The No.1 Ladies Detective Agency (2008) s01e02 Episode Script
Poison
Sorry, mma.
Tell Dr.
Gulubane at once! Dr.
Gulubane, it's the same exactly the same.
And look at the time.
That's impossible.
I think, Dr.
Sibenke, it would be best for everyone if you stayed away.
- Dumela, mma.
- Dumela, mma.
Is this all you've brought me for the charity sale? Ah, never mind! Taja! Put it in the room.
Thank you.
Hey, go on.
That's Tabitha teaching the boys rugby.
Motholeli, please ask Mamale for a glass of water for Mma Ramotswe.
Does she need any help? No no no no no, she likes to do things herself.
Both parents passed away and her bones are badly damaged by tuberculosis.
It's a very sad story.
Those pieces are too small to sell.
They'll make good covers for the toilet.
Give it to Maratep.
I'm very disappointed in Mr.
Patel.
He has so many shops and all they send us are those carpet off-cuts.
Mma, Larona broke the glass! Tell her not to pick it up! I won't be a moment.
Larona! Mma Potokwane suggested that I talk to you.
She says that you are a lady detective.
Ee, mma.
That is true.
Are you in need of some detecting? Ahh tell me, if someone is very frightened, and they live in fear of their life all day and all night, could you find out why? Who is this frightened person? It is my father.
His name is Rre Lisindi.
He he owns the curio shop at African Mall.
I know it.
I've bought things from there.
He's an honest man.
And all his life he has been a happy man too.
But now he he cannot even sleep; he can hardly talk.
And when I ask him what's the problem, he says there are things I must not know or I'll get into danger.
Danger? Did he use that word? Ee, mma that very word.
So you want me to find out what is troubling your father.
But I do not have enough mon Don't worry about money.
I will do what I can.
Take this.
It has my number on it.
"The #1 Ladies' Detective Agency"? Ee, mma.
I like it.
Oh.
Oh oh ahh! Snake! Snake! Snake! It's a mamba.
If this snake had bitten you, mma, you would be one dead detective.
- Ahh! - Ha ha! Stop fooling around! Put it in a bag and throw it away.
And then come back and clean the car.
I feel quite sick to think what could have happened.
Oh, don't be upset.
I was about to deal with it myself when a passerby appeared and gave me a tow.
You're so cool about it.
I've lived 38 years and never come so close to death.
L I thought you were 37? Yes.
Well, but tomorrow is my birthday.
- Tomorrow? - Yes.
- Congratulations! - Thank you.
- Are you celebrating? - No no no.
I'm past all that.
Everybody should celebrate the day of their birth.
Let me take you out to dinner.
No, that's not necessary.
- Please.
- That would be nice.
Thank you, mma.
That's a beautiful car.
Who taught you to make a car like that? No one.
No one at all? God.
What do you know about God? He is invisible.
Wellington, I've told you before, you may sit quietly outside but you must not disturb the clients.
He is not disturbing me.
I have a son his age at home.
I'm sorry I'm late.
It's been a very difficult morning.
A snake was in the van.
Dr.
Sibenke? Ee.
That is me.
Please, come into my office, Doctor.
What kind of snake? A mamba.
Don't worry I killed it.
Bush tea, I think.
So your family still lives in Zimbabwe? Ee, they do.
Of course I miss them every minute.
But I had to leave just to earn enough money to support them.
It's very sad what has happened there.
Ahh, it is more than sad.
But let us not dwell on these matters.
Mmm.
I was lucky enough to receive a post at the hospital working under Dr.
Gulubane.
Dr.
Gulubane? - He's a fine man and a good doctor too.
- He is.
But then something unfortunate happened.
The very week that I started work, a patient of mine died of no apparent cause on a Friday afternoon and at 2:00.
That is not unusual in a hospital.
Well there's more.
The following Friday there was another unexplained death at 2:00.
Then this last Friday the same thing happened again.
People look at me strangely now.
They don't want to talk to me; - they avoid me.
- Chh.
They feel that somebody should get the blame for these deaths.
I am a foreigner and a refugee.
It's understandable.
What are you looking for? I don't want to be recognized by Tabitha's father.
I've been to his shop before.
Ee.
Do these make any difference? Nnyaa, mma, no difference at all.
Well, not a big disguise.
I just don't want to be identified.
Well, I can't do anything about your distinctive figure.
There is nothing distinctive about my figure.
What about my hair? Well, I can make it longer so that it covers your face like a yak.
No, certainly not.
Then what am I going to do? He's already seen your face.
Mmm.
I know have you got any time today? Oh, no.
No no no no no.
You are not suggesting that I go.
Why not? It's very simple.
Find a birthday present for JLB.
And then what? While you're there, look around.
Look on the desk; look on the shelves.
Look around for what? For whatever he does not want you to see.
- Bah! - That's what's frightening him.
Excuse me, sir? Can I help you? I'm sorry? Yes, you can certainly help me.
I'm looking whoo.
I'm looking for a gift for a very good friend of mine and that's why I'm in your shop.
Take a look around.
Mmm.
Ooh, rre, this is pretty! You have a very good eye, rre.
There's only one village where they make those.
Good.
And what is that? Excuse me I must take this.
Lisindi Curios.
L I can't talk to you now.
I have a customer.
Okay.
Sir? Sir? Sir! Rre? Eh eh eh! This is my storeroom.
It is private.
Now, please, come out at once.
At once.
- Please.
- Please forgive me.
I thought it was just another way out.
Rre, we forgot the gift.
There is something in that storeroom.
- How do you know? - It's obvious! It's like when a bald man tries to hide his baldness by pushing his hair over like wet grass.
And then what do you see when you look at him? Huh? Baldness and a man underneath it.
I need to get into that storeroom.
I'll do it tonight.
Where will you sleep tonight? I don't know.
How would it be if you had a proper place to live? Like what? It doesn't matter what it's called.
You'd have regular food and a bed and school lessons too.
If Mma Ramotswe and I knew of a place like that, would you like to live there? Hup! Wellington? I'm sorry I'm late.
- Do we really have to do this? - No one will know.
We'll just take a quick look around and then we'll go.
Please give me the keys.
When we open the door, we must run as fast as we can to the buttons that turn off the alarm.
Ah shhh! Give me the code.
Shut the door.
Shut the door, shut the door.
Turn on the torch! Not at my face here! Well, that wasn't too difficult.
Give me that.
Something ran over my foot.
Hold this.
These tusks are fresh.
You can almost smell the animal they belonged to.
I'm afraid your father has got mixed up with ivory smugglers.
That's why he's so frightened.
Quick, put everything back the way it was.
No one must know we were here.
Hurry! Hurry! Let's go, let's go.
Oh! Turn the light off.
Turn the light off.
- Where are the keys? - I thought you had them.
I left them on top of the alarm.
Let's go, let's go.
Thank goodness.
That was getting on my nerves.
Ahh, let's go.
- What do we do now? - Run! - What? - Run! Take the keys.
I'll go get the car.
Charlie? Fanwell? These boys will be the death of me.
What time is it now? 8:30.
"From a disgruntled customer.
" Thank you, boys.
I'm very touched.
The tie is colorful.
Aha! But you shouldn't have wasted your money on the aftershave.
I'm quite happy smelling of Sunlight soap.
Ah, but, boss, women prefer smart-smelling men.
And that is the path to heavenly pleasure.
No no no.
You broke in? It was a legitimate search for evidence.
What if Rre Lisindi finds out that it was you? He'll tell the ivory smugglers and they'Il There's no way he can find out.
Shouldn't we tell the police? No.
I don't want to do that.
I want to solve this case myself.
In fact, I don't even want to tell them when I've solved it.
Why not? The only reason I took this case was because I wanted to give that young girl some peace of mind.
I don't think putting her father behind bars is a very good way of doing that.
But he's broken the law.
Rre Lisindi doesn't feel like a bad man to me.
If he's involved in a crime, it's because bad people have forced him into it.
- But - No more talking without tea.
We must talk about these mysterious deaths.
Do you really not know what's causing them? No.
After the first one, we took every precaution possible.
But it happened again twice.
Unfortunately, yes.
This is the ward.
Did all three patients die in the same bed? Yes, it was this bed right here.
We've changed the beds around, of course.
Maybe there's something wrong with one of the machines.
They've all been checked and tested.
We've even changed them around with ventilators from other wards.
Look, I have nothing to hide, but this is a medical problem.
Why don't you leave it for the hospital authorities to solve? I can't stand by while an innocent man's life is being ruined.
Just let me try something.
I'll come back on Friday.
I'll sit in this ward at 2:00 and then see what happens.
Mma Ramotswe, may I trouble you for your services? I'd be happy to help you, but I'm on my way to a meeting.
You can make an appointment with my secretary.
I'd prefer not to wait.
It's a family matter.
My card.
So what kind of family matter might this be? I'm a businessman here in the city, but my family owns a large farm north of Pilane and 6,000 head of cattle.
My father got married when he was young.
I'm the offspring of that union.
Then some years later he married again.
So your mother was late.
Nnyaa, mma.
She's still alive.
My father is one of those old-fashioned men who believes that two wives are better than one.
Oh.
His second wife had another son - Jobe, who is, I'm sorry to say, the fool of the family.
Mmm, those are harsh words.
How else can one describe a young man who fails at everything that he puts his hand to? Well, Jobe got married this year.
Then the trouble began.
What kind of trouble? One evening after dinner everyone in the family suffered a violent stomach complaint.
My mother lost no time in telling me her suspicions.
Oh, she believes Jobe's wife poisoned them all.
How did you guess? Were her suspicions correct? All I know is that now both wives are convinced that Mafela is the poisoner.
She phoned me this morning, begging for my help.
She requested a lady detective - and so I'm here.
- Mmm.
So you want me to question your family? Not question, no.
My father is a frail old man who has lost his sight.
It will distress him.
Just say that you are my private assistant who needs a holiday and then discreetly see what you can find out.
Well, Rre Makgothi, I am pleased to say I can take your case.
My fee my fee will be one thousand pula.
Thank you.
Enjoy it, miss.
Thank you.
So are you going to open it? What is it? It's a surprise.
It's perfect.
Ha! How did you know? Ha ha! - L l - I collect them percussion instruments.
I once had a dream that I'd be the greatest drummer in the world.
But now I just collect them.
- It's - Yes.
Where did you find it not at Rre Lisindi's shop? Yes, as a matter of fact.
You didn't steal it? No! Certainly not.
Promise me that you'll never again do such a crazy escapade.
Ahh, I did get a little carried away.
Is that a promise? I suppose so.
Mmm.
Mma Makutsi thinks I should tell the police.
Well, you know what happens if you do.
The little shopkeeper gets punished and the big guys at the top of the heap go scot-free.
You're right.
They are the ones who should be punished.
No, the people who run the ivory trade are more dangerous than any mamba.
If threatened, they'll strike to kill.
A woman in their world is like a fragile ship on a stormy sea, or an antelope in a desert full of lions.
It's been a very long time since someone compared me to an antelope.
If you'd only allow me to put a supportive arm around you Oh, JLB.
You are a kind and good man, and a very loyal friend.
But I don't need a supportive arm.
I really don't.
I don't think that girl is poisoning anyone.
There was a young woman in my village who was accused of being a poisoner, but it was only because her mother-in-law hated her.
Mmm, that happens in every village.
But I want you to be safe.
You must not eat any food at all unless everyone else is eating it too.
I don't want my first case as a detective to be investigating your death.
I hope you're not implying I starve myself.
Hmm! Dumela, mma.
Let me carry your suitcase.
You are expected.
Please, come in.
You must meet the big mma first.
She's waiting for you on the stoop.
Dumela, mma.
Dumela.
I am glad you are here.
Come and sit beside me.
Doralene, make sure our visitor's room is ready.
So you're my son's personal assistant? Yes, that is so.
I expected you to be skinny a skinny woman.
He does not like traditional shapes, my son.
Hmm.
Don't worry, mma.
I am not one of those girls who wants to marry her boss.
Would you like some water? Thank you.
Where's the rest of the family? You will meet them at dinnertime.
And I think you will find that is quite soon enough.
Hmm.
Doralene! Where's that lazy girl? I love this house.
It's a very fine building.
When my husband married again, he tried to move me out, but I soon found my way back.
That must have been very upsetting for you.
The other wife? Ha ha ha! No.
I'm just sorry that he chose such a silly woman.
Still, better a silly woman than a dangerous one.
Just do what I tell you! - Dumela, mma.
- Dumela, mma.
Have you just arrived from the city? - Yes.
- Well, that guest room is bad no bath and none of the windows open.
Oh, and don't let that stupid girl bother you with her chatter.
This is the very best guest room.
Thank you.
Was that Master Jobe's wife? Mafela.
Do you know why she was so angry? Oh, she's just scornful of Master Jobe because he's not as successful as his bigger brother.
She wants a big apartment in the city.
She does not like this house, but there is no harm to her.
Tell me something: Do they get on, the two wives? Not at all.
It is very hard.
They are always fighting about who is the favorite of the old man.
And then when they are not looking, he chases after me.
He's a naughty old goat, that man.
There you go, there you go.
Don't spoil them they're my naughtiest children.
Hurry! Ha ha ha! - Dumela.
- Dumela, rre.
- I have the part you are looking for.
- Oh, good good good.
How is Mma Ramotswe? She's away on an investigation.
Ah, always busy.
Yeah.
You're very fond of her, aren't you? Well, I've always believed that she and I are ideally suited.
Then you must speak to her about your feelings.
I've tried to.
She won't allow me to.
I don't know why.
I can offer her great stability.
Maybe she's looking for something different in a companion.
I'm afraid that's all too true.
Last night I came very close to putting all thoughts of her aside, but then forgive me, mma.
It's you're the only person I can talk to.
I had this dream.
Ee? Mma Ramotswe was in the Kalahari Desert.
She was being attacked by a lion.
I rescued her by killing him with a knife.
Is that all? No, um in the dream, Mma Ramotswe was completely naked.
Completely naked? I think this dream is a very good sign indeed.
Completely naked! Welcome.
I'm the old man's younger wife.
It was so nice of you to talk to the old lady.
I hope you're not too bored.
That poor old woman rambles on and on and on these days.
It's very sad.
Anyway, I'll see you at dinner.
Okay.
Don't eat anything that is prepared by my daughter-in-law.
I hope I'm not disturbing you.
What a fine kitchen.
That smells delicious.
Are you happy in your work? I used to be, as a chef in the Imperial Hotel in Gaborone.
There I was treated with respect.
Why did you leave? Rre Makgothi liked the hotel food so much that he asked for one of the chefs to be sent to his family home.
Management picked on me and now I must work in this madhouse where people hate each other and all they want to eat is chicken and rice.
Life is not easy for a true artist.
- I love cumin.
- Put that back! Nobody touches anything in this kitchen! I'm sorry.
I won't disturb your good work any longer.
And l I look forward to supper this evening.
Ah, I'm sorry.
I was looking for a telephone.
You must be the detective.
Dumela.
Dumela.
I'm Jobe.
I am in disguise supposedly.
It was my wife who asked for you.
It will be a great relief to have her name cleared.
This has been very stressful for both of us.
I understand.
I mean, do you really think I would be with my wife if I thought she was poisoning my family? But those old women, they don't care who they gossip about.
Please, use the phone.
- Thank you.
- You're welcome.
1 Ladies' Detective You'll be pleased to know I'm still alive.
Good.
And what have you found out? Well, it's the kind of family where almost anyone could be poisoning anyone else.
But I'm beginning to think the daughter-in-law is in the clear.
What about the old man? - I'll meet him at dinner.
- Dinner? You must phone me again right after you've had your dinner.
I won't leave the office until you've Hello? Hello? Hello? Mma? Hello? Thank you, mma.
Ke itumetse.
So, mma, did you manage to make your phone call? I tried, but the line went dead.
It is always happening out here.
The repairman takes days and days to come.
We might as well be living on the moon.
Ooh! Are you sick too? Everyone is sick.
The old ladies are sick.
Sick sick, all the time.
Oh okay.
- Operator.
- Operator, I know it's late, but I've been trying to get through all night.
I'm sorry, but the line is still out of order.
Please try again tomorrow.
Thank you.
Ooh! I'm sorry.
I didn't realize there was someone in here.
Then you are not much of a detective.
Come here.
Sit down, please.
So tell me, why did you not eat your food tonight? You smelled something in the food.
You smelled something that was there once before.
And what was that? It was this.
I remember this herb from my childhood.
It does not kill but it makes people very sick.
Perhaps you are a clever detective after all.
Coco? Co ooh! Eh eh.
Coco.
- What time is it? - It is morning! What are you doing sleeping on the job? Mmm? That is not very professional 97%.
Mma Ramotswe promised she would phone and she would never ever break that promise unless something terrible had happened to her.
You need a cup of tea.
I'd never forgive myself if something happened to her.
It's just that that there are so many things that you never say to someone when you're with them every day so many things that you should say.
Mm-hmm.
Sugar babes, you are tired and worried and paranoid.
Hmm? Your brain has been under the dryer for too long.
Relax.
After that cup of tea, you'll feel better.
I am having a crisis, you silly man! And and it will not be solved by a cup of tea.
"The country house with its echoing corridors, poisoning plots and multiple suspects is a mere figment of popular fiction.
That is all there is to say about it.
" Come in.
Good morning.
There's a big commotion.
The big mma has accused the cook of poisoning the family.
I brought your tea.
If you found the poison in the kitchen, - then the poisoner must be the cook.
- No, I don't think so.
- Do you know the combination? - No.
Well, do you happen to know his birthday? He was born on New Year's Day.
How old is he now? He's 32.
Oh! You are a very smart detective.
What are you looking for? I don't know.
Wait a moment.
It's not what I expected.
But I think I just found the motive.
Better? No.
Yes? Yes? It's me.
Oh! She's alive.
L I tried to reach you all night, but I couldn't get through.
The telephone line had been cut - Tsamaya! but now it's in working order.
And I'm happy to say I'm also in working order.
I may have a task for you.
I'm ready! I've got to stay a few more hours.
But but you are due at the hospital at at 2:00.
I know.
A patient will die if no one is there.
If I'm not back in time, I want you to go to the hospital in my place.
L I can't.
Don't worry, I'll tell you exactly what to do.
You must sit in that ward.
"Sit in that ward.
" Do not go out of that ward.
"Do not go out" Whatever you see, whatever you hear, just stay.
Stay.
I had to cancel six meetings to be here.
For a fee of 1,000 pula, this better be good.
Rre Makgothi, you sent me here to find out if your sister-in-law tried to poison your family last month.
Well, did she? No, she did not.
But the person who did is in this room.
Oh It was a man who felt his work was not appreciated; an artist whose art went unacknowledged.
It's it's true.
L I thought Rre Makgothi would fire me if my food was bad.
I wanted to get my old job back at the Imperial Hotel that is why I put some herbs in the food last month.
I'm very sorry about that.
But I'm not responsible for what happened last night.
No, you aren't.
Let me tell you a story.
There was a first-born son, a clever young man, who started a business and then another and another until he became rich like his daddy.
He had a young half-brother, not as clever as himself, but not as bullying either.
- I don't have to listen to this.
- Sit down! The half-brother married a young woman who treated him scornfully because he had no talent for making money.
He was so desperate to prove himself that he got involved in smuggling illegal ivory out of the country.
Are you accusing me of being a criminal? What's going on here? - What is this? I knew you'd - I'm not finished.
One night a lady detective that is me stumbled across some evidence of his crime two elephant tusks.
She inadvertently left a trace of herself behind.
The half-brother and his wife panicked.
They feared that their crime would be discovered, so they decided to silence the lady detective for good.
So she persuaded you to bring me here to investigate the gossip that the cook had so foolishly caused and to repeat the same trick the cook did.
But this time, with a more serious intention.
This morning she left me a second dose of poison in a cup of bush tea.
If I had drunk it, it would have seemed as though I'd died from the same poison fed to all of you.
There would have been a houseful of witnesses to confirm it.
And this unfortunate man would have taken the blame.
Who says that this has been poisoned? Has it been analyzed? Have you tried it on one of the dogs? All right I'll try it myself.
No, wait! - Where is Mma Ramotswe? - She will be here by 3:00.
You wait here, Dr.
Sibenke.
Mma Ramotswe is very sorry she could not be here, but she is on a most difficult case.
How did you think you could get away with it? Huh? They were never going to get away with it.
They're not expert criminals.
In their nature, they're not criminals at all.
They've just been infected by the poison in this whole family.
You, old man you are to blame for caring about nobody but yourself.
You two ladies you are to blame for stirring up slander.
And you, Rre Makgothi, you are very much to blame.
You despised your brother and called him a fool.
She mocked and taunted him because she was following your example.
I must leave it to you and your family to learn some love and respect for one another.
Rre Makgothi, 1,000 pula could never begin to cover the risk I ran in solving this case.
This is my fee.
No.
Dr.
Gulubane! What I conclude as a result of my observation is that the cleaner has been unplugging one of the ventilators every Friday afternoon at 2:00.
As a result, three patients have died.
Thank God you saved the life of that one.
I was only following my instructions.
What will you do now? Well, the cleaner will lose her job for sure.
It's sad her husband has died; she has three small children to support.
What is the justice in firing her? In my opinion, that poor woman should not even know what she did.
But I must write a report and that report must tell the truth.
Will it include the poor training of your low-paid staff? No.
May I remind you that this is a very serious matter? Three patients have died.
Well, it won't console the families to know they died from a stupid mistake.
Besides I don't mean to sound heartless but I've seen the patients.
They were very old and ill.
If the others were the same, would they not have died anyway? That's the most outrageous argument I've ever heard.
Look, speaking personally and off the record of course you may be right.
Very creative.
I like this one.
Oh, no, I think this is better for me.
But here is something for you for small girls.
Mma, please come see my father.
I'll be back.
Look at him.
He's not afraid anymore.
What has happened? What did you do? It's a very long story.
Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, I wish to offer heartfelt thanks to those of our business community who have donated money and goods: Rre Cyril Mabusa of Mabusa & Sons What a tie.
Oh, you noticed it.
Mmm.
You don't think it's too bright? I think it'll take some getting used to, but I like it.
Shh! The bishop is talking.
whenever my vintage bishop-mobile breaks down, Rre JLB Matekoni of Speedy Motors! And lastly, one gift that cannot pass without a special acknowledgement, Mma Potokwane.
Thank you, Your Reverence.
For a gift of money that will help build a new wing for the orphanage and buy new beds for the kids, blankets and pillows too, I wish to thank Rre Josiah Makgothi Rre? - Who has donated a check for the magnificent sum of 100,000 pula! I cannot find Wellington.
He's over there under the tree.
You know, when I see those children together, I can hardly believe there's anything wrong in the world.
Tell Dr.
Gulubane at once! Dr.
Gulubane, it's the same exactly the same.
And look at the time.
That's impossible.
I think, Dr.
Sibenke, it would be best for everyone if you stayed away.
- Dumela, mma.
- Dumela, mma.
Is this all you've brought me for the charity sale? Ah, never mind! Taja! Put it in the room.
Thank you.
Hey, go on.
That's Tabitha teaching the boys rugby.
Motholeli, please ask Mamale for a glass of water for Mma Ramotswe.
Does she need any help? No no no no no, she likes to do things herself.
Both parents passed away and her bones are badly damaged by tuberculosis.
It's a very sad story.
Those pieces are too small to sell.
They'll make good covers for the toilet.
Give it to Maratep.
I'm very disappointed in Mr.
Patel.
He has so many shops and all they send us are those carpet off-cuts.
Mma, Larona broke the glass! Tell her not to pick it up! I won't be a moment.
Larona! Mma Potokwane suggested that I talk to you.
She says that you are a lady detective.
Ee, mma.
That is true.
Are you in need of some detecting? Ahh tell me, if someone is very frightened, and they live in fear of their life all day and all night, could you find out why? Who is this frightened person? It is my father.
His name is Rre Lisindi.
He he owns the curio shop at African Mall.
I know it.
I've bought things from there.
He's an honest man.
And all his life he has been a happy man too.
But now he he cannot even sleep; he can hardly talk.
And when I ask him what's the problem, he says there are things I must not know or I'll get into danger.
Danger? Did he use that word? Ee, mma that very word.
So you want me to find out what is troubling your father.
But I do not have enough mon Don't worry about money.
I will do what I can.
Take this.
It has my number on it.
"The #1 Ladies' Detective Agency"? Ee, mma.
I like it.
Oh.
Oh oh ahh! Snake! Snake! Snake! It's a mamba.
If this snake had bitten you, mma, you would be one dead detective.
- Ahh! - Ha ha! Stop fooling around! Put it in a bag and throw it away.
And then come back and clean the car.
I feel quite sick to think what could have happened.
Oh, don't be upset.
I was about to deal with it myself when a passerby appeared and gave me a tow.
You're so cool about it.
I've lived 38 years and never come so close to death.
L I thought you were 37? Yes.
Well, but tomorrow is my birthday.
- Tomorrow? - Yes.
- Congratulations! - Thank you.
- Are you celebrating? - No no no.
I'm past all that.
Everybody should celebrate the day of their birth.
Let me take you out to dinner.
No, that's not necessary.
- Please.
- That would be nice.
Thank you, mma.
That's a beautiful car.
Who taught you to make a car like that? No one.
No one at all? God.
What do you know about God? He is invisible.
Wellington, I've told you before, you may sit quietly outside but you must not disturb the clients.
He is not disturbing me.
I have a son his age at home.
I'm sorry I'm late.
It's been a very difficult morning.
A snake was in the van.
Dr.
Sibenke? Ee.
That is me.
Please, come into my office, Doctor.
What kind of snake? A mamba.
Don't worry I killed it.
Bush tea, I think.
So your family still lives in Zimbabwe? Ee, they do.
Of course I miss them every minute.
But I had to leave just to earn enough money to support them.
It's very sad what has happened there.
Ahh, it is more than sad.
But let us not dwell on these matters.
Mmm.
I was lucky enough to receive a post at the hospital working under Dr.
Gulubane.
Dr.
Gulubane? - He's a fine man and a good doctor too.
- He is.
But then something unfortunate happened.
The very week that I started work, a patient of mine died of no apparent cause on a Friday afternoon and at 2:00.
That is not unusual in a hospital.
Well there's more.
The following Friday there was another unexplained death at 2:00.
Then this last Friday the same thing happened again.
People look at me strangely now.
They don't want to talk to me; - they avoid me.
- Chh.
They feel that somebody should get the blame for these deaths.
I am a foreigner and a refugee.
It's understandable.
What are you looking for? I don't want to be recognized by Tabitha's father.
I've been to his shop before.
Ee.
Do these make any difference? Nnyaa, mma, no difference at all.
Well, not a big disguise.
I just don't want to be identified.
Well, I can't do anything about your distinctive figure.
There is nothing distinctive about my figure.
What about my hair? Well, I can make it longer so that it covers your face like a yak.
No, certainly not.
Then what am I going to do? He's already seen your face.
Mmm.
I know have you got any time today? Oh, no.
No no no no no.
You are not suggesting that I go.
Why not? It's very simple.
Find a birthday present for JLB.
And then what? While you're there, look around.
Look on the desk; look on the shelves.
Look around for what? For whatever he does not want you to see.
- Bah! - That's what's frightening him.
Excuse me, sir? Can I help you? I'm sorry? Yes, you can certainly help me.
I'm looking whoo.
I'm looking for a gift for a very good friend of mine and that's why I'm in your shop.
Take a look around.
Mmm.
Ooh, rre, this is pretty! You have a very good eye, rre.
There's only one village where they make those.
Good.
And what is that? Excuse me I must take this.
Lisindi Curios.
L I can't talk to you now.
I have a customer.
Okay.
Sir? Sir? Sir! Rre? Eh eh eh! This is my storeroom.
It is private.
Now, please, come out at once.
At once.
- Please.
- Please forgive me.
I thought it was just another way out.
Rre, we forgot the gift.
There is something in that storeroom.
- How do you know? - It's obvious! It's like when a bald man tries to hide his baldness by pushing his hair over like wet grass.
And then what do you see when you look at him? Huh? Baldness and a man underneath it.
I need to get into that storeroom.
I'll do it tonight.
Where will you sleep tonight? I don't know.
How would it be if you had a proper place to live? Like what? It doesn't matter what it's called.
You'd have regular food and a bed and school lessons too.
If Mma Ramotswe and I knew of a place like that, would you like to live there? Hup! Wellington? I'm sorry I'm late.
- Do we really have to do this? - No one will know.
We'll just take a quick look around and then we'll go.
Please give me the keys.
When we open the door, we must run as fast as we can to the buttons that turn off the alarm.
Ah shhh! Give me the code.
Shut the door.
Shut the door, shut the door.
Turn on the torch! Not at my face here! Well, that wasn't too difficult.
Give me that.
Something ran over my foot.
Hold this.
These tusks are fresh.
You can almost smell the animal they belonged to.
I'm afraid your father has got mixed up with ivory smugglers.
That's why he's so frightened.
Quick, put everything back the way it was.
No one must know we were here.
Hurry! Hurry! Let's go, let's go.
Oh! Turn the light off.
Turn the light off.
- Where are the keys? - I thought you had them.
I left them on top of the alarm.
Let's go, let's go.
Thank goodness.
That was getting on my nerves.
Ahh, let's go.
- What do we do now? - Run! - What? - Run! Take the keys.
I'll go get the car.
Charlie? Fanwell? These boys will be the death of me.
What time is it now? 8:30.
"From a disgruntled customer.
" Thank you, boys.
I'm very touched.
The tie is colorful.
Aha! But you shouldn't have wasted your money on the aftershave.
I'm quite happy smelling of Sunlight soap.
Ah, but, boss, women prefer smart-smelling men.
And that is the path to heavenly pleasure.
No no no.
You broke in? It was a legitimate search for evidence.
What if Rre Lisindi finds out that it was you? He'll tell the ivory smugglers and they'Il There's no way he can find out.
Shouldn't we tell the police? No.
I don't want to do that.
I want to solve this case myself.
In fact, I don't even want to tell them when I've solved it.
Why not? The only reason I took this case was because I wanted to give that young girl some peace of mind.
I don't think putting her father behind bars is a very good way of doing that.
But he's broken the law.
Rre Lisindi doesn't feel like a bad man to me.
If he's involved in a crime, it's because bad people have forced him into it.
- But - No more talking without tea.
We must talk about these mysterious deaths.
Do you really not know what's causing them? No.
After the first one, we took every precaution possible.
But it happened again twice.
Unfortunately, yes.
This is the ward.
Did all three patients die in the same bed? Yes, it was this bed right here.
We've changed the beds around, of course.
Maybe there's something wrong with one of the machines.
They've all been checked and tested.
We've even changed them around with ventilators from other wards.
Look, I have nothing to hide, but this is a medical problem.
Why don't you leave it for the hospital authorities to solve? I can't stand by while an innocent man's life is being ruined.
Just let me try something.
I'll come back on Friday.
I'll sit in this ward at 2:00 and then see what happens.
Mma Ramotswe, may I trouble you for your services? I'd be happy to help you, but I'm on my way to a meeting.
You can make an appointment with my secretary.
I'd prefer not to wait.
It's a family matter.
My card.
So what kind of family matter might this be? I'm a businessman here in the city, but my family owns a large farm north of Pilane and 6,000 head of cattle.
My father got married when he was young.
I'm the offspring of that union.
Then some years later he married again.
So your mother was late.
Nnyaa, mma.
She's still alive.
My father is one of those old-fashioned men who believes that two wives are better than one.
Oh.
His second wife had another son - Jobe, who is, I'm sorry to say, the fool of the family.
Mmm, those are harsh words.
How else can one describe a young man who fails at everything that he puts his hand to? Well, Jobe got married this year.
Then the trouble began.
What kind of trouble? One evening after dinner everyone in the family suffered a violent stomach complaint.
My mother lost no time in telling me her suspicions.
Oh, she believes Jobe's wife poisoned them all.
How did you guess? Were her suspicions correct? All I know is that now both wives are convinced that Mafela is the poisoner.
She phoned me this morning, begging for my help.
She requested a lady detective - and so I'm here.
- Mmm.
So you want me to question your family? Not question, no.
My father is a frail old man who has lost his sight.
It will distress him.
Just say that you are my private assistant who needs a holiday and then discreetly see what you can find out.
Well, Rre Makgothi, I am pleased to say I can take your case.
My fee my fee will be one thousand pula.
Thank you.
Enjoy it, miss.
Thank you.
So are you going to open it? What is it? It's a surprise.
It's perfect.
Ha! How did you know? Ha ha! - L l - I collect them percussion instruments.
I once had a dream that I'd be the greatest drummer in the world.
But now I just collect them.
- It's - Yes.
Where did you find it not at Rre Lisindi's shop? Yes, as a matter of fact.
You didn't steal it? No! Certainly not.
Promise me that you'll never again do such a crazy escapade.
Ahh, I did get a little carried away.
Is that a promise? I suppose so.
Mmm.
Mma Makutsi thinks I should tell the police.
Well, you know what happens if you do.
The little shopkeeper gets punished and the big guys at the top of the heap go scot-free.
You're right.
They are the ones who should be punished.
No, the people who run the ivory trade are more dangerous than any mamba.
If threatened, they'll strike to kill.
A woman in their world is like a fragile ship on a stormy sea, or an antelope in a desert full of lions.
It's been a very long time since someone compared me to an antelope.
If you'd only allow me to put a supportive arm around you Oh, JLB.
You are a kind and good man, and a very loyal friend.
But I don't need a supportive arm.
I really don't.
I don't think that girl is poisoning anyone.
There was a young woman in my village who was accused of being a poisoner, but it was only because her mother-in-law hated her.
Mmm, that happens in every village.
But I want you to be safe.
You must not eat any food at all unless everyone else is eating it too.
I don't want my first case as a detective to be investigating your death.
I hope you're not implying I starve myself.
Hmm! Dumela, mma.
Let me carry your suitcase.
You are expected.
Please, come in.
You must meet the big mma first.
She's waiting for you on the stoop.
Dumela, mma.
Dumela.
I am glad you are here.
Come and sit beside me.
Doralene, make sure our visitor's room is ready.
So you're my son's personal assistant? Yes, that is so.
I expected you to be skinny a skinny woman.
He does not like traditional shapes, my son.
Hmm.
Don't worry, mma.
I am not one of those girls who wants to marry her boss.
Would you like some water? Thank you.
Where's the rest of the family? You will meet them at dinnertime.
And I think you will find that is quite soon enough.
Hmm.
Doralene! Where's that lazy girl? I love this house.
It's a very fine building.
When my husband married again, he tried to move me out, but I soon found my way back.
That must have been very upsetting for you.
The other wife? Ha ha ha! No.
I'm just sorry that he chose such a silly woman.
Still, better a silly woman than a dangerous one.
Just do what I tell you! - Dumela, mma.
- Dumela, mma.
Have you just arrived from the city? - Yes.
- Well, that guest room is bad no bath and none of the windows open.
Oh, and don't let that stupid girl bother you with her chatter.
This is the very best guest room.
Thank you.
Was that Master Jobe's wife? Mafela.
Do you know why she was so angry? Oh, she's just scornful of Master Jobe because he's not as successful as his bigger brother.
She wants a big apartment in the city.
She does not like this house, but there is no harm to her.
Tell me something: Do they get on, the two wives? Not at all.
It is very hard.
They are always fighting about who is the favorite of the old man.
And then when they are not looking, he chases after me.
He's a naughty old goat, that man.
There you go, there you go.
Don't spoil them they're my naughtiest children.
Hurry! Ha ha ha! - Dumela.
- Dumela, rre.
- I have the part you are looking for.
- Oh, good good good.
How is Mma Ramotswe? She's away on an investigation.
Ah, always busy.
Yeah.
You're very fond of her, aren't you? Well, I've always believed that she and I are ideally suited.
Then you must speak to her about your feelings.
I've tried to.
She won't allow me to.
I don't know why.
I can offer her great stability.
Maybe she's looking for something different in a companion.
I'm afraid that's all too true.
Last night I came very close to putting all thoughts of her aside, but then forgive me, mma.
It's you're the only person I can talk to.
I had this dream.
Ee? Mma Ramotswe was in the Kalahari Desert.
She was being attacked by a lion.
I rescued her by killing him with a knife.
Is that all? No, um in the dream, Mma Ramotswe was completely naked.
Completely naked? I think this dream is a very good sign indeed.
Completely naked! Welcome.
I'm the old man's younger wife.
It was so nice of you to talk to the old lady.
I hope you're not too bored.
That poor old woman rambles on and on and on these days.
It's very sad.
Anyway, I'll see you at dinner.
Okay.
Don't eat anything that is prepared by my daughter-in-law.
I hope I'm not disturbing you.
What a fine kitchen.
That smells delicious.
Are you happy in your work? I used to be, as a chef in the Imperial Hotel in Gaborone.
There I was treated with respect.
Why did you leave? Rre Makgothi liked the hotel food so much that he asked for one of the chefs to be sent to his family home.
Management picked on me and now I must work in this madhouse where people hate each other and all they want to eat is chicken and rice.
Life is not easy for a true artist.
- I love cumin.
- Put that back! Nobody touches anything in this kitchen! I'm sorry.
I won't disturb your good work any longer.
And l I look forward to supper this evening.
Ah, I'm sorry.
I was looking for a telephone.
You must be the detective.
Dumela.
Dumela.
I'm Jobe.
I am in disguise supposedly.
It was my wife who asked for you.
It will be a great relief to have her name cleared.
This has been very stressful for both of us.
I understand.
I mean, do you really think I would be with my wife if I thought she was poisoning my family? But those old women, they don't care who they gossip about.
Please, use the phone.
- Thank you.
- You're welcome.
1 Ladies' Detective You'll be pleased to know I'm still alive.
Good.
And what have you found out? Well, it's the kind of family where almost anyone could be poisoning anyone else.
But I'm beginning to think the daughter-in-law is in the clear.
What about the old man? - I'll meet him at dinner.
- Dinner? You must phone me again right after you've had your dinner.
I won't leave the office until you've Hello? Hello? Hello? Mma? Hello? Thank you, mma.
Ke itumetse.
So, mma, did you manage to make your phone call? I tried, but the line went dead.
It is always happening out here.
The repairman takes days and days to come.
We might as well be living on the moon.
Ooh! Are you sick too? Everyone is sick.
The old ladies are sick.
Sick sick, all the time.
Oh okay.
- Operator.
- Operator, I know it's late, but I've been trying to get through all night.
I'm sorry, but the line is still out of order.
Please try again tomorrow.
Thank you.
Ooh! I'm sorry.
I didn't realize there was someone in here.
Then you are not much of a detective.
Come here.
Sit down, please.
So tell me, why did you not eat your food tonight? You smelled something in the food.
You smelled something that was there once before.
And what was that? It was this.
I remember this herb from my childhood.
It does not kill but it makes people very sick.
Perhaps you are a clever detective after all.
Coco? Co ooh! Eh eh.
Coco.
- What time is it? - It is morning! What are you doing sleeping on the job? Mmm? That is not very professional 97%.
Mma Ramotswe promised she would phone and she would never ever break that promise unless something terrible had happened to her.
You need a cup of tea.
I'd never forgive myself if something happened to her.
It's just that that there are so many things that you never say to someone when you're with them every day so many things that you should say.
Mm-hmm.
Sugar babes, you are tired and worried and paranoid.
Hmm? Your brain has been under the dryer for too long.
Relax.
After that cup of tea, you'll feel better.
I am having a crisis, you silly man! And and it will not be solved by a cup of tea.
"The country house with its echoing corridors, poisoning plots and multiple suspects is a mere figment of popular fiction.
That is all there is to say about it.
" Come in.
Good morning.
There's a big commotion.
The big mma has accused the cook of poisoning the family.
I brought your tea.
If you found the poison in the kitchen, - then the poisoner must be the cook.
- No, I don't think so.
- Do you know the combination? - No.
Well, do you happen to know his birthday? He was born on New Year's Day.
How old is he now? He's 32.
Oh! You are a very smart detective.
What are you looking for? I don't know.
Wait a moment.
It's not what I expected.
But I think I just found the motive.
Better? No.
Yes? Yes? It's me.
Oh! She's alive.
L I tried to reach you all night, but I couldn't get through.
The telephone line had been cut - Tsamaya! but now it's in working order.
And I'm happy to say I'm also in working order.
I may have a task for you.
I'm ready! I've got to stay a few more hours.
But but you are due at the hospital at at 2:00.
I know.
A patient will die if no one is there.
If I'm not back in time, I want you to go to the hospital in my place.
L I can't.
Don't worry, I'll tell you exactly what to do.
You must sit in that ward.
"Sit in that ward.
" Do not go out of that ward.
"Do not go out" Whatever you see, whatever you hear, just stay.
Stay.
I had to cancel six meetings to be here.
For a fee of 1,000 pula, this better be good.
Rre Makgothi, you sent me here to find out if your sister-in-law tried to poison your family last month.
Well, did she? No, she did not.
But the person who did is in this room.
Oh It was a man who felt his work was not appreciated; an artist whose art went unacknowledged.
It's it's true.
L I thought Rre Makgothi would fire me if my food was bad.
I wanted to get my old job back at the Imperial Hotel that is why I put some herbs in the food last month.
I'm very sorry about that.
But I'm not responsible for what happened last night.
No, you aren't.
Let me tell you a story.
There was a first-born son, a clever young man, who started a business and then another and another until he became rich like his daddy.
He had a young half-brother, not as clever as himself, but not as bullying either.
- I don't have to listen to this.
- Sit down! The half-brother married a young woman who treated him scornfully because he had no talent for making money.
He was so desperate to prove himself that he got involved in smuggling illegal ivory out of the country.
Are you accusing me of being a criminal? What's going on here? - What is this? I knew you'd - I'm not finished.
One night a lady detective that is me stumbled across some evidence of his crime two elephant tusks.
She inadvertently left a trace of herself behind.
The half-brother and his wife panicked.
They feared that their crime would be discovered, so they decided to silence the lady detective for good.
So she persuaded you to bring me here to investigate the gossip that the cook had so foolishly caused and to repeat the same trick the cook did.
But this time, with a more serious intention.
This morning she left me a second dose of poison in a cup of bush tea.
If I had drunk it, it would have seemed as though I'd died from the same poison fed to all of you.
There would have been a houseful of witnesses to confirm it.
And this unfortunate man would have taken the blame.
Who says that this has been poisoned? Has it been analyzed? Have you tried it on one of the dogs? All right I'll try it myself.
No, wait! - Where is Mma Ramotswe? - She will be here by 3:00.
You wait here, Dr.
Sibenke.
Mma Ramotswe is very sorry she could not be here, but she is on a most difficult case.
How did you think you could get away with it? Huh? They were never going to get away with it.
They're not expert criminals.
In their nature, they're not criminals at all.
They've just been infected by the poison in this whole family.
You, old man you are to blame for caring about nobody but yourself.
You two ladies you are to blame for stirring up slander.
And you, Rre Makgothi, you are very much to blame.
You despised your brother and called him a fool.
She mocked and taunted him because she was following your example.
I must leave it to you and your family to learn some love and respect for one another.
Rre Makgothi, 1,000 pula could never begin to cover the risk I ran in solving this case.
This is my fee.
No.
Dr.
Gulubane! What I conclude as a result of my observation is that the cleaner has been unplugging one of the ventilators every Friday afternoon at 2:00.
As a result, three patients have died.
Thank God you saved the life of that one.
I was only following my instructions.
What will you do now? Well, the cleaner will lose her job for sure.
It's sad her husband has died; she has three small children to support.
What is the justice in firing her? In my opinion, that poor woman should not even know what she did.
But I must write a report and that report must tell the truth.
Will it include the poor training of your low-paid staff? No.
May I remind you that this is a very serious matter? Three patients have died.
Well, it won't console the families to know they died from a stupid mistake.
Besides I don't mean to sound heartless but I've seen the patients.
They were very old and ill.
If the others were the same, would they not have died anyway? That's the most outrageous argument I've ever heard.
Look, speaking personally and off the record of course you may be right.
Very creative.
I like this one.
Oh, no, I think this is better for me.
But here is something for you for small girls.
Mma, please come see my father.
I'll be back.
Look at him.
He's not afraid anymore.
What has happened? What did you do? It's a very long story.
Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, I wish to offer heartfelt thanks to those of our business community who have donated money and goods: Rre Cyril Mabusa of Mabusa & Sons What a tie.
Oh, you noticed it.
Mmm.
You don't think it's too bright? I think it'll take some getting used to, but I like it.
Shh! The bishop is talking.
whenever my vintage bishop-mobile breaks down, Rre JLB Matekoni of Speedy Motors! And lastly, one gift that cannot pass without a special acknowledgement, Mma Potokwane.
Thank you, Your Reverence.
For a gift of money that will help build a new wing for the orphanage and buy new beds for the kids, blankets and pillows too, I wish to thank Rre Josiah Makgothi Rre? - Who has donated a check for the magnificent sum of 100,000 pula! I cannot find Wellington.
He's over there under the tree.
You know, when I see those children together, I can hardly believe there's anything wrong in the world.