Austin and Ally s01e02 Episode Script

This violin is made of The finest maple wood.
It was, uh huh.
Uh, it was hand carved Would you excuse me for a sec? Yeah.
Do you guys have to do that here? Hey, we're not complaining that you're working.
Right in the middle of our Banjo badminton court.
We'd rather be making a video, But somebody hasn't finished writing the song yet.
I'm busy working.
Fine.
Then we're busy badmintoning.
Game point! Would you like to pay cash for that or should I put it on your tab? Just put it on the tab.
Oh, okay.
Well, I am off to the accordion convention.
And "accordion" to my watch, I should have left an hour ago.
Well, sweetie, you are in charge.
The store looks a little crowded.
- Are you sure you'll be okay? - Actually, dad, - I probably - Glad to hear it.
Bye-bye.
Who's next? Okay, wait.
Um, here's your change.
Your kazoo.
Uh, the trumpets are over there.
No, this isn't the eye doctor.
Oh.
Guess who got a job at the yo-yo cart? Watch this.
Whoo, wait.
Whoo, I can do this.
Hold on.
It's my first day and Probably my last.
So, Ally, have you finished writing Austin's new song? It-it's almost done.
I've just been really busy lately.
I've got work, school, book club.
I have to read this by tomorrow.
Tomorrow of what year? Well, we need a song.
I can't make a video without a song.
Hey, it's not like I've been spending all my free time.
Training to eat a 20-lb hamburger.
You're just jealous.
Ally, if we don't get a new video up on the website quick, People are gonna forget who Austin is.
Seriously, it's been a whole month since the last video.
Guys, cut Ally some slack.
A month isn't that long.
It's pretty hard to forget Austin moon.
Hey, it's ralphie Hayes from the dog food commercial! Oh my Dog food commercial? Ally, you gotta finish that song now! Fine.
Y-you want the song? Ah! Here! See? That wasn't so hard.
No way! It's the guy who won the Can I have your autograph? Sure.
Turn around.
Yeah.
Huh.
Oh.
when the crowd wants more I bring on the thunder 'cause you've got my back and I'm not going under you're my point, you're my guard you're the perfect chord and I see our names together on every billboard we're headed for the top, we've got it on lock we'll make 'em say "hey!" and we'll keep rockin' oh, there's no way I could make it without ya do it without ya, be here without ya it's no fun when you're doing it solo with you it's like, "whoa," yeah, and I know I own this dream 'cause I got you with me there's no way I could make it without ya do it without ya, be here without ya.
Ralphie Hayes here for yummy time dog food.
So good a human can eat it.
Do not eat.
Yummy time dog food is for dogs only.
Yummy.
Are you kidding me? That guy doesn't look like me at all.
This dog food horrible.
This video soon.
I don't want to be remembered as the guy.
Who looks like horrible-tasting dog food.
Guess who got a job at the dry-cleaner's? What happened to your job at the yo-yo cart? - It's a long, - You got fired.
Ry.
Huh, I guess or complicated.
Ong.
Check out this amazing jacket I'm borrowing from work for the music video.
Doesn't that belong to somebody? Yeah.
Some big burly ultimate fighter guy.
Named facepuncher.
Facepuncher? A guy named facepuncher? You know what he's gonna do?! Facepunch! Don't worry about it.
He'll never know.
He's gonna pick the jacket up at 8:00.
Wait, what does the jacket have to do with the music video? It's a line in Ally's song, "my jacket's in the lost and found.
" "my jacket"? It says "I like it.
" The line is "I like it when you hang around.
" "hang around"? I thought it said "kangaroo.
" I like it when you kangaroo.
.
Why would I write "I like it when you kangaroo"? Look, nobody's accusing you of writing good lyrics.
Uh, those aren't the lyrics.
My handwriting was only sloppy because everyone was rushing me.
I went to calligraphy camp! Book club, calligraphy camp Now you're just making stuff up.
Well, whatever.
I still think Austin wearing a cool leather jacket.
Singing with a kangaroo would make an awesome music video.
I don't know.
I'm starting to worry about this video.
I think we need to come up with a better idea.
Yeah, it might be a little late for that.
Did somebody order a kangaroo? Oh, he is so cute.
Oh, I just stepped in kangaroo poop.
Whoa whoa, not so fast.
You don't know that was the kangaroo.
Trish was in here earlier.
I will smack those freckles right off your face.
So what's this kangaroo gonna do in my video besides poop? Well, I was thinking he could be in the band.
That's a great idea.
Hey, buddy, wanna play some guitar? I think he'd rather play drums.
The window! Oh, the jacket! - The door! - What's wrong with the door? Nothing.
I thought we were just naming stuff in the room.
No.
The kangaroo is chewing facepuncher's jacket! Come on, let it go.
Let it go.
Let it go.
Come on, kangaroo.
Come on, let it go, kangaroo.
Let it go, let it go.
Let it go, let it go.
Come on, come on.
Come on, let it go.
Let it go! Let it go, let it go.
Oh-hh, what is this? - It's caramel.
- Caramel? Why? I couldn't read Ally's handwriting and I wasn't sure if she wrote "camel" Or "caramel," so I just got them both.
You ordered a camel too?! Uh, no-oo.
Did somebody order a camel? We've got to fix this mess before my dad gets back.
We have to fix the jacket.
Facepuncher's coming back at 8:00.
I could lose my job, which I don't care about.
But still, he might facepunch me.
And someone's gonna have to mop up all this Trish poop.
Mm, keep it up and someone's gonna have to mop up all your freckles.
My freckles are my friends! Can you say that about your poop? - So what about my video? - Can we worry.
About something other than your career for one minute? I barely have a career.
If you wouldn't have taken a whole month to write a new song, Maybe people wouldn't think I'm the dog food guy.
Hang on.
Are you actually blaming me.
Because you think you're not as popular as you used to be? No, of course not.
I'm just saying that maybe if you'd written the song faster, Then we'd have you know what? Now that I'm saying this out loud, I think that is what I was saying.
I can't just spit out a song.
Anytime you want me to.
Lyrics don't just flow out of me.
Like a River after a rain of tears.
Oh, that's good.
Hey, Ally, you know what? Maybe you should write that so we could actually read it this time.
Yeah, miss calligraphy camp.
Huh.
Can you read this? Yes, I can, And that is not a nice word.
There's gotta be some way we can clean this jacket.
You work at a dry-cleaner's.
Right! I bet there's some sort of jacket-cleaning machine.
I'd better go with you.
You guys watch the store.
I'll call Martin the mall maintenance man to fix the window.
My dad sees this mess, I'm toast.
And if we don't fix facepuncher's jacket, I'm toast.
And if we don't get a good video up on the site soon, My whole career is toast.
Anyone else craving toast right now? And I don't know what Austin expects.
He doesn't appreciate the fact that I can't spend.
Every minute of every day writing songs.
And even if I could, it takes time to write a good song.
He needs to understand that trying to rush you doesn't help anything.
Thanks, Trish.
I knew you would Hurry up with the jacket! We don't have all day! I don't know.
I don't know.
I don't know.
No, this isn't the ear doctor! Austin! Austin, little help, please.
I'm really busy.
I promised Ally I'd watch the store.
I can't just leave a stranger in charge.
Hey, stranger, you're in charge! I'm coming, buddy! Ugh, I tried, like, seven different things.
Everything I use keeps getting caramelled to the jacket.
That's him! That's facepuncher! - I'm here for my jacket.
- Uh, you're facepuncher? You don't look like a facepuncher.
You look like a hand holder or a hug giver.
No hug.
Uh, you're early.
The jacket's not supposed to be ready until 8:00.
No.
It's supposed to be ready now.
Oh, look at that.
You're right.
I misread the ticket.
It's 'cause I'm a horrible employee.
Ask anybody.
Actually, she wouldn't be that bad if she just applied herself.
- Ally! - She is the worst! I'll be back at 8:00.
And it better be ready 'cause mad dog's gonna be with me, And mad dog hates waiting.
Ooh, that was close.
Close? He'll be back in a few hours.
And he's bringing mad dog with him.
Oh right.
Maybe this super-duper washing machine will do the trick.
- Do you know how to use that thing? - Of course not.
- I'm trying.
- You can do it.
I'll be right with you.
- You see the kangaroo too, right? - Uh-huh.
- You'll never guess what happened! - The kangaroo ran away.
Man, you're good at this game.
How could you lose a kangaroo?! I was attaching a camera to its pouch.
When I accidentally stepped on its tail.
And woke him up from a deep dark sleep, And then for no reason he just freaked out.
Why would you attach a camera to a kangaroo? Because we're trying to make an awesome video.
Are me and Dez the only ones who care about my career anymore? I care about your career.
I'm just not gonna overreact.
Because one person didn't know who you were.
Hey, Ally, I'm here to whoa, it's ralphie Hayes the dog food guy! I'm not the dog food guy.
Hey, Martin, can you fix the window before my dad gets back? No problem, I fix a lot of whoa, this thing is really broken! You are in so much trouble.
This is bad! This is bad! Calm down, Martin.
How much is it going to cost? Uh, probably not whoa, this is gonna cost a lot! That's double-paned glass.
I gotta get it custom built, Then I gotta pick it up and it's so hard to find parking.
And the place doesn't even open until How much is it going to cost? It can't be that bad.
Whoa, this is bad! This is bad! I can't wait for this mess to be over.
So we can get back to shooting my video.
Some lady just made me take a picture with her dog.
I hope you charged her $500 for it.
Because that's what we need to fix the window.
Dez, what are you doing? Leaving a trail of manges, croutons and fish sticks.
Everybody knows this is how you attract kangaroos.
No, wait, that's how you attract a llama.
Hang on.
The kangaroo's got your video camera, right? Isn't it synced to our computers? Yes! We can watch the live video feed.
And see where the kangaroo is.
Yeah.
Whoa! Run! Run! Whoa, look out! Man 2: Whoa! That's by the food court! Here I come, kangaroo! Guess who just solved all our problems? - You did? - Yep.
Man, Ally, how are you so good at this game? An hour from now, Austin is gonna perform a concert in the store.
I've pre-sold 100 tickets at six bucks apiece.
Here's 500 bucks.
That should be $600.
What? I needed a new purse to carry all the money in.
Well, this is great.
Now we can fix the window! Seriously? - Yep! Seven bucks apiece.
- You said six.
So what? I'm gonna get a new purse and not get new shoes to match? - I mean come on.
- Cute.
This is awesome! And I thought nobody knew who I was anymore.
Take that, dog food guy! Whoo! This is incredible! I can't believe all those people.
Bought tickets to see Austin perform.
Well-ll Uh-oh, That was a long "well.
" what did you do? Well-ll Sorry.
Everyone's actually coming.
To get their picture taken with the kangaroo.
Austin's more like the unannounced opening act.
What? If he finds out, it'll crush him.
You saw how excited he was.
Then I guess he can't find out.
You see the llama too, right? Oh, this is the best show I've ever seen! - What is it? - It's called.
"Dez gets his butt kicked by a kangaroo.
" Oh.
Ooh! Ouch! Oh, that is not a place you want a kangaroo to kick you.
Ooh.
What are you doing? I'm writing some new lyrics for Austin's song.
Since people are coming to see the kangaroo and not him, I wanna help Austin give the best performance he can.
You're not going to tell him about the kangaroo, are you? - Well-ll - Ally! No.
I'm I'm just torn because I hate lying to people, But I know how much it'll hurt Austin to know the truth.
I'm torn too.
I need Dez to get the kangaroo back here, But I never want this to end.
Ouch! That one's gonna leave a mark.
That one will leave a mark.
Oh.
oh, 'cause I know that I'll make it never put my head down turn it up and Hey, Ally.
Just practicing for the show.
There's a lot of people coming to see me.
Yeah, coming to see you only you, Not an animal from Australia.
Why would I say that? Here, I wrote some new lyrics.
I just want you to have the best show you can.
Since people aren't really coming to see you Perform a bad show.
Which you won't.
Gotta go! Wait.
I'm sorry about giving you a hard time about the song.
I was just nervous that maybe no one knew who I was anymore, But obviously that's not the case.
Definitely not the case.
Apology accepted.
Gotta go.
Finally I got the kangaroo.
That was not easy.
Now people can finally see who they came for.
You! Gotta go.
What's up, everybody?! Whoo! Excuse me, sir.
Thanks for coming out.
- Where's the kangaroo?! - Yeah.
Oh, we caught him.
He's upstairs.
Thanks for your concern.
He's all good.
All right, this is a new song.
It's called "a billion hits" and I hope you guys like it.
didn't go nowhere, never left, unh! you really thought that I was gone gone gone gone gone I heard you talking like I lost my swagger said I was over you, wrong wrong wrong wrong I'm always improving, always on the move and working on my flow to take it to the studio this is not a comeback, following my own path laying down the phat tracks I'm a music maniac I know that I'll make it never put my head down tur-turn it up now yeah, 'cause I don't have to fake it if I keep on working it a billion hits is what I'll get whoa oh oh oh that's what I'm gonna get whoa oh oh oh that's what I'm gonna get yeah, 'cause I know that I'll make it overload the Internet a billion hits is what I'll get.
Austin, Austin, Austin, Austin, Austin - This is so awesome.
- Oh, this is great.
See, this footage sick.
I can totally cut this together into a great live video.
For the new song and have it up on the website tonight.
- Awesome! - That's great! Oh, you really won all those people over.
They came for the kangaroo, but they stayed for the moon.
What do you mean? This is why you should not tell me secrets.
Um, uh, those people weren't exactly there to see you.
They were there to get their picture taken with the kangaroo.
So those people didn't know who I was? Uh, but they do now, and that's all that really matters.
Okay, I'm cool with that.
As long as you keep performing like that, There will always be Austin moon fans.
Thanks.
But as long as you keep writing songs like that, I'll always be an Ally Dawson fan.
- Thanks.
- But please don't make me wait.
Another month for a new song.
Oh, fine, read this for my book club.
And tell me what it's about.
I can wait a month.
Uh, guys.
Wait, the jacket it looks different.
Yeah, 'cause it shrunk and it is pink! No, that's not it.
Hey! Where's my jacket? It better be ready.
Mad dog's waiting, And mad dog hates to wait.
Here you go.
That will be $6 Or free.
Oh, my jacket! What did you do to my championship jacket? Yeah, I couldn't put my finger on it either.
- Whoa! - Mr.
Facepuncher? This is all my fault.
My friends were just trying to help me out, and if you're gonna punch.
Anyone in the face, it should probably be me.
Though I kind of need my face, so if you could punch me in the shoulder, The foot, the hip or even pull my hair - How about I punch you in all of the above? - Daddy, hurry up.
You know I hate waiting.
Hang on a sec, mad dog.
Daddy has a situation.
That's mad dog? Is that for me? It's beautiful.
I love it! You're the best daddy in the whole world ever! I knew you'd love it, Pumpkin.
No way! You're Austin moon! Can you autograph my jacket? Of course.
Oh.
- There you go.
- Thanks, Austin.
- No problem.
- Hey, aren't you the guy.
- That ate the 20-lb hamburger? - Why, yes I am! - I didn't ask for an autograph.
- Uh-oh.
Beat him up fast, daddy.
You know I hate waiting.
Ally, I'm home from the accordion conven Oh! Oh, why is there a kangarooey-pooey.
In my room? Hey.
No more! No! Stop! Stop! Down! Mad kangaroo attack! How many times are you going to watch that? Till it stops being funny.
Oh! Aw.