Rap Sh!t (2022) s01e02 Episode Script

1
Why white people getting rich ♪
And my people 'posed to be patient? ♪
Y'all built this whole country
off stolen urban creations ♪
Then wanna replace me with
some cultural appropriation ♪
And watch the Black barbecue
with hopes of initiation ♪
I know, rewriting history,
I'm flipping the page ♪
This the bitch y'all been talking about?
She always look like that?
Y'all don't remember her
from high school?
- We hung out with her.
- Ah, ah, ah.
You hung out with her.
Scary-ass hoe.
I still don't know
who y'all talkin' about.
Her daddy was a teacher.
Her daddy taught math?
So, you remember her daddy?
- I remember everybody's daddy.
- Mm.
And the bitch used to always
think she was so smart.
Every time you go
to say something, she'd,
"well, actually." Girl, get the fuck on!
Hated her.
You still gonna be hanging out with her?
I told you we finna start a rap group.
So you were serious about that?
Yeah.
- And she gonna sound like that?
- Mm.
I don't know. Just be careful, girl.
What's that Maya Angelou quote?
When someone show you
who they are, remember that.
This bitch still quoting poetry.
Bitch, you shoulda seen her
reciting poetry to Bam, bitch.
Wait, how it sounded
when I said it? 'Cause I was drunk.
- Phenomenally.
- My voice wasn't that deep
Y'all, did I miss something?
Jimmy Butler had a party.
- Oh.
- But, before you get mad,
it was a school night,
and you had Melissa.
Yeah, I'm trying to tell you,
Mia, joint custody is really the lick.
Well, that nigga won't even
keep her a whole weekend, so
Well then, you need to
take his ass to court.
Girl, for what? That
nigga ain't got shit.
Ooh! That's true.
Y'all bitches about to make
me break out into hives.
See, that's why I don't
fuck with broke niggas
'cause the risk is, like, too high.
It's astronomical. Like,
a broke nigga have my pussy
like a bag of chips,
just dry, bitch. Like, I
Anyway
We thinking about
going out tomorrow. Come.
I'm supposed to be
meeting up with Shawna.
You gonna ruin it for me!
Ayy, I'm runnin' to the money ♪
You know how I'm coming,
Monday to Sunday night ♪
Be thumbin', thumbin', thumbin' ♪
Got this bad bitch with a onion ♪
And she got her own money ♪
Yo, another check again ♪
I be killing shit,
Lord forgive me for my sins ♪
Hey, I tried to warn y'all niggas, man!
I tried to warn y'all fuck niggas,
but you didn't listen, and now
you're playing catch-up, okay?
I know this nigga
didn't buy a new watch.
Hold on, listen! Listen!
Bitch nigga.
What's good, man? It's your boy Lamont.
Y'all niggas know what the fuck it is.
I'm probably out here
getting some money,
so I'm not gonna answer this message
Ladies, if he's driving a Rolls Royce,
don't give it up unless you see
the license and registration.
And if he got a AP on his wrist,
and you don't see a headboard
or a box-spring in sight,
run!
Okay? Do not pass go,
do not collect $200, okay?
Because that's all the bitch got!
Bitch.
Hi. This is Kayla
from Superstar Kids Learning Center.
There was an incident between Melissa
and another student,
and Ms. Kandi asked me
to set up a conference
tomorrow to discuss.
Please give us a call back.
Break time is over.
Oh! Hey, boo!
- Happy belated. Did you see my text?
- No.
No, not yet. I got in
- late last night.
- Don't even worry about it.
- How was your dinner?
- It was It was nice. Yeah. You know,
we went up to this cute little
Thai spot in Hell's Kitchen,
took some edibles. It was cute.
Girl, did you get as fucked up
as you got at the A3C birthday?
You mean when you had us take a shot
every time we saw
a nigga in a Gucci belt?
Absolutely not!
So, I don't wanna bother you,
but the freestyle is
just going crazy right now.
Yeah. Yeah, I saw.
That was really different.
I know, right? It was different,
- but it has 80,000 views.
- So, now you in a group?
Shawna, what happened to taking a break?
I was. I was gonna do that.
I really was,
but I just reconnected
with an old friend,
and it just happened so organically.
And Mia's dope. Like,
she has so much engagement.
People are finally gonna hear my music.
In the meantime, I just need to
get people to know that it's us.
Yeah. Just, you know,
get them to credit you.
No, I did that. I did that.
I was just thinking, like,
maybe if you reposted it,
it could get some more eyes on it,
maybe even some people at Spotify.
Do you have anything else
for them to see
- if they look you up?
- No, not yet.
- But, we're gonna be recording tonight!
- Okay.
- Well, I will see what I can do.
- Wait, really?!
You will?! Oh, my god. Girl!
Ooh! Okay. Thank you so much, Jill.
- Thank you in advance.
- I got to go. I love you.
Okay. Bye, bye, bye, bye.
- Shawna called you, too?
- And text me! Girl!
Now she in a rap group?
What is happening?
I really do not know
what she thinks I can do.
Hello! Ms. Spotify!
- Hook it up.
- You know I wanna help her,
but I can't just call in
favors from my friends.
Plus, this is my career, too,
and I don't think that
Shawna even respects that.
- Mm-hmm.
- Plus, I'm not promoting her
if there's nothing to follow up with.
- Well, you need to tell her that.
- Girl, I tried.
- Shawna don't listen to nothin'.
- But her own music.
For real? She is
- all over the place.
- Girl.
Sometimes you gotta support from afar.
But look, I got to go, girl.
- Lulu's shitting all over the place.
- Gross.
How am I supposed to aim at
three of them at the same time, bro?
Bro, where's my team?! Oh my god.
This shit getting me hot. Come on, bro.
- Oh shit. Yo, peep, man.
- Seduce and scheme!
- Hold on. What?
- Look, bro!
Wait, hold on. Is that Shawna?
That is Shawna! She finally took
that stupid-ass Wakanda mask off.
That shit was trash.
And hello, Double-D's! Who are you, bro?
Let me see, let me see.
Whoa, wait a minute.
Why you looking at her like that, nigga?
I know that I know them cleavages.
What?
That's it! Right there!
Uh, the Ghetto Dominatrix!
- Right there, bro.
- What?
I told you. I know my cleavages.
Look. She's, like,
this retired stripper.
Know what I'm sayin'?
She got, like, this, like,
left cheek, right cheek thing going on.
Wow. You really pay for OnlyFans.
Hey, Cliffany!
Yo, Cliff. You ain't tell us
that your girl Shawna
was in a rap group
with a porn star, bruh.
What the
How you gonna be a senator,
and your girl is up in here
rapping about gagging dick?
Wait, no.
We can't do that, though.
Like, we in a new era of women.
- Shawna does not have to be Michelle.
- I'm sorry.
We gonna let her be Melania.
Fuck y'all.
Be quiet! I'm on the phone!
- The hell wrong with her?
- Took her iPad.
She cutting up enough people at school.
Now I gotta go up there tomorrow!
Told you God was gonna get you back.
If I had a dollar for every time
I had to go up to that
goddamn school Hoo!
'Cause
them teachers ain't care about me.
They was just trying
to get me outta there.
That's 'cause yo ass was bad as shit.
Mia, your mama was the same way.
Shut the hell up, Teisha. No, I wasn't.
Look, I forgot to tell you!
I seen Lamont at the Publix
the other night. Girl, he skinny!
Please, Mama, I-I don't
wanna talk about him.
- Man, you need some dick in your life.
- Mm!
You need to get up out that house,
go somewhere and act like
you still in your 20s, girl!
Shit! Like, listen.
Girl, don't you let that baby treat you
- like you can't live your best life.
- Right.
- Go out, lock the door behind you.
- She can't do that.
I actually am doing
something with my life.
I'm doing something new.
That's why I called you.
I wanted to know if you could
watch Melissa for me tonight.
Yeah, alright. But look, Mia,
make sure you feed her before
you bring her to my house.
That little girl can eat.
She eat like a grown-ass woman, Teisha,
- I'm telling you!
- Bye, Ma.
Ta-da!
Welcome to the studio.
- Yup. Yup. Here it is.
- Oh shit!
- Yeah, baby.
- My girl got a studio!
- How?
- Be careful.
Everything is really
poorly constructed. Okay.
This is Lauryn, as in Hill.
She's the holy grail of microphones,
and I got her for us to record on.
- Did you steal this?
- Steal?
No. W-why are
Girl, I'm just playin'!
This shit is nice! What is th
Please be gentle. Yeah.
Excuse me. What is this?
It's a pop filter. It's for
It takes out like the pop sounds
when you say p-words.
P-P.
- Pop that pussy!
- Yup. Do it again.
P-P-P-P-P-P-Pop that pussy!
Eh! Peter Piper picked a pussy!
Okay, so I was working on
our song last night, and
I don't know, I feel like
I've breathed new life into it.
- Yeah? Yeah.
- You wanna hear it? Okay.
One second. Okay. Let me get it going.
Studied every goddamn day, you bitch ♪
You wanna learn, you gotta
goddamn pay, you bitch ♪
You thought Bernie
could save you, hoe ♪
Pay back all them dollars
I gave you, hoe ♪
Don't forget this is a business ♪
Keep praying for that forgiveness ♪
20 years before you finish,
and then boom ♪
I hit you with that interest ♪
But getting an education's
the American dream ♪
And I'm that bitch Sallie Mae ♪
Now I seduce and scheme,
seduce and scheme ♪
Come in with the hook
right there! You say,
"Seduce and scheme.
"Seduce."
- Is you rapping about student loans?
- As.
Technically, I'm rapping
as the student loans.
Why would I want our song
to be about debt?
Everybody's affected by
predatory lending.
People are really going to feel this.
Of all creeds.
Uh
Turn the camera off.
T-turn the cam-camera off.
Bitch, is you serious?
- Okay. Alright.
- You serious.
You serious.
You don't like it?
Like, okay. That's fine.
What do you wanna rap about?
'Cause I'm open to suggestions.
Fun bitch shit! You know,
like Something fun.
Something for the summertime.
Something for the girls
to get ready and party to.
You know.
You know what'll help?
Let's do this. Here.
What, you want me to
write down some lyrics?
No, not lyrics. I could do that.
Just give me, like, topics, ideas,
the shit that you wanna rap about.
Try to think of things
that have double meanings.
Allegories, metaphors You know.
Fast cars
Money?
Fast cars, money
Fast cars, money.
Yeah, I'm just trying to figure
out what that would sound like.
Fast cars, money.
'Cause I wanna make something
that's relevant to people's lives,
but it's gotta feel artful,
too. Like, new.
- Yeah?
- On the vanguard-type shit, you know?
Okay.
He my ex like Malcolm
Got my friends, and we sharin' a Benz
'Cause socialism.
Um Where your bathroom at?
It's right there.
Mm
Very scary. Rosa Parks.
Rosa Parks.
She need to be remembered.
Run, bitch!
H-how do you say. "run, bitch!"
- Like, go! Goddamn!
- Mm! Run!
Run, bitch!
- That's crazy!
- That's crazy.
Hey, Mia.
Where'd you go? You just disappeared.
Oh. I was gonna say
maybe we could just
- come back tomorrow.
- What? No. No, no, no.
We gotta record this today.
Girl, I'm not trying to get done
like The Renegade Girl.
Girl, one day ain't
gonna make a difference.
What? She say one day
not gonna make a difference.
- Exactly. Girl this
- Hey.
I'll be back. Tell her I'll be back.
Look, Mia.
Do you know how long it's been
since I've posted something
and anybody gave a fuck about it?
This kind of support
is really hard to get.
Girl, you sound like my baby daddy.
- I don't like that.
- It's real!
Girl, people are sharing
our video left and right.
We don't want to lose
the momentum that we have.
Okay, but I actually do need to go.
I got some shit to take care of.
I got real responsibilities.
Girl, I got a whole child.
Rent due, and I need
to make some money. So,
no disrespect,
but I don't got no
time to be wasting, so
Okay, fine. Drive safe.
Fuck you mean, "drive safe"?
Fuck you mean, "drive safe"?
Drive safely!
Like I don't drive safe no other time?
- No
- What's up?
- It's just an
- Oh.
Hey, you hungry?
Do you wanna cook us
something to blow off steam?
I tore up my whole
closet trying to make a studio for us.
I spent all my money
on a new microphone,
and she came and shit
on everything! Fuck.
You spent money on a new mic?
Yeah. Yeah. I was pretty sure
I told you that.
No, you didn't, but noted.
I just feel like I can never
get on the same page with her.
You know what I mean? Like
I don't know. I haven't done
a collab like this
- since you know who.
- Yeah, but
I thought the whole point
of your music was to,
- like, say something meaningful.
- It is.
Then what are you doing? You know,
once, once you sing
with a girl like that,
you know that's how people
are gonna see you, right?
Okay, yeah, and you know I'm the one
that asked her to be in a group with me.
She has a really loyal following.
Yeah 'cause she does porn.
What are you talking about?
She doesn't do porn.
I saw her OnlyFans, Shawna,
and it is basically porn.
Okay. And?
And I'm trying to look
after your future.
I don't like how
you're talking right now.
This is the opposite of
everything you stand for.
Am I wrong?
Look, you can either keep working hard
to make the music you believe in,
or give in to this industry bullshit.
She a little freak, and she know it ♪
And she know it, p-p-pussy popping ♪
You know she ain't scared to
show it, scared to show it ♪
Drop it low, bust it
open, scrub the floor ♪
Scrub the floor, sh-she
a bad bitch and she know it ♪
Freak-a-leek, freek-a-leek ♪
Hey, Warren.
Where you calling from?
I'm in New York City.
What are you wearing?
Wow. I'm speechless.
Mm. You hard?
Show me.
Mm. Big.
Rub it for me now.
I am at work, surrounded by glass.
What you calling for?
You got money to waste?
You in Central Park?
Uh, no. That's just a-a regular park.
Mm
You've never been to New York?
I'm a Miami bitch.
I think that you'd love it.
And a woman like you
should be traveling the world.
I know. I need a man to spoil me.
Hm. You should let me do that.
Mm. Maybe.
Until next time.
Alright, alright, alright.
Let the garbage be in the garbage can.
And let the future begin.
Chastity and
- Okay.
- Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
My people be the masses
they harass and assassinate ♪
- Hey!
- Balling like basketballs
- Call me a basket case
- Okay!
I stand behind my bars
like killers and robbers ♪
Mobbing like mobsters,
my plate full of lobster ♪
Yo, yo, yo! Tell 'em why we celebrating!
21 Savage hopped on your boy's beat!
Hey, but Shawna Shawna's
up next though. Shawna's up next.
Yes, ma'am!
Here's to making big deals
and signing my first artist.
The one, the only, Vision!
You not about that action, tap in ♪
It's passion that's lacking ♪
I tell that bitch tap in ♪
Francois, can you run that back?
No, I think we good, Shawna. You got it.
Okay, I was thinking
on the second verse,
there's like an ad-lib
opportunity where
Shawna! Do you know who that is?
- Glossy Tae.
- Right,
and I think she knows how to rap,
- so let her do that.
- Yeah.
Yeah. Uh, for sure. Here.
Good luck, girl. You got it.
No, not good luck.
You're talented. Okay.
Yo, that's Glossy Tae. Ms. GT herself!
They get bitter when they see
you living your dreams.
Especially when they ain't got
none of they motherfucking own.
But fuck that! We vibe!
Can't believe you got me doing this.
Hey. I'm, uh, sorry I couldn't be there.
Trying to finish up this track at work.
Well, as you know, uh,
we had a little incident
during reading time.
Melissa told a student
that she would drag them to space
if they didn't shut the hell up.
And I wonder where
she could get that from.
She said the student was being loud,
and she just wanted to learn.
- I'm so sorry.
- I've noticed
Melissa often has big reactions
to things we call "size one problems."
If a pencil breaks or if someone
steps on her toe by accident,
that's a size one issue.
It shouldn't result in
a big burst of anger.
Yeah, it-it shouldn't.
I don't know what to say.
Well, I wouldn't be too alarmed,
but I think taking the time
to help her talk through
her feelings could go a long way.
Word. Yeah, we can do that. Definitely.
Absolutely.
It won't happen again.
I can promise you that.
It's just something to work on.
Academically, Melissa is doing great.
She is such a leader.
She told me she wants to
be an astronaut, hence
dragging that poor baby to space.
She said a astronaut?
Dang, my baby smart, boy.
I printed out some reading
materials for you to take home,
and there is this great space
camp I found. Look at this.
If you sign up now, it's half the price.
Drag her to space? Yo.
That shit cold.
I can't even be mad at that.
Could you imagine what
I could've been doing
if I had teachers like her
who actually gave a fuck
about they students? Like, I
I would have been
a completely different person.
Wait, why are you past-tensing yourself?
Because
all your life, you got niggas
trying to label you.
- You start to believe that shit.
- Shit, I know! What was it?
"If he ain't got no headboard,
girl, then
"he ain't shit probably,
and you shouldn't have
no babies with him."
Man. Wasn't nobody
even talkin' about you.
Aight. Hey, look,
speaking of, look there.
Don't trip. You just on pause.
I ain't hang up.
My placement came through.
I'ma send you a little bit on top,
just 'cause I'm cute like that.
Wait!
That music money hit different, huh?
Yeah, I told you!
It pay off to dream big.
That small shit don't work no more.
- Damn. Got my attention.
- Mm.
- So, you gonna unblock me now?
- No.
Dang!
- Alright.
- Bye!
Want some, you ain't want some ♪
Want some, you gotta want some ♪
Why these bitches staring
at me like they want some? ♪
Here you go. Elevator's
just around the corner.
- Thank you.
- Thank you.
Hey.
- What's up?
- Um
I have, like, 10 minutes
before I'm officially done,
and it's gonna take
Dorothy forever to relieve me.
- I can hang out at the bar.
- Okay.
Yeah, it's over there,
around the corner
Hi.
- How can I help you?
- She already been helped.
I'm just doing my job. Hi. I'm Maurice.
I'm the concierge here, which
means I got everything you need.
Mm. Is that right?
Well
H-how you gonna help somebody
from over here? Your desk over there.
Just gimme a sec. Why are you
- Mia, girl, I'll meet you at the bar.
- What are you doing?
What are you doing?
Listen, I was gonna invite you
to the beach with us,
and now I'm rethinking it.
She's so damn thick.
I just wanna get behind her
- You really got a type, huh?
- Yes! Okay?
I like what I like.
Why are you sex-shaming me?
Get outta here, please.
Basic disgusting-ass nigga.
- Just like that? Wow. Wow.
- Bye, nigga. Oh. No, ma'am, not you.
- Thank you, Esther.
- Thank you.
So, um
whatever happened to the producer nigga
you was working with?
I was watching some of y'all videos.
That boy's a clown.
I'm not even worried about him.
Mm. I mean, we ain't gotta
talk about it if you don't want to.
Okay, I was working
on my album with him,
and
suddenly, like, all these other artists
wanted to start working with him. So,
the resources at the time
all started going to them.
And then when I confronted him about it,
he told me we needed
to rethink my whole image.
I don't know. So,
somewhere along the line,
he stopped believing in me.
Mm-hmm. Y'all was
on two different pages.
I guess. Yeah.
So, I wanted to talk about
what our vision gonna be.
Yeah. Okay. Um
Whatever we do, I just want
I really want niggas to think.
Girl, if a nigga wanted NPR,
they'd go get NPR.
Like, whatever it is,
it just gotta be fun and sexy,
in your face, you know?
Okay. It can be fun and sexy.
It can be all those things,
but I'm not about to play
dress-up for niggas on the internet.
- Girl, you wear masks.
- That's different!
My art is not for the male gaze.
Girl, what the gay niggas
got to do with it?
No! Like, male gaze.
Like patriarchy shit.
- Niggas be watching what we do.
- I don't get it.
What's so wrong with
having niggas looking at you?
Okay, girl. Let me follow the formula.
Get my body done, make
a song about it, and boom.
People start caring about my music.
Is that what you think is going on?
Girl, we in the middle
of a bad bitch renaissance.
No! We not because
everybody looks the same!
There's nothing unique about it!
And the shit is not new either.
Biggie did this shit to Lil' Kim.
He made her this side chick,
then he tossed her.
Big Fendi did this shit
to Nicki. It goes on and on.
Girl, I don't know that nigga.
When I look at Nicki,
I see a talented, fly bitch.
Look, I'm not taking nothin' from her.
I'm not saying she's not
a talented, fly bitch,
but every single female rapper's success
is tied to some nigga
that wants to fuck them.
- I know that's right.
- Thank you, Esther!
Esther, stay outta this one. Girl,
Kim was a woman's fantasy.
She said the shit
that girls wanted to say.
Okay, maybe Kim did, but right now,
there's no woman
really, really doing that.
They're just puppets! They don't
even write their own shit, Mia!
It be another nigga in
the back giving 'em bars!
So, you telling me
there is no possible way
that women could be having
a good time and winning?
How I see it, you lettin'
these niggas control you!
Yeah. And you so concerned
about making art for them,
they got you in a hoodie
and a fuckin' mask.
Bitch, we in Miami. It's hot as fuck.
We got the opportunity to do
what the fuck we want to do,
with no niggas controlling this.
Loosen up.
Let's just have some
fun, see where it goes.
- Okay, you wanna try this again?
- Yes! That's what I'm talking about!
- Sure?
- Yeah.
Okay.
Shit. Put that on my shit.
Put respect on my shit.
Direct deposit.
Double D's, I direct deposit.
I need it now,
put respect on my shit ♪
Bad bitch, living
rent free in his pockets ♪
Landlord pussy,
I collect the profits ♪
Bad bitch, living
rent free in his pockets ♪
Okay, go in there,
I'll play the beat for you,
just roll in there and do some ad-libs.
Body that lit,
I can't take no bad pics ♪
Got the keys from
that nigga like Khaled ♪
Let me fix this for you,
with your tiny ass.
Take a nigga's soul,
put his body in a casket ♪
How much money, baby? Skip the foreplay.
He a felon, beat it like a cold case ♪
Whoa, whoa!
And he thinkin' I'm a
dick 'cause I curved y'all ♪
If I want a nigga, bitch,
I make a bird call ♪
Caw!
-You were right! I I feel empowered.
-You feel empowered.
- Yes.
- I feel like a bad bitch spirit,
like, just took over me.
So, now we're going to do your verse.
Okay, I wanna say something like this.
Okay, we can work with this.
Classy, I'm a real bitch, but
I'm nasty, ride the dick good ♪
Then I ask where the cash be,
actually, yeah I got bank ♪
And do you think I give a fuck
what you think? And I know ♪
- Okay, cool. I can lay it down for you.
- Nope, I got it.
Broke nigga, please,
if you ain't got what I need ♪
Tell a rich nigga slide
'cause them broke niggas weak ♪
You got it!
- You like it?
- You so good!
I'm dead! I'm weak! I'm dead!
Okay, let's run it back.
Got my name in it, go insane in it ♪
Say this pussy too wild,
no taming it ♪
Like hahahaha ♪
If he ain't got change, if he do ♪
Go straight to the bank with it ♪
I'ma spend ♪
And scream ♪
Seduce and scheme ♪
Hey.
Hello?
Oh fuck.
You gonna rap for me?
No, but I am gonna perform for you.
- Do you wanna watch?
- Yes, yes, yeah. Very much so.
I take it lightly ♪
Oh shit.
Till you fall away ♪
But I need it nightly ♪
- I'm a little nervous.
- You're so sexy.
I fucking miss you.
I fucking miss you.
Will you come around? ♪
Before it's too late? ♪
Oh my god.
I miss you fucking me.
I fucking miss fucking you.
I just wanna make you feel good, baby.
I fucking miss the way you taste.
I'm gonna make you cum, baby.
Oh. Cum with me.
Oh my god!
Oh fuck.
Shit.
You know I love you, right?
I love you, too.
I shouldn't have come at you earlier.
I just
I got in my head
about the whole Mia thing
and y'all being in a group and just
Sometimes, I feel disconnected
from you and, like
I know that things have been
really difficult between us.
You're busy with school and
I'm doing anything
to make music work for me.
I know it's hard.
I just wish we were with each other.
Yeah.
I'm still down to look for apartments.
You know, just to see.
Yeah, yeah. I want I want to.
I'm just worried about, like,
coming to New York
and getting too comfortable.
I don't wanna just lean on you.
Don't worry about that.
Hey, everything's gonna work out.