The A List (2018) s01e03 Episode Script

1
[narrator] When we're young, people often
call little girls princesses.
But what's the point
of becoming a princess
unless you grow up to become queen?
[theme song playing]
I don't trust my eyes anymore ♪
No one sees who I see ♪
Can it be true? ♪
It's not you ♪
Who are you? ♪
Who are you? ♪
[rain pattering]
[indistinct chatter]
Morning, Alex. How are you?
[Alex] Fine.
Since when do you care
how anyone else is doing?
Oh, I don't, but you thought I did, right?
I'm getting back in the game.
[upbeat rock music playing]
We are ♪
Burning ♪
On his eyes ♪
'Cause he likes you ♪
Big talk ♪
[Brendan] Yo, 11 o'clock.
Nah, Bren, it's, like, nine.
Bro, 11 o'clock.
I don't care what he thinks
[chuckles] Peregrine Island's
got talent, yo.
Hey, I call dibs on Amber.
[chuckles] I don't think
that's how it works.
[chuckles mockingly] Mate, I called it.
Okay, she's all yours.
Now, we just need to find
someone for you
Yeah?
Perfect. Now, we can double date!
[Dave] Plates in
the washing-up bowls, please.
Then join us
for today's exciting announcements.
Whoa!
Amber might have some serious competition
for these Bren guns, you know.
-Isn't she kinda high maintenance?
-[Brendan] Bro, you know what they say.
Hot, smart, sane
pick two.
And Mia is crazy hot. [chuckles]
All right, uh, bit of housekeeping
before the main event.
Someone's been taking stuff
from the first aid kit.
-Wow!
-Yes, and we've had food going missing.
[Dave] Yeah, no late-night snacks
in the cabins, please.
Right, on to the fun part.
This morning is orienteering!
And then, tonight, drum roll
It is our midsummer party!
[all cheering]
In local tradition,
it's a time of rebirth and renewal,
celebrated with a feast and a masked ball!
[Dave] We've got hot dogs and
an arts and crafts table
so you can make your own masks!
-[all exclaiming]
-Yes!
And we'll also be crowning
our midsummer queen!
You do realize encouraging girls to fight
over a meaningless trophy
is an archaically gendered activity?
Oh, there's something
for the boys too, Alex.
Our queen will choose her king.
[all chuckling]
And this hetero-normative courting ritual
somehow makes it better?
Yeah, it'll be fun.
[campers laughing]
But we need some volunteers
to help get everything ready, so
see me to sign up.
And have a think
who you want as your queen.
[indistinct chatter]
So this is what the makeover
and charm offensive are about.
From queen bee to Queen Mia.
Please.
Entering a popularity contest
is strictly for try-hards.
I don't wanna win.
I just want Amber to lose.
So I need someone who can beat her.
I'm going to tell everybody
that they have to vote for you.
[Dev] Hey, Mia.
I'm in charge of lighting for the party,
so I need a team of the best
and brightest to help me.
Let me guess
you want to me to light up your day?
Something like that, yeah.
You just need to flick a switch.
It's tempting
but I'm in the middle of something.
Maybe I'll see you later
when it's time to turn things on.
[indistinct chatter]
[chatter continues]
[rustling]
[girl] Hi!
Sorry. Didn't mean to make you jump.
It's okay, I just
Why are you sitting in a tree?
Who doesn't want to sit in a tree?
You're right. Sitting in trees is good.
Told ya.
I'm Petal.
And, yes, that is my real name.
I'm Alex.
So, how come you're here
and not back at camp for midsummer lols?
I said I'd collect flowers
to make garlands for the party.
I'm sorry, but "Petal" wandering
round the woods, collecting flowers?
[chuckles] I know, I know.
Talk about nominative determinism.
-When your name is your destiny--
-I know what it means.
What about you?
What were you doing, wandering around?
-Did you lose something?
-Only my mind.
There's a strange crack in the ground
like something clawed its way out.
And, yesterday, I heard weird growling.
Sounds creepy.
I wanna see it.
[upbeat music playing faintly]
When we're done with the lights,
we should get our masks sorted.
Yeah, man. In a bit.
[exclaims] This is hot work.
[Jenna laughing]
Picnic freakout girl! Can I help you?
It's Mia, and no,
I came to see if I could help you.
We're good.
I didn't mean with the food. Can we talk?
[music continues]
How's the campaign going?
To be midsummer queen
[scoffs] Yeah, right.
A moldy twig crown and the chance to pick
one of these immature boys as king?
-I have a boyfriend and he's--
-Yeah, yeah, Stefan the college boy.
But I've seen you doing
little stop and chats all around camp.
You want that moldy crown.
You seem to know a lot about me.
Are you writing a book?
That's just what I would say.
I know you because I am you.
-Then why aren't you running for queen?
-I can't beat Amber.
Not after she made it look like
I dropped her in the river.
Well, I guess that's too bad for you.
You can't beat her, either.
Amber's still riding high
after her clifftop party.
You don't have the votes.
But I can help you get them.
You'd do that just so Amber loses?
That is so petty.
I love it.
Slay, queen.
-All right there, Brendan?
-Yeah.
Jenna was right.
You do have great abs.
Don't tell her I told you,
but she says they're fit for a king.
Dev, did you hear that?
[Alex] It's probably nothing,
or a badger's sett like Dave said.
Yeah, or it could be the sea echoing
through a fault line.
Yeah, that could make sense.
What is that?
Looks like a tooth.
A human tooth.
[Brendan] Need a hand?
Sure.
So, I heard there's a vacancy for king
coming up.
Someone tall, handsome,
can bench press 100 kilos.
Any ideas?
All right, let me make this easy for you.
Imagine all of this with a crown.
Brendan, there's no guarantee
I'm going to be queen.
There's a whole camp of people
to choose from.
Nah! I mean, some of the others
might vote for Jenna
-Jenna?
-Yeah, Jenna.
I told her she can go campaigning
all she wants,
but I'm Queen Amber all the way.
Could have been a fossil, right?
Or a squirrel’s tooth?
[Petal] I don't know.
I'm not up on my squirrel dentistry.
Oh, here's one you'll like.
Maybe Paleolithic hunters lived on
this island and one was buried there.
Then centuries later,
a tree grew up through his grave
and pushed out his teeth like daisies.
I do like it. It sounds possible.
You love a rational explanation,
don't you?
You're less keen
on the mystery and wonder.
But that's the fun part.
What?
[Alex] Creepy, old building.
More fun.
Hey.
It's Julia, right?
Jenna.
As in, "All Hail Queen Jenna."
You're running for queen?
"Running" implies I'm breaking a sweat.
What do you want?
To say good luck. You're very confident.
I'm just doing what comes naturally.
My dads always say
I was born for the spotlight.
Anyway, you can stop
the whole undercover questioning thing.
I know you're running, too.
-I wouldn't put it like that.
-Right.
And you think
everyone's just gonna vote for you
'cause you're so fabulous?
May the best woman win.
So, no hard feelings.
You've done
such a great job with the food,
I'd hate for you to be disappointed
After all,
it's the taking part that counts.
[Petal] Witches' hideout.
[Alex] Top security prison.
[Petal] Secret entrance to Hogwarts!
Satanic cult headquarters.
[groans] Yours are all so sinister.
Why can't it be something fun?
[Alex] Does that say "fun" to you?
It's what's on the inside that counts.
What we have here
is our own little hideaway.
I bet no one else even knows it exists.
You had a secret tree house
as a kid, didn't you?
-[Petal] Didn't you?
-Secret attic.
Of course, my secret attic had a door.
Seriously, what's up with this island?
Who spat in your cake mix?
Amber is going down!
I thought you were a manipulative
But she is so much worse!
That's 'cause I use my powers for good.
Well, less evil.
Who does she think she is?
I told you, this is what she does!
Don't let her psych you out.
I've got the hipster guys,
the sporty girls,
and most of the lone wolves
all voting for you.
I think we got this!
So, now, what?
Now, we make you look like a queen.
Well, that's not gonna be hard.
Hey! What do you reckon for tonight?
Blue shirt, yeah?
Never mind the shirts.
Look what I just found in the storeroom!
Yeah, they were dirty at first,
but once I picked off the spiders,
not bad!
Yeah, I'm not gonna wear those.
I already got us these.
Mate, they're sparkly. I thought you were
trying to impress Kayleigh?
Yeah, look, you can have the wolf.
Look at this guy! King of the jungle!
That's a lion.
You know what? Fine.
Whatever. Suit yourself.
We'll see who looks stupid.
Great shirt, by the way.
Brings out your eyes.
[Alex] I don't get it.
There must be some way in!
Recognize that?
[Alex] Perfect.
I woke up obsessing
about one weird-y mystery thing
and now I'm going back with two more.
This is gonna drive you nuts, isn't it?
How are you not bothered?
Like I said, life's more fun
with a little bit of mystery.
Let's head back.
I don't wanna miss the party.
Right. Mystery number four.
Why everyone loses their minds
over a crown made of twigs and glitter?
[upbeat dance music playing]
You know, there's kinda no point
making a big entrance
if the party's over when we arrive.
[Jenna] Chill! You can't rush perfection.
Okay, Glinda, eat your heart out.
What do you think?
Now, let's go wipe
the smirk off Amber's face.
[Mia giggles]
[Brendan] Whoa! Bro, I can't see.
[Zac] Just take it off.
What am I gonna wear [laughs]
[Jenna] Where's Summer Camp Barbie?
Voting opens in, like, two minutes.
[Mia] Relax.
The odds are totally in our favor.
She could ride in on a unicorn
and we would still win.
Oh, are you kidding me with that dress?
Who brings sequins to summer camp?
She is trying way too hard.
[Dave imitating fanfare]
Ladies and gentlemen, voting is now open!
You have half an hour to pick your queen!
Okay, you make one last round.
I'll go Marie Antoinette
and hit them with free cake.
Really, "Marie Antoinette"?
She's your reference for winning?
She is a queen and fashion icon.
The rest is detail.
[Mia sighs]
[Jenna laughs] Vote for Jenna.
Hey, Dev. Vote for Jenna.
-[indistinct chatter]
-[Jenna] Vote for Jenna
Here you go, ladies.
Make sure you make the right choice.
Hi, there! Vote for Jenna!
You're welcome.
Vote for Jenna. I made them myself.
[indistinct chatter]
Amber! My favorite customer! Cake?
I wouldn't eat this.
It looks rotten.
Don't eat it! Don't eat it!
[Mia] Jenna, what are you doing?
[Jenna sobbing]
Jenna!
Leave me alone, okay?
I know I've ruined it all,
but I don't care.
Just leave me alone.
Jenna what happened?
You'll think I'm crazy.
I won't think you're crazy!
I think you acted kind of crazy.
The food, it looked
I don't know
I must have imagined it.
It's never happened to me before!
I must have low blood sugar or something.
Hey
Today was a lot of pressure. It's okay.
No, it's not!
We've lost.
And now everyone thinks I'm insane.
Who cares what they think?
Come on, there's a party.
And if we're gonna be marooned
with these losers all summer,
then we deserve a party.
[inhales sharply]
[Mags] Okay, everybody.
It's time to announce our queen!
[cheering]
The votes are in and we have a winner!
This year
the queen of midsummer is
-Amber!
-[campers cheering and applauding]
What did I say? Amber wins.
Congratulations, Amber
It's not over till it's over.
Thank you. Everyone.
This means so much.
I know tonight is going to be amazing.
Oh, and stay tuned
'cause later
-she'll be announcing our king!
-[campers exclaim]
[campers applaud]
It's not about who's queen.
It's about who's king.
Told you it wasn't over.
[dance music playing]
No.
Ooh, baby
Ooh, baby ♪
Tell me how you feel ♪
[clamoring]
-Come on!
-[music continues]
[Mags] How long do you think
we have to stand here for?
-Last year, it was a late one.
-Ah.
I've been doing this for a long time.
-We've got a good bunch this year.
-Yeah. Yeah.
I'm sure we could risk
just leaving them to it.
Maybe I could give you that guitar lesson?
[music continues]
-Hey.
-Hey.
I have a proposition for you.
Wanna get out of here?
I wanna show you something.
In the woods?
[narrator] The best thing about growing up
is you finally have the power
to make your dreams come true.
But if those dreams are snatched away
be ready for the nightmare.
[theme song playing]
Who are you? ♪
Who are you? ♪