Dracula (2020) s01e03 Episode Script
The Dark Compass
1 [MINA SCREAMING.]
No! No! [DRACULA.]
Hello.
I've been dying to meet you.
[AGATHA.]
Count Dracula, have you eaten? I've worked up an appetite.
- Good thing there are two of you.
- No.
Under no circumstances are there two of us.
Take Mina, lose me.
I know you don't like to drink the blood of the dead.
You'd die to save this terrified child? - I'd die to save any terrified child.
- Why? Because I'm not like you.
There's a nobler purpose to my life than simply prolonging it.
Settle for her or take me and learn something.
Run.
Go, now! Agatha Van Helsing, I'm going to make you last.
[SIGHS DEEPLY.]
You'll be part of me.
You'll travel to the New World in my veins.
Come, boy, suckle.
[SNARLING.]
[THEME MUSIC PLAYING.]
[SEAGULLS SQUAWKING.]
[ALARM BLARING IN DISTANCE.]
[ALARM CONTINUES.]
[DOG BARKING IN DISTANCE.]
[FOOTSTEPS APPROACHING.]
[SIGHS.]
When did you get in? I didn't hear you.
Ugh.
Close the curtains, would you, love? Who are you? [GRUNTS.]
Sorry, I didn't mean to disturb you.
What are you doing here? Who are you? - Um - Are you a friend of Bob's? Oh, God, did you have to bring him home? Sorry.
He invited me in.
[SIGHS.]
What's the state of him? [DRACULA.]
He's downstairs.
Drunk? Well, that's certainly one way of putting it.
[SIGHS.]
What the bloody hell is going on? Shh.
Bob? Where's Bob? What? What've you done to me fridge? [DRACULA.]
Is the fridge the white box? Yeah.
Bob's in the fridge.
It took a bit of folding.
[DRACULA SIGHS.]
Look at her.
[SIGHS.]
So So beautiful.
[INHALES DEEPLY.]
Oh.
[DRACULA CHUCKLES.]
He's alive.
Oh, please, you mustn't worry.
He definitely isn't.
Just a bit restless.
[CREAKING.]
[HELICOPTER WHIRRING.]
[ZOE.]
Welcome to England, Count Dracula.
What kept you? Are you hungry? Agatha? How long? Do you need to feed now? How long was I in the water? One hundred and twenty-three years.
[LAUGHING.]
Is that all? [ZOE.]
I'm sorry? [DRACULA CONTINUES LAUGHING.]
Ah! You've been busy.
I like the flying thing.
What about this one over here? Does that fly too? No, that doesn't fly.
Okay, I think we've got this.
- You can head back.
- [PILOT.]
Roger that.
Departing.
You're not her, are you? But it's the same bloodline.
Unmistakable.
Ah.
- May I see that? - Stand your ground, soldier! It's not a weapon.
No, of course not.
It's a camera.
May I see it? Give it to him.
Yeah.
Boo! [ZOE.]
How did you recognize it? It can't look like any camera you've ever seen.
I've been around since the 15th century.
Things change.
You get used to it.
[DRACULA LAUGHS.]
You do seem to be accelerating, though.
Very good.
Smile.
Ah.
Please.
I'm sure you have a very pretty smile.
May I see it? Want to do it together? Hmm? Yeah? Ah.
Smile.
- There.
Smile.
- [SOLDIER.]
Drop your weapon! - Drop yours! - Drop it! [DRACULA.]
Drop yours! Now, please have mercy and smile.
I've been sleeping underwater for more than a century.
There are many advantages to being a vampire, but it does make it hard to be a morning person.
There.
That's better.
You see, I'm not so bad after all.
- Put it down! - Smile.
- Drop that weapon! - Don't shoot him.
Do not shoot him! - [SOLDIER.]
I said drop it! - Smile.
- [SOLDIER.]
Drop it now! - No.
I can hear your pulse.
[CHUCKLES.]
It's very lively now.
Van Helsing.
[SIGHS.]
Descendant, I assume.
Sister Agatha Van Helsing was my great-great aunt on my father's side.
I really liked her.
By my understanding, you killed her.
Killing is healthy competition.
Mercy is disrespect.
- [GASPS.]
- [BATS SCREECHING.]
No! [SOLDIER.]
Sir, what are your orders? I like the noise it makes.
That's a nice touch.
[CREAKING.]
[DRACULA.]
Listen, he's really not worth your sympathy.
He enjoyed hitting you, you know.
I've acquired some of your husband's memories.
I think you would say that I've downloaded them.
How? Orally.
[SHUDDERS.]
May I? [FRIDGE RATTLES.]
[KNIFE SLICES HANDS.]
[THUMPS.]
- [DRACULA.]
Kathleen, isn't it? - Yeah.
What's wrong with your servants, Kathleen? Is it their day off? I'm assuming you have staff.
You're clearly very wealthy.
- [KATHLEEN.]
Wealthy? - [CHUCKLES.]
Yes.
Well, look at all this stuff.
All this food.
The moving picture box.
And that thing outside.
Bob calls it, um a car.
Is that yours? Yeah.
And this treasure trove is your house.
It's a dump.
[DRACULA.]
It's amazing.
Kathleen, I've been a nobleman for 400 years.
I've lived in castles and palaces among the richest people of any age.
Never never have I stood in greater luxury than surrounds me now.
This is a chamber of marvels.
There isn't a king, or queen, or emperor that I have ever known or eaten who would step into this room and ever agree to leave it again.
I knew the future would bring wonders.
I did not know it would make them ordinary.
[KATHLEEN SHUDDERS.]
Four hundred years? Ah, sorry.
Five hundred, actually.
I slept in.
Who are you? I'm a vampire.
No.
No, don't be silly, Kathleen.
You know it's true.
People always know.
Trust the hairs on the back of your neck.
I'm the reason you have them.
Now [CLEARS THROAT.]
there usually are questions.
Um Do you have a reflection? - I'm sorry? - In the mirror.
They don't have reflections in the films, vampires.
Do I look like someone who can't see himself in the mirror? Hmm? Uh [DRACULA.]
Most of the vampire legends are wrong or misunderstood.
But mirrors I don't see any less in the mirror than you do.
I see more.
[GASPS AND PANTS.]
["SYMPHONY NO.
5" BY BEETHOVEN PLAYS.]
Ah! No.
[CHUCKLES.]
Do you have an orchestra? [SHAKILY.]
Hello? Ah.
[BURPS.]
Telephone.
Thank you, Bob.
[THUMPING FROM ABOVE.]
Who else is up there? [BREATHES SHAKILY.]
Ah! [SIGHS.]
[PHONE RINGING.]
[RINGING CONTINUES.]
Get in the box.
[DRACULA.]
How did you find me? It's not difficult to follow a trail of devastation.
The sun is up.
You need to get in the box.
Um You may not have noticed, but there's a roof over my head.
[ZOE.]
I've noticed.
[DRACULA YELLS.]
Get in the box.
Did you hear me? Are you in the box? Meet me downstairs.
Hello? Count Dracula? Hello? Okay, I'm coming in.
Keep in mind, I've got people outside.
Anything happens to me, they're gonna tear the roof off and let you burn.
Hello? [WHISPERING.]
Where are you? [FRIDGE OPENS.]
[BOB.]
Kill me! Kill me! Kill me! Kill me! Scared yet? [HISSES.]
[BREATHING HEAVILY.]
[ZOE.]
You're killing me.
[DRACULA.]
It doesn't have to hurt.
[DRACULA RETCHES.]
[DRACULA VOMITING.]
[SNARLS.]
[ZOE.]
Get the box.
Get him in the box.
[BREATHING HEAVILY.]
Look at me.
Look at me! [SNARLING.]
[SOLDIER.]
Where do we put him? [WOMAN.]
Straight to isolation.
Johnny? [MOBILE PHONE VIBRATING.]
[PHONE BEEPS.]
[PHONE VIBRATING.]
[PHONE VIBRATING.]
[SIGHS DEEPLY.]
[PHONE BEEPS.]
Hey.
[WOMAN.]
Tonight.
You could bring someone.
Who? [WOMAN.]
I don't know.
Just bring someone.
[SCOFFS.]
[WOMAN.]
You're not getting all sentimental on me, are you? 'Course not.
[SIGHS.]
[WOMAN.]
Sentimental is just stalking.
See you later.
Bye.
[CHUCKLES SOFTLY.]
[CAMERA SHUTTER CLICKING.]
[CLICKING CONTINUES.]
[WOMAN.]
Lucy! What time did you get in last night? It's not healthy.
Yeah.
I'll sleep when I'm dead.
[PHONE DINGS.]
[BUBBLES POPPING.]
Takin' over the streets Gonna live forever Got the world at our feet Gonna live forever Just drunk on power At the top, every hour Every minute, every day, our way In your face, check it [RAP MUSIC CONTINUES INDISTINCTLY.]
Hey! Quincey! [RAP MUSIC CONTINUES.]
Everyone, this is Quincey.
He's an American from Texas.
- Texas.
- Evenin'.
[GIRL.]
Never known a cowboy before.
Are you a cowboy, Quincey? - Uh No.
Not really, ma'am.
No.
- Uh-huh.
- "Ma'am"? - [QUINCEY.]
I mean, I ride quite a bit, - but I've never really - He rides? Come on, cowboy.
Let's dance.
[RAP MUSIC CONTINUES.]
[TECHNO MUSIC PLAYING.]
I need to pee.
So, I never asked you what you do.
Luce didn't seem sure.
Like a nurse or somethin'? I'm a junior doctor.
But I want to specialize in mental health.
You? Lucy says you've got money.
Uh [CHUCKLES.]
I guess.
You've gotta wonder if she'd be into me if I wasn't rich.
But then, would I like her if she was ugly? [LAUGHS.]
They do have actual loos here, you know.
There's a queue.
You're terrible.
Shut up.
It's quicker out here.
No, I'm talking about Jack.
What about Jack? Now, don't tell me you haven't seen the look on his face.
It's not like I've never shagged him.
What is he complaining about? I think he might be in love with you.
Don't be daft.
It was like three times.
Four, depending what you count.
You'll get a reputation.
[LAUGHS.]
What? - Thank you, Queen Victoria.
- Well, you know what I mean.
I do.
It's called slut-shaming.
Yeah, it takes one to know one.
Why shouldn't I have fun? Jesus, I'm only 22.
It's not like I'm gonna marry anyone.
[BOTH LAUGHING.]
[ELECTRONIC DANCE MUSIC PLAYING.]
If it's any consolation, I think you're very cute.
I mean, I know you're not gay.
I mean, obviously, what with Lucy and all.
Three times, four.
I mean, no, I just wanted to Look, sorry.
Sorry.
I wish I'd never [MOBILE PHONE VIBRATING.]
[CROWD SQUEALS.]
Oh, my God.
Yes, yes, yes! [CONFETTI POPS.]
[MOBILE PHONE CONTINUES TO VIBRATE.]
[GIRLS CHANTING.]
Married! Married! Married! Married! Well, I hope they'll be very happy.
Neither do I.
[LAUGHS.]
Want to get a drink? Yeah, but, uh I can't.
See you.
[GIRLS GIGGLING.]
Go! [CAR ACCELERATING.]
[DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYING.]
- I didn't have time to bring anything.
- You don't need anything.
We've been trying to contact you for hours.
Sorry.
I was in a club.
It was noisy.
So you've actually found him.
- You weren't drinking? - I don't drink.
Good.
Neither does he.
In here.
What do I do with my clothes? Just leave them on the chair.
Is this information up to date? Um Yeah, I think so.
How many of us are there? [WOMAN.]
You're about to meet everyone.
Here.
Can you put this on, please? - Hello, Jack.
- Zoe Dr.
Helsing.
- How are you feeling? - Well, it's a big day for science.
I suppose I wasn't really expecting it on my watch.
I meant, how are you? Oh.
Asymptomatic so far.
Trying not to think about it.
I thought you were withdrawing from the program.
- I thought there was a girl.
- Yeah.
I did too.
Well, come on.
The briefing's started.
[WOMAN.]
So, this is the main part of the ship.
Basically undisturbed for over 100 years.
The original teams were looking in the wrong place.
No one realized quite how close Count Dracula's ship got to the British mainland.
Oh, hello.
- Jack Seward.
- [WOMAN.]
Hello, Jack.
Sorry to be so late.
Oh, don't worry.
I haven't got to the good bit yet.
Another O-negative, I see? [WOMAN IN AUDIENCE.]
Vanilla.
[CHUCKLES.]
Welcome, Jack.
There's nothing wrong with vanilla.
We searched the wreck for three days, but what we were looking for was approximately 200 yards south of it.
[WOMAN.]
Now, a box this old, you'd expect at least a few barnacles.
But look at it.
Untouched by any living thing.
[JACK, SOFTLY.]
Well, there you are.
Your life's work.
You don't look so happy.
Yeah.
I'm as happy as the pope would be if Jesus actually turned up.
As you can see, even after 123 years, the body was perfectly preserved.
Or so we thought.
[CLASS GASPS.]
[CLASS.]
Oh! [WOMAN.]
The body was not preserved.
Dracula was, in fact, alive, though dormant.
Apparently, in some kind of restorative coma, in which he would've remained if I hadn't been stupid enough to feed him.
So, in case you're wondering, yeah, vampire's bite.
[CHUCKLES SOFTLY.]
You need to know what you're signing up for.
We will keep you safe.
But this isn't just about giving blood.
It's not just another student drug trial.
There is a reason it is better paid.
Now, you will have controlled exposure to a vampire.
- Are we clear? - [ZOE, SOFTLY.]
Bye.
[WOMAN.]
Obviously, at this point, having triggered his revivification, we opted for tactical retreat.
We resealed the box so nothing could interfere with the process, and we monitored from the shore.
It took Dracula another ten hours to fully revive.
And of course, we were waiting for him on the beach.
Why? Did you hear me? Why is that there? What is it for? It's a toilet.
I'm a vampire.
Why have you given me a toilet? [DOOR OPENS AND CLOSES.]
[ZOE.]
Good morning, Count Dracula.
How are you settling in? Well, uh, I have a chemical toilet and this.
You have every book written during your coma and somewhere to sit.
Well, I need more than books, Zoe.
[MECHANICAL WHIRRING.]
[WHIRRING CONTINUES.]
[WHIRRING STOPS.]
Take off your coat and roll up your left sleeve.
[DRACULA.]
Why? Because I told you to and I can break you with a sunbeam.
[UNLOCKING.]
I'm coming in.
Make any attempt to attack me, and my colleague will fully open the roof and burn you to a crisp.
Do you understand? So, you're a doctor this time, are you? I think I preferred the disappointed nun.
I'm a scientist.
Well, that amounts to the same thing.
I'm not Sister Agatha.
I'm Dr.
Helsing, and I'm the woman in charge of this foundation.
In charge of it? [CHUCKLES.]
Oh, of course.
I suppose women's rights are just something you slept through.
Women's what? Did you say rights? - You'll get the hang of it.
- No, no, no.
Please try and explain.
I missed an entire century.
What are rights? Nobody has rights, Zoe.
Man, woman, or monster.
No one, nowhere.
It's just a lunatic fantasy.
Or civilization, as we like to call it.
- Give me your left arm.
- Why? Because you're going to give blood.
Well, this is a first.
So tell me, what is the Jonathan Harker Foundation? I can't seem to penetrate the skin.
No? Give it to me.
Take this.
Hold this.
[SIGHS.]
Johnny was a fine man.
What has this place got to do with him? - Oh, you remember Harker, then? - Mm-hmm.
This foundation was set up by Mina Murray, his fiancée.
Do you remember her? [SCREAMING.]
Barely.
Insipid little thing.
Flavorless, one imagines.
Well, you left her alive.
Go, now! When her father died, she inherited his fortune.
And with the cooperation of Sister Agatha's extended family, they set up this foundation in Jonathan's name.
So, you run the family firm? I've always approved of inherited power.
Democracy is the tyranny of the uninformed.
Only in blood do we find the truth, Zoe.
[ZOE.]
Our primary purpose is medical research, but with the stipulation that were you ever to be found, you would be trapped, studied, understood, and humanely fed.
- You're a unique specimen.
- No.
I'm a 500-year-old warlord.
And I know mercenaries when I see them.
Who's funding this place? Because people who can afford mercenaries are very rarely interested in medicine.
You're withholding information.
I'm giving you everything.
Blood is lives.
Everything is in the blood, Zoe, if you know how to read it.
Do you know how to read it? You couldn't read mine.
You choked on it.
I remember the flavor, though.
Um What is that? You're fast.
You're clever.
Driven.
But driven by what? Agatha was always trying to save everybody, but you You hold yourself apart.
Friendless, loveless, childless, compromised, corrupt even.
Ah.
Zoe Helsing, there's a shadow on your heart.
I've sampled its bitter bouquet before, and these days, I believe you call it [SNARLING.]
cancer.
That's why your blood was poison to me.
You're dying.
Doctor, I need to talk to you.
- What is it? Who's this? - Oh, hi, Frank.
Sorry, yes.
Hello.
Bit late.
Trains.
What're you thinking? Get rid of him.
Throw him out the bloody building.
Dr.
Helsing, I think you'd better listen.
Who are you? [DRACULA.]
I'm sorry.
That's rude of me.
Um, this is Frank Renfield.
We've been, um, Skyping.
Hello.
Dr.
Helsing, isn't it? I'm sure we can sort all this out.
Skyping? Ah, yes.
Um Thanks for this.
You're online? You're not supposed to be online.
Well, don't you know how these things work? Terribly clever.
Who gave him the Wi-Fi password? Well, it's my name.
Oh, Jesus.
[WOMAN.]
Tell Dr.
Helsing who you are.
Right, well, yes.
I'm Count Dracula's lawyer.
- His what? - His lawyer.
His lawyer? Sorry.
Well, not sorry.
But, you know, I'm afraid it does look like you're keeping him here against his will, and whilst my client doesn't want to make a fuss, well, that's not really on, is it? - Since when do you have a lawyer? - Um 1896.
Exactly, yes.
We've been representing Count Dracula since September the 12th, 1896.
Well, Hawkins and Wentworth have.
Wasn't there myself.
Not that old.
[LAUGHS.]
No offense.
1896? [FRANK.]
We purchased some properties for the count and arranged his resettlement.
Does it bother you that the man who engaged your firm in 1896 is standing over there without a single gray hair? Ah.
Thank you.
[FRANK.]
Oh, it does.
Yes, quite a lot.
Really, in fact, I think it's properly frightening.
Don't you? But the thing is, you see, being well over a century old is not actually against the law.
What's against the law is you locking him up.
I think you might've forgotten, Dr.
Helsing, Count Dracula has rights.
Yeah.
He's a bloody vampire! I feel that's an emotionally loaded term.
It is the correct term.
It's not a legal term.
Has he harmed anyone? - Yes.
- No.
- Well, on the beach - No.
There were rumors of an incident on the beach a few nights ago, but there was no trace of anything the following morning.
And everyone has stopped talking about it.
So, either there's been some sort of cover-up, in which case, the police will certainly be interested, or there was no incident to cover up in the first place, and my client is guilty of nothing.
Which would you prefer? After all, why would a medical research facility have access to uh I don't know, let's say, mercenaries.
I'm not curious for myself, you understand, but [INHALES DEEPLY.]
people are such gossips.
Count Dracula has given a deadline for his release.
Eleven minutes past eight this evening.
Slightly odd timing.
But he has his ways.
It's not odd.
It's not odd at all, Mr.
Renfield.
Eleven minutes past eight is sunset.
[CHUCKLES SOFTLY.]
[KEYPAD CLICKING.]
[DRACULA.]
I'm sending you an e-mail.
"Dear Zoe, Thank you for being such a courteous host.
It is, however, the tradition that the courteous host must speed the parting guest, and I'm sure you will accord with this.
Also, thank you for your offer of food.
However, it is not my practice to eat cattle.
In the matter of blood, I'm a connoisseur.
Blood is lives.
Blood is testimony.
The testimony of everyone I've ever destroyed flows in my veins.
I will choose with care who joins them now.
Ripeness is the first moment of decay.
Sweetness is the promise of corruption.
I shall look for the perfect fruit of this world.
[CHUCKLING.]
And I will find it.
Never doubt that.
I will find it.
Blood is everything you need to know, Zoe, if you understand how to read it.
Have you worked out how yet? If you ever hope to match me, you'll have to.
" [FRANK.]
The Jonathan Harker Foundation, terribly interesting, did some tremendous work during the last two flu outbreaks, but their funding stream is, to say the least, opaque.
One might almost say occult.
- [SIRENS BLARING.]
- [MOBILE PHONE VIBRATING.]
[PHONE BEEPS.]
[LUCY.]
Where did you go? Are you sulking? Just 'cause I got engaged? Jack, don't sulk.
Um, Jack's not here at the moment.
- Who shall I say called? - [LUCY.]
Oh, sorry.
Tell him it's Lucy.
Lucy Westenra.
Who's this? Hello, Lucy Westenra.
I'm Count Dracula.
[SLOW DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYING.]
[MUSIC ENDS.]
[DRACULA.]
Agatha Van Helsing.
You'll be part of me.
You'll travel to the New World in my veins.
Come, boy, suckle.
[SNARLING.]
[GASPS.]
[WIND WHISTLING.]
[LAUGHING.]
[CAMERA SHUTTER CLICKS.]
- I can't do two more days of this.
- What? - I feel bloody terrible already.
- Lightweight.
- Stick your head out the window.
- It's the Jägerbombs.
That last one tasted like furniture polish.
- Where are the crisps? - I can't get the taste out of my mouth.
Somebody said they were getting crisps.
We only have plain ones.
Plain? Oh, Jesus.
What's good about no flavor? [FRANK.]
What was wrong with the physicist? [SIGHS.]
No flavor.
And the tennis player? Stringy.
Master, I am trying to provide you with precisely the skill sets you're hoping to acquire.
Listen, for 500 years, I have not had to exercise, but these days, everything is done for you, and everything is being delivered, even food.
- [GIRL.]
We nearly there? - [BOY.]
Another 20 minutes.
What? - I'm just texting.
- I know that face.
- What face? - Yours.
"Will you be hungry later?" Master, you came to me with a program, a plan, some genuinely fresh initiatives for Well, let's call it what it is, world domination.
May I ask, as your lawyer, what are you doing with your time? You can't afford to feed on just anyone.
Oh, dot, dot, dot.
There's a reply coming.
- Give it back.
- Are you not eating with us? - She's drinking with us.
- Give it here.
Ah Reply's in.
"Is that an offer?" Lucy Westenra, you're getting married.
Yeah, final days as a free woman.
- Give it here.
- Uh-uh.
How shall I reply? Yes.
Just say yes.
[BOY.]
"Miss Westenra is available for a late dinner.
" I'm saying "late.
" We've got karaoke.
So who's this one, then? D? [GIRL.]
Who's D? How about this one? Staying locally, double first from Oxford, martial arts expert, non-drinker.
- Ah! - [TEXT MESSAGE BEEPS.]
Sorry.
Already have dinner plans.
I am trying, Dark Lord.
I do sometimes wonder what it is that you actually want.
[SIGHS DEEPLY.]
[TEXT MESSAGE DINGS.]
[FRIENDS LAUGHING.]
[ELECTRONIC DANCE MUSIC PLAYING.]
Uh, what about the Harker Foundation? Are they still taking an interest? Hmm, there is some activity.
However, your lady friend has left their employ.
My lady friend? Dr.
Helsing.
I'm unclear exactly what's happened, but I'm assuming she'll take no further interest in you.
Hmm.
[YAWNS.]
What's the time? Half two.
[CHUCKLES.]
You know what? I think there's blood in my alcohol stream.
Yeah.
- Did you hear what I said? - I did.
- There's blood - In your alcohol stream.
It was hilarious.
It's the wrong way around, you see? Stop, you're killing me.
Are you even drunk? Were you even drinking properly? Maybe I'm saving myself.
For dinner? - Mm.
- For D? Don't.
Who's hungry at this time of night? [GRUNTS.]
You sure about all this? All what? Marrying Quincey.
I like him.
You're supposed to love him.
Okay, I love him, then.
'Cause he loves you, and Jack loves you.
Everybody loves you.
Yeah.
I'm pretty.
That happens.
Woo! Listen to her.
Do you know what it's like when you're pretty? Yes.
[CHUCKLES SOFTLY.]
Everybody smiles.
You never see the world without a big, stupid smile on its face.
[BOY.]
Mm.
The thing you don't get [SIGHS DEEPLY.]
marriage is for life.
Yeah, but life isn't forever.
[TEXT MESSAGE DINGS.]
[CHUCKLES SOFTLY.]
[PHONE DINGING.]
Ah! Tart.
Hungry.
Could've waited.
Need to feed on someone, Lucy.
You don't always give your consent.
I bet this one didn't.
Fast food.
So why does my consent matter? It doesn't, but it's delicious.
I'm a gourmet, not a glutton.
Why always a graveyard? I like to spend time with people my own age.
[LAUGHS.]
Yeah, funny guy.
Very funny.
Where will you be buried? Why? Because I might want to visit.
That's next-level clingy.
- Thank God I'm being cremated.
- No.
Shut up.
Everyone here's just wasted space for this.
Listen to me.
Do not let them burn you.
Why not? It hurts.
[LAUGHS.]
Never heard anyone complain.
Well, I have.
I'd say there are nine here.
Yes.
Nine.
Nine what? Sufferers.
Come here.
Give me your hand.
[LUCY GIGGLES.]
What am I doing? Listening.
[FAINT KNOCKING.]
[KNOCKING.]
What's that? What does it sound like? [KNOCKING.]
[KNOCKING.]
- Knocking.
- [DRACULA.]
Knocking, yes.
On a coffin lid.
[KNOCKING CONTINUES.]
From the inside.
[MAN, MUFFLED.]
Turn on the lights, please.
Someone turn on the light.
It's so dark.
[WOMAN, MUFFLED.]
I can't find my face.
I can't feel it.
- [KNOCKING.]
- [WOMAN.]
Help me! Are they vampires? Nothing so evolved.
They're just undead.
The unfortunate few who remain sentient as they rot.
[INDISTINCT PLEADING.]
[DRACULA.]
Ah.
The children of the night.
What music they make.
[PLEADING CONTINUES.]
Ah! [MAN.]
Please! [CHILD'S VOICE.]
Bloofer lady.
Bloofer lady.
Bloofer lady.
Bloofer? Beautiful.
He means you.
[CHILD.]
Bloofer lady.
How does he know I'm here? Because he's looking at you.
Right there.
Bloofer lady.
Bloofer lady play peekaboo.
[CHILD.]
Peekaboo.
Some of the little ones wriggle their way to the surface.
I think they can smell the worms.
[GASPS SOFTLY.]
Can you see me? [SOFTLY.]
No, no, no.
No, no! Don't play with him.
He'll follow you home.
Would he really? You know, in a very, very long life, I don't think I've ever met anyone quite like you.
You really don't care, do you? The perfect fruit.
[GRUNTS.]
[SIGHS.]
Lucy? Shit.
[BEEPS.]
[BOY SIGHS.]
[DRACULA.]
Dying is the only remaining novelty.
Every other human experience is cataloged somewhere in your endless, chattering libraries.
Nothing comes fresh.
Every living instant is shop-soiled and secondhand, except that one moment in life that no one can report back on.
In a world of traveled roads, death is the last unprinted snow.
You don't have to talk a lot of shit.
You know, people don't usually say that to me.
Yeah, you kill them before they can.
Basically, you're blocking people.
[DRACULA BREATHES DEEPLY.]
- Do you love me? - No.
- Will you ever love me? - No.
Well, that's one less thing to worry about.
Aren't you even a little scared of me? Aren't you afraid of anything? Even dying? Everybody dies.
Lucy, you're a very special flavor.
Two minutes.
If you've still got the appetite.
- Three.
- Five.
Special treat.
What do you want to dream about tonight? Put me somewhere beautiful.
Where no one can see me.
Where I don't have to smile.
[SIGHS.]
[MOANING.]
Unscrupulous doctor deployed tanner's knife.
Twelve letters.
Ah.
Dracula [FLY BUZZING.]
is my lord.
[BOY.]
Lucy? Lucy? Lucy.
Luce.
What the hell? [BOY OVER PHONE.]
Jack, please, you've gotta see her.
She won't see doctors, but she might see you.
Stop.
[CHUCKLES SOFTLY.]
[PHONE LINE RINGING.]
[JACK.]
Could I speak to Dr.
Helsing, please? No.
No, I didn't know that.
[GASPS.]
Hello.
Did somebody send you? Look, sorry, no offense, but I am really not a believer.
[JACK.]
Zoe? Sorry, I didn't mean to Oh, Jack.
Hello.
Sorry, I was dreaming.
Please come in.
[JACK.]
Thanks.
Sorry if I startled you.
No, no, you didn't.
Ugh.
Try again, I'm incredibly bored.
- I didn't bring any grapes or anything.
- I hate grapes.
In that case, you're welcome.
Very kind of you to come and see your old mentor.
Is it, Jack? Is it kind? Oh, Jack.
You're my star pupil.
I only suggested you for the donor program so you could get some easy money.
Get you through college.
I never thought Dracula would actually come back.
[JACK.]
Nobody did.
So what do you think? About Lucy? It's possible.
Could be him.
Dracula chooses his victims for a reason.
Is there anything special about her? I love her.
But she's a perfectly ordinary girl.
She can't be.
Because if it is Dracula, what keeps him coming back for more? [SIGHS.]
[KEYPAD CLICKING.]
Hello? Who's down there? Is that you? [CHILD.]
Peekaboo.
[BREATHING HEAVILY.]
Peekaboo.
Bloofer lady.
[GASPING.]
- [CHILD.]
Peekaboo.
- [DRACULA.]
May I come in? [CHILD.]
Peekaboo.
[LUCY BREATHING SHAKILY.]
[LUCY GASPING.]
[DRACULA.]
Please avert your eyes.
I, um have to murder a child as we used to say in Vladivostok.
- [SQUELCHES.]
- [CHILD SCREAMS.]
[DRACULA SIGHS.]
I'm ill.
Well, not ill, precisely.
[LUCY.]
Look at my face.
[SOFTLY.]
So, so beautiful.
I'm as white as a sheet.
As the last unprinted snow.
Am I dying? [DRACULA.]
You're mortal.
You've been dying since the day you were born.
[DRACULA SIGHS.]
My people have a saying, "One should always speed the parting guest.
" [LUCY BREATHES HEAVILY.]
[KNOCKING ON DOOR.]
[WOMAN.]
How you feeling, love? [FLY BUZZES.]
[WOMAN.]
Just gonna make some tea.
Want some? [FLY BUZZING.]
[WOMAN.]
I'll bring you a cuppa.
You stay there.
You need to keep your strength up.
[FOOTSTEPS RECEDING.]
Help me! Help me! Help me! Help me! Shh.
Hush, Lucy, you're mine now.
You've nothing left to fear.
You won't be long in your grave.
Your mind screams aloud, but for now, your body must be silent.
[FEMALE PRIEST.]
In the midst of life, we are in death.
Of whom may we seek for succor, but of thee, O Lord, who, for our sins, art justly displeased.
Yet, O Lord God most holy, deliver us not into the bitter pains of eternal death.
["ANGELS" PLAYING.]
I sit and wait Does an angel Contemplate my faith And do they know The places where we go When we're gray and old [CRIES.]
No! No! Help me! [SCREAMING.]
That salvation lets their wings unfold So when I'm lying in my bed Thoughts running through my head And I feel that love is dead Come on.
I'm loving angels instead And through it all She offers me protection A lot of love and affection Whether I'm right or wrong And down the waterfall Wherever it may take me It's like I can hear her.
I can feel her crying for me.
I'm loving angels instead [SCREAMING.]
Help! [METALLIC CLANGING.]
Hello? [METALLIC CLANG.]
Hello, is someone there? Is someone here? Did someone open the furnace? It's not supposed to be open yet.
[LUCY.]
Did you put me - Oh, my - in the fire? [SCRIBBLING ON PAPER.]
I'll be with you in a moment.
Where am I? [AGATHA.]
That is not the question, Zoe.
I may call you Zoe, mayn't I? The question is, what are Dracula's limitations? So, we know three things: he cannot enter an abode without an invitation, he cannot stand in the sunlight, and he fears, above all things, the sight of the cross.
But you see, we are wrong.
These three things must be one thing, much tidier.
God is always tidy Well, according to his own account.
Oh, do stop hanging your mouth open like that.
Dracula drank my blood, and you drank his.
Blood is lives.
What's left of mine is in him and now also in you.
As he promised, I have traveled to the New World in his veins.
There are an awful lot of people in Dracula's blood, but I suppose my DNA syncs with yours.
Oh.
What a useful vocabulary I now have.
- Who are you? - It's perfectly obvious who I am.
- So, what does Dracula fear? - I don't know.
Or what does he want, then? I don't know.
Yes, you do.
He returned to feed on Lucy Westenra time and time again.
Well, he could feed off anyone in London, anyone in the world.
Why return to one perfectly ordinary girl night after night? Who are you? Who do I look like? Me.
Correct.
Now, think, think, think.
What does he want and what does he fear? I don't know.
I don't care.
It's not my problem anymore.
I am inside your head.
I feel your guilt.
Your foundation, it was funded by Oh, I can't see it.
You don't like to think about it, do you? Wherever that money came from, I did good with it.
[AGATHA.]
For many years, yes.
But you also brought Dracula back to life with it.
So he's still very much your problem, and you know that.
[SIGHS DEEPLY.]
What can I do? Poor child.
As our Lord said that night in Gethsemane, "The spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak.
" Tell me who you are.
I am the spirit and you are the flesh.
The darkness of Dracula shall guide us to the light.
I'm dying.
I'm dead.
But I am Sister Agatha Van Helsing of the Saint Mary's Convent, Budapest, and neither of us are quite done yet.
[MOBILE PHONE VIBRATING.]
[PHONE BEEPS.]
[ZOE.]
I need you to pick me up from the hospital.
I'm discharging myself.
Zoe, you're dying.
Well, don't take too long then.
[LUCY.]
Beautiful.
Beautiful lady.
Bloofer lady.
So, Master, in conclusion, I feel we should continue to consider the Harker Foundation an active personal threat.
[SNIFFS.]
Sixty-two, I think.
[SNIFFS.]
Accountant.
[FRANK.]
We shall, of course, continue to monitor their activities using agents local to the area, some discrete hacking, and, at your suggestion, uh, bats.
Can I just You don't look very surprised.
You don't look very dead.
I'm getting there.
Finding you wasn't difficult.
A man of your breeding and ego is temperamentally incapable of hiding.
One just looks for an unnecessarily tall building, multiple exits, and no view of a church.
Also, your number's listed.
How kind of you.
Bringing a bottle to the party.
Very inferior vintage but the gesture is appreciated.
- [ZOE.]
Put him down.
- Why? This is England.
Conversation precedes dinner.
Quite right, Dr.
Helsing.
[DRACULA SIGHS.]
You're expecting company? Yes.
- Lucy Westenra.
- [DRACULA.]
Oh, you know her? Well, this is Dr.
Seward.
It was his phone you stole.
[JACK.]
You might say I introduced you.
Ah, and now she's dead.
[CHUCKLES.]
[ZOE.]
If you're expecting Lucy to rise from the grave this evening, Count Dracula, you might be interested to know that she was cremated.
Cremated? But I told her.
I warned her.
And still, she let them put her in the fire? - Apparently.
- No, no.
You don't understand.
She would've been conscious the whole time.
Her flesh melting, every cell carbonized, every particle of her being incinerated.
Stings a bit, I believe.
[DOORBELL BUZZES.]
[DRACULA.]
There.
You see? You have underestimated the resilience of the vampire.
- [DOORBELL BUZZING INCESSANTLY.]
- Ah! I always liked a lively one.
Um, Dr.
Seward she was your friend, was she? Yes.
Now might be a good time to reflect that beauty is only skin-deep.
Pray for her, Jack.
Remember, it is the soul not the aspect that one loves.
Dr.
Helsing, you don't sound quite yourself.
Are you all right? Perfectly.
[LUCY.]
Hello, you.
[DRACULA.]
Did you have much trouble finding the place? [LUCY.]
I can always sniff you out, babe.
Jack.
Oh, Jack, what are you doing here? Oh! And who's this? Finally, you bring someone.
Bit pale though, if you don't mind me saying.
[INHALES.]
Did you start without me? [ZOE.]
I'm not on the menu.
I'm an old friend.
We go way back.
[LUCY.]
Why are you just standing there, Jack? [EXHALES SHARPLY.]
Kiss me.
Kiss me, Jack.
Kiss me.
Lucy, no.
Come on, Jack.
Kiss me like you used to.
Kiss me.
[SIGHS.]
Kiss the girl, Dr.
Seward.
Journeys end in lovers meeting.
[LUCY.]
What's wrong, Jack? You can't look at me now? The boy who looks at me all day, every day, can't you look now? What's the matter, Jack? Lucy, can't you see yourself? Of course I can see myself.
[SIGHS.]
Bloofer lady.
Bloofer lady.
[INHALES.]
Everyone Everyone smiles when you're beautiful.
Why aren't you smiling, Jack? If you're so beautiful, Lucy, why don't you take a selfie? You smell funny.
She's dying.
[ZOE.]
We wear the bitter bouquet, Lucy.
The blood of the dying is death to the vampire.
You smell of death.
It's not just me.
[SIGHING.]
[LUCY SCREAMS.]
My patient, Dr.
Seward.
[CRYING.]
[DRACULA.]
My patient.
[LUCY SOBBING.]
Lucy, my love.
It's a shock.
It's a shock.
But you've done so well.
- You've done so well.
- [GASPING.]
Look at me.
I see you, bloofer lady.
[LUCY.]
Will I always be like this? Yes.
Promise.
Always.
But I was beautiful.
Beauty's never more than a disguise, Lucy.
You've outgrown it.
I don't want to! I don't want to! [DRACULA.]
Lucy, listen.
- [LUCY CRYING.]
- [DRACULA.]
Shh.
Listen to me.
Listen.
Listen to me.
[LUCY CONTINUES CRYING.]
[YELLS.]
Listen! [LUCY SOBS.]
You're my finest bride yet.
In 500 years, you were the only one who willingly opened up her veins.
[LUCY CONTINUES CRYING.]
You knew what was happening.
- No.
- You embraced it.
You accepted it.
Now you can live forever.
Oh, yeah? Like this? Look at me! - I don't mind.
- Oh, don't you? No.
Oh, well, I do! I mind! [WAILING.]
[WHIMPERING.]
Lucy.
Kiss me.
[LUCY.]
No, no, no! [SCOFFS.]
[CRYING.]
You don't You don't want to kiss me like this.
[JACK.]
Lucy Westenra, there has never been a day I didn't want to kiss you.
And there never will be.
[SOBBING.]
Oh, Jack.
Oh, Jack.
[LUCY SNIFFLES AND SOBS.]
Do it.
Jack, do it.
For me.
Do it for me.
[GASPS.]
[STAKE CLATTERS ON GROUND.]
[SOBBING.]
[SNIFFLES.]
She was my most promising experiment.
Took me 500 years to make a bride this good.
Now look what you've done.
[JACK.]
She was never yours.
[SNIFFLES.]
Or mine.
[SIGHS.]
Or anyone's.
[DRACULA.]
Well, I suppose she died well.
That's a rare quality, you can take it from me.
Quality or flavor? Ah.
Flavor.
Very particular.
In my experience unique.
She almost seemed in love with death.
That's it.
That is everything.
And that's why her.
Jack, you must go.
I can't leave you.
I'm about to have a personal conversation with Count Dracula.
And I'm certain he won't want it witnessed.
Why not? Because there's only one thing in this world that you're truly afraid of, and finally, I know what it is.
Uh, I don't.
I know you don't.
Dr.
Seward, you may leave.
- Get out.
- Dr.
Helsing - [ZOE.]
No, Jack.
- I can't If you want to throw your life away in some act of selfless heroism, there will be other opportunities.
It's going to be a beautiful day.
Thank you.
Well, how did it taste? [DOOR CLOSES.]
How did what taste? [LAUGHS.]
Dr.
Helsing, I think you drank my blood.
[SCREAMS.]
[SCREAMING.]
[BREATHING HEAVILY.]
It's 93 million miles away.
It really isn't gonna hurt you.
I don't understand.
I have very few breaths left to explain, so don't interrupt.
Consider Count Dracula, who cannot bear to look in a mirror.
[PANTING.]
Agatha Dracula, who won't stand revealed in the sunlight, who cannot enter a home without invitation.
These aren't curses.
They are merely habits that become fetishes that become legends that even you believe.
The rules of the beast, as we discussed so very long ago.
But why? What are you afraid of? You are a warrior from a long line of warriors.
Your grandfather died in battle.
Your father, your brothers, your sons, their sons.
All of them fell as heroes on the battlefield.
But not you.
Not Count Dracula.
The warlord who skulks in the shadows and steals the lives of others.
Unwelcome everywhere.
Who sleeps in a box of dirt, yet dreams of a warrior's grave.
Who suddenly found himself in thrall of the girl in love with the thing he fears the most: death.
And now we know why this works.
No.
Because it speaks of the courage you long to possess.
The courage it takes to die.
I call you ashamed.
Count Dracula is ashamed.
I don't need this anymore.
I'm dying.
I am doing the one thing that you can never do, Dracula.
[GASPS.]
[WHIMPERS.]
You're in pain.
I'm equal to it.
You seek to conquer death, but you cannot until you face it without fear.
Goodbye, Count Dracula.
Shuffle back to your box of dirt.
The game is over.
You lose.
You will live forever in shame.
[BREATHING SHAKILY.]
[SIGHS.]
Beautiful.
[SIGHS.]
[DRACULA.]
Look at her, Agatha.
[BREATHES HEAVILY.]
It's beautiful.
[ZOE.]
This isn't real.
This is a dream.
[DRACULA.]
Of course it is.
[ZOE.]
You're drinking my blood.
But my blood is deadly to you.
[DRACULA.]
Yes.
[ZOE.]
So you'll die.
[DRACULA.]
So will you.
After all this time, did you think I'd let it hurt? [CRACKLING.]
[SOFT ETHEREAL MUSIC PLAYING.]
No! No! [DRACULA.]
Hello.
I've been dying to meet you.
[AGATHA.]
Count Dracula, have you eaten? I've worked up an appetite.
- Good thing there are two of you.
- No.
Under no circumstances are there two of us.
Take Mina, lose me.
I know you don't like to drink the blood of the dead.
You'd die to save this terrified child? - I'd die to save any terrified child.
- Why? Because I'm not like you.
There's a nobler purpose to my life than simply prolonging it.
Settle for her or take me and learn something.
Run.
Go, now! Agatha Van Helsing, I'm going to make you last.
[SIGHS DEEPLY.]
You'll be part of me.
You'll travel to the New World in my veins.
Come, boy, suckle.
[SNARLING.]
[THEME MUSIC PLAYING.]
[SEAGULLS SQUAWKING.]
[ALARM BLARING IN DISTANCE.]
[ALARM CONTINUES.]
[DOG BARKING IN DISTANCE.]
[FOOTSTEPS APPROACHING.]
[SIGHS.]
When did you get in? I didn't hear you.
Ugh.
Close the curtains, would you, love? Who are you? [GRUNTS.]
Sorry, I didn't mean to disturb you.
What are you doing here? Who are you? - Um - Are you a friend of Bob's? Oh, God, did you have to bring him home? Sorry.
He invited me in.
[SIGHS.]
What's the state of him? [DRACULA.]
He's downstairs.
Drunk? Well, that's certainly one way of putting it.
[SIGHS.]
What the bloody hell is going on? Shh.
Bob? Where's Bob? What? What've you done to me fridge? [DRACULA.]
Is the fridge the white box? Yeah.
Bob's in the fridge.
It took a bit of folding.
[DRACULA SIGHS.]
Look at her.
[SIGHS.]
So So beautiful.
[INHALES DEEPLY.]
Oh.
[DRACULA CHUCKLES.]
He's alive.
Oh, please, you mustn't worry.
He definitely isn't.
Just a bit restless.
[CREAKING.]
[HELICOPTER WHIRRING.]
[ZOE.]
Welcome to England, Count Dracula.
What kept you? Are you hungry? Agatha? How long? Do you need to feed now? How long was I in the water? One hundred and twenty-three years.
[LAUGHING.]
Is that all? [ZOE.]
I'm sorry? [DRACULA CONTINUES LAUGHING.]
Ah! You've been busy.
I like the flying thing.
What about this one over here? Does that fly too? No, that doesn't fly.
Okay, I think we've got this.
- You can head back.
- [PILOT.]
Roger that.
Departing.
You're not her, are you? But it's the same bloodline.
Unmistakable.
Ah.
- May I see that? - Stand your ground, soldier! It's not a weapon.
No, of course not.
It's a camera.
May I see it? Give it to him.
Yeah.
Boo! [ZOE.]
How did you recognize it? It can't look like any camera you've ever seen.
I've been around since the 15th century.
Things change.
You get used to it.
[DRACULA LAUGHS.]
You do seem to be accelerating, though.
Very good.
Smile.
Ah.
Please.
I'm sure you have a very pretty smile.
May I see it? Want to do it together? Hmm? Yeah? Ah.
Smile.
- There.
Smile.
- [SOLDIER.]
Drop your weapon! - Drop yours! - Drop it! [DRACULA.]
Drop yours! Now, please have mercy and smile.
I've been sleeping underwater for more than a century.
There are many advantages to being a vampire, but it does make it hard to be a morning person.
There.
That's better.
You see, I'm not so bad after all.
- Put it down! - Smile.
- Drop that weapon! - Don't shoot him.
Do not shoot him! - [SOLDIER.]
I said drop it! - Smile.
- [SOLDIER.]
Drop it now! - No.
I can hear your pulse.
[CHUCKLES.]
It's very lively now.
Van Helsing.
[SIGHS.]
Descendant, I assume.
Sister Agatha Van Helsing was my great-great aunt on my father's side.
I really liked her.
By my understanding, you killed her.
Killing is healthy competition.
Mercy is disrespect.
- [GASPS.]
- [BATS SCREECHING.]
No! [SOLDIER.]
Sir, what are your orders? I like the noise it makes.
That's a nice touch.
[CREAKING.]
[DRACULA.]
Listen, he's really not worth your sympathy.
He enjoyed hitting you, you know.
I've acquired some of your husband's memories.
I think you would say that I've downloaded them.
How? Orally.
[SHUDDERS.]
May I? [FRIDGE RATTLES.]
[KNIFE SLICES HANDS.]
[THUMPS.]
- [DRACULA.]
Kathleen, isn't it? - Yeah.
What's wrong with your servants, Kathleen? Is it their day off? I'm assuming you have staff.
You're clearly very wealthy.
- [KATHLEEN.]
Wealthy? - [CHUCKLES.]
Yes.
Well, look at all this stuff.
All this food.
The moving picture box.
And that thing outside.
Bob calls it, um a car.
Is that yours? Yeah.
And this treasure trove is your house.
It's a dump.
[DRACULA.]
It's amazing.
Kathleen, I've been a nobleman for 400 years.
I've lived in castles and palaces among the richest people of any age.
Never never have I stood in greater luxury than surrounds me now.
This is a chamber of marvels.
There isn't a king, or queen, or emperor that I have ever known or eaten who would step into this room and ever agree to leave it again.
I knew the future would bring wonders.
I did not know it would make them ordinary.
[KATHLEEN SHUDDERS.]
Four hundred years? Ah, sorry.
Five hundred, actually.
I slept in.
Who are you? I'm a vampire.
No.
No, don't be silly, Kathleen.
You know it's true.
People always know.
Trust the hairs on the back of your neck.
I'm the reason you have them.
Now [CLEARS THROAT.]
there usually are questions.
Um Do you have a reflection? - I'm sorry? - In the mirror.
They don't have reflections in the films, vampires.
Do I look like someone who can't see himself in the mirror? Hmm? Uh [DRACULA.]
Most of the vampire legends are wrong or misunderstood.
But mirrors I don't see any less in the mirror than you do.
I see more.
[GASPS AND PANTS.]
["SYMPHONY NO.
5" BY BEETHOVEN PLAYS.]
Ah! No.
[CHUCKLES.]
Do you have an orchestra? [SHAKILY.]
Hello? Ah.
[BURPS.]
Telephone.
Thank you, Bob.
[THUMPING FROM ABOVE.]
Who else is up there? [BREATHES SHAKILY.]
Ah! [SIGHS.]
[PHONE RINGING.]
[RINGING CONTINUES.]
Get in the box.
[DRACULA.]
How did you find me? It's not difficult to follow a trail of devastation.
The sun is up.
You need to get in the box.
Um You may not have noticed, but there's a roof over my head.
[ZOE.]
I've noticed.
[DRACULA YELLS.]
Get in the box.
Did you hear me? Are you in the box? Meet me downstairs.
Hello? Count Dracula? Hello? Okay, I'm coming in.
Keep in mind, I've got people outside.
Anything happens to me, they're gonna tear the roof off and let you burn.
Hello? [WHISPERING.]
Where are you? [FRIDGE OPENS.]
[BOB.]
Kill me! Kill me! Kill me! Kill me! Scared yet? [HISSES.]
[BREATHING HEAVILY.]
[ZOE.]
You're killing me.
[DRACULA.]
It doesn't have to hurt.
[DRACULA RETCHES.]
[DRACULA VOMITING.]
[SNARLS.]
[ZOE.]
Get the box.
Get him in the box.
[BREATHING HEAVILY.]
Look at me.
Look at me! [SNARLING.]
[SOLDIER.]
Where do we put him? [WOMAN.]
Straight to isolation.
Johnny? [MOBILE PHONE VIBRATING.]
[PHONE BEEPS.]
[PHONE VIBRATING.]
[PHONE VIBRATING.]
[SIGHS DEEPLY.]
[PHONE BEEPS.]
Hey.
[WOMAN.]
Tonight.
You could bring someone.
Who? [WOMAN.]
I don't know.
Just bring someone.
[SCOFFS.]
[WOMAN.]
You're not getting all sentimental on me, are you? 'Course not.
[SIGHS.]
[WOMAN.]
Sentimental is just stalking.
See you later.
Bye.
[CHUCKLES SOFTLY.]
[CAMERA SHUTTER CLICKING.]
[CLICKING CONTINUES.]
[WOMAN.]
Lucy! What time did you get in last night? It's not healthy.
Yeah.
I'll sleep when I'm dead.
[PHONE DINGS.]
[BUBBLES POPPING.]
Takin' over the streets Gonna live forever Got the world at our feet Gonna live forever Just drunk on power At the top, every hour Every minute, every day, our way In your face, check it [RAP MUSIC CONTINUES INDISTINCTLY.]
Hey! Quincey! [RAP MUSIC CONTINUES.]
Everyone, this is Quincey.
He's an American from Texas.
- Texas.
- Evenin'.
[GIRL.]
Never known a cowboy before.
Are you a cowboy, Quincey? - Uh No.
Not really, ma'am.
No.
- Uh-huh.
- "Ma'am"? - [QUINCEY.]
I mean, I ride quite a bit, - but I've never really - He rides? Come on, cowboy.
Let's dance.
[RAP MUSIC CONTINUES.]
[TECHNO MUSIC PLAYING.]
I need to pee.
So, I never asked you what you do.
Luce didn't seem sure.
Like a nurse or somethin'? I'm a junior doctor.
But I want to specialize in mental health.
You? Lucy says you've got money.
Uh [CHUCKLES.]
I guess.
You've gotta wonder if she'd be into me if I wasn't rich.
But then, would I like her if she was ugly? [LAUGHS.]
They do have actual loos here, you know.
There's a queue.
You're terrible.
Shut up.
It's quicker out here.
No, I'm talking about Jack.
What about Jack? Now, don't tell me you haven't seen the look on his face.
It's not like I've never shagged him.
What is he complaining about? I think he might be in love with you.
Don't be daft.
It was like three times.
Four, depending what you count.
You'll get a reputation.
[LAUGHS.]
What? - Thank you, Queen Victoria.
- Well, you know what I mean.
I do.
It's called slut-shaming.
Yeah, it takes one to know one.
Why shouldn't I have fun? Jesus, I'm only 22.
It's not like I'm gonna marry anyone.
[BOTH LAUGHING.]
[ELECTRONIC DANCE MUSIC PLAYING.]
If it's any consolation, I think you're very cute.
I mean, I know you're not gay.
I mean, obviously, what with Lucy and all.
Three times, four.
I mean, no, I just wanted to Look, sorry.
Sorry.
I wish I'd never [MOBILE PHONE VIBRATING.]
[CROWD SQUEALS.]
Oh, my God.
Yes, yes, yes! [CONFETTI POPS.]
[MOBILE PHONE CONTINUES TO VIBRATE.]
[GIRLS CHANTING.]
Married! Married! Married! Married! Well, I hope they'll be very happy.
Neither do I.
[LAUGHS.]
Want to get a drink? Yeah, but, uh I can't.
See you.
[GIRLS GIGGLING.]
Go! [CAR ACCELERATING.]
[DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYING.]
- I didn't have time to bring anything.
- You don't need anything.
We've been trying to contact you for hours.
Sorry.
I was in a club.
It was noisy.
So you've actually found him.
- You weren't drinking? - I don't drink.
Good.
Neither does he.
In here.
What do I do with my clothes? Just leave them on the chair.
Is this information up to date? Um Yeah, I think so.
How many of us are there? [WOMAN.]
You're about to meet everyone.
Here.
Can you put this on, please? - Hello, Jack.
- Zoe Dr.
Helsing.
- How are you feeling? - Well, it's a big day for science.
I suppose I wasn't really expecting it on my watch.
I meant, how are you? Oh.
Asymptomatic so far.
Trying not to think about it.
I thought you were withdrawing from the program.
- I thought there was a girl.
- Yeah.
I did too.
Well, come on.
The briefing's started.
[WOMAN.]
So, this is the main part of the ship.
Basically undisturbed for over 100 years.
The original teams were looking in the wrong place.
No one realized quite how close Count Dracula's ship got to the British mainland.
Oh, hello.
- Jack Seward.
- [WOMAN.]
Hello, Jack.
Sorry to be so late.
Oh, don't worry.
I haven't got to the good bit yet.
Another O-negative, I see? [WOMAN IN AUDIENCE.]
Vanilla.
[CHUCKLES.]
Welcome, Jack.
There's nothing wrong with vanilla.
We searched the wreck for three days, but what we were looking for was approximately 200 yards south of it.
[WOMAN.]
Now, a box this old, you'd expect at least a few barnacles.
But look at it.
Untouched by any living thing.
[JACK, SOFTLY.]
Well, there you are.
Your life's work.
You don't look so happy.
Yeah.
I'm as happy as the pope would be if Jesus actually turned up.
As you can see, even after 123 years, the body was perfectly preserved.
Or so we thought.
[CLASS GASPS.]
[CLASS.]
Oh! [WOMAN.]
The body was not preserved.
Dracula was, in fact, alive, though dormant.
Apparently, in some kind of restorative coma, in which he would've remained if I hadn't been stupid enough to feed him.
So, in case you're wondering, yeah, vampire's bite.
[CHUCKLES SOFTLY.]
You need to know what you're signing up for.
We will keep you safe.
But this isn't just about giving blood.
It's not just another student drug trial.
There is a reason it is better paid.
Now, you will have controlled exposure to a vampire.
- Are we clear? - [ZOE, SOFTLY.]
Bye.
[WOMAN.]
Obviously, at this point, having triggered his revivification, we opted for tactical retreat.
We resealed the box so nothing could interfere with the process, and we monitored from the shore.
It took Dracula another ten hours to fully revive.
And of course, we were waiting for him on the beach.
Why? Did you hear me? Why is that there? What is it for? It's a toilet.
I'm a vampire.
Why have you given me a toilet? [DOOR OPENS AND CLOSES.]
[ZOE.]
Good morning, Count Dracula.
How are you settling in? Well, uh, I have a chemical toilet and this.
You have every book written during your coma and somewhere to sit.
Well, I need more than books, Zoe.
[MECHANICAL WHIRRING.]
[WHIRRING CONTINUES.]
[WHIRRING STOPS.]
Take off your coat and roll up your left sleeve.
[DRACULA.]
Why? Because I told you to and I can break you with a sunbeam.
[UNLOCKING.]
I'm coming in.
Make any attempt to attack me, and my colleague will fully open the roof and burn you to a crisp.
Do you understand? So, you're a doctor this time, are you? I think I preferred the disappointed nun.
I'm a scientist.
Well, that amounts to the same thing.
I'm not Sister Agatha.
I'm Dr.
Helsing, and I'm the woman in charge of this foundation.
In charge of it? [CHUCKLES.]
Oh, of course.
I suppose women's rights are just something you slept through.
Women's what? Did you say rights? - You'll get the hang of it.
- No, no, no.
Please try and explain.
I missed an entire century.
What are rights? Nobody has rights, Zoe.
Man, woman, or monster.
No one, nowhere.
It's just a lunatic fantasy.
Or civilization, as we like to call it.
- Give me your left arm.
- Why? Because you're going to give blood.
Well, this is a first.
So tell me, what is the Jonathan Harker Foundation? I can't seem to penetrate the skin.
No? Give it to me.
Take this.
Hold this.
[SIGHS.]
Johnny was a fine man.
What has this place got to do with him? - Oh, you remember Harker, then? - Mm-hmm.
This foundation was set up by Mina Murray, his fiancée.
Do you remember her? [SCREAMING.]
Barely.
Insipid little thing.
Flavorless, one imagines.
Well, you left her alive.
Go, now! When her father died, she inherited his fortune.
And with the cooperation of Sister Agatha's extended family, they set up this foundation in Jonathan's name.
So, you run the family firm? I've always approved of inherited power.
Democracy is the tyranny of the uninformed.
Only in blood do we find the truth, Zoe.
[ZOE.]
Our primary purpose is medical research, but with the stipulation that were you ever to be found, you would be trapped, studied, understood, and humanely fed.
- You're a unique specimen.
- No.
I'm a 500-year-old warlord.
And I know mercenaries when I see them.
Who's funding this place? Because people who can afford mercenaries are very rarely interested in medicine.
You're withholding information.
I'm giving you everything.
Blood is lives.
Everything is in the blood, Zoe, if you know how to read it.
Do you know how to read it? You couldn't read mine.
You choked on it.
I remember the flavor, though.
Um What is that? You're fast.
You're clever.
Driven.
But driven by what? Agatha was always trying to save everybody, but you You hold yourself apart.
Friendless, loveless, childless, compromised, corrupt even.
Ah.
Zoe Helsing, there's a shadow on your heart.
I've sampled its bitter bouquet before, and these days, I believe you call it [SNARLING.]
cancer.
That's why your blood was poison to me.
You're dying.
Doctor, I need to talk to you.
- What is it? Who's this? - Oh, hi, Frank.
Sorry, yes.
Hello.
Bit late.
Trains.
What're you thinking? Get rid of him.
Throw him out the bloody building.
Dr.
Helsing, I think you'd better listen.
Who are you? [DRACULA.]
I'm sorry.
That's rude of me.
Um, this is Frank Renfield.
We've been, um, Skyping.
Hello.
Dr.
Helsing, isn't it? I'm sure we can sort all this out.
Skyping? Ah, yes.
Um Thanks for this.
You're online? You're not supposed to be online.
Well, don't you know how these things work? Terribly clever.
Who gave him the Wi-Fi password? Well, it's my name.
Oh, Jesus.
[WOMAN.]
Tell Dr.
Helsing who you are.
Right, well, yes.
I'm Count Dracula's lawyer.
- His what? - His lawyer.
His lawyer? Sorry.
Well, not sorry.
But, you know, I'm afraid it does look like you're keeping him here against his will, and whilst my client doesn't want to make a fuss, well, that's not really on, is it? - Since when do you have a lawyer? - Um 1896.
Exactly, yes.
We've been representing Count Dracula since September the 12th, 1896.
Well, Hawkins and Wentworth have.
Wasn't there myself.
Not that old.
[LAUGHS.]
No offense.
1896? [FRANK.]
We purchased some properties for the count and arranged his resettlement.
Does it bother you that the man who engaged your firm in 1896 is standing over there without a single gray hair? Ah.
Thank you.
[FRANK.]
Oh, it does.
Yes, quite a lot.
Really, in fact, I think it's properly frightening.
Don't you? But the thing is, you see, being well over a century old is not actually against the law.
What's against the law is you locking him up.
I think you might've forgotten, Dr.
Helsing, Count Dracula has rights.
Yeah.
He's a bloody vampire! I feel that's an emotionally loaded term.
It is the correct term.
It's not a legal term.
Has he harmed anyone? - Yes.
- No.
- Well, on the beach - No.
There were rumors of an incident on the beach a few nights ago, but there was no trace of anything the following morning.
And everyone has stopped talking about it.
So, either there's been some sort of cover-up, in which case, the police will certainly be interested, or there was no incident to cover up in the first place, and my client is guilty of nothing.
Which would you prefer? After all, why would a medical research facility have access to uh I don't know, let's say, mercenaries.
I'm not curious for myself, you understand, but [INHALES DEEPLY.]
people are such gossips.
Count Dracula has given a deadline for his release.
Eleven minutes past eight this evening.
Slightly odd timing.
But he has his ways.
It's not odd.
It's not odd at all, Mr.
Renfield.
Eleven minutes past eight is sunset.
[CHUCKLES SOFTLY.]
[KEYPAD CLICKING.]
[DRACULA.]
I'm sending you an e-mail.
"Dear Zoe, Thank you for being such a courteous host.
It is, however, the tradition that the courteous host must speed the parting guest, and I'm sure you will accord with this.
Also, thank you for your offer of food.
However, it is not my practice to eat cattle.
In the matter of blood, I'm a connoisseur.
Blood is lives.
Blood is testimony.
The testimony of everyone I've ever destroyed flows in my veins.
I will choose with care who joins them now.
Ripeness is the first moment of decay.
Sweetness is the promise of corruption.
I shall look for the perfect fruit of this world.
[CHUCKLING.]
And I will find it.
Never doubt that.
I will find it.
Blood is everything you need to know, Zoe, if you understand how to read it.
Have you worked out how yet? If you ever hope to match me, you'll have to.
" [FRANK.]
The Jonathan Harker Foundation, terribly interesting, did some tremendous work during the last two flu outbreaks, but their funding stream is, to say the least, opaque.
One might almost say occult.
- [SIRENS BLARING.]
- [MOBILE PHONE VIBRATING.]
[PHONE BEEPS.]
[LUCY.]
Where did you go? Are you sulking? Just 'cause I got engaged? Jack, don't sulk.
Um, Jack's not here at the moment.
- Who shall I say called? - [LUCY.]
Oh, sorry.
Tell him it's Lucy.
Lucy Westenra.
Who's this? Hello, Lucy Westenra.
I'm Count Dracula.
[SLOW DRAMATIC MUSIC PLAYING.]
[MUSIC ENDS.]
[DRACULA.]
Agatha Van Helsing.
You'll be part of me.
You'll travel to the New World in my veins.
Come, boy, suckle.
[SNARLING.]
[GASPS.]
[WIND WHISTLING.]
[LAUGHING.]
[CAMERA SHUTTER CLICKS.]
- I can't do two more days of this.
- What? - I feel bloody terrible already.
- Lightweight.
- Stick your head out the window.
- It's the Jägerbombs.
That last one tasted like furniture polish.
- Where are the crisps? - I can't get the taste out of my mouth.
Somebody said they were getting crisps.
We only have plain ones.
Plain? Oh, Jesus.
What's good about no flavor? [FRANK.]
What was wrong with the physicist? [SIGHS.]
No flavor.
And the tennis player? Stringy.
Master, I am trying to provide you with precisely the skill sets you're hoping to acquire.
Listen, for 500 years, I have not had to exercise, but these days, everything is done for you, and everything is being delivered, even food.
- [GIRL.]
We nearly there? - [BOY.]
Another 20 minutes.
What? - I'm just texting.
- I know that face.
- What face? - Yours.
"Will you be hungry later?" Master, you came to me with a program, a plan, some genuinely fresh initiatives for Well, let's call it what it is, world domination.
May I ask, as your lawyer, what are you doing with your time? You can't afford to feed on just anyone.
Oh, dot, dot, dot.
There's a reply coming.
- Give it back.
- Are you not eating with us? - She's drinking with us.
- Give it here.
Ah Reply's in.
"Is that an offer?" Lucy Westenra, you're getting married.
Yeah, final days as a free woman.
- Give it here.
- Uh-uh.
How shall I reply? Yes.
Just say yes.
[BOY.]
"Miss Westenra is available for a late dinner.
" I'm saying "late.
" We've got karaoke.
So who's this one, then? D? [GIRL.]
Who's D? How about this one? Staying locally, double first from Oxford, martial arts expert, non-drinker.
- Ah! - [TEXT MESSAGE BEEPS.]
Sorry.
Already have dinner plans.
I am trying, Dark Lord.
I do sometimes wonder what it is that you actually want.
[SIGHS DEEPLY.]
[TEXT MESSAGE DINGS.]
[FRIENDS LAUGHING.]
[ELECTRONIC DANCE MUSIC PLAYING.]
Uh, what about the Harker Foundation? Are they still taking an interest? Hmm, there is some activity.
However, your lady friend has left their employ.
My lady friend? Dr.
Helsing.
I'm unclear exactly what's happened, but I'm assuming she'll take no further interest in you.
Hmm.
[YAWNS.]
What's the time? Half two.
[CHUCKLES.]
You know what? I think there's blood in my alcohol stream.
Yeah.
- Did you hear what I said? - I did.
- There's blood - In your alcohol stream.
It was hilarious.
It's the wrong way around, you see? Stop, you're killing me.
Are you even drunk? Were you even drinking properly? Maybe I'm saving myself.
For dinner? - Mm.
- For D? Don't.
Who's hungry at this time of night? [GRUNTS.]
You sure about all this? All what? Marrying Quincey.
I like him.
You're supposed to love him.
Okay, I love him, then.
'Cause he loves you, and Jack loves you.
Everybody loves you.
Yeah.
I'm pretty.
That happens.
Woo! Listen to her.
Do you know what it's like when you're pretty? Yes.
[CHUCKLES SOFTLY.]
Everybody smiles.
You never see the world without a big, stupid smile on its face.
[BOY.]
Mm.
The thing you don't get [SIGHS DEEPLY.]
marriage is for life.
Yeah, but life isn't forever.
[TEXT MESSAGE DINGS.]
[CHUCKLES SOFTLY.]
[PHONE DINGING.]
Ah! Tart.
Hungry.
Could've waited.
Need to feed on someone, Lucy.
You don't always give your consent.
I bet this one didn't.
Fast food.
So why does my consent matter? It doesn't, but it's delicious.
I'm a gourmet, not a glutton.
Why always a graveyard? I like to spend time with people my own age.
[LAUGHS.]
Yeah, funny guy.
Very funny.
Where will you be buried? Why? Because I might want to visit.
That's next-level clingy.
- Thank God I'm being cremated.
- No.
Shut up.
Everyone here's just wasted space for this.
Listen to me.
Do not let them burn you.
Why not? It hurts.
[LAUGHS.]
Never heard anyone complain.
Well, I have.
I'd say there are nine here.
Yes.
Nine.
Nine what? Sufferers.
Come here.
Give me your hand.
[LUCY GIGGLES.]
What am I doing? Listening.
[FAINT KNOCKING.]
[KNOCKING.]
What's that? What does it sound like? [KNOCKING.]
[KNOCKING.]
- Knocking.
- [DRACULA.]
Knocking, yes.
On a coffin lid.
[KNOCKING CONTINUES.]
From the inside.
[MAN, MUFFLED.]
Turn on the lights, please.
Someone turn on the light.
It's so dark.
[WOMAN, MUFFLED.]
I can't find my face.
I can't feel it.
- [KNOCKING.]
- [WOMAN.]
Help me! Are they vampires? Nothing so evolved.
They're just undead.
The unfortunate few who remain sentient as they rot.
[INDISTINCT PLEADING.]
[DRACULA.]
Ah.
The children of the night.
What music they make.
[PLEADING CONTINUES.]
Ah! [MAN.]
Please! [CHILD'S VOICE.]
Bloofer lady.
Bloofer lady.
Bloofer lady.
Bloofer? Beautiful.
He means you.
[CHILD.]
Bloofer lady.
How does he know I'm here? Because he's looking at you.
Right there.
Bloofer lady.
Bloofer lady play peekaboo.
[CHILD.]
Peekaboo.
Some of the little ones wriggle their way to the surface.
I think they can smell the worms.
[GASPS SOFTLY.]
Can you see me? [SOFTLY.]
No, no, no.
No, no! Don't play with him.
He'll follow you home.
Would he really? You know, in a very, very long life, I don't think I've ever met anyone quite like you.
You really don't care, do you? The perfect fruit.
[GRUNTS.]
[SIGHS.]
Lucy? Shit.
[BEEPS.]
[BOY SIGHS.]
[DRACULA.]
Dying is the only remaining novelty.
Every other human experience is cataloged somewhere in your endless, chattering libraries.
Nothing comes fresh.
Every living instant is shop-soiled and secondhand, except that one moment in life that no one can report back on.
In a world of traveled roads, death is the last unprinted snow.
You don't have to talk a lot of shit.
You know, people don't usually say that to me.
Yeah, you kill them before they can.
Basically, you're blocking people.
[DRACULA BREATHES DEEPLY.]
- Do you love me? - No.
- Will you ever love me? - No.
Well, that's one less thing to worry about.
Aren't you even a little scared of me? Aren't you afraid of anything? Even dying? Everybody dies.
Lucy, you're a very special flavor.
Two minutes.
If you've still got the appetite.
- Three.
- Five.
Special treat.
What do you want to dream about tonight? Put me somewhere beautiful.
Where no one can see me.
Where I don't have to smile.
[SIGHS.]
[MOANING.]
Unscrupulous doctor deployed tanner's knife.
Twelve letters.
Ah.
Dracula [FLY BUZZING.]
is my lord.
[BOY.]
Lucy? Lucy? Lucy.
Luce.
What the hell? [BOY OVER PHONE.]
Jack, please, you've gotta see her.
She won't see doctors, but she might see you.
Stop.
[CHUCKLES SOFTLY.]
[PHONE LINE RINGING.]
[JACK.]
Could I speak to Dr.
Helsing, please? No.
No, I didn't know that.
[GASPS.]
Hello.
Did somebody send you? Look, sorry, no offense, but I am really not a believer.
[JACK.]
Zoe? Sorry, I didn't mean to Oh, Jack.
Hello.
Sorry, I was dreaming.
Please come in.
[JACK.]
Thanks.
Sorry if I startled you.
No, no, you didn't.
Ugh.
Try again, I'm incredibly bored.
- I didn't bring any grapes or anything.
- I hate grapes.
In that case, you're welcome.
Very kind of you to come and see your old mentor.
Is it, Jack? Is it kind? Oh, Jack.
You're my star pupil.
I only suggested you for the donor program so you could get some easy money.
Get you through college.
I never thought Dracula would actually come back.
[JACK.]
Nobody did.
So what do you think? About Lucy? It's possible.
Could be him.
Dracula chooses his victims for a reason.
Is there anything special about her? I love her.
But she's a perfectly ordinary girl.
She can't be.
Because if it is Dracula, what keeps him coming back for more? [SIGHS.]
[KEYPAD CLICKING.]
Hello? Who's down there? Is that you? [CHILD.]
Peekaboo.
[BREATHING HEAVILY.]
Peekaboo.
Bloofer lady.
[GASPING.]
- [CHILD.]
Peekaboo.
- [DRACULA.]
May I come in? [CHILD.]
Peekaboo.
[LUCY BREATHING SHAKILY.]
[LUCY GASPING.]
[DRACULA.]
Please avert your eyes.
I, um have to murder a child as we used to say in Vladivostok.
- [SQUELCHES.]
- [CHILD SCREAMS.]
[DRACULA SIGHS.]
I'm ill.
Well, not ill, precisely.
[LUCY.]
Look at my face.
[SOFTLY.]
So, so beautiful.
I'm as white as a sheet.
As the last unprinted snow.
Am I dying? [DRACULA.]
You're mortal.
You've been dying since the day you were born.
[DRACULA SIGHS.]
My people have a saying, "One should always speed the parting guest.
" [LUCY BREATHES HEAVILY.]
[KNOCKING ON DOOR.]
[WOMAN.]
How you feeling, love? [FLY BUZZES.]
[WOMAN.]
Just gonna make some tea.
Want some? [FLY BUZZING.]
[WOMAN.]
I'll bring you a cuppa.
You stay there.
You need to keep your strength up.
[FOOTSTEPS RECEDING.]
Help me! Help me! Help me! Help me! Shh.
Hush, Lucy, you're mine now.
You've nothing left to fear.
You won't be long in your grave.
Your mind screams aloud, but for now, your body must be silent.
[FEMALE PRIEST.]
In the midst of life, we are in death.
Of whom may we seek for succor, but of thee, O Lord, who, for our sins, art justly displeased.
Yet, O Lord God most holy, deliver us not into the bitter pains of eternal death.
["ANGELS" PLAYING.]
I sit and wait Does an angel Contemplate my faith And do they know The places where we go When we're gray and old [CRIES.]
No! No! Help me! [SCREAMING.]
That salvation lets their wings unfold So when I'm lying in my bed Thoughts running through my head And I feel that love is dead Come on.
I'm loving angels instead And through it all She offers me protection A lot of love and affection Whether I'm right or wrong And down the waterfall Wherever it may take me It's like I can hear her.
I can feel her crying for me.
I'm loving angels instead [SCREAMING.]
Help! [METALLIC CLANGING.]
Hello? [METALLIC CLANG.]
Hello, is someone there? Is someone here? Did someone open the furnace? It's not supposed to be open yet.
[LUCY.]
Did you put me - Oh, my - in the fire? [SCRIBBLING ON PAPER.]
I'll be with you in a moment.
Where am I? [AGATHA.]
That is not the question, Zoe.
I may call you Zoe, mayn't I? The question is, what are Dracula's limitations? So, we know three things: he cannot enter an abode without an invitation, he cannot stand in the sunlight, and he fears, above all things, the sight of the cross.
But you see, we are wrong.
These three things must be one thing, much tidier.
God is always tidy Well, according to his own account.
Oh, do stop hanging your mouth open like that.
Dracula drank my blood, and you drank his.
Blood is lives.
What's left of mine is in him and now also in you.
As he promised, I have traveled to the New World in his veins.
There are an awful lot of people in Dracula's blood, but I suppose my DNA syncs with yours.
Oh.
What a useful vocabulary I now have.
- Who are you? - It's perfectly obvious who I am.
- So, what does Dracula fear? - I don't know.
Or what does he want, then? I don't know.
Yes, you do.
He returned to feed on Lucy Westenra time and time again.
Well, he could feed off anyone in London, anyone in the world.
Why return to one perfectly ordinary girl night after night? Who are you? Who do I look like? Me.
Correct.
Now, think, think, think.
What does he want and what does he fear? I don't know.
I don't care.
It's not my problem anymore.
I am inside your head.
I feel your guilt.
Your foundation, it was funded by Oh, I can't see it.
You don't like to think about it, do you? Wherever that money came from, I did good with it.
[AGATHA.]
For many years, yes.
But you also brought Dracula back to life with it.
So he's still very much your problem, and you know that.
[SIGHS DEEPLY.]
What can I do? Poor child.
As our Lord said that night in Gethsemane, "The spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak.
" Tell me who you are.
I am the spirit and you are the flesh.
The darkness of Dracula shall guide us to the light.
I'm dying.
I'm dead.
But I am Sister Agatha Van Helsing of the Saint Mary's Convent, Budapest, and neither of us are quite done yet.
[MOBILE PHONE VIBRATING.]
[PHONE BEEPS.]
[ZOE.]
I need you to pick me up from the hospital.
I'm discharging myself.
Zoe, you're dying.
Well, don't take too long then.
[LUCY.]
Beautiful.
Beautiful lady.
Bloofer lady.
So, Master, in conclusion, I feel we should continue to consider the Harker Foundation an active personal threat.
[SNIFFS.]
Sixty-two, I think.
[SNIFFS.]
Accountant.
[FRANK.]
We shall, of course, continue to monitor their activities using agents local to the area, some discrete hacking, and, at your suggestion, uh, bats.
Can I just You don't look very surprised.
You don't look very dead.
I'm getting there.
Finding you wasn't difficult.
A man of your breeding and ego is temperamentally incapable of hiding.
One just looks for an unnecessarily tall building, multiple exits, and no view of a church.
Also, your number's listed.
How kind of you.
Bringing a bottle to the party.
Very inferior vintage but the gesture is appreciated.
- [ZOE.]
Put him down.
- Why? This is England.
Conversation precedes dinner.
Quite right, Dr.
Helsing.
[DRACULA SIGHS.]
You're expecting company? Yes.
- Lucy Westenra.
- [DRACULA.]
Oh, you know her? Well, this is Dr.
Seward.
It was his phone you stole.
[JACK.]
You might say I introduced you.
Ah, and now she's dead.
[CHUCKLES.]
[ZOE.]
If you're expecting Lucy to rise from the grave this evening, Count Dracula, you might be interested to know that she was cremated.
Cremated? But I told her.
I warned her.
And still, she let them put her in the fire? - Apparently.
- No, no.
You don't understand.
She would've been conscious the whole time.
Her flesh melting, every cell carbonized, every particle of her being incinerated.
Stings a bit, I believe.
[DOORBELL BUZZES.]
[DRACULA.]
There.
You see? You have underestimated the resilience of the vampire.
- [DOORBELL BUZZING INCESSANTLY.]
- Ah! I always liked a lively one.
Um, Dr.
Seward she was your friend, was she? Yes.
Now might be a good time to reflect that beauty is only skin-deep.
Pray for her, Jack.
Remember, it is the soul not the aspect that one loves.
Dr.
Helsing, you don't sound quite yourself.
Are you all right? Perfectly.
[LUCY.]
Hello, you.
[DRACULA.]
Did you have much trouble finding the place? [LUCY.]
I can always sniff you out, babe.
Jack.
Oh, Jack, what are you doing here? Oh! And who's this? Finally, you bring someone.
Bit pale though, if you don't mind me saying.
[INHALES.]
Did you start without me? [ZOE.]
I'm not on the menu.
I'm an old friend.
We go way back.
[LUCY.]
Why are you just standing there, Jack? [EXHALES SHARPLY.]
Kiss me.
Kiss me, Jack.
Kiss me.
Lucy, no.
Come on, Jack.
Kiss me like you used to.
Kiss me.
[SIGHS.]
Kiss the girl, Dr.
Seward.
Journeys end in lovers meeting.
[LUCY.]
What's wrong, Jack? You can't look at me now? The boy who looks at me all day, every day, can't you look now? What's the matter, Jack? Lucy, can't you see yourself? Of course I can see myself.
[SIGHS.]
Bloofer lady.
Bloofer lady.
[INHALES.]
Everyone Everyone smiles when you're beautiful.
Why aren't you smiling, Jack? If you're so beautiful, Lucy, why don't you take a selfie? You smell funny.
She's dying.
[ZOE.]
We wear the bitter bouquet, Lucy.
The blood of the dying is death to the vampire.
You smell of death.
It's not just me.
[SIGHING.]
[LUCY SCREAMS.]
My patient, Dr.
Seward.
[CRYING.]
[DRACULA.]
My patient.
[LUCY SOBBING.]
Lucy, my love.
It's a shock.
It's a shock.
But you've done so well.
- You've done so well.
- [GASPING.]
Look at me.
I see you, bloofer lady.
[LUCY.]
Will I always be like this? Yes.
Promise.
Always.
But I was beautiful.
Beauty's never more than a disguise, Lucy.
You've outgrown it.
I don't want to! I don't want to! [DRACULA.]
Lucy, listen.
- [LUCY CRYING.]
- [DRACULA.]
Shh.
Listen to me.
Listen.
Listen to me.
[LUCY CONTINUES CRYING.]
[YELLS.]
Listen! [LUCY SOBS.]
You're my finest bride yet.
In 500 years, you were the only one who willingly opened up her veins.
[LUCY CONTINUES CRYING.]
You knew what was happening.
- No.
- You embraced it.
You accepted it.
Now you can live forever.
Oh, yeah? Like this? Look at me! - I don't mind.
- Oh, don't you? No.
Oh, well, I do! I mind! [WAILING.]
[WHIMPERING.]
Lucy.
Kiss me.
[LUCY.]
No, no, no! [SCOFFS.]
[CRYING.]
You don't You don't want to kiss me like this.
[JACK.]
Lucy Westenra, there has never been a day I didn't want to kiss you.
And there never will be.
[SOBBING.]
Oh, Jack.
Oh, Jack.
[LUCY SNIFFLES AND SOBS.]
Do it.
Jack, do it.
For me.
Do it for me.
[GASPS.]
[STAKE CLATTERS ON GROUND.]
[SOBBING.]
[SNIFFLES.]
She was my most promising experiment.
Took me 500 years to make a bride this good.
Now look what you've done.
[JACK.]
She was never yours.
[SNIFFLES.]
Or mine.
[SIGHS.]
Or anyone's.
[DRACULA.]
Well, I suppose she died well.
That's a rare quality, you can take it from me.
Quality or flavor? Ah.
Flavor.
Very particular.
In my experience unique.
She almost seemed in love with death.
That's it.
That is everything.
And that's why her.
Jack, you must go.
I can't leave you.
I'm about to have a personal conversation with Count Dracula.
And I'm certain he won't want it witnessed.
Why not? Because there's only one thing in this world that you're truly afraid of, and finally, I know what it is.
Uh, I don't.
I know you don't.
Dr.
Seward, you may leave.
- Get out.
- Dr.
Helsing - [ZOE.]
No, Jack.
- I can't If you want to throw your life away in some act of selfless heroism, there will be other opportunities.
It's going to be a beautiful day.
Thank you.
Well, how did it taste? [DOOR CLOSES.]
How did what taste? [LAUGHS.]
Dr.
Helsing, I think you drank my blood.
[SCREAMS.]
[SCREAMING.]
[BREATHING HEAVILY.]
It's 93 million miles away.
It really isn't gonna hurt you.
I don't understand.
I have very few breaths left to explain, so don't interrupt.
Consider Count Dracula, who cannot bear to look in a mirror.
[PANTING.]
Agatha Dracula, who won't stand revealed in the sunlight, who cannot enter a home without invitation.
These aren't curses.
They are merely habits that become fetishes that become legends that even you believe.
The rules of the beast, as we discussed so very long ago.
But why? What are you afraid of? You are a warrior from a long line of warriors.
Your grandfather died in battle.
Your father, your brothers, your sons, their sons.
All of them fell as heroes on the battlefield.
But not you.
Not Count Dracula.
The warlord who skulks in the shadows and steals the lives of others.
Unwelcome everywhere.
Who sleeps in a box of dirt, yet dreams of a warrior's grave.
Who suddenly found himself in thrall of the girl in love with the thing he fears the most: death.
And now we know why this works.
No.
Because it speaks of the courage you long to possess.
The courage it takes to die.
I call you ashamed.
Count Dracula is ashamed.
I don't need this anymore.
I'm dying.
I am doing the one thing that you can never do, Dracula.
[GASPS.]
[WHIMPERS.]
You're in pain.
I'm equal to it.
You seek to conquer death, but you cannot until you face it without fear.
Goodbye, Count Dracula.
Shuffle back to your box of dirt.
The game is over.
You lose.
You will live forever in shame.
[BREATHING SHAKILY.]
[SIGHS.]
Beautiful.
[SIGHS.]
[DRACULA.]
Look at her, Agatha.
[BREATHES HEAVILY.]
It's beautiful.
[ZOE.]
This isn't real.
This is a dream.
[DRACULA.]
Of course it is.
[ZOE.]
You're drinking my blood.
But my blood is deadly to you.
[DRACULA.]
Yes.
[ZOE.]
So you'll die.
[DRACULA.]
So will you.
After all this time, did you think I'd let it hurt? [CRACKLING.]
[SOFT ETHEREAL MUSIC PLAYING.]