Ash vs Evil Dead (2015) s01e03 Episode Script

1 Sometimes what you think you saw, it's exactly what you saw.
I get that you wanna save your dad Oh! Mom, please! I hate whatever did this.
Kelly, if you really hate what did this, you should come with us.
We have to get that book translated and find the phrase that'll put the lid back on all this bullshit.
Ah yeah, hi.
I came in there many years ago.
We chatted about a particular book.
Can I have a look at that? Are you the one behind all this? Ash was here, wasn't he? Go to hell.
Then we'll talk.
I think we'll talk here.
Mm, Ash was here? Did he have The Book with him? Oh, questions, questions.
Can't we have some quiet time? Ow, ow! Stop that you annoying bitch! Ow! Fuck off! Answer me.
All your time, spent searching for the book.
You haven't learned a thing, you! I've learned you can always make things more painful.
Do you like that? No, please.
- No, no, no, no! - Ah.
No, no! No! Okay, now the guy who runs this place is kind of an odd duck.
So, no eye contact, no conversations.
Book me, Pablo.
Are you sure that he can read it? Yeah, he said he could, but you know, that was years ago.
First time I came here, I was looking for an authentic Viking helmet.
I was bangin' this freaky chick who got me way into role-playing.
I don't wanna hear this.
Anyway, I told him about the book, and he freaked out.
He said he can translate it, no problemo.
I'm happy that we're sendin' evil back where it came from, that's for sure, but it makes me a little sad that we're already breakin' up the team.
Hey, I was toyin' with a nickname for us The Ghost Beaters.
That is so fucking bad.
Yeah, buddy, I gotta tell ya, that's probably the worst thing I've ever heard, but look, it doesn't matter.
At heart, me, I'm an alone wolf.
- A lone wolf.
- Exactly.
Doesn't it ever get old? Bein' alone? Nobody to help you? No, of course not.
All right look, if I get this done quick enough, we might have time to stop for churros.
And look, that's not a racist thing, Pablo, that's just a great dessert.
Okay.
You know I'm not Mexican, right? That's the spirit.
Sit tight, watch the wheels.
Back in a jiff.
Yeesh.
Hello? Anybody home? Guy with a very special book, lookin' to save the world with it.
Ah, there you are.
How you doin', man? Good to see you again.
Ah, sorry, I was just, uh, tending to some-some legal matters beyond my control, uh May I help you, sir? I'd rather get help from her.
Thank you for your assistance, Mr.
Hawkins.
I'll be in touch.
Oh, yeah.
- Hey, it's Fisher.
- Fisher.
I need you to send me that sketch, from the trailer park murders.
that Well, Boyle doesn't have to know that I asked.
He's going to kill you.
Oh my God, Lee, please just help a girl out.
You owe me big time.
Thank you, I'll buy you a beer.
Come on.
Lee, come on, come on.
Come on.
It's real.
Ya think? All my work.
All-all my study.
Thi-this book, proves that my life has meaning.
Okay, well great.
Can you, uh, crack open the undo spell? It's probably somewhere near the back.
May I open it? That's why we're here, bucko.
Kind of looks like a face, doesn't it? Ever wonder why? Because it's, uh, it's bound in human flesh.
- That's right.
- Yeah.
Hey, how you feelin'? Pretty bad.
Oh, but hey, I think I found the silver lining, though.
It's you.
You're like the little brother I never had.
Brother? - Really? - Mmm.
Nah.
No, that's how much I trust you.
Yeah, uh, well-well, sure, trust is great, but you know, maybe I'm a bad boy, who can't be trusted, right? Who-who is that? Yeah, that woman just took a gun out of her car.
Is there any world, where this doesn't have something to do with Ash? Beautiful.
Okay, let's get movin' with the whole process here.
- What do you say? - Ah, sure.
Get on your knees! Hands behind your head.
I know who you are.
Uh, lady, I think you're confused.
Detective Fisher.
State Police.
She say she was a cop? Oh shit.
I just knocked out a cop.
It was self-defense.
Okay, so Lionel, you're gonna be cool about this, right? You wouldn't want to jeopardize your life's work just 'cause there's a unconscious cop in your store, right? I mean you get that? - I do.
- You do? Kelly come on, he's cool.
Let's not poke at it.
Pablo, you, me, and Professor Know It All, we're gonna rid the earth of evil.
Kelly, can you stay here, watch our friend in case she wakes up? Oh, sure, I'll just sit here with the police officer we tied up, and rethink my recent life choices.
Thanks for understanding.
Okay, so how's it comin' with the old, uh, undo button? That tends to happen when you open the book.
Wait Do you even know what you possess here? Pff, well, of course.
I mean, obviously I do, but, uh, you might wanna share it with Pablo.
This book, is a gateway to hell, a- a way to summon forces of evil into our earthly realm.
Yup, that's exactly what I thought.
Please, continue.
You see, in ancient times, there was a group known as the Dark Ones, neither demon nor fully human.
They created this book as a weapon against humanity.
These pages, were cut from the bodies of the damned, upon which the Dark Ones inked their passages in human blood.
Passages that contain the power to create portals, connecting our world, to the underworld, where evil resides.
The Dark Ones use this book to hold power over all mankind.
So the book is the source of evil? Uh, no, no.
No, not-not the source.
More of a-a passageway.
The-the book itself is harmless, unless wielded by someone either very evil, or very stupid.
Okay, okay, let's say some cool guy, uh, reads from this book by mistake, and summons something from way back, and now he just wants to put it back, no harm, no foul? There-there is, uh, something, uh, about a reversal.
Sorry, it's uh Something difficult to decipher, but uh "The annulment "lies in the origin of man.
" No, uh, "Inside.
"Inside the origin of the man.
" The annulment.
So, the undo button is inside me? - Maybe.
- Maybe? Well, uh-uh, I'm dealing with a-a defunct, ancient language here.
Sounds like a lot of yappenin', and not a lot of happenin'.
I wish we could just summon an answer.
Wait a minute, Pablo, you smooth brown Einstein, that's it! We summon something from the book that can tell us how to undo all this.
Uh, yeah, no, that's not what I, uh, said Lionel, find me the weakest demon in that book.
What-what the fuck?! Get me out of these fuckin' handcuffs right now! Sorry.
Not happenin'.
I'm a fucking cop! Okay, um, put the gun down.
You don't understand what kinda trouble you're in.
I don't care.
You will, you don't wanna be on the wrong side of this thing.
Whatever's goin' down here, I am already on the wrong side of it.
So, no turnin' back now.
That guy that you're with, I have reason to believe that he's behind a lot of bad things.
You're wrong.
Oh, really? I'm wrong? Well then ask yourself What do you really know about him? So why are you doing this? Creating a space for the summoning.
Uh, a connection between our world and theirs.
Please, hand me the incense.
Ah! Watch the circle.
Okay.
Guys, this is bad.
No, no, it's-it's perfectly safe.
Just don't break the circle, and the demon remains contained.
Um, but reading from the book is what caused all this trouble to begin with, so Yeah, that's true, but reading from it again can't make things any worse.
It's kinda like spilling paint on a, painting.
It's okay 'cause there's already paint on it.
That is incorrect.
Look, you heard what the guy said.
The demon stays in the circle, there's no danger.
Okay.
Hey, will you tell him that we shouldn't be doing this? I've been waiting, my entire life to commune with the darkness.
See? He loves it.
Look Pablo, we're just gonna summon a teeny tiny demon.
Like a mouse demon.
Let's get Kelly in here, so we can take a team vote on it.
Listen to me, every time I've faced evil, it had the jump on me.
Now, we know exactly where it is, and I'm ready.
We call the shots in here.
Ah, come on Pablo.
You wanna be a Ghost Beater or not? - Okay.
- Okay.
- I'm in.
- You're in.
Yeah.
Lionel, you find a wimpy demon yet? Uh, nothing that says wimpy specifically, but I have found a-a minor demon named Eligos.
Possesses knowledge of hidden things, a- a demon of the mindscape.
Well, perfect.
Sounds like a total nerd.
Uh, says he preys on the-the spiritually and emotionally weak.
Well, he can do that in his own time.
Okay, get him out, let's chat.
Abigor, Khandar Listen to me, everywhere your friend goes, people get killed.
I told you to stop talkin' to me.
Now shut the fuck up.
Would you be committing a felony in a-in a creepy ass bookstore if it weren't for him? I'd be dead if it weren't for him! Okay, do you even know what we're dealing with here? People turnin' into fucking monsters! I know.
I had the same partner for 10 years.
A few days ago, I put a bullet in his head.
Same thing happened to uh to someone close to me too, okay? But the guy that you're trying to pin it on, could've left me alone to die with her, and he didn't.
Listen, if you guys are fighting these things, then we're on the same side.
Whoa! What the hell's goin' on out there? I have no idea.
I thought they were supposed to be fixing it! Doesn't look like fixing.
Whoa! Is this normal?! I have no idea! Oh, shit! Oh, shit! Get away! - Oh, oh! - Oh! Oh, oh! Look! I can help your friends, but not if I'm linked up like this.
Let me go! I can't! I promise you I won't hurt them.
They're in trouble.
Please.
Exit Eligos! - Ah! - Oh, God! Oh, shit! Oh my God.
Don't break the circle! Whatever you do! Do not break the circle! Why have you summoned me, Ashley? Okay, uh, first off, you don't look anything like your photo, so you might wanna update that.
Ah, secondly, I gotta take whatever I summoned, and put it back into the bottle, so, how do I do that? Release me and I'll tell you.
Yeah.
Nice try asshole.
Give me some info I can use.
Die quickly! This is my only advice.
Okay, that was a really bad idea, summoning this guy, Pablo.
All right.
Talk now.
Last chance! Hey Lionel, send this know-nothing waste of time back where it came from.
Oh.
- Um - Nobody move! And what the fuck is that thing?! Come on, lady, you ruined my day twice already with this bullshit.
Put the weapon down, or I will shoot you! Well as you can see, we're just a little busy here.
Now! No.
Oh, shit! Lionel, send it back! No! Hey Egghead! The fuck? Kelly, come here! Stay down! Whoa! What's going on? What is that thing? Ash summoned a demon.
He did what? Hiyaa! - Lionel, hurry up! - Yeah I'm-I'm trying! Ash! No! - Fuck! - We have to do something! We have to get to that book! That won't help! No one else can read it! Wait, what-what are you doing? - Helping.
- What? Nice shooting, Tex Mex.
Anytime Jefe.
Humanity's time is at an end.
Go back to hell! Oh.
Well that sucked pretty hard.
You guys okay? Yeah, I'm good.
Yeah, I think so.
All right, uh, grab the book and get to the Delta.
Maybe now you'll let me explain myself instead of pointing your gun at me? Okay, here's my story.
Ah, come on.
What? Well, that demon thing did not fight fair.
It's like he was in my head.
Um, what you do with the cop? Wait, did you kill her? No, Jesus, I cuffed her to a table.
Lost my pal Woody in the process, but hey, you wanna let her out again, knock yourself out.
She fuckin' lied to me, all right? She said she would help.
Well then, you two learned a very important lesson today.
Cops don't help.
We should go, before more show up.
Honestly, I don't think you should be giving me shit right now.
Why would you summon that thing anyway? So that we can learn how to unsummon everything else.
Come on Kelly, keep up.
Although we're kinda boned there too.
The only useful thing I learned in there was that, the answer might be "inside me?" Whatever the hell that means? Look inside yourself for the answer? Oh, sure.
Now that I gave you all the clues it's obvious.
Easier said than done, sister.
I think I know someone who can help us.
My uncle, he's a Brujo.
A shaman.
Wait, you-you're related to a witch doctor? Kinda, yeah.
Um, but, I-I haven't talked to him in a really long time.
I do not think Brujo would be happy to see me.
I'll just take him a couple of Miller tall boys.
Boom, problem solved.
Pablo, come on, this is bigger than your uncle issues.
- Okay, all right.
- All right, point the way.
We gotta vámonos.
"We?" I thought you were an "alone wolf.
" Not anymore.
I wouldn't be alive right now if it wasn't for my pack.
I think we should run together for awhile.
Pablo, music.
I'll stick it deep inside I'll stick it, deep inside 'Cause I'm loose Hey! Shit.
Hey! I'll stick it, deep inside I'll stick it, deep inside Hey! Well I'm loose Well I'm loose Well I'm loose