The New Scooby-Doo Movies (1972) s01e02 Episode Script

Today, Scooby-Doo
meets Batman and Robin.
The lights have gone out.
Oh, wow, now we'll never get
to the Mystery Club convention on time.
That bump just disconnected
a battery cable.
l can fix it in a jiffy.
Yikes!
That pilot may be in trouble.
Let's find out.
Look at that!
Something's fishy.
A plane without lights making a delivery
in the middle of the night?
Out here?
l think we may have
a mystery on our hands.
Yeah. Let's cut through those trees
and see where they're heading.
Shaggy.
There goes the truck.
But without the big crate.
There goes the plane.
The wooden crate. They left it here.
That's funny,
it's strapped to the floor.
Everybody hide.
Scooby-Doo, where are you?
Hiding.
Oh, l'd better hide too.
l'd better get something
to defend myself, just in case.
Stuck.
Yipes! Like, everything's nailed
to the floor.
lt's Batman and Robin.
Batman and Robin?
What are you doing here?
Robin and l were on routine
Bat-patrol in Gotham City.
When we detected an airplane overhead
flying without lights.
Suspecting someone smuggling
contraband into the country. . .
. . .we followed the plane
on our Batmobile radar.
And it led us to this old farmhouse.
Now, let's have a look at that crate.
lt's strapped to the floor.
Well, we'll just unstrap it, eh, Batman?
Right, chum.
Someone's upstairs. Lights out.
Scatter.
Who's down there?
Yeah, like, we hoped
this house was deserted.
l'm Mrs. Baker.
Are you people in trouble?
Can l help you?
Perhaps. Can you tell us
what's in that crate?
Oh, goodness.
l never saw it before.
How did it get there?
We saw two men bring it in.
-Two men? Here? Oh, dear.
-Don't be frightened. We'll protect you.
Yeah, like, they'll protect you.
Let's just open this,
and see what's in it.
Holy harlequins.
Why, it's just a punch clown.
An amusing toy.
Okay, put them up.
Watch it, Scoob.
Oh, a wise guy.
Oh, Scooby,
you broke his head off.
Zoinks! Like, never mind the head.
Look at the bread.
Just as l suspected, counterfeit.
A masterpiece of duplication,
except for one tiny slip-up.
What's that, Batman?
President Lincoln never
wore a turtleneck sweater.
Wow, phony money!
Yes. Probably printed in a foreign country
and flown into the United States.
-But why did they deliver it here?
-Like yourself, young man. . .
. . .they too must have thought
this old house was deserted.
Oh, dear me.
l believe one of those two men
was the pilot. . .
. . .and the other man
drove off in the truck.
-Yeah, probably to stash it somewhere.
-Right.
Let's look for fresh tire tracks.
Here, Batman, jeep tracks.
Holy retreads.
They're heading away from the highway.
The criminal may have driven it
to the auto junkyard just down the road.
A perfect place to hide
an incriminating vehicle.
-But you kids can identify it, right?
-Right, Batman.
lt's next to the old cemetery.
Some folks say
the spirits of the departed. . .
. . .wander around
the auto graveyard at night.
That won't stop us, right?
Wrong.
Well, this is the place, all right.
He must be here somewhere.
You kids wait here for us.
-This criminal may be dangerous.
-Dangerous?
Batman, Robin, look.
Fresh footprints.
But they stop here.
Climbed over the cars.
Whoever he is, he's a sly old fox.
We may be able to flush
this fox out of hiding. . .
-. . .if we can borrow your dog.
-Who, me?
You want Scooby to follow his trail?
Sure, Batman.
Don't worry, Scooby, we'll be right here.
Thanks a lot.
Like, l think Scooby lost the scent.
The man must have walked
through this puddle.
-A shrewd move. But we'll find him.
-What's that?
The concrete compressing pit.
When the crane
drops an auto in there. . .
. . .powerful walls compress
the steel into a cube.
What you're sitting on may
once have been a four-door sedan.
Wow, talk about compact cars.
Dark down there.
An excellent hiding place.
l'll attach my Bat-light
to the top of the crane, Batman.
That should light up this entire area.
Good idea, Robin. l'll search the pit.
What's that?
Just an old headlight.
Aren't you ashamed of yourself?
-Look, somebody's climbing up the crane.
-lt could be the man we're after.
Let's find the caped crusaders
and warn them. Come on!
Come on, Scoob, no more false alarms.
You're letting your imagination
play tricks on you.
There's nothing out there except
a sneaky little guy with a black hood. . .
. . .and gleaming green eyes and--
Goodbye, Scoob!
Holy sky hooks, it's moving!
l told you someone was up there.
Cool it, Daphne.
That someone is the Boy Wonder.
What are they trying to do?
Beats me. Looks like they're gonna
pick up that old jalopy. But why?
Batman, danger! Get out!
Great Scott!
Someone's in that car.
My Bat-line.
Quick, slide down the Bat-line!
Say, if Robin is up there. . .
. . .and Batman's here. . . .
Holy hoodwinks, it's Fred!
Fred, what happened?
The moment l entered the cab,
someone threw a hood over me.
The next thing l knew, Batman
and Robin were trying to pull me apart.
Sorry, l thought you were the villain.
He must have escaped through the other
door. We can't do more here.
Let's go back,
pick up the phony money. . .
. . .and deliver it to Chief O'Hara
in Gotham City.
The house is this way, Batman.
To the right.
Creepers!
Hey, like, what happened
to the farmhouse?
lt's gone.
Holy Houdini. How can
a whole house disappear like that?
Fred, are you sure we
didn't make a wrong turn?
Positive. When we walked here from
the highway, we passed this tree here.
-The house was right over there.
-That's right.
The front porch
was about 20 yards ahead.
Amazing. Absolutely mind-boggling.
There must be an explanation.
Robin, this could be a case
of group hypnosis.
Was there really a house?
-Was there actually a Mrs. Baker?
-Yeah.
-l think.
-Or was it all some kind of dream?
lt was no dream.
Wherever that house went,
your Batmobile went with it.
-lt was parked right in front of the porch.
-She's right, Batman. lt's gone.
That my friends, is our lucky break.
Yeah. Like, huh?
The Batmobile has a tracking bleeper.
We often have to leave
the car in a hurry.
lf anyone steals it, we have
a receiver in the Batcave. . .
. . .that can pinpoint the location
of the Batmobile.
Very likely, it will also give us
the location of the counterfeiters.
We'd be glad to give you a lift
to the Batcave.
Well, no offense, but--
We know,
its location must be kept secret.
We don't mind being blindfolded.
Yeah, let's get out of here.
Batman, like, when we get to
the Batcave, could l get a little snack?
Yes, Shaggy, we'll all have a snack.
Bat-milk and cookies for everyone.
Bat-milk?
Dynamic trio!
No, Scooby, we are not
the dynamic trio.
Hold it, Scoob.
This is our Batmobile tracking device.
As soon as it warms up, a blip will
appear showing where the Batmobile is.
Wow, far out.
This cookie sure looks like a real bat.
Look, Scoob.
lt's a cookie.
Hey, there it is!
Look, the Batmobile is moving
into the Gotham City Amusement Park.
So it is, chum. lt's slowing down.
-lt's stopping in front of--
-The Batman and Robin exhibit building.
Why would they bring
your automobile there?
The thief knows the easily recognized
Batmobile would be a very hot item.
He's disposing of it
where no one would ever suspect.
People will think
it's just another exhibit.
-Well, let's go get them.
-Right.
Blindfolds on.
To the Mystery Machine.
-Come on, Shag and Scooby!
-Hey, like, l didn't finish my snack.
l guess l did.
Looks like it's all right.
l think we'd all better look for clues.
Cover this entire area.
-Right
-Yeah.
l'll get my flashlight.
Batman, Scoob and l,
we're not very good clue finders.
Could we, like, wait in the Batmobile?
Certainly, but don't touch any
of the instruments.
Oh, no.
Like, step on it, Caped Crusader,
or that villain is going to lose us.
Scooby, look!
Like, look!
-Batman!
-Robin!
Hang on, we're coming.
Holy double dealers! The Joker
and the Penguin, they've teamed up.
Do you think Joker and Penguin
are behind this funny-money racket?
Sure. That punch clown was
practically the Joker's calling card.
Whatever they're up to,
the haunted house is their headquarters.
l am afraid this is a job
for professionals.
Joker and Penguin are master criminals.
They can be dangerous.
Robin and l will handle this part
of the caper.
Don't worry, we'll nab them.
You kids stay here.
They're inside.
We've got them, Penguin.
The crucial question, Joker,
is do we have them, or do they have us?
Erase your doubts,
my web-footed friend.
This time, the Joker
will have the last laugh.
How did the dynamic duo discover
we were passing counterfeit money?
What difference does it make now?
By a sheer stroke of luck. . .
. . .Bat-brain and the Boy Blunder
have walked right into our hands. . .
. . .hunting for us.
While they hunt, we haunt.
First, a few moans,
groans and assorted screams.
-What's that?
-Merely sound effects. . .
. . .recorded on tape by talented,
professional thespians.
Holy spine-tinglers,
they sure sound convincing.
Why the raucous outburst of mirth,
you babbling buffoon?
They're not falling for your
hokey haunting howls.
ln that case,
my fine feathered friend. . .
. . .l shall achieve my goal
with a white-sheeted ghoul.
Stay loose, Robin.
This is nothing more than an ordinary
bed sheet, a cheap one at that.
Now, let's keep moving.
This passageway must lead somewhere.
Yes, Batman and Brat Boy. . .
. . .it leads somewhere,
to your doom.
Now, pengy-wengy. . .
. . .watch me lure them
into the room of doom.
Robin, look, a door.
-lt's locked.
-l wonder what's in there.
Wonder no more, Bat-fools.
l am in this room, the Joker. . .
. . .the clown prince of crime.
Joker, if you don't come out,
we're breaking down this door.
While you're breaking down,
l'm breaking up.
Get it? Of course you don't.
Just as you'll never get me.
We'll see about that, you cackling crook.
Shall we, Batman?
One, two, three!
Holy pitfalls!
Thank you so much, gentlemen,
for dropping in.
Well, Penguin,
l told you we'd get them.
Our Bat-lines. We'll climb out.
No, Robin, the walls and ceiling
are absolutely smooth.
There's nothing for our hooks
to grab onto, not even a doorknob.
-We're trapped here for a little while.
-Yes.
For a little while.
Forever. Farewell, caped cuckoo birds.
Our pit is full. How pitiful.
Let's get the funny money
and make our lives sunny.
Plenty of time for that,
my rakish rogue.
l wanna keep my beady eyes
on Batman's bevy. . .
. . .of budding birdbrains.
Good idea, Penguin. . .
. . .but l doubt those kids
will give us trouble.
l have a feeling Batman
and Robin are in trouble.
-l think we ought to look for them.
-Right. Let's go.
Shaggy, Scooby, come on.
l'd love to, but l can't,
on account of my allergy.
l'm allergic to ghosts. They make me
break out in goose bumps.
Yeah, me too.
Scooby, will you come
if l give you a Scooby Snack?
Two Scooby Snacks?
-Well. . . .
-Three?
Okay.
Okay, gang, let's go.
Those foolhardy fledglings are
actually entering our edifying edifice.
They're in.
-Fun time?
-Fun time.
First, l'll split the group
with the moving wall. . .
. . .then l'll split my sides,
laughing at their confusion.
-l just thought of something.
-What?
Like, how come
you get the Scooby Snacks. . .
. . .and l wind up in this spook shack?
Well, they better get, like,
some Shaggy snacks from now on.
l think it's time
to treat our intrepid teenagers. . .
. . .to some ghastly groans and moans.
And l'll bombard those bumpkins
with abominable apparitions.
Grisly gargoyles. . .
. . .ghastly ghouls, floating objects. . .
. . .bubbling pools, wailing witches,
vanishing doors. . .
. . .hideous rooms with moving floors.
-What was that?
-l don't know.
Velma, you better hold my hand.
Wow, you really must be scared, Velma.
Your hands feel so clammy.
So does yours, Daph.
Hey, wait a minute.
A masterpiece of morbid mirth, Joker.
l doff my topper to you.
Ah, exit. l told you l'd get you
out of here, Scoob.
Like, trust me, pal.
They're about to enter.
Throw the switch.
lt says, ''This way out. ''
Hey, wow, this is a long walk
for such a short room.
-Walk faster.
-Right.
l think we're getting closer to that door.
Stay with me, Scoob.
-l'm tired.
-l'm tired too.
Let's rest.
Scooby-Doo, where are you?
Right here!
Hey, Scoob, don't run away
from me like that.
l'm not going anyplace.
Yoinks! No wonder
you're not going anyplace.
Like, we're not moving,
but the floor is.
-What happened?
-Never mind.
Like, let's split
this scene while we can.
l don't like this place.
Like, l'm not crazy about it myself.
We got them on the run.
That's what l call a ''running gag. ''
Like, okay, l've got the door open.
Stop running.
Okay.
Where'd he go?
Like, help!
Scooby, like, it's solid, l think.
Look!
Yeah, at least somebody's
been here before.
l think l heard voices up ahead.
Maybe we've caught up
with Velma. Come on.
They're all in the same passageway,
coming together.
This should be interesting.
Zoinks!
Those look like real mean eyes.
See you later.
lt's okay, Scooby.
lt's just Freddy and Daphne.
Oh, boy.
Yeah, Scoob, it's just us.
Come out, come out,
wherever you are.
-A real ghost!
-Sorry, Daphne, cowards first.
That's not a ghost.
Ghost? Ghost?
Yikes!
Scooby, is that you?
-No.
-Scooby. . .
. . .why the disguise?
Where are the others?
Drat! Our ingenious devices failed
to scare them off.
Relax, my bird-beaked buddy.
When they see two living skeletons
chasing them. . .
. .they'll move their bones faster
than we can move ours.
We'll have them out of this building
in two shakes of a leg bone.
Hold it, gang.
More mechanical junk.
Kid stuff.
Well, these can actually walk and talk.
Yeah. Either they're real people, or--
Hey, like, couldn't we discuss this
someplace else?
Yeah. Bye!
Velma, we both know those
aren't real skeletons, right?
-Right.
-But just in case they are. . . .
Right!
Don't be silly.
lf you'd just listen a minute--
Delicious-looking bones.
-A door.
-lnside, quick.
-Holy vertebrae, we've got visitors.
-Yes, Robin.
And l think when we remove
these costumes. . .
. . .we'll find a couple of boneheads.
Oh, drat.
Scooby, bring your friends to get us out.
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Watch it, Robin, he broke free.
How amusing.
The Clown Prince of Crime is now
the Crown Prince of Climb.
l'll go get them.
Yes, we passed the phony bills at
the various rides and refreshment stands.
-lt was so easy, we couldn't resist.
-Even though you knew. . .
. . .it was against the law
to pass illegal tender?
-What's that?
-Counterfeit money.
-Where did you have this money printed?
-My dear lad, we didn't have it printed.
lt was given to us
by an anonymous benefactor.
-What?
-Someone telephoned us last week. . .
. . .told us to leave some real cash
under our doormat.
After that, every morning,
on our doorstep. . .
. . .there was a crate with a clown in it.
Full of phony fives and tens.
-What about the vanishing house?
-The what?
The farmhouse that really isn't there.
You young jackanapes, l'm the one
who's supposed to make the jokes.
Do you know who Mrs. Baker is?
l know who Mrs. Baker is.
That creature's mother.
Corny.
Robin, l think they're telling the truth.
Those two only passed the phony cash.
Holy enigmas. Then who smuggled it
into the country, the Riddler?
That's a riddle we'll have to solve later.
For your part in this crime, you two
will spend a long time behind bars.
-Not again.
-These men are Gotham City detectives.
When Robin and l were trapped,
we summoned them with our Bat-radio.
Gentlemen, you may take them away.
Right, right.
Hold it. He meant the other way around.
Fellow crime fighters, the brain
of this operation is still on the loose.
And we haven't one single clue
to his identity.
Whoever he is,
he has Mrs. Baker with him.
That poor, sweet old lady.
-l wonder. . . .
-What is it, Freddy?
l wonder if there's a clue in the fact
that all of Mrs. Baker's furniture. . .
-. . .was nailed to the floor.
-Hold it, chum.
Furniture nailed to the floor.
Maybe she did it in case
of an earthquake.
There can only be one reason why
that furniture was nailed to the floor.
Right. And we're going back there. . .
. . .to see if we can make
that vanished house un-vanish.
Robin, to the Batmobile.
Kids, to the Mystery Machine.
Holy hallucinations.
lt's back.
The house is back.
Then we weren't dreaming after all.
Looks like Mrs. Baker is up there.
Maybe it's not Mrs. Baker, Shaggy.
-Maybe it's the man we're looking for.
-Yeah. l'd like to find who's up there.
And what gives with this kooky house.
We will. We mustn't let him or them
slip out of our hands again.
Robin and l will enter the front,
go up the stairs.
We'll enter through the kitchen
and cover the back stairs.
lf we see anything suspicious,
Scooby will bark to you.
-That won't work.
-Why not, Shag?
Like, Scooby and l won't be there.
Like, we're not going into any house
that might vanish while we're in it.
No way.
-We'll stay out here and watch the cars.
-Actually, a good idea. Let's go, kids.
l hope they'll be back soon.
Shaggy was right.
Everything's nailed to the floor.
Yes.
And now let's have a look-see upstairs.
We've got to find the back stairs.
An iron hinge, and pulley ropes inside.
Wow, Mother Nature goofed on this one.
Look. Look!
-Holy cement mixers. What happened?
-Just hang on, Robin.
When the room is upside down,
we can drop to the floor. l mean, ceiling.
-What's happening?
-Beats me.
This is worse than the haunted house.
So that's how it's done.
Like, wow.
Like, how?
lt disappears when you pull
this branch down.
Let's see what's outside.
Walking on the ceiling is kind of weird,
eh, Batman?
Yes, it is, Robin.
Whoever was in the house
escaped through that tunnel.
You know, l always get a weird feeling
when l stand on a ceiling.
Now you know how a housefly feels.
And l'll feel better away from under
that big, heavy stove.
Scooby, l mean, like, we've got to bring
our friends back.
Help me.
Batman, it's rotating again.
We'll be sealed in. Come on.
Too late.
Hey, what's happening?
Here we go again.
Jeepers. l've heard of revolving doors,
but a revolving house?
Scoob, they don't know anything
about this tree.
Let's tell them.
Batman, that must control the rotation.
Whoever's doing this to us
is sadly unbalanced.
He's not the only one.
Batman. Like, we found out
what makes the house move.
-So did we.
-Are you kids all right?
Yes, now that we're out
of this mixing machine.
That's our man.
After him!
Robin, you stay here with them
while l check this out.
He's up here somewhere.
Come on, l'll give you a hand.
Okay. Come on, follow me.
And above all, move quietly.
-Keep that dog quiet.
-Shaggy, tell Scooby to stop that.
Hey, Scoob, will you stop already.
This is a hound who can't take a hint.
Well, that ought to do it.
-lt's not Scooby.
-Ah, a toy dog, no doubt.
That indicates that the perpetrator
is here.
Sorry, Scoob.
Piles of crates up ahead, could be risky.
Wait here while Robin and l scout
that area.
Stay together.
Don't let anything separate you.
Look at that.
Scramble!
My glasses.
Yikes!
Look out!
Help!
Thank you, Boy Wonder.
Scooby-Doo.
Scooby-Doo, where are you?
Here l am.
Where?
Like, help! Get me out of here!
Somebody! Anybody!
Jinkies!
Scooby-dooby-doo!
Woe is me.
Look, the hooded man.
We'll never catch him.
He's on a unicycle.
What we need is wheels. Follow me.
He's not in the next aisle. See anything?
Not a thing.
Wait. There he is, on a unicycle.
Let's go.
Oh, boy. Feet, do your duty.
Scooby-dooby-doo.
Where am l?
Get along, little doggy.
-Holy basketballs. That's two points.
-And game.
Before the cops come
take him away. . .
. . .make him tell us
what happened to Mrs. Baker.
Yes, that dear, sweet, old lady.
The poor woman was just
an innocent bystander in all this.
She simply vanished.
-Well?
-You fools. Mrs. Baker didn't vanish.
She's been here all the time.
Mrs. Baker!
Then you were the counterfeiter.
And l still would be,
if it weren't for that dumb dog.
-What did l do?
-You're the hero of this piece, Scooby.
-l am?
-Sure.
You captured Penguin and the Joker. . .
. . .and now you got Mrs. Baker.
You're A-okay with us, Scooby.
Scooby-Doo!
We don't have any Scooby Snacks.
But how about some Bat-snacks
as a reward?
Scooby-dooby-doo!
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