College Romance (2018) s01e03 Episode Script

1
What were you saying?
Listen!
Yeah?
60 or 90?
Turn the volume down
when you drop me off.
60 or 90?
Whatever you want, mate.
90, then?
Go ahead.
You know, three of my neighbors
have complained already.
You're going to get me into trouble
someday, my Bugs Bunny.
Hang on!
You call him 'Bugs Bunny'?
Since when did you become so landy?
Do you guys want to hear the story or not?
Of course, man. We'll stop.
Please continue.
So then
where are we going after the movie?
Uhlet's go to South Ex after the movie.
My friend has a cafe.
I don't need to pay for parking.
Yeah?
And then?
Uh, then
Then we can go to India Gate for ice-cream.
I'll get Tutti-Fruity, you get Cassata.
Good one!
And, after that?
After that
Hold on, there are tons of barking dogs here.
She wants to know what we're doing after that.
Oh fuck, dude! It's finally your turn!
Cheers, mate!
Listen!
Yeah?
Make sure you impress her.
Do the whole roses thing.
It's your first time, right?
Yeah, it is my first time.
And listen, get rid of this beehive.
Break the bear, bro!
Girls have soft cheeks, you know.
Hello? Yeah, just hold on.
But what do I say to her, mate?
Tell her you'll go to the room.
Your mate is booking you a hotel room.
Bu
Say it, you pussy!
Mate, don't get me killed.
So, after that
we'll go to the room.
Room? Why would we go to a room?
What will we do there?
UhMate, she wants to know
what we'll do in a room.
You'll do it.
We'll do it.
It?
We already did it at the pool party.
Not that.
IT!
Are you sure?
Just tell her, man.
Sure?
Say it, pussy!
Yeah
Not that.
IT!
She's in shock! She isn't saying anything!
Hello?
Why so shocked?
Hello?
Hello?
Wha
She isn't saying anything, mate.
What are you saying?
Yep.
What
Yeah.
Hush!
Oh!
What's she--
Quiet!
She isn't saying anything, man!
That's what I said!
That's what I'm saying too!
Hello?
And then?
What did you say?
I didn't know what to say, so I
You said yes?
So, Bugs, what time are you
coming to college?
Do something. Sit here.
We'll get notes from Mosquito.
Come on, Trippy,
Come.
I freaked out! Karan
Is she crazy?
Please guys
Come on, man, I don't want to waste my time.
You guys are going to leave me alone?
Please help me, guys! Karan! Trippy!
Honestly? You guys are awful!
Just the worst! Help
She's crazy, man.
Say it, Trippy.
I wanted to ask
Yes, Trippy, girls don't wear bras to bed.
That I already found out.
I wanted to ask,
how the hell did you fall for Bagga?
I mean
You two
are quite different, aren't you?
Isn't it, Karan?
Yeah, but
I was thinking the same thing.
We are very different as people, but
You know, he refers to
penne pasta as 'pipes'.
What an idiot!
Hey!
Funny! I meant he's funny.
He is funny.
And he's so cute!
There's just something about him.
Oh yeah?
Awwww!
My ass!
In chasing that something,
don't lose sight of everything.
Did that guy message you this morning?
Yeah, the same old 'Good morning'.
Was anything different?
Now that you say it
There was something.
The 'u' was missing.
Good morning has no 'u'.
G-U-D. Gud.
And 'morning' he must spell M-R-N-G
How many Gs?
Normally there are three,
but today he just put one.
The Gs at the end are fewer.
Which means Bagga didn't wake up excited.
Okay.
That means, his
Nope.
Because he
Nope.
Because he
Yeah!
Nooo!
Oh!
And the 'U' in 'gud' is missing.
Which metaphorically means
You are missing.
So if you think about it,
Bagga didn't wake up excited because
because of you.
What nonsense!
Should I check mine?
If you wish.
Mine are fine.
Congratulations!
Are you being honest?
Naira.
You got him sexually frustrated.
And if you don't tell him
you'll have to eat broccoli.
Broccoli?
I have to eat what?
Yeah!
You'll have to eat broccoli.
Meaning?
Sir, we're not quite as intelligent as you.
Please elaborate.
Yeah!
When your mother calls to ask
what to make for dinner,
you say, "Whatever you want."
You get home only to find out
that she has made broccoli.
And you hate broccoli.
I love broccoli!
I love broccoli!
Everybody hates broccoli.
That's a fact.
But in your case
You didn't want to eat broccoli.
But the broccoli's cooked.
So,
how is this relevant to my relationship, Karan?
Imagine
If you say to your mother,
"I want to eat paneer for dinner."
What will you get for dinner?
Paneer.
What should you say to Bagga?
What should I say?
Kids!
What does Bagga want?
Paneer?
What do you want?
Paneer!
Paneer!
So if both of you want paneer,
why is broccoli being cooked?
Why is broccoli being cooked?
Why is broccoli being cooked?!
Paneer is my birthright.
And I shall have it.
Same here!
So what are you waiting for?
Go have paneer.
Let's go, Naira!
Let's have paneer!
Paneer!
Let's do this.
want to eat paneer.
Bugs, let's have paneer.
please
Bugs, let's have paneer.
Let's eat paneer!
you know.
Good luck.
They look so good.
So good, right?
What can I say,
it was better than mozzarella.
Hi Raveena!
Hi Trippy!
Bugs
So, what's up?
Iwanted totalk to you.
ActuallyI was saying
Now
is the time for us to mate our souls.
Let's eat paneer.
Eww Naira! What the fuck?
I didn't expect this from you!
Ewww!
Is this how your parents have raised you?
You turned out to be so horny!
I thought you're my Ranbeer Kapoor!
You turned out to be Shakti Kapoor!
Come on boys, chant with me.
Girls, let's chant!
Horny!
Shakti Kapoor!
Horny!
Shakti Kapoor!
Horny!
Shakti Kapoor!
Horny!
Shakti Kapoor!
Horny!
Naira! Horny! Naira!
Horny! Naira! Horny!
Naira! Horny! Naira! Horny!
Naira! Horny! Naira! Horny! Naira!
Can you please hurry up?
It's been a while.
Karan!
It's very important.
What's so important?
Listen! Come out!
Naira, I've been standing here for half an hour.
Just come here.
Why you doing this, bro? Just come!
Dude, just
Hey hey! Get behind.
I've been here a while
Hold the notes.
I just want to talk. Hang on!
Take half.
Karan.
Tell me.
Is sex the most important thing in life?
I don't think so. So
I'm not chasing it anymore.
You're right, man.
My father says the same thing.
Yeah!
Wait for marriage.
There's always porn.
Let me guess.
You guys got fucked, didn't you?
You guys are such idiots.
Hey! You're acting damn cool.
Have you ever eaten paneer?
Kadai paneer, shahi paneer,
paneer bhurji, paneer butter masala.
I've even eaten paneer raw.
I'm the prince of paneer.
When? Where? How?
In a car. In a room. In a hotel.
Even on your terrace.
Really?
My terrace?
With whom, bro?
Trippy, I don't like to talk to virgins.
Shut up.
Karan
Please help me, man.
I want to eat paneer, but
I don't want to ask.
Let me think.
You think. I'll get these done.
Get the whole lot.
Sure.
Bro, you think.
I'll finish the assignment.
The mid-sem break starts tomorrow.
Ma'am won't accept submissions.
What did you say?
Ma'am won't accept submissions.
What did you say before that, man?
Before that, I
The mid-sem break.
Let's go on a trip.
What?
You crazy?
What's crazy?
Get out of my way!
120% of first time sex
always happens on a trip.
One room. The whole night.
At some point of time it will just
happen.
And if they don't agree?
What if they have hang-ups?
Decisions like this aren't made by the brain
but by the heart!
By the dick.
And in your case, vagina.
So use that to think.
Decided?
Done!
Good luck.
Go!
Deepika!
Come on! Here!
Pass! Pass! Pass!
Take it! Quick!
Cover him!
Asshole
That's how you do it, ladies!
fucker
Did you see that, fucker?
Bugs!
You guys play. I'll be back.
Okay. Cool.
Let's go.
Hi.
Hello.
You look nice.
I gotgot my beard trimmed.
Sorry, man. Yesterday
I didn't book a room or anything.
I'll drop you home by 9:30,
with the volume lowered.
No, it's okay. That's not
That's not what I wanted to say.
What?
I wanted to say
The mid-sem break is starting.
So
Should we go on a short trip?
Trip?
Just for fun
You know, paneer
I mean, there will be hills.
The weather will be nice.
That's true.
We'll go sightseeing.
We can have a bonfire.
We'll have fun in the room.
Trippy and Raveena are coming too.
It's a group trip.
And then Karishma went and complained.
Yeah?
Yeah!
She's horrible.
Isn't she?
Yeah!
Listen! We wereplanning to go on a trip.
Really?
Yeah.
Can I please get a pad?
Why a pad?
What do you mean, why?
I mean
You had it just last month.
You get it every month, Trippy.
What are you saying?
Tell me about the trip.
Nothing, I meanwe were just
planning to go on a trip
Yeah?
Yeah.
Who's going?
Our regular group.
How many?
Bagga, Naira, Deepika, Karan
Let's go on the trip!
Okay
Let's go.
Let's go!
I'll ask my mother.
But if
If she says no, don't fight.
Why?
It's not a nice thing to do.
Fighting with your mother
Interesting plan.
I know, it's my plan.
But, but I
Why would I go with you?
You are my girlfriend.
Ha! No!
What?
Who said that?
We are girlfriend-boyfriend.
We broke up!
When?
Remember?
Karan, that day you tried to break up
with me in the car. What's wrong with your memory?
Butafter that we were back together.
We even went to the party
You said you wanted to give us some more time.
Yeah!
I gave us time.
So?
But a few days ago, I was reading
a damn good article
on how to remove blackheads,
and I realized
It's notit's not working out between us, Karan.
That doesn't mean you break up with me!
Dude
A break up hurts.
Aren't you hurting?
Even blackheads hurt, Karan.
So badly!
Butit'sgood to get rid of them, right?
Anyway.
I'm out of your league, Karan.
Let's face it.
I did it.
I see.
You broke up with me.
Nice, nice.
Why didn't you tell me?
Oh!
Didn't I?
Sorry.
I forgot.
Yeah, forget.
Forget these things.
That Karan is a dog.
No! Karan's going to be with you forever!
Shut up, Karan.
No! Girls want Karan, but Karan wants you.
But you don't care!
I said I'm sorry, Karan.
Karan is always running after you, Deepika.
Karan is always running after you.
"Let's go somewhere, anywhere."
I'll make it up to you, Karan.
How will you make it up to me?
You can't make it up to me!
It's me who's always crying! You
I'll go on your stupid trip, Karan!
But as friends.
Okay.
We'll go.
Do you want to make out right now?
Are you crazy?
Yes.
Undo my fucking buttons!
Okay, Mum!
Yes! Okay.
Yes, I promise.
Okay, thank you, love you, bye!
Mum said yes!
We can go on the trip.
Awesome, babe!
Thesethese tickets aren't getting booked.
Let's cancel it.
We'll go next week.
If it's not happening, let's leave it.
Is this guy mad?
When I talk to you,
is there music playing in your head?
Your bro's car is here.
There's a 'Government of India' sticker on the back.
We'll go in the car.
No paying tolls or taxes.
That's great, Bagga, but,
how will six people fit in this?
That's right.
We'll go next week.
No, we can all fit.
Karan, we can fit.
Raveena can sit on my lap.
No, no, I can't.
I'm chumming.
What happened?
Dude
Actually, I
I'm not feeling very well.
Let's cancel it.
Yeah.
You were fine an hour ago.
I'm feeling weird, all of a sudden
You too?
Do you have a fever?
Hey!
You're burning up, bro.
Hello?
How can you just cancel?
Dude, he has a fever.
No, no, no!
He'll fall sick.
Don't ruin my first time.
You've eaten paneer.
I also want to eat some!
Eat paneer?
You want to eat paneer?
What does that mean?
Paneer
Karan will tell you!
Karan, them.
Hey!
Iwhat
Go on, tell them.
What can I tell them?
Naira, what should I say?
Say what you're saying.
Everyone knows what paneer is.
Tell us!
Speak.
Meaning?
It means doing it.
It?
Not that. IT.
It's simple, man.
Everybody knows.
I read the chats.
Raveena, it wasn't my idea.
It was Karan's idea. He's indecent!
You know that I can't have it before marriage.
Dad would hit me.
What a lie!
You're such a liar!
He made the plan.
And he said he would eat raw paneer.
Creep!
How can you call me a creep?
Raveena.
You know, these guys have
eaten paneer on my terrace. They
Excuse me?
I haven't ever eaten paneer on your terrace.
Fucking liar!
She forgot, man!
Don't we forget things during exams?
Don't be shy.
Tell them.
We did it.
First of all, I'm not shy.
Secondly, what did I eat with you?
Paneer?
Damn tasty, right?
You don't be shy.
You tell them.
He hasn't ever eaten paneer either.
Fucking virgin!
Okay, okay, okay, okay.
Cool, cool, cool, cool.
She doesn't remember, man.
You fucking cheat!
Bloody show-off!
You turned out to be a scam artist, asshole.
Spreading rumors!
What are you talking about, Mr. Bugs Bunny?
Who planned to eat paneer in a hotel room?
Horny bastard!
Don't you say anything to Bugs!
II wanted to eat paneer too!
What?
Really?
I did feel like her voice was twinkling
when I was talking to her.
I had a feeling
Even we had a feeling.
That you'd eat paneer.
and we have to fast.
Dude, Trippy, don't say that.
Why?
Why can't we have paneer?
If there is a problem
I've seen Shubh Mangal Savadhaan.
Idiot! I'm okay, man.
You are chumming.
It's my last day, Trippy.
Yeah?
Really?
Sowhy didn't you tell me?
This isn't something you just tell.
You mean, now we can
Yeah.
Bagga, how many rooms should I book?
One is done.
You guys figure yours out.
Bro, two are confirmed.
Two are confirmed.
Rest I don't know.
What's with this awkward silence?
Book a room.
When are we leaving then?
Sexuhsix.
Six, I mean.
Six.
Are we going on the trip too?
Of course! Who wants to miss a trip?
Anyanyway. Not like I was going by myself.
I see.
Oh.
I always have Mohini by my side, man.
Of course!
I'll ride her. Keys?
You can't ride a bike.
You'll see. Keys?
Uh
Shut up! Keys!
Let me just show you the gears. First
Keys.
Stop with this drama.
I'm damn hungry.
Should we go for Chaap?
Yeah, I'm damn hungry too.
Let's go.
Mint or cream?
Cream.
Mint it is.
I want to eat the cream ones, man.
She always does this.
She's crazy.
I want to eat the cream one.
Hang on, guys. Where are we going?
The car's back there, idiots.
Let's go, then.