Planet Sex with Cara Delevingne (2022) s01e03 Episode Script
Can Porn Be Good?
Okay. Ready?
- Yes?
- We are ready.
Nat, how do you feel?
I would like to know what is it
that brings you all to orgasm.
Well, then in that
case, play with my balls.
Lick them, suck them, play with them.
That would help me. Orgasm, balls.
Good luck to everyone, and
let's have a great party.
The porn industry is
estimated to be worth
up to a whopping $100
billion dollars a year,
with more web traffic
than Netflix, Amazon and Hulu combined.
I'm about to dig into
the real impact of porn.
I know, some of it's gross.
Like, this is really mad.
And some of it downright nasty!
- Oh.
- This is horrible.
But is there an alternative?
Hi!
They're just hugging. It's great.
Is there such a thing as good porn?
Yeah, go, come, whoo!
Look, we can't show you
all the naughty bits,
but I guarantee you're
still in for a saucy time.
- Thank you so much!
- Thank you!
Porn.
All right, come on,
let's talk about porn.
So, what exactly is pornography?
Well, it's anything with sexual content
designed to turn you on.
And today there is a lot of it.
Oh, okay.
Everyday there are hundreds
of millions of visits
to porn sites across the world.
With most people watching
it on their mobiles,
porn is now more accessible than ever,
which means you can watch it
anywhere, anytime, all the time.
Guys do you want some pizza?
But this frothy fantasy of
cheerleaders and pool boys
is a long way from the dark
reality of how porn makes me feel.
I started watching porn pretty young
and couldn't really come without
it for a long period of time.
And it wasn't until
a couple of years ago
when I started trying
to masturbate without it
and it was hard. Without a sex toy too.
Porn is quite intense, and
I think it can be quite scary
when it gives young
people a very skewed way
of how sex should be and
what intimacy should be.
I've seen a lot of porn
that taps into our worst
most basic instincts.
And banning it won't make it go away.
It's really gross 'cause
even after you watch it,
you're, like, "I feel disgusting."
So is porn inherently bad, or
is it possible to make good porn?
Barcelona, porn capital of Europe.
I've heard that amongst the
many porn producers here,
there's one fighting to change
the industry for the better.
And action!
Erika Lust creates films
that are radically different
to the free easily accessible stuff
you find on most porn websites.
She takes a totally ethical approach.
There's a whole indie movement, really.
Smaller production companies of
directors, producers, performers,
who are trying to make
a different kind of porn,
a porn that is respecting people.
- Plan B.
- So, we're on set, right?
So, in terms of the porn you
make, why did you end up doing that
and what was it about mainstream porn
that is a problem?
It's the whole kind of system, I think.
I think most of the people making
it are the same kind of men,
the kind of middle-aged,
white, cis, hetero guy,
and it's his version
of porn that we see.
And I'm so tired of
all this kind of videos
talking about banging,
smashing, needling.
- Pounding. Screwing.
- Punish
When you watch women having
sex with these men or whatever,
you can tell they're not
turned on. It's crazy.
With mainstream porn today,
there's one big company.
They're based in Montreal, Canada.
They are the leader in this industry.
They are what we could call "Big Porn."
They are not interested
in human sexuality.
It's all about traffic,
nasty, dirty, ugly as possible
to earn money.
So I wanted to show you a few clips,
to look a little about, you
know, what's wrong with porn.
A few examples of online
sites. So, here what do we see?
We see two big men, and
we see a very young girl.
- She looks so young.
- If we read the tagline, it says,
"Tiny teen destroyed by
two giant black dudes."
And this is an example of
so many things that's wrong.
The racialisation
also of the characters,
and she obviously looks
much less than 18 years old.
- Like, this is really bad.
- It's really bad that it's accepted.
So gross!
Here's another really good example.
This is about "Lesbian beauty
tries her first cock and loves it."
And what is this about?
Well, this is about the idea
that no woman could really be a lesbian
because most women,
if they just try cock,
that's what they want.
- You think she's really a lesbian?
- I don't think so.
So many of my straight
girlfriends watch lesbian porn.
That's their favourite one to watch
because it's safer, but I'm like,
"It's not really lesbians
either. It's not really anything."
And again, "Teen slut
used by the whole dorm."
Look at the language.
This is There's no end to it.
And then I have an example that
you're not gonna like at all.
Deep fake. They put your
face on another person's body.
- Let's see if it
- Oh!
This is horrible.
- Have you seen this?
- No, I haven't seen that.
That is honestly very shocking to see.
One of the reasons why I'm doing it
is because I want to
change porn culture.
I've also seen how this
independent movement around porn
has grown since I started.
I never even considered or thought
there was female directors in porn.
Yeah, and you know what? My audience.
Around 60% of the audience are men,
and I really believe that
if we want to change porn,
we can't continue just
accepting what's out there.
What I'm trying to do in my films
is to bring more women
into adult filmmaking
because that's the only
way we're going to be able
to see the perspective shift.
So for me the answer is
really, let's make better porn.
What she showed me was
yeah, really horrifying.
I didn't understand the extent
of what we were discussing
in terms of what is there
available to people for free,
which makes me believe in
what she does even more so.
Don't normalise that
thought. It's not okay.
Erika's got me so fired up
about making better porn,
that I'm going to work with her
to turn my wildest
fantasies into a new film.
All's fair, I guess, on Planet Sex.
I was completely desensitised
by the porn I'd watched.
In my mind, the dangerous part,
it's a lot of female objectification.
That's when it got dangerous for
me, but that's what excited me.
I speak to a lot of women,
and they have the same feeling.
And it's horrible. There's so
much shame involved in that.
You can't ever unsee any of that stuff.
There's a lot of weird
shit in the world.
And lots of that extreme
stuff is found here, Japan.
Look, I love this country so much,
but when it comes to
erotic depictions of women,
oh, dear, it can be
pretty dark and degrading.
Akihabara shopping district
is the beating heart of
Japan's manga industry.
We're not allowed to film in here,
but I'm going to take
a look, buy some stuff,
and I'll see you in a minute.
I'm sensing two main themes here.
An obsession with
wildly oversized breasts
and the sexualisation of school girls.
And both creep me out.
Whoa! Like, this image is crazy.
Oh, my God, I've just
realised what's happening.
There's a lot of, like, come everywhere.
Like, why are her nipples
constantly squirting milk?
I hope they are drinking water
because there's so much fluid.
Oh, God!
Let's be real.
This is by straight
men for straight men.
But I've been told there's
an erotic manga subculture
that's way more appealing
to women and less degrading.
Boys Love or BL
is a work written for women
which depicts male-on-male
sexual love or strong bonds.
Stay with me here.
Yes, Boys Love is gay sex between men,
but drawn by and aimed at women.
So, I was very fascinated
when I heard the opposite of
what the male comic books are,
was two gay men.
How is it so different in Boys Love?
The form of a boy is an ideal,
free from the constraints of gender.
The boy represents an
alter ego for a girl.
They are both giving
pleasure at the same time.
You can be emotionally involved
in both of them at the same time.
It's very interesting that
mostly women like Boys Love.
Why do you think it's
important that women see men
in a portrayal where they show emotions?
So, the sexual pleasure in Boys Love
is similar to female pleasure.
But it is portrayed as a
man's feelings, in a male form.
I think that is why it's so attractive.
There's not a lot of
freedom, especially for women.
By removing that restriction,
by having two men,
you can depict a love affair
between two people who
have removed their chains.
Women are so often
depicted as just taking it,
but in Boys Love, the
sex is between two people
who are passionate about
giving and receiving pleasure.
Obviously, BL has a
really positive influence.
Do you hope it reaches a wider audience?
And what do you think it teaches people?
BL culture is already
spreading around the world
and that leads to support
for real gay people.
In that sense, Boys
Love is very freeing.
It can shine a light on relationships
we couldn't name before.
The thing that surprised me the most
is that I just didn't
know Boys Love existed,
in terms of a comic book that's sexual
but about the emotions and feelings,
more like a kind of, like, a
romantic erotic novel, let's say.
And I kind of wish
there was a middle ground
that straight men could be
into that wasn't so sexual.
We can draw anime.
We need more stuff like
Japan's Boys Love comics.
Sexy stories that reflect
the full range of
human sexual experience,
not just what straight men want.
- Are we on now?
- We're on, ready to rock and roll.
I've had some hot ideas for a film,
and want to run them by Erika Lust.
What are you thinking about?
Your own stories, your fantasies?
The things that I find extremely sexy
are the forbidden,
like English repression,
in terms of sexuality.
I remember watching The Crown
because I thought the Royal Family
and how repressed they were was
the hottest thing in the world.
I'm English. That shit is hot.
- Get me going.
- No, but
It's something that people
are looking for more lately.
- The Bridgerton porn kind of style.
- See?
Okay, all the best. I
cannot wait to work with you.
It's going to be amazing.
Thank you so much.
I realise that not all
porn is problematic.
Erika's ethical feminist films
and Japan's Boys Love erotica
give me hope that there's
positive stuff out there too.
In fact, sometimes it can
even be kind of meaningful.
Should I have the glasses on or off?
I think off.
Deutschland mit Gandalf.
- Willkommen Berlin.
- Danke.
This not too shabby Trabi.
It's a beautiful car.
I mean, I love it.
It's It's very cool.
Will be dropping me at the
Schwules, or gay, Museum.
It looks pretty ordinary,
but this place owns
the biggest gay porn
stash in all the land.
More than a million items.
Straight in at the deep
end with Peter Rehberg.
- Wow, his penis is very large.
- Yeah, big dicks.
Yeah, large penises.
I'm hot again. Whoo! Yeah.
Jokes aside, Peter
knows that porn matters.
To have queer sexuality
represented in porn
is important for queer people.
You have very little representation
of queer people in mainstream
media to begin with.
Porn is a very central
moment of gay culture
because through porn you
have access to a gay universe,
the sense of belonging.
So, here this is the magazine section.
Playgirl, Playguy.
It's like an encyclopaedia
of everything.
And if we go over here,
we're approaching the porn collection.
Whoa! Now we're talking.
As you can see, many VHS tapes.
Wow! The Pizza Boy Two.
Oh, my God, there's a
lot of dicks and arses.
- Not a lot of women back here.
- No, it's not.
The majority is gay male porn, yes.
Most of this is commercial
porn from the '80s and '90s,
an important era of gay
porn, you know, post Aids.
I never thought how affirming it must be
to see your own gay sexuality
reflected back at you.
To Peter, this stuff
is real life history.
This is a Safer Sex porn
film produced in '89,
by a German director, Wieland Speck.
So, the idea here is that everybody
pretended there were no condoms,
you know, so you saw people
kissing, and then it came to the
And, suddenly, the guy had a condom on.
So he decided, "We try to
promote the use of condoms."
- Should we look at it?
- Yes.
Okay, let's move over.
So, here we go.
Look, it gives you instruction
of how to use a condom.
- "Gummi."
- It's a German word for rubber.
So the idea is to make
using a condom sexy.
Pornography has an
important educational value.
You, as a queer teenager,
if you watch porn,
no one is telling you how
queer sex works, right?
Finding out what your fantasies are.
What is happening here?
Why is he so bad at this?
- I don't know.
- Why is there so much ?
I've never seen that done before.
Oh, my God!
- That guy's thrilled.
- Yeah.
I think that the porn
collection is important
if you want to get
a comprehensive sense of queer culture.
Let's just say there's no
queer culture without porn.
I love Peter.
I want to go to dinner with
Peter and talk about porn.
To be honest, I didn't realise
how little I knew about porn,
and especially not queer porn.
They are drag queens. They
are beating up the skinheads.
I've never done anything like
this, so it's been really amazing.
- I love Berlin!
- Yeah! That's a wrap for Berlin!
- Thank you!
- Love you, guys.
Porn is something that, you know,
should be able to be
used, but should be made
from different cultures
and different viewpoints,
and instead it's made from
this very dominant male
objectifying viewpoint, in
my mind, most of the time.
So I'd like to see more diversity
in the people that write the porn,
the people that direct the porn,
the people that are in the porn.
I just want it to be real.
The problem with mainstream porn
is that it's a million miles away
from most people's real
lived experiences of sex.
Yet, the stats tell us
we are all consuming ever
increasing quantities.
So is there something
worse happening here?
Is porn actually addictive?
I was always searching
for the perfect clip,
and that perfect clip
didn't seem to exist.
I'm in LA, trying to get centred
in the company of Erica Garza.
She's a former porn addict
with a hellish tale to tell.
So, when I was 12,
I was diagnosed with
scoliosis, and so I had to wear
this big clunky back
brace under my shirts.
And I became really
introverted and insecure,
hating my body, and just really isolated
and filled with
self-loathing and self-hatred.
I found that if I masturbated,
I would get a break from
all of those bad feelings.
I would use porn as an escape from that.
When did you realise it was a problem?
I knew it was an addiction
because it was a compulsion
that I felt like I had no control over.
Just trying to continue
that sense of gratification.
You know, get turned
on, find a sexual release
and then start all over again.
Yeah, there were things in
there you just said that, um
yeah, I can definitely identify with.
You don't really realise
what an escape it is.
How did you turn the corner?
What did you do to find
that freedom to change?
I had ruined another relationship.
And I saw my 30 years ahead of me,
and I thought, "I want to
make this decade better."
I saw it as a turning point for me.
I started doing lots of
yoga, I started meditating,
and just taking care of myself.
That was a huge part of my healing.
That's when I started writing about it,
going to 12-step meetings and
starting to be open about this.
What a turnaround, but
what an amazing thing
to have accomplished,
especially being so brave
to be vulnerable about talking,
putting yourself out there like that.
When you're dealing with
something like addiction
and when you keep these things a secret,
it only intensifies the shame.
If you speak about these things
and you expose these secrets,
then you disempower them.
Yes.
Porn can definitely be an escape.
It's something that you
reach for to help you
and what you need or you rely on.
But the most interesting part is,
I very much related to
a lot of what she said,
the kind of porn she watched,
the relationships getting in the way of,
the feeling alone, the feeling isolated.
I related to all of it and was
like, "Wow, was I addicted to porn?"
I wouldn't watch it everyday, for sure.
I wouldn't need to
have an orgasm everyday,
but I needed to watch it to have one.
So, yeah, I mean, that's in its way
its own little addiction to porn.
Both Erica and I have certainly fallen
under the spell of mainstream porn.
But is it a real
addiction in the same way
as, say, gambling or alcoholism?
Not everyone believes so,
but new research is making
scientists think again.
The University of California, San Diego,
is the site of some hardcore research
into our darkest desires.
This guy spends a lot of time
thinking about, writing
about and looking at porn.
To be fair, at least he's got an excuse.
In my research, I try to understand
how the pornography
changes brain activity
and what we can do to help people quit.
For him, there's one question
more important than any other,
"Can you really get addicted to porn?"
For the majority of
people, pornography watching
is just an entertainment,
but the problem appears
when you cannot control
when do you watch,
how long do you watch and
when do you finish watching.
The average age of patients
we've seen in treatment
is around 27.
So usually they have
been watching pornography
already for about 15, 17
years up to 15 hours a day.
Mateusz believes answers might
lie in the structure of our brains.
So he takes heavy porn users
and sticks them in a scanner.
In our studies, we are using FMRI,
which allows us to compare the brains
of people who struggle with
problematic pornography use
with those who use porn, but
never experience any problems.
Mateusz has studied 450 brains,
and he's now finally got
enough to draw a conclusion.
So we find two main differences
between problematic pornography users
and regular users.
One is related to the reward circuit,
and it becomes super sensitive
for all the triggers related
to pornography watching.
The second one is related
to lower ability to
control your behaviour
and this is linked
to less grey matter volume
in the prefrontal cortex,
that's this part of the brain.
When we compare problematic
pornography users
with alcohol addicts and gamblers,
the little spots in
the prefrontal cortex
are the places where there
is less grey matter volume,
responsible for the
controlling of those cravings.
The scientists say we should
all have 40% grey matter,
but heavy porn users have less.
This is the information processing
all thinking part of our brain.
Less grey matter is
associated with addiction.
It's not just a matter
of your weak will.
Uh, this is a real issue.
There are real changes in your brain
and this is similar
to what we've already
seen in other addictions.
Problematic porn use is now classified
by the World Health Organisation
as a clinical condition.
That means people have
better access to treatment,
like antidepressants and psychotherapy.
It's very difficult to quit porn
once you develop this
pattern of problematic use,
but there's hope.
So what we see in people
who are in treatment
is that after a few months
of abstaining from porn,
those changes in the brain reverse.
This is a real change in the brain,
the restoration of normal function.
So, the good news is that
your brain can bounce back.
I'm back in horny
porny Spainy Barcelona.
- I love those ideas.
- I know.
I'm pitching my sexily
ethical ideas to Erika Lust.
Don't worry monarchy fans.
Getting down with the Crown is out,
but shagadelica is in.
The thing about my fantasies
is that I feel like exploring
time periods and group sex.
I've always been obsessed
with the '60s and '70s.
The way everything looked,
but also the sexual revolution.
How everyone was so open and free,
and it's an exciting time for that.
You know 1969 swingers,
body sex, that kind of thing.
Group sex, voyeurism, exhibitionism.
Just, yeah, good
old-fashioned love-making.
So you're thinking like
a sex party kind of thing?
- Okay. Like a big orgy?
- Yes, an orgy.
And we should find some good
music to get that kind of ambience.
- Is it a female or mixed?
- I think everyone.
The idea of taking it outside
the conventional standard
of what sex is, right?
And then, of course, we
want to represent diversity.
- Yes.
- We want different kinds of people.
- Yes.
- Yeah.
But is there something
that you find as a turn on?
- I just want it to be good.
- Yeah, well.
- You put us up with a challenge.
- I'm excited.
- Okay, we're making it.
- Yay!
- Go.
- Okay, bye.
What kind of porn do you
wish there was more of?
For me, I think that
porn is really lacking
in the female voice
or at least different
voices, different points of view.
So much porn, but so much of
it is on the same narrative.
Even the lesbian porn that's made,
it's clearly directed by a man for men.
It's very confusing.
You know, now if I watch
porn, which I very rarely do,
I would rather watch amateur
porn and real people having sex
than the porn made at the moment.
You really want to see real
pleasure and real intimacy.
Otherwise, it's just this kind
of very staged contrived version
of what love or intimacy
should look like.
Manhattan home to
another pioneering woman
offering an alternative to
the mainstream porn industry,
swapping all the dodgy stuff
You had them in your hand!
to focus on what's really
Oh, my God, no. Oh, my God!
well, real.
Real world sex is way more innovative,
way more surprising
and way more arousing
than porn will ever be.
This is love, real sexy love.
MakeLoveNotPorn is a
subscription video platform
launched by the
entrepreneur Cindy Gallop.
We exist to reflect
the full glorious spectrum
of human sexuality.
I am obsessed with where you live.
Okay, cool, we have to concentrate.
Down to business, though.
Can you just give me a little
taste of what MakeLoveNotPorn is?
We are the world's first and only,
user-generated, human-curated,
social sex video showing platform.
Real world sex is enormously reassuring.
We celebrate real world everything.
Real world bodies,
real world penis size,
real world vulvas.
Bloody love this woman!
If porn is the Hollywood
blockbuster movie,
MakeLoveNotPorn is the
real world documentary.
Can you just tell
everyone how you started?
Basically, MakeLoveNotPorn
came about because I date younger men
casually recreationally for sex.
And I'm deliberately very
vocal about all of that
because I realised I was
experiencing what happens
when today's total freedom of
access to hardcore porn online
meets our society's
equally total reluctance
to talk openly and honestly about sex.
When those two things converge,
porn becomes sex education
by default, in not a good way.
So I found myself encountering
a number of sexual behaviours in bed,
and went, "Whoa! I know
where that's coming from."
I thought, "Gosh, if
I'm experiencing this,
other people must be as well."
And I realised I'd uncovered
a huge global social issue.
So, this video is
by MakeLoveNotPornstar Goddess Erica,
and this video is them tantric kissing.
- So I'll sign it over.
- That's fantastic.
So sweet.
It's also just very soothing to watch.
You know, it's
They're just hugging. It's great.
We get really excited
when we can expand the
definition of real world sex
on MakeLoveNotPorn.
So tantric kissing was something
we hadn't had until this video,
which was really exciting.
This isn't making me horny.
Even though it's not,
not making me horny,
it's making me more horny for intimacy.
- Yeah, exactly.
- You know, like, craving
to be touched or held or caressed.
Yeah.
There's so many of my
friends who are like,
"But there's not dick involved.
There's no real penetration."
It's just so backwards
about what people believe.
Cindy's platform is
ethical, real and raunchy.
But here's the tricky bit.
You've got to pay for it.
And a lot of people want
to get their kicks for free,
which means they're going
to turn to the usual,
maybe less than ethical
suspects for their porn.
So what to do?
Justine Ang Fonte has a tough job.
She teaches Porn
Literacy to young people.
In a nutshell, how to think
critically about mainstream porn
that requires one or two
clicks and no subscriptions.
As a health educator
working in a school setting,
we're seeing young people
being exposed to pornography
as young as eight years old.
So, Cara, what was your
first experience with porn?
You know, for me, it was, like,
I'm a little kid who's already
done, feeling they belong.
I didn't know whether I was queer
or gender fluid, I didn't know.
So the whole thing was confusing.
I've been teaching pornography
literacy for nine years.
It's a lot about safety.
It's about looking at
what they might be seeing
is not accurate.
This is an entertainment industry
and not something that is meant
to define me or explain who I am.
I started watching porn
when I was really young.
That's how I was introduced to sex.
- Yeah. How old?
- Around 11 or 12.
It definitely made me
feel like I have to be thin
and have big boobs and be
shaved, like, everywhere.
I was, like, 14 or so.
I know I'm gay, and
Okay, lesbian porn,
and that was a mistake.
It didn't have a kind
of sense of pleasure
for anyone who didn't have a dick.
I didn't like lesbian porn.
When I look at a woman like that,
that's not what I was either.
Teaching pornography
literacy in schools,
do you all even think
it should be in schools?
- Everyone has Sex Ed?
- No.
- Every school doesn't do Sex Ed?
- No.
Even schools that are teaching this
are not necessarily
bringing up pornography.
They're talking about how
to prevent getting pregnant,
how to not contract an infection.
A lot of my students are
using mainstream pornography
as the main instruction
manual that is normalising
the lack of consent,
the lack of intimacy.
So that's extremely destructive.
I think porn was created
to be a wildly inaccurate
fantasy of our sexuality,
and we are meant to consume it as such.
Honestly, it is wild we
are not teaching Sex Ed
in so many American schools.
Let alone Porn Literacy.
We need to help young people understand
that this shit is not real.
I think a lot of teenage boys think
they'll be a pizza delivery boy
and they'll just go to a house one day,
and then a girl will them randomly.
That's just not going to
happen. I can't say Shit
Porn has definitely skewed all
of our visions of what sex is,
but especially for poor
young boys that don't know.
And their parents and their teachers
won't speak to them about sex.
That's all they know.
I think the whole porn industry
needs to just take a step up
and go up a level because
porn should be educational.
And at the moment it's
just educating people
in the exact opposite way.
It's just now becoming something
that is a dangerous thing
that we can't stop kids from watching,
and it's changing how
the world looks at sex.
Porn shoot scene, part four.
Ready?
What are we doing today?
We are on the way, back in Barcelona,
to watch Erika direct the porn film
that's loosely based on my fantasies.
So I'm very excited.
A little bit nervous.
When you were thinking about
the kind of the '60s and
was it something like
this you had imagined?
No, the details are wonderful.
From my wildest dreams.
- It is really pretty. I love it.
- What are you doing right now?
Well, I'm preparing next
to where we actually get
to know the performers.
Now I know that Erika's films
are all about inclusivity,
respect, consensual sex, etc.
But this next bit, I honestly
could not have imagined.
A consent chat with the
cast that's on camera.
An actual part of the film.
Done, okay. And action!
This is a talk about your
personal sex boundaries.
Visha, what do you think?
My back is actually
quite a sensitive space,
but, like, impact play is actually fine.
I'm truly into giving,
so, like, blow jobs, rimming,
but I'm also open to receiving.
Other than that, like, I'm easy.
Great, thank you. Nat, how do you feel?
I would be happy to receive everything
besides no spit on the face.
- Oh, yeah.
- Right?
I'm pretty easy with almost everything
minus anal sex and
playing with my nipples.
They are too sensitive to the touch.
And I also would like to know
what is it that brings
you all to orgasm?
Okay, well, then in that
case, play with my balls.
Lick them, suck them, play with them.
- That will help me.
- Gotcha.
Orgasm, balls.
If you feel that something
is not going the way you want,
please, communicate it.
Well, good luck to everyone
and let's have a great party.
Thank you and cut!
When they were having the
kind of HR consent chat,
I assumed it to be a very boring talk
about what's going to happen on set
and, like, the way people
speak to each other.
But it comes from a place
of more like what each
person's preferences are,
what their limits are, what
makes them reach an orgasm,
what makes them comfortable
or uncomfortable.
It's very nice, especially hear
them talking about it in that way.
It made me very happy.
I love this because this goes
with this one and with your hair,
and it kind of makes the
whole statement, I think.
- James Bond.
- James Bond. My Bond girl.
I want to talk to the performers
about how Erika's gigs compare
to the mainstream stuff.
- Exactly.
- Does it make a difference if ?
You're less nervous if you
talk about this stuff before?
Yeah, I find it easier
when I know what are people's
boundaries and preferences.
When you work with mainstream producers,
first of all, well,
it's super different.
You have the sex scripted,
so you know the positions you
are going to do and everything.
- Oh, no.
- Yeah. They want 5 minutes of this,
5 minutes of this, 5 minutes of this.
- Oh, my God, it's so specific.
- Yeah, it's disgusting, yeah.
With this type of company,
it's, like, sure that everyone
knows what's happening.
- Here.
- We're almost ready now.
Tassels twirl. Cocktails swirl.
Sex party porno time is about to begin.
I'm fascinated to see how this'll work
because I just don't really know.
And you just dive in
the deep end, I guess.
We need to see the nipple tassels move.
Yeah, after filming sex personally,
there's never all
angles of sex aren't good.
- Right?
- Not all, not so good.
- They're not.
- Not everything is gorgeous.
No, not everything is
stunning, I'm just saying.
Do you give directions
when they're having sex?
No, not that much. I
give directions before.
We're gonna talk about the light
and the best angles and places.
But then, when we start,
we let it kind of run.
That's amazing.
Just the average general conversations
are about don't squirt on the sofa or
Okay, let's do it!
Music, dancing, action.
Good! Yes!
Sexy!
Yes.
That looks great.
What I'm trying to do in my
films is really showing how women
are active working
for their own pleasure,
communicating with their partners,
talking about consent
and how they are having
pleasure ultimately together.
Telling them not to have
sex as porn performers,
but to have sex in a more normal way.
- That is a wrap! We have a wrap!
- Whoo!
So ends my time with Lady Lust and team.
Always good to go out with a bang.
Thank you!
- It wasn't that strange, was it?
- Not at all.
Sex is way more scary.
Visha! Let's do a selfie.
- Hello, darling.
- All right, love.
There's just such a world of difference
between the films that Erika produces
and the worst kinds of mainstream porn.
There's boundaries, respect and care.
No one's exploited,
and everyone's included.
I came in kind of, like,
"Why would you pay for porn?"
You pay for an experience. You
pay for the safety of others.
It was just thoroughly enjoyable
because they got comfortable.
You could see them enjoying themselves.
And that's what you pay for.
You pay for the realness.
But you also know that
they're gonna be treated right,
and that's important 'cause
you get attached to them all.
I was like, "Yeah, go, come, whoo!"
I don't know, it was amazing.
I'm like, "Girl, you get it!"
I want to high five all
of them. It was wonderful.
I think that the best thing
that people could really do
is to pay for their porn
and support creators and performers.
That's how you make a
difference in the world.
Not all porn is the same.
I was just very happy to see sex
being represented in a way
that I knew it was in real life.
If I had seen that kind of porn
when I was a teenager or kid,
I would've felt more respected
and asked for what I
wanted as a woman more.
The first time I asked a
man for what I wanted in bed
was this year, and I'm 29
years old. Like, that's insane.
Porn is problematic,
but it's not the problem.
Instead of blaming porn,
which is what we're doing,
we're not taking porn and
changing the narrative.
There is a healthy way that
porn can be made and watched,
ranging from, like, amateur porn,
Cindy Gallop, MakeLoveNotPorn,
or Erika Lust, an ethical feminist,
but more equality type porn.
But the problem is, we're
shoved so much of this tube porn
and the quantity of it down our throats,
you can't see anything else.
But there is so much
more out there to explore.
Like sexuality, you should
explore porn just the same.
- That's a banger!
- That's a banger!
- Yes?
- We are ready.
Nat, how do you feel?
I would like to know what is it
that brings you all to orgasm.
Well, then in that
case, play with my balls.
Lick them, suck them, play with them.
That would help me. Orgasm, balls.
Good luck to everyone, and
let's have a great party.
The porn industry is
estimated to be worth
up to a whopping $100
billion dollars a year,
with more web traffic
than Netflix, Amazon and Hulu combined.
I'm about to dig into
the real impact of porn.
I know, some of it's gross.
Like, this is really mad.
And some of it downright nasty!
- Oh.
- This is horrible.
But is there an alternative?
Hi!
They're just hugging. It's great.
Is there such a thing as good porn?
Yeah, go, come, whoo!
Look, we can't show you
all the naughty bits,
but I guarantee you're
still in for a saucy time.
- Thank you so much!
- Thank you!
Porn.
All right, come on,
let's talk about porn.
So, what exactly is pornography?
Well, it's anything with sexual content
designed to turn you on.
And today there is a lot of it.
Oh, okay.
Everyday there are hundreds
of millions of visits
to porn sites across the world.
With most people watching
it on their mobiles,
porn is now more accessible than ever,
which means you can watch it
anywhere, anytime, all the time.
Guys do you want some pizza?
But this frothy fantasy of
cheerleaders and pool boys
is a long way from the dark
reality of how porn makes me feel.
I started watching porn pretty young
and couldn't really come without
it for a long period of time.
And it wasn't until
a couple of years ago
when I started trying
to masturbate without it
and it was hard. Without a sex toy too.
Porn is quite intense, and
I think it can be quite scary
when it gives young
people a very skewed way
of how sex should be and
what intimacy should be.
I've seen a lot of porn
that taps into our worst
most basic instincts.
And banning it won't make it go away.
It's really gross 'cause
even after you watch it,
you're, like, "I feel disgusting."
So is porn inherently bad, or
is it possible to make good porn?
Barcelona, porn capital of Europe.
I've heard that amongst the
many porn producers here,
there's one fighting to change
the industry for the better.
And action!
Erika Lust creates films
that are radically different
to the free easily accessible stuff
you find on most porn websites.
She takes a totally ethical approach.
There's a whole indie movement, really.
Smaller production companies of
directors, producers, performers,
who are trying to make
a different kind of porn,
a porn that is respecting people.
- Plan B.
- So, we're on set, right?
So, in terms of the porn you
make, why did you end up doing that
and what was it about mainstream porn
that is a problem?
It's the whole kind of system, I think.
I think most of the people making
it are the same kind of men,
the kind of middle-aged,
white, cis, hetero guy,
and it's his version
of porn that we see.
And I'm so tired of
all this kind of videos
talking about banging,
smashing, needling.
- Pounding. Screwing.
- Punish
When you watch women having
sex with these men or whatever,
you can tell they're not
turned on. It's crazy.
With mainstream porn today,
there's one big company.
They're based in Montreal, Canada.
They are the leader in this industry.
They are what we could call "Big Porn."
They are not interested
in human sexuality.
It's all about traffic,
nasty, dirty, ugly as possible
to earn money.
So I wanted to show you a few clips,
to look a little about, you
know, what's wrong with porn.
A few examples of online
sites. So, here what do we see?
We see two big men, and
we see a very young girl.
- She looks so young.
- If we read the tagline, it says,
"Tiny teen destroyed by
two giant black dudes."
And this is an example of
so many things that's wrong.
The racialisation
also of the characters,
and she obviously looks
much less than 18 years old.
- Like, this is really bad.
- It's really bad that it's accepted.
So gross!
Here's another really good example.
This is about "Lesbian beauty
tries her first cock and loves it."
And what is this about?
Well, this is about the idea
that no woman could really be a lesbian
because most women,
if they just try cock,
that's what they want.
- You think she's really a lesbian?
- I don't think so.
So many of my straight
girlfriends watch lesbian porn.
That's their favourite one to watch
because it's safer, but I'm like,
"It's not really lesbians
either. It's not really anything."
And again, "Teen slut
used by the whole dorm."
Look at the language.
This is There's no end to it.
And then I have an example that
you're not gonna like at all.
Deep fake. They put your
face on another person's body.
- Let's see if it
- Oh!
This is horrible.
- Have you seen this?
- No, I haven't seen that.
That is honestly very shocking to see.
One of the reasons why I'm doing it
is because I want to
change porn culture.
I've also seen how this
independent movement around porn
has grown since I started.
I never even considered or thought
there was female directors in porn.
Yeah, and you know what? My audience.
Around 60% of the audience are men,
and I really believe that
if we want to change porn,
we can't continue just
accepting what's out there.
What I'm trying to do in my films
is to bring more women
into adult filmmaking
because that's the only
way we're going to be able
to see the perspective shift.
So for me the answer is
really, let's make better porn.
What she showed me was
yeah, really horrifying.
I didn't understand the extent
of what we were discussing
in terms of what is there
available to people for free,
which makes me believe in
what she does even more so.
Don't normalise that
thought. It's not okay.
Erika's got me so fired up
about making better porn,
that I'm going to work with her
to turn my wildest
fantasies into a new film.
All's fair, I guess, on Planet Sex.
I was completely desensitised
by the porn I'd watched.
In my mind, the dangerous part,
it's a lot of female objectification.
That's when it got dangerous for
me, but that's what excited me.
I speak to a lot of women,
and they have the same feeling.
And it's horrible. There's so
much shame involved in that.
You can't ever unsee any of that stuff.
There's a lot of weird
shit in the world.
And lots of that extreme
stuff is found here, Japan.
Look, I love this country so much,
but when it comes to
erotic depictions of women,
oh, dear, it can be
pretty dark and degrading.
Akihabara shopping district
is the beating heart of
Japan's manga industry.
We're not allowed to film in here,
but I'm going to take
a look, buy some stuff,
and I'll see you in a minute.
I'm sensing two main themes here.
An obsession with
wildly oversized breasts
and the sexualisation of school girls.
And both creep me out.
Whoa! Like, this image is crazy.
Oh, my God, I've just
realised what's happening.
There's a lot of, like, come everywhere.
Like, why are her nipples
constantly squirting milk?
I hope they are drinking water
because there's so much fluid.
Oh, God!
Let's be real.
This is by straight
men for straight men.
But I've been told there's
an erotic manga subculture
that's way more appealing
to women and less degrading.
Boys Love or BL
is a work written for women
which depicts male-on-male
sexual love or strong bonds.
Stay with me here.
Yes, Boys Love is gay sex between men,
but drawn by and aimed at women.
So, I was very fascinated
when I heard the opposite of
what the male comic books are,
was two gay men.
How is it so different in Boys Love?
The form of a boy is an ideal,
free from the constraints of gender.
The boy represents an
alter ego for a girl.
They are both giving
pleasure at the same time.
You can be emotionally involved
in both of them at the same time.
It's very interesting that
mostly women like Boys Love.
Why do you think it's
important that women see men
in a portrayal where they show emotions?
So, the sexual pleasure in Boys Love
is similar to female pleasure.
But it is portrayed as a
man's feelings, in a male form.
I think that is why it's so attractive.
There's not a lot of
freedom, especially for women.
By removing that restriction,
by having two men,
you can depict a love affair
between two people who
have removed their chains.
Women are so often
depicted as just taking it,
but in Boys Love, the
sex is between two people
who are passionate about
giving and receiving pleasure.
Obviously, BL has a
really positive influence.
Do you hope it reaches a wider audience?
And what do you think it teaches people?
BL culture is already
spreading around the world
and that leads to support
for real gay people.
In that sense, Boys
Love is very freeing.
It can shine a light on relationships
we couldn't name before.
The thing that surprised me the most
is that I just didn't
know Boys Love existed,
in terms of a comic book that's sexual
but about the emotions and feelings,
more like a kind of, like, a
romantic erotic novel, let's say.
And I kind of wish
there was a middle ground
that straight men could be
into that wasn't so sexual.
We can draw anime.
We need more stuff like
Japan's Boys Love comics.
Sexy stories that reflect
the full range of
human sexual experience,
not just what straight men want.
- Are we on now?
- We're on, ready to rock and roll.
I've had some hot ideas for a film,
and want to run them by Erika Lust.
What are you thinking about?
Your own stories, your fantasies?
The things that I find extremely sexy
are the forbidden,
like English repression,
in terms of sexuality.
I remember watching The Crown
because I thought the Royal Family
and how repressed they were was
the hottest thing in the world.
I'm English. That shit is hot.
- Get me going.
- No, but
It's something that people
are looking for more lately.
- The Bridgerton porn kind of style.
- See?
Okay, all the best. I
cannot wait to work with you.
It's going to be amazing.
Thank you so much.
I realise that not all
porn is problematic.
Erika's ethical feminist films
and Japan's Boys Love erotica
give me hope that there's
positive stuff out there too.
In fact, sometimes it can
even be kind of meaningful.
Should I have the glasses on or off?
I think off.
Deutschland mit Gandalf.
- Willkommen Berlin.
- Danke.
This not too shabby Trabi.
It's a beautiful car.
I mean, I love it.
It's It's very cool.
Will be dropping me at the
Schwules, or gay, Museum.
It looks pretty ordinary,
but this place owns
the biggest gay porn
stash in all the land.
More than a million items.
Straight in at the deep
end with Peter Rehberg.
- Wow, his penis is very large.
- Yeah, big dicks.
Yeah, large penises.
I'm hot again. Whoo! Yeah.
Jokes aside, Peter
knows that porn matters.
To have queer sexuality
represented in porn
is important for queer people.
You have very little representation
of queer people in mainstream
media to begin with.
Porn is a very central
moment of gay culture
because through porn you
have access to a gay universe,
the sense of belonging.
So, here this is the magazine section.
Playgirl, Playguy.
It's like an encyclopaedia
of everything.
And if we go over here,
we're approaching the porn collection.
Whoa! Now we're talking.
As you can see, many VHS tapes.
Wow! The Pizza Boy Two.
Oh, my God, there's a
lot of dicks and arses.
- Not a lot of women back here.
- No, it's not.
The majority is gay male porn, yes.
Most of this is commercial
porn from the '80s and '90s,
an important era of gay
porn, you know, post Aids.
I never thought how affirming it must be
to see your own gay sexuality
reflected back at you.
To Peter, this stuff
is real life history.
This is a Safer Sex porn
film produced in '89,
by a German director, Wieland Speck.
So, the idea here is that everybody
pretended there were no condoms,
you know, so you saw people
kissing, and then it came to the
And, suddenly, the guy had a condom on.
So he decided, "We try to
promote the use of condoms."
- Should we look at it?
- Yes.
Okay, let's move over.
So, here we go.
Look, it gives you instruction
of how to use a condom.
- "Gummi."
- It's a German word for rubber.
So the idea is to make
using a condom sexy.
Pornography has an
important educational value.
You, as a queer teenager,
if you watch porn,
no one is telling you how
queer sex works, right?
Finding out what your fantasies are.
What is happening here?
Why is he so bad at this?
- I don't know.
- Why is there so much ?
I've never seen that done before.
Oh, my God!
- That guy's thrilled.
- Yeah.
I think that the porn
collection is important
if you want to get
a comprehensive sense of queer culture.
Let's just say there's no
queer culture without porn.
I love Peter.
I want to go to dinner with
Peter and talk about porn.
To be honest, I didn't realise
how little I knew about porn,
and especially not queer porn.
They are drag queens. They
are beating up the skinheads.
I've never done anything like
this, so it's been really amazing.
- I love Berlin!
- Yeah! That's a wrap for Berlin!
- Thank you!
- Love you, guys.
Porn is something that, you know,
should be able to be
used, but should be made
from different cultures
and different viewpoints,
and instead it's made from
this very dominant male
objectifying viewpoint, in
my mind, most of the time.
So I'd like to see more diversity
in the people that write the porn,
the people that direct the porn,
the people that are in the porn.
I just want it to be real.
The problem with mainstream porn
is that it's a million miles away
from most people's real
lived experiences of sex.
Yet, the stats tell us
we are all consuming ever
increasing quantities.
So is there something
worse happening here?
Is porn actually addictive?
I was always searching
for the perfect clip,
and that perfect clip
didn't seem to exist.
I'm in LA, trying to get centred
in the company of Erica Garza.
She's a former porn addict
with a hellish tale to tell.
So, when I was 12,
I was diagnosed with
scoliosis, and so I had to wear
this big clunky back
brace under my shirts.
And I became really
introverted and insecure,
hating my body, and just really isolated
and filled with
self-loathing and self-hatred.
I found that if I masturbated,
I would get a break from
all of those bad feelings.
I would use porn as an escape from that.
When did you realise it was a problem?
I knew it was an addiction
because it was a compulsion
that I felt like I had no control over.
Just trying to continue
that sense of gratification.
You know, get turned
on, find a sexual release
and then start all over again.
Yeah, there were things in
there you just said that, um
yeah, I can definitely identify with.
You don't really realise
what an escape it is.
How did you turn the corner?
What did you do to find
that freedom to change?
I had ruined another relationship.
And I saw my 30 years ahead of me,
and I thought, "I want to
make this decade better."
I saw it as a turning point for me.
I started doing lots of
yoga, I started meditating,
and just taking care of myself.
That was a huge part of my healing.
That's when I started writing about it,
going to 12-step meetings and
starting to be open about this.
What a turnaround, but
what an amazing thing
to have accomplished,
especially being so brave
to be vulnerable about talking,
putting yourself out there like that.
When you're dealing with
something like addiction
and when you keep these things a secret,
it only intensifies the shame.
If you speak about these things
and you expose these secrets,
then you disempower them.
Yes.
Porn can definitely be an escape.
It's something that you
reach for to help you
and what you need or you rely on.
But the most interesting part is,
I very much related to
a lot of what she said,
the kind of porn she watched,
the relationships getting in the way of,
the feeling alone, the feeling isolated.
I related to all of it and was
like, "Wow, was I addicted to porn?"
I wouldn't watch it everyday, for sure.
I wouldn't need to
have an orgasm everyday,
but I needed to watch it to have one.
So, yeah, I mean, that's in its way
its own little addiction to porn.
Both Erica and I have certainly fallen
under the spell of mainstream porn.
But is it a real
addiction in the same way
as, say, gambling or alcoholism?
Not everyone believes so,
but new research is making
scientists think again.
The University of California, San Diego,
is the site of some hardcore research
into our darkest desires.
This guy spends a lot of time
thinking about, writing
about and looking at porn.
To be fair, at least he's got an excuse.
In my research, I try to understand
how the pornography
changes brain activity
and what we can do to help people quit.
For him, there's one question
more important than any other,
"Can you really get addicted to porn?"
For the majority of
people, pornography watching
is just an entertainment,
but the problem appears
when you cannot control
when do you watch,
how long do you watch and
when do you finish watching.
The average age of patients
we've seen in treatment
is around 27.
So usually they have
been watching pornography
already for about 15, 17
years up to 15 hours a day.
Mateusz believes answers might
lie in the structure of our brains.
So he takes heavy porn users
and sticks them in a scanner.
In our studies, we are using FMRI,
which allows us to compare the brains
of people who struggle with
problematic pornography use
with those who use porn, but
never experience any problems.
Mateusz has studied 450 brains,
and he's now finally got
enough to draw a conclusion.
So we find two main differences
between problematic pornography users
and regular users.
One is related to the reward circuit,
and it becomes super sensitive
for all the triggers related
to pornography watching.
The second one is related
to lower ability to
control your behaviour
and this is linked
to less grey matter volume
in the prefrontal cortex,
that's this part of the brain.
When we compare problematic
pornography users
with alcohol addicts and gamblers,
the little spots in
the prefrontal cortex
are the places where there
is less grey matter volume,
responsible for the
controlling of those cravings.
The scientists say we should
all have 40% grey matter,
but heavy porn users have less.
This is the information processing
all thinking part of our brain.
Less grey matter is
associated with addiction.
It's not just a matter
of your weak will.
Uh, this is a real issue.
There are real changes in your brain
and this is similar
to what we've already
seen in other addictions.
Problematic porn use is now classified
by the World Health Organisation
as a clinical condition.
That means people have
better access to treatment,
like antidepressants and psychotherapy.
It's very difficult to quit porn
once you develop this
pattern of problematic use,
but there's hope.
So what we see in people
who are in treatment
is that after a few months
of abstaining from porn,
those changes in the brain reverse.
This is a real change in the brain,
the restoration of normal function.
So, the good news is that
your brain can bounce back.
I'm back in horny
porny Spainy Barcelona.
- I love those ideas.
- I know.
I'm pitching my sexily
ethical ideas to Erika Lust.
Don't worry monarchy fans.
Getting down with the Crown is out,
but shagadelica is in.
The thing about my fantasies
is that I feel like exploring
time periods and group sex.
I've always been obsessed
with the '60s and '70s.
The way everything looked,
but also the sexual revolution.
How everyone was so open and free,
and it's an exciting time for that.
You know 1969 swingers,
body sex, that kind of thing.
Group sex, voyeurism, exhibitionism.
Just, yeah, good
old-fashioned love-making.
So you're thinking like
a sex party kind of thing?
- Okay. Like a big orgy?
- Yes, an orgy.
And we should find some good
music to get that kind of ambience.
- Is it a female or mixed?
- I think everyone.
The idea of taking it outside
the conventional standard
of what sex is, right?
And then, of course, we
want to represent diversity.
- Yes.
- We want different kinds of people.
- Yes.
- Yeah.
But is there something
that you find as a turn on?
- I just want it to be good.
- Yeah, well.
- You put us up with a challenge.
- I'm excited.
- Okay, we're making it.
- Yay!
- Go.
- Okay, bye.
What kind of porn do you
wish there was more of?
For me, I think that
porn is really lacking
in the female voice
or at least different
voices, different points of view.
So much porn, but so much of
it is on the same narrative.
Even the lesbian porn that's made,
it's clearly directed by a man for men.
It's very confusing.
You know, now if I watch
porn, which I very rarely do,
I would rather watch amateur
porn and real people having sex
than the porn made at the moment.
You really want to see real
pleasure and real intimacy.
Otherwise, it's just this kind
of very staged contrived version
of what love or intimacy
should look like.
Manhattan home to
another pioneering woman
offering an alternative to
the mainstream porn industry,
swapping all the dodgy stuff
You had them in your hand!
to focus on what's really
Oh, my God, no. Oh, my God!
well, real.
Real world sex is way more innovative,
way more surprising
and way more arousing
than porn will ever be.
This is love, real sexy love.
MakeLoveNotPorn is a
subscription video platform
launched by the
entrepreneur Cindy Gallop.
We exist to reflect
the full glorious spectrum
of human sexuality.
I am obsessed with where you live.
Okay, cool, we have to concentrate.
Down to business, though.
Can you just give me a little
taste of what MakeLoveNotPorn is?
We are the world's first and only,
user-generated, human-curated,
social sex video showing platform.
Real world sex is enormously reassuring.
We celebrate real world everything.
Real world bodies,
real world penis size,
real world vulvas.
Bloody love this woman!
If porn is the Hollywood
blockbuster movie,
MakeLoveNotPorn is the
real world documentary.
Can you just tell
everyone how you started?
Basically, MakeLoveNotPorn
came about because I date younger men
casually recreationally for sex.
And I'm deliberately very
vocal about all of that
because I realised I was
experiencing what happens
when today's total freedom of
access to hardcore porn online
meets our society's
equally total reluctance
to talk openly and honestly about sex.
When those two things converge,
porn becomes sex education
by default, in not a good way.
So I found myself encountering
a number of sexual behaviours in bed,
and went, "Whoa! I know
where that's coming from."
I thought, "Gosh, if
I'm experiencing this,
other people must be as well."
And I realised I'd uncovered
a huge global social issue.
So, this video is
by MakeLoveNotPornstar Goddess Erica,
and this video is them tantric kissing.
- So I'll sign it over.
- That's fantastic.
So sweet.
It's also just very soothing to watch.
You know, it's
They're just hugging. It's great.
We get really excited
when we can expand the
definition of real world sex
on MakeLoveNotPorn.
So tantric kissing was something
we hadn't had until this video,
which was really exciting.
This isn't making me horny.
Even though it's not,
not making me horny,
it's making me more horny for intimacy.
- Yeah, exactly.
- You know, like, craving
to be touched or held or caressed.
Yeah.
There's so many of my
friends who are like,
"But there's not dick involved.
There's no real penetration."
It's just so backwards
about what people believe.
Cindy's platform is
ethical, real and raunchy.
But here's the tricky bit.
You've got to pay for it.
And a lot of people want
to get their kicks for free,
which means they're going
to turn to the usual,
maybe less than ethical
suspects for their porn.
So what to do?
Justine Ang Fonte has a tough job.
She teaches Porn
Literacy to young people.
In a nutshell, how to think
critically about mainstream porn
that requires one or two
clicks and no subscriptions.
As a health educator
working in a school setting,
we're seeing young people
being exposed to pornography
as young as eight years old.
So, Cara, what was your
first experience with porn?
You know, for me, it was, like,
I'm a little kid who's already
done, feeling they belong.
I didn't know whether I was queer
or gender fluid, I didn't know.
So the whole thing was confusing.
I've been teaching pornography
literacy for nine years.
It's a lot about safety.
It's about looking at
what they might be seeing
is not accurate.
This is an entertainment industry
and not something that is meant
to define me or explain who I am.
I started watching porn
when I was really young.
That's how I was introduced to sex.
- Yeah. How old?
- Around 11 or 12.
It definitely made me
feel like I have to be thin
and have big boobs and be
shaved, like, everywhere.
I was, like, 14 or so.
I know I'm gay, and
Okay, lesbian porn,
and that was a mistake.
It didn't have a kind
of sense of pleasure
for anyone who didn't have a dick.
I didn't like lesbian porn.
When I look at a woman like that,
that's not what I was either.
Teaching pornography
literacy in schools,
do you all even think
it should be in schools?
- Everyone has Sex Ed?
- No.
- Every school doesn't do Sex Ed?
- No.
Even schools that are teaching this
are not necessarily
bringing up pornography.
They're talking about how
to prevent getting pregnant,
how to not contract an infection.
A lot of my students are
using mainstream pornography
as the main instruction
manual that is normalising
the lack of consent,
the lack of intimacy.
So that's extremely destructive.
I think porn was created
to be a wildly inaccurate
fantasy of our sexuality,
and we are meant to consume it as such.
Honestly, it is wild we
are not teaching Sex Ed
in so many American schools.
Let alone Porn Literacy.
We need to help young people understand
that this shit is not real.
I think a lot of teenage boys think
they'll be a pizza delivery boy
and they'll just go to a house one day,
and then a girl will them randomly.
That's just not going to
happen. I can't say Shit
Porn has definitely skewed all
of our visions of what sex is,
but especially for poor
young boys that don't know.
And their parents and their teachers
won't speak to them about sex.
That's all they know.
I think the whole porn industry
needs to just take a step up
and go up a level because
porn should be educational.
And at the moment it's
just educating people
in the exact opposite way.
It's just now becoming something
that is a dangerous thing
that we can't stop kids from watching,
and it's changing how
the world looks at sex.
Porn shoot scene, part four.
Ready?
What are we doing today?
We are on the way, back in Barcelona,
to watch Erika direct the porn film
that's loosely based on my fantasies.
So I'm very excited.
A little bit nervous.
When you were thinking about
the kind of the '60s and
was it something like
this you had imagined?
No, the details are wonderful.
From my wildest dreams.
- It is really pretty. I love it.
- What are you doing right now?
Well, I'm preparing next
to where we actually get
to know the performers.
Now I know that Erika's films
are all about inclusivity,
respect, consensual sex, etc.
But this next bit, I honestly
could not have imagined.
A consent chat with the
cast that's on camera.
An actual part of the film.
Done, okay. And action!
This is a talk about your
personal sex boundaries.
Visha, what do you think?
My back is actually
quite a sensitive space,
but, like, impact play is actually fine.
I'm truly into giving,
so, like, blow jobs, rimming,
but I'm also open to receiving.
Other than that, like, I'm easy.
Great, thank you. Nat, how do you feel?
I would be happy to receive everything
besides no spit on the face.
- Oh, yeah.
- Right?
I'm pretty easy with almost everything
minus anal sex and
playing with my nipples.
They are too sensitive to the touch.
And I also would like to know
what is it that brings
you all to orgasm?
Okay, well, then in that
case, play with my balls.
Lick them, suck them, play with them.
- That will help me.
- Gotcha.
Orgasm, balls.
If you feel that something
is not going the way you want,
please, communicate it.
Well, good luck to everyone
and let's have a great party.
Thank you and cut!
When they were having the
kind of HR consent chat,
I assumed it to be a very boring talk
about what's going to happen on set
and, like, the way people
speak to each other.
But it comes from a place
of more like what each
person's preferences are,
what their limits are, what
makes them reach an orgasm,
what makes them comfortable
or uncomfortable.
It's very nice, especially hear
them talking about it in that way.
It made me very happy.
I love this because this goes
with this one and with your hair,
and it kind of makes the
whole statement, I think.
- James Bond.
- James Bond. My Bond girl.
I want to talk to the performers
about how Erika's gigs compare
to the mainstream stuff.
- Exactly.
- Does it make a difference if ?
You're less nervous if you
talk about this stuff before?
Yeah, I find it easier
when I know what are people's
boundaries and preferences.
When you work with mainstream producers,
first of all, well,
it's super different.
You have the sex scripted,
so you know the positions you
are going to do and everything.
- Oh, no.
- Yeah. They want 5 minutes of this,
5 minutes of this, 5 minutes of this.
- Oh, my God, it's so specific.
- Yeah, it's disgusting, yeah.
With this type of company,
it's, like, sure that everyone
knows what's happening.
- Here.
- We're almost ready now.
Tassels twirl. Cocktails swirl.
Sex party porno time is about to begin.
I'm fascinated to see how this'll work
because I just don't really know.
And you just dive in
the deep end, I guess.
We need to see the nipple tassels move.
Yeah, after filming sex personally,
there's never all
angles of sex aren't good.
- Right?
- Not all, not so good.
- They're not.
- Not everything is gorgeous.
No, not everything is
stunning, I'm just saying.
Do you give directions
when they're having sex?
No, not that much. I
give directions before.
We're gonna talk about the light
and the best angles and places.
But then, when we start,
we let it kind of run.
That's amazing.
Just the average general conversations
are about don't squirt on the sofa or
Okay, let's do it!
Music, dancing, action.
Good! Yes!
Sexy!
Yes.
That looks great.
What I'm trying to do in my
films is really showing how women
are active working
for their own pleasure,
communicating with their partners,
talking about consent
and how they are having
pleasure ultimately together.
Telling them not to have
sex as porn performers,
but to have sex in a more normal way.
- That is a wrap! We have a wrap!
- Whoo!
So ends my time with Lady Lust and team.
Always good to go out with a bang.
Thank you!
- It wasn't that strange, was it?
- Not at all.
Sex is way more scary.
Visha! Let's do a selfie.
- Hello, darling.
- All right, love.
There's just such a world of difference
between the films that Erika produces
and the worst kinds of mainstream porn.
There's boundaries, respect and care.
No one's exploited,
and everyone's included.
I came in kind of, like,
"Why would you pay for porn?"
You pay for an experience. You
pay for the safety of others.
It was just thoroughly enjoyable
because they got comfortable.
You could see them enjoying themselves.
And that's what you pay for.
You pay for the realness.
But you also know that
they're gonna be treated right,
and that's important 'cause
you get attached to them all.
I was like, "Yeah, go, come, whoo!"
I don't know, it was amazing.
I'm like, "Girl, you get it!"
I want to high five all
of them. It was wonderful.
I think that the best thing
that people could really do
is to pay for their porn
and support creators and performers.
That's how you make a
difference in the world.
Not all porn is the same.
I was just very happy to see sex
being represented in a way
that I knew it was in real life.
If I had seen that kind of porn
when I was a teenager or kid,
I would've felt more respected
and asked for what I
wanted as a woman more.
The first time I asked a
man for what I wanted in bed
was this year, and I'm 29
years old. Like, that's insane.
Porn is problematic,
but it's not the problem.
Instead of blaming porn,
which is what we're doing,
we're not taking porn and
changing the narrative.
There is a healthy way that
porn can be made and watched,
ranging from, like, amateur porn,
Cindy Gallop, MakeLoveNotPorn,
or Erika Lust, an ethical feminist,
but more equality type porn.
But the problem is, we're
shoved so much of this tube porn
and the quantity of it down our throats,
you can't see anything else.
But there is so much
more out there to explore.
Like sexuality, you should
explore porn just the same.
- That's a banger!
- That's a banger!