She-Hulk: Attorney at Law (2022) s01e02 Episode Script

It's true. I am a Hulk.
Let me get you up to speed.
Look out!
What happened to me?
Jen, I'm sorry,
but my blood got into your system.
So I turn into a Hulk now, too.
We have to make sure of your
ability to regulate your emotions,
especially your anger.
Fine. Teach me how to Hulk.
So I'm clearly nailing
it at all these things,
and I'm happy to now
get back to my life.
Whether you like it or
not, you're now a superhero.
The idea of being a superhero
is not appealing to me.
And that's how it all happened.
I was right and Bruce was wrong.
And I never have to be a Hulk.
You need to do your thing.
Right now? In front of everybody?
Who the hell are you?
Jennifer Walters, attorney at law.
the aftermath of this chaos,
a new superhero appears responsible
for stopping the rampage
Sketches show a stunning scene from
the Metropolitan Courthouse today,
where superpowered influencer Titania
caused panic while fleeing traffic court.
In the aftermath of the chaos,
a new superhero appears responsible
for stopping the rampage.
And she's been identified as Deputy
District Attorney Jennifer Walters.
Members of the jury are
calling the green woman
a hero who saved lives.
We go live now to an eyewitness.
Can you tell us about what you saw today?
Yeah, yeah, yeah. So this chick,
pretty decent,
turned into a Hulk, like a chick-Hulk.
A She-Hulk?
Exactly.
She-Hulk! She-Hulk! She-Hulk!
That's for you.
No. No.
That's for somebody called She-Hulk,
which can't be what they're calling me.
Lady-Hulk, Girl-Hulk, She-Hulk
Come on, just give them what they want.
She-Hulk! She-Hulk! She-Hulk!
That name better not stick.
It's so dumb.
I can't even exist without
being a derivative of the Hulk.
That's a pretty dumb name, too.
Mmm-hmm.
Neat little trick you
pulled there, Walters.
But isn't it unsportsmanlike
to suddenly debut superpowers just
to drum up publicity for yourself?
Only you would think that.
Seriously, how did you get powers?
I don't feel like talking about it.
Nepotism. I knew it.
Ugh. Take a lap, Dennis.
There's a hot chick over
there. I'm gonna go talk to it.
Some guy gave me these drinks for
free because you're a superhero.
Ugh! I'm not.
No, I did not go to law school and
rack up six figures in student loans
to become a vigilante.
That is for billionaires
and narcissists,
and adult orphans, for some reason.
But you could be an Avenger.
Do the Avengers offer healthcare?
- I think
- Maternity leave, a pension.
Are they even paid?
Here's the thing, though.
Hulk Jen is a total snack.
- Right?
- Jen, can I talk to you for a moment?
Of course, sir. What is it?
Could you, uh, go back to Jen-Jen?
This is a serious conversation.
Oh. Sure.
Oh!
- Are you okay?
- Yeah.
Yeah, different metabolism.
I'm listening, sir.
We didn't win the case.
- Oh, yeah, we did.
- No.
GLK and H had it declared a
mistrial because you as your
What She-Hulk
That is not what I call it. Me.
I don't have a better name
yet, but that's not it.
Okay, well, just the same.
Since you saved the lives
of the entire jury today,
GLK and H argued that the jury
was then biased in your favor.
What was I supposed to do?
Like, let them get hit
in their faces with a desk
and then they have trauma,
and they're bleeding out
all over the courtroom
No, you did the right thing,
but it unraveled our case.
- I'm sorry, Jen.
- Oh.
I'm sorry, too, boss.
No, Jen, I'm sorry.
I have to let you go.
This makes you a liability
for the DA's office.
Wait.
Wait, you're firing me?
This is Jen. Leave a message.
Hey, Fuzzball, just checkin' in on you.
I'm here if you wanna
talk a little bit more.
No gloating this time, I promise.
Maybe a little.
We can't hire a lawyer
who is such a big distraction in court.
We're not prepared to offer
you the position at this time.
Sorry, it's a no.
We just can't take the risk of a sideshow.
No, you can't work here.
They don't have good snacks.
Mmm. Here, GG and T might be hiring.
Uh-huh.
- Jen.
- What?
Jen, what are you doing? Eye on the prize.
Come on. Seriously.
Sorry. I'm sad and lonely.
Jen.
No.
What? Fired again?
- No.
- Sorry.
- Family dinner right after I get fired.
- Sorry.
Please, please, please, come with me.
Can't. I have a date.
I'll never forgive you for this.
Mom, Dad, I'm here.
- Hiya, sweetheart.
- Hi.
- Yeah. There you go.
- A pie.
You shouldn't have.
You know, this much sugar is very
bad for you and your waistline.
Jen, you don't have to
worry about getting fired.
I already told everyone,
so it won't be awkward.
No one is going to bring it up.
- Hi, everybody.
- Hi, Jen.
You got fired.
- Ched!
- Ched!
You said to bring it up.
I said don't bring it up.
- Why would I tell you to bring it up?
- Sorry, Uncle Mel.
She already feels like complete crud.
It's okay, Dad.
I, yes, got fired, but it's fine.
Big news. So I got promoted to
manager over at the Best Buy.
Manager? All right, Ched.
Employed and promoted.
Oh! Jen, there is the nicest young man
who works at the coffee shop
that I go to. His name is Yusuf.
- Do not set me up.
- No, he's much too young for you.
No. He wants to be a superhero,
and I told him that my
daughter was a superhero.
He hadn't heard of you.
But I gave him your number so
that he could call you for advice.
Please stop giving my
number out to strangers.
Uh, Jen, that Hawkeye guy,
what happens to those arrows of his?
I mean, does he go around and
collect them when he's done
- Jenny.
- Nobody calls me that.
I'll just put this out there.
Melanie is a stylist. You know?
She could help you.
- Let's get this hair more like She-Hulk's.
- Mmm-hmm.
So back to Hawkeye.
It's pretty hazardous to leave
those things lying around.
Add some chunky highlights,
some chunky lowlights?
Bruce is actually the one who
saved billions of people
- with the snap of his fingers.
- Now, Jen,
there's a couple of things I could
use your help with before you go.
What do you need me to do, Dad?
That was just an excuse
to check in with you.
How you doin', kiddo?
- I'm okay.
- Really?
No, I'm not okay. But I'm
okay with not being okay.
- Uh-huh.
- Because it just sucks.
You know, like I thought
I could keep this at bay
for I don't know how long.
- Eternity?
- Well
But it's just like, I hate that
it got revealed in this way,
like, in front of the whole world.
But I wasn't gonna let
those people get hurt.
- No.
- What kind of person would that make me?
I'm being punished for
doing the right thing.
I get fired for saving people,
and now I can't get
another job because of it.
You didn't tell me.
What were those years
of law school even for?
Well
Maybe I should've just let
those people get smooshed.
Sweetheart, sweetheart,
sweetheart, it's gonna be okay.
This isn't even the first time we've had
to deal with a Hulk in the family.
And you didn't destroy a city.
It does feel like a
weight has been lifted.
But there's, like, this new weight.
The thing that you
were dreading happened.
But look, you're still standing.
And now you get to keep moving on.
You want another one, Jen?
No, I'm ballin' on a budget now.
Thanks, Pedro.
Miss Walters? It's nice to see you again.
Mr. Holliway?
May I buy you a drink?
Uh Sure. I guess.
Can I help you?
I'd like to offer you a job.
- Is this a joke?
- I never joke.
Miss Walters, you laid out
a winning case against us.
Before I had it declared
a mistrial, of course.
It's no easy feat against GLK and H.
So, I would like you
to come work for us.
You got me fired, and
now you wanna hire me?
To be head of a new division, yes.
- Take some time to think it
- I accept.
But I will only do it
if I can hire my own paralegal.
Non-negotiable.
I truly do not care
who your paralegal is.
Yes.
You start Monday.
Uh Okay. Yeah.
Pedro, Jen Walters is back, baby.
Welcome, Miss Walters.
We are thrilled to
have you join the team.
I'm so happy to be here.
It is an exciting time at GLK and H.
More and more eccentric superhumans
are coming out of the woodwork.
We just started a
Superhuman Law Division,
and I want you, well, the
She-Hulk, to be the face of it.
Oh.
Uh, that means I'll expect you to be
at work and in court as the She-Hulk.
Not as a normal person.
- Right now?
- Mmm-hmm.
- Um, well
- Terrific.
This way, please.
We are the first top-tier law firm
to launch an entire division
dedicated to superhuman law.
Oh, my God. Is this why they hired me?
Okay, this sucks.
I am totally qualified, but now
everyone around here will always think
this is the only reason that
I got the job. It's so unfair.
I should be able to enjoy the fact that
I got an amazing new job, and I can't.
These dodos never had to deal
with this on their first day at work.
But I'm curious
What do you you think about it?
I'm, uh,
a bit agnostic.
Interesting.
Unprecedented, for sure.
Huh.
I'll spend the rest of the year
worrying about what I just said.
Ah, here we are. Your office.
I'll leave you to settle in.
Okay.
Why are you in Hulk
form? That is a look.
I just found out, the
only reason they hired me
is because they wanted a Hulk lawyer
in the Superhuman Law Division.
Yes, but look at everything
it's getting us. Are you kidding?
Big-ass windows, yes.
A fully stocked mini fridge.
And a desk.
I mean, this is normal. But
this is a very fancy desk.
I'll have to buy an entirely new
wardrobe just to come to work.
Yeah. And you're making
enough money to do that now.
Knock-knock.
Hi, there. I'm Pug. I'm also
in the Superhuman Law Division.
Oh, I'm Jennifer Walters.
I made you guys a welcome basket.
Oh!
It's got some office supplies
to get you started. Snacks.
And a map to the best
bathroom for pooping.
- Thank you.
- Thank you.
So, uh, let Carrington go,
and then, um, tell Bob Thompson
that he's going to Minneapolis,
because he hates the
cold. Just tell him that.
Mr. Holliway, I'm so excited to be here.
I can't wait to take on whatever
case you want to assign to me, but
Your first case is the
parole of Emil Blonsky.
Oh.
Also known as Abomination,
Mr. Blonsky has been
serving his sentence
in an ultra-high security prison
I'm very familiar with Mr. Blonsky, sir.
So you know there's a lot of controversy
surrounding his possible release.
This is extremely high profile.
The publicity alone is worth GLK
and H taking this on pro bono.
I'm sorry, but I can't
represent him, sir.
I have a serious conflict of interest.
This man tried to kill my cousin Bruce.
Yeah, that's quite all right.
Mr. Blonsky is well aware
of your familial connection
and has signed a conflict waiver.
He would like to retain you
specifically as his attorney.
I have to say I'm not
comfortable taking this case.
I would much prefer to be assigned
literally any other case at this firm.
If you don't take the case,
then you don't have a job here.
At the very least, you should meet
with the client before you decide.
Whoa, whoa, whoa.
You can't come in like
that. No superpowers inside.
Oh!
Walk through.
When you enter the visitor's
safe area of the cell,
do not step past the yellow line.
Do not touch the glass separating
you and the prisoner, Abomination.
Although we have taken every precaution,
we cannot guarantee your safety.
- Do you accept these conditions?
- Yes.
Sign here.
In the event of injury or death,
please indicate who we should notify.
It's that bad, huh?
Never let your guard down.
The prisoner is a very dangerous man.
Is he gonna serve me up with some
fava beans and then a nice chian
Ma'am, this is a prison.
Of course.
Jennifer Walters.
Well,
first off, namaste.
Mr. Blonsky, I was expecting
- Abomination, right?
- Yes.
Yeah, well
Oh, God.
- Sorry about that.
- No, I'm cool.
No, you won't be seeing
much of him about.
Honestly, I've completely
transformed myself,
you know, physically, obviously,
but also spiritually.
Does that mean that you can't turn into
the Abomination anymore, or you won't?
No, no, it means that I choose not to.
I'm simply Emil now.
Russian born, British raised,
Royal Marines commando,
on loan to the US government.
Okay.
With seven soulmates that I met
through the prison pen pal program
that I want to start a new life with.
- Wow.
- So,
let's talk about the elephant
in the room, shall we?
Your cousin.
- The Hulk.
- My cousin, Bruce.
Semantics. He was the Hulk, wasn't he?
You know, I tried to kill him, you know.
So let's get that out of the way.
It wasn't personal or anything. So
I was under direct orders
from your government.
But then you went on a
destructive rampage in Harlem.
That wasn't sanctioned
by the government.
Yeah, because they pumped me
full of that Super Soldier Serum.
The serum the government gave you
caused your subsequent actions?
I was a highly decorated soldier.
You know, I was sent on a
mission to take out a threat,
and I thought I was
the good guy, you know?
I thought I was gonna be, you know
Captain bloody America
or something, you know?
And now, that very threat, your cousin,
is held up as some kind of
hero, and I'm locked up in here.
Where's the justice in that, Jen?
I understand your point.
But the parole board's
gonna need to know
that you feel remorse for your actions
to even consider release.
Absolutely, I do, you see.
And I have here,
- uh, various haikus I've written
- Oh, boy.
to each of my victims
expressing the sorrow.
- You don't
- If you'd like to experience them.
That's okay, I get
"My tiny ears hear, so"
If I were your attorney,
I would advise you to
speak truthfully, from the heart,
instead of trying to gauge what
you think they might wanna hear.
That's all from the heart, Jen.
Look, I just wanna
move on with my life,
live in peace on a
large piece of property
purchased for me by my seven soulmates.
Right.
Think you can help?
Yeah, I'll think about it.
Miss Walters. Yes, this is Holden Holliway.
I expect to hear your
decision by the end of today.
Hey, Jen, what's up?
Bruce, hey. Um, listen, I got a new job.
Hey, congratulations. That's fantastic.
Yeah. But,
part of the deal is, I have to
take on Emil Blonsky as a client.
And I couldn't do that
without talking to you first.
- Okay
- It doesn't seem like you hold a grudge,
at least you've never
talked about that before.
- That's
- And you're always saying that
you know, everybody
deserves a second chance.
- I think you've
- And I'm not falling for an act here,
but Blonsky did seem to have
really good arguments, you know?
- Yeah
- He was so compelling.
And maybe I wanna believe
that he's reformed, you know?
Isn't rehabilitation something
we should strive for as a society?
- That's
- But none of that matters
- if you don't feel comfortable with it.
- Jen.
You're calling me to tell
me you're taking the job.
I'm calling you to tell
you I'm taking the job, yes.
That's great, Jen, you should.
Actually, Blonsky wrote me a
really nice letter a while back,
and a really heartfelt haiku.
So we put everything behind us.
That fight was so many years ago,
I'm a completely different person now.
Literally.
Ha-ha.
So you're sure you're
okay with it? Really?
Yeah, I'm okay with it.
Sounds like you're okay with it,
too. It's a big step into the world.
It's not easy going public.
What'd they end up naming you, anyway?
She-Hulk.
Don't even.
No, I love that.
That's got a nice ring to it.
She-Hulk, Attorney at Law.
Ugh. I mean, there are, like,
some strings attached that
I'm not so happy about.
It's gonna be a lot to navigate.
It all worked out. You got this.
Just be careful, okay?
Yeah, yeah, I'll be careful.
You coming to LA anytime soon?
Yeah, probably not for a minute.
I got some things I gotta take care of.
Okay. Phone call over, I guess.
Ah. There you are.
- Hello.
- Mr. Holliway,
uh, I'd like to accept your offer.
That's good to hear, Miss Walters.
So this means you're
taking Blonsky's case?
Absolutely. All personal
complications have been resolved.
And I guarantee you,
you're getting my best work.
I've already got a winning
strategy and it is 100% in the bag.
Glad to hear it.
You might wanna take a
look at the news right now.
Yes.
- Have a good evening, Miss Walters.
- Uh, have a good evening, sir.
So far there have been no statements
made by Emil Blonsky's attorney
after shocking footage leaked
showing the Abomination
participating in what appears
to be an underground fight club
after having somehow
escaped from prison.
Oh. That sucks.
I don't know what 4K is.
Here's the thing, nobody does.
But you still need it.
I don't know what I'm doing
down here, I'll be honest.
I've turned it left, turned it right.
- Counterclockwise.
- The wheel just turns.
I don't know what we're doing.
- Okay, drop it down. There. Good.
- Okay.
- Do not touch these wires again.
- No.
I could've done that.
There you go. Yeah,
watch out for the lamp.
Yeah? Good, good. Come on
up. Come on. There you go.
I'm glad you're staying hydrated, Dad,
but this is a bit excessive.
Oh! Here, I got that. Let
me get that. Yeah. Okay.