The Slap (2011) s01e02 Episode Script
Anouk
Anouk didn't really see the slap when it happened.
Instead she was noticing something altogether more alarming.
Fucking animal! Hey, you touched my kid! The main thing is that Hugo's OK.
He's not OK, Anouk.
How the hell is he OK? Sanctimonious prick, I should've smashed his fuckin' skull in! Go home, have a bath, no-one'll even remember.
Move, move, move.
Gary! Give me the keys.
You're not driving this car! How can you defend that man? I'm not defending anybody! It wasn't your fault, OK? Maybe we shouldn't talk about this right now.
Now, later - what does that even matter, Anouk? I'm just saying, with Hugo, let's not escalate this.
You know what, give me a break, OK! We're all upset! I'll just drive, shall I? So that was full-on today.
Oh, full-on overreaction.
That's my friend Rosie for you.
Poor Aish.
She's been planning that party for months.
She must be furious.
I have to say, you were the only one who behaved brilliantly.
Thanks.
So Gary's a bit of a dickhead.
Creatively thwarted.
He's usually fine ish.
In fact, nobody's usually that bad.
You know, you don't seem the same age as them at all.
Well, I am.
See what was going on with Hector today with that blonde girl? I wasn't imagining it.
Was I? Sometimes I have no idea if you are even listening.
Oh, Jesus! Don't .
.
touch that.
Oh, Jesus! You're beeping my brain.
Mum, I'm at work.
Yeah, I know.
It's late.
Sorry, you OK? Yeah, I can Go work on your book.
What is it? Yep.
Go work on your book.
Yes.
Oh, Jesus, babe.
Hey.
I'm fine.
Just too much wine.
Can we call in sick? This is what happens when you don't eat enough or exercise.
I run for the tram.
Hi.
Help me with this? I brought you the papers.
Oh, please.
What's wrong? God, you look dreadful.
Let me feel your glands.
Leave my glands.
I'm just hung-over.
It was Hector's 40th yesterday.
So you did drugs? That's why you look like shit.
I didn't do drugs.
I wish I had done drugs.
They're all families now, Mum.
It's I don't think Aish has done a drug in years.
It's which schools, and how much sugar, which apparently is a drug now, and who grinds their own millet flour.
You been checking your breasts? Mmm.
Since I was 12.
You know what really freaks a kid out, Mum? Telling them they might be carrying the breast cancer gene when they don't even have any breasts yet.
Well, we're Ashkenazi, we do carry it.
Sorry.
I worked till 4:00am.
Well, if you didn't do that job $12 for a magazine?! Why's Marla not here? I fired her.
I thought you liked her.
Couldn't bear her.
Hovering over me with those beady eyes one more day.
Fine.
And she smelled.
Great.
Well, I'll get you another carer.
I don't need anybody, Anouk.
I'm perfectly content by myself.
We have a great time, myself and I.
You can't live alone here.
What if something happened? You live alone.
Yeah, but I'm not alone.
I'm happy, if that matters.
Well, he certainly takes up a lot of time.
Considering you think that I spend most of my time exporting stupidity to the masses, does the existence of Rhys really keep you awake at night? I'm calling the agency.
Would you prefer a man this time? Rachel.
Oh.
I brought you the yoghurt you love.
Oh, hey, Anouk.
How are you, baby? Terrible.
I just took Hugo to the doctor to check for inner-ear damage.
Why? What happened? Didn't Anouk tell you? I didn't think it was my place.
He's fine, right? Well, they didn't find anything, but, you know, they still I'm late.
Will somebody tell me what's happening? Bye, Mum.
It was a personality clash.
Well, she needs somebody who can look after her without expecting her to look after them, you know? They can't be needy.
Right, well, can you let me know when you find somebody? Thanks.
OK, so, last night I was thinking.
What does Bea do when she becomes suspicious of Joe's infidelity? I used to follow my boyfriend, and then once I caught him in a restaurant with a woman.
That just makes her seem like a psycho.
I only used to follow him as a joke.
OK.
Why doesn't she act like an adult and confront him with the truth? Coffees! What happened? The network wants the wedding moved to a different block.
Which block? You are kidding me.
If we're gonna move this here, that means you're gonna lose the credit card fraud story, and Joe's infidelity story that you're so keen on.
I know.
I trust you'll sort it, though, yeah? Let me know if you need anything, gang.
Anouk, I just finished those scripts.
I know.
Right.
Oh, can I fax what? Oh, I sent that to you ages ago.
If you're too busy, I can run that story meeting Look, would you please check in her file? Anouk.
Oh, for fuck's sake, Cooper! What? Hello? Monday.
You're meant to be in the screening room.
Sorry.
I'll email you the rest of the notes.
Sure.
No worries.
I've been trying to call you.
I've gotta get to this screening.
How are you feeling? We're moving the wedding.
Mmm.
You adrenaline junkie.
Mmm.
Mmm.
Oi.
You OK? Yeah, I'm just feeling a bit faint.
Really? Well, maybe you should go to the doctor.
I've got to get to this screening.
I have got to get to this Anouk Rosen? Yeah.
Aish, it's me.
Call.
Cooper, hi.
I can't make the story conference.
And how was this my fault, Mum? You know what, don't worry about it, I got it covered.
Anouk, thank Christ.
Can you do me a favour, watch the kids for an hour? Please? I suppose.
I've to go to the police station, tell 'em what happened.
Where's Aisha? Late.
Emergency.
Dog swallowed a condom.
Nouky, Nouky.
Adam, hello? Do you compute? Anouk's here.
I'm leaving.
Fish fingers for dinner.
Everything else is cut up.
You're coming straight back? What? Yes.
Yes.
And don't give 'em any more chocolate.
Melissa.
I'm starving, Anouk.
Here.
Eat this.
Thanks, Anouk! Oh, for fuck's sake, Cooper! This show sucks.
What was it like the first time you kissed Rhys? Can't remember, sweetheart, I was drunk.
You're funny, Anouk.
And that smells like totally burning.
Shit! Ah! Cooper, I've already tried that.
Yes, but it doesn't work! Thanks, mate.
Really appreciate it.
Well, they're just gonna have to get married without the long engagement.
Want a beer? Yep.
Talk soon.
Bye.
They really don't help you out in there.
I was saying, 'Mate, my cousin was just defending his son,' and the copper goes, 'Well, after you stood up, how many metres did you travel? Was that north-east or north-west?' Barely even looked at me.
'I'm not the guilty one here, mate.
' So, did Aisha ask you to make a statement? I've already said I don't want to be involved.
Well, you're Rosie's friend, you should tell 'em what you saw.
Frankly, I don't want to tell anybody what I saw yesterday.
Hi.
Hi.
How's that dog? Was just telling your husband how lucky he is to have you.
Huh.
Yeah, even go to the cops for your friends.
Oh, how was it? What do you think? I got your message.
You OK? Yeah.
I've gotta go.
No.
Come talk to me for a second.
Today has been a total nightmare.
I mean, first Rosie calls me, and then the police call Hector in.
I feel like I'm on this runaway train and I can't get off.
I can't believe that Hector went in there today.
His mum has been calling non-stop.
She is furious with me because she thinks that somehow I'm not supporting the family.
What they don't get is that Rosie is like my family.
I'm kind of relieved that I didn't see anything.
Aish? Oh, sorry, I've been rabbiting on.
Mum? Yes? I feel sick in the stomach.
Oh.
Poor you.
What did you have to eat? Cake.
We had a bit of cake.
Do you want to have a cold glass of water and lay down, and I'll be right in? OK.
Sorry.
What's wrong? Mmm I've gotta go.
Are you OK? I'm just tired.
Tell me.
There's nothing to tell.
Truly.
I've gotta reschedule a wedding.
Honestly, the fate of the world depends on it.
I'm calling you tomorrow.
Dylan.
How'd it go? Thank you.
I do appreciate it! Have you sent it to me yet? I'll see if I can get you a better parking spot.
Are you happy? Fine.
Email me the wedding rejig bits as well.
I'll take a look at that tonight for you.
OK.
Hello, authoress.
Who said you could look at that? Ay! I let you listen to my demos all the time.
That's your choice! Stop! Sit down! Be quiet.
Sit! 'Second night I ever saw Ruth the three of them sat under the street lamp at the abandoned petrol station' No, I am just too tired.
Be quiet! 'Hunched on concrete puddled with oil and grease, Violent Femmes on the Walkman, they shared Southern Comfort and Coke.
They liked the way it burned their throats.
When sun came up, they remembered sleep.
To Aida and Nicky, Ruth was broken glass, beautiful, but sharp' That's really enough, you snoop.
So that's you, Rosie and Aisha? Whatever you think.
How old were you guys? Aisha and I were about 20, I guess.
Rosie was 15.
I wish I'd known you then.
Were you even born? Hey.
I was three.
No.
So you're the one bonking the banker.
No, Rosie had all the bonks, including everyone else's.
I'm the one with vomit down her dress, of course.
Hey, come here.
Come here.
You need to eat.
I need to wee.
And I need to deal with a storyline.
He thinks he's a new 2IC.
What is that? Chicken soup.
You cook? Who knew? Chicken in a pot.
You're cooking and doing the washing-up? Sit.
Can't I take care of you for once? Sit.
Bones.
I like it.
See, I've got a fuck-off plan.
I was thinking that we should quit our jobs, and go travelling overseas.
Backpacking? Yeah.
We could go to La Tomatina, that thing that I was telling you about.
Where they throw tomatoes at you? Yeah.
It'd be crazy.
We could do the whole European thing.
We could ride bikes and sleep under bridges.
And eat bread and cheese and stay up all night and shag.
Hmm? Are you stoned? No, I'm just excited.
I think it's a beautiful idea.
If I was your age, then, you know I don't see what age has to do with it.
Maybe you should go with your friends.
Yeah, I don't want to go with my friends, I want to go with you.
You're too young to be tied down.
I'm not tied down.
That's the whole point of travelling, is that you're free.
I thought you wanted to do something different.
I just just trying to figure out if Yeah? Mmm? Where you're at right now.
I'm here cooking you soup.
The network is not happy.
I'm just gonna grab a coffee.
Can I do that? Have a cigarette while you're at it, 'cause you are fuckin' dead.
I quit.
Don't quit smoking now.
Have pity on me.
They've got big notes on that breakdown you did yesterday.
I haven't even signed off on that yet.
- Dylan sent it to me.
- Anouk Who authorised you to send the breakdown to Cooper? Uh Cooper did.
Cooper is not in charge of my script department, and neither are you! Hey.
Hey, I can't talk.
It's mental.
Present.
Thanks.
Lost my guitar lead.
Shit.
Hi.
Didn't know you were coming but duh.
Uh this is Richie.
Rhys invited us at Hector's barbecue.
Like I could forget it.
Oh, that was a horrible day.
I can't stop thinking about it.
It's been pretty horrible for Aisha.
Yeah.
I love Aisha.
She's she's just great.
I just love her.
Do you want a drink? Yeah, of course.
I'll buy you guys a drink.
Thanks.
Did they fight? I mean afterwards? I really don't think that's any of your business.
I guess you've known them for ages.
I was with Aisha when she met Hector.
Thanks for coming.
⪠I watch sometimes in broken light ⪠⪠The perfect lines of promised nights ⪠⪠And I've taken a few ⪠⪠And buried more ⪠⪠Among the done and wasted days ⪠⪠Leaving marks for new travellers to see ⪠⪠The sin that walks out front of me ⪠Do you think Hector's depressed? Is that what he tells you? I wouldn't buy it, personally.
No.
I don't even like him.
⪠Leaving marks for new travellers to see ⪠⪠The sin that walks out front of me.
⪠Thanks.
Cheers.
This next song is for my beautiful girl, Anouk.
Anouk? Anouk, where are you? Whoo! ⪠Put me in your suitcase ⪠⪠And let me help you pack ⪠⪠'Cause you're never coming back ⪠⪠No, you're never coming back ⪠⪠Cook me in your breakfast ⪠⪠And put me on your plate ⪠⪠'Cause you know I taste great ⪠⪠Yeah, you know I taste great ⪠⪠At the hop it's grease-ball heaven ⪠⪠With candy pants and Archie too ⪠⪠Put me in your dry dream ⪠⪠Put me in your wet ⪠⪠If you haven't yet ⪠⪠If you haven't yet.
⪠Vodka, Nouk? What's her name? Hector's pricktease? Oh, shh.
Don't.
Hey, do you guys want a drink? Do you want a drink? Yeah.
Right.
I really want to talk to you.
Huh? Why aren't you drinking? Oh, you two together! Come on, let's get a little bit of a snappy.
Gorgeous little things, come on.
Oi! Hi, Mum.
How you doing? Did they send somebody over? No? Did they ring? Oh, just at a party.
Hold on a sec.
Is that better? Do you need anything? What? 'Cause I am sick of talking about it already.
He did not get bashed, Mum.
Yep.
Yep.
Yep, OK.
Bye.
Hey, babe, come and sit with us.
Mmm.
See you tomorrow.
Why can't you just stay? Have a drink with us.
My mum's run out of her medication.
I've gotta go to the chemist.
At 11:00 at night? And I've got five scripts to read, and that fucknob Dylan wants my job.
Oh, work, work, work.
Come on, stay.
Hang out with us.
I can't listen to this music.
Do you want me to come with you? You're having fun.
It's your big night.
So have fun with me.
Rhys just not feeling fun right now.
I've gotta go.
OK, well, I'll come over after, OK? See how you feel.
You might just want to pass out here.
Hi.
I needed that medicine last night.
Then maybe you shouldn't fire everybody.
You're lucky I even found you a new carer.
His name's Ben.
Come by some time this afternoon.
But I'm warning you, you're scraping the bottom of the barrel.
Good.
Why is that good? Why is it good to be so difficult that you're left with no options? You begged me to move to Melbourne and now I never see you.
I have to work, Mum! I can't take care of everybody.
Can barely remember my name at the end of the week! Rosie has time to see me.
She has Hugo, a lot of stress right now.
And she's not even my daughter.
Yeah, it's all about Rosie.
You just always hated sharing with her.
Yes, I know, you've told me.
I'm selfish.
Do you want a cinnamon roll? No.
You you don't even have five minutes to have a cup of tea? What's this? Some treats for you.
Oh.
Somebody at work said it's Purim, apparently.
What do TV people know about Purim? Apparently nothing.
Gee.
Since when did I give a shit about Purim anyway? I can't eat this stuff.
This stuff's it's infectious.
You have to take it back.
I can't take it back.
It's cheese.
You can't take cheese back.
Mum, it's burning.
Oh, shit.
God! Let me, let me! Oh, shit.
Um It spurted out.
It's fine.
It's fine.
It's fine.
Let me help.
Promise me if I get any worse than this, you'll put me down.
This isn't bad.
It's fine.
I mean it.
Promise me you'll shoot me.
Or inject me.
Something.
Don't leave me with strangers.
Mum, do we have to talk about this right now? Here, I'm just going to wash Promise.
How can I promise something like that? I can't promise that.
I'll ask Rosie, then.
Rosie's a pacifist, Mum.
She's not gonna kill you.
Unless she loves you to death.
You don't understand her at all.
I'm just gonna get you some knickers.
Anouk? Uh 506.
Tania, that's yours.
Well, that's our casting issue.
We went and got You need to get here on time.
My mother had an emergency.
No offence, but I have no interest in your mother.
Yeah, I know, I'm a dickhead.
Oh, by the way, this Ep 327 story you've outlined for Rhys .
.
way too complicated.
Why, because he has to walk and talk at the same time? He can't play subtext.
Maybe you shouldn't underestimate him? Yeah? Maybe you shouldn't be sleeping with him.
What do you reckon, Dylan? Can I see you outside for a sec, Cooper? What the fuck?! Look, mate, whatever's happening with you right now, all I see is you're letting things slip.
You're losing focus.
People feel it, I feel it.
You're meant to be on set! Sorry, mate, I'm really sorry.
I guess he was looking after your Mum too.
Excuse me? We are not a shitting ground for your midlife crisis, Anouk.
And this thing with Rhys Come on, it's desperate.
Fuck you! You know what, I'll cross that concern off your list, 'cause I quit! Can't quit, you're on contract.
Just watch me.
Fine! Fuck you too! Rosie.
Didn't know that you were coming.
Well, Aish said you needed to talk.
Yeah, I did say that.
Did you know a new carer showed up at Rachel's? Yeah, I organised a new carer.
You know how she hates having Feel free if you wanna organise something else.
Hector was late.
Tag team Beautiful ladies, I so need a drink.
Excuse you! Wow, how old were they? God knows.
Could've been 16, looking like hookers.
Probably don't even exist to them.
Well, I do exist, and I want it acknowledged when they crash into me.
So, what's the big news? I quit my job.
Oh, you didn't.
You did? Why? Because you can't undo telling somebody to go and fuck themselves, when they happen to be your boss.
What will you do for money? I've got weeks of holiday pay owing, but, you know I'll probably regret it, but hey.
You gonna write the novel? Actually, I don't know what I'm gonna do, Aish.
What do you mean you don't know? I don't know.
Is this the novel that's about us? Are you really gonna write that thing? Yeah, I've already started writing it.
It's about three girls who fuck a lot of guys to figure themselves out.
I'm joking.
Oh, fuck me.
What a week.
You don't know the half of it.
I know.
We're pressing charges against Harry.
Jesus, can I I so don't wanna talk about this.
Well, you can't keep avoiding it, Anouk.
You want my opinion? I don't think you should've gone to the police.
Can we please change the subject? My son was bashed.
Bashed?! Harry did not 'bash' Hugo.
'Bashed'.
That's like a kid's word.
He hit him, he assaulted him.
It's illegal.
The police are taking it very seriously.
Please say something to her.
It's her choice.
Fine, then.
I'm gonna be a witness for Harry and Sandi.
Oh! You saw that man assault Hugo.
You want to know what I saw? I saw Harry reprimand Hugo.
You said you didn't see anything.
No-one deserves to be hit, Anouk, let alone a child.
Well, we all wanted to slap Hugo that day.
That's a horrible thing to say.
And it's not horrible that she might ruin Harry and Sandi's lives just because Gary always has to be the victim? Just shut it, Anouk.
Or is it that he's bored? Is that it? Gary's feeling a bit bored, he wants a bit of drama in his life.
Hugo's problem is not that Harry gave him a slap.
Hugo's problem is that you and Gary let him act like an absolute brat.
That's enough! I've never seen you discipline him.
You never give him any boundaries, he's learnt he can act like a monster That's enough! .
.
and get away with it! You've never been interested in our children.
You made that clear over the years, so don't assume you can start being an authority now.
Yeah.
What do I know about kids? I'm so sorry, Rosie.
You really upset me, Nouk.
I should've just kept my mouth shut.
Brought you some stuff too.
Gary's building Hugo a cubby.
Mum's been going on about euthanasia.
She always does.
Does she? Yeah.
She likes to feel in control.
Thanks, Nouk.
Yeah, us Rosens hate being out of control.
I know you don't like how close we are but, you know, I I can help out with things, you know.
As as stuff goes on.
I know you will.
I just feel like I should do it.
She would love that.
She thinks I'm selfish.
She thinks you're smart, talented and funny.
And sometimes you are selfish.
I'm pregnant, Rosie.
Aisha didn't say.
She doesn't know.
I haven't told anybody.
Wow, hey? I didn't think you wanted to.
I thought I thought you weren't going to do that.
Well, I wasn't trying, if that's what you mean.
But now, you know Well, it's obviously my last chance.
I don't want to get stuck in some kind of perpetual adolescence.
And Rhys he's fun.
And kind.
And I know he's young.
God, he's so young.
But I think he'd probably make a great father.
And he loves me.
And I don't have to be the same kind of mother that Rachel was.
You know, which is always what I thought would happen.
And I'd be too tough on it, push it away, and somehow turn it into this terrified Don't they say having a child makes you more forgiving of your mother? Well.
I could use that.
And maybe it would help us.
What do you mean? You and Aisha.
You're so close with your kids, and sometimes I'm sick of being the one that's not a part of that, and I feel like you just look at me like Pfft! I don't know.
How am I meant to be a great writer if I haven't had that experience? Oh, fuck! Fuck, why does it have to be so fucking hard to make a decision? All I do all day is make decisions.
It could be the best thing that's ever happened.
In a way.
Maybe.
You sound like you're trying to convince yourself.
I am.
I'm trying to convince myself.
Listen to me, Anouk.
Don't worry about what you think you should do.
What do you want to do? I want to write my book.
Can I bum one of those? There you go.
You alright? Do you need anything? Some juice? I just want to sleep.
Yeah.
Thank you.
Aish? I'm so sorry I didn't tell you.
Me too.
I'm sorry too.
Go to sleep.
Hey.
Hey.
Did Aisha ring you? No.
I found out myself.
I'm sorry.
I didn't know what to say.
Oh, it doesn't matter.
We'll do it our own way.
I love you.
What are you talking about? The baby.
It hit me last night.
I mean, you haven't been drinking, you've been vomiting, and your boobs are huge.
I'm not pregnant.
There's not gonna be any baby.
Why? It wouldn't have worked.
What do you mean? I knew you'd convince me somehow.
We didn't even talk about it.
You know? You should go to Tomatina.
That's what you want to do.
It's not your decision.
I mean, didn't I have a say? I'm sorry.
It was my decision.
I don't have a job, my mother's sick.
Please don't cry.
I'm not crying.
I guess you always had a way out.
Rhys.
You could just say, 'Oh, he's too young.
' Oh, I never I don't even give a shit about our age difference! Oh, bullshit! I'm so sorry.
I did this for us.
You're not ready for this.
Don't you dare tell me what I'm ready for.
How the fuck would you know?! I mean, how the fuck would you know? Are you staying? Yeah.
Oh.
Fucking write, then.
King of the world! You're arresting me for being at a barbecue? We've had a complaint made by a person who was also in attendance.
If it goes to court, then I have to say what I saw.
What did you see? This court case thing is real.
I mean, what do I do? I thought you were a woman of her own mind.
And I thought you were a man who understood loyalty.
I called to say that Current Affair are interested in this.
What? Get down on my knees in front of that pisshead Skip, and his dirty wife? So why are you here?
Instead she was noticing something altogether more alarming.
Fucking animal! Hey, you touched my kid! The main thing is that Hugo's OK.
He's not OK, Anouk.
How the hell is he OK? Sanctimonious prick, I should've smashed his fuckin' skull in! Go home, have a bath, no-one'll even remember.
Move, move, move.
Gary! Give me the keys.
You're not driving this car! How can you defend that man? I'm not defending anybody! It wasn't your fault, OK? Maybe we shouldn't talk about this right now.
Now, later - what does that even matter, Anouk? I'm just saying, with Hugo, let's not escalate this.
You know what, give me a break, OK! We're all upset! I'll just drive, shall I? So that was full-on today.
Oh, full-on overreaction.
That's my friend Rosie for you.
Poor Aish.
She's been planning that party for months.
She must be furious.
I have to say, you were the only one who behaved brilliantly.
Thanks.
So Gary's a bit of a dickhead.
Creatively thwarted.
He's usually fine ish.
In fact, nobody's usually that bad.
You know, you don't seem the same age as them at all.
Well, I am.
See what was going on with Hector today with that blonde girl? I wasn't imagining it.
Was I? Sometimes I have no idea if you are even listening.
Oh, Jesus! Don't .
.
touch that.
Oh, Jesus! You're beeping my brain.
Mum, I'm at work.
Yeah, I know.
It's late.
Sorry, you OK? Yeah, I can Go work on your book.
What is it? Yep.
Go work on your book.
Yes.
Oh, Jesus, babe.
Hey.
I'm fine.
Just too much wine.
Can we call in sick? This is what happens when you don't eat enough or exercise.
I run for the tram.
Hi.
Help me with this? I brought you the papers.
Oh, please.
What's wrong? God, you look dreadful.
Let me feel your glands.
Leave my glands.
I'm just hung-over.
It was Hector's 40th yesterday.
So you did drugs? That's why you look like shit.
I didn't do drugs.
I wish I had done drugs.
They're all families now, Mum.
It's I don't think Aish has done a drug in years.
It's which schools, and how much sugar, which apparently is a drug now, and who grinds their own millet flour.
You been checking your breasts? Mmm.
Since I was 12.
You know what really freaks a kid out, Mum? Telling them they might be carrying the breast cancer gene when they don't even have any breasts yet.
Well, we're Ashkenazi, we do carry it.
Sorry.
I worked till 4:00am.
Well, if you didn't do that job $12 for a magazine?! Why's Marla not here? I fired her.
I thought you liked her.
Couldn't bear her.
Hovering over me with those beady eyes one more day.
Fine.
And she smelled.
Great.
Well, I'll get you another carer.
I don't need anybody, Anouk.
I'm perfectly content by myself.
We have a great time, myself and I.
You can't live alone here.
What if something happened? You live alone.
Yeah, but I'm not alone.
I'm happy, if that matters.
Well, he certainly takes up a lot of time.
Considering you think that I spend most of my time exporting stupidity to the masses, does the existence of Rhys really keep you awake at night? I'm calling the agency.
Would you prefer a man this time? Rachel.
Oh.
I brought you the yoghurt you love.
Oh, hey, Anouk.
How are you, baby? Terrible.
I just took Hugo to the doctor to check for inner-ear damage.
Why? What happened? Didn't Anouk tell you? I didn't think it was my place.
He's fine, right? Well, they didn't find anything, but, you know, they still I'm late.
Will somebody tell me what's happening? Bye, Mum.
It was a personality clash.
Well, she needs somebody who can look after her without expecting her to look after them, you know? They can't be needy.
Right, well, can you let me know when you find somebody? Thanks.
OK, so, last night I was thinking.
What does Bea do when she becomes suspicious of Joe's infidelity? I used to follow my boyfriend, and then once I caught him in a restaurant with a woman.
That just makes her seem like a psycho.
I only used to follow him as a joke.
OK.
Why doesn't she act like an adult and confront him with the truth? Coffees! What happened? The network wants the wedding moved to a different block.
Which block? You are kidding me.
If we're gonna move this here, that means you're gonna lose the credit card fraud story, and Joe's infidelity story that you're so keen on.
I know.
I trust you'll sort it, though, yeah? Let me know if you need anything, gang.
Anouk, I just finished those scripts.
I know.
Right.
Oh, can I fax what? Oh, I sent that to you ages ago.
If you're too busy, I can run that story meeting Look, would you please check in her file? Anouk.
Oh, for fuck's sake, Cooper! What? Hello? Monday.
You're meant to be in the screening room.
Sorry.
I'll email you the rest of the notes.
Sure.
No worries.
I've been trying to call you.
I've gotta get to this screening.
How are you feeling? We're moving the wedding.
Mmm.
You adrenaline junkie.
Mmm.
Mmm.
Oi.
You OK? Yeah, I'm just feeling a bit faint.
Really? Well, maybe you should go to the doctor.
I've got to get to this screening.
I have got to get to this Anouk Rosen? Yeah.
Aish, it's me.
Call.
Cooper, hi.
I can't make the story conference.
And how was this my fault, Mum? You know what, don't worry about it, I got it covered.
Anouk, thank Christ.
Can you do me a favour, watch the kids for an hour? Please? I suppose.
I've to go to the police station, tell 'em what happened.
Where's Aisha? Late.
Emergency.
Dog swallowed a condom.
Nouky, Nouky.
Adam, hello? Do you compute? Anouk's here.
I'm leaving.
Fish fingers for dinner.
Everything else is cut up.
You're coming straight back? What? Yes.
Yes.
And don't give 'em any more chocolate.
Melissa.
I'm starving, Anouk.
Here.
Eat this.
Thanks, Anouk! Oh, for fuck's sake, Cooper! This show sucks.
What was it like the first time you kissed Rhys? Can't remember, sweetheart, I was drunk.
You're funny, Anouk.
And that smells like totally burning.
Shit! Ah! Cooper, I've already tried that.
Yes, but it doesn't work! Thanks, mate.
Really appreciate it.
Well, they're just gonna have to get married without the long engagement.
Want a beer? Yep.
Talk soon.
Bye.
They really don't help you out in there.
I was saying, 'Mate, my cousin was just defending his son,' and the copper goes, 'Well, after you stood up, how many metres did you travel? Was that north-east or north-west?' Barely even looked at me.
'I'm not the guilty one here, mate.
' So, did Aisha ask you to make a statement? I've already said I don't want to be involved.
Well, you're Rosie's friend, you should tell 'em what you saw.
Frankly, I don't want to tell anybody what I saw yesterday.
Hi.
Hi.
How's that dog? Was just telling your husband how lucky he is to have you.
Huh.
Yeah, even go to the cops for your friends.
Oh, how was it? What do you think? I got your message.
You OK? Yeah.
I've gotta go.
No.
Come talk to me for a second.
Today has been a total nightmare.
I mean, first Rosie calls me, and then the police call Hector in.
I feel like I'm on this runaway train and I can't get off.
I can't believe that Hector went in there today.
His mum has been calling non-stop.
She is furious with me because she thinks that somehow I'm not supporting the family.
What they don't get is that Rosie is like my family.
I'm kind of relieved that I didn't see anything.
Aish? Oh, sorry, I've been rabbiting on.
Mum? Yes? I feel sick in the stomach.
Oh.
Poor you.
What did you have to eat? Cake.
We had a bit of cake.
Do you want to have a cold glass of water and lay down, and I'll be right in? OK.
Sorry.
What's wrong? Mmm I've gotta go.
Are you OK? I'm just tired.
Tell me.
There's nothing to tell.
Truly.
I've gotta reschedule a wedding.
Honestly, the fate of the world depends on it.
I'm calling you tomorrow.
Dylan.
How'd it go? Thank you.
I do appreciate it! Have you sent it to me yet? I'll see if I can get you a better parking spot.
Are you happy? Fine.
Email me the wedding rejig bits as well.
I'll take a look at that tonight for you.
OK.
Hello, authoress.
Who said you could look at that? Ay! I let you listen to my demos all the time.
That's your choice! Stop! Sit down! Be quiet.
Sit! 'Second night I ever saw Ruth the three of them sat under the street lamp at the abandoned petrol station' No, I am just too tired.
Be quiet! 'Hunched on concrete puddled with oil and grease, Violent Femmes on the Walkman, they shared Southern Comfort and Coke.
They liked the way it burned their throats.
When sun came up, they remembered sleep.
To Aida and Nicky, Ruth was broken glass, beautiful, but sharp' That's really enough, you snoop.
So that's you, Rosie and Aisha? Whatever you think.
How old were you guys? Aisha and I were about 20, I guess.
Rosie was 15.
I wish I'd known you then.
Were you even born? Hey.
I was three.
No.
So you're the one bonking the banker.
No, Rosie had all the bonks, including everyone else's.
I'm the one with vomit down her dress, of course.
Hey, come here.
Come here.
You need to eat.
I need to wee.
And I need to deal with a storyline.
He thinks he's a new 2IC.
What is that? Chicken soup.
You cook? Who knew? Chicken in a pot.
You're cooking and doing the washing-up? Sit.
Can't I take care of you for once? Sit.
Bones.
I like it.
See, I've got a fuck-off plan.
I was thinking that we should quit our jobs, and go travelling overseas.
Backpacking? Yeah.
We could go to La Tomatina, that thing that I was telling you about.
Where they throw tomatoes at you? Yeah.
It'd be crazy.
We could do the whole European thing.
We could ride bikes and sleep under bridges.
And eat bread and cheese and stay up all night and shag.
Hmm? Are you stoned? No, I'm just excited.
I think it's a beautiful idea.
If I was your age, then, you know I don't see what age has to do with it.
Maybe you should go with your friends.
Yeah, I don't want to go with my friends, I want to go with you.
You're too young to be tied down.
I'm not tied down.
That's the whole point of travelling, is that you're free.
I thought you wanted to do something different.
I just just trying to figure out if Yeah? Mmm? Where you're at right now.
I'm here cooking you soup.
The network is not happy.
I'm just gonna grab a coffee.
Can I do that? Have a cigarette while you're at it, 'cause you are fuckin' dead.
I quit.
Don't quit smoking now.
Have pity on me.
They've got big notes on that breakdown you did yesterday.
I haven't even signed off on that yet.
- Dylan sent it to me.
- Anouk Who authorised you to send the breakdown to Cooper? Uh Cooper did.
Cooper is not in charge of my script department, and neither are you! Hey.
Hey, I can't talk.
It's mental.
Present.
Thanks.
Lost my guitar lead.
Shit.
Hi.
Didn't know you were coming but duh.
Uh this is Richie.
Rhys invited us at Hector's barbecue.
Like I could forget it.
Oh, that was a horrible day.
I can't stop thinking about it.
It's been pretty horrible for Aisha.
Yeah.
I love Aisha.
She's she's just great.
I just love her.
Do you want a drink? Yeah, of course.
I'll buy you guys a drink.
Thanks.
Did they fight? I mean afterwards? I really don't think that's any of your business.
I guess you've known them for ages.
I was with Aisha when she met Hector.
Thanks for coming.
⪠I watch sometimes in broken light ⪠⪠The perfect lines of promised nights ⪠⪠And I've taken a few ⪠⪠And buried more ⪠⪠Among the done and wasted days ⪠⪠Leaving marks for new travellers to see ⪠⪠The sin that walks out front of me ⪠Do you think Hector's depressed? Is that what he tells you? I wouldn't buy it, personally.
No.
I don't even like him.
⪠Leaving marks for new travellers to see ⪠⪠The sin that walks out front of me.
⪠Thanks.
Cheers.
This next song is for my beautiful girl, Anouk.
Anouk? Anouk, where are you? Whoo! ⪠Put me in your suitcase ⪠⪠And let me help you pack ⪠⪠'Cause you're never coming back ⪠⪠No, you're never coming back ⪠⪠Cook me in your breakfast ⪠⪠And put me on your plate ⪠⪠'Cause you know I taste great ⪠⪠Yeah, you know I taste great ⪠⪠At the hop it's grease-ball heaven ⪠⪠With candy pants and Archie too ⪠⪠Put me in your dry dream ⪠⪠Put me in your wet ⪠⪠If you haven't yet ⪠⪠If you haven't yet.
⪠Vodka, Nouk? What's her name? Hector's pricktease? Oh, shh.
Don't.
Hey, do you guys want a drink? Do you want a drink? Yeah.
Right.
I really want to talk to you.
Huh? Why aren't you drinking? Oh, you two together! Come on, let's get a little bit of a snappy.
Gorgeous little things, come on.
Oi! Hi, Mum.
How you doing? Did they send somebody over? No? Did they ring? Oh, just at a party.
Hold on a sec.
Is that better? Do you need anything? What? 'Cause I am sick of talking about it already.
He did not get bashed, Mum.
Yep.
Yep.
Yep, OK.
Bye.
Hey, babe, come and sit with us.
Mmm.
See you tomorrow.
Why can't you just stay? Have a drink with us.
My mum's run out of her medication.
I've gotta go to the chemist.
At 11:00 at night? And I've got five scripts to read, and that fucknob Dylan wants my job.
Oh, work, work, work.
Come on, stay.
Hang out with us.
I can't listen to this music.
Do you want me to come with you? You're having fun.
It's your big night.
So have fun with me.
Rhys just not feeling fun right now.
I've gotta go.
OK, well, I'll come over after, OK? See how you feel.
You might just want to pass out here.
Hi.
I needed that medicine last night.
Then maybe you shouldn't fire everybody.
You're lucky I even found you a new carer.
His name's Ben.
Come by some time this afternoon.
But I'm warning you, you're scraping the bottom of the barrel.
Good.
Why is that good? Why is it good to be so difficult that you're left with no options? You begged me to move to Melbourne and now I never see you.
I have to work, Mum! I can't take care of everybody.
Can barely remember my name at the end of the week! Rosie has time to see me.
She has Hugo, a lot of stress right now.
And she's not even my daughter.
Yeah, it's all about Rosie.
You just always hated sharing with her.
Yes, I know, you've told me.
I'm selfish.
Do you want a cinnamon roll? No.
You you don't even have five minutes to have a cup of tea? What's this? Some treats for you.
Oh.
Somebody at work said it's Purim, apparently.
What do TV people know about Purim? Apparently nothing.
Gee.
Since when did I give a shit about Purim anyway? I can't eat this stuff.
This stuff's it's infectious.
You have to take it back.
I can't take it back.
It's cheese.
You can't take cheese back.
Mum, it's burning.
Oh, shit.
God! Let me, let me! Oh, shit.
Um It spurted out.
It's fine.
It's fine.
It's fine.
Let me help.
Promise me if I get any worse than this, you'll put me down.
This isn't bad.
It's fine.
I mean it.
Promise me you'll shoot me.
Or inject me.
Something.
Don't leave me with strangers.
Mum, do we have to talk about this right now? Here, I'm just going to wash Promise.
How can I promise something like that? I can't promise that.
I'll ask Rosie, then.
Rosie's a pacifist, Mum.
She's not gonna kill you.
Unless she loves you to death.
You don't understand her at all.
I'm just gonna get you some knickers.
Anouk? Uh 506.
Tania, that's yours.
Well, that's our casting issue.
We went and got You need to get here on time.
My mother had an emergency.
No offence, but I have no interest in your mother.
Yeah, I know, I'm a dickhead.
Oh, by the way, this Ep 327 story you've outlined for Rhys .
.
way too complicated.
Why, because he has to walk and talk at the same time? He can't play subtext.
Maybe you shouldn't underestimate him? Yeah? Maybe you shouldn't be sleeping with him.
What do you reckon, Dylan? Can I see you outside for a sec, Cooper? What the fuck?! Look, mate, whatever's happening with you right now, all I see is you're letting things slip.
You're losing focus.
People feel it, I feel it.
You're meant to be on set! Sorry, mate, I'm really sorry.
I guess he was looking after your Mum too.
Excuse me? We are not a shitting ground for your midlife crisis, Anouk.
And this thing with Rhys Come on, it's desperate.
Fuck you! You know what, I'll cross that concern off your list, 'cause I quit! Can't quit, you're on contract.
Just watch me.
Fine! Fuck you too! Rosie.
Didn't know that you were coming.
Well, Aish said you needed to talk.
Yeah, I did say that.
Did you know a new carer showed up at Rachel's? Yeah, I organised a new carer.
You know how she hates having Feel free if you wanna organise something else.
Hector was late.
Tag team Beautiful ladies, I so need a drink.
Excuse you! Wow, how old were they? God knows.
Could've been 16, looking like hookers.
Probably don't even exist to them.
Well, I do exist, and I want it acknowledged when they crash into me.
So, what's the big news? I quit my job.
Oh, you didn't.
You did? Why? Because you can't undo telling somebody to go and fuck themselves, when they happen to be your boss.
What will you do for money? I've got weeks of holiday pay owing, but, you know I'll probably regret it, but hey.
You gonna write the novel? Actually, I don't know what I'm gonna do, Aish.
What do you mean you don't know? I don't know.
Is this the novel that's about us? Are you really gonna write that thing? Yeah, I've already started writing it.
It's about three girls who fuck a lot of guys to figure themselves out.
I'm joking.
Oh, fuck me.
What a week.
You don't know the half of it.
I know.
We're pressing charges against Harry.
Jesus, can I I so don't wanna talk about this.
Well, you can't keep avoiding it, Anouk.
You want my opinion? I don't think you should've gone to the police.
Can we please change the subject? My son was bashed.
Bashed?! Harry did not 'bash' Hugo.
'Bashed'.
That's like a kid's word.
He hit him, he assaulted him.
It's illegal.
The police are taking it very seriously.
Please say something to her.
It's her choice.
Fine, then.
I'm gonna be a witness for Harry and Sandi.
Oh! You saw that man assault Hugo.
You want to know what I saw? I saw Harry reprimand Hugo.
You said you didn't see anything.
No-one deserves to be hit, Anouk, let alone a child.
Well, we all wanted to slap Hugo that day.
That's a horrible thing to say.
And it's not horrible that she might ruin Harry and Sandi's lives just because Gary always has to be the victim? Just shut it, Anouk.
Or is it that he's bored? Is that it? Gary's feeling a bit bored, he wants a bit of drama in his life.
Hugo's problem is not that Harry gave him a slap.
Hugo's problem is that you and Gary let him act like an absolute brat.
That's enough! I've never seen you discipline him.
You never give him any boundaries, he's learnt he can act like a monster That's enough! .
.
and get away with it! You've never been interested in our children.
You made that clear over the years, so don't assume you can start being an authority now.
Yeah.
What do I know about kids? I'm so sorry, Rosie.
You really upset me, Nouk.
I should've just kept my mouth shut.
Brought you some stuff too.
Gary's building Hugo a cubby.
Mum's been going on about euthanasia.
She always does.
Does she? Yeah.
She likes to feel in control.
Thanks, Nouk.
Yeah, us Rosens hate being out of control.
I know you don't like how close we are but, you know, I I can help out with things, you know.
As as stuff goes on.
I know you will.
I just feel like I should do it.
She would love that.
She thinks I'm selfish.
She thinks you're smart, talented and funny.
And sometimes you are selfish.
I'm pregnant, Rosie.
Aisha didn't say.
She doesn't know.
I haven't told anybody.
Wow, hey? I didn't think you wanted to.
I thought I thought you weren't going to do that.
Well, I wasn't trying, if that's what you mean.
But now, you know Well, it's obviously my last chance.
I don't want to get stuck in some kind of perpetual adolescence.
And Rhys he's fun.
And kind.
And I know he's young.
God, he's so young.
But I think he'd probably make a great father.
And he loves me.
And I don't have to be the same kind of mother that Rachel was.
You know, which is always what I thought would happen.
And I'd be too tough on it, push it away, and somehow turn it into this terrified Don't they say having a child makes you more forgiving of your mother? Well.
I could use that.
And maybe it would help us.
What do you mean? You and Aisha.
You're so close with your kids, and sometimes I'm sick of being the one that's not a part of that, and I feel like you just look at me like Pfft! I don't know.
How am I meant to be a great writer if I haven't had that experience? Oh, fuck! Fuck, why does it have to be so fucking hard to make a decision? All I do all day is make decisions.
It could be the best thing that's ever happened.
In a way.
Maybe.
You sound like you're trying to convince yourself.
I am.
I'm trying to convince myself.
Listen to me, Anouk.
Don't worry about what you think you should do.
What do you want to do? I want to write my book.
Can I bum one of those? There you go.
You alright? Do you need anything? Some juice? I just want to sleep.
Yeah.
Thank you.
Aish? I'm so sorry I didn't tell you.
Me too.
I'm sorry too.
Go to sleep.
Hey.
Hey.
Did Aisha ring you? No.
I found out myself.
I'm sorry.
I didn't know what to say.
Oh, it doesn't matter.
We'll do it our own way.
I love you.
What are you talking about? The baby.
It hit me last night.
I mean, you haven't been drinking, you've been vomiting, and your boobs are huge.
I'm not pregnant.
There's not gonna be any baby.
Why? It wouldn't have worked.
What do you mean? I knew you'd convince me somehow.
We didn't even talk about it.
You know? You should go to Tomatina.
That's what you want to do.
It's not your decision.
I mean, didn't I have a say? I'm sorry.
It was my decision.
I don't have a job, my mother's sick.
Please don't cry.
I'm not crying.
I guess you always had a way out.
Rhys.
You could just say, 'Oh, he's too young.
' Oh, I never I don't even give a shit about our age difference! Oh, bullshit! I'm so sorry.
I did this for us.
You're not ready for this.
Don't you dare tell me what I'm ready for.
How the fuck would you know?! I mean, how the fuck would you know? Are you staying? Yeah.
Oh.
Fucking write, then.
King of the world! You're arresting me for being at a barbecue? We've had a complaint made by a person who was also in attendance.
If it goes to court, then I have to say what I saw.
What did you see? This court case thing is real.
I mean, what do I do? I thought you were a woman of her own mind.
And I thought you were a man who understood loyalty.
I called to say that Current Affair are interested in this.
What? Get down on my knees in front of that pisshead Skip, and his dirty wife? So why are you here?