Betty (2020) s01e03 Episode Script

1
Improved by KID
Enjoy the movie(s) / show(s)
You still mad about
the winter ball thing?
Guess so!
JANAY:
Are the comments disabled?
-Yes
-Why?
Yo, Honeybear! This is Ash!
Yo, good news, she is gay!
It's okay, she's just shy.
- Why would you lie?
- Yes, I lied, okay? Fuck.
Some girl wants to destroy me,
and she's just using this
"Me Too" shit because
she knows it'll work.
Maybe I can do something.
What's her name?
Maybe you and I should shoot
some clips one of these days.
Yeah.
HONEYBEAR: I have something
to confess. I liked the girl.
Wow! I fuckin' knew it, bro.
- Why are y'all not eating
any pancakes?
Come on.
- I've got a French fry.
- Dip a pancake in the ketchup.
You gotta eat the pancakes.
- You eat them.
- You eat the pancakes.
- I'm gonna get constipated.
Diners always got
the longest menus.
Have you noticed that?
- Dinosaurs?
Diners.
Dinosaurs got some
long-ass menus, bro.
- Dinosaurs do have menus.
- They do?
Both: Where?
- On the dinosaur train.
- My God.
- What the fuck
are you talking about?
She's stoned.
- What are you
- Fuck, bro!
It's Janay's birthday today,
and I forgot again.
- So what are you gonna do?
- I don't know.
I don't really have money
for anything fancy,
so I thought I'd just gift her
with my presence.
- No, no, no, no, no.
You should do something special.
- Um
maybe I can give her
one of your weed pens?
Could I have one?
- Yeah, sure.
Yo.
Guys, where'd I leave my pens?
- Did you take 'em
from the park when we left?
- Shit!
Okay, I have to go back
and look for them.
- I'm gonna I'm gonna go
with her.
- No, it's okay.
- I got the tab.
- For real?
- Yeah, I got it.
- Thank you.
- Thanks.
- Bye.
Bye.
- Hey, you!
You can't smoke here!
What's wrong with you?
- I'm I'm sorry.
I'm from Ohio.
I don't know the rules out here.
- Put it out!
- Okay, I'll go outside
and I'll put it out.
- It's hypnotism ♪
When you look at me
with those eyes ♪
Got me ♪
I'm drunk on love ♪
High on ♪
And I'm through ♪
I'm addicted ♪
Waiting for your touch ♪
Conflicted ♪
Don't know
if it's too much ♪
My body can't handle
this dosage ♪
I'm overdosing ♪
I'm scared of the fall ♪
I can't seem
to love enough ♪
Surely fall ♪
With you,
I'd just be surviving ♪
I'm high on you ♪
Now I'm sober ♪
And I'm through ♪
- Like, got it shot up
or took hash or some shit.
- Yeah, for real.
- Smoking, you pass out
before you die.
That's why alcohol
All the other shit's
way more dangerous.
But this shit?
Look.
How much you think that is?
- Well
- How smacked are we right now?
Smacked.
So you don't need that many.
- Those are my pens.
- What?
- Look.
These could very well be
your pens.
We found them on the ground.
- Exactly, they're fucking mine!
- Okay, hold up.
I wasn't done.
- Well, I know
they're not your pens.
Both: How do you know that?
- That makes no sense at all.
- Because you just
fucking said that!
- We're smoking right now.
- If you knew
that they were your pens,
you wouldn't be having this
conversation with me right now.
- Yo, why the fuck
are you trying
to, like, ruin my life
right now?
- You're right.
- You're upsetting me,
and it sucks.
- Listen, y'all.
It's not me
you have to worry about, okay?
- Yeah.
- I'm not worried about you.
- I don't wanna have
to call my plug
and tell him to come here
and fuck y'all up, you heard?
- Yeah, he's no joke.
- Your plug?
- Yeah?
- Really?
- Just give me what you have
left and we're cool.
- Or what?
- Cool?
- What are you gonna do?
- Call my shit.
- Give me the fucking pens.
- All right, all right,
all right.
I'm not trying to get
into any trouble.
I don't wanna get beat up
or anything.
- She's not gonna beat you up.
- So here you go.
- Come on.
- I'm so sorry.
- You owe me $50
for each of these fucking pens.
Give me that.
- You should owe us 50 for each
we just gave back.
One more, one more.
- Fuck y'all!
- Fuck you!
What?
- Damn!
- Here.
Might as well.
Fucked anyways.
- Is your plug really scary?
- It's fucking Farouk.
- What if, like, old people
get slower as they get older,
so instead of slow motion,
it's old motion?
So they'd be like
"Shit,"
'cause it's in slow motion,
and it'd just be mad
Sh shit!
- What?
Fucking heart attack.
- What do I do?
- Go say hi.
- So I'll just be like,
"Hey, hello, what's good?"
- That's exactly
what you're supposed to do.
All right, just just
First of all,
be your charming Honeybear self.
Like, smile, but not too much.
You'll seem desperate.
And she's a regular person.
You're talking to a regular
human being.
Confidence.
You have it.
You got this.
- I don't know.
- She's coming.
- Okay.
- You got it.
- So you're coming with me,
right?
- No, I have to handle
this Farouk thing.
I'll I promise, I'll holl
I'll hit you up later.
- What?
- Check your phone.
I'll hit you up later.
She loves you.
She already loves you.
She does.
- Happy birthday to you ♪
- Shut up!
- Happy birthday to you ♪
Happy birthday!
- Bro, who's Tyler?
- Some nerd
with one less balloon.
Happy birthday, bitch.
What are you trying to do today?
- I'm gonna get my nails done.
You wanna come?
- Yeah, let's go, Tyler.
- Kay, total is $7.70
- Dope ♪
- I be ballin' ♪
Like a motherfuckin' pro ♪
- Like a motherfuckin' pro!
- I be ballin' ♪
Like my nigga Mo ♪
- Bamba!
Bamba!
- Sheck Wes ♪
Got so many flows ♪
I do it all ♪
- Yo, please keep my ring,
middle, and index fingers short.
Please.
Please.
- You're hilarious.
- What, I gotta keep
my working fingers short, bruh.
That eye roll
was kind of homophobic.
- Girl, I gay too.
Shit, my bad.
- That's valid, though.
- Hi, how are
Hey.
- Hey.
Listen, I
I didn't mean anything
fucked up going
Like, when I went
into Winter Bowl the other day.
Like, I had plans
with the other guys,
Philip and them, and
But I can see
why you guys were upset,
and I feel bad,
so I'm sorry.
- There's no "you guys."
It's just me.
We're good.
We don't have beef.
Okay.
It's gonna be $38.33.
- Um
I actually don't want that.
I just want the water.
- Okay.
Wait just the water bottle?
- Yeah.
- All right, you can have it.
Just it's on me.
- Thanks.
- Could you bring it
a little closer?
- Damn,
you got Internet addiction
like a motherfucker, yo.
- I'm just checking something.
Thanks.
Thank you.
Hey, let's get bubble tea
after this.
- Yeah.
Hey, girl, can I buy you
a bubble tea?
- No.
- Yo, Janay, they got
that lychee jelly shit, bro,
and that pudding stuff.
My God.
I love bubble tea.
What flavor are you gonna get?
Yo, hello?
What flavor are you gonna get?
- Yo, actually,
I'm good on boba.
Let's just go to Knickerbocker.
- What are you talking about?
We just got here.
Yo, you've been acting
mad sketchy today, bro.
All you've been doing
is looking at your phone
like it has answers on it
or something.
- Look, this girl Yvette Torrio
has been talking shit,
and I'm trying to find her.
- What?
Some bitch has been
talking shit about you?
- Yes.
- On your birthday?
Hell no, bro.
I'm not with that shit.
Let's go get that bitch.
Fuck out of here.
But wait, hold on, let me just
get a bubble tea really fast.
I like mango.
- Yo, let's get it again.
- The fuck do you mean
"again," bro?
I wanna skate a rail.
I'm so tired of this.
I feel like I'm wasting my time.
- Bro, not everything
has to be a banger.
How many times
do I have to tell you this?
Hey-yo, Camille-toe!
Let's get a clip.
Yes!
Whoa.
My G you're good at this.
You're good at, like
the camera.
Cameraman or something.
Whoo-hoo!
- Yo, I see your Full Cab!
That shit was fire!
- Can you do that?
- That shit was fire.
Ay!
Okay.
See, bro?
She's just getting clips, bro.
That'll do it.
- Whoo!
- Yeah!
- Yeah!
- Yeah.
- Whoo-hoo!
- Sick.
Yo!
- Yes.
- Yo, Charlie!
- Yo, that shit was sick, dude.
- Thanks.
- Wow, look at you!
In the video already.
- Sorry, dude.
Cute girls get more views.
Don't you know that?
- Hold up one sec.
Yo, Camille.
Come here for a sec.
Yo, you know
I'm not shooting you
because I think you're cute.
Yeah, no, I know that.
I was just joking.
I was just completely
kidding around.
- You know why I film you?
Because I think you're good.
If those idiots feel threatened
by that, then let them.
Let's get some more stuff.
- Hi, Honeybear.
- Hey.
- Honeybear's here.
- Yeah, I texted her.
If shit's going down,
we need backup.
- I thought it was her birthday.
- It is.
- Well, happy birthday.
I hope it's lit.
Yeah, thanks.
- Janay, how old are you again?
- You're supposed to know that.
I don't
- Is that Indigo?
- Hey, guys.
Have you seen Farouk?
- Why, are you guys smashing?
- Ew!
No, he's, like,
my fucking uncle.
But I owe him a lot of money,
so if you see him, like,
you haven't seen me, okay?
- Okay, okay.
We're about to mob, yo.
We need to get out of here.
We need to go.
- That didn't explain anything.
I thought it was her birthday.
- It is.
- Aren't we going to celebrate?
- Top down ♪
Rolling ♪
Rolling with the top down ♪
With my niggas
and your bitch ♪
Rolling with the top down ♪
See me rolling
with the top down ♪
With my niggas
and your bitch ♪
You ain't got no idea ♪
Guess I gotta teach ya ♪
Top down
through the streets, yeah ♪
You think she ain't
on a leash, yeah ♪
Baby, you know what it is ♪
Know you a sleeper ♪
But you know
they love a creeper ♪
Don't be shy
with your features ♪
Top down ♪
Rolling with the top down ♪
With my niggas
and your bitch ♪
Rolling with the top down ♪
See me rolling
with the top down ♪
With my niggas
and your bitch ♪
Rolling with the top down ♪
Rolling ♪
Rolling with the top down ♪
Tell your man
he better pipe down ♪
See me rolling
with the top down ♪
- Yeah.
- Girl, you a fool ♪
Lick it up like a dog ♪
Ridin' in my coupe ♪
- Top down, vroom.
- I'ma take you back
to the shore ♪
Livin' how I do ♪
Never let the scene
choose you ♪
Never met a mans this cool ♪
Couple screws loose ♪
Fuck it
'cause it match my cool ♪
Fuck it
'cause it match my cool ♪
Trippin' like a fool ♪
Never let the scene
choose you ♪
Never met a mans this cool ♪
Couple screws loose ♪
Fuck it
'cause it match my cool ♪
Fuck it
'cause it match my cool ♪
Top down ♪
- Yeah.
- What?
What?
- Nothing, I'm just looking
at your pants.
I like 'em.
I like, like, the
I like the whole style.
It's good.
Well, thank you.
I you know, I'm really into,
like, that tuxedo look, and
- Yeah.
- You know.
Okay, do you wanna know
who my style icon is?
- Who?
- But you can't laugh.
You can't laugh.
Say you're not gonna
- I won't I won't
- All right,
it's Charlie Chaplin.
- Okay.
- You know his, like,
signature thing, right?
- Like, what makes
Charlie Chaplin
Charlie Chaplin?
You tell me.
You mean his walk?
He does, like, that
- Yeah.
- Yeah, I know yeah,
it's cool, right?
- Go ahead, do it.
- No, I'm not gonna do the walk.
- He's your style icon.
You have to do the walk.
- Yeah, but that doesn't mean
I know how to do the walk.
- Dude, it's not that hard.
You've seen, like,
a million of his movies, right?
So do the f
- No.
- It's with the heels and the
- But it's weird.
- Here, it's like this.
No my
I don't know you.
- And he'd, like,
walk into a room
- No, stop!
- And he'd, like,
say hi to everybody.
- No, no!
- No one's watching.
- When did that happen
in the park anyways?
- Yo, you did a good job today,
though.
You skated all day
and you kept up.
- Yo, Indigo!
Get over here.
- Yo, what you doing, bro?
What you gonna do?
- I gotta talk to you.
- You gonna go murder her
and have her end up
in the East River?
- What the hell, man?
You think I'm gonna murder her?
- Yeah.
- Chill out, buddy.
Come on, take a hike.
I wanna talk to her.
- Okay, whatever, whatever.
- What's up?
- Of course he didn't do it!
- How do you know that?
- I talked to him.
I've literally known him
for, like, forever,
and I'm telling you
there's no way.
Like, I dated him,
for Christ's sakes.
Wouldn't you think
that I'd know?
- Look, look, I'ma smash two,
I'ma trout mouth,
I'ma take another one,
and I'ma give one to my girl.
- You didn't come here
with no girl.
- I didn't come with a girl,
but she leaving with me.
- Aw!
- Shit!
- Somebody leaving with me, man.
Someone.
- You're not gonna touch.
You're just looking, son.
- Anyways, this girl
seems exactly like the type
to lie on a motherfucker's dick
just for attention.
She's that type.
- What type is that?
- Like, straight thot.
Like, has her titties
all on Instagram
and shit like that shit no!
- I want another margarita,
so you buying it.
- No, then you buying it.
- You buying it!
- You buying it.
- Do they take EBT?
- Apparently they do.
- All right, so let's go.
- Yeah, let's go.
Let's go.
- Yours are more
of a political statement,
you know?
Yours are, like, artistic,
you know?
You have, like,
stickers and colors, and
hers are just too big to be out.
Look, it doesn't matter anyways.
I'm just trying to talk to her.
That's it.
- Ooh.
I feel Pisces energy.
- No, that's, like,
the opposite.
- My ex was a Pisces.
- Okay.
- The worst.
- It was bad?
- Bad.
- Keep guessing.
- No, just been trying to, like,
cut down on the weed
a little bit.
Like I don't know,
I've just been, like,
incorporating other herbs.
I got, um
- Listen, listen, I told you,
when I'm with the ladies,
you gotta let me just be me.
- Bro, but what about me?
- I'm not a team player, man.
I'm sorry to tell you that.
- Damn, you should
win your shot solo.
That's foul.
A'ight.
Nah, I see you, I see you.
- It's a herb,
but it makes you dream,
like, very vividly.
Like, you feel present
in your own dreams.
Like, you can kinda
You know, like, lucid dreaming?
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
It's like you can just
lucid dream.
Like, anything you want.
- Dude, just chill out.
Relax.
- I'ma tell Luis about this,
bro.
I'ma tell Luis about this.
- I don't even know Luis.
We out, baby, come on.
- Yes, you do. What you
- Maybe we can just crush up
some oregano
and, like, put it in the oil
and then just inject it
back into the cartridges,
like, make it stretch
over a few pens
- No, that's not gonna work.
Oregano's got, like,
a seriously distinct flavor.
You think people
are trying to smoke pizza?
Look, I know you're my homey,
and I know you think
I run this ship,
but I don't.
I get my shit from Karl.
We gotta worry about Karl.
- Who the fuck is Karl?
- You don't know who Karl is?
Fucking Karl?
Karl.
Karl, hello?
- Stop saying "Karl"!
Maybe we can just, like,
talk to him or something.
- There's no talking to Karl.
You know that story
about the guy
who owed the drug dealer money
but instead of killing him,
he Super-Soaked him
with a thousand hits of acid?
That's Karl, man.
- Karl did that much acid?
- No, Karl was the one
with the Super Soaker.
The other guy went insane.
The first couple days
were awesome,
but after that?
Karl does twisted shit
like that, man.
He's like the fucking
booger man.
- Bogeyman?
- Bogey?
That doesn't sound right.
- Shut the fuck up.
- Where the fuck are you going?
- The fuck you think I'm going?
To get your money.
- Yo, the door!
- I saw this car the other day,
and it looked like you.
What?
- Yeah, have you ever seen a car
and it looked like a person?
Or, like I don't know.
Yeah, like, so the lights
are the eyes
and the mouth is the hood
or the thing bel the engi
The thing on the bottom.
Like, it's, like
It looked like you.
- What kind of car was it?
- It was a Nissan Cube.
What?
What?
- You guys got the same eyes,
I'm telling you.
- Come on.
- And the jawline.
- My God.
- That's so weird.
Yo, I'm actually
just gonna go up
and shower really quick.
- Okay.
- Meet me at the Dome
in, like, an hour?
- No, I don't have an ID.
- Whatever, it's the Dome.
It doesn't matter.
I'll see you there.
- All right, see you.
- Bye, Camille.
- I'm not giving you $3,000.
You already get an allowance.
- Mom, I need it.
- I earned it.
- I'm serious.
I'm desperate.
- Okay, so you were desperate
when you needed Prada boots,
you were desperate when you
needed Burning Man tickets,
and now you're desperate again.
I'm kind of
- It's not for
any of those things.
- Well, what's it for
this time, honey?
- It's a drug debt.
Okay, that is a new one.
No, honey, no.
No.
We have talked and talked
and talked and talked
about this.
Your allowance is 350 a week,
no more,
so if you have a drug debt,
then you need to get a job.
- But, Mom!
- I am not gonna be late
for dinner with Faizon, so
there's curry in the fridge.
Fucking curry.
Fun.
Curry.
I love curry.
- And that is
what we are gonna go with.
- Faizon's not even cute.
Why don't you go talk to her?
Go ask Camille.
- Camille, pretend
you're my friend and
Hey, Honeybear.
- Pretend you're my friend
and introduce yourself.
- Yeah, I'm not good
at this kind of
- Introduce yourself.
- Hi, I'm Camille.
- I'm Ash.
- Nice to meet you.
This is my friend Honeybear.
- Hey.
- She's
like, she's really cool
and, um
I I gotta go to the bathroom.
- Um, yeah, I'm Ash.
I think I saw you earlier.
- No.
- I'm pretty sure
Well, you looked like
you were gonna say hey,
but then you didn't,
then you kind of
just skated by me.
- No, that wasn't me.
- I'm pretty
I'm pretty sure it was.
Okay.
What about the other day
when that girl yelled my name
and my sexual orientation
at you?
- Yeah, that was me.
That was you, right?
- Yeah.
- I recognized you.
- Bathroom's this way.
Um, are you gonna chill here
for a while?
- Yeah.
- Do you wanna, like,
get a drink or something?
- Yeah, let's
Let's go do that.
- Okay.
- Yo.
Me and you need to talk.
- Who the fuck are you?
- Donald's friend?
- Who the fuck is Donald?
Don't act like you don't
know what I'm talking about,
like you didn't say
he was creeping on you
at the party last week.
- Bitch, I was in
fucking Barbados last week.
- What are you talking about?
- Do you think I'm Yvette?
That's my fucking twin, bitch.
- Twin what?
- Yvette!
- This bitch who freaked on you?
- Fuck no.
- She's trying to pop
the fuck off right now.
- Yo, what the fuck
are you doing here?
You following me?
- No.
You need to watch your mouth.
- Your boy needs to watch
his fucking hands, okay?
- What you need to watch
are your hands,
and you need to stop
talking shit.
No, I'm not.
- What the fuck is your problem?
- Weren't you in Barbados?
Go back to Barbados, bitch!
- Yes, and you know what?
You can go to Barbados.
- Dude, we listen,
you're goofy as fuck.
You need to go back
- Bitch, get the fuck out
of my face.
Both: Get your hands
- Out of her face!
- What, are you guys in sync
and shit?
No one's talking to you.
This has nothing to do with you.
- Don't talk to my
fucking sister like that.
- All right,
I'm talking to you, then.
- Shit.
- I gotta go.
- Hold on.
Can I see your board?
One sec.
- My girl's, like
I need to back her up.
I need to back up my girl Janay.
- Just one second.
No board slides
till you call me.
- All right.
Bye.
- Bye.
- Are you doing this
for attention?
You look crazy.
- You look fucking crazy.
- Listen, you're the one
who's fucking crazy.
- Go the fuck home.
- Look, I'm just trying
to figure out a way
to squash this shit, okay?
- This isn't squashing shit.
- Y'all ain't gonna
shoot the hands?
- No one's fucking
- Boring!
- Yo, back the fuck up.
What you doing?
- Chill out!
- What?
- Grab her tit.
- What?
- Yo, shit.
- What the fuck you just say?
- Calm the fuck down,
little girl.
- Get the fuck up off me!
All:!
- Hey.
Hey, hey, hey, hey.
Get out of here!
- We gotta go!
Let's go!
- I can't.
You know what happens
when we run from the cops.
- Hey, hey!
- They didn't do anything!
- Freeze.
- Don't worry.
They didn't do anything.
- Up against the wall.
- Hey!
- Hands behind your back.
- Damn.
- This is the worst birthday
ever.
It's your birthday?
No way.
Happy birthday.
- Birthday ♪
Birthday ♪
- Somebody in here,
it's your birthday ♪
- It's your birthday ♪
- Somebody in here,
it's your birthday ♪
- It's your birthday ♪
- Somebody in here,
it's your birthday ♪
- It's your birthday ♪
- Everybody move
like it's your birthday ♪
- Come on!
- Birthday? ♪
Mama,
dance on your birthday ♪
Mama, go on, break it down
on your birthday ♪
Birthday? ♪
- Birthday ♪
- Birthday? ♪
- Birthday ♪
- Birthday? ♪
- Birthday ♪
- Birthday? ♪
- Birthday ♪
- Celebrate, girl,
nobody can compare with ya ♪
Birthday in January
so she a Aquarius ♪
They say the pussy got miles
like Darius ♪
But she look better
than most chicks in her area ♪
Shawty don't want a lame,
she only like Gs ♪
Only fucking with the thugs
in the white Ts ♪
Birthday February,
sign Pisces ♪
Into nouveau
with Long Island iced teas ♪
Then right after January
and February ♪
Was a girl who was a Aries
who always be smoking berry ♪
Hairstyle short,
but her stuff's so hairy ♪
Ass so fat,
earrings canary ♪
Now break it down
with your friends ♪
You a Taurus ♪
I heard you just flipped
to a Benz from a Taurus ♪
Improved by KID
Enjoy the movie(s) / show(s)
What do you wanna say
to the camera?
I'm on this date right now, and,
I'm trying not to screw it up.
CAMILLE: Janay, why'd you have
to start shit with that girl?
I didn't start shit.
Can you shut up please?
I'm trying to sleep.
- Hey Farouk.
- FAROUK: My money's past due.
- It's only been like a day.
- What do you think this is,
a 30-year fixed mortgage?
JANAY: Look, I just need to talk
to your sister.
We've seen how you talk.
- What else was I supposed to do?
- Not get us arrested,
and then bounce.
Camille, I'm so sorry.
You got 48 hours.
I can't protect you anymore.