside.
Wait! I know what's going on here.
You two have created a fake club and are using school funds and fraudulent donations to sit here and eat Buffalo wings! He thought up the fundraiser! He started the club! I am an innocent pawn.
And he the one that called Oprah! I don't care who did what.
What's important here is I want in! Thank you.
Next! Lexi! Lexi Oh, there you are.
For my audition, I will be singing a song that I wrote.
Marshmallow marshes and gumdrop trees Chocolate bunnies and gummy bees Doors made of s'mores and streets of sweets You'll never feel down when you're in Candy Town! Aw, wonderful, Lexi! That was so sweet, I'm worried about my blood sugar.
Oh, thank you.
No, seriously, I may faint.
Next up, uh, Chyna! Chyna! Chyna! Chyna! Holy crab cakes! Okay.
Smiles don't cost you anything So just be happy and sing Sing, sing What are you all looking at? Stop staring at me! You think I asked to be like this? I just want to belong and to fit in.
I may look hideous, but I have feelings! I am not a freak! I am a human being! Chyna, that was amazing! That was the best monologue I've ever heard.
That was from The Hunchback of Notre Dame, right? Uh.
Sure.
I mean, I knew you could sing, but your acting skills, wow! Not to mention your amazing talent with prosthetic make up.
I don't need to see anybody else.
Chyna's gonna be the lead of the school play.
- What? - Chyna's gonna be the lead of the school play.
Gibson, Lexi needs a tissue.
Oh, there you are, fletcher.
Mmm! What do you want? Well, I still need activity.
Urricular.
Is this uh, I want to join.
Y club? Sorry, we're full! But there's only three people here.
I said we're full! Come on, guys Before I eat it all.
This is it! The activity fair.
A great opportunity for you guys to blend in with the big kids.
Well, then, not so sure the preschool safety rope is helping.
Look, as advisor to the A.
N.
T.
Program, I need to make sure that you all stay safe, so that I don't get fired.
So, if you get lost, just blow your panic whistle.
Gibson, are you lost again? Nope, not a problem anymore, Principal Skidmore.
My A.
N.
T.
Pad has a GPS app.
As soon as I learn to speak Korean, this will be really helpful.
Wow, look at all these choices! Physics Club, French Club.
Ooh! Club Sandwich Club! What are you doing? Chyna, this school is a jungle.
We're baby gazelles, prancing around, all wide-eyed and innocent.
"Oh, look, a watering hole.
"I think I'll stop and take a drink.
" Next thing you know, snap! A crocodile bites your head off! You really need to stop watching those nature specials.
Sometimes, they show them pooping.
Look, we're only required to do one extracurricular activity and you already signed up for the school musical.
To audition.
But I'm up against Lexi, so who knows if I'll even get a good part.
I mean, the play could be Cats, and I could end up being the litter box.
Hello, ladies.
Ooh! See? There you go.
Fletcher's getting into the spirit of things.
He's signing up for the Renaissance Club.
No! I'm wearing this to protect myself from the big kids.
Hey, could you pull that down for me? Yeah.
While I'm inside this, nothing can hurt me.
Wow, the Physics Club is very desperate for members.
Ooh, ooh Doo, doo Ooh, ooh Doo, doo Whoo! Everybody's got that thing Something different we all bring Don't you let 'em clip your wings You got it You got it We're on fire and we blaze In extraordinary ways 365 days We got it We got it You can dream it You can be it If you can feel it You can believe it 'Cause I am, you are, we are Exceptional Exceptional Yeah, I am, you are, we are Exceptional Exceptional Ooh, ooh, ooh Ooh, ooh Whoo! Try out for cheer! Sign up here! Jump up and wave your arms! Don't set off the fire alarms! What? That's a really good message.
Cameron, you joined Photography Club? Nope.
Yearbook? Nope.
Uh-oh.
There's Lexi, the biggest, of them all.
odile.
Unfortunately, unlike the chameleon or the Indonesian mimic octopus, we have no natural camouflage abilities.
Oh, maybe we do.
Here, just put that on.
Hey, Chyna.
What are you so happy about? Hey, Lexi.
Hey, Paisley.
So, Chyna, are you going to try out for cheerleading? You totally should.
You think? Don't stop to drink! Don't stop to drink! Yeah, you'd be great! You're good at music and dance.
And you've got a really great smile.
Maybe I will sign up.
I can't let you do this.
Ow! Ooh! I found a pen.
Score! Forget it.
I am not joining the cheerleaders.
It goes against everything I stand for as a feminist.
Plus, I'm scared of them.
Besides, we'd make total fools of ourselves.
My dad says if you really commit to something and do your best, you will never look like a fool.
Of course, he wears black knee socks with sandals, but we will overlook that.
Come on, it won't be fun unless we do it together.
Well, I'm nothing if not fun.
Oh, hey, Fletcher.
How did it go at the Chess Club? Not well.
Next up is Alive.
Um, my name is Olive.
Oh, okay, Olive! You can go since this Alive girl didn't show up.
Okay, I'm going to do a cheer that I wrote myself in honor of our beloved team, the Webster Wolves.
Wolves are tough! Wolves are strong! Wolves are typically Canis lupus they're called in Latin! On badgers, mice, and fox they fatten! Howling consists of a fundamental frequency, which lies between 150 and 780 hertz, and consists of up to 12 harmonically related overtones! Why are you blowing your whistle? Is someone lost? Olive, your cheer was very educational.
I learned that I hate you.
Next! Mmm.
Ka-hyna? It's Chyna.
People shouldn't sign up if they're not going to show.
Okay.
So.
Shake it to the left! Shake it to the right! Stand up, Wolves, and fight, fight, fight! Push them back! Push them back! Wolves attack! Ow! My nose! Oh, my gosh! I'm so sorry! I think it's bleeding! Oh, wait, no, you're supposed to tilt your head forward.
Ow! My wolf cheer isn't looking so bad now, is it? Uh, I must have the wrong room.
I was hoping to join the End Hunger Today Club? Sorry, we're full.
But there is no one here except you.
Fine.
Look, we'll take a vote.
All in favor of letting Fletcher into the club? All opposed? Sorry, it's unanimous.
Are you even trying to end hunger? You're just eating Buffalo wings.
And thus, ending my hunger.
I feel if I can help just one person, then, I'm making a difference.
So the End Hunger Today Club just uses school funds to buy Buffalo wings? That was the founder's vision.
Mmm.
Well, I don't think Principal Skidmore would approve of this.
What's your point, Ant? Let me in your club or I'll tell her about your little scam.
Everyone, let's welcome our new member, Fletcher! Well, Olive, you were right.
Our tryouts were a complete disaster.
We'll do something else together.
Uh, Paisley, I am so, so, so sorry about your nose.
Oh, don't be.
I'm hoping it's broken, so my mom will finally let me get a nose job! So, Chyna, about your audition No, it's okay.
Being a cheerleader isn't even important to us anymore.
Olive and I are going to find something better to do together.
Chyna, you made the squad! Oh, my gosh! I'm a cheerleader! This is the greatest day of my life! Oh, and by the way, Olive, even though you didn't make the squad, I did type up your wolf cheer and turn it in as my biology paper.
A-plus.
Come on, Chyna.
Let's go get your uniform.
Hey, Olive.
Aw, you look sad.
Tissue? Angus! Angus! He's our man.
If he can't hack into the CIA classified database, nobody can! Hey, uh, why are you talking like that? Lexi says to do it right, I must cheer both day and night! Okay, um, where were you at lunch? Sorry I didn't eat with you! Cheerleaders met from 1:00 to 2:00! Uh, fine.
Um.
Hey, wanna come over after school then? We can make historical hats for my turtle.
The squad is getting their hair done! Lexi says it's lots of fun! Can I take a rain check Cheer again, I'll punch your neck.
I can't believe you're making friends with Lexi.
I mean, it's not natural.
Have you ever seen a gazelle and a crocodile sign each other's yearbooks? She's not so bad! Now I have to leave! It takes forever to get a weave! Well Whatever! I have plenty of other friends! I'll just hang out with Angus instead! All right! I've been waiting for this moment.
As President of the End Hunger Today Club, I call this meeting to order.
First item of business, Buffalo wings.
Uh, President? I don't remember us having an election.
Fine, look, we'll have an election.
Who votes for Cameron? I can't help it.
You're just so darn charismatic.
Okay.
So, what did you order? "Mild, mild medium, medium, medium hot, "hot, extra hot, or 'Ah! Get this out of my mouth!'" Just see for yourself.
Aah! Get this out of my mouth! Actually, those are the medium.
I don't care, get this out of my mouth.
Ready? Okay! Front to back! Left to right! Come on, Wolves! Let's fight, fight, fight! Oh! Chyna, you may be an Ant, but you need to sound like a Wolf.
Oh.
Just be louder.
Okay.
Let's form a cheer line! Ow! Ooh! Okay, let's work on our basket toss.
Yay! Chyna! Get in the basket.
Did you say basket or casket? Come on, it's fun! Okay.
Ready? No, actually Where'd she go? I'm over here.
Can somebody please help me down? Never mind.
Okay, now we practice pom-poms.
Good.
That sounds safer.
For night games! Hot! Hot! It's too bad we don't have marshmallows.
We can make s'mores.
Okay, Chyna, why don't you lead us in the final cheer? Come on! Nice and loud! Big smile! Let me see those teeth! I think there may be a couple over there on the floor.
Ready? Let's go! Give me a "W"! "W"! Give me an "O"! "O"! Give me a Oh, no! You lost your voice? This is terrible.
Now, you won't be able to lead us in the final cheer or audition for the school musical tomorrow.
Oh, are those tears coming out of your one eye that isn't swollen shut? Sorry, I don't have any tissues.
Someone say they needed a tissue? Care to make a donation? Donation.
Care to make a donation? Mr.
Zimbaldi.
Care to make a donation a better place? E world.
Are you trying to cure baldness? No.
There you are, man.
Look, I've been sitting here for an hour and all we've got is 35 cents, a chewed up piece of gum, and an arcade ticket.
Ooh, I collect those.
What's the point? You need like a million tickets to get anything good.
No, I meant the chewed up gum.
Look, you said we were going to make money! But nobody's giving us anything.
They just need a little incentive.
Oprah? How did you get Oprah to endorse us? I simply looked up the number to her headquarters in Chicago, called her, and when they wouldn't put me through, I made the poster anyway.
Uh-huh.
Usually when I cornrow Chyna's hair, I don't actually find corn in it.
Oh, so that's where that went! Ew, gross.
If you're going to be all judgy, maybe you should find someone else to play with.
No, Angus! You'll come around.
Ugh! Chyna? What happened to you? You lost your voice? Then act out what happened.
You were at the airport helping planes land.
Oh, oh, oh! But the union guys didn't like that, did they? So they roughed you up.
Use the voice app on my A.
N.
T.
Pad.
Just type in what you want to say.
Use your tongue.
You wore rigatoni about Lexi.
She is oval.
I shoulder have licensed to you.
Oh, my gosh.
Lexi did this? I am soupy.
Apology accepted.
Ow.
Well, what are you going to do about the musical? What? Look, but you have to audition.
You may be bloodied, grotesque and near impossible to look at, but as my best friend once said, "If you really commit to something and do your best, "you'll never look like a fool.
" I don't remember saying that.
This is fantastic.
Like for so many others, our dreams come true.
Yeah.
But instead of the bling bling, we got the wing wing! Don't ever say that again.
Seriously, strike that from the minutes.
So, this is the End Hunger Today Club? It was his idea! Oh, Cameron.
You should be commended.
It's wonderful to see students get behind a worthwhile cause like this.
Well, Principal Skidmore, the one hunger that will never end is my hunger to help people.
Uh-oh, our wings are here! Uh, he means our angel wings, which we've earned by doing such good work.
What? These are Buffalo wings.
Get these out of my sight.
Just set them outside.
Wait! I know what's going on here.
You two have created a fake club and are using school funds and fraudulent donations to sit here and eat Buffalo wings! He thought up the fundraiser! He started the club! I am an innocent pawn.
And he the one that called Oprah! I don't care who did what.
What's important here is I want in! Thank you.
Next! Lexi! Lexi Oh, there you are.
For my audition, I will be singing a song that I wrote.
Marshmallow marshes and gumdrop trees Chocolate bunnies and gummy bees Doors made of s'mores and streets of sweets You'll never feel down when you're in Candy Town! Aw, wonderful, Lexi! That was so sweet, I'm worried about my blood sugar.
Oh, thank you.
No, seriously, I may faint.
Next up, uh, Chyna! Chyna! Chyna! Chyna! Holy crab cakes! Okay.
Smiles don't cost you anything So just be happy and sing Sing, sing What are you all looking at? Stop staring at me! You think I asked to be like this? I just want to belong and to fit in.
I may look hideous, but I have feelings! I am not a freak! I am a human being! Chyna, that was amazing! That was the best monologue I've ever heard.
That was from The Hunchback of Notre Dame, right? Uh.
Sure.
I mean, I knew you could sing, but your acting skills, wow! Not to mention your amazing talent with prosthetic make up.
I don't need to see anybody else.
Chyna's gonna be the lead of the school play.
- What? - Chyna's gonna be the lead of the school play.
Gibson, Lexi needs a tissue.
Oh, there you are, fletcher.
Mmm! What do you want? Well, I still need activity.
Urricular.
Is this uh, I want to join.
Y club? Sorry, we're full! But there's only three people here.
I said we're full! Come on, guys Before I eat it all.