The Girls on the Bus (2024) s01e03 Episode Script
The Audacity of Nope
1
Come on, Dad, get with the jive ♪
Let's let 'em know that we're alive ♪
Until the break of dawn ♪
We'll yell for more, more, more ♪
Gonna live it up and tear it down ♪
You don't get
into journalism to get rich,
but we have a different
kind of currency to trade
secrets.
It's a real rush to be in on secrets
that the masters of the universe
don't want you to know
and then expose them to the world.
But, uh, keeping our own secrets buried,
we kind of suck at that.
I had a dodgy burner phone
that could lead to an explosive story
and a regrettable booty call
that could ruin my career.
So where do you go
when you've got secrets
to bury and sin to cover up?
When you hold me tight,
ooh, wee, what ya do to me ♪
Vegas, baby.
Got a lot of rhythm in my soul ♪
[PHONE VIBRATES] Bruce, hey.
You get an answer from Walker yet?
Why does she want to be president?
- We need a response.
- I'm I'm so close.
Sadie, it's a simple question.
We need a response from every candidate.
You know, Dale he's
already gotten his answer
from the front runner.
I'm trying, but she's
not taking questions.
She won't even tell
us her Dunkin' order.
[SIGHS] Well, keep trying.
Anything on the burner?
[SOFTLY] I have been checking it
every 30 seconds for the last week.
You don't think I'd tell you if it rang?
I got nada, no messages.
I can't even figure out the number.
Use it to call your
own phone, then if you
Thank you. Thank you so much
for mansplaining phones to me.
I obviously tried that.
It says no caller ID.
See if you can get Special Projects
to look into the burner phone.
Keep me posted if they find any leads.
Bye.
[UPBEAT MUSIC]
[PEOPLE CHEERING, MACHINES RINGING]
Eric, I'm sorry, but, I mean,
it's just not a good time.
The primary's in two days.
It is never a good time.
Are we supposed to wait
till after the inauguration
to get the invites out?
Yes?
[LAUGHS]
Okay, look, I'm sorry.
It looks like Walker's doing
pooled events tomorrow,
so I should have some time
to hang out at the hotel
and get some invites done, okay?
I will do it.
I love you.
Love you, too.
It's not going to happen.
[SCOFFS]
It's a fine line between being
queen of the scoop
and queen of being all up in
other people's business, huh?
Just offering friendly advice
to someone who's been mostly
happily married for a very long time,
aside from a brief breakup in '96,
but I blame Ross Perot for that.
- Hmm.
- It doesn't matter.
The point is, you can't be
on call for him.
Text in the morning, text at night,
emoji in the afternoon if you must,
and maybe a tit pic on your anniversary.
- Hmm.
[PHONE VIBRATING]
[PHONE CHIMES]
Did you just ignore a call
from your daughter?
She's been blowing off
my calls for weeks,
and John Ralston just
released a new poll.
- Oh, shoot.
- I'll call her back.
"Hollywood action star and
elder statesman locked in a tie."
How is that even possible?
Maybe because no one gives a
shit about experience anymore.
I have known that man since I was four
and he was White House Chief of Staff.
He's a good person
and a devoted public servant
who has survived for decades
in politics.
It is humiliating
that he even has to run
against a guy who's famous for wearing
a latex onesie.
Sadie, I just got this email.
Do you know what it means?
Well, looks like we are spending the day
in the pool tomorrow.
Oh. Amazing.
Hey, can I get to round
of Patrón for the girls?
- Uh, no.
- What?
No. Rule number four
no tequila the night
before an early call time.
- Oh, come on.
- Whatever!
What is the point of being
in Vegas on an expense account
if you can't let loose?
I let loose. I booked a facial.
One toast to overthrowing
elitist corporate media.
- Not toasting to that.
- Come on!
- Grace, it's just one!
- Okay, fine, fine.
One shot to be stuck on that
bus with you crazy bitches.
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
Mm.
- [ALARM RINGING]
- [GASPS]
Oh, God.
Oh, fuck, the charger!
[LIGHT MUSIC]
♪
If you ring while I am gone,
I'll fucking kill you.
[INDISTINCT CHATTER]
We're live in Las Vegas,
where two of the leading
Democratic candidates,
one of whom is simply too old
to be in the race,
are slugging it out.
Is this a campaign or "Cocoon"?
I think what is clear here
is that the Democrats
would rather fight each other
because they have no plan
to fight for the middle class.
Yes, you are killing it.
Greta said ratings haven't been
this high since that segment
on preschoolers in Portland
doing a terrorist fist jab
during the pledge.
[LAUGHS] Let's give the
people what they want.
[INDISTINCT CHATTER]
Okay, on background, the Senator
will be making several
retail stops today
to speak to real Nevadans
As opposed to fake Nevadans?
About real solutions.
Uh, our first OTR will be
Walk, walk, walk,
walk, what I talk, talk ♪
Big Tay Money, bitch, I walk
what I talk, bitch, I ♪
Walk, walk, walk ♪
[LAUGHS] I didn't
realize we were including
influencers in the pool.
We prefer content creators, cunt.
Okay.
Uh [CHUCKLES]
What what the hell are you wearing?
Don't fat-shame me.
You don't have to be
a size 2 to be smoking.
No, why are you wearing a bikini?
Because you said
we're in the pool today.
No, no, Lola, we we are
not going to a pool,
we are the pool
protective press pool.
[INDISTINCT CHATTER]
Oh, right, right, right,
right, right, right, right.
Like, corporate-media talk
and all that bullshit.
Um, what does that mean?
Okay, come with me.
We're going to Yeah.
Thank you so much.
The, uh the pool is a rotating group.
Let's go out here.
The pool is, uh is a rotating
group of reporters
that follow the candidate
wherever they go
when there's not enough room
for all of us.
So, like, one reporter reps print
- You. That's you.
- Yes.
Thank you for knowing what I do.
Another reps broadcast,
one for digital, et cetera.
Our job is to protect
the rest of the media
so they don't miss out in case
something major happens.
Like in '63, when JFK was
shot and LBJ was sworn in,
the pool was there.
9/11, when George Bush kept reading
with schoolchildren while
the Twin Towers were burning.
Fuck. That's heavy.
Yeah.
Look, Lola, I-I respect
the shit out of you
wanting to change the game.
Fuck corporate media all of it.
I-I love it.
But maybe, maybe learn the rules
before you break them?
[SIGHS] Yeah, I hear that.
No, where is the van?
We're going to miss the motorcade.
No, it was the 2000 RNC, Philly.
- Hmm. New York City, 2004.
- Right. Right, the reelection.
- Mm-hmm.
- I thought Karl Rove
was going to choke on his cheesecake
when you reached out for comment.
Then Cheney comes in
and threatens to sue you,
and I hear this polite but
firm voice say,
oh, please do, Mr. Vice President.
BOTH: That would make one
hell of a follow-up.
- [LAUGHTER, PHONE VIBRATES]
- It would have.
Do you need to get that?
All good.
[SIGHS] Why am I here, John?
You know he's the man for the job.
He needs you to write this piece.
Grace, he asked for you personally.
Rambo cannot win the nomination.
You know I don't do portraiture.
I know.
If you want a puff piece on your boss,
I'll need something in return.
You'll get it.
Do this for us,
and you'll always have a friend
in the campaign
and in the White House.
The strength of our country
has always been
that despite our problems,
we work together
- to move forward
- Yeah.
- Because our tomorrow
- ALL: Begins today.
[GROANS] Yeah.
[APPLAUSE]
I'm literally dying right now.
Told you. Pool is boring AF.
[PHONE CHIMES]
I hope you've had a chance
to enjoy the breakfast
and pastries out of this world.
You have one new message. [LINE BEEPS]
Sadie McCarthy,
it's your favorite mayor.
You promised me a profile
if I was still in by Nevada.
So what do you say?
- Hi, nice to meet you.
- Nice to meet you.
Oh.
Senator Walker, Senator Walker,
why do you want to be president?
Very exciting.
Senator, one question
for "The Sentinel."
Why do you want to be
Every other candidate has answered.
Senator! Senator!
Do you have time for some
questions for lasvegaist.com?
- Yeah, sure.
- Huh.
Well, she's not ignoring that guy.
Welcome to Las Vegas.
Uh, so how do you plan to help
small businesses?
Are you fucking serious?
You know, if you want
to put in a formal request,
- we can find some time
- I don't need your help.
Loading. On background.
The next OTR will be
at a YMCA in Henderson,
where the Senator will be
speaking to real Nevadans
about real solutions.
All right.
Mr. Mayor?
Hi, yes. Where should I meet you?
Yeah, got it.
Okay, I'll be there. Thank you.
- Hey, what are you doing?
- I'm out of here.
You saw that shit she's
deliberately fucking with me.
Enjoy that lasvegaist.com
bounce, because "The Sentinel"
is late to profile a candidate
who actually talks to me.
Okay, wait, Sadie, we can leave?
- Can I leave?
- No, you can't leave.
You have to stay, in
case something happens.
But nothing's going to happen.
Okay, bye.
Yo, Bruce, Walker's still
ignoring me and being boring,
so I'm catching an Uber
to work on a Styles story.
I'm calling it "Portrait of a Candidate
Who Doesn't Stand a Chance."
Yeah, I think so, too.
Greta says they're loving
your takedowns of Grandpa.
- Keep them coming.
- I mean, it's not personal.
His foreign policy is why
no one respects us anymore
- and his domestic agenda
- Uh-huh. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
Cal Swanson want you on
primetime tomorrow night.
- What? Are you serious?
- Primary night! Yeah.
Okay. Yes, got it.
- Thank you.
- BOTH: Oh, my God!
This is this is huge!
Okay, but we got to prep big-time
because Greta says Cal's
not afraid to eat his own,
so I'm going to grab my stuff
I'll meet you in 20?
No, 15. We have a lot of work to do.
- Cal fucking Swanson?
- Cal fucking Swanson!
- You have officially arrived!
- [LAUGHS] Oh, my God.
Okay. Okay. [BREATHES DEEPLY]
[DOOR BEEPS]
Hey, baby.
Hey Eric, hi!
What what are you doing
what are you doing here?
- [DOOR CLOSES]
- I wanted to surprise you.
Mission accomplished.
Hi.
Mmm, mmm.
Mm, hold up. Just a second.
Just a second.
Hey, um, Gary?
Yeah, can we, um
can we make that an hour?
Okay, bye.
- An hour?
- Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
♪
- Look at this.
- Oh, my God.
[BOTH CHUCKLE] I remember that dress.
Yeah, the Easter Egg Roll.
Your dad was the White House
correspondent at "The Post"
- biggest pain in my ass.
- Mine too.
[CHUCKLES] John, figure out
how to send this to her.
Will do.
And how is, uh how is Charlie?
And your daughter Annie, right?
Charlie's been away for months.
- Finally finishing his book
- [CHUCKLES]
And Annie is a freshman at Northwestern.
- Wow.
- Mm-hmm.
- I remember when she was born.
- I had to leave the G6 early.
[BOTH CHUCKLE]
All right, Mr. Secretary,
uh, here we go.
Look, in today's economy,
we should be making it easier,
not harder, for folks to join a union.
And for those hardworking Americans
who can't join unions
Since Walker was icing me out,
I decided to focus on another candidate.
Hot white guy may not have
stood a chance at winning,
and listening to him drone on
about unions
wasn't particularly exciting,
but, hey, at least
I was enjoying the view.
Doubled!
If you're horny, let's do it?
Ride it, my pony. My saddle is waiting.
[GINUWINE'S "PONY"] [PEOPLE CHEERING]
Yeah, yeah ♪
Yeah, yeah, yeah ♪
I'm just a bachelor ♪
I'm looking for a partner ♪
If you're horny, let's do it ♪
Ride it, my pony ♪
My saddle's waiting ♪
Come and jump on it ♪
[PHONE VIBRATES]
As I've traveled around your state,
I've met tons of hardworking
people who are working more
and more hours and bringing home
smaller and smaller paychecks
Please tell me Special Projects
has made progress on my burner.
Not yet, but we did get an
anonymous call on the tip line.
- It's about Walker.
- Tip line?
Are you kidding me?
Do you not remember last cycle?
They claimed she was running
a cannibal operation
- out of a steakhouse.
- Yeah.
Well, Prime Rib Gate
was not our finest moment.
Just listen.
[DEEP VOICE] This message
is for Sadie McCarthy.
I've been reading your articles.
Walker is not who you think she is.
I have credible evidence
of widespread wrongdoing
that will engulf her campaign.
That's it? How do we know
that this person isn't just
another crackpot?
We don't. That's your job.
He left a number, so write this down.
202-555-0198.
Okay, got it. Bye.
Paper of Record. Hey, there.
Hi!
- Did you catch any of that?
- Yeah, totally.
- Labor unions, so important.
- So important, exactly.
Well, look, I'm glad I finally
got you to a campaign event.
- Should we walk and talk?
- Let's.
- Yeah, let's do it.
- Great.
[SIGHS AND GROANS HAPPILY]
- That was necessary.
- [GIGGLES]
- Hey, I missed you.
- Mm, I missed you, too.
[PHONE VIBRATES]
- I am so happy you came.
- [CHUCKLES]
And I have so much work to do.
Mm-hmm
No, but, really, I have a lot of work.
Oh.
Yeah.
Oh.
I'm I'm sorry.
It's just, on the phone, you
said you had time
- to, you know, look over venues.
- No, no, yeah, I know.
- I said that, but
- Okay.
So maybe, like, united front, you know?
Look over some venues and menus.
Team up to get my mother off our backs.
[CHUCKLES]
What if what if we
just got married right now?
There's a chapel downstairs
I'm serious.
- [LAUGHS]
- It could be really romantic.
What do you say?
Will you be the Elvis to my Priscilla?
So let me get this straight.
We rented out Lucien
for your half-birthday,
and now you want to get married
at a drive-through wedding window?
No.
Obviously if you don't want to
do it, we don't have to do it.
Do you not want to get married?
I didn't Of course I want
to get married.
I didn't say I didn't
want to get married.
I've waited eight years to marry you.
Yeah, so
which is why
I wanted it to be, you know
Yeah.
No, you're you're right.
It was a crazy idea.
I'll make time today.
- So we're doing this?
- Yes.
We're doing this.
[SOFT MUSIC]
♪
Well, we have to do our part to ensure
that we have the capabilities
and the skills to be competitive.
I'm sorry, but I have
to ask what do you say
to allegations that
you don't have the stamina
to be commander in chief?
We almost done here?
We have a meeting
with the SEIU at 3:00, so
- Oh, yeah.
- Of course.
It was, uh, lovely seeing you.
[CHUCKLES]
And please do send me that picture.
- Give my best to your family.
- And yours.
Are we on time? Okay, let's go.
[DOOR OPENS, CLOSES]
What the fuck was that?
Why were his hands so shaky?
That was off the record.
- I'm writing it.
- Writing what?
So the man gets tired.
He works 20 hour days talking nonstop
Sell it to someone else.
I'm not buying it, John.
Well, what will it take
for you to get off this?
You have 12 hours
to get me his medical records,
or I run with it.
And I don't just want
a friend in the White House,
I want a fucking soul mate.
You will give me the Veep
scoop and every other scoop.
If he fires the White House florist,
I better be the first to know.
[DRAMATIC MUSIC]
If real Nevadans work hard
and play by the rules,
you should be able to get ahead
and stay ahead.
I understand that real Nevadans
have real problems.
My only real problem
is uppity, bra-burning bitches like her.
[LAUGHTER, INDISTINCT CHATTER]
As president, I will ensure
equal pay for equal work.
No woman who works
full-time should have
A woman's place is in the kitchen.
[ANGRY CHATTER]
Sir, do you have a question for me?
More of a comment.
Feminists destroyed this country,
destroyed the family
milking me for child-support checks
when they should be making me dinner
at the end of a long day.
- What the fuck?
- Right.
It's bra-burning feminists like me
who are responsible for
the demise of this country.
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
[ANGRY CHATTER]
Or it's men like you,
who think you're special
because you were born with a dick.
I'm a motherfucking
woman, baby, all right ♪
I don't need a man ♪
- Okay.
- Where are you going?
I'm a motherfucking woman ♪
I'm in the kitchen where I belong.
[LAUGHING]
And I'm just getting started.
Do what I want, say what you say ♪
I work real hard every day ♪
I run this shit, baby,
I run this shit ♪
[CROWD GASPS]
Don't touch my weave,
don't call me honey ♪
I run this shit, baby,
I run this shit ♪
Ooh ♪
I'm a motherfucking
woman, baby, all right ♪
[ALARM RINGING]
I don't need a man
to be holding me too tight ♪
Mm, yeah ♪
So, uh so you really think
that people will vote for a mayor
who's never held higher elected office?
You have virtually
zero name recognition.
- That's what you're for.
- Touché.
[CHUCKLES] [PHONE CHIMES]
- Excuse me.
- Mm-hmm.
[CLEARS THROAT]
I'm in the kitchen where I belong.
What?
- Is everything okay?
- Um, yeah.
I can't believe she
finally did something cool
and I fucking missed it.
It wasn't as cool as it looked, right?
Yo, Twitter is so fucked up.
Chris Cillizza is calling it
a deep fake,
and Chuck Todd just tweeted
that it was a craven campaign stunt.
Why are all these guys
saying that it was staged?
They always they always
do that shit to her.
Nothing nothing can be spontaneous.
Everything is cold, hard calculation.
Was it staged?
Did she plant that guy?
Were there nipples?
- Oh, there were nipples.
- Oh, goddamn.
They were low-key perfect,
and it was fucking amazing.
It happened really fast,
but I was there, dude.
The vibe was really real.
Then then you have to prove it.
It's all you can do.
- Why would anyone trust me?
- They don't trust any of us.
That's called being the media.
But but as journalists,
we have to tell the readers
what actually happened,
even when they don't want to believe it,
even when we don't want to believe it.
So how do I prove it?
Interview Walker.
I-I wish I could, but I'm not on
pool duty tomorrow, and she
she hates me.
Get her to tell you on
the record that it was legit.
Right. Okay.
Yeah, I can do that.
- Yeah.
- I think.
Are you sure you want that whole bar?
I thought you were body positive.
- It's dark chocolate, low fat.
- Body neutral, and buckle up.
There's five milligrams in each square.
[QUIRKY MUSIC]
♪
Shit.
Annie Annie Annie, sweetie, I-I
you were talking too fast,
and I can't understand
what the hell you're saying.
- Are you hurt?
- No. I
- Have you been attacked?
- I haven't been attacked.
Okay, so so then what is the issue?
[PHONE BEEPS]
That is what I'm trying
to tell you. Can we
Shit, sweetie. I got to call you back.
John, what have you got for me?
- [LINE BEEPING]
- Fuck!
Hey, it's me. Uh, wanting to
let you know
I've called this stupid number
from the tip line,
like, 10 times, and it rings to nowhere.
It's a bullshit tip. Call me.
[ELEVATOR BELL DINGS]
Oh, you got to be fucking kidding me.
Where were you today?
I, uh I had another story to work on.
Look, am am I missing something?
Is this because of what happened?
Did you bail on pool duty
because you're mad at me?
Jesus Christ,
not everything is about you.
You think I wanted to miss that?
You could have called me
and told me to get there.
You could have you could
have told me a lot of things,
but you didn't.
What the hell is that supposed to mean?
Doesn't mean a damn thing,
just like what
happened between you and me.
Okay. There it is. [DOOR BEEPS]
Look, I thought it was a one-time thing.
[DOOR BEEPS] Sadie, will you just
If I had known you were
her press secretary,
I never would have
I could lose my job
if anyone ever found out,
and you knew that.
I was unemployed
when I came to your room.
- I swear.
- Uh-huh.
I had an interview
earlier that afternoon.
I-I bombed it. I never thought
I'd get the job.
[DOOR BEEPS]
I would blow a bellman for
a real key right now.
Even the appearance
of a female journalist
sleeping with a source,
I'd be destroyed,
never mind that men have been
fucking whoever they wanted
since the dawn of journalism
and fucking.
[DOOR BEEPS]
Oh, God.
[DOOR BEEPS] Hallelujah.
[SIGHS]
[GROANS]
[CLEARS THROAT]
[MYSTERIOUS ELECTRONIC MUSIC]
♪
[PHONE RINGING]
♪
What the
♪
Fuck.
Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck.
Fuck!
Aah!
Bruce, Bruce, the
number the tipster left
is the burner phone,
which means the tip is real.
It's like "inside the house" real.
This guy knows where I am,
which means he might work for Walker
or at least have her official schedule,
which also means
he might know other things.
Um, I'm freaking out.
Uh, what do we do?
Call me.
♪
What do I do?
In a den of thieves, the only final sin
is stupidity.
[EVIL LAUGHTER]
[GROANS]
This is so scary.
♪
Shit. Sadie, where are you at?
I need to get to Walker,
but her schedules aren't in English.
FPPO what does that mean?
For peaceful people only?
Call me.
For planning purposes only.
- Hi.
- Hi.
What are we planning?
Uh, that's what FPPO stands
for in campaign schedules.
- I couldn't help but overhear.
- Oh, right.
No. I know that. I'm a journalist.
Lola, right?
I follow you on TikTok. Uh, I'm Josie.
I'm an organizer.
For my candidate crush, right?
I thought you looked familiar.
I was at that house party y'all
threw last week in Portsmouth.
Yeah, I told the team to invite you.
[CHUCKLES]
Uh, so what are you working on?
Okay, so I need a follow-up
with Felicity Walker,
but I have no idea
what any of this means.
And if I ask her campaign, I'm
going to sound like an idiot.
And if I ask the press corps,
they'll just
they hate me.
Why would you think they hate you?
Public radio told me to kill myself.
- So mostly that.
- Yeah, that's clear.
[BOTH LAUGH] Um
- okay, well, can I take a look?
- Yeah, please.
Okay. First of all, it's called a sked.
- Nobody calls it a schedule.
- Okay, sked got it.
Mm-hmm. Uh, OTR, that's
an off-the-record stop.
But it's not actually off the record,
it's just off the official
sked, also known as an OTC
opportunity to crash.
Okay, hold up. Hold up.
Okay. MOU is a memorandum
of understanding
that you'll pay your own way.
F&F is when the press gets
time to file and feed.
RON is short for room overnight,
as in, where are you sleeping tonight?
Oh.
So, where are we RON'ing tonight?
[UPBEAT FUNK MUSIC]
♪
Primary Day
the day we've been working
toward for months.
The candidates have spoken.
The voters have made their choices.
That means that until results
start to come in,
campaign reporters have something
we almost never have
free time.
♪
- [PHONE VIBRATES]
- [INHALES SHARPLY]
Sorry, uh, I have to take this.
I am about to hit send.
- I need to see you.
- Where?
Ninth-floor elevators.
You won't regret it.
- I'll be there.
- It's good, Grace.
Yeah, it better be fucking good.
[INDISTINCT CHATTER]
- There you are.
- Hey.
So I booked us a couple's
massage at 2:00 p.m.
How's that sound? Does that work?
Um, no, actually.
Did you not see what
Walker did yesterday?
Yeah, your lady lost her shit. So what?
I am Liberty Direct's
Walker beat reporter,
and the Republican leadership
is already calling
for an investigation into #BraGhazi
and whether she violated
any fire-safety laws.
I have two primetime primary-night hits
and Cal Swanson, aka the
highest rated talk show on TV.
All good. All good.
I just thought some self-care
would be nice, right?
Obviously work is
stressing you out, so
[SCOFFS] Work is not stressing me out.
- You are stressing me out.
- Me?
You and your mom and her party planners
and demands and 75 emails
about peonies and canapés
and crap nobody will remember
that's stressing me out.
So, if you will excuse me,
I have work to do.
[ELEVATOR BELL DINGS]
- Hey.
- Hey.
These are the medical records?
Better.
All right, I'm filing.
Why tell you that he's got
the stamina of a 25-year-old
when I can show you?
Mr. Secretary?
He's running the Vegas 5K.
[SCOFFS]
Grace.
Good luck.
- See you at the finish line.
- Yes.
[QUIRKY MUSIC]
[ELEVATOR BELL DINGS]
Dale, hey.
Oh, I won't die if I live in Georgetown,
but I hear the food
on Air Force One is terrible.
Please. Pretty please.
She is not taking questions
from reporters right now.
That's gas, 'cause
I'm not a real reporter.
I want quote approval, and you
have to embargo until polls close.
100% no problem,
except I can't guarantee quote approval.
And, also, uh, w-what does embargo mean?
What do you mean by that?
Ten minutes after our last OTR.
- Got it.
- Wait.
But I got one more condition for you.
For the love of God, can you get
her to answer Sadie's question?
- Yeah.
- Great.
I don't know how you
convinced me of that.
Now, Kimberlyn, what do you make
of Felicity Walker
stamping out free speech
in the name of sexism?
Well, Cal, I think
what we're witnessing here
is a candidate having
an unprofessional meltdown.
Whoa. Hang on a second. Unprofessional?
She destroyed property.
- Jesus, can you let me talk?
- Cal isn't going to.
Your answers need to be sharper.
What have you been doing all day?
Next question.
You know, the media mocked me
for skipping New Hampshire,
but I wanted to be here
talking with you.
In my opinion, Vegas is the
most honest city in America.
[PHONE RINGING]
Half meritocracy, half crapshoot
that is what our economy has become
to so many hardworking people.
Politicians in Washington,
they want to blame you
for their failures, but
the people of Nevada,
you guys know better you know
- Hello?
- Hey, it's me.
Oh, my God. Can you please
not call me on this thing?
It's it's freaking me out.
They could be listening, you know?
You called me 15 times
in the middle of the night.
I think I deserve to see for myself.
So what do we do?
How do I reach the source if
if his number is the burner?
We wait.
The data team has a source in the NSA,
and they're running the number.
So, if we get anything,
I'll let you know.
And if the tipster calls back,
we'll be ready to trace the number.
In the meantime, you have a primary
and #BraGhazi to cover.
So what's the fallout
from the Walker campaign?
I'm, uh I'm r-reporting that out.
Tie your Walker reporting
to your state-of-the-race?
You know, Dale
Dale's with the old man.
If he wins tonight, his party's going
- to be forced to fall in line.
- [SCOFFS]
And he will be the inevitable nominee.
And Dale will be the inevitable
White House correspondent.
Great. Thank you.
[APPLAUSE]
Hey, hey.
♪
Sources say
the former Secretary of State
and Democratic stalwart is
recovering with his family
after briefly losing consciousness
at the Vegas
Blazin' Rock N' Roll 5K Run.
The incident comes as exit polls give
the three-time presidential
candidate a resounding lead
over his celebrity opponent.
Senator Felicity Walker
is in third place,
bolstered by a late surge
of support from women
what pollsters are calling "Bra Bump."
Dale, when are you filing?
His campaign said he's just dehydrated.
It happens. He's still going
to be the nominee.
I am covering the White House.
Another thing you missed.
Yes, I am writing it for the front.
Oh, um, hey, how's
that Styles story coming?
[LAUGHS] How's the food
on Spirit Airlines, Dale?
[LAUGHS MOCKINGLY]
No, I'm not laughing at you.
♪
I-I have to rewrite
my state-of-the-race.
- I can't help you right now.
- I don't need help.
I got an interview with Walker.
Thank you. Thanks so much.
I really needed to feel worse
about my life choices right now.
Here, I got her to answer
your trick question.
Unlike that Ted Kennedy dude,
she actually had a pretty good answer.
What is this?
You got it? How?
I'm texting you the audio.
I can't I can't accept this.
Nope, never, never share a scoop.
- Have I taught you nothing?
- Chill.
It's not my scoop.
Her preppy press secretary
made me ask your question
as a precondition.
I think he wants to bang you
or something.
See ya.
Cal, I'm coming to you live
from Las Vegas,
where the Democratic
frontrunner has just proven
to the world he is too old and frail
to be the next president.
Cal, I think we can both agree,
no matter how the vote turns
out here, he is simply unfit.
[SIREN WAILING]
[INDISTINCT CHATTER]
Hello.
- No.
- John.
Excuse me.
Hey. How how'd you know we were here?
I know a lot of things. How is he?
Uh, we'll release a statement soon.
Come on, I'm not here as a journalist.
I'm here as a friend.
[SIGHS] It was a massive blockage
to his coronary artery.
They did everything they could.
He's going to be okay, right?
Does he have to drop out?
Because the exit polls
look really good for him.
- Grace
- That Hollywood cheeseball
is in second, but a win here
gives him the delegates
Grace
he's gone.
I'm sorry.
He's gone. Um, wait here.
I'll I'll let you know
when you can run it, okay?
[KATE BOLLINGER'S
"LADY IN THE DARKEST HOUR"]
[EXHALES SHARPLY]
♪
[SIGHS, BREATHES SHAKILY]
♪
Walt, um, I've got some breaking news.
Can't say just yet.
Alert the desk?
Yes.
It will impact the primary.
It, it is ♪
It's all right ♪
♪
[PHONE CHIMES]
It, it ♪
Holy shit.
It all gets better with time ♪
♪
You okay?
I spent weeks tearing that man down.
I made fun of him for being old.
Twitter is calling me
Kimberlyn Kevorkian.
You need to block those trolls.
You were just doing your job.
And you are great at it.
I know it's important to you.
Lady in the darkest hour ♪
Which got me thinking
You know, if this, uh
wedding stuff
is stressing you out so much
♪
Maybe we should elope.
No.
I don't want that.
I want to honor what we have,
and I want our friends
and family to see me marry you,
preferably in Vera Wang. [BOTH LAUGH]
♪
Things couldn't stay, but change ♪
Wait, wait, wait.
Is that grapefruit essential oils?
Hmm. You know it is.
♪
Then the outside peels away ♪
[CHUCKLES]
Revealing it was right ♪
♪
Do you trust that time
will be your friend? ♪
This is Annie.
Leave a message or, better yet, text me.
[LINE BEEPS]
Hi, sweetie. It's your mom.
I'm sorry I couldn't talk yesterday.
I don't know if you saw the
news, but it's been a day.
[CHUCKLES]
Anyway, I can talk now,
so call me back, yeah?
♪
Lady in the darkest hour ♪
[ELEVATOR BELL DINGS]
Smile all sweet like it isn't sour ♪
[ELEVATOR DOORS CLOSE]
♪
- So when can I see you again?
- I'll be around.
I won't quit until our girl does.
♪
Lady in the darkest hour ♪
♪
You know what they say
what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas.
It didn't happen in Vegas.
It happened in Iowa.
Sadie, I'm trying to apologize.
Huh.
You could have made it worse, you know?
Asking Lola to ask my question
I would have gotten it
out of Walker somehow.
Yeah, I-I know you
could have, eventually,
but, honestly, it was too painful
to watch you keep trying.
- [SCOFFS]
- It was. [CHUCKLES]
Hey, I'm sorry.
I-I never meant to put you
in that position.
So is this us being
strictly professional,
never speaking of what happened?
What happened? I have no
I have no idea
what you're talking about.
You're such a gifted liar.
If only there was a way
to make a career out of it.
You must leave now,
take what you need ♪
Strictly professional.
Hmm?
Only because you took my advice
and got rid of that nonsensical slogan.
Ah, you're never wrong.
- Wow, you finally got it.
- Learned it.
- [LAUGHS]
- A new headline there.
♪
The carpet. too, is folding over you ♪
♪
And it's all over now, baby blue ♪
All right.
Uh
- This way, yeah.
- This is probably
I should probably do the same thing.
My fault.
♪
[PHONE RINGING]
Yeah, yeah, yeah ♪
It's all over,
it's all over now, baby blue ♪
♪
Sadie McCarthy.
It looks like Walker
is a real contender now.
I'd say it's time you and me
had a little talk.
Greg, move your head.
Bye.
Come on, Dad, get with the jive ♪
Let's let 'em know that we're alive ♪
Until the break of dawn ♪
We'll yell for more, more, more ♪
Gonna live it up and tear it down ♪
You don't get
into journalism to get rich,
but we have a different
kind of currency to trade
secrets.
It's a real rush to be in on secrets
that the masters of the universe
don't want you to know
and then expose them to the world.
But, uh, keeping our own secrets buried,
we kind of suck at that.
I had a dodgy burner phone
that could lead to an explosive story
and a regrettable booty call
that could ruin my career.
So where do you go
when you've got secrets
to bury and sin to cover up?
When you hold me tight,
ooh, wee, what ya do to me ♪
Vegas, baby.
Got a lot of rhythm in my soul ♪
[PHONE VIBRATES] Bruce, hey.
You get an answer from Walker yet?
Why does she want to be president?
- We need a response.
- I'm I'm so close.
Sadie, it's a simple question.
We need a response from every candidate.
You know, Dale he's
already gotten his answer
from the front runner.
I'm trying, but she's
not taking questions.
She won't even tell
us her Dunkin' order.
[SIGHS] Well, keep trying.
Anything on the burner?
[SOFTLY] I have been checking it
every 30 seconds for the last week.
You don't think I'd tell you if it rang?
I got nada, no messages.
I can't even figure out the number.
Use it to call your
own phone, then if you
Thank you. Thank you so much
for mansplaining phones to me.
I obviously tried that.
It says no caller ID.
See if you can get Special Projects
to look into the burner phone.
Keep me posted if they find any leads.
Bye.
[UPBEAT MUSIC]
[PEOPLE CHEERING, MACHINES RINGING]
Eric, I'm sorry, but, I mean,
it's just not a good time.
The primary's in two days.
It is never a good time.
Are we supposed to wait
till after the inauguration
to get the invites out?
Yes?
[LAUGHS]
Okay, look, I'm sorry.
It looks like Walker's doing
pooled events tomorrow,
so I should have some time
to hang out at the hotel
and get some invites done, okay?
I will do it.
I love you.
Love you, too.
It's not going to happen.
[SCOFFS]
It's a fine line between being
queen of the scoop
and queen of being all up in
other people's business, huh?
Just offering friendly advice
to someone who's been mostly
happily married for a very long time,
aside from a brief breakup in '96,
but I blame Ross Perot for that.
- Hmm.
- It doesn't matter.
The point is, you can't be
on call for him.
Text in the morning, text at night,
emoji in the afternoon if you must,
and maybe a tit pic on your anniversary.
- Hmm.
[PHONE VIBRATING]
[PHONE CHIMES]
Did you just ignore a call
from your daughter?
She's been blowing off
my calls for weeks,
and John Ralston just
released a new poll.
- Oh, shoot.
- I'll call her back.
"Hollywood action star and
elder statesman locked in a tie."
How is that even possible?
Maybe because no one gives a
shit about experience anymore.
I have known that man since I was four
and he was White House Chief of Staff.
He's a good person
and a devoted public servant
who has survived for decades
in politics.
It is humiliating
that he even has to run
against a guy who's famous for wearing
a latex onesie.
Sadie, I just got this email.
Do you know what it means?
Well, looks like we are spending the day
in the pool tomorrow.
Oh. Amazing.
Hey, can I get to round
of Patrón for the girls?
- Uh, no.
- What?
No. Rule number four
no tequila the night
before an early call time.
- Oh, come on.
- Whatever!
What is the point of being
in Vegas on an expense account
if you can't let loose?
I let loose. I booked a facial.
One toast to overthrowing
elitist corporate media.
- Not toasting to that.
- Come on!
- Grace, it's just one!
- Okay, fine, fine.
One shot to be stuck on that
bus with you crazy bitches.
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
Mm.
- [ALARM RINGING]
- [GASPS]
Oh, God.
Oh, fuck, the charger!
[LIGHT MUSIC]
♪
If you ring while I am gone,
I'll fucking kill you.
[INDISTINCT CHATTER]
We're live in Las Vegas,
where two of the leading
Democratic candidates,
one of whom is simply too old
to be in the race,
are slugging it out.
Is this a campaign or "Cocoon"?
I think what is clear here
is that the Democrats
would rather fight each other
because they have no plan
to fight for the middle class.
Yes, you are killing it.
Greta said ratings haven't been
this high since that segment
on preschoolers in Portland
doing a terrorist fist jab
during the pledge.
[LAUGHS] Let's give the
people what they want.
[INDISTINCT CHATTER]
Okay, on background, the Senator
will be making several
retail stops today
to speak to real Nevadans
As opposed to fake Nevadans?
About real solutions.
Uh, our first OTR will be
Walk, walk, walk,
walk, what I talk, talk ♪
Big Tay Money, bitch, I walk
what I talk, bitch, I ♪
Walk, walk, walk ♪
[LAUGHS] I didn't
realize we were including
influencers in the pool.
We prefer content creators, cunt.
Okay.
Uh [CHUCKLES]
What what the hell are you wearing?
Don't fat-shame me.
You don't have to be
a size 2 to be smoking.
No, why are you wearing a bikini?
Because you said
we're in the pool today.
No, no, Lola, we we are
not going to a pool,
we are the pool
protective press pool.
[INDISTINCT CHATTER]
Oh, right, right, right,
right, right, right, right.
Like, corporate-media talk
and all that bullshit.
Um, what does that mean?
Okay, come with me.
We're going to Yeah.
Thank you so much.
The, uh the pool is a rotating group.
Let's go out here.
The pool is, uh is a rotating
group of reporters
that follow the candidate
wherever they go
when there's not enough room
for all of us.
So, like, one reporter reps print
- You. That's you.
- Yes.
Thank you for knowing what I do.
Another reps broadcast,
one for digital, et cetera.
Our job is to protect
the rest of the media
so they don't miss out in case
something major happens.
Like in '63, when JFK was
shot and LBJ was sworn in,
the pool was there.
9/11, when George Bush kept reading
with schoolchildren while
the Twin Towers were burning.
Fuck. That's heavy.
Yeah.
Look, Lola, I-I respect
the shit out of you
wanting to change the game.
Fuck corporate media all of it.
I-I love it.
But maybe, maybe learn the rules
before you break them?
[SIGHS] Yeah, I hear that.
No, where is the van?
We're going to miss the motorcade.
No, it was the 2000 RNC, Philly.
- Hmm. New York City, 2004.
- Right. Right, the reelection.
- Mm-hmm.
- I thought Karl Rove
was going to choke on his cheesecake
when you reached out for comment.
Then Cheney comes in
and threatens to sue you,
and I hear this polite but
firm voice say,
oh, please do, Mr. Vice President.
BOTH: That would make one
hell of a follow-up.
- [LAUGHTER, PHONE VIBRATES]
- It would have.
Do you need to get that?
All good.
[SIGHS] Why am I here, John?
You know he's the man for the job.
He needs you to write this piece.
Grace, he asked for you personally.
Rambo cannot win the nomination.
You know I don't do portraiture.
I know.
If you want a puff piece on your boss,
I'll need something in return.
You'll get it.
Do this for us,
and you'll always have a friend
in the campaign
and in the White House.
The strength of our country
has always been
that despite our problems,
we work together
- to move forward
- Yeah.
- Because our tomorrow
- ALL: Begins today.
[GROANS] Yeah.
[APPLAUSE]
I'm literally dying right now.
Told you. Pool is boring AF.
[PHONE CHIMES]
I hope you've had a chance
to enjoy the breakfast
and pastries out of this world.
You have one new message. [LINE BEEPS]
Sadie McCarthy,
it's your favorite mayor.
You promised me a profile
if I was still in by Nevada.
So what do you say?
- Hi, nice to meet you.
- Nice to meet you.
Oh.
Senator Walker, Senator Walker,
why do you want to be president?
Very exciting.
Senator, one question
for "The Sentinel."
Why do you want to be
Every other candidate has answered.
Senator! Senator!
Do you have time for some
questions for lasvegaist.com?
- Yeah, sure.
- Huh.
Well, she's not ignoring that guy.
Welcome to Las Vegas.
Uh, so how do you plan to help
small businesses?
Are you fucking serious?
You know, if you want
to put in a formal request,
- we can find some time
- I don't need your help.
Loading. On background.
The next OTR will be
at a YMCA in Henderson,
where the Senator will be
speaking to real Nevadans
about real solutions.
All right.
Mr. Mayor?
Hi, yes. Where should I meet you?
Yeah, got it.
Okay, I'll be there. Thank you.
- Hey, what are you doing?
- I'm out of here.
You saw that shit she's
deliberately fucking with me.
Enjoy that lasvegaist.com
bounce, because "The Sentinel"
is late to profile a candidate
who actually talks to me.
Okay, wait, Sadie, we can leave?
- Can I leave?
- No, you can't leave.
You have to stay, in
case something happens.
But nothing's going to happen.
Okay, bye.
Yo, Bruce, Walker's still
ignoring me and being boring,
so I'm catching an Uber
to work on a Styles story.
I'm calling it "Portrait of a Candidate
Who Doesn't Stand a Chance."
Yeah, I think so, too.
Greta says they're loving
your takedowns of Grandpa.
- Keep them coming.
- I mean, it's not personal.
His foreign policy is why
no one respects us anymore
- and his domestic agenda
- Uh-huh. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.
Cal Swanson want you on
primetime tomorrow night.
- What? Are you serious?
- Primary night! Yeah.
Okay. Yes, got it.
- Thank you.
- BOTH: Oh, my God!
This is this is huge!
Okay, but we got to prep big-time
because Greta says Cal's
not afraid to eat his own,
so I'm going to grab my stuff
I'll meet you in 20?
No, 15. We have a lot of work to do.
- Cal fucking Swanson?
- Cal fucking Swanson!
- You have officially arrived!
- [LAUGHS] Oh, my God.
Okay. Okay. [BREATHES DEEPLY]
[DOOR BEEPS]
Hey, baby.
Hey Eric, hi!
What what are you doing
what are you doing here?
- [DOOR CLOSES]
- I wanted to surprise you.
Mission accomplished.
Hi.
Mmm, mmm.
Mm, hold up. Just a second.
Just a second.
Hey, um, Gary?
Yeah, can we, um
can we make that an hour?
Okay, bye.
- An hour?
- Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm.
♪
- Look at this.
- Oh, my God.
[BOTH CHUCKLE] I remember that dress.
Yeah, the Easter Egg Roll.
Your dad was the White House
correspondent at "The Post"
- biggest pain in my ass.
- Mine too.
[CHUCKLES] John, figure out
how to send this to her.
Will do.
And how is, uh how is Charlie?
And your daughter Annie, right?
Charlie's been away for months.
- Finally finishing his book
- [CHUCKLES]
And Annie is a freshman at Northwestern.
- Wow.
- Mm-hmm.
- I remember when she was born.
- I had to leave the G6 early.
[BOTH CHUCKLE]
All right, Mr. Secretary,
uh, here we go.
Look, in today's economy,
we should be making it easier,
not harder, for folks to join a union.
And for those hardworking Americans
who can't join unions
Since Walker was icing me out,
I decided to focus on another candidate.
Hot white guy may not have
stood a chance at winning,
and listening to him drone on
about unions
wasn't particularly exciting,
but, hey, at least
I was enjoying the view.
Doubled!
If you're horny, let's do it?
Ride it, my pony. My saddle is waiting.
[GINUWINE'S "PONY"] [PEOPLE CHEERING]
Yeah, yeah ♪
Yeah, yeah, yeah ♪
I'm just a bachelor ♪
I'm looking for a partner ♪
If you're horny, let's do it ♪
Ride it, my pony ♪
My saddle's waiting ♪
Come and jump on it ♪
[PHONE VIBRATES]
As I've traveled around your state,
I've met tons of hardworking
people who are working more
and more hours and bringing home
smaller and smaller paychecks
Please tell me Special Projects
has made progress on my burner.
Not yet, but we did get an
anonymous call on the tip line.
- It's about Walker.
- Tip line?
Are you kidding me?
Do you not remember last cycle?
They claimed she was running
a cannibal operation
- out of a steakhouse.
- Yeah.
Well, Prime Rib Gate
was not our finest moment.
Just listen.
[DEEP VOICE] This message
is for Sadie McCarthy.
I've been reading your articles.
Walker is not who you think she is.
I have credible evidence
of widespread wrongdoing
that will engulf her campaign.
That's it? How do we know
that this person isn't just
another crackpot?
We don't. That's your job.
He left a number, so write this down.
202-555-0198.
Okay, got it. Bye.
Paper of Record. Hey, there.
Hi!
- Did you catch any of that?
- Yeah, totally.
- Labor unions, so important.
- So important, exactly.
Well, look, I'm glad I finally
got you to a campaign event.
- Should we walk and talk?
- Let's.
- Yeah, let's do it.
- Great.
[SIGHS AND GROANS HAPPILY]
- That was necessary.
- [GIGGLES]
- Hey, I missed you.
- Mm, I missed you, too.
[PHONE VIBRATES]
- I am so happy you came.
- [CHUCKLES]
And I have so much work to do.
Mm-hmm
No, but, really, I have a lot of work.
Oh.
Yeah.
Oh.
I'm I'm sorry.
It's just, on the phone, you
said you had time
- to, you know, look over venues.
- No, no, yeah, I know.
- I said that, but
- Okay.
So maybe, like, united front, you know?
Look over some venues and menus.
Team up to get my mother off our backs.
[CHUCKLES]
What if what if we
just got married right now?
There's a chapel downstairs
I'm serious.
- [LAUGHS]
- It could be really romantic.
What do you say?
Will you be the Elvis to my Priscilla?
So let me get this straight.
We rented out Lucien
for your half-birthday,
and now you want to get married
at a drive-through wedding window?
No.
Obviously if you don't want to
do it, we don't have to do it.
Do you not want to get married?
I didn't Of course I want
to get married.
I didn't say I didn't
want to get married.
I've waited eight years to marry you.
Yeah, so
which is why
I wanted it to be, you know
Yeah.
No, you're you're right.
It was a crazy idea.
I'll make time today.
- So we're doing this?
- Yes.
We're doing this.
[SOFT MUSIC]
♪
Well, we have to do our part to ensure
that we have the capabilities
and the skills to be competitive.
I'm sorry, but I have
to ask what do you say
to allegations that
you don't have the stamina
to be commander in chief?
We almost done here?
We have a meeting
with the SEIU at 3:00, so
- Oh, yeah.
- Of course.
It was, uh, lovely seeing you.
[CHUCKLES]
And please do send me that picture.
- Give my best to your family.
- And yours.
Are we on time? Okay, let's go.
[DOOR OPENS, CLOSES]
What the fuck was that?
Why were his hands so shaky?
That was off the record.
- I'm writing it.
- Writing what?
So the man gets tired.
He works 20 hour days talking nonstop
Sell it to someone else.
I'm not buying it, John.
Well, what will it take
for you to get off this?
You have 12 hours
to get me his medical records,
or I run with it.
And I don't just want
a friend in the White House,
I want a fucking soul mate.
You will give me the Veep
scoop and every other scoop.
If he fires the White House florist,
I better be the first to know.
[DRAMATIC MUSIC]
If real Nevadans work hard
and play by the rules,
you should be able to get ahead
and stay ahead.
I understand that real Nevadans
have real problems.
My only real problem
is uppity, bra-burning bitches like her.
[LAUGHTER, INDISTINCT CHATTER]
As president, I will ensure
equal pay for equal work.
No woman who works
full-time should have
A woman's place is in the kitchen.
[ANGRY CHATTER]
Sir, do you have a question for me?
More of a comment.
Feminists destroyed this country,
destroyed the family
milking me for child-support checks
when they should be making me dinner
at the end of a long day.
- What the fuck?
- Right.
It's bra-burning feminists like me
who are responsible for
the demise of this country.
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
[ANGRY CHATTER]
Or it's men like you,
who think you're special
because you were born with a dick.
I'm a motherfucking
woman, baby, all right ♪
I don't need a man ♪
- Okay.
- Where are you going?
I'm a motherfucking woman ♪
I'm in the kitchen where I belong.
[LAUGHING]
And I'm just getting started.
Do what I want, say what you say ♪
I work real hard every day ♪
I run this shit, baby,
I run this shit ♪
[CROWD GASPS]
Don't touch my weave,
don't call me honey ♪
I run this shit, baby,
I run this shit ♪
Ooh ♪
I'm a motherfucking
woman, baby, all right ♪
[ALARM RINGING]
I don't need a man
to be holding me too tight ♪
Mm, yeah ♪
So, uh so you really think
that people will vote for a mayor
who's never held higher elected office?
You have virtually
zero name recognition.
- That's what you're for.
- Touché.
[CHUCKLES] [PHONE CHIMES]
- Excuse me.
- Mm-hmm.
[CLEARS THROAT]
I'm in the kitchen where I belong.
What?
- Is everything okay?
- Um, yeah.
I can't believe she
finally did something cool
and I fucking missed it.
It wasn't as cool as it looked, right?
Yo, Twitter is so fucked up.
Chris Cillizza is calling it
a deep fake,
and Chuck Todd just tweeted
that it was a craven campaign stunt.
Why are all these guys
saying that it was staged?
They always they always
do that shit to her.
Nothing nothing can be spontaneous.
Everything is cold, hard calculation.
Was it staged?
Did she plant that guy?
Were there nipples?
- Oh, there were nipples.
- Oh, goddamn.
They were low-key perfect,
and it was fucking amazing.
It happened really fast,
but I was there, dude.
The vibe was really real.
Then then you have to prove it.
It's all you can do.
- Why would anyone trust me?
- They don't trust any of us.
That's called being the media.
But but as journalists,
we have to tell the readers
what actually happened,
even when they don't want to believe it,
even when we don't want to believe it.
So how do I prove it?
Interview Walker.
I-I wish I could, but I'm not on
pool duty tomorrow, and she
she hates me.
Get her to tell you on
the record that it was legit.
Right. Okay.
Yeah, I can do that.
- Yeah.
- I think.
Are you sure you want that whole bar?
I thought you were body positive.
- It's dark chocolate, low fat.
- Body neutral, and buckle up.
There's five milligrams in each square.
[QUIRKY MUSIC]
♪
Shit.
Annie Annie Annie, sweetie, I-I
you were talking too fast,
and I can't understand
what the hell you're saying.
- Are you hurt?
- No. I
- Have you been attacked?
- I haven't been attacked.
Okay, so so then what is the issue?
[PHONE BEEPS]
That is what I'm trying
to tell you. Can we
Shit, sweetie. I got to call you back.
John, what have you got for me?
- [LINE BEEPING]
- Fuck!
Hey, it's me. Uh, wanting to
let you know
I've called this stupid number
from the tip line,
like, 10 times, and it rings to nowhere.
It's a bullshit tip. Call me.
[ELEVATOR BELL DINGS]
Oh, you got to be fucking kidding me.
Where were you today?
I, uh I had another story to work on.
Look, am am I missing something?
Is this because of what happened?
Did you bail on pool duty
because you're mad at me?
Jesus Christ,
not everything is about you.
You think I wanted to miss that?
You could have called me
and told me to get there.
You could have you could
have told me a lot of things,
but you didn't.
What the hell is that supposed to mean?
Doesn't mean a damn thing,
just like what
happened between you and me.
Okay. There it is. [DOOR BEEPS]
Look, I thought it was a one-time thing.
[DOOR BEEPS] Sadie, will you just
If I had known you were
her press secretary,
I never would have
I could lose my job
if anyone ever found out,
and you knew that.
I was unemployed
when I came to your room.
- I swear.
- Uh-huh.
I had an interview
earlier that afternoon.
I-I bombed it. I never thought
I'd get the job.
[DOOR BEEPS]
I would blow a bellman for
a real key right now.
Even the appearance
of a female journalist
sleeping with a source,
I'd be destroyed,
never mind that men have been
fucking whoever they wanted
since the dawn of journalism
and fucking.
[DOOR BEEPS]
Oh, God.
[DOOR BEEPS] Hallelujah.
[SIGHS]
[GROANS]
[CLEARS THROAT]
[MYSTERIOUS ELECTRONIC MUSIC]
♪
[PHONE RINGING]
♪
What the
♪
Fuck.
Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck.
Fuck!
Aah!
Bruce, Bruce, the
number the tipster left
is the burner phone,
which means the tip is real.
It's like "inside the house" real.
This guy knows where I am,
which means he might work for Walker
or at least have her official schedule,
which also means
he might know other things.
Um, I'm freaking out.
Uh, what do we do?
Call me.
♪
What do I do?
In a den of thieves, the only final sin
is stupidity.
[EVIL LAUGHTER]
[GROANS]
This is so scary.
♪
Shit. Sadie, where are you at?
I need to get to Walker,
but her schedules aren't in English.
FPPO what does that mean?
For peaceful people only?
Call me.
For planning purposes only.
- Hi.
- Hi.
What are we planning?
Uh, that's what FPPO stands
for in campaign schedules.
- I couldn't help but overhear.
- Oh, right.
No. I know that. I'm a journalist.
Lola, right?
I follow you on TikTok. Uh, I'm Josie.
I'm an organizer.
For my candidate crush, right?
I thought you looked familiar.
I was at that house party y'all
threw last week in Portsmouth.
Yeah, I told the team to invite you.
[CHUCKLES]
Uh, so what are you working on?
Okay, so I need a follow-up
with Felicity Walker,
but I have no idea
what any of this means.
And if I ask her campaign, I'm
going to sound like an idiot.
And if I ask the press corps,
they'll just
they hate me.
Why would you think they hate you?
Public radio told me to kill myself.
- So mostly that.
- Yeah, that's clear.
[BOTH LAUGH] Um
- okay, well, can I take a look?
- Yeah, please.
Okay. First of all, it's called a sked.
- Nobody calls it a schedule.
- Okay, sked got it.
Mm-hmm. Uh, OTR, that's
an off-the-record stop.
But it's not actually off the record,
it's just off the official
sked, also known as an OTC
opportunity to crash.
Okay, hold up. Hold up.
Okay. MOU is a memorandum
of understanding
that you'll pay your own way.
F&F is when the press gets
time to file and feed.
RON is short for room overnight,
as in, where are you sleeping tonight?
Oh.
So, where are we RON'ing tonight?
[UPBEAT FUNK MUSIC]
♪
Primary Day
the day we've been working
toward for months.
The candidates have spoken.
The voters have made their choices.
That means that until results
start to come in,
campaign reporters have something
we almost never have
free time.
♪
- [PHONE VIBRATES]
- [INHALES SHARPLY]
Sorry, uh, I have to take this.
I am about to hit send.
- I need to see you.
- Where?
Ninth-floor elevators.
You won't regret it.
- I'll be there.
- It's good, Grace.
Yeah, it better be fucking good.
[INDISTINCT CHATTER]
- There you are.
- Hey.
So I booked us a couple's
massage at 2:00 p.m.
How's that sound? Does that work?
Um, no, actually.
Did you not see what
Walker did yesterday?
Yeah, your lady lost her shit. So what?
I am Liberty Direct's
Walker beat reporter,
and the Republican leadership
is already calling
for an investigation into #BraGhazi
and whether she violated
any fire-safety laws.
I have two primetime primary-night hits
and Cal Swanson, aka the
highest rated talk show on TV.
All good. All good.
I just thought some self-care
would be nice, right?
Obviously work is
stressing you out, so
[SCOFFS] Work is not stressing me out.
- You are stressing me out.
- Me?
You and your mom and her party planners
and demands and 75 emails
about peonies and canapés
and crap nobody will remember
that's stressing me out.
So, if you will excuse me,
I have work to do.
[ELEVATOR BELL DINGS]
- Hey.
- Hey.
These are the medical records?
Better.
All right, I'm filing.
Why tell you that he's got
the stamina of a 25-year-old
when I can show you?
Mr. Secretary?
He's running the Vegas 5K.
[SCOFFS]
Grace.
Good luck.
- See you at the finish line.
- Yes.
[QUIRKY MUSIC]
[ELEVATOR BELL DINGS]
Dale, hey.
Oh, I won't die if I live in Georgetown,
but I hear the food
on Air Force One is terrible.
Please. Pretty please.
She is not taking questions
from reporters right now.
That's gas, 'cause
I'm not a real reporter.
I want quote approval, and you
have to embargo until polls close.
100% no problem,
except I can't guarantee quote approval.
And, also, uh, w-what does embargo mean?
What do you mean by that?
Ten minutes after our last OTR.
- Got it.
- Wait.
But I got one more condition for you.
For the love of God, can you get
her to answer Sadie's question?
- Yeah.
- Great.
I don't know how you
convinced me of that.
Now, Kimberlyn, what do you make
of Felicity Walker
stamping out free speech
in the name of sexism?
Well, Cal, I think
what we're witnessing here
is a candidate having
an unprofessional meltdown.
Whoa. Hang on a second. Unprofessional?
She destroyed property.
- Jesus, can you let me talk?
- Cal isn't going to.
Your answers need to be sharper.
What have you been doing all day?
Next question.
You know, the media mocked me
for skipping New Hampshire,
but I wanted to be here
talking with you.
In my opinion, Vegas is the
most honest city in America.
[PHONE RINGING]
Half meritocracy, half crapshoot
that is what our economy has become
to so many hardworking people.
Politicians in Washington,
they want to blame you
for their failures, but
the people of Nevada,
you guys know better you know
- Hello?
- Hey, it's me.
Oh, my God. Can you please
not call me on this thing?
It's it's freaking me out.
They could be listening, you know?
You called me 15 times
in the middle of the night.
I think I deserve to see for myself.
So what do we do?
How do I reach the source if
if his number is the burner?
We wait.
The data team has a source in the NSA,
and they're running the number.
So, if we get anything,
I'll let you know.
And if the tipster calls back,
we'll be ready to trace the number.
In the meantime, you have a primary
and #BraGhazi to cover.
So what's the fallout
from the Walker campaign?
I'm, uh I'm r-reporting that out.
Tie your Walker reporting
to your state-of-the-race?
You know, Dale
Dale's with the old man.
If he wins tonight, his party's going
- to be forced to fall in line.
- [SCOFFS]
And he will be the inevitable nominee.
And Dale will be the inevitable
White House correspondent.
Great. Thank you.
[APPLAUSE]
Hey, hey.
♪
Sources say
the former Secretary of State
and Democratic stalwart is
recovering with his family
after briefly losing consciousness
at the Vegas
Blazin' Rock N' Roll 5K Run.
The incident comes as exit polls give
the three-time presidential
candidate a resounding lead
over his celebrity opponent.
Senator Felicity Walker
is in third place,
bolstered by a late surge
of support from women
what pollsters are calling "Bra Bump."
Dale, when are you filing?
His campaign said he's just dehydrated.
It happens. He's still going
to be the nominee.
I am covering the White House.
Another thing you missed.
Yes, I am writing it for the front.
Oh, um, hey, how's
that Styles story coming?
[LAUGHS] How's the food
on Spirit Airlines, Dale?
[LAUGHS MOCKINGLY]
No, I'm not laughing at you.
♪
I-I have to rewrite
my state-of-the-race.
- I can't help you right now.
- I don't need help.
I got an interview with Walker.
Thank you. Thanks so much.
I really needed to feel worse
about my life choices right now.
Here, I got her to answer
your trick question.
Unlike that Ted Kennedy dude,
she actually had a pretty good answer.
What is this?
You got it? How?
I'm texting you the audio.
I can't I can't accept this.
Nope, never, never share a scoop.
- Have I taught you nothing?
- Chill.
It's not my scoop.
Her preppy press secretary
made me ask your question
as a precondition.
I think he wants to bang you
or something.
See ya.
Cal, I'm coming to you live
from Las Vegas,
where the Democratic
frontrunner has just proven
to the world he is too old and frail
to be the next president.
Cal, I think we can both agree,
no matter how the vote turns
out here, he is simply unfit.
[SIREN WAILING]
[INDISTINCT CHATTER]
Hello.
- No.
- John.
Excuse me.
Hey. How how'd you know we were here?
I know a lot of things. How is he?
Uh, we'll release a statement soon.
Come on, I'm not here as a journalist.
I'm here as a friend.
[SIGHS] It was a massive blockage
to his coronary artery.
They did everything they could.
He's going to be okay, right?
Does he have to drop out?
Because the exit polls
look really good for him.
- Grace
- That Hollywood cheeseball
is in second, but a win here
gives him the delegates
Grace
he's gone.
I'm sorry.
He's gone. Um, wait here.
I'll I'll let you know
when you can run it, okay?
[KATE BOLLINGER'S
"LADY IN THE DARKEST HOUR"]
[EXHALES SHARPLY]
♪
[SIGHS, BREATHES SHAKILY]
♪
Walt, um, I've got some breaking news.
Can't say just yet.
Alert the desk?
Yes.
It will impact the primary.
It, it is ♪
It's all right ♪
♪
[PHONE CHIMES]
It, it ♪
Holy shit.
It all gets better with time ♪
♪
You okay?
I spent weeks tearing that man down.
I made fun of him for being old.
Twitter is calling me
Kimberlyn Kevorkian.
You need to block those trolls.
You were just doing your job.
And you are great at it.
I know it's important to you.
Lady in the darkest hour ♪
Which got me thinking
You know, if this, uh
wedding stuff
is stressing you out so much
♪
Maybe we should elope.
No.
I don't want that.
I want to honor what we have,
and I want our friends
and family to see me marry you,
preferably in Vera Wang. [BOTH LAUGH]
♪
Things couldn't stay, but change ♪
Wait, wait, wait.
Is that grapefruit essential oils?
Hmm. You know it is.
♪
Then the outside peels away ♪
[CHUCKLES]
Revealing it was right ♪
♪
Do you trust that time
will be your friend? ♪
This is Annie.
Leave a message or, better yet, text me.
[LINE BEEPS]
Hi, sweetie. It's your mom.
I'm sorry I couldn't talk yesterday.
I don't know if you saw the
news, but it's been a day.
[CHUCKLES]
Anyway, I can talk now,
so call me back, yeah?
♪
Lady in the darkest hour ♪
[ELEVATOR BELL DINGS]
Smile all sweet like it isn't sour ♪
[ELEVATOR DOORS CLOSE]
♪
- So when can I see you again?
- I'll be around.
I won't quit until our girl does.
♪
Lady in the darkest hour ♪
♪
You know what they say
what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas.
It didn't happen in Vegas.
It happened in Iowa.
Sadie, I'm trying to apologize.
Huh.
You could have made it worse, you know?
Asking Lola to ask my question
I would have gotten it
out of Walker somehow.
Yeah, I-I know you
could have, eventually,
but, honestly, it was too painful
to watch you keep trying.
- [SCOFFS]
- It was. [CHUCKLES]
Hey, I'm sorry.
I-I never meant to put you
in that position.
So is this us being
strictly professional,
never speaking of what happened?
What happened? I have no
I have no idea
what you're talking about.
You're such a gifted liar.
If only there was a way
to make a career out of it.
You must leave now,
take what you need ♪
Strictly professional.
Hmm?
Only because you took my advice
and got rid of that nonsensical slogan.
Ah, you're never wrong.
- Wow, you finally got it.
- Learned it.
- [LAUGHS]
- A new headline there.
♪
The carpet. too, is folding over you ♪
♪
And it's all over now, baby blue ♪
All right.
Uh
- This way, yeah.
- This is probably
I should probably do the same thing.
My fault.
♪
[PHONE RINGING]
Yeah, yeah, yeah ♪
It's all over,
it's all over now, baby blue ♪
♪
Sadie McCarthy.
It looks like Walker
is a real contender now.
I'd say it's time you and me
had a little talk.
Greg, move your head.
Bye.