Crash Course (2022) s01e02 Episode Script

1
DLP stands for Distance Learning Program.
The city of Kota
is littered with institutes.
The students who come here
are spoilt for choice.
They get enrolled in an institute
and then to gain a competitive edge,
they end up using the course material
from two, three, or even four
different institutes.
However, if the students successfully
clear the IIT entrance exam,
each one of these institutes can
claim credit for the student's success
even if the institute
had a minuscule role to play.
This is precisely the situation
that I had to create
for three rank-holders
from Batra Institute.
Got it?
How long does it take
to answer the phone, Anil?
What happened, Mom?
Anil, I've mortgaged the house
and taken a loan to send you to Kota.
I'm paying 24% interest on the loan.
Do you have any idea how hard it is
for me to make ends meet?
I've put you up at the best hostel. Why?
All you need to do is to study
and you can't even do that properly!
You couldn't even clear
the institute exam.
How on earth will you clear the IIT exam?
One sandwich, please.
I'm sure you're hanging out with
your good-for-nothing friends!
Fooling around all day.
If you'd studied and made it to Section A,
I would've saved 75% on the fees!
Would it have killed you to do this?
What's up, bro?
Dude, this ranking system is full of shit.
You think it's shit
'cause you're a genius.
-I've had enough of your rubbish pranks.
-You're over-reacting
Really?!
I've understood your strategy.
Concentrate on your own studies,
but distract others
when they try to study.
"Let's go for a walk. Let's go out.
Let's play a game."
Do you see what your walk has led to?
If I continue hanging out with you,
I'll slip from Section C to D!
Go away. Just go away.
Go, sit with the others from Section A.
Of course, I will.
I have no interest in sitting with
a loser like you.
Go, sit with the others from Section C.
Coward!
Hello, Anil. How are you?
Hey, who is it?
Anil.
Anil.
I told him, "Let's go out."
But he started cribbing.
So, I said, "Okay, fuck it.
Why should I go alone?"
I have you to talk to.
I will talk to you. Big deal.
You and I, bro! Life-time!
Anil.
Anil.
I said I don't want to talk
This is the last image
captured by the CCTV camera
before the lights went out.
Have a look.
This is one valuable coin!
You better use it
to buy your return ticket to Khurja.
Sir? Sorry, sir. Please.
My father will kill me.
He has taken a loan to send me here.
Okay, no problem.
You couldn't have
possibly done this alone.
If you don't want to go home,
you better tell me the names
of everyone involved.
Go on, tell me.
Shot.
I've been observing you for some time.
Many buildings, so many hostels,
bookshops, and supermarkets as well.
Placement of teachers
in almost every institute
Any outsider would think
that you run this city!
No way, brother.
I'm just a small fish in the sea.
You're the one who runs the institute.
I've heard you've started pimping as well!
I'm sorry but aren't you poaching
students for R.J. these days?
Why haven't you ever worked for Batra?
Because I get
the maximum work from Jindal.
So
how does it feel to be
someone's pet dog, Binny?
I mean, I have scraps and leftovers too,
if you're interested.
I can throw some your way.
Want a new master?
Good boy!
Good boy!
Jump.
If you leave, we'll leave with you.
You haven't been expelled.
You should've just told him our names.
How many times do I need to explain?
There's so much administration
work to be done.
I need to look after so many things, man!
My life is just
I can't talk now, please
Sir, has any parcel come for me?
Do I look like the noticeboard?
If it arrives, I'll put it up on
the noticeboard!
Fine!
He is so irritating!
Sathya Srinivasan
-Scholar.
-Very scholar, sir!
There are a lot of mosquitoes
in my room and balcony.
Mosquitoes flying everywhere
They bite me here, sir.
Here and here too.
They bite me on my legs as well, sir!
A lot, sir!
-A lot.
-These shoes?
These are mine, sir.
Shoes and studies
very attached, sir.
I don't share with anyone.
-Are they yours?
-Yes, sir.
Get out.
Pack your things and get out!
I said, get out!
Sir
I have an offer.
Thanks a lot, Sathya.
You saved me.
But our friendship is dead.
Move to Sujoy's room tomorrow
or find some other loser.
Because now you've pissed me off.
How can you do this?
You saved my life just to stab me?!
No! Sathya!
Sath
You are a loser
but at least you're not a traitor.
I helped you
because you didn't rat us out.
Aviral, you loser. Do something!
You just stay hidden in every game.
Everyone has a unique strategy, bro.
Really? Is that why your player
still roaming around in underwear?
Pick up the gun quickly
and be a team player.
It's my birthday the day after tomorrow.
-Wow, we should party
-Dead!
What the hell!
This is cheating, Nikki.
You lied to your friend.
Everyone has a unique strategy!
By the way, I didn't lie.
Why didn't you tell us earlier?
I thought he'd know for sure.
Warning! Overload!
You didn't?
It's on Friendsbook, my D-O-B.
I had one silent admirer
even he has failed me.
Please listen to me, Nikki.
-Please
-Stop it.
Listen to me, Nikki.
Don't!
But I had planned a surprise for you.
Shit.
I'm so sorry. I had no clue.
Yeah, since you're the last one
to turn 18 among us,
we'd planned
a coming-of-age party for you.
Now you've ruined it!
I'm really sorry.
I had no idea
Warning!
-Rakesh, should I tell her?
-Yes, tell her.
Tell her about the plan.
It's a surprise, let's keep it that way.
Loser, there's no way Nikki will fall
for you because of a party.
We are boys, it's our duty
to swing at every ball thrown at us.
Whether it's a home run or not,
that's up to destiny.
Once you've planned this surprise party,
let me know.
Won't you help me?
Aren't you my bro?
Don't have the time.
I have to finish
the chapter on Probability.
You're such a bookworm!
-Yes!
-Damn!
Stop crying.
Behave like a man!
Namaste.
Have some sweets.
There's always a long queue
to meet with Mr. Binny Agarwal.
Finally, he gets the time to meet me.
Mr. Home Minister had called to say,
our meeting with Madam Chief Minister
will be fixed for next week.
Everything is falling into place.
Just join me
and look after R.J.'s expansion.
Whether I join or not, Mr. Jindal,
you can call me whenever you need me.
You've been saying this
for the past three years.
And I've always delivered!
Yes, except Ashutosh Kumar.
Binny, tell me
just tell me what you want.
I'll give you more than
you can ever desire.
You shouldn't miss
this golden opportunity.
You know my answer.
Oh, I've seen many answers change.
Think about it carefully.
But don't take too long
I might decide to prop
someone else in your place.
I don't beg you for work.
This pond that you're happily
swimming around in,
like a fish
Don't forget that this pond
belongs to Jindal.
Mr. Jindal, you might be a
godfather to many people,
but I'm not one of them.
I am a fish, yes.
But I'm a big one. A whale.
If I die, your whole pond
will be left rotting.
So, Aviral Bharti,
hanging out with sissies
and now behaving like one?
Hope there's still a little man
in you somewhere.
No, no, Suraj
How many people are
coming to the party?
Around 30-40 people.
We'll be there too, all dressed up.
Thanks, brother.
No "sorry" or "thank you"
among the Panthers.
Are girls coming to the party?
Yes, but they're friends.
Do we look like enemies?
Aviral is from our town.
Arrangements will be made.
Binny
What's the job?
Kota Samachar.
You have to meet
reporter Govind Nath.
I'll find him.
But he won't be able to live
in Kota after this.
-Binny
-Keep the cash ready.
But Binny, listen
Binny
Binny
Binny, you should put up a board outside,
so that we'd know which room you're in.
Sure, fucker.
Binny
Know what, you should take in
some student boarders,
that'd take care of the electricity bill!
Don't get smart with me.
You wanted to do more than
just hostel deals
and land-grabbing deals, right?
Yes.
Go, find Govind Nath.
Great.
Who is this for? Jindal?
Shashank Batra.
You've cursed him all your life,
you're working for him now?
Well, your wish is my command.
Drive!
Or I'll gut you!
If I do what you're asking me to,
I'll have to leave the state of Rajasthan,
not just this city.
This is more than you'll earn
in five years, Mr. Govind.
But you must do the job well.
You needn't worry about that.
I have enough ammunition.
See this.
Poster of a new film.
What could be the title?
In the Garden with the Warden.
No, Mr. and Mrs. Sathya.
Sathya's Gruesome Murder.
Good one!
-Sir.
-Sir!
Get a garland for sir.
Please sit, sir.
-Sir, please have a seat!
-Come here.
Come on, tell us what you've done.
Idiots
I told you, I had to sell my body!
-"Sell my body!"
-"Body"!
Give me your hand.
See same pose.
-Let's go, idiot.
-We're getting late.
It's a super joke!
Nikki!
Nikki!
Nikki!
Nikki!
Nikki!
Why are you standing outside?
What the fuck is this?
A selfie spot!
Selfie spot!
It's not funny!
Suraj has organized the party.
And don't worry,
everyone is safe and sober.
Careful, bro.
-Happy birthday, dear Sunita.
-Happy birthday.
Sober, my foot!
Nikki, come on!
DJ, change the music.
-Hi, Nikki
-Nikki!
-Happy birthday!
-Happy birthday, Nikki.
That was neat vodka!
It quenched my thirst.
You're damn cool.
I was never uncool, Aviral.
Take it easy.
Didn't it taste bitter?
I like bitter stuff, you know.
That's why I put up with you.
Is that water?
It's vodka.
-Give me vodka.
-Are you crazy?
-Give it.
-Are you crazy?
-Give it.
-Hey, no!
-Come with me! I'll get you some.
-Hey!
-It's vodka!
-Just give me some, man!
Hope you're happy, Nikki.
Dude, you're all heart, Aviral.
All heart.
Not bad.
Could be better though.
Happy birthday, Nikki!
I haven't seen you before.
So?
You know everyone
and everything in Kota, is it?
Not like that.
But in this hellhole,
I know of a beautiful place.
Want to see paradise?
Sounds like you use that line quite often.
I actually really like Kota.
Kota?
Are you okay?
I mean
I'll tell you someday.
"Someday"? That means we'll meet again?
If you play your cards right.
I find closed spaces claustrophobic.
Can we go somewhere else?
But we have the open sky here.
I said
"Play your cards right."
Right.
-Shanaya, you bitch.
-Nikki!
I've been looking for you.
Where have you been?
Come on! It's my birthday
and you have to dance.
Let's go
Go! Let's go!
Come on!
Vidhi
Happy birthday!
The vibe is correct, right?
The "vibe" was correct with Simran,
Sanjana, and Arpita as well.
Were you always like this,
or have you done a course
on being an asshole?
You must've planned
for the future already
with Shanaya.
Stop blushing, you fucker.
Go inside.
Go on.
I'll be back soon.
-Look where you're going, asshole.
-Sorry, bro.
Shove your sorry up your ass.
-What happened?
-Why are you cussing?
Can't you talk nicely?
I'll cuss all I want!
What will you do about it?
-Rascal!
-Hit him.
Are you a man of few words,
or is your Hindi weak?
Both.
You know, you aren't like
the other engineering
losers
Losers.
You're not like them.
You're different.
Good different or bad different?
Good different.
I mean
You're not like Velcro.
You know, Velcro like
It sticks with such ease
but to separate, you have to
rip it apart.
Anyway, what are you doing in Kota?
I want to start a business
selling fried Kota snacks.
I see.
Suraj, don't! Let him go, Suraj.
Not the knife! Wait!
Two minutes, please.
What the hell are you doing?
-He has organized the party.
-Tell him to shove it up his ass.
Tell your bouncer to get out of my way.
I won't let them go in now.
-What are you doing, Rakesh?
-You're their leader, right?
Antara, this is our business,
please don't interfere.
Your business? Is that why
you're pulling out a knife?
You should be ashamed of yourself!
You've come here to study.
Why are you picking a fight?
Have you lost your mind?
Suraj
This is the vegetarian biryani.
This is non-vegetarian biryani.
-And this is the yogurt.
-Thank you, ma'am.
-Are you a vegetarian or a non-vegetarian?
-Vegetarian.
Dinner is ready.
Return the utensils later.
Sorry about what happened downstairs.
Want more?
Is there some vodka?
Vidhi, do you have any vodka?
Can you give me a drink?
You've had enough to drink.
-Come and eat dinner.
-I've had enough?
Just get me one vodka. One glass!
-Eat this, don't be crazy.
-Vodka!
Eat.
I am not crazy.
Everything is unwinding.
Vidhi, this stress of
becoming an IIT topper
is unwinding now.
Do you know that what's unwound
cannot be wound again?
Vidhi, my friend.
Can I have one drink?
One small vodka?
300 kisses to whoever invented vodka!
-Make it 500 kisses!
-I did.
-You did?
-Yeah. Now eat.
You invented vodka, Vidhi.
-Thank you, Vidhi!
-Come on.
So, you want to be a gamer?
Game developer, worldwide.
So, this long story,
IIT Bombay, etc, etc
Just get straight to the point.
Should I get straight to the point?
Let's go.
-Madame, please.
-Okay.
Where do you stay?
Shah Hostel.
Get in, I'll drop you.
Lift your hand.
You know, I've always wanted
my first kiss to be special.
Like, special person, special place.
Special person: Sathya Srinivasan.
And special place: This auto.
80% of the girls in Kota
have their first kiss inside this auto!
I mean, that's so boring.
And these guys get a show out of it.
It's just these guys watching us
Not like Ratanraj Jindal
is watching us!
Now we're talking!
Not a bad idea.
You like challenges, right?
Can you kiss me in front of
Ratanraj Jindal?
Tell me, Mr. Cool Gamer.
Ratanraj Jindal?
Am I crazy?
"Am I crazy?"
I'm not joking.
Thank you.
Bye.
Bye.
It's very tough to lose your young son.
I can't lessen your grief,
but I do understand
You're lying.
No one understands what
we've been through.
What's the point of blaming others?
It's our fault too.
We just didn't realize
how sad our son was.
Other people have met us too,
in the past,
made some fake promises
Nobody helped.
I have a three-year-old daughter.
And for her sake,
I want to clear my conscience.
When she grows up,
she'll at least have something
that'll make her proud of her father.
Sir, I was solving the qualifier
test paper once again.
I had a problem with wave optics
and thermodynamics.
Let me see.
Sir, question numbers two and six.
The answer to question number two is C.
And the answer to question
number six is A.
Okay?
But shouldn't this be 0.94, sir?
This is just
the Principle of Superposition, Vidhi.
Sir, can you please elaborate?
Because I usually get confused with the
applications of these laws of reflection.
Remember, Vidhi.
College now, knowledge later.
Learn the laws here and learn
their applications later, at IIT.
What will they teach you otherwise?
Sir, can you please take a look?
Because when I try to solve it,
I get a different answer.
L.C. sir?
Hello, sir.
Bless you!
Did you bring this for me
from your village?
Yes, sir.
Your buffalo was sick
a few days ago, right?
Yes, sir.
I know a Bengali Baba.
He'll heal her in no time!
I don't care whether
you eat it or not,
just get your share
of the sweets, please.
Why are you looking at me
like I am crazy?
Hungry children will curse you!
I am cursed.
Vidhi Gupta is about to flunk
in Physics, T. P.
Listen, you're in Section A
at R.J., Vidhi.
What more do you want?
I've always been 1st!
I've never been in second place.
I know I'm not doing my best.
I can do better.
Ma'am, one bowl, please.
Here shove these down your gullet.
Bro, not me.
I have five assignments to complete.
-No! No!
-I'm not taking this responsibility
-Uncle!
-Yes?
A packet of tea powder,
a pack of sanitary pads,
and two scoops of ice cream.
Okay.
I want to be among the Top 10
in All India Ranks
not Rank 43
in one section of one institute.
Here you go.
He's
Him?
The Wizard!
Here you go.
Okay, alright.
Good morning, guys.
Good morning, sir.
Nice! What a great turnout!
Yes, sir.
Okay.
-Do you like this song?
-Yes, sir.
Yeah?
-Come on.
-Yes, sir.
Sound
is often portrayed as a sine waveform
because it is easier to illustrate.
But it is actually
-a longitudinal compression wave.
-Compression wave.
Does anyone know
what a sine waveform is?
No, sir.
-What it looks like? No idea?
-No, sir.
-Tell me when you see it, okay?
-Yes, sir.
-Do you see anything?
-Yes.
-Is there any movement?
-Yes, there is.
What's happening?
Okay, not bad.
The Physics professor
can dance a little, right?
There we go, yeah.
Can anyone whistle?
-Sir, I can.
-Whistling!
You can?
So, at the count of three.
One
two
three!
And blackout!
Okay, just to see
if all of us are on the same page,
the answer to question number four.
Hurry up.
A. K. sir!
-Yes?
-Sir, 2πr.
Anyone else?
Sir, 0 or 1, because
it can be 2π
Where's the voice coming from?
I can't see.
Stand up.
Sir, 0 or 1, because it can be
2πr or 2πr/3.
Okay, correct.
Guys, question number three.
Sir, it will be two centimeters.
Close, but the answer is one centimeter.
Spend more time with the question,
so that you reach the answer.
Be patient with it.
-One centimeter.
-Any doubts?
Underline it,
whatever your doubts are.
During displacement, detector detects
maximum intensity, ten times.
Make a note of that.
And finally
Where were you?!
I've been calling you!
-Why aren't you answering your phone?
-My phone was switched off.
How did you like the lecture?
Handsome, isn't he?
He's such a good teacher.
Even I want to attend his classes.
But you can't.
He's the ONLY trump card at Batra's!
-How will you study at R.J.?
-The form
-But the form
-Sir! A. K. sir!
-All your doubts will be cleared.
-Sir, in thermodynamics
I'm going to have a seminar.
Don't worry about it.
I'll answer all these.
-Tejal Patel?
-Yes, sir?
-The lecture?
-I'll be right there, sir.
He knows me by my name!
You're such a bitch.
Hi, sir. I'm Vidhi Gupta.
Sir, I came for your open lecture.
I was wearing a peach-colored dress, sir.
And you were wearing a blue shirt,
sleeves rolled up.
You demonstrated the sound wave.
I don't meet students at home.
May I have a glass of water, sir?
-Here you go.
-Thank you.
Nice.
You know, I remember you.
You're the girl too eager to answer and
Well, it seems like
you're persistent as well.
Sorry. So sorry, sir.
No, it's okay. You actually
remind me of someone.
Sir, I need you to teach me.
Sir, I'm struggling with a few topics.
Which institute do you go to?
Sir, R.J. Institute.
Mr. Lalchand he's a fine teacher.
I'm sure he can help you.
Sir, please
What rank do you think you'll get
in the IIT entrance exam?
Sir, currently, I am ranked 43 in R.J.
Forty-three?
That's not bad.
-Why do you need me?
-But I want to be the best, sir.
I want to be among the Top 10 in India.
Please, sir.
Get permission from R.J. Institute,
I'll teach you.
Thank you, sir.
Thank you.
For tomorrow's front page.
Is Wadia sir okay with this?
What?
Has Wadia sir ever invited you
to his house for drinks?
No, sir.
Know your limits
and do what you're told.
What? Where are we going?
What the
Sathya you're impossible!
I mean
special person
special place.
You challenged me
and I accepted it.
You know what,
this time you played your cards right.