The Penguins of Madagascar (2008) s01e02 Episode Script
It's About Time
(Snoring) (Alarm ringing) All hands, intruder alert! Ha, ha, ha! Oh, hello, neighbour! Hey, those snack provisions are for authorized personnel only.
Do not worry.
It is only I, king Julian, who is borrowing your delicious food for my stomach.
Yes, that is it.
"Borrowing.
" Hi-ya! And kick, punch, chop, mulch, duck, spin, back flip, twirl, Bob and weave.
Weave and Bob.
Plie, punch, kick.
And punch.
Oh! Oof.
Hello, neighbour! Fore! Argh! It is okay! I have 400 more golf balls where that came from! I like golf! I like flying! I don't like drowning! Oh, hmm.
Look out, coming through.
What the? Hello, you've run out of juice.
Grr.
Oh, hello, neighbour.
What are you do--? Sh, sh! But this is our home, our h.
Q.
, our inner sanctum.
You can't just barge-- can't hear you! Television! Too loud! (Laughing) Grr! (Screaming) Gentlemen, we need a vacation.
A vacation from that lemur.
We could visit a zoo.
They have pandas, and hippos and a lovely house of reptiles.
Private, you do know we live in a zoo.
We could visit a different zoo! Rico! Kowalski, calculate the furthest trip possible from our present location.
Climate? Unspecified.
Elevation? Unimportant.
Lemur population? I've come up with 2 locations that fit our vacation parameters.
Denmark.
I can't set foot in Denmark.
Why not, skipper? That's private, private! Between me and the Danes.
Very well, that leaves 1 location.
The moon.
Gentlemen, we are going to the moon.
(Gasping) And no, there's no zoo on the moon.
Well, we'll never get to the moon at this rate.
Let's pick up the pace! Men, I present to you the penguin-one.
Is it safe, skipper? (Crashing) Kowalski? Technically speaking? Maybe.
Say good-bye to earth, boys.
But skipper, earth has some of my favourite things, like cookies and oxygen.
And brown-paper packages tied up with string.
Kowalski, light this candle! T-minus 5, 4, 3, 2, 1.
(Snoring) Ignition! Yo, Max, do I look a little, I don't know, chunkier to you? I mean, I've been exercising and all, but no matter how I try, I can't get rid of all the succulent, delicious, dark meat.
Yikes! Ah! Just give it up, hairball.
You've never caught a bird in your life.
Never have, never will! (Stomach growling) Oh.
Whoa! A shooting star.
I wish, I wish for a bird that can't fly away.
And, I also wish the shooting star doesn't hit me.
Agh!! Hello? Neighbours? I would like to borrow your toothbrushes to scrub my hard-to-reach regions.
If you agree, say nothing at all! I guess they agree.
This is a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity.
And as long as we are borrowing, how about a little television, Maurice? You mean, big television.
Big and heavy.
Hmm, good point.
Let me think.
Okay, my brain is saying that the king, which is me, should not have to lift heavy things.
Mm-hmm.
I like heavy lifting! Welcome to the moon, boys.
Lemur population: Zip, zero, nada.
Beautiful.
Oxygen reading: surprisingly high.
Moon cheese content: Disappointingly low.
Oh! Private, claim this rock in the name of-- penguins! How did penguins get up here, when they-- can't fly? Thank you! I'm picking up a possible alien life form.
Game on, boys.
Disperse and investigate.
Skipper? Hello? Aliens? (Whimpering) Ooh, a moon rock! Oh, it's just a baseball-- that flew all the way to the moon? Ahh! Oh, hello.
Greetings, my little friend.
Excuse me, are you a penguin? Why, yes, I am.
A flightless bird? That means no flapping, no flying, no resistance.
(Laughing) Kudos, private.
You've discovered an alien life form.
A buffet! Skipper, this alien is oddly cat-like in structure.
A moon cat, eh? Moon cat? Greetings, moon cat.
We come in peace.
For now.
You really think that you're on the moon? Affirmative.
Well, good, because you are.
Definitely, you're on the moon.
Welcome to the moon.
Uh oh, they spotted the crash! They want to take you away! Who exactly is "they"? The, uh, the evil moon warriors.
We can take them.
(Growling) But that beam is their death ray.
Death ray? Bring it on! Look, I refuse to let anything happen to you guys.
You're coming with me! And to think, he just met us.
(Grunting) Poor Mort.
Here, let me help you.
Lift with your legs! Your tiny, tiny legs! You know, your majesty, I thought for sure the penguins would have this place booby-trapped.
Ahh! (Screaming) Mort, I am starting to think you are not taking this job seriously.
Hmm.
Ahh! Maurice! Hang on! Whoa! Ha, ha! Moon cat, I'm touched by your hospitality.
Uh, yeah.
Well, it's time to eat! (Laughing) And now, he's making us a meal.
You, sir, are a model of kindness.
(Knocking) Oh, my, do you hear that? They're coming! You better use my teleportation machine to hide.
Teleportation, that's pure science fiction.
Which is exactly why I've had to disguise it as a microwave oven.
It's top secret.
Camouflage, well played.
It's a bit of a squeeze.
Maybe if you took off the helmet.
This moon cat has opened his home, his heart and his top-secret technology to us.
He's downright neighbourly.
Hello, neighbour! Hello, neighbour.
Hello, neighbour.
(Screaming) You know, Kowalski, maybe I need to sign on to moon cat's good neighbour policy.
Forget the microwave! You mean, teleportation device? Whatever! No more fooling around! It's time! Moon cat is so right.
We can't fool around on the moon any longer.
It is time; Time to go home.
Wait, what? Nooo! Thanks for everything, moon cat.
Rico, gift him.
Food? For me? No one's ever, ever given me a gift before.
(Crying) Sorry.
You're quite welcome.
T-minus 5, 4, 3, 2, 1.
Ignition.
Kowalski, status report.
I am randomly pushing buttons while we spin out of control, skipper.
Can I push one? I'd feel better.
(Snoring) Prepare for splash-down.
Or crash-down, as it were.
Hello, trap-happy penguins.
We were, uh, just borrowing your-- oh, it was Mort's idea! Uh-oh.
Not to worry, my ring-tailed neighbour.
I've had a little attitude adjustment, thanks to my visit up there.
Hey, thanks for the fish! So, we didn't go lunar? It seems I forgot to carry the 2.
And there's no such thing as moon cat hospitality? Uh-uh.
Looks like we have intruders, boys.
Commence operation hammer-head! Excuse me, hammer whose head, exactly? Ahh!
Do not worry.
It is only I, king Julian, who is borrowing your delicious food for my stomach.
Yes, that is it.
"Borrowing.
" Hi-ya! And kick, punch, chop, mulch, duck, spin, back flip, twirl, Bob and weave.
Weave and Bob.
Plie, punch, kick.
And punch.
Oh! Oof.
Hello, neighbour! Fore! Argh! It is okay! I have 400 more golf balls where that came from! I like golf! I like flying! I don't like drowning! Oh, hmm.
Look out, coming through.
What the? Hello, you've run out of juice.
Grr.
Oh, hello, neighbour.
What are you do--? Sh, sh! But this is our home, our h.
Q.
, our inner sanctum.
You can't just barge-- can't hear you! Television! Too loud! (Laughing) Grr! (Screaming) Gentlemen, we need a vacation.
A vacation from that lemur.
We could visit a zoo.
They have pandas, and hippos and a lovely house of reptiles.
Private, you do know we live in a zoo.
We could visit a different zoo! Rico! Kowalski, calculate the furthest trip possible from our present location.
Climate? Unspecified.
Elevation? Unimportant.
Lemur population? I've come up with 2 locations that fit our vacation parameters.
Denmark.
I can't set foot in Denmark.
Why not, skipper? That's private, private! Between me and the Danes.
Very well, that leaves 1 location.
The moon.
Gentlemen, we are going to the moon.
(Gasping) And no, there's no zoo on the moon.
Well, we'll never get to the moon at this rate.
Let's pick up the pace! Men, I present to you the penguin-one.
Is it safe, skipper? (Crashing) Kowalski? Technically speaking? Maybe.
Say good-bye to earth, boys.
But skipper, earth has some of my favourite things, like cookies and oxygen.
And brown-paper packages tied up with string.
Kowalski, light this candle! T-minus 5, 4, 3, 2, 1.
(Snoring) Ignition! Yo, Max, do I look a little, I don't know, chunkier to you? I mean, I've been exercising and all, but no matter how I try, I can't get rid of all the succulent, delicious, dark meat.
Yikes! Ah! Just give it up, hairball.
You've never caught a bird in your life.
Never have, never will! (Stomach growling) Oh.
Whoa! A shooting star.
I wish, I wish for a bird that can't fly away.
And, I also wish the shooting star doesn't hit me.
Agh!! Hello? Neighbours? I would like to borrow your toothbrushes to scrub my hard-to-reach regions.
If you agree, say nothing at all! I guess they agree.
This is a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity.
And as long as we are borrowing, how about a little television, Maurice? You mean, big television.
Big and heavy.
Hmm, good point.
Let me think.
Okay, my brain is saying that the king, which is me, should not have to lift heavy things.
Mm-hmm.
I like heavy lifting! Welcome to the moon, boys.
Lemur population: Zip, zero, nada.
Beautiful.
Oxygen reading: surprisingly high.
Moon cheese content: Disappointingly low.
Oh! Private, claim this rock in the name of-- penguins! How did penguins get up here, when they-- can't fly? Thank you! I'm picking up a possible alien life form.
Game on, boys.
Disperse and investigate.
Skipper? Hello? Aliens? (Whimpering) Ooh, a moon rock! Oh, it's just a baseball-- that flew all the way to the moon? Ahh! Oh, hello.
Greetings, my little friend.
Excuse me, are you a penguin? Why, yes, I am.
A flightless bird? That means no flapping, no flying, no resistance.
(Laughing) Kudos, private.
You've discovered an alien life form.
A buffet! Skipper, this alien is oddly cat-like in structure.
A moon cat, eh? Moon cat? Greetings, moon cat.
We come in peace.
For now.
You really think that you're on the moon? Affirmative.
Well, good, because you are.
Definitely, you're on the moon.
Welcome to the moon.
Uh oh, they spotted the crash! They want to take you away! Who exactly is "they"? The, uh, the evil moon warriors.
We can take them.
(Growling) But that beam is their death ray.
Death ray? Bring it on! Look, I refuse to let anything happen to you guys.
You're coming with me! And to think, he just met us.
(Grunting) Poor Mort.
Here, let me help you.
Lift with your legs! Your tiny, tiny legs! You know, your majesty, I thought for sure the penguins would have this place booby-trapped.
Ahh! (Screaming) Mort, I am starting to think you are not taking this job seriously.
Hmm.
Ahh! Maurice! Hang on! Whoa! Ha, ha! Moon cat, I'm touched by your hospitality.
Uh, yeah.
Well, it's time to eat! (Laughing) And now, he's making us a meal.
You, sir, are a model of kindness.
(Knocking) Oh, my, do you hear that? They're coming! You better use my teleportation machine to hide.
Teleportation, that's pure science fiction.
Which is exactly why I've had to disguise it as a microwave oven.
It's top secret.
Camouflage, well played.
It's a bit of a squeeze.
Maybe if you took off the helmet.
This moon cat has opened his home, his heart and his top-secret technology to us.
He's downright neighbourly.
Hello, neighbour! Hello, neighbour.
Hello, neighbour.
(Screaming) You know, Kowalski, maybe I need to sign on to moon cat's good neighbour policy.
Forget the microwave! You mean, teleportation device? Whatever! No more fooling around! It's time! Moon cat is so right.
We can't fool around on the moon any longer.
It is time; Time to go home.
Wait, what? Nooo! Thanks for everything, moon cat.
Rico, gift him.
Food? For me? No one's ever, ever given me a gift before.
(Crying) Sorry.
You're quite welcome.
T-minus 5, 4, 3, 2, 1.
Ignition.
Kowalski, status report.
I am randomly pushing buttons while we spin out of control, skipper.
Can I push one? I'd feel better.
(Snoring) Prepare for splash-down.
Or crash-down, as it were.
Hello, trap-happy penguins.
We were, uh, just borrowing your-- oh, it was Mort's idea! Uh-oh.
Not to worry, my ring-tailed neighbour.
I've had a little attitude adjustment, thanks to my visit up there.
Hey, thanks for the fish! So, we didn't go lunar? It seems I forgot to carry the 2.
And there's no such thing as moon cat hospitality? Uh-uh.
Looks like we have intruders, boys.
Commence operation hammer-head! Excuse me, hammer whose head, exactly? Ahh!