The Real Housewives of Salt Lake City (2020) s01e02 Episode Script

1
[housewife] Previously on The Real
Housewives of Salt Lake City
Salt Lake City, Utah,
is known for its mountains
and world-class ski slopes.
But what Salt Lake City
is most known for
-is the Mormon Church.
-[bell tolls]
But we are not all Mormons.
-In the name of Jesus.
-[congregation affirming]
I am the First Lady of our church.
Whoo! [exclaims]
Everyone in Salt Lake City
knows the story
about Mary
and her step-grandfather.
It was kind of in my grandma's will
for us to marry.
And we're blessed to this day
because of it.
Whitney and I are cousins.
She fell in love with Justin.
They had this illicit, torrid affair,
and they were both
excommunicated from the Church.
-Hi, Mom.
-Perfect timing.
A good Mormon doesn't drink,
doesn't smoke,
doesn't have sex, doesn't swear.
Hi, pretty girl.
John, I love her in this outfit.
My husband and I own
multiple liquor brands.
Let's just put it this way.
Our house is always stocked.
-Dad, how long are you here?
-I'm outta here tomorrow.
Seth is living in Chicago for business,
but I need to be in Utah for my store
and for my jewelry design business.
I went to lunch with Heather.
I didn't know you guys
knew each other for 20 years.
I don't remember her.
She goes, "The only thing I remember
is Heather was the good-time girl,
and she was like, 'Whoo!'"
You guys,
Daddy has to leave to work.
My husband is a football coach
at the University of Utah.
Most of the time,
he is 5:00 a.m. out the door
and midnight at home.
It's like a FaceTime marriage,
if that was a thing.
Meredith's birthday's coming up.
-We need to do something.
-For sure.
-[reverse alert beeping]
-[horn honks]
-What does Sharrieff think?
-He doesn't know.
[cheering]
Whoo!
My aunt just got both legs
amputated at the last minute.
You said, "It smells like hospital
in here." That hurt me.
I don't know what you want me to do.
-Her legs are gone.
-I'll be back.
Bitch, don't [bleep] disrespect
my [bleep] family!
In this town,
I'm Queen Bee and MVP.
When you take cheap shots,
always expect a hangover.
This rose isn't scared
to handle a little prick.
Jealousy is a disease
to which I say, "Get well soon."
I love God, but I will read you
like a scripture.
Just like my pioneer ancestors,
I'm trying to blaze a new trail.
What is your point
of saying that?
It's to [bleep] be
a [bleep] evil ass bitch
and just say something!
Who the [bleep] says that [bleep]?
That's like looking
at a little baby with cancer
and saying, "Oh!
You smell like cancer."
Are you [bleep] kidding me right now?!
And people want me
not to lose my [bleep] mind?!
I defend my family.
Oh, and "I hope your aunt's okay"?
[scoffs] Do you, bitch?
Do you hope she's okay?
Because that's who raised me.
Babe, come here. I saw that.
And I'm so sorry.
And then her excuse is,
"Oh, yeah, I said it."
-Why do you say that?
-What's the point?
Disrespecting family?
Are you [bleep] kidding me?
It's just a dig. It was a dig,
A dumb dig.
This whole Mary/Jen fight
is ridiculous.
I wasn't there. I've heard Mary made
some comment about hospital smell,
and Jen had just returned
from the hospital
visiting her aunt
getting a double amputation,
and now we're fighting about it
at Meredith's birthday party?
I don't I It's absurd,
and I don't even know why
we're still talking about it.
And she's in my goddamn
[bleep] house?
Looking like a [bleep] Christmas tree.
-A loofah, babe.
-She needs to go scrub her ass
with that [bleep] loofah dress
she's wearing.
Whitney, I'm gonna go check
on Jen really quick.
Yeah. I saw her walk off.
-Jen?
-You said that.
She should know
what she's dealing with.
I don't bring just anybody
into my circle.
It's a privilege
to be in your circle for sure.
What do you wanna do?
Wanna talk to her about it?
Here she is.
Well, welcome. On cue.
Talking about the hospital.
-Why did you say that?
-The hospital?
That she smelled like hospital?
-I didn't say "she."
-Oh.
I said, "It smells like
hospital in here."
-But why?
-Because it did.
I'm sorry, but Jen and her entire crew
smelled like hospital.
Yeah.
I ended up in a hospital for a month.
I've never been in a hospital
in my life for nothing.
Just to have my son.
I pushed one time. He came out.
I went to get
all my odor glands removed.
I had 12 surgeries,
so I ended up being there for 30 days.
So that smell, I'm like, ugh!
I would just
I could not take that smell,
like, sickening.
And to this day, I can't go in.
Like, I'll cry if I have to go.
It brings back bad, you know
Just, and so it got taken back
to her as if it was derogatory.
-Yeah, all of us.
-Hi, guys!
Hey.
We were just chatting.
Mary and Jen were
in a heated conversation,
and I saw that Jen
was getting emotional.
I think she just wanted
to have a moment.
-Can I go check on her?
-Yeah, maybe.
Here's the thing.
I knew you had surgeries.
You're saying, "Hospitals
bring back a bad reminder."
You don't have to tell me.
Hospitals have
a terrible reminder to me.
I sat in there for nine days
watching my
Okay, but why are
we harping on something I
You're trying to justify saying
"You smell like hospital."
I didn't justify
-Ladies, ladies.
-I'm not here to
No, I'm not gonna get into
right or wrong or whatever.
That's between you guys.
-Let's have fun.
-I don't want to do this either.
Mary, you know what?
-I'm good.
-'Cause you're so dismissive,
because you don't wanna be a
Stay here and talk
about the real issue!
-I don't argue. I don't do this.
-Because you don't wanna talk
when it's your fault.
-What's my fault?
-My aunt got double amputated.
-You said, "You smell like hospital."
-Let's not rehash
I wanna get it straight
You're in the middle
of throwing a party,
and it's just not the time.
-I don't want you to be upset.
-But not right now.
-I'm not upset. I'm hurt.
-I'm sorry if I hurt you.
I would never wanna hurt you.
Come here, please?
-Like, really?
-Yes.
I'm gonna find my Zen Jen
and do everything I can
to accept Mary's apology
even though I kinda think
it's bull[bleep].
But I'm gonna accept it.
For the sake of Meredith,
let's move forward.
But Mary M. Cosby, I'm watching you.
You can't be mad in that dress.
You kidding me?
-Whoo!
-One, two, three, fake laugh.
I love it.
I want to say hi to Lisa.
-[gasps] Hi.
-How are you?
This is amazing.
How have you been?
Crazy busy.
So your vow renewal, how did it go?
-It was amazing.
-Yeah?
Everything you wanted?
-The drinks were phenomenal.
-Thank you.
Our bartenders had so much fun.
I'm glad it went well.
Yes. Did you talk to them
in detail at all?
-I haven't talked to either of them.
-They had fun, too.
Lisa was very generous
and gifted us
VIDA Tequila and bartenders
for our vow renewal.
However, I hired them to serve
my guests, not themselves.
I think they were having
one for them, one for
-Oh, my gosh.
-Yeah.
I just want to let you know
they got a little drunk.
-Both of 'em?
-Yeah, and it was kind of a mess.
[Whitney] My brand-new house
is completely [bleep] up!
It's just glass everywhere.
The bar was a little wrecked.
A lot of glass broken.
Some of my husband's whiskey
from Ireland was opened. Top shelf.
-Our tequila is top shelf.
-Tequila you can't get in the States.
Whitney called, basically
asking me for the tequila.
If you call me and say you'd
like to have VIDA Tequila there,
you are asking for a donation,
or you would have gone
to the liquor store.
I generously give to someone,
and it's [bleep] on.
Maybe it's because you guys
ran out of my tequila.
You know what's funny?
We ran out at 6:00.
That's shocking,
because we sent enough tequila
for, like, 500 people.
What Whitney does with the gift
I gave her is up to her.
If I give you a Chanel necklace
and you choke on it,
that's your problem, not mine.
Hopefully it turned out good.
It doesn't sound like it did.
-I'm not trying to get anyone in trouble.
-I won't ever use them again.
I just want you to know
'cause you run a tight ship
and you're amazing.
It was beautiful.
I really appreciated you.
It was my pleasure.
Little gift for you.
Happy to do it.
Let's talk about other stuff.
It's fine.
-Hey.
-Hi!
I'm gonna go home.
I don't wanna be here.
-What's wrong?
-Nothing.
Whitney came up to me.
I was so generous, sent her tequila,
and I'm sorry her party
turned into a nightmare.
I sent enough tequila for 500 people,
She's like, "We have to talk
about your bartenders.
They got a little too involved.
Glasses were broke."
I'm realizing now Lisa's mad at me
for telling her that she's not perfect,
and that her brand isn't perfect.
By the way, I don't even drink
VIDA Tequila.
I keep my Casamigos in the back.
I don't want trash telling me
something's not good.
I'm mad. That was going for my business.
I'm not okay with that.
You don't go for my company. Don't
[bleep] with me. That's it. I'm done.
-[Whitney] You did an amazing job.
-Thank you.
You throw the best parties.
[vacuum whirring]
-What does that say?
-Me llamo Omar.
Crushed it.
-Stuart.
-Yeah?
-Hurry. Clean everything.
-I got you.
He thinks this was just a few girls.
The six of us were here.
Oh, my gosh.
What is this doing here?
Hide the bottles.
Baby.
-Hi!
-Hi, sweetie.
-How was your recruiting?
-Long.
We're just cleaning
after Meredith's birthday party.
Why are so many people cleaning?
How many people came?
Just the girls.
Did your neck start popping?
If it gets like that, that's a problem.
[laughter]
If your neck start poppin',
it's about to go down.
Can you swing on the pole for me?
-Whoa.
-I know that some might think,
"Wow, born and raised Mormon girl
has a stripper pole."
Whoo! [laughs]
Exactly. I was raised
in suppression my whole life.
What do you expect?
What have you been doing
all your life
-I have been missing out on?
-[laughs]
-Preparing for battle.
-[laughs]
[cellphone rings]
Oh, my God. [laughs]
-What are you doing?
-I'm trying on my ski gear.
-Amazing.
-What are you doing?
Have you recovered
from your birthday party?
-Did you have fun?
-Absolutely.
Super, super fun.
I haven't been out skiing yet.
Have you?
-We gotta get out. Let's plan a trip.
-I'm ready. When and where?
-Snowbird, Brighton?
-Okay.
Call a couple of the girls. I will, too.
We'll set it up, make it happen?
-Yeah.
-Sounds good, babe.
-All right, mwah.
-Talk to you soon.
Talk to you later. Bye-bye.
For Sundance, I think I can get
some of the crystal bottles
-done from Swarovski.
-Hey.
-How was school?
-Good.
You didn't skip seminary?
-No.
-He did.
-You better not have.
-That's a lie.
[laughs] Do you think
he skipped, Henry?
I would do it.
I hope not. So I guess I'm doing
a girls' ski day on Thursday.
I guess Heather's hosting it.
-Whitney's gonna be there.
-Oh.
I'm still a little irritated.
You have every right to be.
The last person I wanna hang out with
on a ski mountain is Whitney,
but I wanna have a good time
with my friends.
I don't wanna lose our liquor license
over somebody's wedding in their basement
with a stripper pole.
It's just really bothering me
that she immediately
jumps into not being happy
with the bartenders.
How is that my problem?
-You're way too generous.
-I was totally being generous.
I bought her the tequila, the mixers.
How ungracious are you?
I wasn't even invited
to your vow renewal.
I'm gonna let this go.
She wanted our tequila there.
I gave you a gift.
Say thank you. Be done.
Do you want listening
or any feedback?
-I just wanna talk.
-Okay.
-I mean, do you want me
-But for real, the way I look at it is
-we're fine. We're good.
-Okay.
After the party,
Whitney sent me a text.
I was like,
"I don't wanna do this over text."
So I gave her a call and gave her
some friendly advice, and I'm good.
What are you gonna do Thursday?
Are you gonna let it affect you?
If she brings it up, I'll shut it down.
If she doesn't, we're fine.
I did a good deed.
I was generous. End of story.
Done.
-Hey, Ryan.
-Heather, what brings you in?
I need some new boots for the season.
-[Ryan] Get dialed in.
-Yeah.
-What?
-Ryan, this is Whitney.
-Look at you.
-You grabbed your board.
I need it to be waxed.
We can make that happen.
-Are you ready?
-I'm excited.
Party on the mountain.
-Check out some boots? Awesome.
-Let's do it.
-Is color going to determine this?
-Color is gonna determine this.
How about maybe this Rossignol?
Are young guys on snowboards
gonna see Rossignol boots
-and be like, "She's 40. She's done"?
-No.
No one is gonna guess your age
based on your boots.
Sister, yes, they are.
I grew up on the slopes.
My parents dropped me off
at the bus station every Saturday,
and I skied every single Saturday.
I'll try whatever's best,
then sell it on the mountain.
If you live here and don't ski,
it's really a tragedy.
Definitely recommend a thin ski sock.
Sounds like your grandma's mattress.
[imitating bed squeaking]
You picked the right boot, Ryan!
[laughter]
This is definitely the pair I want.
Whitney, they're working
on your board right now.
-Perfect.
-Extra wax for Whitney's board.
I'll tell you right now
Ryan has got all the hot wax.
He's the man.
I'm gonna get your skis set up.
Back in just a minute.
-Awesome. Thank you.
-You bet.
-This is awesome, huh?
-Yeah.
This place is the best.
Um, so what did you think
of the party?
I've been processing it for three days,
'cause I didn't have fun,
even though it was magnificent
and I was having fun moments.
-Mm-hmm.
-Overall, I was like
pretty unprepared for how much, like,
Lisa just completely dismissed me.
-Hey.
-Hi!
How's it going? Good to see you.
Okay. I was just gonna go in
for a hug.
Did you feel kinda shut down?
I felt sad, like my feelings were hurt.
So you haven't talked to her since.
I haven't. Seeing her skiing
will be the first time.
Why did you invite Lisa?
We have history.
She's part of our group,
and I just wanna be better.
I just wanna try.
Right. At the party,
I just shared with her
what happened with her bartenders
at my vow renewal.
She did not like it.
After the party,
she calls me immediately
and she proceeded to tell me
do not come after her entities.
Then she threatened to use rumors.
-That she's heard
-That she's heard about me against me.
-What did she say?
-Lisa accused me of being a swinger.
In her mind, it's, "How could they
possibly be that close as friends
and not be swingers?"
-Oh, like husband swapping or whatever?
-Yeah.
Utah has a history of, you know,
plural marriage.
There's a huge
swinger community here.
-It makes me feel like Yeah.
-"I have something on you."
"So don't go there with me."
We have polygamy in our family.
I've heard stories of people
having a can wire phone system
that they communicate with
from house to house.
Whenever the marshal
would come in town,
they would send messages
to hide the wives.
It bugs me that she's, like, trying
to attack my reputation and character.
I've just gotten to a point and so used to
being judged for who I am.
-You do take a lot of [bleep].
-I take a lot of [bleep]
because I followed what I was told.
I followed all the guidelines,
-and I was still unhappy inside.
-Mm-hmm.
Growing up,
I was the perfect Mormon girl.
In fact, I had an opportunity
to either go on a senior trip to Maui
with my girlfriends
or go on a three-week
church history tour,
and I chose
the church history tour.
The night I got home,
I messed around with my boyfriend,
had beer, and didn't feel bad about it.
That's really when I started my journey
of, whoa, do I really believe this,
or am I just trying to fit
in the cookie cutter life?
When you step outside of the guidelines,
I mean, I was cut off.
When you hooked up with Justin or
-Yes, because I was married.
-It happened.
-But you got divorced.
-Yes.
And now you've been together 15 years.
So people can't look past me
being whatever they wanna call me.
They don't see it as a love story.
You're a homewrecker.
-Do you think you're a homewrecker?
-Absolutely not.
Lisa thinks she's better than us.
Because she feels superior to us,
she feels entitled to call out anything
that she thinks is morally deficient.
And judging other people,
while that might be Mormon,
with Lisa, it's on another level.
You for sure don't have to
prove yourself to Lisa Barlow.
I do not, and I won't.
Thursday will be a fun day.
We've got activities
and nobody's gonna judge.
I just want it to be fun.
Are we gonna get an instructor?
I always try to solicit
a hot ski instructor.
[laughter]
[chirps]
Do you want another grilled cheese?
Brooks, that phone
sucks your brain out.
-It does.
-I'm convinced.
Get off the phone, honey.
Do you want this one extra cheesy?
-Hmm?
-Yeah?
Are you guys excited to see Grandpa?
Yeah. [laughs]
That grilled cheese is good.
Do you have any homework tonight?
Nope.
-Hey. Whit?
-Oh, Grandpa's here.
-You made it.
-Hey, honey.
What's up, B? Get over here,
you little stinker.
[makes buzzing sound]
Growing up, I was the definition
of a daddy's girl.
We did everything together.
He was at every dance recital,
every cheer competition.
In fact, when I was having boy trouble
or problems with my friends,
I'd call my dad,
and he'd be right there.
Hey, Rocky.
-Grandpa's back.
-Hey, buddy.
My dad was my best friend.
-Did you find the fur coat?
-I found everything.
-The storage unit's just
-How big is it?
12x24 or something like that.
It makes me so sad because
our relationship is so different now,
because my dad has been addicted
to painkillers
for the last 10 years.
Is it personal stuff,
or do you have business stuff in that?
I have a full set of stuff
to open a salon with.
-You do.
-So I'm gonna do that.
I'm just gonna wait till I'm ready
and figure out where,
but I'm gonna go back to what I do.
My dad was a self-made millionaire.
He was a very successful
hair school owner, salon owner.
He developed his own haircare line.
And my dad's addiction
took everything away from him.
It's like I'm starting over
at 63 years old.
I look at it as a blessing.
I've prayed for the rain.
Now I gotta deal with the mud.
I found out my dad was abusing
substances six years ago.
My parents' marriage started struggling
around the time I turned 16,
and my mom chose to divorce him.
My dad became very lonely
and turned to prescription drugs
to self-medicate.
I went out to lunch with Mary.
-How'd it go?
-She invited us to her church.
Would you wanna go?
Yeah, that'd be cool.
When everyone started learning
about my dad's addiction,
I was the only one that stood by his side
and offered him help.
Most Mormons view addiction
as a consequence of your choices.
I used to actually believe that
until I watched my dad
go through the program
when I really learned this is a disease.
-You look good.
-Really?
Are you okay? You see all right?
I'm serious, Dad. You do.
You have that light back in your eyes.
Yeah.
I truly believe that
if I didn't stick by my dad
and continue to put effort
into whatever form of relationship
I could have with him,
I truly believe that
if I wouldn't have done that,
I don't think my dad would be here.
It'll be a lifelong thing.
It's just something
you have to deal with.
I have your table right this way.
Good to see you.
All right.
-Thank you.
-Of course.
-Thank you very much.
-Thank you.
Thank you, honey.
Starving.
[indistinct background conversations]
-You do look beautiful tonight.
-Thank you.
-I appreciate the eye contact.
-Who am I normally looking at?
Your phone.
I've barely even
touched my phone today.
Your phone was playing the role
of your husband.
-Barely touched it.
-Oh, ha ha.
-[chuckles]
-So funny.
Seth and I have been together
for a really long time.
We met when we were 23.
We got married at 24
and had a baby at 25,
so it was just a tornado
that came through,
and that was it.
We wanna start
with the Hamachi first, right?
-Hamachi.
-Crudo?
I was young, but head over heels
in love, so I went for it.
-Do you want to start with anything else?
-We'll get back to you on that.
Sounds good. All right.
Now we can relax and have fun,
unless you have something
you wanna raise with me.
Oh, do I have something I wanna raise.
Okay.
It's kinda the elephant
in the room.
Who have you told
that we are separated?
[server] Pardon me.
I have the Impossible Dreams
with the Vida Reposado.
-Amazing.
-I'll be right back with shared plates.
Do all your friends know
we're separated?
No. It's not like I'm running around
talking about this to everyone.
So I would prefer that
you don't discuss it.
[indistinct conversations]
Our relationship, our marriage,
do you think that was made to last?
Do all your friends know
we're separated?
No. It's not like I'm running around
talking about this to everyone.
Our relationship, our marriage,
do you think that was made to last?
I hope so.
There's not one thing I can say
that really triggered our separation
because over the years,
it just broke down.
We moved many times.
We kind of were uprooted,
and I was trying to start my company.
He was running his business.
We had the three kids.
There was just no communication,
and hostility built and built and built.
And we just sort of got
so totally overwhelmed,
that we really just were
completely disconnected.
Life changes, and we have
to grow with it, you know?
-Do you agree with me?
-Yeah, I agree with you.
You gotta put in the work.
It's a 2-way reciprocal
It's gotta be
Are you trying to intimate that
I'm not putting the work in?
Never hurts to throw in
a couple extra reps
or another 10 minutes
on the treadmill emotionally.
This is hard stuff.
No kidding.
[server] So we have our Hamachi crudo.
This is our signature salad here.
-Beautiful.
-Thank you.
You're welcome.
Any more drinks at the moment?
-In a little bit. Thank you.
-All right.
Tell me something
I don't know about you.
What's something I don't know
about you?
I'm so transparent.
It's, like, crazy, like
No, your definition of "transparency"
is very bizarre.
It has nothing to do
with "Read my phone."
-That's not transparent.
-Read my phone.
-Read every message on the phone.
-I don't wanna read your phone.
Those are messages
that were sent to you, not to me.
But you would never hand me your phone.
Because I think that's wrong.
Because you're hiding something.
Let's trade phones.
I'm done with this conversation.
We've had it ad nauseam.
I'm not reading your phone.
I would like you to read my phone
'cause it would make me think you care.
I'd like to have a life partner
and a soulmate to share everything with,
so I hate being separated,
but at the same time,
I'm not dating anyone else,
and I sure as hell hope you're not.
I do care, and this is
supposed to be light and breezy.
Let's have a little fun.
Here you go, right on cue.
The Impossible Dream.
-You know what's ironic?
-Let's have fun.
To fun.
Can we get the bellman?
This is so heavy.
My forearms are ready to bust.
It's like the best day ever for skiing.
Where's Mary?
I just got a text from Mary.
She's running late.
She was waiting on a FedEx package.
Whew.
[panting]
Oh, my God.
[panting] I can't
I'm winded. I can't do no more.
I'm not in shape like this.
[exhales deeply] Oh, God.
-Hi.
-Ah! Look who's here!
-Oh, my gosh. Mary.
-Hello!
You look amazing.
-So what did come from FedEx?
-My coat.
I can't go skiing
without a beautiful outfit.
Ski clothes can be very
I mean, you'll get a wedgie,
and you can't get to the wedgie.
You got your ski suit, your warmers.
Your underwear's all the way up,
and you're trying to dig
and cannot get 'em.
So I like to wear the brands
that don't give you wedgies.
Chanel's one of them.
I was willing to wait.
I had another coat.
It just wasn't a match.
And if one thing's off,
it's not right.
Listen, if I can inspire people
by looking good
to wanna ski
and be out here in the cold,
then I've done my job.
-How long have you been skiing?
-Since I was a kid.
I tried to snowboard
for a few years, but
-You didn't get into it?
-I couldn't do it. It was too hard.
Excuse me. I'm here.
Oh! Outfit change number one.
-You look good!
-Thank you.
When I post a picture on Instagram,
they're gonna think
I'm on the Black Diamond,
'cause I look Black Diamond, okay?
-Mary!
-[laughs] Hi!
Hi, sweetheart. How are you?
I love your bag.
-Mary!
-Hi. How are you?
I see Mary here.
I'm gonna keep it cool
because I've moved on, right?
I look cuter than you.
Bring it to the bunny hill.
Let's get up there.
We're going this way,
whoever's coming this way.
Be safe on the bunny hill.
Let's do it.
[Mary] Let's go ski.
-Whoo!
-Let's go!
Let's go!
Whoo!
[Heather] The snow in Utah
is like nowhere else.
It's a dry, light powder
that just cuts
and grooves,
and you can feel it.
You can spray it.
It feels magical. [laughs]
I mean, it's the best snow
on earth.
I'm gonna beat her! I'm gonna get her!
Yeah!
Yeah, Meredith!
-Hands up.
-Okay.
-Hips forward.
-Like this?
It's like a Brazilian, uh, booty lift.
-Oh, okay.
-Brazilian Butt Lift?
If you need to, grab your bum
and go, wow!
Okay, I got it.
I haven't skied on the bunny hill
since I was 9 years old,
and Lisa, Jen, and Mary
never even left,
like, the rope tow hill.
Oh, perfect. Snow angels.
I assumed by the outfits
they were wearing
they were gonna be able to perform,
which they could not.
I'm having an issue
with my glove. Okay.
Aah!
Whoo!
[Whitney] Oh, my gosh.
-Get back up. Let's go!
-Okay, let's go.
Lisa, I took
a ski lesson yesterday.
Oh, I love that.
-Whoo!
-[rhythmic clapping]
[all chanting]
Move it, move it.
Move it on down that hill, hey.
Move it, move it
-Uh-oh.
-Move it on down that hill.
[Bleep].
I feel like we were
gonna be competing today,
and I wanted to win.
Well, Jen, the thing about skiing
is that it's supposed to be fun.
Yeah, I know, but it's fun to win.
[laughs]
-Oh.
-It's amazing.
-This is spectacular!
-Isn't it great?
It's been a good day.
Seems like you and Lisa are good.
I was nervous. At the party,
she didn't really talk to me.
I thought it went great.
New day, new activity.
How are you feeling?
'Cause you guys had words after the party.
My thing with Lisa is
we've just had
some big misunderstandings.
I've known Lisa for a few years,
and it's funny to me that
we still struggle to communicate.
I feel like we need to style
Whitney out a little bit, Mer.
What's wrong with my style?
It's a little Utah.
It doesn't matter what we're
talking about or where we are,
one of us is offended.
I thought Meredith
could shed some light
on how to better understand
Lisa moving forward.
She's just with me,
always has these subtle threats
of, well, "If you're gonna
talk about this,
then I'm gonna talk about
what people say about you."
So what did you say?
I dismissed that because I honestly
don't care about these rumors.
I told her, "I don't care
what people think about me,"
and she said, "As your big sister,
maybe you should."
It depends. "As your big sister"
could be a reference that she's older.
Looking out for you.
And I know that
she strives for perfection,
which is amazing,
but I'm not perfect,
and I know that.
I'm so messy around the edges.
I think maybe you're sensing
what she sees her role as being
more like big sister or whatever
as being condescending
rather than caring,
and I understand that,
if you're saying
it was coupled with a threat.
I get where you're coming from,
so I'd explain it to her,
'cause that's not what
she's trying to communicate,
at least as far as I know.
I've known Lisa
for seven or eight years,
and she generally acts
out of kindness,
and I would imagine that
her intent was to be helpful.
-Let's just ask her.
-I would talk to her.
-Let's ski. I wanna ski.
-Yeah.
If you've ever wondered how long
it takes for eight women
to recover from skiing
and get ready for a dinner?
We're ready.
Three-and-a-half hours.
[crickets chirping]
By the time we get there,
the restaurant is empty.
We completely missed
our reservation.
-Hi, guys.
-Hello!
-Hello!
-Hi, girls!
Hello, sister.
They still agreed to seat us.
-I need a drink.
-Let's get you a drink.
Hi. Can I get you
something to drink?
-Pinot Noir. Thank you.
-Do you want something to drink?
I'm gonna start with water,
and then I'll probably advance.
So how was your day?
I loved it. I loved watching you
make snow angels
and cheerleading me on.
I can't hurt before Sundance,
so I just, like, was very slow.
The last thing I need to do
is get hurt.
I don't care if I'm up there
with the five-year-olds,
I care more about money
than how I get down this hill.
My best part of my day
is watching all your ski outfits.
Like, I need to step up my game.
Emily Rose,
we're gonna keep 'em coming.
So I'm super excited because
I'm going to church with Mary.
Oh, I love that.
What?
What happened is
Whitney opened up to me,
about her dad,
so her and her dad's coming.
-Oh, I love that.
-Yeah.
I'm gonna say bring your dad to my church.
-He would love it.
-I'm positive it'll help him.
My dad's been
battling with addiction,
and I've been his source
of finance, emotional support,
everything for him, so something
that he is considering right now
is going back to the Mormon Church.
At the very least,
he deserves support.
He deserves help.
If it's available, he should have it.
Would you feel better if he went
to a different church?
-Any church would help him.
-That's why Mary invited me.
Yeah. It could be a simple as him
walking into the Mormon Church
or into Mary's congregation.
If someone touches him and says,
"You're okay. You're safe,"
that's what he needs.
Becoming a convert,
I can honestly say I love being LDS
because it made my life better.
Then you definitely
shouldn't judge him.
-No.
-What does that mean?
That's how we were raised.
That's the cultural side of the church,
not the gospel.
And there's a big difference.
Even beyond the cultural,
that's Utah.
But I'm gonna take it next level.
Why do we judge each other?
We do, and I felt judged
many times.
I think there's real issues that are
unresolved within each other.
It's better to come out and say it.
If you're thinking it, just say it.
I feel judged by you, Lisa.
I don't judge you.
I don't know why you would say that.
Just listen to her.
Just accept whatever she says.
Tell me.
What is it? What do you mean?
I feel like, you know,
we've had our, like,
misunderstandings, disagreements.
I'm trying to figure out
how I made you feel judged.
When we had a conversation
after Jen's party
Okay.
I just felt a little threatened.
If you feel threatened,
that's because you feel threatened,
not because I threatened you.
I don't threaten people.
When I said to Whitney that
she should discuss her issues with Lisa,
I did not anticipate
that it would be at a dinner table
filled with other people.
Confronting someone in front
of a large group of people,
it's never going to go well.
The only reason we had
that conversation is
'cause you confronted me
on how I gifted you
and what happened
with your gift.
That's the only reason
we had that conversation,
or it wouldn't have happened.
The gift let's put that aside.
It was the conversation afterwards
where I felt like "Don't go there,
or else I'm gonna bring
these rumors up about you."
I did not say anything.
I did not allude to that.
I am purposely not
using the word "swinger"
because I know if I use
the word "swinger,"
the conversation's gonna turn
into whether I'm a swinger or not.
And that's not what
this conversation is about.
It's about Lisa being judgmental.
This is the "Shoot the Messenger" game.
If I tell you something I heard,
it is not me saying it or me judging it.
I don't judge you.
I don't care enough to judge you.
I don't care enough to judge you.
-Well
-You know, that's rude.
I think it's hard for me to say
when you come out
of love and kindness,
because certainly we haven't
had love and kindness
-between us at all.
-Oh, my goodness.
Coming from you, I feel nothing
but the opposite of kindness.
My intent is always good.
I cannot help how you guys
perceive me.
I'm okay with how you perceive me.
You're comfortable with me
perceiving you as dismissive
and arrogant and also
a little bit crazy
because you said,
"I don't even know Heather."
-And of course you know me.
-Can we just start over?
If you take me being busy
as dismissive, I am sorry.
Lisa, how can you say,
"All I know of Heather
is that she was the good-time girl
that flashed her boobs"?
That was out of love and kindness
-to tell Miss Jen? Like
-Oh, my gosh.
I don't really remember her from school.
I think she was
the fun one in the dorm.
She was like, "Honor Code what?"
One time at a dorm.
One time at a dorm?
I would've been ejected from school.
That's what made it funny.
You can't graduate from BYU
and have flashed someone.
The story is flattering but false.
You don't remember me or know me,
but remember me flashing you?
I don't get it.
Keep coming. Who's next?
-Who's next?
-You cannot sit there
and say you come out
with love and kindness.
I have never done anything
mean to you.
Until you figure out what it is
that I trigger in you,
we can't have a good, solid
conversation and move forward.
Thumbs-up. There we go.
Thumbs up. [bleep] you.
Everything you do
is out of love and kindness.
That's what it meant.
You sent me a thumbs-up, and I go,
"Heather, you know, that's a [bleep] you."
Right before Meredith's birthday party,
I get a text from Lisa.
It's just kind of a check-in,
cover-her-ass text.
I'm not even sure why she's sending it.
She doesn't even know who I am.
Why is she texting me to see
if I'm gonna be there?
She probably won't even recognize me.
Two thumbs up is the "eff you,"
and that's a universal text code.
I didn't know that.
I'm sitting here apologizing
for a thumbs-up text.
Don't diminish the thumbs-up text.
I don't know if a thumbs-up
means, like, "eff you."
There's a good chance Heather's
thumbs-up was a "[bleep] you."
She knows what it meant,
and she meant what she sent.
Say what the thumbs-up text was.
-That's the problem.
-You know what?
Sis, it was a thumbs-up text.
It's an emoji.
When you sent her the text
with the thumbs-up emoji
-Yeah.
-was that a "[bleep] you"?
Absolutely.
You've had pent-up anger against me
for some reason I don't understand.
Listen, listen.
Heather would not care this much.
Totally, 100%. Yeah.
She wouldn't care if she
actually didn't care about you.
It's how I felt with Mary, right?
I wouldn't care. I care. I care.
It's because she cared.
If I made you feel bad, I'm sorry.
I know Lisa well enough to know
that she does not intentionally
wanna make people feel bad.
-[all speaking at once]
-But on the flip side,
if you did make her feel bad
If I ever made you feel bad,
I am genuinely sorry.
I am done with this right now.
I'm done. I'm done.
I am sorry. That is it.
I said I'm sorry, and I mean it.
We're gonna agree to really move forward.
-I'm saying this right now. Clean slate.
-Clean slate.
We're not gonna talk about it anymore.
Done.
[housewife] Next time on The Real
Housewives of Salt Lake City
-Okay, literally say a prayer.
-I already did.
I just need you to go easy on me.
I have a strong pull-out game.
Remember, confident, not cocky.
-When's the last time you went to church?
-Good question.
-This is my element!
-[congregation cheering]
I love God! Oh!
[chanting]
Grinder, grinder, grinder.
What?
Her vagina is in my face.
She can act however
she wants to act.
Just don't act that way in your house.
She wanted to have a sleepover
on Saturday.
That's definitely not happening.
Five of our 20 employees
are all pregnant for the first time.
So we wanna celebrate them
in a huge way.
We are horrified that you're pregnant
so young, but it's fine.
I took my father to her church
with Meredith.
What do you mean,
Meredith went to Mary's church?
She's just doing her,
and there's something cool about that.
If you really like Mary,
and you really like me,
don't you think there's a conflict?
-Well, for sure, but
-Bitch, vote.
I really wanna give Meredith
the benefit of the doubt,
but the first thing I see
is her over in the corner
with Mary M. Cosby. What?