Nice Work (1980) s01e02 Episode Script

1 (Man on radio) The metaphor of travel, The Od the Odyssey, um, is You know, your your Joycean I mean, the the whole notion of travelling is almost a part of, er, of what - (Bangs letterbox) I mean, I often wonder who is not self-centred.
When people say - Dr Penrose! - (Bangs on door) - (Rings doorbell) - Dr Penrose! whether it would be a very agreeable thing to do or even a very proper one, erm, but there is a sense in which, (Banging continues) - What the hell are you doing? - I want a word with you.
For God's sake, you're disturbing the neighbours.
Let me in or I'll disturb the whole bloody street! Did you tell Danny Ram that I was plotting to sack him? Well, it's true isn't it? It's a bloody lie! It's standard procedure agreed with the unions! Three warnings and out.
- The man's incompetent.
- Why not make him competent, then? - He's been trained.
I checked.
- He - He couldn't grasp it.
- He needs special help.
Remedial training.
Remedial? I'm not running a bloody kindergarten, you know.
- I don't care - I'm running a business.
- Oh, for God's sake! - Or I was until you came on the scene.
Shadow! You're not a shadow, you're a bloody menace! Have you just been burgled or something? Did you just come here to relieve your anger, or have you something substantive to say? I'll tell you something substantive.
55 men walked out of the foundry this afternoon after you spoke to Danny Ram.
Well, I told him to keep the information to himself.
(Scoffs) How simple can you get? He told his mates, of course, and they all walked out in sympathy.
The shop stewards are considering whether to make the strike official.
Even if they don't, the Asians'll stay out for a fortnight at least.
I know them.
The Group could decide to cut its losses and close the factory.
You would be responsible for putting 500 men out of work, for good.
Look, I was just trying to prevent what I saw as an obvi What I still see as an obvious injustice.
You are meddling in things you don't understand.
- Now you've got to unmeddle them.
- What do you mean? I've arranged a meeting with Ram and the shop stewards tomorrow morning, first thing.
I want you to tell them that you made a mistake.
- What mistake? - You misunderstood the discussion.
There never was any question of firing Ram.
You got the wrong end of the stick.
Not surprising, really.
A university lecturer, wet behind the ears, first time in a factory.
They might just buy it You're asking me to lie to save your face? I'm asking you to save the factory.
And 500 jobs.
All right.
On one condition.
Danny.
Mr Wilcox has asked me, as personnel director, to chair this meeting.
As you know, there was an unfortunate, er, misunderstanding in the foundry yesterday afternoon.
Now I'm sure that we can clear this up to everyone's satisfaction.
Excuse me, Mr Prendergast.
Whose misunderstanding, may I ask? Mine.
Er, perhaps you would like to give your viewpoint, Dr Penrose.
Without going into too much detail.
Yes.
Ahem.
Well, I was attending a meeting, a management meeting in this room yesterday Observing.
She was observing, not attending.
I think we should make the point that Dr Penrose has nothing whatsoever to do with this company, and the company has no responsibility for her actions.
I think that's already been indicated to you, hasn't it? Er, yes.
Dr Penrose, please continue.
They were talking about, er Mr Ram.
Someone said that he wasn't competent at his job, so I (Speaking own language) I think we've all been aware of, er, problems within that section of the foundry.
Anyway, er Ahem.
I got the impression that they were talking about sacking Mr Ram, and I'm afraid I reacted rather hastily by rushing over to the foundry to warn him.
It seems that I was mistaken.
Mr Wilcox assures me that what he was proposing was a course of special training to ensure that Mr Ram would not be sacked.
(Speaking own language) - This training, will it be on full pay? - Absolutely.
The men will be paid for the stoppage time yesterday? (Snaps pencil) Er Well, I I We should insist on that.
Uh Well, in in order to bring this unfortunate matter to a speedy conclusion, and bearing in mind that it is a one-off situation, and sets absolutely no precedent, I think management would consider that request sympathetically.
(Speaking own language) - We agree to that.
- Ah.
(Chuckles) (Sighs) That's all right, then.
- Well, Danny, I hope that works out for you.
- (Moaning) Thank you.
Thank you, madam.
(Groaning) - So he conceded the point? - Mm.
With ill grace.
But yes.
Danny Ram is going to get special training.
You're a remarkable girl, Robyn.
- Woman.
- Woman, sorry.
(Laughs) - Mm.
- Mm.
Not that I got any thanks from Wilcox.
He didn't even say goodbye.
Turn over.
(Sighs) A little more oil, darling.
How do you like my nightdress? It's new.
It's a bit flimsy for this weather, isn't it? It's supposed to be the Dynasty look.
Don't talk to me about television, There's nothing worth watching on Saturday since they took off Match of the Day.
(Sniffs) What's that smell? My scent, silly.
Oh.
- Vic - Mm? It's a long time since we you know.
What? You know.
I thought you'd gone off it.
Oh, that was only a phase.
Part of the change of life.
It says so in the book.
Oh, for God's sake, Marjorie, what are you doing? Er, just a minute.
Er Where was it? Oh yes, listen.
"You may feel a revulsion against marital relations for a while.
"This is quite normal, and nothing to worry about.
"With time and patience, and an understanding partner, "your lib libby - Libido.
- Oh.
Freud invented it before he discovered the death instinct.
"Your libido will return stronger than ever.
" You mean you've got it back? Well, I dunno.
I won't, will I, until we try? I think we ought to give it a try, Vic.
Oh, why? Well, it's natural for married couples.
You used to want to.
Everything comes to an end.
But we're not old, Vic.
- The book says - Oh, fuck the book.
(Sobs) (Gasping) Ooh, thank you, darling.
- Mm.
- Ah, that was lovely.
- Good.
- Oh! Now it's your turn.
I could come into you, if you like.
(Sighs) Well, don't you like non-penetrative sex? Yes.
It's just that What? I just thought, for a change, we might have ordinary sex.
All right.
You don't sound very enthusiastic.
No, I'm fine.
Carry on.
Robyn, I can't carry on if you look at me like that.
- Like what? - As if I'd just failed a viva.
(Sighs) Look, I thought we'd discussed all this.
I thought we'd agreed that we've got to get away from the idea of the sexual act as possessive.
- Well, yes I know.
- (Sighs) I mean, it's hard to break old habits.
One has to persevere.
Yes, of course.
Dear Charles.
You may have failed the viva, but you were terrific at the practical.
(Vic) I'm sorry, love.
Um, only you You can't expect me to suddenly get all interested, out of the blue.
I thought we were past all that.
So we're not.
Good.
But just give me a chance to readjust, OK? I have my own problems, you know.
I know, Vic.
I know you have a lot of worries at work.
That silly bitch from the university's caused me no end of trouble.
Yeah? Then there's Brian Everthorpe with his daft idea for a calendar, which he claims Stuart Baxter approves of.
Why is Everthorpe in Baxter's confidence? That's what I'd like to know.
As long as it's not me.
- Of course it's not you, pet.
- Oh! (Laughs) - Night.
- Night, Vic.
(Laughter) Vic, you are interested after all.
Oh, Vic! Mm.
Are you going to go back to the factory next week? I shouldn't think so.
I thought you wanted to impress your VC? Huh.
Fat chance of that now.
Anyway, Wilcox will probably complain, and call off the shadow scheme.
Well, let him.
Suppose Wilcox doesn't cancel it.
If you don't go back, he'll think he's scared you off, won't he? (Bell striking the hour) (Sighs) Turn over.
- Morning, Mr Everthorpe.
- Morning, George.
- Morning, George.
- Morning, gentlemen.
- Morning, Vic.
- Morning, Brian.
I didn't think you'd have the nerve to show your face in this place again.
I'll go away, if you like.
Nothing would please me more.
Why did you come, then? I agreed to come every Wednesday for the rest of term, - and I sincerely wish I hadn't, but I did.
- (Sighs) If you want to cancel the arrangement, that's fine by me.
Get in.
They might send me someone even worse.
As long as one thing is understood.
Everything you see or you hear while you're with me is confidential.
(Robyn) All right.
- Where are we going? - (Vic) Bradford.
A firm called Rawlinson's.
(Robyn) You're going all the way to Bradford and back today? (Vic) Why not? Does this bother you? Yes, it does, actually.
Thank you.
Could we have some music? Help yourself.
One of us is hiding One of us can tell You like Randy Crawford, do you? - No one wants to be - She's all right.
- The first to know - You don't find her a little bland? - No.
Why should I? - Someone has to answer Because someone has to ask But keeping on like this is torture Goin' undecided you know is Haven't you got any classical music? Try the radio.
Someone said that time ( Vivaldi: ( Kiri Te Kanawa (Robyn) Haworth! What? That was a sign to Haworth.
The Brontës.
What are they? The Brontë sisters.
You must have heard of Jane Eyre and Wuthering Heights.
Oh, them.
Women's books, aren't they? Not in the narrow sense.
Of course, they are often read as mere wish-fulfilment romances.
You have to deconstruct them to bring out the political and psychological contradictions inscribed in the text.
Eh? It's hard to explain if you've never read them.
( Kiri Te Kanawa singing Your shadow, eh, Vic? Well, I believe you, thousands wouldn't.
On the medical side, are you, Dr Penrose? - No, I teach English literature.
- Oh, yeah? Now, I like a good book myself, last thing at night.
I'm on The Thorn Birds at the moment.
I'm afraid I haven't read it.
We've had a letter from your purchasing director, Ted.
- Do you know about it? - I think so.
- Well, five per cent is ridiculous.
- If you can't do it, there's others that can.
Who? He knows I can't tell him that.
You know I can't tell you that, Vic.
I could bite the bullet and come down by two per cent on the four bore.
You're wasting your time.
We've been doing business together for a long time, Ted.
That's true, and it's my duty to accept the lowest bid, you know that.
He knows that.
- The quality won't be as good.
- The quality is fine.
It Ah.
You're already sourcing from them? The quality is fine.
Three per cent.
It's my last offer.
I can't go any lower.
Settle for three per cent and I'll tear your arm off.
It's no go, Vic.
Thanks, Ted.
It's all right.
- Bye, then, Ted.
- Bye, Vic.
Goodbye, Dr Penrose.
What was all that about? We supply Rawlinson's with cylinder blocks for their diesel pumps, and I got a letter from them asking for a five per cent cut in our prices.
Well, five per cent is silly.
I mean, prices ought to be going up, not down, what with the price of pig iron.
I wanted to find out what was going on.
- He didn't tell you anything.
- Hah.
I didn't expect him to.
I, er I just wanted to see his expression when I asked him.
- And what did that tell you? - He isn't bluffing.
Somebody really is offering four or five per cent below our prices.
But, more important, they're already supplying Rawlinson's.
Now, with a bit of luck, I can find out who they are.
(Vic) It could be Bullcast.
(Robyn) Who's Bullcast? (Vic) A Rummidge firm, just up the road from us.
They've always supplied Rawlinson's with cylinder heads, while we did the blocks.
The MD is Norman Cole.
An accountant I never trusted accountants.
If he's trying to poach our business, he'll live to regret it.
Why? What will you do? - Attack his customers.
- You mean have them beaten up? (Chuckles) What what do you think we are, the Mafia? No, attack them with lower prices.
Take Bullcast's business away, tit for tat.
I don't see the point of it.
Er, who benefits? The consumer.
At the end of the day, somebody gets a cheaper pump.
Well why not just just put your heads together and make a cheaper pump? What would happen to competition? - You've got to have competition.
- Why? (Sighs) How did you become a university lecturer? By doing better than other people in exams, right? Actually, I'm opposed to competitive examinations.
Yeah.
Having done all right out of them, you can afford to be.
I'll tell you what it reminds me of, your precious competition.
A lot of little dogs squabbling over a bone.
And somebody's stolen your bone, so while they're chewing on it you're going to steal one from them.
( Dvorák: New World Symphony) (Coughs) (Robyn) So, what did you think of the ending? Marion? (Sighs) Well, it's a bit of a cop-out, isn't it? I mean, the will's too convenient.
Oh, yes, I agree.
I mean, it seems as if the only solutions that the Victorian novelist had for the problems of industrial capitalism were a marriage, a legacy, or emigration.
Sometimes all three in the same book.
- Helen, you don't seem convinced.
- (Knock at door) Come in.
(Helen) Well, they had to have a happy ending, didn't they? And what about Villette? I'm sorry to interrupt, Robyn.
There's an outside call for you.
In the office.
- Excuse me for a minute.
- But Villette isn't an industrial novel.
Whereas, in Shirley, which is, in a way, it's got a really unhappy ending.
No, it hasn't.
I don't know what you're talking about.
Robyn Penrose speaking.
It's Bullcast.
- What? - It's Bullcast.
Well, I thought you'd like to know.
I told two of our reps to sit outside Rawlinson's in a car - Listen, I haven't for 48 hours, nearly froze to death - Look, Mr - But they got the name on every wagon - (Mouths) - The likeliest was a Midland firm, GTG.
My transport manager used to work for them, so it didn't take long to find out what they were delivering to Rawlinson's.
Guess what? Four bore cylinder blocks from Bullcast.
Have you dragged me all the way to this phone just to tell me that? Don't you have your own phone? All all our outside lines have been taken away as part of the economy drive.
Furthermore, I was in the middle of a tutorial.
Oh, sorry.
Well, why didn't your secretary tell mine? Well, I haven't got a personal secretary.
We have one secretary between 15 of us, and she isn't in the office at the moment.
- I'm sorry, she didn't say - She's probably in the store room steaming open letters so that we can re-use the envelopes.
- Look - Anything else you'd like to know? Or can I go back to my students? - No, that's all.
- Goodbye.
- Oh, wotcher, Vic.
- Hello, Brian.
Why didn't you tell me you were going to see Ted Stoker last Wednesday? - I'd have come with you.
- I went on the spur of the moment.
Took your shadow with you, though, didn't you? She happened to be with me at the time.
It was her day.
Sounds like it was your day.
You're a dark horse, you are, Vic.
Wotcher, George.
Got the squits again, have you? It's irritable bowel syndrome.
Any road, what's this, er, rumour about Bullcast undercutting us? - It's true.
- The greedy, double-crossing bastards! - You going after 'em? - No.
You're not going to let Norman Cole get away with it, are you? I'll drop a hint that I know what his game is.
I'll let him twist in the wind a bit.
Sounds like we're the ones that are twisting in the wind.
We'd look weak, fighting with Bullcast for the Rawlinson account.
Like little dogs squabbling over a bone.
There's not all that much on the Rawlinson bone, when you come to think about it.
Let Norman Cole have it.
Let him choke on it.
(Sighs) (Beeping) - Stuart Baxter.
- Hello, Stuart.
Vic here.
- Yes, Vic.
- Look, er, I want to let Brian Everthorpe go.
- Why? - He's no good.
He's idle.
He's stuck in old grooves.
He doesn't like me and I don't like him.
Well he's been with the company a long time.
Exactly.
Well, he won't go without a fight.
I'll enjoy that.
I think you should give Brian time to adjust.
- Adjust to what? - To you, Vic, to you.
I suppose you know he had hopes of getting your job? I can't imagine why.
Yes, well, don't do anything hasty.
Hasty? I'll think about it.
Vic, I believe Brian mentioned to you about his idea for a calendar.
Yes, he did.
These should have gone out yesterday.
- He said you weren't keen.
- That's putting it mildly.
It would be a great chance for our Tracey.
A great chance to degrade herself, you mean.
Well, what do you mean? Nude pictures of your own daughter, stuck up on the wall? Well, I don't see the harm.
What about art galleries? You don't get people looking at a picture in an art gallery and saying, "I wouldn't mind going through her on a Saturday night", or taking the picture home to wank off with.
I'm not listening.
I don't know what's got into you.
(Robyn) What's the book like? Not bad.
It's pretty good on the decentering of the subject.
Do you remember that marvellous bit in Lacan? "I think where I am not, therefore I am where I think not.
"I think of what I am wherever I don't think I am thinking.
" Huh.
- Marvellous.
- Mm.
This chap's rather good on that.
Baz, do we have to do this? Oh, come on babes, it'll only take about half an hour or so.
Just relax, smile and look beautiful.
(Doorbell rings) I wonder who that could be.
(Sighs) - Basil! - Hi, Rob.
What are you doing in Rummidge? Just dropped in on the off-chance.
This is Debbie.
- Debbie, my sister, Robyn.
- Hello.
- We're on our way back from Shropshire.
- Go in.
We were at a hunt ball last night.
Hi, Charles.
How's the University of Suffolk? Broke.
How's the city? Booming.
This is Debbie, by the way.
- Oh.
Hello.
- (Robyn) A hunt ball? - Hi.
- (Basil) Mm.
Is this the same young brother whose idea of a good night out used to be listening to a punk band in a room over the pub? Well, we all have to grow up, Rob.
Anyway, I made some useful business contacts.
Yeah, it was a real lark.
'Eld in a sorta castle.
Just like an 'orror film, weren't it? Suits of armour, stuffed animals and everyting.
(Basil) Right.
Charles, why don't you make us some tea? Oh, bossy as ever, sis.
What do you mean? She loves ordering people about, have you noticed? - Nonsense.
- Do you know, when she was only three, she made our Uncle Walter put every penny he had on him into a charity collecting box, by sheer willpower? Poor sod had to hitch home.
He emigrated to Australia shortly afterwards, just to get away from his terrifying niece.
I'm sure nobody is interested in these family memoirs, Basil.
Why don't you help me make some tea? Come on, make yourself useful for once in your life.
(Whispers) Charles, go and look after Debbie.
Well done, Charles.
Is Debbie a secretary in your bank? - Good Lord, no.
- Get the mugs? She's a foreign exchange dealer.
- Earns more than I do.
- Oh.
How much is that? 30,000, excluding bonuses.
- Good God! - Yes.
That's what Daddy said when I told him.
It's more than his professorial salary, apparently.
Considerably more.
There's some milk over there.
In time, of course, I shall earn more than Debbie, but she started earlier because she didn't go to university.
No, I rather thought she didn't.
Not many spot-dealers do, actually.
Debbie left school at 16.
Comes from a family of bookies in the East End.
Are you living together? Well, not literally, we both have our own houses.
Well, it makes sense, the way property prices are going up in London.
There's a tea strainer over there somewhere.
Anyway, we don't have much social life on weekdays.
Debbie's usually at her desk by seven.
- Whatever for? - Oh, does a lot of business with Tokyo.
- (Debbie) Sit at me desk in the morning - And what about you? How's life in the rust-belt? - Rather interesting, actually.
- Oh.
Good department, is it? - Oh, you mean my job? - Mm.
That, I'm afraid, is in jeopardy.
(Charles) No, what is it? (Debbie) Tells you the state of the major currencies, dollar, yen, pounds, marks, any hour of the day or night.
There's nothing on the LCD.
No, that's cos we're outside the range.
50 miles from London.
I been feelin' jittery all weekend, not knowing what the dollar-yen rate is.
- Withdrawal symptoms? - Yep.
I hope you'll like this tea.
- It's called Lapsang Souchong.
- Love it.
(Charles) Very interesting.
- What's that? - It's a Oh, it tells you the state of the world's major currencies, 24 hours a day.
Debbie uses it in her job.
Your job's just a glorified form of gambling, isn't it? - You could say that.
- Oh, Debbie gambles with a stake of ten to 20 million pounds every day of the week.
- Don't you, my sweet? - Yep.
20 million? That's almost the annual budget of my university! Oh, you should see Debbie at work, Charles, it'd open your eyes.
You too, Rob.
A roomful of people with about four telephones in each hand, screaming at each other things like "600 million yen" all day.
- (Debbie) Why not? - I couldn't last half an hour - in Debbie's dealing room.
- I could probably fix it.
- She thrives on it.
- Might be interesting.
(Basil) I don't know how she does it.
It is very interesting.
(Robyn) Not to me, I'm afraid.
- Well, goodbye then, sister mine.
- Bye, Basil.
- Bye, Charles.
- Basil.
- Bye.
- Bye.
"Bond Dealers Do It Back to Back.
" What does that mean? Back to back, it's like a loan made in one currency set against an equal loan in another.
- Oh, I see.
It's a metaphor.
- Eh? - It's also a joke.
- Yes, I see that a joke is intended.
It must pall on people following you down the motorway.
Nobody stays close enough to read it for long.
- Ciao.
- Bye.
Well, what did you think of Debbie? - Rather intriguing.
- Intriguing? Well, so childlike in many ways, but handling those vast amounts of money.
Mummy will consider Debbie what she calls common.
If Basil ever dares to take her home.
You rather gave that impression yourself.
- Me? - You patronised her terribly.
- Oh, rubbish.
- You may not think so, but you did.
Well, what can you talk about to people like that? Basil's just as bad.
In fact, he's become quite obnoxious.
Don't let's ever become rich, Charles.
There's not much danger of that.
(Vic) If you really want to understand how business works, you should be shadowing somebody who runs his own small company, employing, say, 50 people.
(Robyn) Would you rather be doing that? (Vic) Huh.
- I don't know an MD who wouldn't.
- (Robyn) What sort of business? (Vic) Well, Tom Rigby - you know, the, er, general manager of the foundry (Robyn) Uh-huh.
(Vic) Tom and I have an idea for a little gadget, a kind of spectrometer, for giving instant readout of the chemical composition of the molten metal, - straight on to the shop floor.
- (Robyn) Mm-hm.
(Vic) Now, if it worked, it would save having to take samples to the lab for analysis.
Every foundry in the world would be after one.
Nice little business, that would be.
- Why don't you do it, then? - Huh.
Because I have a mortgage, a wife and two idle sons to support.
- It's a bit late, I'm afraid.
- As usual.
- Sorry about that.
- That's all right.
Well, good night.
Erm Come to lunch next Sunday.
Nothing special.
Just the family.
I I've got somebody staying with me, I'm afraid.
Oh, er Well the weekend after, then.
Well, he stays most weekends, actually.
Bring him too.
Right.
One o'clock.
Fine.
(Sighs) (Laughter) (Gasps) (Soft moaning) (Rhythmic gasping) (Moaning continues) Oh, Brian! Oh! Oh, Brian! Brian! Mm! Oh, Brian! Oh! (Gasping continues) (Moaning gets louder) - (Marjorie) Raymond.
- Uh.
- Come on, get up now, Raymond.
- What? (Marjorie) It's five to eight.
It's your signing on day.
(Raymond) Bring us a cup of tea.
(Marjorie) You've got to go.
You'll be late.
- Get up, Raymond.
- Lend us the car, then, Mum? (Marjorie) There's socks everywhere.
Why don't you - Marjorie.
- (Marjorie) What? - Are you going shopping today? - I always do on a Friday.
You know I do.
- Are you going to lend us the car or what? - No, I'm not.
Don't forget that Penrose woman's coming to lunch on Sunday - with her boyfriend.
- I haven't forgotten.
- You know it's your dad's Sunday? - Oh, no.
What's the matter? Not ashamed of him, are you? No, of course not.
It's just that Just what? Oh, never mind.
What are we having, anyway? Well, I thought I'd get a leg of lamb and make an apple crumble.
- Well, what about a starter? - A starter? We never have a starter.
Those things we had at the Rotary dinner.
You know, um - Avocados? - Yeah, get some of them.
- See you later, Mum, all right? - Yeah.
Well, you don't want us to look mean, do you? Oh, man, he's got a wicked car.
Pass the spanner.
- I wish I had a car like that.
- Could do serious damage.
- Flippin' hell.
- It's a joke, innit? - It's wasted on an old geezer like that.
- (Laughter) Bloody hell.
Uh.
Come on.
Why don't you let me put central heating in? Nah, I don't 'old with central 'eating.
It dries up the joints of the furniture.
Got some valuable antiques here, have you? Ah.
It's all good stuff.
Your mother and me bought it from the Co-op when we got married.
Any road, it'd be a waste, putting money in this place.
The street's gone to pot since the coloureds moved in.
You know, you could move into an old peoples flat tomorrow.
- Just say the word.
- Huh.
Flat! I don't 'old with flats.
Nowhere to chuck the tea leaves.
And, Dad, do me a favour, will you? - Lay off the coloureds at lunch today.
- Hm? Lay off the coloureds at lunch today.
My shadow from the university's coming with her boyfriend.
- They might take offence.
- Huh.
Well, I got nothing against the coloureds as such.
I mean, I got coloured neighbours next door.
Charming people.
Stink the place out with curry, mind you.
Do me a favour, Dad, just lay off the subject.
All right, all right.
- Are you going to be much longer? - Yeah, all right.
(Coughs) (Marjorie) Vic! Vic, they're here! (Vic) Yes, all right, I know.
(Marjorie) Well, you go.
I'm busy in the kitchen.
(Vic) I'm going.
- Ah, hello, come in.
- Hello.
- Where's your friend? - Oh, he couldn't come, I'm afraid.
- He's got a streaming cold.
- Oh, what a pity.
Never mind.
Well, just go straight through there, then.
(Vic) Where's Raymond? (Gary) Down the pub, where'd ya think? - Didn't you tell him? - (Whispers) Course I did.
- What's this, then? - Avocado.
It's a starter.
We don't usually have a starter.
Ask your father.
It's his idea.
I thought it would make a change.
All right? - Hm.
- Is it a fruit or a veg, son? - It's more like a vegetable, Dad.
- Oh.
Oh, I think I've seen 'em in the Paki shop on the corner.
All kinds of queer things they eat.
You you put oil and vinegar in the hole and then you eat it with a spoon.
Hm.
(Robyn) Can I pass you the vinaigrette? (Dad) It's a funny sort of taste.
It's like candle grease.
They cost five pounds each, Grandad.
- Five pounds! - Take no notice, Dad.
He's having you at it.
(Mouths) I wouldn't give you 5p for them, to be honest.
They taste much nicer with vinaigrette, Mr Wilcox.
Won't you try some? Um, no thanks, love, no.
Olive oil don't agree with me.
- Gives you the squits, does it, Grandad? - Gary! Aye, it does, lad, ah.
We used to call them the back door trots when I was a lad.
- Because if you didn't get to the lawy in - Yes, we know why, Dad.
- (Sniggering) (Marjorie) Now, come on Gary, just behave, will you, please? Hm.
Do you know they've got four lavs in this house? - Four.
- Have they? Mm.
They've got two upstairs, one in the 'all and one round the back.
I couldn't believe it the first time I come 'ere.
Mm.
Grandad thinks that if we flush them all at once the water table'll go down.
Wait till they start metering the water.
You'll be sorry.
- Excuse me, could we change the subject? - (Giggling) (Dad) Yeah, well, I don't reckon much on this advocaat.
- Oh, this is a nice drop of beer.
- (Raymond) Hello, folks.
(Marjorie) Ah, Raymond.
(Vic) Nice of you to turn up.
- I told you to get back early.
- I had to finish my pint, didn't I? This is Dr Penrose.
This is Raymond.
- Robyn, please.
- All right.
Hi.
What's this, Mum? Trying to get us into the Good Food Guide? (Laughs) What? (Whispers) Shut up, you.
- Hey, Dad.
- Yeah? - Can you lend us 250 quid? - No.
It's to make a demo tape of the band.
I think we're ready.
You mean you've finally worked out how to plug your guitars in? Pow! Shut your blood clart, man.
You get yourself a job before you ask me for any money.
- There are no jobs.
- There are for electrical engineers.
- If you hadn't dropped out - Shut up.
You get on my nerves, talking about that all the time.
I'd better see to the joint.
So you've got your own band? Yeah.
What sort of music do you play? Rock.
What instrument? Lead guitar.
(Sniggering) Isn't anyone else coming for a walk? Ah, no, they're not much for walking.
Dad's asleep in front of the fire, and Marjorie's cleaning up the kitchen.
- I wish she'd let me help wash up.
- Ah, no.
Marjorie's funny like that.
She can't stand another woman in the kitchen.
Gary's watching EastEnders, and Raymond wont go anywhere unless he can borrow his mother's car.
- Does Marjorie work? - No, no.
She gave up her job when we got married.
- What job was that? - Typing pool.
Oh.
(Vic) Look at the way the daffs are coming out.
Nice, aren't they? (Robyn) Mm, lovely.
(Vic) And are those petunias there? (Robyn) Shall we go in here? (Vic) Can anyone? (Robyn) Yes, of course.
It's not GCHQ, you know.
- Not yet, anyway.
- (Vic laughs) (Robyn) I like this place.
It's one of the University's few architectural successes.
(Vic) Yeah.
Very nice.
Too nice for students, if you ask me.
I mean, I never could understand why they had to have these three-star hotels built specially for them.
They've got to live somewhere.
Well they could live at home and go to their local polys, like I did.
But leaving home is part of the experience of going to university.
A very expensive part.
I mean, why should my workers pay taxes to keep these middle-class youths in the style to which they've become accustomed? (Robyn) Well, I agree our intake is too middle-class.
What we need to do is motivate more working-class kids to go to university, and then provide more places.
(Vic) And more landscaped halls of residence with, er, artificial lakes and ducks on them? Well, yes, why not? They enhance the environment.
Universities are the cathedrals of the modern age.
- (Chuckles) - No, really.
The problem is, ordinary people don't know what they're about.
Look at the campus - it's like a graveyard at weekends and vacations, but it should be swarming with local people, doing part-time courses, or going to the library and the sports centre, going to lectures and concerts.
Yeah, well, it's a nice idea, but it wouldn't be long before you had graffiti all over the walls, and the Bunsen burners nicked and the toilets vandalised.
I don't believe that.
I have more faith in people.
Did you notice the, er, bollard smashed up as we came along? - Something's happening to this country.
- Well, yes, it's called unemployment.
It's created an underclass that takes out its resentment in vandalism.
Well, we'll see.
Half an hour.
- OK.
- Just don't be such a wimp.
- I reckon the recession's bottomed out.
- We'll only be five minutes.
- Really? - Yeah.
If I can get a new core-blower coupled to the BMM, and rationalise the machine shop operation, I reckon we'd be in a strong position to take advantage of an upturn in the market next year.
The shop stewards are suspicious, though.
(Robyn) Why? (Vic) Rationalisation is a dirty word to them.
They don't see that without it, the firm could go under.
(Robyn) Well, why not explain it to them, then? (Vic) Talk to the shop stewards? (Robyn) Talk to the whole workforce.
- Educate them.
- (Vic) How do you mean? (Robyn) Well, why not give them a lecture? You're quite a good teacher, you know.
The sound of your heart beating Made it clear suddenly The feeling that I can't go on Is light years away Cos I am your lady And you are my man Whenever you reach for me I'm gonna do all that I can We're heading for something Somewhere I've never been Sometimes I am frightened, About the power of love We're heading for something Somewhere I've never been Sometimes I am frightened, About the power of love