Teen Trouble (2012) s01e03 Episode Script
Samm
I don't think you get it at all.
I'm Josh Shipp.
When a teen is out of control Usually I hook up at parties when I'm drunk.
And the parents are out of options It scares me.
I get the call.
Tonight on "Teen Trouble," I've got one shot to save 17-year-old Samm.
There's nothing in here that's funny.
- Yes.
- Yes, sir.
Your life is a web of lies.
I know you've been lyin'.
I know you've been gettin' high.
Sir, your family is bankrupt.
You need to step up and be a man.
Tell me what you expect from me.
I don't even want to talk to you.
Confess, ask for forgiveness.
I feel like that's it.
Don't screw this up.
Holy crap.
What happened? I know what it means to be a teen in trouble.
I was one Abandoned, abused, addicted but I beat the odds.
I'm a teen behavior specialist.
My approach is gritty, gutsy You can lie to everyone else.
You will not lie to me.
And in your face.
You're acting like a spoiled brat.
It's ridiculous.
My mission is to wake these teens and their parents up Here is a condom.
Here we have a beer can.
Before it's too late.
I'll be damned if I'm gonna let you throw away your life.
This week I am in hope, Indiana, where 17-year-old Samm is spiraling out of control.
Oh, my God.
Samm's parents have no idea their daughter is in serious danger.
It's regular teenager stuff.
What makes Samm's case unusual is that she reached out to me.
Like aah! That's a big difference.
I don't like anything about hope, Indiana.
It's full of cornfields.
It's, like, so far away from, like, all the other towns.
Nobody ever gets out of here.
But I find ways not to be bored.
Lately I've been smoking weed Like, every single day.
The more I smoke weed, the more I want to smoke weed.
Last week, I went to my friend's house after school, and I got really high and had to drive home.
Okay.
I think I'm a good driver when I'm high, but It's, like, you you can never be sure.
I don't know.
My parents would be pissed if they knew.
I can't even name all the pills I've done.
In the past month, I've done hydros, xanies, oxy I don't even know.
Like, my day just, like, flows on by.
I don't feel like I have control over Samm.
I guess I always feel like She'll work it out.
What did you hear about me? Yeah, you probably did hear that.
Samm's not doing anything with her life.
And that does affect me, because that's my life, is is my kids.
When Samm was born, I stayed at home 'cause I didn't work at that time.
So that's all I had was my babies.
I just loved everything about it.
Samantha is right in the middle.
She's the third of five.
Even when Samm was little, people were drawn to her.
Everybody loved Samm.
She was just a funny little girl.
She would jump up in the air and just fall down, land on her butt, and just laugh.
We had a great family.
We were very family-oriented.
When Samm was little, we camped a lot, we fished a lot.
She couldn't wait till I had time to go horse riding.
She'd go out and catch the horses.
She'd have 'em tied up.
She'd be ready to go.
I'm not sure exactly what happened, but when she got about 12 and 13, she started to check out.
I don't know why I did it.
Like, I was completely naked, and I just sent him those pictures.
Like Samm wanted to transfer to another school.
I-I don't even know why.
Maybe some jealousy issues over boys.
I have no idea.
After I sent one picture, it was easy to just keep sending more because I had already done the damage.
- I was like, with Nate - Yeah, that's a lot.
And then I was with Brayden, and then I was with Nate, and then I was with Brayden again.
Having sex is the same way, because if I have sex with one guy or, like, 50 guys, people are gonna think the same things about me.
Like, it doesn't matter.
That was, like, the drunkest I've ever been.
Like - Previously.
- I lost my underwear that night.
I can't I still don't have them.
I know that Samm doesn't tell me about certain things.
I'm okay with that because I think that everybody has to have their personal space.
What upsets me more than anything is her bad attitude.
Okay, so you applied yourself from the beginning of the year till now? I applied myself from the beginning of the test till the end of the test.
I miss out on a lot.
I work a week.
I got in on a Monday, and I get off the next Monday.
I'm gone for seven days straight.
You know, it's hard for me to deal with her attitude when I'm at home.
Charity's gone every other week.
I'm here all the time.
Samm knows exactly how to push my buttons.
She can be very disrespectful to me.
She just goes off yelling, like I don't don't know what I'm talking about.
Just 'cause you're the dad doesn't make you right.
We usually end up having an argument.
Don't.
Please don't even start it.
Don't.
My dad and I argue all the time.
He just likes to have control.
Like, he just likes the idea of, like, being able to tell me what to do.
Can I have $20? You did a half a job last night.
I'll give you I'll do a half I'll do another half of another job tomorrow night.
I think my dad feels like he can't discipline Samm, so he just plays the naive card, like he doesn't know.
He doesn't really ask questions or anything.
Dad, I'm gonna leave soon.
What time do you plan on being home? Yeah.
I really feel like my parents are so tired and stressed out, they've given up on Samm.
(Samm) My parents feel like I'm the crazy (Bleep) In this family.
I got in touch with Josh because I want something more out of life, like Like some like, I wanted my life to, like, go somewhere.
But now I just don't I don't even think it matters.
This situation is interesting in the fact that, you know, Samm is the one who reached out to me.
Now this is pretty rare.
It's often, you know, parents reaching out to me saying, "would you please come fix my kid?" But the parents are in the dark about the drug use and the sex.
I think these parents are going to be blindsided by the truth of how bad it's gotten.
And that's one of my concerns, is when I tell Samm, "look, you're gonna have to come completely clean with your parents," she's just gonna totally flip and be like, "screw you, screw this, I'm not doing this.
" But I don't care whether or not she likes that.
You have to face the facts.
You have to admit how bad this has gotten Otherwise, nothing is going to change.
Hey, it's Josh.
- How you doin'? - Dan? - I'm Dan.
- How do you do? Hi, Dakotah.
Nice to meet you.
Hi, Josh.
Hey, there you are.
Thank you guys for having me out here.
Talk to me about why I'm here.
What's the point of this? We understand it's to get Samm on the right track with making better choices and all.
And what does that mean specifically? It's mainly about her attitude.
That her attitude is the biggest threat in her life? Yes.
It's insane to me these parents think Samm's biggest problem is her attitude.
They're gonna be shocked when they find out what she's really up to.
Well, it's gonna be an eye-opening week for everybody.
And let me just say this prepare yourself.
All right? - That's great.
- So I'd love to spend some time One-on-one with Samm, and then later tonight, I'd love to spend some time with just the two of you, all right? When I first saw Josh, I was scared, 'cause I knew, he was just about ready to shake everything up.
But I just wanted to see what he had to say.
- Your life is a web of lies.
- Mnh-mnh.
You're gonna come clean with your parents this week.
That is an enormous failure.
- It scares me.
- It is scary.
Brace yourself.
One of the first things I do is, I get the kid out of the house, away from their parents, somewhere they feel comfortable.
Hopefully, by them feeling comfortable, they'll be more likely to open up to me.
Why'd you almost back out on me? Just be honest.
Because I just felt like I wasn't ready to stop.
Are you ready to stop today? No.
Like, why? Are you happy? Yes or no.
Yes.
I don't believe that.
I want to, right now, help you begin to think about how your life could be different? I don't want to think about it.
Why don't you want to think about it? I don't think it matters right now.
Like in three years from now, then we can think about it.
But you kinda want to just milk it a few more years - and then turn things around.
- Yeah.
Let's keep doing drugs.
Let's keep Let's milk it a few more years, and then Yeah.
It's totally this when-then concept.
You know, when I graduate high school, then I'll change.
Or when I graduate college, then I'll change.
- Not really - What's wrong with that? The issue is, the then never happens.
Look, you had the courage to reach out to me and ask for help.
So obviously, somewhere deep down inside, at least 1% of you wants to change.
But there's something in your mind right now that's yelling at you that's saying, "you can't change.
This is just the way your life's gonna be.
You might as well accept it.
" And that voice is lying to you.
Do you want to know what I think about you? - Yeah.
- All right.
W Wait.
No.
Your life is an entire web of lies.
All right.
Now look back at my face.
- Okay.
- I'm not joking.
But I have, like, the web map.
But you're getting caught in your own web.
It frustrates me.
I grew up in some small town in Oklahoma.
I grew up in the foster care system.
I was abused.
I was raped.
And everyone always saw that punk foster kid.
And I always believed that's all I was ever gonna be.
And all you believe is that that what you are right now is all you're ever gonna be.
It's the biggest lie you're telling yourself.
Yeah, but I don't see myself being anything else.
But you could be.
I just feel like it doesn't even matter.
Like, it's not gonna work out for me.
Like, I'm not gonna be able to go to college.
Nobody's trying to make me do that, so it's just like, okay.
And that's part of why I'm here, is to help give you a different option.
If you trust this process, your life can be better if you choose for it to be.
But let me tell you the bad news you don't want to hear.
You're gonna come clean with your parents this week.
Either you're gonna do it or I'm gonna do it for you.
This week is going to be intense.
You have to trust me every step of the way.
Are you on board? I'm on board.
Oh, man, oh, man.
Samm is delusional about the reality of her situation.
Deep down, my secret little fear right now is that I come up with this brilliant scheme to wake her up And it doesn't work.
I'm just glad we're gonna have some time together.
I know you guys are private, and I appreciate the gesture you guys are making, letting me into these details.
What do you guys know as far as what she's involved in? Directly, nothing.
Indirectly, I know she's sexually active.
Um, what is your stance on sex? Well, I think it's a personal thing and I think it's her choice.
I mean, I think that they have to make their own mistakes and learn from their own mistakes.
I assume that there's drugs.
And what is your stance on drugs? None.
What's the consequence? There's the problem.
We've pointed out a blind spot.
We've found a blind spot.
You guys should, in a second Be able to go, "here's the consequence.
" Kids need boundaries.
Teenagers buck boundaries.
They would never admit to you publicly that they want 'em.
But as a kid who didn't have 'em and then got boundaries, I can tell you, it is the best thing.
"When this happens, here is a consequence.
" 'Cause if you've got nothing to lose, why the hell not get high? Right.
Look, in Samm you have a very smart daughter, but she is a con artist.
She is.
She's a liar.
She manipulates you guys as a couple.
So it's important that you guys are on the same page about consequence, and that's one of the biggest concerns to me, walking into this.
Although you aren't always together physically as parents, you've gotta be on the same page.
I thought we was.
Maybe not on Samm's page, but I thought we was on the same page.
We communicate well.
And would you guys say that you communicate well with Samm? I we used to, but not anymore, no.
- Yeah, I'd have to say that.
- Not at all.
Dan, I know you and Samm have a beef.
You guys haven't got along in some time.
I see that you feel disrespected, spit on by your daughter.
But here's what's at stake a teen who doesn't have a good relationship with her dad is 700% more likely to become pregnant as a teen.
You are the father.
You are the leader of this home.
But for you to give up on your relationship with your daughter, that, as a parent, is an enormous failure.
Look, this will not be easy.
This is gonna be some of the hardest stuff you've done.
But it's gonna be worth it.
I've seen it time and time again with families I've worked with.
They call me in, they say, "he's a little lazy, she's not living up to her potential" the same kind of lines you guys are feeding me.
And the truth is, underneath that, there's a big, ugly, scary issue going on that no one wants to talk about.
Brace yourself.
I intend to get to the bottom of that.
She's 17.
You guys don't have much time to influence her.
You've got a year left.
You guys gotta get this right.
It scares me.
What's going on here is scary.
You guys are gonna have your world rocked this week.
Are you taking any kind of illegal drugs? Weed.
There's nothing in here that's funny.
I don't think you get it at all.
This isn't the holiday inn.
You understand? You have no sense of responsibility, and it disgusts me.
- Morning, Dan.
- Morning.
How are you, sir? - Good to see you.
Hey, Samm.
- What up? - How are you? - Good.
What do you think we're doing? God only knows.
Perfect.
Bye.
Today I am hoping to scare the living crap out of Samm so she finally snaps out of it and goes, "oh, my God.
I gotta do something different.
" Are you glad I'm here or do you feel like this is a waste of your time? I'm glad you're here, but I don't know if it's a waste of my time.
I haven't decided yet.
That's fair.
- Are we getting pulled over right now? - Yeah.
Good luck.
Okay, go ahead and put your hands behind your back.
This morning, unknown to Samm, I'm going to take her to a juvenile detention center.
Why? Because she's drinking, she's doing drugs, she's driving under the influence.
That's where she's going to end up.
And I need her to have that wake-up call.
Walk straight ahead and just stop where you're at, okay? Open your mouth.
Take your jacket off.
Samm, these folks are working with me, but this is no game.
This is truly your future if you don't change.
I don't believe you.
You don't? How many kids you bring in here for driving under the influence, - for drugs? - Quite a few.
All the same crap you're doing.
We're gonna go over the rules here of this facility.
I need you to read those out loud for me.
Are you serious? Yes.
"Respond with 'yes, sir'" Now just stand right here, close to the yellow line, but you do not cross it.
Do you understand? Yes.
- Yes, what? - Yes, sir.
And that's funny? No.
I'm not laughing.
You're smiling.
There's nothing in here that's funny.
- You understand that? - Yes.
- Yes, sir.
- Yes, sir.
Have a seat.
I'm gonna spray some lice shampoo in your hair, and you're gonna rub it in.
What I'm looking for today is for her to crack open, for her to break down, for her to wake the hell up, and I believe that this process will get through to her.
Cross the yellow line.
Pick up your stuff.
Take your rule book, walk that direction.
They didn't care if I didn't want to be there.
They didn't care if I wasn't feeling good.
They didn't care if I didn't want to take a shower.
They didn't care.
They just took everything away.
This is gonna be your room while you're here.
This isn't the holiday inn.
You understand? This is your toilet, this is your sink.
It's all one unit.
Need a drink, you drink right out of the sink.
It's also a water fountain.
8-5 door, please.
Why didn't you eat any of your food? Wasn't hungry.
You'll be hungry by dinner.
Hey, get your hands behind your back.
Down! One! Down! Two! - One, two, three.
- Three.
One, two, three.
Four.
One, two, three.
Six.
One, two, three.
Let's go.
Come on.
I just don't want to do it anymore.
You had two level-one offenses.
One was your hands not being behind your back when we came up from dinner.
And the second one's for sleeping.
You signed off on the rules saying that you knew 'em, so you gotta abide by 'em.
They're like, "here, clean all the toilets and mop the floors," and I was pissed.
I'm not about to clean all these cells spotless.
I'm just gonna half-ass it.
I was, like, pissed off at Josh but I couldn't wait to see his face, because I knew, whenever I saw Josh, I was gonna scurry on out of that place, but he wasn't too happy with me.
How you doing? I am so pissed off at you right now.
Why? Because you haven't even known me for one day, and you make me come here? What's the point? You tell me what's the point.
I'm not the one that needs to learn a lesson here.
I learned it.
- You just want to get outta here.
- I know.
You think this is cute and clever and a game.
I do not care if you're pissed at me.
I'd rather you be pissed at me and spend a couple days in here than spend a couple of years in here.
But you are so arrogant, you're not even getting the lesson.
So you've got two options right now.
You can be prideful and be angry at me and you can be a victim Or you can humble yourself and be angry at your choices for getting you here.
I don't think you get it at all.
You don't think I get it? I pick the second one.
Look, that cute smirk may work with everyone else.
It will not work with me.
You think I'm being unreasonable? Why? 'Cause it's the small town's fault.
It's your parents' fault.
It's everyone else's fault but your own.
You have no sense of responsibility, and it disgusts me.
I'm not here for you to like me.
I'm here to help you change your life, and you're staying the night here.
You have to stay the night here because you're not waking up.
And I'm prepared to leave you in here for three months.
When she was a little girl, daydreaming about her future, it did not look like this.
But this is what her future looks like.
I brought your parents here.
I know you've been lyin'.
I know you've been gettin' high.
Sir, your family is bankrupt.
Tell me what I have to do.
I don't even want to talk to you.
All right, everybody.
It's time to wake up.
And, Samm, you gotta get up and fold your blankets.
Fine.
Good morning.
Good morning.
How'd you sleep? I didn't.
Did you do any serious thinking last night? Tell me about that.
Well, I'm not pissed off at you.
All right.
That's a start.
Here's what I'm gonna ask of you next I've brought your parents here.
And I need you to confess a couple things to them number one, that you get high at school, number two, that you've driven your dad's truck while high.
Then you stay here.
So ball's in your court.
What do you want to do? Okay.
Ultimately, Samm is gonna have to come clean about all of her bad choices, but I want her to get started with two specific things that could put her right back behind bars.
What's up with you? That's what you're in here for, to chill? There are things that I'm aware of that she has been keeping from the two of you.
If Samm confesses, the right thing to do is to forgive.
Samm, you have a couple of things to share with your parents? So, mom Is there anything else you'd like to say? Whose car? Whose truck? Do you Feel bad for doing that? You do? So what's our plan to change it? What are we gonna do different? I don't see how you can sit there and be like you're not affecting so many people.
But I do get it.
I get that the choices I make affect everybody around me.
I get that I can end up here.
I know that's a possibility.
I don't have any self-value, obviously, if I think it's okay to just Kill my brain.
I know that I want to change, but And I know that I need to change, but I don't know how to change.
You know, a lot of this is my fault, that I failed as a parent.
But I promise you I promise From this day forward You will have consequences, and the choices you've been making are not gonna be allowed in our house.
Do you hear me? I know you've been lyin'.
I know you've been gettin' high.
You think I don't know that? You never said anything about it.
Would it have made a difference? Maybe.
Okay.
Well, I'm sorry that I failed you on that part.
It won't happen again.
One of the most powerful things a parent can do is apologize to their kid.
You are, in real time, modeling for them what it looks like to be a grown-up.
Thank you for taking responsibility of your part in this.
Now I'm gonna be hard on you for a minute.
Okay.
You're at fault here as well.
What I see from you is a reflection of her.
Look at you you both got your arms crossed, both stubborn.
I don't know what this is, but sometimes, she won't even look at you.
A man's family is a reflection of his investment in it.
Sir, your family is bankrupt.
You need to step up and be a man.
What do I need to change? Respectfully, the truth is, if you don't show your daughter your emotion, she'll go get it from some other man.
This is your responsibility.
And it's something Samm needs.
Dan had a real opportunity to connect with Samm today, and he completely blew it.
The good news is, Samm did not let her opportunity pass her by.
The next thing I need to do is address Samm's promiscuity.
She needs to understand that she is playing with fire, and one bad decision could burn her.
I just wanted to tell you a little bit about my story because I know that you are having sex, and I had unprotected sex.
I had one sexual encounter between my two husbands and I got H.
I.
V.
Actually, full-blown A.
I.
D.
S.
Just one time.
And about six years into it, I started getting really, really sick.
I was 80 pounds, in and out of the hospital.
I was dying.
And obviously, it changed my entire life.
I lost my husband, my stepsons, my job, my health, and I caused this to me, to my child To my parents and my family and everyone that loves me.
And I wish that I could change it and go back, but you can't.
All you can do is start right here, Samm, and you gotta love yourself enough to protect yourself, because people don't think about it.
If you're with a guy that's had sex with five other girls unprotected, you've had sex with those five girls.
It's scary to, like, hear your story.
- It's, like, it scares me.
- Good.
- And thank you for that, because - Good.
Like, even just the small choices, like having sex just one time with just this one guy, even if I don't get pregnant, I'll get H.
I.
V.
Or something.
I've made that choice, and for the rest of my life, it's gonna change every decision I make.
It was incredible.
That got through to her.
That one time, one choice, could completely change everything.
How important do you think it is to talk about sex with your kids? Oh, it's huge.
It's huge.
Yeah, maybe talk to Charity about that.
- Mama - 'Cause that's something I really want her to hear.
It's huge.
And it's hard.
It's so hard.
But it's huge.
And once you get that door open, oh, it's just amazing to know that your kid can come to you about anything, about anything, and dad, too.
How cool would that be, to have a dad you could go confide in? "He's gonna love me no matter what.
" Yeah, I just think that it's not it would just be weird to have that with my dad.
Like, I just think it would be so, like, awkward and uncomfortable and just weird.
- To have a good relationship? - Yeah.
Well, anything that's unfamiliar is uncomfortable and weird.
Well, like, why would you want to have that kind of relationship with me? I don't want the relationship your mom has with you.
I want the relationship like we had when we rode horses together and done stuff like that.
And so what's that gonna take? I don't even know.
Like, I don't even know why that relationship changed.
I don't either.
You used to, like, you would always bring home something like flowers or you would, like, just like stupid stuff yeah.
I remember one time you went on a fishing trip, and I sat under the table and cried 'cause I did not want you to leave.
But now it's like I don't even want to talk to you About anything.
Tell me what I have to do.
You're the parent.
Just tell me what you expect from me.
I don't know.
There is a healthy father-daughter relationship.
And I think you don't know what you're looking for because you haven't had it.
Dan, you know deep down you love her, but I'm not certain she feels that.
I'm not certain she knows that, and that's why she's running to the arms of other men.
You need to step up and be a man.
I believe being a man is not about driving a truck, shooting a gun.
I believe being a man is about taking responsibility.
A man is willing to say, "I'm not perfect" Yeah.
"But damn it, I love you, and I know I screw up, but I want you to love me, and I want to try.
" I'm gonna ask you to take responsibility of this one.
That I can do.
Thank you, sir.
I was mad that I was still alive.
Confess, ask for forgiveness.
I feel like that's it.
Holy crap.
What happened? Don't screw this up.
Samm thinks she's ruined any chance for a better life.
So what I want to do is introduce her to someone who's made some similar mistakes, but found a way to overcome them.
Good morning.
- Hi.
- Samm, this is Jackie.
- Hi, Jackie.
- Nice to meet you.
Nice to meet you.
Why I wanted you to meet Jackie is that she has sort of a similar backstory to you.
At one point, wasn't making the best choices, but then made the choice to change her life, and now her life is pretty great.
This is actually where I went to school, too.
- Really? - Yeah.
I've never even been on a college campus 'cause I never even imagined going to a university.
Like, I just didn't think that was in the cards for me.
You're 17, right? - Mm-hmm.
- How old were you when it started? - The drugs and the partying and stuff? - Mm-hmm.
- 14, 15.
- Yeah.
What I wanted to share with you is that from the age of 11 to 22, my life was absolute chaos.
I would go to parties, and people would bring me my own alcohol, because they didn't want me drinking theirs.
Dang.
Yeah, and I tried other drugs when I was in high school.
I remember hooking up with random people.
I let anybody who wanted to kind of have free rein over me.
The only real attention that I had was from guys that didn't respect me.
But I wanted to be loved, and I wanted to love people so badly, but I couldn't, 'cause I didn't love myself.
I got to the point where I was really ashamed of what I was doing.
And I sat down on my couch with a glass of wine, a bottle of rum, and two bottles of pills.
When I woke up in the hospital, I was mad.
I was mad that I was still alive.
And Um I'm so glad to be alive now.
Things got better because I started to care about myself and I went back to college.
I got my undergraduate degree here at I.
U.
, and then I decided I wanted to be a social worker, and I wanted to work with people who had experiences like mine, um, which is part of the reason why I wanted to meet with you.
Right.
Like For you to make that much of a difference in your life, like, it's just incredible.
It's something that you could do, too.
Mm.
Like, I think it would be So incredible to come to college.
Mm-hmm.
I just never saw my saw myself even being here with you Like, even visiting your college - Mm-hmm.
- Like, I've never even thought about doing that.
We can make it happen.
If you want something bad enough, you can have it.
You can.
It's, like, overwhelming to feel like I have complete control.
I mean, like, it's just, like, up to me, and I can go to college.
It's weird.
I absolutely promise we're gonna stay in touch.
Okay? Thank you so much.
Oh, I'm so glad.
As long as it takes.
With Samm, I've been making a lot of progress, but now she has to really make that gesture, which is coming completely clean to her parents.
That's the thing with this family, they don't talk about the issues.
And if they don't do that, their family will never, ever get better.
So here's an important and crucial part of the process the truth, coming clean as a family.
So, Samm, you were courageous enough to ask me out here this week.
Mm-hmm.
And so I'm gonna ask you to be courageous enough to begin.
Um Confessing? What I'm looking for is just for you to lay all the cards on the table.
All of the cards? Um Are they not already on the table? Out of all the things that we're getting it out all out there, there's nothing else? Right.
You're smart.
You know that's not true.
I know.
I am smart enough to know that it is true.
All right, as an example, yes, your parents do know you're sexually active, but they don't know to what extent.
They know.
I don't think so.
Why are you shutting down right now? Do you feel like they're judging you? No.
I feel like that's it.
She's the old Samm.
Sort of the Samm I remember from three or four days ago.
Holy crap.
What happened? You've made a lot of progress this week.
Yeah.
Don't screw this up.
How many people have you had unprotected sex with in the last six months? Six people.
Is there any other drug use your parents aren't aware of? Um, pills.
I don't have anything else to say.
It's somebody else's turn.
Here's the bottom line when you confess the truth, then we can move on to the next person.
But until you do that, I'm not moving on.
You've covered basically everything outside of the real reasons as to why you had trouble at school.
We know it's not easy.
But I know you want to do this.
Right? Yeah, and I did it.
Did I not? I want you to be honest with your parents.
That's all I'm asking.
I don't know.
I shouldn't have taken advantage of you allowing me to have a phone, 'cause that is very disrespectful to you guys and to myself.
And I'm sorry for, um, not taking into consideration how it would make you feel, and you, of, like, the choices I made, 'cause I didn't want you to feel like it was your fault, 'cause I know you did.
I haven't made good choices, and it's not okay for me to put you guys through that.
And I just want to say thank you to both of you guys For, like Being here through all of this.
It's awesome.
I'm impressed.
Thank you.
I'm very proud.
Charity.
Um, I just want to apologize for not taking the responsibility of training you and showing you consequences of good choices and bad choices.
And I promise that I will make sure that that happens from here on out.
Dan, what about for you? The one issue I've been hammering you on all week taking responsibility in improving the relationship with Samm.
I need Samm to hear, as her father, how you're going to lead that process.
I hope after this, we can get our relationship back to it was when you cried under the table when I left.
I think there were several issues that built that up.
Um, probably taking my frustrations out in anger, I think that kind of built a wall.
And, uh, I think we can fix that by finding some common ground to do things together.
So, Dakotah, what do you think of all this? I don't think I've ever heard Samm apologize to my parents like that before for anything.
I've never heard my dad talk that emotionally before.
I'm a little bit shocked and, um, I'm just really proud of you For Overcoming that fear and wall that you put up.
I just want you to know that I love you, and I am very proud of you.
You're awesome.
So the primary issue in this family was a lack of communication and a lack of responsibility amongst all parties.
And so I've assembled a 90-day program to help continue to support the progress that we've made.
If I said thank you every second, every day for the rest of my life, it would not be enough.
I just want you to know that Every opportunity that you have given me, I'm gonna take advantage of it For the rest of my life.
You're awesome.
I'm very proud of you.
Samm is not a new person yet.
Samm has made the decision that she wants to be a new person, but it's going to take a while.
I genuinely believe Samm is going to make it.
It's just, like, a huge weight lifted off my shoulders.
And now I just feel like I can start over.
I can be above and better than all of those things that I've been doing 'cause I am better than that, and I have this, like, whole nother life for me that, like, is just right there in my reach.
I'm Josh Shipp.
When a teen is out of control Usually I hook up at parties when I'm drunk.
And the parents are out of options It scares me.
I get the call.
Tonight on "Teen Trouble," I've got one shot to save 17-year-old Samm.
There's nothing in here that's funny.
- Yes.
- Yes, sir.
Your life is a web of lies.
I know you've been lyin'.
I know you've been gettin' high.
Sir, your family is bankrupt.
You need to step up and be a man.
Tell me what you expect from me.
I don't even want to talk to you.
Confess, ask for forgiveness.
I feel like that's it.
Don't screw this up.
Holy crap.
What happened? I know what it means to be a teen in trouble.
I was one Abandoned, abused, addicted but I beat the odds.
I'm a teen behavior specialist.
My approach is gritty, gutsy You can lie to everyone else.
You will not lie to me.
And in your face.
You're acting like a spoiled brat.
It's ridiculous.
My mission is to wake these teens and their parents up Here is a condom.
Here we have a beer can.
Before it's too late.
I'll be damned if I'm gonna let you throw away your life.
This week I am in hope, Indiana, where 17-year-old Samm is spiraling out of control.
Oh, my God.
Samm's parents have no idea their daughter is in serious danger.
It's regular teenager stuff.
What makes Samm's case unusual is that she reached out to me.
Like aah! That's a big difference.
I don't like anything about hope, Indiana.
It's full of cornfields.
It's, like, so far away from, like, all the other towns.
Nobody ever gets out of here.
But I find ways not to be bored.
Lately I've been smoking weed Like, every single day.
The more I smoke weed, the more I want to smoke weed.
Last week, I went to my friend's house after school, and I got really high and had to drive home.
Okay.
I think I'm a good driver when I'm high, but It's, like, you you can never be sure.
I don't know.
My parents would be pissed if they knew.
I can't even name all the pills I've done.
In the past month, I've done hydros, xanies, oxy I don't even know.
Like, my day just, like, flows on by.
I don't feel like I have control over Samm.
I guess I always feel like She'll work it out.
What did you hear about me? Yeah, you probably did hear that.
Samm's not doing anything with her life.
And that does affect me, because that's my life, is is my kids.
When Samm was born, I stayed at home 'cause I didn't work at that time.
So that's all I had was my babies.
I just loved everything about it.
Samantha is right in the middle.
She's the third of five.
Even when Samm was little, people were drawn to her.
Everybody loved Samm.
She was just a funny little girl.
She would jump up in the air and just fall down, land on her butt, and just laugh.
We had a great family.
We were very family-oriented.
When Samm was little, we camped a lot, we fished a lot.
She couldn't wait till I had time to go horse riding.
She'd go out and catch the horses.
She'd have 'em tied up.
She'd be ready to go.
I'm not sure exactly what happened, but when she got about 12 and 13, she started to check out.
I don't know why I did it.
Like, I was completely naked, and I just sent him those pictures.
Like Samm wanted to transfer to another school.
I-I don't even know why.
Maybe some jealousy issues over boys.
I have no idea.
After I sent one picture, it was easy to just keep sending more because I had already done the damage.
- I was like, with Nate - Yeah, that's a lot.
And then I was with Brayden, and then I was with Nate, and then I was with Brayden again.
Having sex is the same way, because if I have sex with one guy or, like, 50 guys, people are gonna think the same things about me.
Like, it doesn't matter.
That was, like, the drunkest I've ever been.
Like - Previously.
- I lost my underwear that night.
I can't I still don't have them.
I know that Samm doesn't tell me about certain things.
I'm okay with that because I think that everybody has to have their personal space.
What upsets me more than anything is her bad attitude.
Okay, so you applied yourself from the beginning of the year till now? I applied myself from the beginning of the test till the end of the test.
I miss out on a lot.
I work a week.
I got in on a Monday, and I get off the next Monday.
I'm gone for seven days straight.
You know, it's hard for me to deal with her attitude when I'm at home.
Charity's gone every other week.
I'm here all the time.
Samm knows exactly how to push my buttons.
She can be very disrespectful to me.
She just goes off yelling, like I don't don't know what I'm talking about.
Just 'cause you're the dad doesn't make you right.
We usually end up having an argument.
Don't.
Please don't even start it.
Don't.
My dad and I argue all the time.
He just likes to have control.
Like, he just likes the idea of, like, being able to tell me what to do.
Can I have $20? You did a half a job last night.
I'll give you I'll do a half I'll do another half of another job tomorrow night.
I think my dad feels like he can't discipline Samm, so he just plays the naive card, like he doesn't know.
He doesn't really ask questions or anything.
Dad, I'm gonna leave soon.
What time do you plan on being home? Yeah.
I really feel like my parents are so tired and stressed out, they've given up on Samm.
(Samm) My parents feel like I'm the crazy (Bleep) In this family.
I got in touch with Josh because I want something more out of life, like Like some like, I wanted my life to, like, go somewhere.
But now I just don't I don't even think it matters.
This situation is interesting in the fact that, you know, Samm is the one who reached out to me.
Now this is pretty rare.
It's often, you know, parents reaching out to me saying, "would you please come fix my kid?" But the parents are in the dark about the drug use and the sex.
I think these parents are going to be blindsided by the truth of how bad it's gotten.
And that's one of my concerns, is when I tell Samm, "look, you're gonna have to come completely clean with your parents," she's just gonna totally flip and be like, "screw you, screw this, I'm not doing this.
" But I don't care whether or not she likes that.
You have to face the facts.
You have to admit how bad this has gotten Otherwise, nothing is going to change.
Hey, it's Josh.
- How you doin'? - Dan? - I'm Dan.
- How do you do? Hi, Dakotah.
Nice to meet you.
Hi, Josh.
Hey, there you are.
Thank you guys for having me out here.
Talk to me about why I'm here.
What's the point of this? We understand it's to get Samm on the right track with making better choices and all.
And what does that mean specifically? It's mainly about her attitude.
That her attitude is the biggest threat in her life? Yes.
It's insane to me these parents think Samm's biggest problem is her attitude.
They're gonna be shocked when they find out what she's really up to.
Well, it's gonna be an eye-opening week for everybody.
And let me just say this prepare yourself.
All right? - That's great.
- So I'd love to spend some time One-on-one with Samm, and then later tonight, I'd love to spend some time with just the two of you, all right? When I first saw Josh, I was scared, 'cause I knew, he was just about ready to shake everything up.
But I just wanted to see what he had to say.
- Your life is a web of lies.
- Mnh-mnh.
You're gonna come clean with your parents this week.
That is an enormous failure.
- It scares me.
- It is scary.
Brace yourself.
One of the first things I do is, I get the kid out of the house, away from their parents, somewhere they feel comfortable.
Hopefully, by them feeling comfortable, they'll be more likely to open up to me.
Why'd you almost back out on me? Just be honest.
Because I just felt like I wasn't ready to stop.
Are you ready to stop today? No.
Like, why? Are you happy? Yes or no.
Yes.
I don't believe that.
I want to, right now, help you begin to think about how your life could be different? I don't want to think about it.
Why don't you want to think about it? I don't think it matters right now.
Like in three years from now, then we can think about it.
But you kinda want to just milk it a few more years - and then turn things around.
- Yeah.
Let's keep doing drugs.
Let's keep Let's milk it a few more years, and then Yeah.
It's totally this when-then concept.
You know, when I graduate high school, then I'll change.
Or when I graduate college, then I'll change.
- Not really - What's wrong with that? The issue is, the then never happens.
Look, you had the courage to reach out to me and ask for help.
So obviously, somewhere deep down inside, at least 1% of you wants to change.
But there's something in your mind right now that's yelling at you that's saying, "you can't change.
This is just the way your life's gonna be.
You might as well accept it.
" And that voice is lying to you.
Do you want to know what I think about you? - Yeah.
- All right.
W Wait.
No.
Your life is an entire web of lies.
All right.
Now look back at my face.
- Okay.
- I'm not joking.
But I have, like, the web map.
But you're getting caught in your own web.
It frustrates me.
I grew up in some small town in Oklahoma.
I grew up in the foster care system.
I was abused.
I was raped.
And everyone always saw that punk foster kid.
And I always believed that's all I was ever gonna be.
And all you believe is that that what you are right now is all you're ever gonna be.
It's the biggest lie you're telling yourself.
Yeah, but I don't see myself being anything else.
But you could be.
I just feel like it doesn't even matter.
Like, it's not gonna work out for me.
Like, I'm not gonna be able to go to college.
Nobody's trying to make me do that, so it's just like, okay.
And that's part of why I'm here, is to help give you a different option.
If you trust this process, your life can be better if you choose for it to be.
But let me tell you the bad news you don't want to hear.
You're gonna come clean with your parents this week.
Either you're gonna do it or I'm gonna do it for you.
This week is going to be intense.
You have to trust me every step of the way.
Are you on board? I'm on board.
Oh, man, oh, man.
Samm is delusional about the reality of her situation.
Deep down, my secret little fear right now is that I come up with this brilliant scheme to wake her up And it doesn't work.
I'm just glad we're gonna have some time together.
I know you guys are private, and I appreciate the gesture you guys are making, letting me into these details.
What do you guys know as far as what she's involved in? Directly, nothing.
Indirectly, I know she's sexually active.
Um, what is your stance on sex? Well, I think it's a personal thing and I think it's her choice.
I mean, I think that they have to make their own mistakes and learn from their own mistakes.
I assume that there's drugs.
And what is your stance on drugs? None.
What's the consequence? There's the problem.
We've pointed out a blind spot.
We've found a blind spot.
You guys should, in a second Be able to go, "here's the consequence.
" Kids need boundaries.
Teenagers buck boundaries.
They would never admit to you publicly that they want 'em.
But as a kid who didn't have 'em and then got boundaries, I can tell you, it is the best thing.
"When this happens, here is a consequence.
" 'Cause if you've got nothing to lose, why the hell not get high? Right.
Look, in Samm you have a very smart daughter, but she is a con artist.
She is.
She's a liar.
She manipulates you guys as a couple.
So it's important that you guys are on the same page about consequence, and that's one of the biggest concerns to me, walking into this.
Although you aren't always together physically as parents, you've gotta be on the same page.
I thought we was.
Maybe not on Samm's page, but I thought we was on the same page.
We communicate well.
And would you guys say that you communicate well with Samm? I we used to, but not anymore, no.
- Yeah, I'd have to say that.
- Not at all.
Dan, I know you and Samm have a beef.
You guys haven't got along in some time.
I see that you feel disrespected, spit on by your daughter.
But here's what's at stake a teen who doesn't have a good relationship with her dad is 700% more likely to become pregnant as a teen.
You are the father.
You are the leader of this home.
But for you to give up on your relationship with your daughter, that, as a parent, is an enormous failure.
Look, this will not be easy.
This is gonna be some of the hardest stuff you've done.
But it's gonna be worth it.
I've seen it time and time again with families I've worked with.
They call me in, they say, "he's a little lazy, she's not living up to her potential" the same kind of lines you guys are feeding me.
And the truth is, underneath that, there's a big, ugly, scary issue going on that no one wants to talk about.
Brace yourself.
I intend to get to the bottom of that.
She's 17.
You guys don't have much time to influence her.
You've got a year left.
You guys gotta get this right.
It scares me.
What's going on here is scary.
You guys are gonna have your world rocked this week.
Are you taking any kind of illegal drugs? Weed.
There's nothing in here that's funny.
I don't think you get it at all.
This isn't the holiday inn.
You understand? You have no sense of responsibility, and it disgusts me.
- Morning, Dan.
- Morning.
How are you, sir? - Good to see you.
Hey, Samm.
- What up? - How are you? - Good.
What do you think we're doing? God only knows.
Perfect.
Bye.
Today I am hoping to scare the living crap out of Samm so she finally snaps out of it and goes, "oh, my God.
I gotta do something different.
" Are you glad I'm here or do you feel like this is a waste of your time? I'm glad you're here, but I don't know if it's a waste of my time.
I haven't decided yet.
That's fair.
- Are we getting pulled over right now? - Yeah.
Good luck.
Okay, go ahead and put your hands behind your back.
This morning, unknown to Samm, I'm going to take her to a juvenile detention center.
Why? Because she's drinking, she's doing drugs, she's driving under the influence.
That's where she's going to end up.
And I need her to have that wake-up call.
Walk straight ahead and just stop where you're at, okay? Open your mouth.
Take your jacket off.
Samm, these folks are working with me, but this is no game.
This is truly your future if you don't change.
I don't believe you.
You don't? How many kids you bring in here for driving under the influence, - for drugs? - Quite a few.
All the same crap you're doing.
We're gonna go over the rules here of this facility.
I need you to read those out loud for me.
Are you serious? Yes.
"Respond with 'yes, sir'" Now just stand right here, close to the yellow line, but you do not cross it.
Do you understand? Yes.
- Yes, what? - Yes, sir.
And that's funny? No.
I'm not laughing.
You're smiling.
There's nothing in here that's funny.
- You understand that? - Yes.
- Yes, sir.
- Yes, sir.
Have a seat.
I'm gonna spray some lice shampoo in your hair, and you're gonna rub it in.
What I'm looking for today is for her to crack open, for her to break down, for her to wake the hell up, and I believe that this process will get through to her.
Cross the yellow line.
Pick up your stuff.
Take your rule book, walk that direction.
They didn't care if I didn't want to be there.
They didn't care if I wasn't feeling good.
They didn't care if I didn't want to take a shower.
They didn't care.
They just took everything away.
This is gonna be your room while you're here.
This isn't the holiday inn.
You understand? This is your toilet, this is your sink.
It's all one unit.
Need a drink, you drink right out of the sink.
It's also a water fountain.
8-5 door, please.
Why didn't you eat any of your food? Wasn't hungry.
You'll be hungry by dinner.
Hey, get your hands behind your back.
Down! One! Down! Two! - One, two, three.
- Three.
One, two, three.
Four.
One, two, three.
Six.
One, two, three.
Let's go.
Come on.
I just don't want to do it anymore.
You had two level-one offenses.
One was your hands not being behind your back when we came up from dinner.
And the second one's for sleeping.
You signed off on the rules saying that you knew 'em, so you gotta abide by 'em.
They're like, "here, clean all the toilets and mop the floors," and I was pissed.
I'm not about to clean all these cells spotless.
I'm just gonna half-ass it.
I was, like, pissed off at Josh but I couldn't wait to see his face, because I knew, whenever I saw Josh, I was gonna scurry on out of that place, but he wasn't too happy with me.
How you doing? I am so pissed off at you right now.
Why? Because you haven't even known me for one day, and you make me come here? What's the point? You tell me what's the point.
I'm not the one that needs to learn a lesson here.
I learned it.
- You just want to get outta here.
- I know.
You think this is cute and clever and a game.
I do not care if you're pissed at me.
I'd rather you be pissed at me and spend a couple days in here than spend a couple of years in here.
But you are so arrogant, you're not even getting the lesson.
So you've got two options right now.
You can be prideful and be angry at me and you can be a victim Or you can humble yourself and be angry at your choices for getting you here.
I don't think you get it at all.
You don't think I get it? I pick the second one.
Look, that cute smirk may work with everyone else.
It will not work with me.
You think I'm being unreasonable? Why? 'Cause it's the small town's fault.
It's your parents' fault.
It's everyone else's fault but your own.
You have no sense of responsibility, and it disgusts me.
I'm not here for you to like me.
I'm here to help you change your life, and you're staying the night here.
You have to stay the night here because you're not waking up.
And I'm prepared to leave you in here for three months.
When she was a little girl, daydreaming about her future, it did not look like this.
But this is what her future looks like.
I brought your parents here.
I know you've been lyin'.
I know you've been gettin' high.
Sir, your family is bankrupt.
Tell me what I have to do.
I don't even want to talk to you.
All right, everybody.
It's time to wake up.
And, Samm, you gotta get up and fold your blankets.
Fine.
Good morning.
Good morning.
How'd you sleep? I didn't.
Did you do any serious thinking last night? Tell me about that.
Well, I'm not pissed off at you.
All right.
That's a start.
Here's what I'm gonna ask of you next I've brought your parents here.
And I need you to confess a couple things to them number one, that you get high at school, number two, that you've driven your dad's truck while high.
Then you stay here.
So ball's in your court.
What do you want to do? Okay.
Ultimately, Samm is gonna have to come clean about all of her bad choices, but I want her to get started with two specific things that could put her right back behind bars.
What's up with you? That's what you're in here for, to chill? There are things that I'm aware of that she has been keeping from the two of you.
If Samm confesses, the right thing to do is to forgive.
Samm, you have a couple of things to share with your parents? So, mom Is there anything else you'd like to say? Whose car? Whose truck? Do you Feel bad for doing that? You do? So what's our plan to change it? What are we gonna do different? I don't see how you can sit there and be like you're not affecting so many people.
But I do get it.
I get that the choices I make affect everybody around me.
I get that I can end up here.
I know that's a possibility.
I don't have any self-value, obviously, if I think it's okay to just Kill my brain.
I know that I want to change, but And I know that I need to change, but I don't know how to change.
You know, a lot of this is my fault, that I failed as a parent.
But I promise you I promise From this day forward You will have consequences, and the choices you've been making are not gonna be allowed in our house.
Do you hear me? I know you've been lyin'.
I know you've been gettin' high.
You think I don't know that? You never said anything about it.
Would it have made a difference? Maybe.
Okay.
Well, I'm sorry that I failed you on that part.
It won't happen again.
One of the most powerful things a parent can do is apologize to their kid.
You are, in real time, modeling for them what it looks like to be a grown-up.
Thank you for taking responsibility of your part in this.
Now I'm gonna be hard on you for a minute.
Okay.
You're at fault here as well.
What I see from you is a reflection of her.
Look at you you both got your arms crossed, both stubborn.
I don't know what this is, but sometimes, she won't even look at you.
A man's family is a reflection of his investment in it.
Sir, your family is bankrupt.
You need to step up and be a man.
What do I need to change? Respectfully, the truth is, if you don't show your daughter your emotion, she'll go get it from some other man.
This is your responsibility.
And it's something Samm needs.
Dan had a real opportunity to connect with Samm today, and he completely blew it.
The good news is, Samm did not let her opportunity pass her by.
The next thing I need to do is address Samm's promiscuity.
She needs to understand that she is playing with fire, and one bad decision could burn her.
I just wanted to tell you a little bit about my story because I know that you are having sex, and I had unprotected sex.
I had one sexual encounter between my two husbands and I got H.
I.
V.
Actually, full-blown A.
I.
D.
S.
Just one time.
And about six years into it, I started getting really, really sick.
I was 80 pounds, in and out of the hospital.
I was dying.
And obviously, it changed my entire life.
I lost my husband, my stepsons, my job, my health, and I caused this to me, to my child To my parents and my family and everyone that loves me.
And I wish that I could change it and go back, but you can't.
All you can do is start right here, Samm, and you gotta love yourself enough to protect yourself, because people don't think about it.
If you're with a guy that's had sex with five other girls unprotected, you've had sex with those five girls.
It's scary to, like, hear your story.
- It's, like, it scares me.
- Good.
- And thank you for that, because - Good.
Like, even just the small choices, like having sex just one time with just this one guy, even if I don't get pregnant, I'll get H.
I.
V.
Or something.
I've made that choice, and for the rest of my life, it's gonna change every decision I make.
It was incredible.
That got through to her.
That one time, one choice, could completely change everything.
How important do you think it is to talk about sex with your kids? Oh, it's huge.
It's huge.
Yeah, maybe talk to Charity about that.
- Mama - 'Cause that's something I really want her to hear.
It's huge.
And it's hard.
It's so hard.
But it's huge.
And once you get that door open, oh, it's just amazing to know that your kid can come to you about anything, about anything, and dad, too.
How cool would that be, to have a dad you could go confide in? "He's gonna love me no matter what.
" Yeah, I just think that it's not it would just be weird to have that with my dad.
Like, I just think it would be so, like, awkward and uncomfortable and just weird.
- To have a good relationship? - Yeah.
Well, anything that's unfamiliar is uncomfortable and weird.
Well, like, why would you want to have that kind of relationship with me? I don't want the relationship your mom has with you.
I want the relationship like we had when we rode horses together and done stuff like that.
And so what's that gonna take? I don't even know.
Like, I don't even know why that relationship changed.
I don't either.
You used to, like, you would always bring home something like flowers or you would, like, just like stupid stuff yeah.
I remember one time you went on a fishing trip, and I sat under the table and cried 'cause I did not want you to leave.
But now it's like I don't even want to talk to you About anything.
Tell me what I have to do.
You're the parent.
Just tell me what you expect from me.
I don't know.
There is a healthy father-daughter relationship.
And I think you don't know what you're looking for because you haven't had it.
Dan, you know deep down you love her, but I'm not certain she feels that.
I'm not certain she knows that, and that's why she's running to the arms of other men.
You need to step up and be a man.
I believe being a man is not about driving a truck, shooting a gun.
I believe being a man is about taking responsibility.
A man is willing to say, "I'm not perfect" Yeah.
"But damn it, I love you, and I know I screw up, but I want you to love me, and I want to try.
" I'm gonna ask you to take responsibility of this one.
That I can do.
Thank you, sir.
I was mad that I was still alive.
Confess, ask for forgiveness.
I feel like that's it.
Holy crap.
What happened? Don't screw this up.
Samm thinks she's ruined any chance for a better life.
So what I want to do is introduce her to someone who's made some similar mistakes, but found a way to overcome them.
Good morning.
- Hi.
- Samm, this is Jackie.
- Hi, Jackie.
- Nice to meet you.
Nice to meet you.
Why I wanted you to meet Jackie is that she has sort of a similar backstory to you.
At one point, wasn't making the best choices, but then made the choice to change her life, and now her life is pretty great.
This is actually where I went to school, too.
- Really? - Yeah.
I've never even been on a college campus 'cause I never even imagined going to a university.
Like, I just didn't think that was in the cards for me.
You're 17, right? - Mm-hmm.
- How old were you when it started? - The drugs and the partying and stuff? - Mm-hmm.
- 14, 15.
- Yeah.
What I wanted to share with you is that from the age of 11 to 22, my life was absolute chaos.
I would go to parties, and people would bring me my own alcohol, because they didn't want me drinking theirs.
Dang.
Yeah, and I tried other drugs when I was in high school.
I remember hooking up with random people.
I let anybody who wanted to kind of have free rein over me.
The only real attention that I had was from guys that didn't respect me.
But I wanted to be loved, and I wanted to love people so badly, but I couldn't, 'cause I didn't love myself.
I got to the point where I was really ashamed of what I was doing.
And I sat down on my couch with a glass of wine, a bottle of rum, and two bottles of pills.
When I woke up in the hospital, I was mad.
I was mad that I was still alive.
And Um I'm so glad to be alive now.
Things got better because I started to care about myself and I went back to college.
I got my undergraduate degree here at I.
U.
, and then I decided I wanted to be a social worker, and I wanted to work with people who had experiences like mine, um, which is part of the reason why I wanted to meet with you.
Right.
Like For you to make that much of a difference in your life, like, it's just incredible.
It's something that you could do, too.
Mm.
Like, I think it would be So incredible to come to college.
Mm-hmm.
I just never saw my saw myself even being here with you Like, even visiting your college - Mm-hmm.
- Like, I've never even thought about doing that.
We can make it happen.
If you want something bad enough, you can have it.
You can.
It's, like, overwhelming to feel like I have complete control.
I mean, like, it's just, like, up to me, and I can go to college.
It's weird.
I absolutely promise we're gonna stay in touch.
Okay? Thank you so much.
Oh, I'm so glad.
As long as it takes.
With Samm, I've been making a lot of progress, but now she has to really make that gesture, which is coming completely clean to her parents.
That's the thing with this family, they don't talk about the issues.
And if they don't do that, their family will never, ever get better.
So here's an important and crucial part of the process the truth, coming clean as a family.
So, Samm, you were courageous enough to ask me out here this week.
Mm-hmm.
And so I'm gonna ask you to be courageous enough to begin.
Um Confessing? What I'm looking for is just for you to lay all the cards on the table.
All of the cards? Um Are they not already on the table? Out of all the things that we're getting it out all out there, there's nothing else? Right.
You're smart.
You know that's not true.
I know.
I am smart enough to know that it is true.
All right, as an example, yes, your parents do know you're sexually active, but they don't know to what extent.
They know.
I don't think so.
Why are you shutting down right now? Do you feel like they're judging you? No.
I feel like that's it.
She's the old Samm.
Sort of the Samm I remember from three or four days ago.
Holy crap.
What happened? You've made a lot of progress this week.
Yeah.
Don't screw this up.
How many people have you had unprotected sex with in the last six months? Six people.
Is there any other drug use your parents aren't aware of? Um, pills.
I don't have anything else to say.
It's somebody else's turn.
Here's the bottom line when you confess the truth, then we can move on to the next person.
But until you do that, I'm not moving on.
You've covered basically everything outside of the real reasons as to why you had trouble at school.
We know it's not easy.
But I know you want to do this.
Right? Yeah, and I did it.
Did I not? I want you to be honest with your parents.
That's all I'm asking.
I don't know.
I shouldn't have taken advantage of you allowing me to have a phone, 'cause that is very disrespectful to you guys and to myself.
And I'm sorry for, um, not taking into consideration how it would make you feel, and you, of, like, the choices I made, 'cause I didn't want you to feel like it was your fault, 'cause I know you did.
I haven't made good choices, and it's not okay for me to put you guys through that.
And I just want to say thank you to both of you guys For, like Being here through all of this.
It's awesome.
I'm impressed.
Thank you.
I'm very proud.
Charity.
Um, I just want to apologize for not taking the responsibility of training you and showing you consequences of good choices and bad choices.
And I promise that I will make sure that that happens from here on out.
Dan, what about for you? The one issue I've been hammering you on all week taking responsibility in improving the relationship with Samm.
I need Samm to hear, as her father, how you're going to lead that process.
I hope after this, we can get our relationship back to it was when you cried under the table when I left.
I think there were several issues that built that up.
Um, probably taking my frustrations out in anger, I think that kind of built a wall.
And, uh, I think we can fix that by finding some common ground to do things together.
So, Dakotah, what do you think of all this? I don't think I've ever heard Samm apologize to my parents like that before for anything.
I've never heard my dad talk that emotionally before.
I'm a little bit shocked and, um, I'm just really proud of you For Overcoming that fear and wall that you put up.
I just want you to know that I love you, and I am very proud of you.
You're awesome.
So the primary issue in this family was a lack of communication and a lack of responsibility amongst all parties.
And so I've assembled a 90-day program to help continue to support the progress that we've made.
If I said thank you every second, every day for the rest of my life, it would not be enough.
I just want you to know that Every opportunity that you have given me, I'm gonna take advantage of it For the rest of my life.
You're awesome.
I'm very proud of you.
Samm is not a new person yet.
Samm has made the decision that she wants to be a new person, but it's going to take a while.
I genuinely believe Samm is going to make it.
It's just, like, a huge weight lifted off my shoulders.
And now I just feel like I can start over.
I can be above and better than all of those things that I've been doing 'cause I am better than that, and I have this, like, whole nother life for me that, like, is just right there in my reach.