Julia (2022) s01e03 Episode Script
Boeuf Bourguignon
1
There you go.
First floor,
right off the staircase.
Has anyone seen my stapler?
Okay. Uh,
"State House Rules."
Where are we?
Doing great.
We got a nice lineup.
Did you get the mayor?
Not yet, but we're
working on it.
I want the mayor, Roger.
Make it happen.
Make me happy.
I'm Roland.
That's what I Yes, alright.
I think that's all,
friends and neighbors.
Whoa! Whoa.
Uh, synaptic misfire.
Almost forgot
the most important thing.
Where are we with
"The French Chef"?
It's been three days.
Oh.
Um
Right.
Look, yeah.
I know.
What do you know?
The show.
She's not a professional.
Uh-huh.
I mean, "A" for effort, right?
At least it didn't
cost us too much.
I liked it.
You did?
I did.
He liked it.
And Tilly loved it.
She made the coq au vin
Is that
how you say it? It sounds dirty.
But she hasn't been able
to stop talking
about Julia Child
with her friends.
Hunter Now, it's not polished,
Hunter Now, it's not polished,
but that's our job,
to figure out what it is,
and I'm intrigued.
Go draw up the numbers
and let's see
if this thing has legs.
Uh, hang on.
Hang on. Hang on.
I'm I'm confused.
We all saw
the same pilot, right?
You really want to choose that
over something like
"The Advocates"?
I mean
Does this plot thicken?
Hunter, Hunter,
with the fire and the move,
do we really have the financial
flexibility to be wrong here?
The funny thing
about being wrong, Russ,
is that right up
until you realize it,
it feels exactly the same
as being right.
I don't think you're going to
regret this, Mr. Fox.
I'll also say
that Tilly's cooking
usually makes me sad
and fearful,
but that meal was divine.
I slept like a baby afterwards.
There's wine in the sauce, sir.
Now, that's true, Rodney,
but either way, I'm compelled.
So off we go.
These are the revised
weekend schedules.
Russ: Wait.
Don't go.
Here.
The numbers for your blessed
Croque Madame.
Okay, well
maybe they don't
need to be this high.
Really? Because we still need
to build a kitchen,
and even if it's
the cheapest kitchen in Boston,
that's still three-quarters
of our budget right there.
Well, what if we were
able to take
And we can't pay Julia,
let alone support staff.
Hell, with those numbers,
we can't even afford food.
You are trying to kill this.
It's not tenable.
I don't care what Tilly wants.
Hunter's a bottom-line guy, and
after you itemize these costs
Yes, but we are
looking for something
that audiences want to watch.
You heard Hunter.
People want to watch her.
I'm sorry,
but the numbers are the numbers.
I'll let Hunter know.
Fine, but you're the one
telling her.
She worked
incredibly hard, Russ.
Call her in and give her
an explanation.
La donna è mobile
qual piuma al vento ♪
Muta d'accento
e di pensiero ♪
Sempre un amabile ♪
Leggiadro viso,
in pianto o in riso ♪
Well, if they say "yes,"
the show could be for men, too.
It's for anyone
who likes to cook.
And eat, so, voilà.
Medium rare for you, Paul.
Hockey puck for Pop.
Thank you, dear.
But, uh, cooking on TV?
Is that a thing people do now?
Oh, it is, Pop.
It certainly is.
John, may I offer you some wine?
Ah, no.
Julia, bring me another beer.
We finished them with lunch.
Try Paul's red.
It goes very well with the meat.
What are they paying you
for this kind of thing?
Well, I'm not sure yet.
What's the business model
down there?
Do they even have a business
model for public television?
Well, that's a good question.
Who's talking upsides? I don't know.
Who's talking upsides? I don't know.
Well, what do you know?
John
All I know is that
they've called me in
for a meeting
with the producers.
Now, I'm hoping
that's a good sign.
Pop, I'm being very clear-eyed
about this.
To be honest, I had my doubts
about the whole thing.
But then they saw
what you can do.
C'est pourquoi ils ont appelé
avec cette bonne nouvelle.
Oh, well, I certainly hope so.
Mmm.
E di pensier ♪
E di pensier ♪
E ♪
Mm.
Pensier ♪
So she left Europe
to do a cooking show,
but, uh, what about you?
As we all know, John,
times change.
New administration, new rules.
The foreign service became
a young man's game.
Ah.
So, uh, what are you doing now?
Painting, Dad.
He's making art.
Ah.
Cambridge is a
Is a thriving town.
I'm finding plenty of ways
to keep busy.
Keep busy?
Most grown men I know
keep busy by working.
Well, we're certainly glad
you're still working, Pop.
It took this business trip
to finally get you
east of the Mississippi.
Don't remind me.
And can you admit
that you like the house?
Oh, I do.
It's beautiful.
A very solid house.
And good for the price.
Yes, we were very grateful
for the help.
I did notice, coming in,
the gutters on the south side,
they could use some tending to.
Well, okey-dokey.
Easy-peasy.
Paul, I know
you're keeping busy,
but would it be a violation
of your early retirement
and your delicate hands to tend
to the needs of your house?
Oh, you. Stop it.
Sweetie, you okay?
Julia, I
I wasted a '55 Bordeaux
on a man with no taste
or curiosity.
Let's just go to bed.
Well, you certainly
didn't waste it on me.
And after drinking
that extra glass,
I feel a little like
the farmer's daughter.
Randy and amorous.
I did not choose to retire.
He has no idea what happened
or how these things work.
And then to have to relive
the humiliation all over again
through those questions.
Delicate hands, Julia.
Really?
I practice judo twice a week.
These hands are lethal weapons!
Shh.
You can't take him seriously.
He has a sour word for everyone.
I've finally come to terms
with civilian life,
and and with what
this new phase means for us,
and he comes in
Your father just knows
how to make me feel very small
very fast.
Well, it's his gift.
He's just angry and
And old.
Yes.
When did that happen?
It's almost like overnight,
he's turned into this old man
he never used to be.
I'd love to be working.
You know that.
No, no.
Don't do that.
Don't undervalue what you do
and what we have.
If this meeting goes well
Of course it's going to go well.
This isn't the foreign service.
They don't call you in
to fire you.
Nothing's a done deal yet,
but if it does go well,
we'll be making
this show together,
and I wouldn't be able
to do it without you, Paul.
And I am going to work you
to the bone.
Mm.
Farmer's daughter, you said?
Farmer's daughter, you said?
Giddy up.
Mm.
But it's just a numbers game,
and at the end of the day,
the station can't afford it.
Oh, shit.
Yeah. We're sad.
Is this because of the pilot?
I know things got a bit lawless.
No, Julia, not at all.
Making television is chaotic.
We are all used to that.
And you should know that Hunter
is a big advocate of the show.
This decision is purely
a financial one.
Mm-hmm. We tried to wrestle
the numbers into submission,
but the the cold, hard truth
is that they don't add up.
The costs are too considerable.
Yeah.
How considerable?
Uh, I mean
Well, I could build you a set,
but then we'd have to worry
about covering food, and labor,
and
And it's a lot.
Mucho. Hmm?
Well, what's a lot?
Yeah.
I can do that.
Excuse me? Yes, I'll pay for it. Excuse me?
Yes, I'll pay for it.
I'll cover those costs.
Look, I-I know
you're disappointed
Oh, no, no.
No, I'm not disappointed.
This is actually exciting.
If money is our only concern,
I won't let it stand in our way.
Now Now, look
Julia, this is wonderful. No
Julia, this is wonderful. No
But you're you're sure?
Hmm?
Yes!
Let's do it.
John: And then
she fell down the stairs,
skinned both knees
Oh, my goodness.
And landed right at the feet
of Father Wilson
with her skirt over her head.
Yes, alright, Pop.
So yes, class clown indeed.
But always everyone's
favorite wingman.
Well, wingman no more.
Love, this time,
you're the pilot.
Of her pilot.
Uh, let me ask you something.
You're a reasonable,
reasonably attractive woman
of a certain age. Aren't you sweet?
of a certain age. Aren't you sweet?
Would you be prancing around
a kitchen set?
On a television?
Okay, okay.
No, no, I'm I'm proud of you.
It's just that I think
Julia is a natural performer.
If I had half her charm,
I could rule the world.
And speaking of charm,
who wants to make a toast?
Not you, John.
Oh, Paul, no.
And caviar is on the way.
It's just too extravagant,
honey.
Nonsense.
We're celebrating.
We certainly are.
And I would just like to say,
I have had many,
many doubts along the way.
But I was wrong
about the cookbook,
and I hope that I'm wrong
about this television program,
as well.
Darling?
Excuse me for a moment.
Oh.
Sweetie.
Your father's got
some very sharp claws.
Oh, please, he's been
giving those toasts
since I was in the crib.
I don't care about that.
What bothers me is that Paul
went full high gussy
and ordered
a $100 bottle of champagne.
We're celebrating. Yes, and caviar?
We're celebrating. Yes, and caviar?
Does he think we're
the damn Vanderbilts?
Julia!
I said yes.
I said yes, Avis, and
I don't know what I was thinking
or how I'm going to
pull this off,
and I barely looked
at the numbers, and I agreed,
and I said to my father
I wouldn't say yes to anything
without knowing what's entailed,
but he's right!
I'm an irresponsible clown
who doesn't think ahead
Slow down. Slow down.
What are you talking about?
Well, WGBH picked up the show,
but they can't afford
to produce it,
so if I want it made,
I have to figure out a way
to cover food and labor,
and then I have to do it
for 26 episodes.
And I have some of my own money,
but it's not enough,
and if I tell Paul
what's going on, he'll just
think I'm crazy, and I am crazy.
If they want the show,
they should pay,
but the problem is
Yes, I know what the problem is.
I want to do it.
I don't care if it is nuts
or a terrible business decision.
And I supposed I don't even care
that I'd be lying to my husband.
I want it
more than anything, Avis.
Alright then.
Let's do it.
I'm early. I know.
I was just too excited.
I couldn't stay home.
No, come in. Where's the baby? No, come in.
Where's the baby?
I thought I'd be seeing
that little bunny.
She's in the living room,
napping in her carriage,
and I hope she never wakes up.
Ha!
Oh, Dorothy!
Today. I hope
she never wakes up today.
My kingdom for a nanny.
This is Norman's
second time around,
so the baby's my project.
Don't let a middle-aged man
impregnate you.
There are strings.
Well, we're very happy
you're here,
and it's wonderful
of you to help.
You're happy?
When Avis called and said
that you were holding
cooking classes for extra cash,
I just about hit the ceiling.
These women are gonna
fall sideways for this,
Julia, really.
Oh, hello. I didn't realize
we were entertaining.
I thought I mentioned it.
Uh, you certainly didn't.
And, uh, I hate
to be rude, ladies
You? Rude?
But I'll I'll need you
to vacate for a little while.
I-I thought you were going
to WGBH today.
That's tomorrow. First, I need
to take measurements
to pass along
to the set builders.
We can't have that kitchen
we had last time.
Oh, right, of course.
It's just
Well, I have some women
coming over for a cooking class.
A cooking class?
Why on God's green Earth
would you be teaching now?
We need to be focused
on the show.
Dad!
There are ladies present.
Well, good. Can one of them
make me a cup of coffee?
Do you really have time
for this?
This This doesn't
make much sense to me.
Darling
Paul, the classes
are for publicity.
These women will be her base,
and the audience
is the most important ingredient
in a cooking show.
Oh, see what I did?
Ingredient.
I get it.
Keep your day job, Avis.
You'll have to do this
another time.
Uh We start in an hour,
Uh We start in an hour,
and there is a lot to prep.
Many a chocolate mousse
will be mixed on that stove,
and do you know what "desserts"
spelled backwards is?
"Stressed."
And we don't want that
for Julia, do we?
A lot of technique
and a little bit of magic
go a long way.
I simply loved
teaching in Paris,
so I can't tell you
how excited I am
to share the wonders
of la cuisine
Oh! I'm sorry,
my dear. I was
To share the wonders of la
cuisine française here at home.
Would you mind for a moment?
If you'd just take that.
Oh, not at all.
Just go right to
the edge of the stove.
Yeah. Perfect.
So, let's roll up our sleeves
and marshal our wits
and dive in.
Oh, very good.
Now we want to add more butter.
And remember, we want it cold.
Don't be shy.
There's more in the fridge.
One second.
Oh. Excuse me. Excuse me.
Sorry, sorry, I
No, I Okay!
Okay.
And a little sprinkle of flour.
Just use your paring knife
to cut along the outer edge
of the shrimp's back.
Just
Oh.
Golly.
That's perfect.
Now
I'm a Tiger, too.
Oh, I bet you are.
Pop?
Well, that was fun!
- WoDelicious.
- WoDelicious.
- Oh, cheers.
- Cheers.
- Cheers.
- Yes.
This is the mock-up
I'm giving to Russ.
Oh, that's lovely, sweetheart.
Don't you have to write
your outline for Russ tonight?
I just don't understand
why you're doing all this.
We need to get him
out of her hair.
He nodded off.
I have to get her home,
but tell Julia
it was so nice
having something to do again.
I will.
Since Rosie's been born,
my brain has been pudding.
But after today,
as crazy as it was,
I might go home tonight
and work on my dissertation.
Well, look at that.
Mwah.
Ah.
Thank you so much.
Thank you.
Thank you.
That was just like
arts and crafts.
Oh.
Thank you.
Do you think
shrimp is an aphrodisiac?
Mrs. Child?
Oh, it's Julia, dear, please.
Oh, uh, Julia.
Um, my name is Babe,
and, uh,
I just wanted to say, um,
my mother died
earlier this year,
and, um, I've been very low.
My husband hasn't known
how to, uh
Well, it's been hard.
But today was the first day
that I felt like my old self,
so thank you.
Oh, no, Babe.
Thank you.
That means so much to me.
Yeah. Well,
I can't wait to tell my friends
and watch the show.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Have a good one. Good night.
Have a good one. Good night.
Avis:
Well, we got through that.
We did.
I'll stay and clean.
Oh, no, no, no.
You You go.
You've done more than enough.
And take a bottle of wine
with you.
I'll just straighten up here
and get started
on the next episode.
Well, we made just enough,
if it's any consolation.
Was just enough, huh?
To the penny.
Then I'll need to do this
every week.
It looks that way.
Oh, alright, then.
At least we made Babe laugh.
There's that.
Yeah.
Who's Babe?
And then what's really
nice is that in Episode 6
This is all you have for me?
Is that not enough?
No, it's not enough.
You only submitted 12 recipes.
We need 26.
We're doing 26 episodes,
remember?
Okay, 26. Got it.
And they need to be organized.
I don't want a babble of recipes
with no methodology.
Russ?
These counters won't work.
They're too low
for Julia's height.
I gave specific measurements.
Talk to the guys
with the hammers.
This is the schedule.
This is what we have to do
every week.
Script three days
in advance on Mondays.
Run-through on Tuesday.
Food shopping and tech
rehearsals on Wednesdays.
We shoot Thursday.
Editing begins on Fridays.
Oh, my. Okay.
And you will need to think about
how the season is structured.
Structured? Like
Like which recipes come when.
Oh, structured.
Yes, of course.
I know what that is.
The The spacing isn't right
for the dishwasher.
That all has to shift over!
Our knowledge of television
is only two months old.
Between you and me,
we just got our first TV.
We're lucky to have you, Russ.
Yeah. Well
we'll see.
And uh, Russ, I think
we'll need another foot
between the island and the sink.
Like, I said, talk to
those guys over there.
I've got to get to the set
of "I've Been Reading."
Just wonderful.
Alright, you "guys over there,"
come here.
Come here. Come here.
Just These dimensions
are all wrong.
Just follow my lead.
Someone put a thumb right there.
Right there.
So, satisfy your inner scoundrel
and hie thee to the nearest
bookseller to purchase
"Whoresons and Pizzles: The Art
of the Shakespearean Insult."
Clarence, thank you so much
for joining us.
Thank you for having me, Albert.
Until next week,
dear friends and readers,
I am your host,
Professor Albert Duhamel.
Audentes fortuna iuvat.
- And we're out.
- And we're out.
Um, sorry, folks.
Don't mean to interrupt.
Albert, looking good up there.
Where's Morash?
I went over to "The French Chef"
to find you.
Love the set, by the way.
It'll be beautiful.
Well, I have to be here
for tapings.
Oh, no. No.
No, no, no, you don't.
I want to get Julia moving.
I don't need you here.
This show can run itself.
What did you just say?
It's a figure of speech, Albert.
But I'm confident
the legs over here are strong.
Well, you can't take Russ.
I'm sorry to spring this
on everyone,
but this is where we are.
Russ, you're with Julia.
Albert, uh, you'll get Richard
as your new producer.
Well, who in holy Christmas
is Richard?
He can't be my producer.
He's right. I can't.
I don't read.
Alright, uh, well
Alice?
Hm?
Do you read?
W-Wonderful. Uh, you can stay
and assist these fine gentlemen.
Hunter, we should
talk more about this.
Mm, my circus, my clowns.
Thanks for being
accommodating, folks.
Can't wait to see
what we come up with.
I will not be upstaged
by a quiche.
Uh, well, we won't
let that happen, Albert.
You think you have what it takes
to be my producer?
I will certainly try.
Splendid.
Get me Nabokov.
Roland: Yeah, Alice.
Get him Nabokov.
Who's Nabokov?
Sweetie.
Sweetie, don't be scared.
It's me. I'm using my key.
Mom, what are you doing here?
That key is
for emergencies only.
Now, I know you told me
you were busy tonight.
But there was a sale
at Filene's
That's an emergency
And I couldn't not
pick you up some bras,
because that one I saw
underneath your blouse
last week was so dingy.
Thank you.
And I can't have my child
in the streets looking raggedy.
And I also brought you
some leftovers.
And on my way here,
I ran into Henry Jones.
Hmm. Who is so nice. Hmm.
Who is so nice.
But did you know he sweats
out the top of his head
when he eats spicy food?
I don't need dinner.
I cooked.
Excuse me.
These hands made that quiche
from scratch.
Oh, someone thinks
she's doing something!
Can you make another one for the
church's toy drive on Sunday?
I can't Sunday. I have to work. Alice.
I can't Sunday. I have to work. Alice.
When Philip is at the office
all night,
you don't give him a hard time.
When Fred and Sam are busy,
you don't say boo to them.
That's because they're married.
I don't have to worry
about them.
You don't have to worry
about me.
Oh, yes, I do.
Have you been dating? No, Mom.
Have you been dating? No, Mom.
I've been reading.
Well, being up to your eyebrows
in Norman Mailer
is no way to spend your youth.
Okay.
That's all I'm gonna say.
No, it's not.
You need to be ready
and available for opportunities.
The Lord can't find
a parked car.
What does that even mean?
Excuse me. Steer.
I meant the Lord can't steer
a parked car.
You have to have
a full tank of gas
and be in drive,
ready for action.
Join Dottie's bowling team
with me.
Mom, I am trying to work on
some important things right now,
and it doesn't make me feel good
when you say
that my life is meaningless
just because I'm single.
Ah, ah, uh, okay.
Okay.
Oh, uh, come on.
Honey.
I just
want you happy, tootsie.
Is there anything
Daddy and I can do
to help with the workload?
That depends. Do either of you
know Philip Roth?
No. But I do know Harold Roth
from the pharmacy,
and his son
just got back from Brown,
and Harold said he'd love
to make an introduction.
Unbelievable.
Oh, come on.
Sauté the bacon in oil.
- Julia.
- Julia.
Dry the beef in paper towels.
Sweetheart.
Oh, I'm sorry.
My head's a scrambled egg.
Russ is He's a tough teacher,
I'm realizing.
Mm.
Um, you know how we say,
"He who loves the rose
must respect the thorn"?
Mm.
I think I have
the best possible news
at the worst possible time.
I got a call from, uh, Antoine?
You know him?
His His gallery's underneath
my my judo dojo?
Yes, okay.
Well, it looks like
one of his artists
fell through
for an upcoming show.
Oh, Paul.
And he wondered
if I might want
to have a showing of my work.
Oh, my goodness!
I know.
It's It's terrible timing
with your show getting started,
and I worry I-I'd be leaving
when you're underwater
with all this work and and
your silly cooking classes
Oh, don't be a lunatic.
This is wonderful news.
Are you sure?
I If I did do it, I promise
I-I wouldn't take my eye
off the ball with you.
Paul, your art must be
your priority now.
Okay.
You can call that Antoine
and tell him oui.
A thousand times oui.
Okay.
Oh.
Oh, Pop, I'm sorry.
Did I wake you?
No, no.
I haven't been sleeping
so well lately.
"A difference
between"
"In your mouth."
"In your mouth."
"Of the oven."
Mm.
Here's to those
who wish us well.
And those who don't
can go to hell.
Ahh.
So this is the TV show?
Yeah, hopefully.
Making a single episode
is one thing,
but an entire season?
I feel like I don't know
what the heck I'm doing.
Well, never mind with all
that head-clutching nonsense.
You put one foot
in front of the other.
How did you grandfather open
his first bank in Illinois?
Brick by brick.
And how did I build
the ranch house in Montecito?
Board by board.
Alright, then.
There you go.
Cup by cup, Julia.
Hm.
What the hell is that word?
Boeuf.
Boeuf.
It means beef.
Well, why don't
they just say that?
But then first
I found myself wondering,
should we prepare
the bacon ahead of time?
Or since we have the sink,
should I simmer the rind
and bacon on-camera?
Oh! Heavens.
It works.
Indeed, it does.
So many details.
It's marvelous how
the pieces come together.
Makes me so excited
for what we can do,
and I can't wait to share my
little tricks and trade secrets.
And I was thinking,
I can show Americans
how to clean mushrooms,
which they don't know how to do.
And that would be good
in Episode 13,
when we do veal scallops
in mushroom sauce.
And this episode,
oh, Russ, you
Russ?
Yeah?
What is it?
I was just wondering
if you liked that idea.
Of me removing the bacon rind
before boiling the water?
Uh-huh.
- Well?
- Well?
I-I haven't heard
from anyone yet.
I thought you were my producer.
I am, Albert,
and I can call people,
but I can't make them
call me back.
And it might be
a little difficult
to secure an interview
with Nabokov
now that he's moved
to Switzerland.
Have you seen Julia's set?
With that sink?
I could get you
some more f-ferns.
She gets running water,
and I'm stuck with Roland!
There's nothing behind the eyes.
Well, you still have me.
Unbelievable.
Bobby Odell's directing a play.
Oh, gosh.
I haven't heard that name
in a long time.
Yeah.
What's the play?
It doesn't matter.
He's a hack.
Bobby was, what,
three years below me at B.U.?
And now he's doing
all this work?
It's a sign.
It has to be.
I need to quit my job.
Oh. I see.
Because here's the thing,
honey
I'm dying at the station.
I can't get anything I want
off the ground.
And I know being an artist,
truly pursuing it,
is a sacrifice,
but this is the time
to give directing a real shot,
because otherwise, Julia?
This can't be my life.
I need more.
Good.
I-I have more for you.
I'm pregnant.
Dr. Jenkins called
this afternoon.
I know that work is hard,
but, I don't know,
maybe it'll be easier when
you have a little bundle of joy
to come home to, crying
and screaming and pooping
and keeping you up all night.
We're having a baby?
Yeah. We are.
So can you hang in there?
And, I don't know,
maybe give me a hug?
Come here. Come here.
Of course. Come here.
Come here.
Come here. Of course.
Of course.
Mm!
Thank you.
Well, you're going to heaven.
When my father stayed with us,
I went right out
of my fucking mind.
Oh, Dad likes you. Oh.
Oh, Dad likes you. Oh.
Wanted you to come to lunch
with us today.
I was grocery shopping
with Dorothy.
You're all set with
boeuf bourguignon for this week
and for class on Sunday.
Oh, great.
Uh-huh.
Your troops are on it.
Yes, well, your general is not.
Oh, Avis, I don't know
if I can do all this.
You can.
Your next script's not due
until Monday.
When do I write it?
Saturday.
Well, when do I sleep?
Oh. Well,
at least you don't have Paul
underfoot this weekend.
How are he and Antoine
getting along?
Oh, Avis DeVoto!
Antoine Lawrence
is a very old friend
with very good taste
who owes me a favor.
Oh, my goodness.
I'm a terrible person.
First lying to my husband
about my show
and then lying to him again
about his show.
Oh
Don't pick that up.
And don't beat yourself up.
Antoine loved Paul's work.
He was happy
to give him a chance.
You see, I want
to do all this, I do,
but I may be at the end
of my rope.
And the teaching
is just too much.
And there's a limit to what
I can ask of you and Dorothy.
We're happy to do it.
But Dorothy needs a babysitter.
I feel like
I'm taking advantage.
And Antoine, good taste
notwithstanding,
I'm still lying to my husband.
Whether you tell Paul or not,
you still need the money,
and he's far too proud to let
you foot the bill yourself.
So in this case, my dear,
the truth will not set you free.
Are you sure?
My advice is, stop this
yakky yak and enjoy the ride.
And finish what's left
of your butter pecan.
Leave it to you to find
the one ice cream
actually made with butter.
And you're the one
eating rocky road,
which may be prescient.
Paulski,
can I borrow your brain
for just a moment
and ask for help?
What do you think
of these edits?
I need to get the changes
to Russ for the tech rehearsal.
Well, I'm all yours
if you'll help me figure out
how to arrange these pieces.
I'm trying to tell a story,
but I don't think
I've cracked it yet.
Oh.
Right-o.
Running water.
What the fuck?
That's exactly what I said.
You two.
Ladies.
Sergeant Morash.
Sergeant Morash.
Alright, alright, alright.
Let's get started.
Okay, everybody.
First positions for rehearsal!
Let's get ready
to, uh, get ready.
Okay, Julia, let's start
with the pot on the burner
and take it off the heat,
remove the lid, give a taste,
and then put it in the top oven.
Jim, can you bring
your camera in here?
Avis and Dorothy, why don't we
keep you behind the counter
until she goes to the oven? Got it.
until she goes to the oven? Got it.
Julia.
I like those recipes
you submitted.
Oh, good.
A thought
Instead of structuring
the season like a meal,
appetizers followed
by entrees then desserts,
let's toggle between courses
so we don't have
five soup episodes in a row.
Oh, that's stupendous
thinking, Russ.
Avis, you have those onions?
Yes.
Peeled and unpeeled
and
cooked.
Great.
Now, Julia, I need you here
but looking into camera 2
as you cut through
the slices of beef.
And, Avis, you can trick out
the cooked onions
as the camera's tight on Julia.
Like magic.
Exactly.
So, I-I was thinking
What is it?
Which camera is which?
That was the problem I had
during the damned pilot.
Yes, it was,
so let's make this
a little more clear for you.
I stole these from the set
of "Karate Kats."
Maybe they'll help? Oh, yes!
Maybe they'll help? Oh, yes!
Friends!
Little friends to talk to.
This is Binky.
Binky.
He'll be your friend until
you go for that cutting board.
After that, you'll be
with Boochie.
Boochie. He'll be your main man Boochie.
He'll be your main man
until you start
on the mushrooms.
Oh, Russ, I have
so much to learn.
Yes, you do.
But that's what rehearsal's for.
Oh, holy Moses,
I'm going to get this.
Alright, folks, let's take it
from the top
and give it a go with food.
No, I Before
Before we begin,
I just want to thank you all
for taking this ride with me.
To have this opportunity
at my age is
Everyone's working so hard.
I can't believe how lucky I am.
I'm going to swing for the
fences on every single show,
and regardless of what happens,
at least there will always
be leftovers.
Yeah.
Albert: Alice! My fern!
May I?
Please.
Ah.
So that's how you paint
a pomegranate.
How much would someone pay
for something like that?
Well, I tend to
leave the business concerns
to other people.
Ah.
The art and the expression,
they're the
They're what get my attention.
I got to tell you, Paul, words
like "art" and "expression"
send me right to the crapper.
It's funny. I didn't think
you could turn a hobby
into a career at your age.
But then, what do I know?
I didn't get into it
for the money.
Of course you didn't.
Well, I suppose every man
must have his arena.
Evidently, this is yours.
Is there anything else
I can help you with, John?
Uh, no. No,
I'm driving into Boston
to meet with an associate.
I should get moving. Take me
five hours to find parking.
I know what you're thinking.
I know what you mean,
and it's not true.
What am I thinking, Paul?
That I married Julia
for her money.
Why else?
How sad that you can't see
what I see.
Well?
Julia, it looks wonderful.
Oh, Alice, come see.
It works!
Oh, I've heard all about
the running water from Albert.
Oh, is that where you've been.
With Duke?
I've missed you.
We've all missed you.
Paul was ready to send out
the search brigade.
I was pulled off your show.
Yes, I know.
I heard.
I have found that I've had
the most success
when I've figured out
how to make myself
absolutely necessary
and indispensable.
For such a talent as you,
dear Alice,
I can't imagine that being
too difficult.
Oh.
Ham and pickle,
no crust, no mustard.
Thank you, dear.
You okay, Big John?
Oh, yeah. I'm fine.
Um, I was gonna drop this
in the mail,
but, uh, now I can save
a stamp this month.
Well, thanks, Pop.
You sure you can't stay?
You'd get to watch the show
being taped.
You'd be my very first
live audience.
No, I'm sorry.
I really need to get down
to my meetings in New York.
Business is business.
Well, you should know
all about that by now,
what with everything
you've got on your plate.
Yes, I feel like you and Gramps,
taking big risks and
this leap of faith.
You're your
father's daughter now, are you?
I am.
Let's not let another year
go by.
I'm going to be sad when you go.
It's been such a nice visit.
It certainly was.
Phila and I will look forward
to your next trip out west.
And if you wanted to come alone,
that would be even better.
Dad?
Yeah?
Oh, it's nothing.
Can I give you a hand?
I'm alright.
Why won't you let me help you?
We're all here to help.
Julia.
Be a lady?
Be a lady.
I am a lady, Dad.
Just not your type.
And that's okay.
You always gave me
everything I needed,
and I love you for that.
Well, good.
And I need one more thing.
Like Jayne Mansfield.
Oh!
Isn't she a Playboy bunny?
It's never too late, love.
I agree. Beautiful.
Thank you.
Maybe on Sunday
we can celebrate
with some champagne on the pier.
We have class on Sunday.
No, we don't.
I've found a way
to cover expenses for the show.
And I'm paying for a babysitter.
Oh, I couldn't.
Oh, you can, and you shall.
WoJulia, we need you.
Alright, crazy kids,
let's give this a try!
Everybody in positions, please.
One moment, please.
Very nervous.
Don't be nervous, darling,
whatever happens.
Thank you.
Mm-hmm.
Here we go with Episode 1.
Talk to Binky. Talk to Binky.
Talk to Binky.
And quiet on set, please!
We're ready in 5, 4, 3
Welcome to "The French Chef."
Welcome to "The French Chef."
I'm Julia Child.
Things look swell,
things look great ♪
Gonna have the whole world
on a plate ♪
Starting here, starting now ♪
Honey, everything's
comin' up roses ♪
Clear the decks,
clear the tracks ♪
We got nothing to do
but relax ♪
Blow a kiss, take a bow ♪
Honey, everything's
comin' up roses ♪
Now's our inning ♪
Stand the world on its ear ♪
Set it spinning ♪
That'll be
just the beginning ♪
Curtain up, light the lights ♪
We got nothin' to hit
but the heights ♪
We'll be swell,
we'll be great ♪
I can tell, just you wait ♪
That lucky star I talk about
is due ♪
Honey, everything's
coming up roses ♪
For me and for you ♪
There you go.
First floor,
right off the staircase.
Has anyone seen my stapler?
Okay. Uh,
"State House Rules."
Where are we?
Doing great.
We got a nice lineup.
Did you get the mayor?
Not yet, but we're
working on it.
I want the mayor, Roger.
Make it happen.
Make me happy.
I'm Roland.
That's what I Yes, alright.
I think that's all,
friends and neighbors.
Whoa! Whoa.
Uh, synaptic misfire.
Almost forgot
the most important thing.
Where are we with
"The French Chef"?
It's been three days.
Oh.
Um
Right.
Look, yeah.
I know.
What do you know?
The show.
She's not a professional.
Uh-huh.
I mean, "A" for effort, right?
At least it didn't
cost us too much.
I liked it.
You did?
I did.
He liked it.
And Tilly loved it.
She made the coq au vin
Is that
how you say it? It sounds dirty.
But she hasn't been able
to stop talking
about Julia Child
with her friends.
Hunter Now, it's not polished,
Hunter Now, it's not polished,
but that's our job,
to figure out what it is,
and I'm intrigued.
Go draw up the numbers
and let's see
if this thing has legs.
Uh, hang on.
Hang on. Hang on.
I'm I'm confused.
We all saw
the same pilot, right?
You really want to choose that
over something like
"The Advocates"?
I mean
Does this plot thicken?
Hunter, Hunter,
with the fire and the move,
do we really have the financial
flexibility to be wrong here?
The funny thing
about being wrong, Russ,
is that right up
until you realize it,
it feels exactly the same
as being right.
I don't think you're going to
regret this, Mr. Fox.
I'll also say
that Tilly's cooking
usually makes me sad
and fearful,
but that meal was divine.
I slept like a baby afterwards.
There's wine in the sauce, sir.
Now, that's true, Rodney,
but either way, I'm compelled.
So off we go.
These are the revised
weekend schedules.
Russ: Wait.
Don't go.
Here.
The numbers for your blessed
Croque Madame.
Okay, well
maybe they don't
need to be this high.
Really? Because we still need
to build a kitchen,
and even if it's
the cheapest kitchen in Boston,
that's still three-quarters
of our budget right there.
Well, what if we were
able to take
And we can't pay Julia,
let alone support staff.
Hell, with those numbers,
we can't even afford food.
You are trying to kill this.
It's not tenable.
I don't care what Tilly wants.
Hunter's a bottom-line guy, and
after you itemize these costs
Yes, but we are
looking for something
that audiences want to watch.
You heard Hunter.
People want to watch her.
I'm sorry,
but the numbers are the numbers.
I'll let Hunter know.
Fine, but you're the one
telling her.
She worked
incredibly hard, Russ.
Call her in and give her
an explanation.
La donna è mobile
qual piuma al vento ♪
Muta d'accento
e di pensiero ♪
Sempre un amabile ♪
Leggiadro viso,
in pianto o in riso ♪
Well, if they say "yes,"
the show could be for men, too.
It's for anyone
who likes to cook.
And eat, so, voilà.
Medium rare for you, Paul.
Hockey puck for Pop.
Thank you, dear.
But, uh, cooking on TV?
Is that a thing people do now?
Oh, it is, Pop.
It certainly is.
John, may I offer you some wine?
Ah, no.
Julia, bring me another beer.
We finished them with lunch.
Try Paul's red.
It goes very well with the meat.
What are they paying you
for this kind of thing?
Well, I'm not sure yet.
What's the business model
down there?
Do they even have a business
model for public television?
Well, that's a good question.
Who's talking upsides? I don't know.
Who's talking upsides? I don't know.
Well, what do you know?
John
All I know is that
they've called me in
for a meeting
with the producers.
Now, I'm hoping
that's a good sign.
Pop, I'm being very clear-eyed
about this.
To be honest, I had my doubts
about the whole thing.
But then they saw
what you can do.
C'est pourquoi ils ont appelé
avec cette bonne nouvelle.
Oh, well, I certainly hope so.
Mmm.
E di pensier ♪
E di pensier ♪
E ♪
Mm.
Pensier ♪
So she left Europe
to do a cooking show,
but, uh, what about you?
As we all know, John,
times change.
New administration, new rules.
The foreign service became
a young man's game.
Ah.
So, uh, what are you doing now?
Painting, Dad.
He's making art.
Ah.
Cambridge is a
Is a thriving town.
I'm finding plenty of ways
to keep busy.
Keep busy?
Most grown men I know
keep busy by working.
Well, we're certainly glad
you're still working, Pop.
It took this business trip
to finally get you
east of the Mississippi.
Don't remind me.
And can you admit
that you like the house?
Oh, I do.
It's beautiful.
A very solid house.
And good for the price.
Yes, we were very grateful
for the help.
I did notice, coming in,
the gutters on the south side,
they could use some tending to.
Well, okey-dokey.
Easy-peasy.
Paul, I know
you're keeping busy,
but would it be a violation
of your early retirement
and your delicate hands to tend
to the needs of your house?
Oh, you. Stop it.
Sweetie, you okay?
Julia, I
I wasted a '55 Bordeaux
on a man with no taste
or curiosity.
Let's just go to bed.
Well, you certainly
didn't waste it on me.
And after drinking
that extra glass,
I feel a little like
the farmer's daughter.
Randy and amorous.
I did not choose to retire.
He has no idea what happened
or how these things work.
And then to have to relive
the humiliation all over again
through those questions.
Delicate hands, Julia.
Really?
I practice judo twice a week.
These hands are lethal weapons!
Shh.
You can't take him seriously.
He has a sour word for everyone.
I've finally come to terms
with civilian life,
and and with what
this new phase means for us,
and he comes in
Your father just knows
how to make me feel very small
very fast.
Well, it's his gift.
He's just angry and
And old.
Yes.
When did that happen?
It's almost like overnight,
he's turned into this old man
he never used to be.
I'd love to be working.
You know that.
No, no.
Don't do that.
Don't undervalue what you do
and what we have.
If this meeting goes well
Of course it's going to go well.
This isn't the foreign service.
They don't call you in
to fire you.
Nothing's a done deal yet,
but if it does go well,
we'll be making
this show together,
and I wouldn't be able
to do it without you, Paul.
And I am going to work you
to the bone.
Mm.
Farmer's daughter, you said?
Farmer's daughter, you said?
Giddy up.
Mm.
But it's just a numbers game,
and at the end of the day,
the station can't afford it.
Oh, shit.
Yeah. We're sad.
Is this because of the pilot?
I know things got a bit lawless.
No, Julia, not at all.
Making television is chaotic.
We are all used to that.
And you should know that Hunter
is a big advocate of the show.
This decision is purely
a financial one.
Mm-hmm. We tried to wrestle
the numbers into submission,
but the the cold, hard truth
is that they don't add up.
The costs are too considerable.
Yeah.
How considerable?
Uh, I mean
Well, I could build you a set,
but then we'd have to worry
about covering food, and labor,
and
And it's a lot.
Mucho. Hmm?
Well, what's a lot?
Yeah.
I can do that.
Excuse me? Yes, I'll pay for it. Excuse me?
Yes, I'll pay for it.
I'll cover those costs.
Look, I-I know
you're disappointed
Oh, no, no.
No, I'm not disappointed.
This is actually exciting.
If money is our only concern,
I won't let it stand in our way.
Now Now, look
Julia, this is wonderful. No
Julia, this is wonderful. No
But you're you're sure?
Hmm?
Yes!
Let's do it.
John: And then
she fell down the stairs,
skinned both knees
Oh, my goodness.
And landed right at the feet
of Father Wilson
with her skirt over her head.
Yes, alright, Pop.
So yes, class clown indeed.
But always everyone's
favorite wingman.
Well, wingman no more.
Love, this time,
you're the pilot.
Of her pilot.
Uh, let me ask you something.
You're a reasonable,
reasonably attractive woman
of a certain age. Aren't you sweet?
of a certain age. Aren't you sweet?
Would you be prancing around
a kitchen set?
On a television?
Okay, okay.
No, no, I'm I'm proud of you.
It's just that I think
Julia is a natural performer.
If I had half her charm,
I could rule the world.
And speaking of charm,
who wants to make a toast?
Not you, John.
Oh, Paul, no.
And caviar is on the way.
It's just too extravagant,
honey.
Nonsense.
We're celebrating.
We certainly are.
And I would just like to say,
I have had many,
many doubts along the way.
But I was wrong
about the cookbook,
and I hope that I'm wrong
about this television program,
as well.
Darling?
Excuse me for a moment.
Oh.
Sweetie.
Your father's got
some very sharp claws.
Oh, please, he's been
giving those toasts
since I was in the crib.
I don't care about that.
What bothers me is that Paul
went full high gussy
and ordered
a $100 bottle of champagne.
We're celebrating. Yes, and caviar?
We're celebrating. Yes, and caviar?
Does he think we're
the damn Vanderbilts?
Julia!
I said yes.
I said yes, Avis, and
I don't know what I was thinking
or how I'm going to
pull this off,
and I barely looked
at the numbers, and I agreed,
and I said to my father
I wouldn't say yes to anything
without knowing what's entailed,
but he's right!
I'm an irresponsible clown
who doesn't think ahead
Slow down. Slow down.
What are you talking about?
Well, WGBH picked up the show,
but they can't afford
to produce it,
so if I want it made,
I have to figure out a way
to cover food and labor,
and then I have to do it
for 26 episodes.
And I have some of my own money,
but it's not enough,
and if I tell Paul
what's going on, he'll just
think I'm crazy, and I am crazy.
If they want the show,
they should pay,
but the problem is
Yes, I know what the problem is.
I want to do it.
I don't care if it is nuts
or a terrible business decision.
And I supposed I don't even care
that I'd be lying to my husband.
I want it
more than anything, Avis.
Alright then.
Let's do it.
I'm early. I know.
I was just too excited.
I couldn't stay home.
No, come in. Where's the baby? No, come in.
Where's the baby?
I thought I'd be seeing
that little bunny.
She's in the living room,
napping in her carriage,
and I hope she never wakes up.
Ha!
Oh, Dorothy!
Today. I hope
she never wakes up today.
My kingdom for a nanny.
This is Norman's
second time around,
so the baby's my project.
Don't let a middle-aged man
impregnate you.
There are strings.
Well, we're very happy
you're here,
and it's wonderful
of you to help.
You're happy?
When Avis called and said
that you were holding
cooking classes for extra cash,
I just about hit the ceiling.
These women are gonna
fall sideways for this,
Julia, really.
Oh, hello. I didn't realize
we were entertaining.
I thought I mentioned it.
Uh, you certainly didn't.
And, uh, I hate
to be rude, ladies
You? Rude?
But I'll I'll need you
to vacate for a little while.
I-I thought you were going
to WGBH today.
That's tomorrow. First, I need
to take measurements
to pass along
to the set builders.
We can't have that kitchen
we had last time.
Oh, right, of course.
It's just
Well, I have some women
coming over for a cooking class.
A cooking class?
Why on God's green Earth
would you be teaching now?
We need to be focused
on the show.
Dad!
There are ladies present.
Well, good. Can one of them
make me a cup of coffee?
Do you really have time
for this?
This This doesn't
make much sense to me.
Darling
Paul, the classes
are for publicity.
These women will be her base,
and the audience
is the most important ingredient
in a cooking show.
Oh, see what I did?
Ingredient.
I get it.
Keep your day job, Avis.
You'll have to do this
another time.
Uh We start in an hour,
Uh We start in an hour,
and there is a lot to prep.
Many a chocolate mousse
will be mixed on that stove,
and do you know what "desserts"
spelled backwards is?
"Stressed."
And we don't want that
for Julia, do we?
A lot of technique
and a little bit of magic
go a long way.
I simply loved
teaching in Paris,
so I can't tell you
how excited I am
to share the wonders
of la cuisine
Oh! I'm sorry,
my dear. I was
To share the wonders of la
cuisine française here at home.
Would you mind for a moment?
If you'd just take that.
Oh, not at all.
Just go right to
the edge of the stove.
Yeah. Perfect.
So, let's roll up our sleeves
and marshal our wits
and dive in.
Oh, very good.
Now we want to add more butter.
And remember, we want it cold.
Don't be shy.
There's more in the fridge.
One second.
Oh. Excuse me. Excuse me.
Sorry, sorry, I
No, I Okay!
Okay.
And a little sprinkle of flour.
Just use your paring knife
to cut along the outer edge
of the shrimp's back.
Just
Oh.
Golly.
That's perfect.
Now
I'm a Tiger, too.
Oh, I bet you are.
Pop?
Well, that was fun!
- WoDelicious.
- WoDelicious.
- Oh, cheers.
- Cheers.
- Cheers.
- Yes.
This is the mock-up
I'm giving to Russ.
Oh, that's lovely, sweetheart.
Don't you have to write
your outline for Russ tonight?
I just don't understand
why you're doing all this.
We need to get him
out of her hair.
He nodded off.
I have to get her home,
but tell Julia
it was so nice
having something to do again.
I will.
Since Rosie's been born,
my brain has been pudding.
But after today,
as crazy as it was,
I might go home tonight
and work on my dissertation.
Well, look at that.
Mwah.
Ah.
Thank you so much.
Thank you.
Thank you.
That was just like
arts and crafts.
Oh.
Thank you.
Do you think
shrimp is an aphrodisiac?
Mrs. Child?
Oh, it's Julia, dear, please.
Oh, uh, Julia.
Um, my name is Babe,
and, uh,
I just wanted to say, um,
my mother died
earlier this year,
and, um, I've been very low.
My husband hasn't known
how to, uh
Well, it's been hard.
But today was the first day
that I felt like my old self,
so thank you.
Oh, no, Babe.
Thank you.
That means so much to me.
Yeah. Well,
I can't wait to tell my friends
and watch the show.
Thank you.
Thank you.
Have a good one. Good night.
Have a good one. Good night.
Avis:
Well, we got through that.
We did.
I'll stay and clean.
Oh, no, no, no.
You You go.
You've done more than enough.
And take a bottle of wine
with you.
I'll just straighten up here
and get started
on the next episode.
Well, we made just enough,
if it's any consolation.
Was just enough, huh?
To the penny.
Then I'll need to do this
every week.
It looks that way.
Oh, alright, then.
At least we made Babe laugh.
There's that.
Yeah.
Who's Babe?
And then what's really
nice is that in Episode 6
This is all you have for me?
Is that not enough?
No, it's not enough.
You only submitted 12 recipes.
We need 26.
We're doing 26 episodes,
remember?
Okay, 26. Got it.
And they need to be organized.
I don't want a babble of recipes
with no methodology.
Russ?
These counters won't work.
They're too low
for Julia's height.
I gave specific measurements.
Talk to the guys
with the hammers.
This is the schedule.
This is what we have to do
every week.
Script three days
in advance on Mondays.
Run-through on Tuesday.
Food shopping and tech
rehearsals on Wednesdays.
We shoot Thursday.
Editing begins on Fridays.
Oh, my. Okay.
And you will need to think about
how the season is structured.
Structured? Like
Like which recipes come when.
Oh, structured.
Yes, of course.
I know what that is.
The The spacing isn't right
for the dishwasher.
That all has to shift over!
Our knowledge of television
is only two months old.
Between you and me,
we just got our first TV.
We're lucky to have you, Russ.
Yeah. Well
we'll see.
And uh, Russ, I think
we'll need another foot
between the island and the sink.
Like, I said, talk to
those guys over there.
I've got to get to the set
of "I've Been Reading."
Just wonderful.
Alright, you "guys over there,"
come here.
Come here. Come here.
Just These dimensions
are all wrong.
Just follow my lead.
Someone put a thumb right there.
Right there.
So, satisfy your inner scoundrel
and hie thee to the nearest
bookseller to purchase
"Whoresons and Pizzles: The Art
of the Shakespearean Insult."
Clarence, thank you so much
for joining us.
Thank you for having me, Albert.
Until next week,
dear friends and readers,
I am your host,
Professor Albert Duhamel.
Audentes fortuna iuvat.
- And we're out.
- And we're out.
Um, sorry, folks.
Don't mean to interrupt.
Albert, looking good up there.
Where's Morash?
I went over to "The French Chef"
to find you.
Love the set, by the way.
It'll be beautiful.
Well, I have to be here
for tapings.
Oh, no. No.
No, no, no, you don't.
I want to get Julia moving.
I don't need you here.
This show can run itself.
What did you just say?
It's a figure of speech, Albert.
But I'm confident
the legs over here are strong.
Well, you can't take Russ.
I'm sorry to spring this
on everyone,
but this is where we are.
Russ, you're with Julia.
Albert, uh, you'll get Richard
as your new producer.
Well, who in holy Christmas
is Richard?
He can't be my producer.
He's right. I can't.
I don't read.
Alright, uh, well
Alice?
Hm?
Do you read?
W-Wonderful. Uh, you can stay
and assist these fine gentlemen.
Hunter, we should
talk more about this.
Mm, my circus, my clowns.
Thanks for being
accommodating, folks.
Can't wait to see
what we come up with.
I will not be upstaged
by a quiche.
Uh, well, we won't
let that happen, Albert.
You think you have what it takes
to be my producer?
I will certainly try.
Splendid.
Get me Nabokov.
Roland: Yeah, Alice.
Get him Nabokov.
Who's Nabokov?
Sweetie.
Sweetie, don't be scared.
It's me. I'm using my key.
Mom, what are you doing here?
That key is
for emergencies only.
Now, I know you told me
you were busy tonight.
But there was a sale
at Filene's
That's an emergency
And I couldn't not
pick you up some bras,
because that one I saw
underneath your blouse
last week was so dingy.
Thank you.
And I can't have my child
in the streets looking raggedy.
And I also brought you
some leftovers.
And on my way here,
I ran into Henry Jones.
Hmm. Who is so nice. Hmm.
Who is so nice.
But did you know he sweats
out the top of his head
when he eats spicy food?
I don't need dinner.
I cooked.
Excuse me.
These hands made that quiche
from scratch.
Oh, someone thinks
she's doing something!
Can you make another one for the
church's toy drive on Sunday?
I can't Sunday. I have to work. Alice.
I can't Sunday. I have to work. Alice.
When Philip is at the office
all night,
you don't give him a hard time.
When Fred and Sam are busy,
you don't say boo to them.
That's because they're married.
I don't have to worry
about them.
You don't have to worry
about me.
Oh, yes, I do.
Have you been dating? No, Mom.
Have you been dating? No, Mom.
I've been reading.
Well, being up to your eyebrows
in Norman Mailer
is no way to spend your youth.
Okay.
That's all I'm gonna say.
No, it's not.
You need to be ready
and available for opportunities.
The Lord can't find
a parked car.
What does that even mean?
Excuse me. Steer.
I meant the Lord can't steer
a parked car.
You have to have
a full tank of gas
and be in drive,
ready for action.
Join Dottie's bowling team
with me.
Mom, I am trying to work on
some important things right now,
and it doesn't make me feel good
when you say
that my life is meaningless
just because I'm single.
Ah, ah, uh, okay.
Okay.
Oh, uh, come on.
Honey.
I just
want you happy, tootsie.
Is there anything
Daddy and I can do
to help with the workload?
That depends. Do either of you
know Philip Roth?
No. But I do know Harold Roth
from the pharmacy,
and his son
just got back from Brown,
and Harold said he'd love
to make an introduction.
Unbelievable.
Oh, come on.
Sauté the bacon in oil.
- Julia.
- Julia.
Dry the beef in paper towels.
Sweetheart.
Oh, I'm sorry.
My head's a scrambled egg.
Russ is He's a tough teacher,
I'm realizing.
Mm.
Um, you know how we say,
"He who loves the rose
must respect the thorn"?
Mm.
I think I have
the best possible news
at the worst possible time.
I got a call from, uh, Antoine?
You know him?
His His gallery's underneath
my my judo dojo?
Yes, okay.
Well, it looks like
one of his artists
fell through
for an upcoming show.
Oh, Paul.
And he wondered
if I might want
to have a showing of my work.
Oh, my goodness!
I know.
It's It's terrible timing
with your show getting started,
and I worry I-I'd be leaving
when you're underwater
with all this work and and
your silly cooking classes
Oh, don't be a lunatic.
This is wonderful news.
Are you sure?
I If I did do it, I promise
I-I wouldn't take my eye
off the ball with you.
Paul, your art must be
your priority now.
Okay.
You can call that Antoine
and tell him oui.
A thousand times oui.
Okay.
Oh.
Oh, Pop, I'm sorry.
Did I wake you?
No, no.
I haven't been sleeping
so well lately.
"A difference
between"
"In your mouth."
"In your mouth."
"Of the oven."
Mm.
Here's to those
who wish us well.
And those who don't
can go to hell.
Ahh.
So this is the TV show?
Yeah, hopefully.
Making a single episode
is one thing,
but an entire season?
I feel like I don't know
what the heck I'm doing.
Well, never mind with all
that head-clutching nonsense.
You put one foot
in front of the other.
How did you grandfather open
his first bank in Illinois?
Brick by brick.
And how did I build
the ranch house in Montecito?
Board by board.
Alright, then.
There you go.
Cup by cup, Julia.
Hm.
What the hell is that word?
Boeuf.
Boeuf.
It means beef.
Well, why don't
they just say that?
But then first
I found myself wondering,
should we prepare
the bacon ahead of time?
Or since we have the sink,
should I simmer the rind
and bacon on-camera?
Oh! Heavens.
It works.
Indeed, it does.
So many details.
It's marvelous how
the pieces come together.
Makes me so excited
for what we can do,
and I can't wait to share my
little tricks and trade secrets.
And I was thinking,
I can show Americans
how to clean mushrooms,
which they don't know how to do.
And that would be good
in Episode 13,
when we do veal scallops
in mushroom sauce.
And this episode,
oh, Russ, you
Russ?
Yeah?
What is it?
I was just wondering
if you liked that idea.
Of me removing the bacon rind
before boiling the water?
Uh-huh.
- Well?
- Well?
I-I haven't heard
from anyone yet.
I thought you were my producer.
I am, Albert,
and I can call people,
but I can't make them
call me back.
And it might be
a little difficult
to secure an interview
with Nabokov
now that he's moved
to Switzerland.
Have you seen Julia's set?
With that sink?
I could get you
some more f-ferns.
She gets running water,
and I'm stuck with Roland!
There's nothing behind the eyes.
Well, you still have me.
Unbelievable.
Bobby Odell's directing a play.
Oh, gosh.
I haven't heard that name
in a long time.
Yeah.
What's the play?
It doesn't matter.
He's a hack.
Bobby was, what,
three years below me at B.U.?
And now he's doing
all this work?
It's a sign.
It has to be.
I need to quit my job.
Oh. I see.
Because here's the thing,
honey
I'm dying at the station.
I can't get anything I want
off the ground.
And I know being an artist,
truly pursuing it,
is a sacrifice,
but this is the time
to give directing a real shot,
because otherwise, Julia?
This can't be my life.
I need more.
Good.
I-I have more for you.
I'm pregnant.
Dr. Jenkins called
this afternoon.
I know that work is hard,
but, I don't know,
maybe it'll be easier when
you have a little bundle of joy
to come home to, crying
and screaming and pooping
and keeping you up all night.
We're having a baby?
Yeah. We are.
So can you hang in there?
And, I don't know,
maybe give me a hug?
Come here. Come here.
Of course. Come here.
Come here.
Come here. Of course.
Of course.
Mm!
Thank you.
Well, you're going to heaven.
When my father stayed with us,
I went right out
of my fucking mind.
Oh, Dad likes you. Oh.
Oh, Dad likes you. Oh.
Wanted you to come to lunch
with us today.
I was grocery shopping
with Dorothy.
You're all set with
boeuf bourguignon for this week
and for class on Sunday.
Oh, great.
Uh-huh.
Your troops are on it.
Yes, well, your general is not.
Oh, Avis, I don't know
if I can do all this.
You can.
Your next script's not due
until Monday.
When do I write it?
Saturday.
Well, when do I sleep?
Oh. Well,
at least you don't have Paul
underfoot this weekend.
How are he and Antoine
getting along?
Oh, Avis DeVoto!
Antoine Lawrence
is a very old friend
with very good taste
who owes me a favor.
Oh, my goodness.
I'm a terrible person.
First lying to my husband
about my show
and then lying to him again
about his show.
Oh
Don't pick that up.
And don't beat yourself up.
Antoine loved Paul's work.
He was happy
to give him a chance.
You see, I want
to do all this, I do,
but I may be at the end
of my rope.
And the teaching
is just too much.
And there's a limit to what
I can ask of you and Dorothy.
We're happy to do it.
But Dorothy needs a babysitter.
I feel like
I'm taking advantage.
And Antoine, good taste
notwithstanding,
I'm still lying to my husband.
Whether you tell Paul or not,
you still need the money,
and he's far too proud to let
you foot the bill yourself.
So in this case, my dear,
the truth will not set you free.
Are you sure?
My advice is, stop this
yakky yak and enjoy the ride.
And finish what's left
of your butter pecan.
Leave it to you to find
the one ice cream
actually made with butter.
And you're the one
eating rocky road,
which may be prescient.
Paulski,
can I borrow your brain
for just a moment
and ask for help?
What do you think
of these edits?
I need to get the changes
to Russ for the tech rehearsal.
Well, I'm all yours
if you'll help me figure out
how to arrange these pieces.
I'm trying to tell a story,
but I don't think
I've cracked it yet.
Oh.
Right-o.
Running water.
What the fuck?
That's exactly what I said.
You two.
Ladies.
Sergeant Morash.
Sergeant Morash.
Alright, alright, alright.
Let's get started.
Okay, everybody.
First positions for rehearsal!
Let's get ready
to, uh, get ready.
Okay, Julia, let's start
with the pot on the burner
and take it off the heat,
remove the lid, give a taste,
and then put it in the top oven.
Jim, can you bring
your camera in here?
Avis and Dorothy, why don't we
keep you behind the counter
until she goes to the oven? Got it.
until she goes to the oven? Got it.
Julia.
I like those recipes
you submitted.
Oh, good.
A thought
Instead of structuring
the season like a meal,
appetizers followed
by entrees then desserts,
let's toggle between courses
so we don't have
five soup episodes in a row.
Oh, that's stupendous
thinking, Russ.
Avis, you have those onions?
Yes.
Peeled and unpeeled
and
cooked.
Great.
Now, Julia, I need you here
but looking into camera 2
as you cut through
the slices of beef.
And, Avis, you can trick out
the cooked onions
as the camera's tight on Julia.
Like magic.
Exactly.
So, I-I was thinking
What is it?
Which camera is which?
That was the problem I had
during the damned pilot.
Yes, it was,
so let's make this
a little more clear for you.
I stole these from the set
of "Karate Kats."
Maybe they'll help? Oh, yes!
Maybe they'll help? Oh, yes!
Friends!
Little friends to talk to.
This is Binky.
Binky.
He'll be your friend until
you go for that cutting board.
After that, you'll be
with Boochie.
Boochie. He'll be your main man Boochie.
He'll be your main man
until you start
on the mushrooms.
Oh, Russ, I have
so much to learn.
Yes, you do.
But that's what rehearsal's for.
Oh, holy Moses,
I'm going to get this.
Alright, folks, let's take it
from the top
and give it a go with food.
No, I Before
Before we begin,
I just want to thank you all
for taking this ride with me.
To have this opportunity
at my age is
Everyone's working so hard.
I can't believe how lucky I am.
I'm going to swing for the
fences on every single show,
and regardless of what happens,
at least there will always
be leftovers.
Yeah.
Albert: Alice! My fern!
May I?
Please.
Ah.
So that's how you paint
a pomegranate.
How much would someone pay
for something like that?
Well, I tend to
leave the business concerns
to other people.
Ah.
The art and the expression,
they're the
They're what get my attention.
I got to tell you, Paul, words
like "art" and "expression"
send me right to the crapper.
It's funny. I didn't think
you could turn a hobby
into a career at your age.
But then, what do I know?
I didn't get into it
for the money.
Of course you didn't.
Well, I suppose every man
must have his arena.
Evidently, this is yours.
Is there anything else
I can help you with, John?
Uh, no. No,
I'm driving into Boston
to meet with an associate.
I should get moving. Take me
five hours to find parking.
I know what you're thinking.
I know what you mean,
and it's not true.
What am I thinking, Paul?
That I married Julia
for her money.
Why else?
How sad that you can't see
what I see.
Well?
Julia, it looks wonderful.
Oh, Alice, come see.
It works!
Oh, I've heard all about
the running water from Albert.
Oh, is that where you've been.
With Duke?
I've missed you.
We've all missed you.
Paul was ready to send out
the search brigade.
I was pulled off your show.
Yes, I know.
I heard.
I have found that I've had
the most success
when I've figured out
how to make myself
absolutely necessary
and indispensable.
For such a talent as you,
dear Alice,
I can't imagine that being
too difficult.
Oh.
Ham and pickle,
no crust, no mustard.
Thank you, dear.
You okay, Big John?
Oh, yeah. I'm fine.
Um, I was gonna drop this
in the mail,
but, uh, now I can save
a stamp this month.
Well, thanks, Pop.
You sure you can't stay?
You'd get to watch the show
being taped.
You'd be my very first
live audience.
No, I'm sorry.
I really need to get down
to my meetings in New York.
Business is business.
Well, you should know
all about that by now,
what with everything
you've got on your plate.
Yes, I feel like you and Gramps,
taking big risks and
this leap of faith.
You're your
father's daughter now, are you?
I am.
Let's not let another year
go by.
I'm going to be sad when you go.
It's been such a nice visit.
It certainly was.
Phila and I will look forward
to your next trip out west.
And if you wanted to come alone,
that would be even better.
Dad?
Yeah?
Oh, it's nothing.
Can I give you a hand?
I'm alright.
Why won't you let me help you?
We're all here to help.
Julia.
Be a lady?
Be a lady.
I am a lady, Dad.
Just not your type.
And that's okay.
You always gave me
everything I needed,
and I love you for that.
Well, good.
And I need one more thing.
Like Jayne Mansfield.
Oh!
Isn't she a Playboy bunny?
It's never too late, love.
I agree. Beautiful.
Thank you.
Maybe on Sunday
we can celebrate
with some champagne on the pier.
We have class on Sunday.
No, we don't.
I've found a way
to cover expenses for the show.
And I'm paying for a babysitter.
Oh, I couldn't.
Oh, you can, and you shall.
WoJulia, we need you.
Alright, crazy kids,
let's give this a try!
Everybody in positions, please.
One moment, please.
Very nervous.
Don't be nervous, darling,
whatever happens.
Thank you.
Mm-hmm.
Here we go with Episode 1.
Talk to Binky. Talk to Binky.
Talk to Binky.
And quiet on set, please!
We're ready in 5, 4, 3
Welcome to "The French Chef."
Welcome to "The French Chef."
I'm Julia Child.
Things look swell,
things look great ♪
Gonna have the whole world
on a plate ♪
Starting here, starting now ♪
Honey, everything's
comin' up roses ♪
Clear the decks,
clear the tracks ♪
We got nothing to do
but relax ♪
Blow a kiss, take a bow ♪
Honey, everything's
comin' up roses ♪
Now's our inning ♪
Stand the world on its ear ♪
Set it spinning ♪
That'll be
just the beginning ♪
Curtain up, light the lights ♪
We got nothin' to hit
but the heights ♪
We'll be swell,
we'll be great ♪
I can tell, just you wait ♪
That lucky star I talk about
is due ♪
Honey, everything's
coming up roses ♪
For me and for you ♪