Love and Marriage (2013) s01e02 Episode Script
Episode 2
1 I've told your dad I'm leaving him.
What? I don't want to live in that house anymore.
Or with Ken.
I retired today.
Pass us that wrench will you? I'll miss you, er, Mrs Paradise.
It's a line.
That means I'm ovulating, Charlie.
We've gotta do it now.
Don't tell Sarah but I'm about 600 short for Nathan's trip to France.
Your mum used to draw.
She'd draw me meadows full of wild flowers.
Will you help me find my mum, Grandpa Frank? I'm not going to be a daughter, or a wife, or a mum anymore.
I'm going.
: Where are you going? Rowan's.
I wish I had your face.
Well, you haven't, so tell Debbie what you want.
I don't know what I want.
She has a lovely round face, Debbie, but she doesn't need anything to exaggerate it.
And she needs a colour.
I like being grey.
Don't listen to her when she says that.
It's a desperate lie and she's been peddling it for years.
I don't want to go over the top.
When's that ever happened? My kids'll think I'm mutton dressed as lamb.
Mutton dressed as lamb still looks like lamb - and that's half the battle.
It's the entire war.
From the horse's mouth.
Heather will think I'm absurd.
It's not about your kids now, Paul.
They're grown up.
The first thing to remember about a fire extinguisher is that it is not a toy.
It might look big and red and full of fun, but you must fight the urge to blast your family as they sit down to Sunday dinner cos you could take someone's eye out.
Now, when I find myself approaching a fire extinguisher, I always tell myself to be serious, to be responsible.
Bloody hell! Who took the safety pin out of that?! Do you think I'm the only woman that has ever found my Kevin attractive? No, no, there was a blind girl at school he went out with for a while.
She had terrible eyesight.
She had to wear an eye patch, didn't she Martin? What, Kev's girlfriend? Yeah.
Aw! He's not like your Charlie though, is he? Puts on that uniform, women hurl cats up trees hoping he'll come round and rescue them.
Nice! When you actually find 'the one', you feel so lucky.
Yeah, I'm the lucky one.
Because some people in the world never have our kind of luck, and they make do, or they don't do and every day I have to pinch myself that someone like Charlie could ever fall in love with me.
But you're fantastic.
Aw, we know that.
But some people think, because I'm a little bit older, four or five years, actually, that I'm some kind of mother figure.
Which is nice.
Get your feet off the coffee table.
I'm joking! I'm joking! No, actually, get your feet off.
A smoke alarm is a fireman's best friend.
90 percent of deaths in house fires are caused by smoke inhalation, so the correct installation of smoke alarms in your house are gonna save the lives of the people that you love the most.
Your children.
Louise? Heather McCallister.
Do you remember, I danced in the in the Flamenco competition at the sports centre last September.
Yeah, hi.
I thought you danced really well.
Thank you.
Are you doing the competition at the Guildhall this Friday? You? I'll be there.
This bloke is gorgeous, isn't he? He's my husband.
Yeah, but seriously.
No, seriously.
He's not your Flamenco partner, is he? No he's not my Flamenco partner, he's my husband.
I've got leaflets here on where best to site the alarms, and we're doing a community initiative where we're offering free home visits to install the devices.
Is it Carl you dance with? Is he your husband? No, Carl's as camp as a row of tents.
No, I'm divorced.
Good luck Friday, yeah? Thank you.
Jealousy's odd, isn't it? It's like you but it isn't you.
It's like that thing in Alien that just bursts out your stomach and looks around for a bit, snarling.
Yeah, and everyone can see it.
Exactly! You're having a perfectly pleasant breakfast with all the other astronauts and suddenly it's boosh! Family meeting, please.
Family meeting.
Before you leave, will all members of the Paradise family please join me here at fire tender two.
Heather! What is it? Mum and Dad.
How will we get them back together? Have any of you talked to your mum since your grandad's funeral? She turned her mobile off.
I rang Auntie Rowan's but she wouldn't come to the phone.
Why is Mum ruining our lives? Put the microphone down.
Are you cooking for your Dad? Yeah.
But he's fixing his cars and going down the pub.
He hasn't mentioned her once.
Why are we trying to fix things? Why don't we just let them - ? I've got a plan, so shut up.
Don't talk to her like that.
We have to make sure they're coming to Joseph's birthday.
Are they coming, Martin? Yeah, they should be.
Did you enjoy your lovely little chat? Who with? Who with? She said she danced Flamenco with you.
And did she book in to have her alarms installed? Yes.
I hope you're not gonna to do it.
Not if you don't want me to, no.
Did she tell you she's divorced? What? What? Can we not turn this into the Jeremy Kyle show! We've got one estranged couple in the family.
I can't cope with two.
We've got to come up with a plan! You said you had.
OK, yeah.
I saw this work once in a Quentin Tarantino movie.
I tell Dad that Mum's missing him.
H, you tell Mum the same.
They'll both think the other's given in first and before you know it they'll be in Las Vegas renewing their vowels.
Vows.
Which Tarantino movie's this? Let it go.
Is your mum definitely coming to the party? Of course! She's never missed one of her grandchildren's birthdays! Turn it off! Is it something that will kill her? Turn it off! Pretty woman, walking down the street Pretty woman, the kind I like to meet Pretty woman I don't believe you, you're not the truth Did I buy Joseph a space hopper last year? Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh.
Have you turned into a monkey? You'd look fantastic in that! No, Rowan, I wouldn't, I'd look like you.
You've never let me shop for you, have you? If I'd done your shopping for your entire adult life you wouldn't be in the state you're in now! Oi! In your anorak with yoghurt down the front, and your casual trousers that would disgrace a French lesbian.
Code red! Code red! Look! Bloody hell, run for it! What is it? Just run for it, leave the shopping.
What is it? Quick, it's Tommy's wife! Quick! We've got these signals, a kind of code for the kept woman.
Code Blue is he's free all weekend.
Hang on, it's gonna to be a bumpy ride.
Well, it is.
That's what it amounts to.
Green is I'm out to pasture.
I'm unable to see you.
And red is 'Panic! The wife's around!' And you should panic, the things she's said about you.
I think in another life she may have had bunny-boiler tendencies.
I'm sure she's a very nice woman.
Arms good.
Much improved.
Rhythm! Rhythm! Look at me.
Heather! I am looking at you.
No! Look at me with red-hot desire.
I wanna see lust in every part of your body, popping out of your fleece.
Ashley! I'm a married woman, you can't talk to me like that.
Ashley is the marketing manager of the club, and he's the one who got me into Flamenco.
And he dresses up as the club mascot on match days.
Sky Blue Sam.
And occasionally he'll combine both his passions and Sam will do a bit of Flamenco.
on the touchline, in honour of the Spanish left back.
Oh, he's lovely, though, isn't he? I was in the dentist once.
Only once? No, but it was a few years ago, and there's an article in a magazine that haunts me.
About teeth? No.
No.
They'd taken pictures of ten couples on their wedding day, cut the photos down the middle, gave the bride photos to 100 men, and the grooms to 100 women, and asked them who they thought the most attractive.
It ranked them one to ten, and the couples completely matched up.
The tens had married the tens and the ones had got stuck with each other.
Oh! I think I'd be a four.
I think Charlie'd be a nine.
And I think I'm a six.
Maybe six and half when I wear that Monsoon trouser suit.
Heather, you are What? You are a very handsome woman.
What did I say? You say the word handsome to a woman, it means you think she looks like a horse! Then I meant 'stunning'.
I-I meant 'surprisingly attractive'.
You and Charlie are the most in love couple I've ever met.
I can't imagine a couple moremore perfect for each other than you two.
Ho, ho, senorita! If I turn the lights out I can get my arm positions right in the window.
It's fine.
I often dress up myself, turn the lights out, when you're out the flat.
Turn them out, come on, give it a go.
No.
Please! No.
Please dance with me Charlie.
Just once.
Come on! All right, all right.
Right All right.
What do I do? Right, stand like this and your arms like this.
Mm-hm.
And think Spanish.
Right.
I'm thinking about paella.
Now do this.
Aargh! My nose! Are you all right? I'll never be able to play the kazoo again! Oh! Heather? Why not? OK.
Let me get out of this dress.
No the dress is great.
Keep the dress on.
Why? No reason.
Cos you can imagine I'm someone else? Louise 'Little Tits' Anderson, maybe? After she's won the cup on Friday? Heather What? Gangnam Style Hi! Where is he? Where's my Joey? Happy Birthday, sweetness.
Hey, what do you say Joe? Can I open them? No, you say 'thank you'.
Hiya, Dad.
You all right? When's Nanny coming with my present, Grandpa? Joe! Don't know, love.
We've got a trampoline! We've got a trampoline! It's not up yet.
Is Charlie here? No.
He isn't? No.
Hiya! How long have you been dancing? Oh, umabout five years.
Have you ever thought about taking it up? No, it's not my thing.
I like my sport, I like doing my radio show, I like my job.
There's not a inner Spaniard inside you bursting to get out? Well there is, but he wants to play for Barcelona, not prance around with a pair of maracas.
You should definitely be dancing.
Is it the second one on the landing? Yeah.
There's a beer in the fridge if you want one? Er, aye, thanks.
Did you tell Mum what we planned? She isn't answering her phone.
I'll talk to her here.
Kev told Dad she was missing him.
He didn't say anything.
I said she was thinking of shooting herself.
That's not true nor helpful.
Why sugar-coat the thing? Auntie Heather, our trampoline's up.
Can we go on it now? What did Dad say? 'Pass me the spanner.
' Put the trampoline up.
Look! Do you think she'll come? Look at my present! Don't answer the phone, this is serious.
It's Mum.
Oh, my God! Kids out, now! It's Mum on the phone! Mum? Is he there? Yeah, Dad's here.
And he's missing you terribly, Mum.
He's all over the place.
He's bought a trampoline and he's been putting it up for the kids.
I got the trampoline.
Sorry, Kev got that.
We got that?! How much was it? It was a cheap one.
But safe.
Are you gonna come over, Mum? Did he get Joseph a present? Did Dad get a present? Yeah, he got him a Roald Dahl book.
Look, we're all here, Mum.
Are you gonna come over? Dad said he'd love to talk to you.
Give Joe my love.
I can always tell when Heather's lying.
She touches her nose.
You can tell that on the phone? He just assumes I would get the present.
Like I've got every present for the last 40 years.
We should still go to the party.
Why? Cos Joseph will be upset.
It's good you've done this, Paul.
Life will get better for you now you've left him.
Now I've left my husband? You've left a world of pain, not a man - and it's been difficult to watch you down the years.
This is the first time we're going to get drunk together for 40 years.
So take your jacket off and let's find a Tom Hanks movie and stare at his buttocks.
Hey, Nathan, give us a spin.
What's wrong with you, you moody sod? You all right? I'm off the rugby tour to France.
What? They say Dad hasn't paid.
Kevin, you said you'd written a cheque.
I did.
You haven't paid, Dad.
Nathan I wrote the cheque, I promise.
So why am I off the tour? It must have bounced, but I still wrote it.
It'll be fine Sarah.
How? Because I promised him he'd go and he'll go.
Why the black look? How much was that trampoline? Did you see that black look? Aaaaah! Why's no-one missing Grandpa Frank? They are, Scarlett.
It's the first birthday any of us have ever had where he's not scoffed all the best sandwiches and no-one's mentioned him.
It's like no-one mentions my mum.
Do people just forget them? Well, this week it's Joe's birthday, and last week your Auntie Pauline had a barney with your Uncle Ken.
Life goes on, it doesn't mean that people that used to be here aren't missed.
Mm? When are you going to talk to Mum? Dad? She'll be back.
You don't know that! Don't you think maybe you should do something to show her how much she means to you? I don't do flowers.
Well, what do you do? Because she's not psychic.
A woman needs to be shown how much she's loved, Dad.
That she's thought of.
Hiya.
Where've you been? The shift ran on.
Why didn't you text? I did, didn't I? No.
I thought you'd go straight to the radio station.
No, I've got half an hour.
Come on, Charlie, five a side, man? Kev, you know that money that went missing from the Rugby Club the night of the quiz? Yeah.
Gary said that some prat has returned it in an envelope with 'sorry' written in letters cut out of a newspaper.
Sounds like somebody's been watching too many films.
Yeah, crap films.
Charlie! Charlie! Ahhhhhhhhhh! In all your years, Paulie-Paul, do you think Kinetic Ken ever's strayed? No.
Are you sure? Well, he fancied a barmaid down the Hare and Squirrel for a couple of years.
I used to lie awakelistening to him talking about her in his sleep.
And he'd say 'Ruth.
Get off!' And have you strayed? When would I have the time? But you're free.
Have you done this because you've seen someone? No, no.
But there might be someone.
Whom? He gave me a poem.
Oh! He gave you a poem?! Yeah.
And he's a widower.
His name is Peter Bachman.
Bachman! He's a teacher.
And he gave me a book when I retired.
With his number in it.
The randy goat! No.
Oh, yes! Oh, yes! Randy barman! We're gonna get some more wine.
And we're gonna get this poetry book with the secret number.
I'm not ringing him up.
We most certainly are! No! Hey, hey! A car just pulled up in the drive.
Well, it won't be Tommy.
The bunny boiler.
It's Tommy's wife.
Oh, my God! Code red, code red! What happened? She doesn't want to see us.
Give us your key, Scarl.
I've had enough of this.
And me.
Ow! What's going on? What are you crazy cats up to? Are you drunk? There's something different about you.
It's her hair.
D'you like it? Doesn't look like you.
Yeah, it's lovely.
Can we just say one thing, Mum, which is that we love you.
And we're all upset too that Grandpa Frank died.
We're sorry we didn't think about what you were going through when it happened.
But it's not because we don't love you with all our hearts.
Thank you.
I love you too, Martin.
All right.
And you, H.
And you Auntie - Concentrate, Kevin.
But I'm not going back to your Dad.
Is there someone else, Mum? Cos I think we'd all understand it more if there was.
I wouldn't.
Yeah, but you'd try, though.
No, I wouldn't.
Well, maybe there is.
Who? Maybe she's going to ring him up and see him this weekend.
It's just that maybe there's something new out there that might be better for me.
This is ridiculous.
Who cares if there's someone out there more suited to you? What does that mean anyway? H.
Why are you looking at someone else? Because I want to.
Why don't you care about your husband, the man you've committed to? Why don't you care about what he wants? Because I've done that for years and now I need to put myself first, H.
This is frightening.
H! Heather! Who wants a cup of tea? Er, yeah.
Er, do you want me to put the recycling out the front? Eryeah.
Ooh, so helpful.
What was that all about? 'Welcome back to late-night banter with me, Charlie 'Hiya, you're through to Louise Anderson.
Please leave a message after the tone.
Thank you.
' My biggest fear? Oh, this'll be interesting! My biggest fear, I suppose, is .
.
is not being happy.
Whatever that entails.
And I think that I think that, if you are unhappy, then you owe it to yourself to change things.
Louise Anderson? I just put the phone down.
I had this big speech in my head.
I was going to refer to Camilla Parker-Bowles and Imogen Thomas and Kristen Stewart.
But it was 25 minutes long and in the shock of hearing it was her, I panicked and couldn't remember how it started.
Little pigeon-breasted plain-faced Louise Anderson? She is exactly his type, Ashley.
She's pretty - Oh, come on.
Oh, she is really pretty, Ashley, and she's sexy, in a Sports Centre kind of way, and she's nice and unthreatening and she's fertile.
Do you really think something happened? I don't know.
Maybe it was just an innocent fire prevention visit.
I believe they can happen.
But you see, if it's not her now, it's gonna be someone, at some point.
Jealousy don't come from nowhere, it comes because you feel threatened, and you feel threatened because there's a threat, and the reason jealousy is so painful is because it's an alarm that is insisting you wake up to that threat and don't sleep through it! Was that part of your speech? It was towards the end, yeah.
It was good you kept it to yourself, then.
Talk to Charlie.
But he'll lie.
Already there's lies.
And now he's gonna see me humiliated by her in your stupid dance competition.
We are We are gonna win that.
If you get your arms right.
We're better than last year.
She'll turn up all lithe with some snaky-hipped gay guy and I'll be clomping around with a man who spends half his life dressed as an eight-foot elephant! I really want him to see me win it, Ashley.
What do I say? You say, 'hello'.
And you ask him if he'd like to see the film and you ask him to come round and pick you up.
I don't want to overegg the hand of friendship.
No, that would be sticky.
But he can still come and pick you up.
Why am I doing this? Because you're going forward sweetheart, not going back.
'Hello'.
Is he a looker? Hello? Hello.
Hello? Hello.
Helloooo! Hello.
That's not the only thing you say.
Mr Bachman.
ErPauline? Er, yes.
'How nice to hear from you.
' This may sound odd, but I'm no longer living with my husband.
You don't have to say that! Oh, I'm sorry to hear that.
Peter, I was wondering if you'd like to see a film - The Great Gatsby.
Er, you know, from the from the book.
Hello? Don't start all that again! I'd love to see the film with you.
Shall we say tomorrow? Tomorrow? Yes.
Tea.
Dad? Thank you.
Just on the off-chance that you're bothered, Mum's had her hair done.
And is off on a date tomorrow night with a man who Martin said has wooed her with poetry, and no doubt will progress to flowers.
Your phone is on the tray.
Could be a window cleaner and do the local streets.
They protect their turf with guns and knives that lot, they're mafia.
Window cleaners have a mafia? Hello.
Hi.
One second.
Hey, don't leave us.
Why are you leaving us? Who is she? It's H.
It's H? You touch my sister, you touch me.
I want her dead! Hello.
I heard your programme last night.
Oh, poor you, have you recovered? You were really funny at times.
At times? Only at times? Well, you weren't funny during the news.
That wasn't funny.
No, the news is poor.
The weather's sometimes hilarious, but never the news.
Did you get my text? I did, yeah.
Charlie, one of my alarms isn't working.
OK.
Have you checked the battery? Yeah, I've changed that, yeah.
OK, well, it's probably more serious and erm we can pop along and change it.
This Saturday? Midday? Yeah.
I'll put that in the book.
OK.
Bye, bye, bye.
Bye.
Thanks for looking these out, Scarlett, but are they Spanish enough? They're sexy but are they Spanish? Oh, I know what I've got.
They're from Madrid airport.
Oh, find, find.
They are genuine Spanish tat.
Oh, that's bound to impress the judges.
Subconsciously.
Won't it? Charlie's gotta see me win this! Is this your mum? Yeah.
Have you been looking for her online? A bit.
Please don't tell my Gran.
Oh, no, of course.
Oh, earrings.
Let's have a look! Oh, thank you! They are perfect.
What do you think? Are you all right? Why shouldn't I be? Apart from the weirdness of being with my mum who's taken her wedding ring off to go on a date.
You must be Peter.
Yes.
Well, come in, come in, I'm Rowan, the sister.
Pleased to meet you.
Hello, Pauline.
Mr Bachman.
And I'm Heather.
The daughter.
Right.
What time are you getting her home? Half-past ten.
No later.
No, you stay out as long as you want.
Now, come on - you'll miss your pre-film bar meal.
Off you go! Come on.
And you won't need that.
Yes, I will.
I will I've just seen Mum, looking beautiful.
Going off in another man's car.
What kind of car were it? Jaguar.
S-type.
Mmm.
What year? Dad, can we not talk about the car! Can we talk about the woman in the car and the fact that she took her wedding ring off before she went out.
I've been watching her for ten minutes and there has been nothing, not even eye contact between her and Charlie.
That's good.
That's awful, Ashley.
That's highly suspicious.
Can't believe you don't know that.
H, I got you a drink.
Oh, Ashley, come and meet everyone.
These are my brothers Martin and Kevin.
And Sarah, Abbie and Nathan.
I didn't recognise you without your trunk.
You should wear it tonight.
You wouldn't win but you'd get a few laughs.
Charlie, who you know.
All right mate.
And this my dad, Ken.
Dad? The competitors in tonight's heat of Strictly Come Cov are: from Binley Woods, Mr and Mrs Barry Clow.
From Chapelfield, Mr Sebastian Clacka and Miss Georgina Ratatatigan.
Hi! Hey! You look lovely, great earrings.
Thanks.
Have you put on weight since the last competition? No.
Oh! From Ernesford Grange, Mr Carl Tylsley and Ms Louise Anderson.
That was cheap.
Yup.
Come on, Ashley.
From Radford, Mr Ashley Roehampton and Miss Heather McCallister.
Have you been here before? Yes, yes.
I'd come here occasionally with my wife, erm before the cinema or theatre.
Or a concert.
What was she like, your wife? In what way? Er, inin every way.
Was shewas she tall, short? Did shedid she have an eye patch, a parrot? Was she? Stop me before I make a complete fool of myself.
Well, er, she was a teacher.
Oh, was that, was that how you met? No.
We met through the parrot.
Do you need to get that? No, it's fine.
Just a second.
What? You're on a date! What's it to you if I'm on a date? So quickly? You must have been seeing this muggins behind my back.
Ken, no, I was not seeing a muggins behind your back! I bet it's that prat from the school, innit? Who gave you that book of poetry.
It is not the prat from the school.
Oh, yes, it is! So she was a teacher? Yes, yes.
And, and is the first date you've had since she died? It is, yes.
One second.
What? I am with a man who used to go on dates with his wife to the cinema! I took you to the cinema once! It was Herbie Rides Again! And it was so long ago we got there by tram! I am with a man who knows how to give a woman a good time! Are you sure you want to see the film? Yes, I am.
And I hate this hair.
Well, mess it up, then.
And let's go, Pauline.
For our final dance-off can we have our four Flamenco couples, please? Whatever happens, you've danced beautifully tonight.
Now, as the dance-off continues, our Judge Jefferson will point at a couple to eliminate.
We'll then be left with our winner.
Come on, Heather! Good luck to you all! Go on, Heather! Go on, Heather! That's brilliant.
Thanks.
Are you gonna come round tomorrow at midday? Yeah! You did absolutely great.
You're not going to put that through his windscreen, are you? That is my wife.
Who are you? Vivienne.
Tommy's wife.
Oh.
Hi.
Hi.
You get all prickly, don't you, when you see them together? But it passes.
Do you find it passes, Mr Paradise? It's my first time.
Even though I've known almost all my marriage, that to keep a man like Tommy I have to share him.
That for my marriage to be as good as it is .
.
I have to let him have a life away from me as well.
It doesn't sound good.
Your marriage sounds shaky.
All marriages are vulnerable, Mr Paradise.
Otherwise being married wouldn't be worth anything, would it? Do you want this? I'll have the next one.
I feel like we should be celebrating.
I feel like we should be parading the trophy on an open-top bus.
Aaaah! Ashley bloody Roehampton, this is my favourite frock! No! No! Night, then.
Well done tonight.
And you.
Night, then.
You can come in and get a towel if you want.
Yeah, all right.
By the time that we met, I'd had a number of girlfriends.
Gail, Lisa, Lisa's sister, Blodwyn But I'd never felt like I'd been in love.
And I said to my mum how do you know when you've fallen in love for real? And she said Er.
she said, 'Because you do.
And one day you'll walk into a room and there'll be violins playing, and there'll be trumpets going off.
And you'll have wondered into a concert hall.
No.
The orchestra will have started playing without you.
No, no and it'll be love.
And it'll be you.
Bang.
Like that.
Well done for tonight.
Ssh.
What was the film like? Quite interesting.
Everyone was very young.
Nice costumes, quite loud.
Pauline I'm not interested in the film at all.
Did he give it a go? Rowan.
Oh, come on, it's fun! Are you seeing him again? He said he'd call.
OK, when? I don't know.
If he doesn't text within a day he's a swine, and if he doesn't call within three he's off your list.
I hardly have a list.
I'm making one for you.
Well, I'm off then.
Where? To see Grandpa Frank.
I'll come with you if you give me half an hour.
He's not a swine.
He's not a swine, Pauline.
It's Ken.
Roses are red, violets are blue, I'm doing a car but thinking of you'.
Probably took him all morning to write that.
Hi.
Hi.
Last night shouldn't have happened, Ashley.
Sorry.
OK.
Are you sorry? I dunno.
Oh, don't say that, you big fool.
No, you're right, it shouldn't have happened.
But something was going to happen, wasn't it? I love you, Heather.
I love everything about you and I have done for a long time.
I love the way you look, the way you talk.
How you get stroppy, how you make me laugh, your eyes.
I love seeing you every day and I can't help thinking if things had been different, things would be different and I've seen you think that.
And I think that maybe, maybe if you thought about that magazine article, it wouldn't be Charlie.
It would be somebody who looked like me that you'd be matched up with.
Hard to believe how people move Falling out of love with you Yes! Tearing down all the walls And love, the chaos Your mum used to draw.
When she was tiny she'd come and stay and she'd draw me meadows full of wild flowers.
Hello, love, I've come to change your faulty alarm.
Right.
Erm, come in.
You and I It's just up there.
Ah, right.
How we lived together always Morning, David.
How are you doing, my man? My heart still beats for you My heart still beats for you After all It's always you Out into the palace of dreams come the Sky Blues.
With today's opponents scared to death by the ferocity of the crowd's roar.
Very, very excited by today's matchup.
We're all right, aren't we, H? Yeah, course.
She's been visiting Grandpa's grave.
She's written to me and I've spoken to her on the phone.
Mum, you've gotta come.
We need you! Kev's been arrested by the police.
What's going on? Everybody seems to know stuff except for me.
Not since my wife died have I enjoyed the company of a woman like yours.
And I have not made a bid for a better life in order to dress up like Sue Barker over there and do this! This business between us stops.
This family is not falling apart, and stop trying to make out it is.
What? I don't want to live in that house anymore.
Or with Ken.
I retired today.
Pass us that wrench will you? I'll miss you, er, Mrs Paradise.
It's a line.
That means I'm ovulating, Charlie.
We've gotta do it now.
Don't tell Sarah but I'm about 600 short for Nathan's trip to France.
Your mum used to draw.
She'd draw me meadows full of wild flowers.
Will you help me find my mum, Grandpa Frank? I'm not going to be a daughter, or a wife, or a mum anymore.
I'm going.
: Where are you going? Rowan's.
I wish I had your face.
Well, you haven't, so tell Debbie what you want.
I don't know what I want.
She has a lovely round face, Debbie, but she doesn't need anything to exaggerate it.
And she needs a colour.
I like being grey.
Don't listen to her when she says that.
It's a desperate lie and she's been peddling it for years.
I don't want to go over the top.
When's that ever happened? My kids'll think I'm mutton dressed as lamb.
Mutton dressed as lamb still looks like lamb - and that's half the battle.
It's the entire war.
From the horse's mouth.
Heather will think I'm absurd.
It's not about your kids now, Paul.
They're grown up.
The first thing to remember about a fire extinguisher is that it is not a toy.
It might look big and red and full of fun, but you must fight the urge to blast your family as they sit down to Sunday dinner cos you could take someone's eye out.
Now, when I find myself approaching a fire extinguisher, I always tell myself to be serious, to be responsible.
Bloody hell! Who took the safety pin out of that?! Do you think I'm the only woman that has ever found my Kevin attractive? No, no, there was a blind girl at school he went out with for a while.
She had terrible eyesight.
She had to wear an eye patch, didn't she Martin? What, Kev's girlfriend? Yeah.
Aw! He's not like your Charlie though, is he? Puts on that uniform, women hurl cats up trees hoping he'll come round and rescue them.
Nice! When you actually find 'the one', you feel so lucky.
Yeah, I'm the lucky one.
Because some people in the world never have our kind of luck, and they make do, or they don't do and every day I have to pinch myself that someone like Charlie could ever fall in love with me.
But you're fantastic.
Aw, we know that.
But some people think, because I'm a little bit older, four or five years, actually, that I'm some kind of mother figure.
Which is nice.
Get your feet off the coffee table.
I'm joking! I'm joking! No, actually, get your feet off.
A smoke alarm is a fireman's best friend.
90 percent of deaths in house fires are caused by smoke inhalation, so the correct installation of smoke alarms in your house are gonna save the lives of the people that you love the most.
Your children.
Louise? Heather McCallister.
Do you remember, I danced in the in the Flamenco competition at the sports centre last September.
Yeah, hi.
I thought you danced really well.
Thank you.
Are you doing the competition at the Guildhall this Friday? You? I'll be there.
This bloke is gorgeous, isn't he? He's my husband.
Yeah, but seriously.
No, seriously.
He's not your Flamenco partner, is he? No he's not my Flamenco partner, he's my husband.
I've got leaflets here on where best to site the alarms, and we're doing a community initiative where we're offering free home visits to install the devices.
Is it Carl you dance with? Is he your husband? No, Carl's as camp as a row of tents.
No, I'm divorced.
Good luck Friday, yeah? Thank you.
Jealousy's odd, isn't it? It's like you but it isn't you.
It's like that thing in Alien that just bursts out your stomach and looks around for a bit, snarling.
Yeah, and everyone can see it.
Exactly! You're having a perfectly pleasant breakfast with all the other astronauts and suddenly it's boosh! Family meeting, please.
Family meeting.
Before you leave, will all members of the Paradise family please join me here at fire tender two.
Heather! What is it? Mum and Dad.
How will we get them back together? Have any of you talked to your mum since your grandad's funeral? She turned her mobile off.
I rang Auntie Rowan's but she wouldn't come to the phone.
Why is Mum ruining our lives? Put the microphone down.
Are you cooking for your Dad? Yeah.
But he's fixing his cars and going down the pub.
He hasn't mentioned her once.
Why are we trying to fix things? Why don't we just let them - ? I've got a plan, so shut up.
Don't talk to her like that.
We have to make sure they're coming to Joseph's birthday.
Are they coming, Martin? Yeah, they should be.
Did you enjoy your lovely little chat? Who with? Who with? She said she danced Flamenco with you.
And did she book in to have her alarms installed? Yes.
I hope you're not gonna to do it.
Not if you don't want me to, no.
Did she tell you she's divorced? What? What? Can we not turn this into the Jeremy Kyle show! We've got one estranged couple in the family.
I can't cope with two.
We've got to come up with a plan! You said you had.
OK, yeah.
I saw this work once in a Quentin Tarantino movie.
I tell Dad that Mum's missing him.
H, you tell Mum the same.
They'll both think the other's given in first and before you know it they'll be in Las Vegas renewing their vowels.
Vows.
Which Tarantino movie's this? Let it go.
Is your mum definitely coming to the party? Of course! She's never missed one of her grandchildren's birthdays! Turn it off! Is it something that will kill her? Turn it off! Pretty woman, walking down the street Pretty woman, the kind I like to meet Pretty woman I don't believe you, you're not the truth Did I buy Joseph a space hopper last year? Ooh, ooh, ooh, ooh.
Have you turned into a monkey? You'd look fantastic in that! No, Rowan, I wouldn't, I'd look like you.
You've never let me shop for you, have you? If I'd done your shopping for your entire adult life you wouldn't be in the state you're in now! Oi! In your anorak with yoghurt down the front, and your casual trousers that would disgrace a French lesbian.
Code red! Code red! Look! Bloody hell, run for it! What is it? Just run for it, leave the shopping.
What is it? Quick, it's Tommy's wife! Quick! We've got these signals, a kind of code for the kept woman.
Code Blue is he's free all weekend.
Hang on, it's gonna to be a bumpy ride.
Well, it is.
That's what it amounts to.
Green is I'm out to pasture.
I'm unable to see you.
And red is 'Panic! The wife's around!' And you should panic, the things she's said about you.
I think in another life she may have had bunny-boiler tendencies.
I'm sure she's a very nice woman.
Arms good.
Much improved.
Rhythm! Rhythm! Look at me.
Heather! I am looking at you.
No! Look at me with red-hot desire.
I wanna see lust in every part of your body, popping out of your fleece.
Ashley! I'm a married woman, you can't talk to me like that.
Ashley is the marketing manager of the club, and he's the one who got me into Flamenco.
And he dresses up as the club mascot on match days.
Sky Blue Sam.
And occasionally he'll combine both his passions and Sam will do a bit of Flamenco.
on the touchline, in honour of the Spanish left back.
Oh, he's lovely, though, isn't he? I was in the dentist once.
Only once? No, but it was a few years ago, and there's an article in a magazine that haunts me.
About teeth? No.
No.
They'd taken pictures of ten couples on their wedding day, cut the photos down the middle, gave the bride photos to 100 men, and the grooms to 100 women, and asked them who they thought the most attractive.
It ranked them one to ten, and the couples completely matched up.
The tens had married the tens and the ones had got stuck with each other.
Oh! I think I'd be a four.
I think Charlie'd be a nine.
And I think I'm a six.
Maybe six and half when I wear that Monsoon trouser suit.
Heather, you are What? You are a very handsome woman.
What did I say? You say the word handsome to a woman, it means you think she looks like a horse! Then I meant 'stunning'.
I-I meant 'surprisingly attractive'.
You and Charlie are the most in love couple I've ever met.
I can't imagine a couple moremore perfect for each other than you two.
Ho, ho, senorita! If I turn the lights out I can get my arm positions right in the window.
It's fine.
I often dress up myself, turn the lights out, when you're out the flat.
Turn them out, come on, give it a go.
No.
Please! No.
Please dance with me Charlie.
Just once.
Come on! All right, all right.
Right All right.
What do I do? Right, stand like this and your arms like this.
Mm-hm.
And think Spanish.
Right.
I'm thinking about paella.
Now do this.
Aargh! My nose! Are you all right? I'll never be able to play the kazoo again! Oh! Heather? Why not? OK.
Let me get out of this dress.
No the dress is great.
Keep the dress on.
Why? No reason.
Cos you can imagine I'm someone else? Louise 'Little Tits' Anderson, maybe? After she's won the cup on Friday? Heather What? Gangnam Style Hi! Where is he? Where's my Joey? Happy Birthday, sweetness.
Hey, what do you say Joe? Can I open them? No, you say 'thank you'.
Hiya, Dad.
You all right? When's Nanny coming with my present, Grandpa? Joe! Don't know, love.
We've got a trampoline! We've got a trampoline! It's not up yet.
Is Charlie here? No.
He isn't? No.
Hiya! How long have you been dancing? Oh, umabout five years.
Have you ever thought about taking it up? No, it's not my thing.
I like my sport, I like doing my radio show, I like my job.
There's not a inner Spaniard inside you bursting to get out? Well there is, but he wants to play for Barcelona, not prance around with a pair of maracas.
You should definitely be dancing.
Is it the second one on the landing? Yeah.
There's a beer in the fridge if you want one? Er, aye, thanks.
Did you tell Mum what we planned? She isn't answering her phone.
I'll talk to her here.
Kev told Dad she was missing him.
He didn't say anything.
I said she was thinking of shooting herself.
That's not true nor helpful.
Why sugar-coat the thing? Auntie Heather, our trampoline's up.
Can we go on it now? What did Dad say? 'Pass me the spanner.
' Put the trampoline up.
Look! Do you think she'll come? Look at my present! Don't answer the phone, this is serious.
It's Mum.
Oh, my God! Kids out, now! It's Mum on the phone! Mum? Is he there? Yeah, Dad's here.
And he's missing you terribly, Mum.
He's all over the place.
He's bought a trampoline and he's been putting it up for the kids.
I got the trampoline.
Sorry, Kev got that.
We got that?! How much was it? It was a cheap one.
But safe.
Are you gonna come over, Mum? Did he get Joseph a present? Did Dad get a present? Yeah, he got him a Roald Dahl book.
Look, we're all here, Mum.
Are you gonna come over? Dad said he'd love to talk to you.
Give Joe my love.
I can always tell when Heather's lying.
She touches her nose.
You can tell that on the phone? He just assumes I would get the present.
Like I've got every present for the last 40 years.
We should still go to the party.
Why? Cos Joseph will be upset.
It's good you've done this, Paul.
Life will get better for you now you've left him.
Now I've left my husband? You've left a world of pain, not a man - and it's been difficult to watch you down the years.
This is the first time we're going to get drunk together for 40 years.
So take your jacket off and let's find a Tom Hanks movie and stare at his buttocks.
Hey, Nathan, give us a spin.
What's wrong with you, you moody sod? You all right? I'm off the rugby tour to France.
What? They say Dad hasn't paid.
Kevin, you said you'd written a cheque.
I did.
You haven't paid, Dad.
Nathan I wrote the cheque, I promise.
So why am I off the tour? It must have bounced, but I still wrote it.
It'll be fine Sarah.
How? Because I promised him he'd go and he'll go.
Why the black look? How much was that trampoline? Did you see that black look? Aaaaah! Why's no-one missing Grandpa Frank? They are, Scarlett.
It's the first birthday any of us have ever had where he's not scoffed all the best sandwiches and no-one's mentioned him.
It's like no-one mentions my mum.
Do people just forget them? Well, this week it's Joe's birthday, and last week your Auntie Pauline had a barney with your Uncle Ken.
Life goes on, it doesn't mean that people that used to be here aren't missed.
Mm? When are you going to talk to Mum? Dad? She'll be back.
You don't know that! Don't you think maybe you should do something to show her how much she means to you? I don't do flowers.
Well, what do you do? Because she's not psychic.
A woman needs to be shown how much she's loved, Dad.
That she's thought of.
Hiya.
Where've you been? The shift ran on.
Why didn't you text? I did, didn't I? No.
I thought you'd go straight to the radio station.
No, I've got half an hour.
Come on, Charlie, five a side, man? Kev, you know that money that went missing from the Rugby Club the night of the quiz? Yeah.
Gary said that some prat has returned it in an envelope with 'sorry' written in letters cut out of a newspaper.
Sounds like somebody's been watching too many films.
Yeah, crap films.
Charlie! Charlie! Ahhhhhhhhhh! In all your years, Paulie-Paul, do you think Kinetic Ken ever's strayed? No.
Are you sure? Well, he fancied a barmaid down the Hare and Squirrel for a couple of years.
I used to lie awakelistening to him talking about her in his sleep.
And he'd say 'Ruth.
Get off!' And have you strayed? When would I have the time? But you're free.
Have you done this because you've seen someone? No, no.
But there might be someone.
Whom? He gave me a poem.
Oh! He gave you a poem?! Yeah.
And he's a widower.
His name is Peter Bachman.
Bachman! He's a teacher.
And he gave me a book when I retired.
With his number in it.
The randy goat! No.
Oh, yes! Oh, yes! Randy barman! We're gonna get some more wine.
And we're gonna get this poetry book with the secret number.
I'm not ringing him up.
We most certainly are! No! Hey, hey! A car just pulled up in the drive.
Well, it won't be Tommy.
The bunny boiler.
It's Tommy's wife.
Oh, my God! Code red, code red! What happened? She doesn't want to see us.
Give us your key, Scarl.
I've had enough of this.
And me.
Ow! What's going on? What are you crazy cats up to? Are you drunk? There's something different about you.
It's her hair.
D'you like it? Doesn't look like you.
Yeah, it's lovely.
Can we just say one thing, Mum, which is that we love you.
And we're all upset too that Grandpa Frank died.
We're sorry we didn't think about what you were going through when it happened.
But it's not because we don't love you with all our hearts.
Thank you.
I love you too, Martin.
All right.
And you, H.
And you Auntie - Concentrate, Kevin.
But I'm not going back to your Dad.
Is there someone else, Mum? Cos I think we'd all understand it more if there was.
I wouldn't.
Yeah, but you'd try, though.
No, I wouldn't.
Well, maybe there is.
Who? Maybe she's going to ring him up and see him this weekend.
It's just that maybe there's something new out there that might be better for me.
This is ridiculous.
Who cares if there's someone out there more suited to you? What does that mean anyway? H.
Why are you looking at someone else? Because I want to.
Why don't you care about your husband, the man you've committed to? Why don't you care about what he wants? Because I've done that for years and now I need to put myself first, H.
This is frightening.
H! Heather! Who wants a cup of tea? Er, yeah.
Er, do you want me to put the recycling out the front? Eryeah.
Ooh, so helpful.
What was that all about? 'Welcome back to late-night banter with me, Charlie 'Hiya, you're through to Louise Anderson.
Please leave a message after the tone.
Thank you.
' My biggest fear? Oh, this'll be interesting! My biggest fear, I suppose, is .
.
is not being happy.
Whatever that entails.
And I think that I think that, if you are unhappy, then you owe it to yourself to change things.
Louise Anderson? I just put the phone down.
I had this big speech in my head.
I was going to refer to Camilla Parker-Bowles and Imogen Thomas and Kristen Stewart.
But it was 25 minutes long and in the shock of hearing it was her, I panicked and couldn't remember how it started.
Little pigeon-breasted plain-faced Louise Anderson? She is exactly his type, Ashley.
She's pretty - Oh, come on.
Oh, she is really pretty, Ashley, and she's sexy, in a Sports Centre kind of way, and she's nice and unthreatening and she's fertile.
Do you really think something happened? I don't know.
Maybe it was just an innocent fire prevention visit.
I believe they can happen.
But you see, if it's not her now, it's gonna be someone, at some point.
Jealousy don't come from nowhere, it comes because you feel threatened, and you feel threatened because there's a threat, and the reason jealousy is so painful is because it's an alarm that is insisting you wake up to that threat and don't sleep through it! Was that part of your speech? It was towards the end, yeah.
It was good you kept it to yourself, then.
Talk to Charlie.
But he'll lie.
Already there's lies.
And now he's gonna see me humiliated by her in your stupid dance competition.
We are We are gonna win that.
If you get your arms right.
We're better than last year.
She'll turn up all lithe with some snaky-hipped gay guy and I'll be clomping around with a man who spends half his life dressed as an eight-foot elephant! I really want him to see me win it, Ashley.
What do I say? You say, 'hello'.
And you ask him if he'd like to see the film and you ask him to come round and pick you up.
I don't want to overegg the hand of friendship.
No, that would be sticky.
But he can still come and pick you up.
Why am I doing this? Because you're going forward sweetheart, not going back.
'Hello'.
Is he a looker? Hello? Hello.
Hello? Hello.
Helloooo! Hello.
That's not the only thing you say.
Mr Bachman.
ErPauline? Er, yes.
'How nice to hear from you.
' This may sound odd, but I'm no longer living with my husband.
You don't have to say that! Oh, I'm sorry to hear that.
Peter, I was wondering if you'd like to see a film - The Great Gatsby.
Er, you know, from the from the book.
Hello? Don't start all that again! I'd love to see the film with you.
Shall we say tomorrow? Tomorrow? Yes.
Tea.
Dad? Thank you.
Just on the off-chance that you're bothered, Mum's had her hair done.
And is off on a date tomorrow night with a man who Martin said has wooed her with poetry, and no doubt will progress to flowers.
Your phone is on the tray.
Could be a window cleaner and do the local streets.
They protect their turf with guns and knives that lot, they're mafia.
Window cleaners have a mafia? Hello.
Hi.
One second.
Hey, don't leave us.
Why are you leaving us? Who is she? It's H.
It's H? You touch my sister, you touch me.
I want her dead! Hello.
I heard your programme last night.
Oh, poor you, have you recovered? You were really funny at times.
At times? Only at times? Well, you weren't funny during the news.
That wasn't funny.
No, the news is poor.
The weather's sometimes hilarious, but never the news.
Did you get my text? I did, yeah.
Charlie, one of my alarms isn't working.
OK.
Have you checked the battery? Yeah, I've changed that, yeah.
OK, well, it's probably more serious and erm we can pop along and change it.
This Saturday? Midday? Yeah.
I'll put that in the book.
OK.
Bye, bye, bye.
Bye.
Thanks for looking these out, Scarlett, but are they Spanish enough? They're sexy but are they Spanish? Oh, I know what I've got.
They're from Madrid airport.
Oh, find, find.
They are genuine Spanish tat.
Oh, that's bound to impress the judges.
Subconsciously.
Won't it? Charlie's gotta see me win this! Is this your mum? Yeah.
Have you been looking for her online? A bit.
Please don't tell my Gran.
Oh, no, of course.
Oh, earrings.
Let's have a look! Oh, thank you! They are perfect.
What do you think? Are you all right? Why shouldn't I be? Apart from the weirdness of being with my mum who's taken her wedding ring off to go on a date.
You must be Peter.
Yes.
Well, come in, come in, I'm Rowan, the sister.
Pleased to meet you.
Hello, Pauline.
Mr Bachman.
And I'm Heather.
The daughter.
Right.
What time are you getting her home? Half-past ten.
No later.
No, you stay out as long as you want.
Now, come on - you'll miss your pre-film bar meal.
Off you go! Come on.
And you won't need that.
Yes, I will.
I will I've just seen Mum, looking beautiful.
Going off in another man's car.
What kind of car were it? Jaguar.
S-type.
Mmm.
What year? Dad, can we not talk about the car! Can we talk about the woman in the car and the fact that she took her wedding ring off before she went out.
I've been watching her for ten minutes and there has been nothing, not even eye contact between her and Charlie.
That's good.
That's awful, Ashley.
That's highly suspicious.
Can't believe you don't know that.
H, I got you a drink.
Oh, Ashley, come and meet everyone.
These are my brothers Martin and Kevin.
And Sarah, Abbie and Nathan.
I didn't recognise you without your trunk.
You should wear it tonight.
You wouldn't win but you'd get a few laughs.
Charlie, who you know.
All right mate.
And this my dad, Ken.
Dad? The competitors in tonight's heat of Strictly Come Cov are: from Binley Woods, Mr and Mrs Barry Clow.
From Chapelfield, Mr Sebastian Clacka and Miss Georgina Ratatatigan.
Hi! Hey! You look lovely, great earrings.
Thanks.
Have you put on weight since the last competition? No.
Oh! From Ernesford Grange, Mr Carl Tylsley and Ms Louise Anderson.
That was cheap.
Yup.
Come on, Ashley.
From Radford, Mr Ashley Roehampton and Miss Heather McCallister.
Have you been here before? Yes, yes.
I'd come here occasionally with my wife, erm before the cinema or theatre.
Or a concert.
What was she like, your wife? In what way? Er, inin every way.
Was shewas she tall, short? Did shedid she have an eye patch, a parrot? Was she? Stop me before I make a complete fool of myself.
Well, er, she was a teacher.
Oh, was that, was that how you met? No.
We met through the parrot.
Do you need to get that? No, it's fine.
Just a second.
What? You're on a date! What's it to you if I'm on a date? So quickly? You must have been seeing this muggins behind my back.
Ken, no, I was not seeing a muggins behind your back! I bet it's that prat from the school, innit? Who gave you that book of poetry.
It is not the prat from the school.
Oh, yes, it is! So she was a teacher? Yes, yes.
And, and is the first date you've had since she died? It is, yes.
One second.
What? I am with a man who used to go on dates with his wife to the cinema! I took you to the cinema once! It was Herbie Rides Again! And it was so long ago we got there by tram! I am with a man who knows how to give a woman a good time! Are you sure you want to see the film? Yes, I am.
And I hate this hair.
Well, mess it up, then.
And let's go, Pauline.
For our final dance-off can we have our four Flamenco couples, please? Whatever happens, you've danced beautifully tonight.
Now, as the dance-off continues, our Judge Jefferson will point at a couple to eliminate.
We'll then be left with our winner.
Come on, Heather! Good luck to you all! Go on, Heather! Go on, Heather! That's brilliant.
Thanks.
Are you gonna come round tomorrow at midday? Yeah! You did absolutely great.
You're not going to put that through his windscreen, are you? That is my wife.
Who are you? Vivienne.
Tommy's wife.
Oh.
Hi.
Hi.
You get all prickly, don't you, when you see them together? But it passes.
Do you find it passes, Mr Paradise? It's my first time.
Even though I've known almost all my marriage, that to keep a man like Tommy I have to share him.
That for my marriage to be as good as it is .
.
I have to let him have a life away from me as well.
It doesn't sound good.
Your marriage sounds shaky.
All marriages are vulnerable, Mr Paradise.
Otherwise being married wouldn't be worth anything, would it? Do you want this? I'll have the next one.
I feel like we should be celebrating.
I feel like we should be parading the trophy on an open-top bus.
Aaaah! Ashley bloody Roehampton, this is my favourite frock! No! No! Night, then.
Well done tonight.
And you.
Night, then.
You can come in and get a towel if you want.
Yeah, all right.
By the time that we met, I'd had a number of girlfriends.
Gail, Lisa, Lisa's sister, Blodwyn But I'd never felt like I'd been in love.
And I said to my mum how do you know when you've fallen in love for real? And she said Er.
she said, 'Because you do.
And one day you'll walk into a room and there'll be violins playing, and there'll be trumpets going off.
And you'll have wondered into a concert hall.
No.
The orchestra will have started playing without you.
No, no and it'll be love.
And it'll be you.
Bang.
Like that.
Well done for tonight.
Ssh.
What was the film like? Quite interesting.
Everyone was very young.
Nice costumes, quite loud.
Pauline I'm not interested in the film at all.
Did he give it a go? Rowan.
Oh, come on, it's fun! Are you seeing him again? He said he'd call.
OK, when? I don't know.
If he doesn't text within a day he's a swine, and if he doesn't call within three he's off your list.
I hardly have a list.
I'm making one for you.
Well, I'm off then.
Where? To see Grandpa Frank.
I'll come with you if you give me half an hour.
He's not a swine.
He's not a swine, Pauline.
It's Ken.
Roses are red, violets are blue, I'm doing a car but thinking of you'.
Probably took him all morning to write that.
Hi.
Hi.
Last night shouldn't have happened, Ashley.
Sorry.
OK.
Are you sorry? I dunno.
Oh, don't say that, you big fool.
No, you're right, it shouldn't have happened.
But something was going to happen, wasn't it? I love you, Heather.
I love everything about you and I have done for a long time.
I love the way you look, the way you talk.
How you get stroppy, how you make me laugh, your eyes.
I love seeing you every day and I can't help thinking if things had been different, things would be different and I've seen you think that.
And I think that maybe, maybe if you thought about that magazine article, it wouldn't be Charlie.
It would be somebody who looked like me that you'd be matched up with.
Hard to believe how people move Falling out of love with you Yes! Tearing down all the walls And love, the chaos Your mum used to draw.
When she was tiny she'd come and stay and she'd draw me meadows full of wild flowers.
Hello, love, I've come to change your faulty alarm.
Right.
Erm, come in.
You and I It's just up there.
Ah, right.
How we lived together always Morning, David.
How are you doing, my man? My heart still beats for you My heart still beats for you After all It's always you Out into the palace of dreams come the Sky Blues.
With today's opponents scared to death by the ferocity of the crowd's roar.
Very, very excited by today's matchup.
We're all right, aren't we, H? Yeah, course.
She's been visiting Grandpa's grave.
She's written to me and I've spoken to her on the phone.
Mum, you've gotta come.
We need you! Kev's been arrested by the police.
What's going on? Everybody seems to know stuff except for me.
Not since my wife died have I enjoyed the company of a woman like yours.
And I have not made a bid for a better life in order to dress up like Sue Barker over there and do this! This business between us stops.
This family is not falling apart, and stop trying to make out it is.