Moonbase 8 (2020) s01e03 Episode Script

1
[Cap]
Ah, thank you.
Yes, I will take that.
No, no, no, no! Come on!
[project manager]
Attention, Moonbase 8.
-[sighs]
-We've received your answers
on your psychological
evaluation reports.
We've left more than
four lines per answer,
and we're hoping you can
elaborate on your answers
-beyond simple yes or noes.
-[Rook] Told you guys,
we rushed through those answers.
We should
We should've spent more time.
We also wish to inform you
that your new base mate
will be arriving shortly.
All right, let's clean
this place up. We got company.
I would've saved my game.
They should give us notice.
Bullshit.
upbeat music
[Rook]
Morning, everybody.
Hey, Alisha.
-Morning.
-Smells good, Skip.
[Alisha]
Hey, Rook, uh, do you know
what the efficiency loss
percentage was from last month?
I didn't see it logged.
Oh, yeah. The, uh
Uh, I should know that.
It's 20 per
I think it was 20, thir
it was like 20 or 30.
-Skip, do you remember
what that was?
-8.2.
Eight it was
eight point 8.2.
-[Alisha] Well, thank you.
-[Skip] All right.
Beef. It's what's for breakfast.
[chuckles] Like the,
uh, old commercial, right?
[Skip chuckles]
I'm still working,
but thank you, Michael.
Um, it's Skip.
You can call me that,
or you can call me Skippy,
or, uh, Skipson, I don't mind.
Don't call him Skunk,
you'll get in trouble. Huh?
[chuckles]
Um,
I know you're new here.
We've got, um,
a little bit of a-a rule.
Might be silly to some,
but it's important to us.
We don't, uh, work
during meals.
Well, I'm just trying
to fill in some gaps
on these spreadsheets.
-[Skip] Yeah
-[Cap coughing]
[sneezing]
-Hey, Cap, you all right?
-[Cap] I'm fine.
[clears throat]
Good morning.
-Morning.
-[Rook] You're not feeling well?
[coughing]
It's probably just allergies.
I get I get
allergies sometimes.
-[coughing]
-You, uh, you don't look good.
[coughs, hawks]
I'm fine. I'm fine.
[clears throat]
Well, according to the medical
protocol of the base manual,
which, I'm sure
you guys read, right?
The manual?
-Yeah.
-We read it every day.
Yeah, I mesmerized it.
Uh, if you are sick,
we need to make sure
-that you're not contagious.
-you're not contagious.
[blowing nose]
If we get sick,
the mission fails.
This You know, the mission
fails if we get sick, Cap.
It's in the book.
[sneezes, coughs]
We'll need to quarantine you.
We need to quarantine you.
[coughing]
Oh, come on. That's overkill.
[blows nose]
You better listen to her, Cap.
[Skip]
You know, um,
I'm a doctor.
Here, I'm the
the team medic, as it were.
You know what?
That's really great.
Because you can do
the examination on Mr. Caputo
-to determine if he needs
to be quarantined or not.
-[Cap] Oh, come on.
-Ha, ha.
-[Cap sneezes]
[Skip] All right.
Cap, we got to go
-do an examination.
-It's just I told you,
it's allergies.
-Well, well, let's have
make sure that that's the case.
-Can we turn up the heat?
It's freezing in here.
-[Rook] Have fun, you two.
-[Cap exhales]
-Those guys, huh?
-[Alisha] Yeah.
Those guys are crazy.
[chuckles]
Anyway
[sighs]
[coughing]
This is a waste of time.
Well, technically, we're
supposed to do an examination,
so let me just do it.
-Put this in your mouth.
-[sneezes]
Now I got the hiccups.
-[beeps]
-Ooh, 104. That's not good.
It's perfectly normal.
[Skip]
That's not normal at all.
-There is a little bit
of inflammation--
-Why are you doing this, man?
Stop talking, Cap.
That's good.
No, you don't make it tight
like that; you make it tight
-with the thing.
-I'll do it. Stop.
-You're being impatient.
-[groans]
Hawaii, that must be nice, huh?
Yeah.
What's tourism like
these days in Hawaii?
I don't know. I've been here.
Mr. Caputo.
Ow. What are you doing?!
-There you go.
-[gags]
Don't put it on your tongue;
put it on your cheek.
[muffled]
Like this.
My cheek?
Ah, ah! That's too much.
That's too much.
Why do you need
that much blood?
Ow! Ah!
All right, Doc,
give it to me straight.
[clears throat]
What's the diagnosis?
So this is the designated
quarantine area.
Let's keep this
an outbreak of one.
All righty.
[sneezes]
[Rook] All right,
let me know
if you need
any magazines, buddy.
I'll be fine here.
[groans]
[Skip] You got to drink
plenty of fluids, all right?
Don't forget to hydrate.
Will do.
[sniffles]
Now, are you sure you don't want
to take any antibiotics
-or antihistamines to help
relieve the symptoms?
-Nah.
I just need to let my body
do its thing.
All right.
We'll be praying for you.
[chuckles] Not gonna be
that drastic, I hope.
[coughs]
atmospheric music
[Cap]
Hello? Anybody there?
Rook? Skip?
-[Cap sneezing]
-Hey, Cap. Is that you?
[coughing]
Ow.
Listen, do we have any lemons
anywhere on the base?
Uh
I think we got some
Country Time powdered stuff.
-Will that do it?
-Ah, no, no, no.
I need some lemons,
and I need 'em piping hot.
That's the thing.
That's what's [coughs]
Yeah. I-I Like I said,
I don't think
we have any, but, uh--
Do you know how much vitamin C
is locked in that rind?
And once you heat it up,
it just
-All right.
-blooms like a flower.
All right, man. I just
I got to get back to work, so
Yeah. Hey, how's your family
doing? [clears throat]
-Uh
-You got kids, right?
-Hello?
-Yeah, I'm still here,
but listen, I don't want
to hang up on you.
I just I got to go.
I got to get back to work.
-We'll talk to you later.
-Rook?
-[phone beeps]
-Rook?
What are you doing?
I'm washing my dishes.
Doesn't the chart wheel say
you're on laundry duty?
-[coughing]
-I'm just washing my dishes.
You don't want me
washing my own dishes?
No, I mean, I'd prefer you'd
just leave them in the sink
so that whoever is on dish duty
can get them.
I mean, why have a chore wheel
if we're gonna do everything
willy-nilly?
Well, if you want
to improve efficiency,
I suggest creating an algorithm
based on availability
instead of a rotating pie chart
used by kindergarten teachers.
That's not very nice.
[chuckles] You know,
everything was working just fine
until you got here.
And by the way,
I spent 15 years at JPL
designing efficiency algorithms,
all right?
For satellite exploration.
Satellites.
[Rook] Does anybody know if we
have any, uh, citrus fruit?
I know we don't,
but I-I got
to double-check.
Uh, we have vitamin C
supplements.
[sighs] No.
He doesn't want supplements.
He wants actual lemons, okay?
He needs the pulp or something.
[coughs]
-Ugh.
-[Alisha] Michael?
-Mm-hmm?
-It sounds like you've got
what Robert's got.
I don't think I do.
I think I'm okay.
[stifles cough]
You don't look too good, Skip.
Let me see. Come here.
-Don't Uh, don't--
-Ooh. Yeah, you're burning up.
Let me see your tongue.
Ugh. Yeah.
You don't look great.
[sniffles]
-Cap? Cap, are you there?
-[Cap coughing]
This is Caputo.
I read you. What do you need?
-[coughs]
-[Alisha] Yes, uh, Dr. Henai
has come down with
whatever it is you have,
and we're gonna have to
quarantine him as well.
Well, I can't have
another sick person in here.
I'm already sick.
Uh, Mr. Caputo, this is serious.
Yeah, I know it's serious,
believe me.
I'm in here suffering with it.
[clears throat]
But he cannot be in here.
I cannot have another
sick person in here with me.
Then he gives me his strain,
then I got a double strain,
and that's a superbug.
No.
[coughs]
There's no way you're gonna
kill a double strain with
-whatever medicine
we have on the base.
-[coughing]
Has anyone been able
to find me any lemons yet?
We will get you your lemons.
Go. Greenhouse.
[Cap]
I hope so, 'cause,
[clears throat]
the only way I see
-[sniffs, coughs]
-Well, I don't know why
Skip keeps coming back here.
[quietly]
You cannot be here.
Go back.
Here's another idea.
This is
what I can do,
is I will make a sweat lodge
about two klicks from here,
and then Skip can be in here.
-I-I'm sorry, a-a what?
-A sweat lodge.
It's what Native Americans used
to heal themselves--
Okay, Mr. Caputo, you know it's
a harsh environment out there.
-I wouldn't recommend that.
-[Skip coughs]
[Cap]
Well, you're talking to
My father was nearly
an Eagle Scout,
-so I think I can--
-This time, he says
I've got to stay here and he's
not gonna have me back again.
-Okay, could you back up?
-And if I
If I'm back in my bunk,
that's where I'm gonna stay.
-I don't need to be going
back and forth--
-Okay. Uh, yes.
-One-one second, yes, yes.
-'Cause I don't know
who to listen to--
Okay, Mr. Caputo,
it's-it's your call.
Copy that. Responsibility
[coughs, sneezes]
is mine.
[engine running]
[coughs, sniffles]
[coughing]
solemn music
[sneezes]
[groans softly]
[grunting]
[coughing]
[sniffling, babbling]
[coughing]
Huh?
Yes? What?
Hello?
[exhales]
[blows raspberry]
[whispers]
I'm just gonna
What's up?
Uh, nothing. Do you mind?
I was gonna
-get in the kitchen
for a minute, just--
-Oh, uh,
you know, actually,
can you take a look at this?
So, Rook, I see
you've been here
-for over 200 days.
-Yeah.
Would you say that the isolation
from your friends and family
has had an effect on your mood?
Hmm.
Yeah. I guess so.
Yeah, you could say that.
Miss my kids. Not my wife.
[chuckles]
Don't know why I said
[stammers]
I miss my family.
-[exhales]
-Well, uh, you know, isolation
is a big part of the mission.
-I want to keep track
of how you're feeling.
-Yeah.
I keep a diary.
So, no no worries there.
What was I even in here for?
Darn it.
You writing about me or?
Oh, no.
Just, uh, finishing up
my psychological impact study.
Oh, cool. That sounds neat.
[clears throat]
Hey, you know what?
I was gonna cook up
some beef-style stew
if you're hungry.
Uh, sure. I'll take some stew.
Really?
Should I do two separate packs
or combine the pack?
Do you mind if our stews
simmer together?
[exhales]
You know what?
Ah! Darn it! I forgot.
I was supposed to, uh,
clean up the solar panels.
Darn!
Shoot!
[groans]
[sniffles, coughs]
atmospheric music
[sneezes, coughs]
Yeah. There she is.
[sniffles] You gonna
keep me company tonight?
[coughs]
It's just you and me.
[sniffles]
Let's get this place heated up.
[coughing]
[engine running]
[groaning]
suspenseful music
Alisha?
[gasps]
Help!
[gasping]
Look at you.
You're pathetic.
[Skip]
That's not true.
We're very proud of you.
-Oh, shut up.
-Oh.
That's too negative.
No.
[scoffs]
You guys aren't real.
This is [exhales]
This is my fever.
You know, no one's
told you this,
but we're very
disappointed in you.
You really
let everybody down.
You suck. Sorry.
He's lying.
You're doing fantastic.
Man, look
at Alisha.
She's smarter than you.
That's what you should be.
You're just
dead weight.
No, I'm not.
-Don't listen to him.
-Yeah.
Don't listen to me.
What do I know, right?
Maybe Ms. Lazar should slap you
in the back of the head
like she did in second grade.
[chuckles]
Don't tell him that.
-[makes whipping sound]
-Could we just
hold on for a minute?
I just want to say,
you look great.
Let me tell you,
really,
man-to-man
you're an idiot.
-[sobbing]
-Oh, you're gonna cry?
Skip, come on.
-Why are you crying?
-Hey, you know what?
I think you look great
even when you're crying.
[chuckles]
[Cap coughing]
[Rook]
Hey, Cap?
[sneezes, coughs]
Cap, you there?
[Cap]
Yeah! Rook?
[Rook] Yeah,
I was just checking on you.
Seeing how you're doing.
[Cap]
Yeah, come on in.
[Cap grunts]
[exhales]
So, how you feeling?
-Any better?
-[coughing]
You know
[clears throat]
I'm getting there.
[clears throat]
You didn't bring hot lemons
with you, did you?
No, I'm still working
on that. Um
I almost got
this sickness I mean,
I just got to sweat a
little bit more. I can feel it.
Well, you sure got it
hot enough in here.
Yeah? I'll turn one down.
I'll turn it down for you.
I don't need to be that hot.
[grunts, groans]
Ah, yeah.
That-that should do it.
Oh. What's happening, buddy?
Well, uh, I just wanted to get
your two cents on something.
Um
You know, Alisha and I
are kind of alone
at the base right now.
Skip's in the greenhouse and
[scoffs]
There's some sparks flying, Cap.
Yeah?
Uh, I've never
been tempted
like this before in my life.
I'm not sure
what I'm supposed to do.
Well, you know,
lighting's very important.
And you want to just
make her feel safe
and put on some music,
nothing with lyrics.
-Just instrumental music.
-Oh.
-And then--
-No. I'm
I'm sorry to interrupt. Um
I'm not trying to get advice
on how to hook up.
I'm just trying
to figure out if I should.
You know?
Are you gay?
No. Cap, I've got a wife
and kids. I'm--
-Oh. Yeah.
-[chuckles]
I just wonder
if Christ is
presenting me with
a new relationship path,
or is it the devil himself,
-tempting me
-[yawns] Uh-huh.
to commit
the ultimate sin?
Not necessarily
the ultimate sin, but one of
the Ten Commandments is:
"Do not," uh,
"trespass against thou"
What is it? "Do not trespass
against thou s-spouse."
Well, uh
I don't know what
to tell you, Rook. I
I got to get some rest here.
I'm getting real tired
just listening to you talk.
-Oh. Oh.
-No offense, just
You probably shouldn't have come
in here. It's a quarantine
-[coughing]
-Oh, right.
Shoot. Yeah.
-[sneezing, coughing]
-Okay, well, yeah,
you're-you're probably right.
I better head out.
Yeah.
All right. Get well.
And all the best, for all that.
I'm hot and cold
at the same time.
[coughs]
Can someone
please unlock this?
[Skip]
Skip.
No one can hear you.
Give him a break.
Well, what am I supposed to do?
You're an engineer from MIT.
MIT?
-Yes, MIT.
-Skip, come on.
You got brains.
Why aren't you using them?
I'm trying. I just got to
figure out a way to do it
within the bounds
of protocol here.
You are qualified
to really go to the Moon.
These guys are
weighing you down.
He does have a little bit
of a point. I'm sorry.
You're a real disappointment,
you know that?
[Rook]
Okay. All right.
[exhales]
eerie, discordant music
[grunts, panting]
[groans loudly]
Dear Lord,
what am I supposed to do here?
frantic music
[indistinct whispering]
[skittering]
Hello?
Who's there?
Rook?!
-[rustling]
-[gasping]
[screams]
Ah! Help! Help!
Help! Ah!
Dear God, I know
you've been quiet on this,
but I lust for her
so badly, and
and I know she does me, as well.
I can feel it.
[yelping, grunting]
Get it off me!
[shouting]
Should I just have relations
with Alisha
and deal with
the consequences later?
[shouting indistinctly]
At least tell me
if I should go in there
and tell her how I feel.
[yelling]
Yes, Lord. Thank you.
Thank you, Lord.
[breathing hard]
All right, Skip,
here's what you're gonna do.
You're gonna walk up to Alisha
and tell her your feelings.
Tell her that
you're in charge.
And if she doesn't hear you,
I want you to burn down
that base. Do you hear me?
Burn down that base.
That's how you show them
you're in charge.
Repeat it back to me.
-[gasps]
-Skip, what's wrong?
Can't talk?
Oh, I know.
It's your tonsils.
They have to come out.
[chuckles]
Burn down the base.
Burn it down!
[giggling wildly]
gentle music
Oh, what have you done
To my heart, Elaine?
[groans]
It just doesn't seem
[Jeane]
Well.
Look who's awake.
You got quite a scorpion sting
on your lip, there, guy.
-Huh?
-We were out stargazing
and saw your flare
and brought you in.
Mm.
[mumbling]
Those are Darren's clothes,
by the way, that you got on.
He gave you a bath.
[thickly]
Who's Darren?
[toilet flushes]
Oh, hello.
The astronaut's awake.
[Jeane]
This is our son, Darren.
This is my husband, Bob,
and I'm Jeane.
-Oh.
-[Jeane] We're Canadians.
-From outside Calgary.
-Yep.
Come down here every year
for just about two weeks.
-Mm.
-Beats three feet of snow, eh?
-[soft laughter]
-[grunts]
[Jeane] Darren's having
kind of a hard time lately.
-I--
-Divorce and
-job displacement.
-[Bob] Yeah, well,
Darren had him a metal band
back in the--
-[overlapping arguing]
-[babbling]
No, no, no, no
no, no, no, no.
-[Bob] Oh, no, no. Here, here.
-[Jeane] Keep your seat.
-Keep your seat. Keep your seat.
-[Bob] We got we got you
-fully medicated here.
-[Jeane] We'll take
We got you.
We're gonna take care of you
just the way we did
when we found you
out there in the desert
-all by yourself.
-Yes.
[thickly] My name is
Lieutenant Robert Caputo.
My serial number is
six, four, three, sev
[grunts]
[Jeane]
Oh.
[Bob]
Oh, he passed out.
-He passed--
-Let him sleep.
-[Bob] Let him sleep.
-[Jeane] Let him sleep.
[Bob] We'll take him back
in the morning.
[Jeane]
Perfect.
quick, optimistic music
[inhales]
[exhales forcefully]
[exhales]
Yes?
Alisha, how do you want
to proceed here?
Proceed with what?
There's obviously something
going on between us.
Let's not be naive here.
Look, I
I've come here to do a job.
And I would appreciate it if
you treated me like a teammate
and not a sexual object.
Totally. Totally.
I-I get it. It's just
You asked me to think
about how I'm feeling
and how isolation
is affecting my mood and
I told you that I was lonely.
But that was a lie.
Ever since you've been
at this base,
I have not felt
lonely at all.
I've I've felt warmth.
I've felt something
I haven't felt since I was 16.
[sighs]
Look, I know that feelings
can get complicated out here.
I know.
But I would really hate
to have to report you.
Right. I get it.
It's complicated, and
Listen, I'm-I'm a father.
I've got 12 kids.
I'm-I'm a married man.
But that can change.
That shouldn't change.
All right. Just
sleep on it, okay?
Okay. Yeah. Go
-Go Have a good night.
-Okay.
Well, good night.
Good night, Rook.
Can a guy at least get
a good-night kiss
before he goes to sleep?
[grunts]
[shouts]
Look here. I've been dealing
with this my entire life.
I know exactly who I am.
I'm smart, I'm beautiful,
and I don't give
a damn about you,
your penis
or anything you got to say
with your pasty, white, chalky,
Bible-thumping nitwit ass.
-[moans]
-You don't look at me,
you don't talk to me,
you don't breathe
the same air as me.
-Are we clear?
-Yes.
Great. You have a good night.
[exhales]
quick, optimistic music
You know what? This is fine.
-[Bob] You sure?
-Yes. I'll take it from here.
-Thank you.
-[Bob] You betcha.
Good luck.
[panting]
[grunts]
[exhales]
[quietly] There's gonna be
some big changes around here.
Got a lot of changes.
Really big changes,
working very
Dr. Henai. Feeling better?
Much better. Okay. I've got
some new ideas on how things
-are gonna work around--
-You can save it, Dr. Henai.
I just got my orders.
I'm going up.
Can you let
the guys know
that this has been
a very educational--
-[clanging]
-Ow.
Um, sorry. I'm just getting
some breakfast.
-You're leaving?
-Anybody home?
Hey.
Told you. Just needed
a little fresh air.
Mr. Caputo,
you sound much better.
-I stand corrected.
-[Cap] Yep.
Fresh air, a little hot sweat.
Would've been a lot faster
with some lemons,
Rook.
Anyway, where you going?
To the Moon, Mr. Caputo.
Maybe I'll see you there
one day.
-Really?
-Mm.
After four days,
you've completed the program?
-On whose orders?
-NASA's.
Are you in the August 11 launch?
-I thought there was
no more room on that.
-[Bob] Hello!
-[Jeane] Hello?
-[Bob] Anyone here?
Anyone home?
-Oh, God.
-[Jeane] Oh, hi!
We were looking for Mr. Caputo.
-He forgot his Dimetapp.
-Hi. Of course. Yeah. Thank you.
Oh, I see.
[Jeane]
Wow, look at this. Darren!
-Darren, come here and see.
-Come here. Come on.
-Oh.
-Once in a lifetime. Come on.
Now, if you boys
need anything,
we're just up the road
for the next few weeks.
Well, I don't want
to break up the party,
so, uh, good luck.
See you up there.
Ah.
-Cool base.
-Yeah.
Is she gone?
"Blue Funk"
by The PR TV Band