Little Mosque on the Prairie (2007) s01e02 Episode Script

What is this? Baber, a barrier in our mosque? No way! The women already pray behind the men, isn't that enought? Hockey boards? I've got a deal from the old rink.
From my eye here, nothing separates men from women like hockey in Canada.
You're not gonna get away with this.
Leave that alone! You stop that! Pull! Common! Two minutes for interference! Amaar, he's the one who's interferring.
The grand mosque in Mecca doesn't have a barrier.
She's interferring, a barrier is essential.
You're both interferring, I'm the imam, I decide.
Of course Take it down! Absolutely not! Women distract men from their prayers.
That is such a lame excuse! You see, women are a distraction.
I wasn't distracted.
Baber admit it, because you're wrong! What do you mean you weren't distracted? Allright boys and girls, this is a contentious issue.
Baber, you can't just decide this on your own.
Finally, an enlightened male voice running our mosque.
Don't listen to this feminist, she is trying to distract you.
Let me weight both sides and get back to the congregation.
Great, so help me take this down.
Nah, until I make my decision, the barrier stays.
Three seconds of male enlightenment, that's a new record.
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Exact change, I see.
Fatima, sweetheart, I tip for the look-it, not the cook-it, would it kill you muslims girls to show a little cleavage now and then? Would it kill you if I hit you with a cleaver? Would you talk like that on your radio show? You bet your burka darling, controversy pays.
Well ladies, the men are at it again.
Baber is putting a barrier in the mosque.
That man seriously needs a sex life.
The barrier gives women privacy too.
So put the men behind the barrier.
Please, you're talking like a fanatic.
Oh, finally I fit in.
This is not the place to discuss this.
So, I was right huh? Islam is a sexist religion.
Only when it's ran by men.
Listen, why don't you come on the show this afternoon and talk it up, always happy to champion a good look and underdog huh ? She can't It is forbidden For women to speak on the radio It is ? It's in the Quran.
Oh right, it is.
Chapter 115, verse 42 it's Figures well, you know where to find me, radio 6.
60 CFRZ You waffler ! What are you thinking? Dad, I need to talk to you about something important.
Real important or teenage important? - Our school's having a - No dances! I got my degree without once having to shake my boogie! It's bootie, and it's not a dance, it's a 10K run, they're raising money for the new hockey rink, raising money for charity, that's very islamic right? I'll be with all my friends who are all girls.
Surrounded by boys.
What will you be wearing to this social event? I'll wear something appropriate, please can I go? Please.
Thank you, I love you! I know.
Yasir's office, now! Yasir, you are a contractor, we need your help installing a barrier.
Znuvit Babariah ? Get your head out of your business for two minutes and think like a muslim! A barrier for the pray hall.
Guys, the men and women have been praying together in my basement for years.
Now that you got us a proper mosque, in a church mind you, we need to set a proper example, go talk to Amaar.
Leave me out of this, I can't imagine Amaar wants a barrier, or the majority of the women for that matter.
Well the majority of the men do want a barrier and without our substantial financial contributions, the mosque will close, and so does your free office space! Look at that, I have a hole in my schedule right now! Allah be praised.
Lord of all mankind For centuries, men as Friday, try saying people instead of man in your sermon, it's controversial.
So, you've seen the barrier.
Amaar, make this easy on yourself, keep the barrier.
Or Baber will stage a mutiny.
It has no theological validity.
Forget theology, it's a scientific fact that men get distracted with women around.
But the women pray behind the men.
Even when a women is behind the man, he knows she's there.
Darling, I didn't hear you come in.
Always such a pleasure to see the mayor.
Sorry for distracting you.
Believe me, you're a welcome distraction.
Amaar, I'd love to get your congregation support for the new hockey rink.
It's a wonderful idea.
Well the mayor would like to speak after prayers on Friday.
You're always welcome.
Friday, this Friday? Thee should notice my put up against the wall.
Do you follow Amaar, I don't want the mayor to be bored.
Is there a problem Yasir? No problem, ladies.
We'll see you on Friday.
Trust me Brendie, it's like war.
You start off with shock and awe and then you walk your way to a reasonable compromise.
I know what I'm doing.
So? Starfallah, I can see the belly button.
You look like a protestant! Don't you mean prostitute? No I meant protestant! Have your bosom grown ? Now you look like a rapper.
I'm totally covered.
It is modestly modest, but, you don't have to cover your hair, not until you start your menses.
Dad, don't gross me out.
So, we're good ? Too much attention on your bottom.
They're the only ones I have.
I'll buy you something new, go change ! Dad, I can't believe you're shoting with Baber.
You see, men get distracted by women, it's the same everywhere.
Well maybe men can wear those cones that they put on dogs so they can't lick themselves.
That's right.
If you were men, you would understand how complicated this is.
No if I was a man, I wouldn't make it this complicated.
That's right.
Ok, I have to get to the clinic.
But once I'm gone, just imagine that after everything mom says, I am saying "that's right".
- Bye sweetie.
- See you later.
Love you Rayyan has gone, we have, the house to ourselves.
We can't have a barrier, no you have to convince Amaar to take it down, use your charm.
Yes, why waste it on Amaar ? Let's continue this discussion upstairs.
- You will talk to Amaar, - Yes And you'll do it before the mayor comes to the mosque on Friday.
Ooh, let's not rock the boat.
Look, when you run a contracting business, you tend to have to deal with men.
Wives have a lot of influence when it comes to home-running too darling.
But it's men who write the checks.
Do you have any idea how insulting this barrier is to me? Rayyan's gone out, we don't have to talk muslim politics 24 hours a day.
You're not going to do this for me, are you? No, but don't take it personally.
You're right, let's stick to the facts, barriers between men and women are a great idea.
I'm so glad that you see it this way.
Yeah I do, and you know what makes a wonderful barrier? Our bedroom door.
Before we go, I'd like to introduce a very special guest, mayor Popowitz.
Hi sweetie, hi everybody.
Good afternoon, could you take these? Careful it's straps.
I hope the women back there can hear me because I'm sure we all agree that women, are the heart of any community.
Can you hear me ladies? Ok, close enough.
The run for the rink is this weekend.
I hope many of you will come out.
We're looking for contributions, I've asked Yasir to pass around a box, thank you Yasir.
I hope the women get a chance to contribute because of course, the rink is for them as well, isn't it? Sorry it's just a little bit hard to contribute when we're in the penalty box.
Oh great Now when are the muslim women of Mercy gonna be treated with the same respect as our local girls? Fred Topper standing up for oppressed women? I think he's standing up for oppressed boobs.
Now, as Reagan said to Gorbie, I say to that mosque, tear down that wall.
I hate to admit it but for once, I agree with that jerk.
Your scarf is on too tight.
Oh darling Thank you.
You're welcome.
I'm delighted to see such a turnout, vigorous debate is the lifeblood of our community.
Lifeblood, I think we might need a transfusion here.
This is ridiculous, I want the barrier, I don't want a bunch of men luring at me when I pray.
And I don't want you women distracted by my bottom.
Trust me, no one is looking at your bottom.
I've prepared a few arguments.
Now, in the time of the prophet Thank you for that Rayyan, let's vote.
I haven't said anything yet.
Everyone knows what you think.
Oh really, so what am I thinking right now? Who cares what you're thinking? I have the right to speak, Islam is a democracy.
Exactly, so kindly shut up so we can vote.
Ok, it won't even be a fair vote, the men are just going to bully their wives and decide without them.
- Not in my house.
- Our house You see, if you have not been shouting your mouth off in my cafe, the whole town would not be in an uproar.
Come on now, the ravings of one right-winged radio hoax can hardly be called an uproar.
Opressed muslims, women of the world, cut your chains and be free! Opressed muslims, women of the world, cut your chains and be free! Sisters, be brave, stand up to the prairie talibans.
This isn't helping anyone.
I put fires out for a living, watch this.
Listen, just between you and me, I am totally on your side ok ? Well you see that culturally diverse women of color ? Well she supports the barrier.
Really? So do you think that it is our place as privileged white people to tell her how to worship? Well, uh, I mean we didn't mean to offend anyone.
Can you come back later if I need you? - Sure - Ok, thank you so much.
Let's move it up.
Like fishing in a barrel.
I hope you didn't upset them, some of those women are good customers.
What did you say to them ? That you were going to take down the barrier.
That's not damage control, that's lying.
Don't make me a liar.
You are not looking well.
This whole business is keeping me up all night.
Yasir, I'm delighted to see you taking such an interest in your faith.
I've never prayed so much in my life! Oh my god I need your help, Layla got her period.
Oh, then you need to get her some pants.
Forget that nonsense, she has to cover her head.
Then talk to her.
I can't, she doesn't know.
She doesn't know she has her period? Oh that child needs a mother.
No, she doesn't know I know.
Ah, she's kepted from you because she doesn't want to wear the scarf.
It's that western school system, filling her head with thinking! Please a scarf! Calm down! Hurry, it's so embarrassing! It's part of being a woman It's embarrassing me! You women, all you think is yourself! What a baby.
So, how goes the great barrier grief.
My congregation's coming appart of the scenes.
I'm in the middle again, any words of wisdom? No not really, no.
But I had a did have choir master once I caught smoking pot.
What did you do? John 8.
7: he among you who has not sinned, cast the first stone.
Or in this case: he among you who has not got stoned, cast the first sin.
So you didn't fire him? Not until I accidentedly ate a couple of his hash brownies at the choir picnic.
I guess that ended his career.
No, now he's working for the united church.
This is fantastic, $1.
000 from our goal.
- Great.
- What is with you? You've been like this all week.
Did you read Lisa's strada when you were at the university? Is that the one where the son kills his mother? No, I think that that one Oh, Lisa's Strada, it's the one with that women in Greece try to stop the men from going to war by witholding sex.
Yep, that's the one.
I don't remember, did the husband find the cave? - Hello mayor.
- Hello.
The barrier's down, all down.
Sarah, you look so tired I do? I think you better go home and lie down.
Lie down? Oh yes, I will.
Yes, I am, we will.
Yes, thank you.
You're welcome.
Is everything ok at school? Does all I care wether I pray at school or home were no one can stare at me? Those kids are teasing you again I They don't tease me.
So what's the problem? They don't say anything, they just stand there and pretend like nothing's going on.
I couldn't feel more of a freak, if I tried.
I know it's not easy, I dont think they could wear these sacred clothe either.
Oh you mean people haven't started to run up to their chest up to the bold look you have ? Oh so now I look sy-sex? Look, there's my friend, I'll be right back.
Down put it down, over there, down.
Excuse me, Nayah what's happening? Baber's putting the barrier back up.
Oh really, well let me help him.
Get off there you crazy lady.
No ! You're not supposed to touch me.
Please, forgive me sister Rayyan.
I totally forgot myself.
Of course.
- It will never happen again.
- Good.
Give me that piece of wood so I can push her off! Nayah, help me! I've got your back girlfriend.
Liar.
I took it down I swear I took it down.
- What is he doing? - Pick out that board! Use your muscles, together we can move ten women at a time.
Where is your dignity? Hey, live my daughter alone.
Clear the boards, I've made a decision.
- Excellent.
- Finally.
Everybody sit.
Everyone, my decision is this.
The barrier stays.
Now I'm not finished.
It also goes.
Are you taking crack ? I have opened the book of al buhari, and found the story of the king Suliman.
He settled a custody battle between two mothers by offering to cut a baby in half.
What baby, we don't have a baby.
Yeah but Suliman didn't do it Amaar, the women worked it out.
Exactly.
The barrier stays as it is, half up.
Those who want it, can pray behind it.
Those that don't have the other side of the room to pray without it.
- Rayyan ? - I hate it.
- Baber ? - It's terrible.
The perfect muslim solution, nobody's happy.
You can come back to our bedroom now.
Thank god.
But only on Mondays and Wednesdays.
Saturdays good.
Sundays? The muslims need a day of rest.
She's quite a young woman now.
Yes she is.
Odd, she's not wearing the scarf.
There's always next month.
Allright Mercy, let's run for the rink.
Well, it's relief the war in the mosque is over.
Oh you're telling me brother Amaar, harmony between the sexes is better for everyone.
You think I handled it ok? You're doing a great job.
Thanks.
Gross, guys get a room.
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