The Kardashians (2022) s01e03 Episode Script

1
KIM: Previously on The Kardashians
So Ray J's manager
is claiming he has a sex tape
of us in Santa Barbara.
It's like over my dead body
is this (BLEEP) gonna
happen to me again.
It's okay.
It's not okay, though, it's not.
Travis and I want to have a baby.
We want it so badly
because we want to make
something together.
We are doing our first days
of our promo photo shoots
at Saturday Night Live.
I don't think people really get
how insane SNL is.
So it's literally almost a 24-hour day.
Hi, I'm Kim Kardashian West,
and I'm hosting SNL this week
with musical guest Halsey.
(BARKER SPEAKING)
Don't even do this to me.
My heart is racing.
Oh, my God! I'm gonna cry.
Oh, my God!
KIM: Oh, shit.
This is happening.
(UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING)
When I had lunch with Lorne Michaels
that day at the Beverly Hills Hotel,
he said, it would be fun
to have you in a skit,
on the show.
KHLOÉ: I just knew
if I agreed to come to New York
somehow I would be roped into this.
I mean, SNL, it's like an iconic place
in history to be.
- A big deal.
- It's a huge deal.
Today is (BLEEP) nuts.
I just get in the car in New York.
I find out that Trav is gonna propose
to Kourt, and we get to surprise them.
We are on our way to SNL.
Somehow we're thrown into the live show.
I mean, this is craziness.
- Nice to meet you.
- So, I'll be right out of frame.
- And you reach out for this.
- Okay. Okay.
MAN: All right, we're gonna
rehearse it out here, please.
WOMAN: There's some new stuff going on.
KHLOÉ: Kim!
- Kim! Can she see me?
- MAN: No.
- She can't?
- Probably not.
- The lights are on.
- KHLOÉ: Oh. Oh.
I was like she was staring right at me.
Like, is this a joke?
KRIS: She's working.
(KIM SPEAKING)
KHLOÉ: Andrew, can I see my script?
- Just three whole lines.
- I have three lines. Thank goodness.
- She can memorize. That's good.
- You can go over the important lines.
Somehow I'm doing the live show
tomorrow, which I have no idea
how all of this transpired,
but we're going to make it work.
I would do anything for Kimberly.
So here we are.
I'll be Kris Kardashian,
whoever that is.
"Kim, you're being so funny today."
"And I love these drinks you made.
"What are they called again?"
"Malt shake."
And then there's one more here.
"God. I knew I was off."
"Oh, thank God, I'm back to being Kim."
"But I knew something was off."
- My God, and the Daytime Emmy goes to
- And the Emmy goes to
WOMAN: Khloé Kardashian.
- So, Kim?
- KIM: Yeah?
Um
- Travis came to see me.
- Yeah?
And I heard through a little birdie
that you've been helping him
with something for Kourtney.
I have.
I can't believe you kept this secret.
He came over and he asked for
her hand in marriage,
and I was like, literally,
I want to cry now,
except Mario just did my makeup.
KIM: Well, don't cry.
KRIS: It was so sweet and so tender.
And then he said
Don't cry, your makeup
Mom, you're getting Mario
- Don't start crying.
- I know. That part
- that he asked her, it's so respectful.
- I know. And then he said,
he went to your dad's grave
and asked your dad.
- KIM: I know.
- And I just lost it.
Okay, guys, I have to work,
like, can you do
Why are you doing this to me?
- Like, I really have to work.
- KRIS: Sorry.
- I can't ruin my makeup.
- KRIS: It's all happy. It's happy.
I know. It's not sad.
I wish your dad was here
to see it though.
I can hardly believe that it's the
first time that she's getting married.
Isn't that cute?
That's really crazy.
- Yeah.
- That she hasn't been married before.
(LAUGHS)
- Well, I've had enough, for all of us.
- For the whole family.
(UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING)
MAN: Khloé!
WOMAN: You look gorgeous.
Kelly, will you pass that squid down?
KHLOÉ: So good.
Look at this fish.
MAN: My God. Wow!
KHLOÉ: Wow.
That is gorgeous.
- It's good
- Oh!
KHLOÉ: Oh, my God.
We are so excited to be
in New York City tonight
at one of our favorite restaurants
with our best friends in the world.
And these are our ride or dies.
People that have been
with us for decades
and we're all here to support Kim.
Guess what I want to do in the morning
before we go to SNL?
Tell us.
- When I was a stewardess
- Oh, my gosh.
I used to live in an apartment
across the street from Carnegie Hall.
JONATHAN: You used to live in New York?
- And never told us that in 15 years?
- I know!
Out of every story you've told us,
you never mentioned once.
I showed you the house
where I shaved my legs
- for the first time in San Diego.
- My God. I can't anymore.
- Remember I talked about that.
- No, I know that.
- I know all the stories, not this one.
- Okay. All right.
Well, I rented an apartment with Wait
With three other girls
who were stewardesses.
And we did not have a closet,
and we had rented single beds
like the seven dwarfs.
They were all lined up in a row.
Don't want to see
where your mother used to live?
- No, my problem with my mom is
- MAN: Yeah.
My mom has the most
beautiful present life.
But sometimes my mom misses out
because she's crying about something
- that happened back in like the '80s.
- Yeah.
And I Like that makes me sad
because then in 10 years,
she's going to say,
"Remember at Milos, at dinner."
I remember Milos! SNL.
Look, feta cheese!
- Right there.
- Remember feta cheese!
Sometimes I wanna shake her and say,
- "Yes, the memories are amazing"
- Live in the moment.
"but let's appreciate right now."
Scott, you look so nice.
- So nice.
- Yeah, you really do.
How was SNL today?
Good. It was long.
Aren't you doing it?
- Uh-uh.
- No? Why?
I talked to Kourtney about it,
and she wasn't feeling it.
I don't know what the premise is.
It's I don't wanna
Basically, like, I say to her,
"Do you know the reason
I date young girls
"is because I'm trying
to add them all up
"so they're your age."
Oh, come on.
If me and Kourtney were married,
sure, I'd make fun of her on TV.
But not like separated,
like it's just not in good taste.
You have to follow your gut
and if that's
That was my gut, and I called her,
I talked to her about it.
And when I came to the conclusion,
I was like
Then don't.
Initially I just wanted to come
and support Kim and watch.
- That was it.
- Kim is so happy you're here.
So I'm good with that.
I just want to give
a little toasty toast.
ALL: Oh!
Everyone. Kris Jenner. Mom?
- Yes. I'm here.
- There she is.
I just want to say,
Kimberly, I'm so proud of you,
and for this whole SNL experience.
And honestly, we're in New York.
We're here for Kim.
We're honoring Kim right now,
and I'm just so happy
that we're all here together.
We are lifelong friends and family.
Go, Kimberly!
Go, New York!
- We're back.
- Yeah, Khlo!
(ALL CHEERING)
- You've learned to give good speeches.
- Okay.
Yes.
Mrs. Hannigan, are you okay?
I just forgot why I needed my phone.
Look at her with her pearls.
Little girls.
- Little girls.
- Little girls.
(SINGING)
Every single day when the sun comes up
No exceptions gotta show love
It feels like I'm dreaming
This is paradise
I don't know how these SNL people
stay up every night until 3:00 a.m.
Do you know that I got into bed,
fell asleep, and at 3:58,
Kim text me and said,
"I just finished at SNL."
Talk about a grueling schedule.
I thought our schedule was a lot.
We still have a few hours to kill
before we get to SNL,
and I have the perfect idea
of what to do in the meantime.
Okay, so here's the deal.
When I was a flight attendant
- Wait. Hold on, hold on.
- Okay.
(CLEARS THROAT)
Trying to muster up the
I give a (BLEEP) energy,
so hold on a second.
Give a (BLEEP) energy.
All right.
Tell me when you care about me.
I just can't find
any of the (BLEEP) cares.
- Cares? Story?
- For your (BLEEP) stewardess apartment.
I think you keep forgetting
that you've told me this story.
KHLOÉ: My mom, God bless her.
I love her. But I can go to any state,
and she takes me on these tours
of her childhood.
When I go to San Diego,
I've gone to her high school.
I saw where she started her period,
like the things she'll tell me.
So I know all the (BLEEP) stories.
- (PHONE RINGING)
- Oh, God, who's this?
Hello, Shelli-smelly.
WOMAN 1: "Kim Kardashian West
is requesting you to
"come into her room ASAP. You and Khlo."
Okay, coming.
Can we bring cameras?
Hold on. Let me ask.
Can they bring cameras or no?
WOMAN 2: Yeah. Bring the cameras.
- WOMAN 1: Yes, bring the cameras.
- Okay, bye.
Let's go.
When she calls and asked me
to come to her room,
which is right down the hall,
instead of running to my room
like she would normally do, I can tell
something is about to go down.
You look nice.
Haven't seen you in forever.
Yeah. Thank you very much.
- I just came from the airport.
- Oh.
This is my traveling coach vibes.
I like your traveling coach vibe.
Wait, did you just get here?
I thought you were already here
In New York.
Well, I had to go to LA and come back,
so I just traveled
to get something for Kim.
You went all the way to LA
- to get something for Kim?
- Mmm-hmm.
You're something else.
What did you get?
Well, that's what she wants to show you.
Kim?
- Hey, guys.
- Hi.
- Hey, girl.
- I wanted to show you guys
Yeah, he's standing
- Yeah, I was just gonna cry, so yeah.
- Don't cry.
But I can cry 'cause I don't have
any make-up on.
So Kanye flew home last night.
And he came back this morning and I want
to show you guys when he got me.
Gorgeous. Something gorgeous.
KRIS: Oh, my God.
I want to show you guys what he got me.
KRIS: Oh, my God.
And he flew home and he got
the computer, it was on a hard drive.
And met up with Ray J at the airport
and got it all back for me.
- Oh, Kim.
- Oh, my God.
That's amazing.
KIM: I know Kanye did this for me,
but he also did this for my kids.
I want to shield them from as much
as I can. And if I had the power to,
or if Kanye has the power to, like, that
is just the most important thing to me.
And I'm just, like,
so emotional because of it.
And I just It just means a lot to me.
I think I need a security guard
to stand by this janky bag.
KRIS: Thank you for Kanye,
and for his unbelievable way
he does things
- and the ability to get something done.
- Amen.
And probably a big, fat, huge check,
so we're all very grateful.
Definitely not no check,
they not getting that story ever again.
- No, no way. That was amazing.
- That's such an awesome thing you did.
Well, you also knew how much
it meant to her
and how hard she's been trying
to do that for years and years.
I watched it. It was just footage of us
at a restaurant, at a nightclub.
Nothing sexual, nothing weird.
And so now I can take a deep breath
and not worry about this
right before SNL,
right before the bar,
right before, like everything.
Well, I'm so happy.
Thank you for doing that.
Well, you can negotiate my next deal.
- How about that?
- Yeah.
Can we just really quick say a quick
prayer for you today?
Yes.
- Okay. We're ready?
- Sorry.
Khlo, you're good at prayers.
Dear Heavenly Father,
thank you so much for this day.
Thank you for bringing us together.
May we always be united
and never divided.
May we always try to do the right thing
and leave people a little better
than how we met them.
Lord, please give Kimberly
all the strength,
all the confidence she needs tonight.
Please give us all the love and grace,
and let us be covered
in the blood of Jesus Christ.
And let us please have a sense of humor
and no one take anything personally
that I say. I love you.
(ALL LAUGHING)
ALL: Amen.
Wait. Go, Kimmy.
- Yeah, Kim.
- Yeah, Kim.
And now you can go ahead
and kill it on SNL!
(ALL CHEERING)
Go get it!
Have fun. We'll see you there.
Have fun you guys.
- Bye, love you baby. I'm so happy.
- I love you, Kims.
I love you.
We got the tape!
Annie, we got it.
(CROWD CHEERING)
All right. Are we going to go on this
walk to the apartment?
Okay, Mom, if we do this,
we have 45 minutes.
KRIS: All right, let's go.
Let me grab Corey.
KHLOÉ: So now, we're going to
see the apartment.
I'm going to the outside
of a building
"Oh, bricks. Okay, good.
Okay, we're done."
I don't know. I just don't like
Why are we doing this every time?
And it's always me.
No other sister.
Just me.
KRIS: You know that we never
shot on the streets,
really of New York ever the last time.
And I always wanted there to be like
Sex and the City music playing.
(CAMERA SHUTTER CLICKING)
I'm not really thrilled to have
the apartment tour anyway,
and there are swarms of paparazzi,
and now they're just
following us down the street.
I struggle with anxiety and ugh,
this feeling makes me so grossed out.
- Can you imagine
- This is exactly why,
I didn't wanna join.
I wanna go back to the hotel.
This is not what I'm doing
for three blocks.
- Hey, Khloé! Love you.
- Hey, guys.
- We saw a lotta people and we're like
- I'm going back with them.
- My God. Really?
- I like this stuff.
KHLOÉ: And then when I see
my glam people,
I see Ashley and Andrew.
I'm just going to jet back with them
and go back to the hotel.
So sorry, Mom.
Sorry, Corey. Have fun.
- Babe, will you buy me a pretzel?
- Yeah.
- I think two.
- No, one, one.
- Want to share it?
- Yeah.
We'll get two.
- Thank you.
- I don't want one.
We'll just get
- Just one will be fine.
- Get one. Thank you. No, that's it.
There you go.
I don't want this.
So you know exactly
where you are right now?
I do, right now.
Everybody gets lost in a big city
and I have a north star,
and that would be Bergdorf Goodman.
So when I get lost,
I just look for Bergdorf's.
Here's the difference, though.
When I lived here,
and I would walk to Bergdorf Goodman,
that was just like a dream.
I could never afford to shop, really,
at Bergdorf Goodman.
Yeah.
And look how life changes so much.
I walked the streets
of New York 45 years ago.
I went to flight attendant school
and then they assigned me to New York.
Robert and OJ
met me at the airport,
because they had just
flown in from Montréal,
where they watched Bruce Jenner
win the gold medal.
Because OJ was doing the commentary.
How about that (BLEEP) story.
Isn't that wild?
WOMAN: That needs to be
in the cut, guys.
- (LAUGHS)
- That needs to absolutely be in the cut.
I think, babe, this looks
suddenly very familiar.
Wait. Where's Carnegie Hall?
One more down to the left.
It's this building 'cause
this looks really familiar,
or I think it's up here, babe.
I'm lost.
Of course, I'm lost.
It was 45 years ago,
and New York City has changed.
So what street are we on now? 57th.
Well, no. It
It hasn't changed actually,
not one damn building has changed.
But I think it's up here, babe.
Was this it?
Hi. Sorry.
This looks familiar.
And I was on the third floor.
It's this building. There it is, babe.
This is really an amazing moment
for me to reflect on.
- I love New York.
- I love New York.
And here I am today,
my daughter is going to host
the most iconic show in New York,
and it's been What a ride.
COREY: We haven't been on a walk
in New York in a long time.
KRIS: I know.
Happy Saturday.
Holy shit, it's happening.
But one thing
I'm really proud of is that
no one could ever call me a gold digger.
Honestly, I wasn't even sure
how do you become one,
so I asked my mom's boyfriend, Corey.
I've been very lucky in life
and I know I'm privileged.
Make sure you stop after each one.
Let each one land,
- and when they laugh
- Yeah.
then you come in again.
We have a great show for you tonight.
Halsey is here, so stick around
and we'll be right back.
Great.
The great Sacha Baron Cohen says,
ask for He told me, like,
just say it,
ask for forgiveness after
because everyone will have
an opinion and say "no."
You're making fun of like the caricature
and it's of your life.
The things that people have,
like created of these ideas.
- That's what you're just doing.
- Totally.
KIM: But I still think
I should talk to Corey.
Could you get Corey to come in
and just get it over with?
- Yeah, just get over with.
- Let's do it.
Let me get Corey.
- Hi.
- What's up?
I want everyone to just feel good.
Obviously no one's
going to feel good with,
like the things that I'm going to say.
But I just want you to know that,
like obviously,
if this was true, I wouldn't think
that was funny with my mom.
Do you know what I mean?
Okay. That's the attitude.
- Love you, Corey.
- Love you for that.
- Corey's the best.
- He really is.
- Such a good sport.
- Now you've had that conversation,
it's off your heart,
you can really go for it.
Now I can (BLEEP) go for it.
I only have, like, two minutes.
I wanna try to go the bathroom
one more time.
I keep on having to pee like
a million times before the show starts.
That's just like who I am.
- Do I have to pee again or no?
- No, you don't.
- It's nervous energy.
- Every time I sit, I pee.
It's kind of like you just definitely
feel like you have to pee,
even if I just peed.
And then if I go and sit down
to pee, I pee, like it's weird.
I'm about to go on.
(EXHALES)
(KNOCK ON DOOR)
- All right, break a leg.
- All right, guys.
(ALL CHEERING)
MAN: Kim, over here.
This way, over here, Kim.
MAN: Ladies and gentlemen,
Kim Kardashian West.
(ALL CHEERING)
KIM: It's so great to be here tonight.
I know.
I'm surprised to see me here too.
I was like, you want me to host? Why?
I haven't had a movie premier
in a really long time.
(LAUGHTER)
Actually I only had that
one movie come out and
no one told me it was even premiering.
It must've slipped my mom's mind.
One thing I'm really proud of is that
no one could ever call me a gold digger.
Honestly, I'm not even sure
how you become one.
So I asked my mom's boyfriend, Corey.
(LAUGHTER)
I'm excited to be here tonight
to show you guys that
I'm so much more
than just a pretty face.
(CROWD CHEERING)
And good hair, and great make-up,
amazing boobs and a perfect butt.
Basically, I'm so much more
than that reference photo
my sisters show their plastic surgeons.
Once your monologue's over,
you have to just go change.
It's a rush right into the skits.
It's so chaotic and so much fun,
and I think I thrive
under pressure and chaos.
So, like, it was all fun for me.
KRIS: When she came out with that
pink thing and got on the stage
KHLOÉ: Zsa Zsa Gabor.
- Yeah.
- COREY: She killed it.
For her to prove everyone wrong.
She's so good at this shit.
You're a (BLEEP) legend for birthing
such a queen
such as Kim Kardashian West.
She better (BLEEP) work this
legendary bitch. I love her so much.
I'm honestly so surprised at how much
fun I had because this just isn't me.
Like this kind of stuff
usually makes me nervous.
WOMAN: The cast should be changing
for good night.
But then I just did it.
Thank you to Lorne Michaels
and the entire cast and crew.
And thank you to Kanye and the rest
of my family for being such good sports.
I love you guys so much. Good night.
It was such an amazing experience.
Like, euphoric.
Thank you, everybody.
Good night.
Great job, Kim.
(INDISTINCT CHATTER)
Nailed it!
You were so top notch.
Not one hiccup.
I had so much fun
You weren't nervous at all?
I actually wasn't. It was shocking
because this was just isn't my thing.
- So like acting, things like that.
- I think it is your thing. No.
There's just so many people
like everywhere, and it's this rush.
And I'm just so excited that it's over,
I didn't mess up, and I just had fun.
What are people saying online?
Was it a good monologue?
WOMAN: It was crazy, incredible.
MAN: It was insane.
- Said you're gonna win an Emmy.
- What are you talking about?
I swear. Also, people were saying,
like, damn, I don't wanna like her,
but this shit is (BLEEP) hilarious.
I hand wrote a note to every single
cast member and crew member
during my day with SNL stationery,
and I put it on each of their desks.
So
You're asking me for a picture?
- Can I get one too?
- Yeah.
WOMAN: Oh, my God! She did it.
Let the fun begin.
(UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING)
- Wow.
- Khloé.
Hi, guys.
- You were amazing out there, Kim.
- Oh, thank you.
- You killed it, girl.
- Kimmy.
MAN: How do you think Kim did?
WOMAN: It was amazing.
AMY: She blew my mind.
MAN: Lorne. Success, she was great.
Good.
I was there. I saw it.
Let's hear it for Kim.
Kim you killed it tonight.
You killed it tonight.
Give me a song, DJ. Let's go!
Whoo!
KIM: Hi.
- Hi. Congratulations.
- Thank you.
- You think it went well?
- Did you have fun?
- I thought it was great.
- Okay, good.
It's so good when your doing a live show
because then you're also,
like one little thing you remember,
like, I wanted that
little thing different, that thing.
You want that change, you can't,
you know whatever.
- The whole thing was fantastic.
- Yeah.
The fact that people that I respect
are saying that it was good,
that just makes me so happy.
Because it was so funny.
You may want to do it again.
Well, I hope I'm invited back.
Thank you.
- I was so nervous for her.
- Cute!
KHLOÉ: And she is amazing.
- I'm so happy for her.
- Yeah.
WOMAN: Kim! My God. You were amazing.
(CHRIS SPEAKING)
Did you hear that?
I want to make sure
you got what he said.
- I was funny.
- She was very funny.
Oh, my God, like Chris Rock
made my life.
Like, I'm not funny, so
the fact that he gave me
this crazy compliment,
I think he's like one of the all-time
funniest people on the planet.
So I'm just like, dying inside.
Yeah. Yeah.
- I am honored.
- If you're saying she was legit.
Legit good.
Wow. Guys, thank you.
It is just fun
to just get to look at you.
- It was really so great.
- It really was.
I can't get over it like
it's really special.
I'm shocked at how fun it was.
- Didn't it go fast?
- It went so fast.
- I learned from it, actually.
- Really?
I really don't think
you should say these,
I just like had opinions, you know,
and you had the confidence of, you know,
to be like, you know, like,
this is funny
and it'll be good for me to say it
and it just killed.
- I just got to enjoy it.
- My God.
I'm so thankful for Amy,
giving me the best advice ever.
She's just such
a girl's girl that, like,
wanted to cheer me on
and wanted me to win.
And when you have friends like that
in your corner,
that just want you to win,
it makes it so amazing when you do
a good job and they're proud of you.
Thank you for letting me be
a part of it.
- Oh, my God, I love you.
- My God, I love you.
(UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING)
We haven't even talked about SNL.
- It was good.
- I know, I haven't even seen you.
It was so good.
My mom's flight was at 5:15,
so I was down in the car at 5:15 a.m.,
- so I never slept.
- My God.
KHLOÉ: I just got back from New York
and I'm doing The Ellen Show.
This I did not wake up like this.
I'm getting my glam done.
Turn around.
I wanna look at the back of your legs.
I brought the wrong skims today.
So my skims are too long,
they're much longer than my dress.
- Is that higher? Cause you can see
- I can see it. Yeah.
So I to cut my skims,
and I'm fine cutting them.
I know the owner.
Could somebody cut?
You're literally up my vagina.
- Oh, my God.
- It's crazy.
You know, having scissors so close
to my vagina is not really ideal.
It's not really my type of foreplay.
Okay, you're freaking me out
with the scissors right there.
My God.
Glam is definitely not always glamorous.
You don't want to go to Disneyland
and see Mickey Mouse with his head off.
You want the whole character together.
(KNOCK ON DOOR)
ELLEN: Yo, Khloé.
- Oh, hey!
- Hi, it's Ellen.
- How are you?
- Did you know I was here?
- No. Nice to meet you.
- Yeah. Shooting the show.
I was going to tell you,
this feels a little more nighttime.
This feels a little more
simple, daytime.
I'm into that You know what
You are winning with me
all day, right now.
- Good.
- So what is your role in this weekend?
I'm not doing anything.
- Okay.
- No, I just know that it's happening.
KHLOÉ: I cannot believe that
Travis is proposing
to Kourt in like three days,
and we are all keeping
Travis and Kourtney's proposal
super hush hush.
But my mom did tell Ellen,
and that's okay because we know
she's never going to say anything.
I thought he was doing
something on the beach,
and y'all were gonna surprise
and go into the room
until when she goes back
to the room, you're all in the room.
I think they are having,
like a romantic something.
But I don't think she'll be
proposed to. I don't know.
It's all a blur.
- Yeah.
- The kids love him.
I mean, they all just a little
punk rock blended family.
- It's amazing.
- How's Scott gonna feel about this?
He's going to have a hard time,
but it's going to be like
they can't put their life on hold
to tiptoe around him?
No, no, I don't think so, either.
I think that it is going to be,
especially because she said
she didn't want to
get married again, so
I know. That's the part
that I feel bad about but
I don't know.
- She's got to live her life.
- You snooze, you lose.
Yeah. Exactly.
All right, I'll see you out there.
Bye, bye.
I'll see you soon. Bye.
(AUDIENCE APPLAUDING)
- Oh, she looks so good.
- So good.
Nobody knows
how crazy it is over at SNL.
They're changing things
like seconds before the show.
(LAUGHTER)
They're so cute. So cute.
(UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING)
(SINGING)
I'm hot as hell
I'm a boss
So extra, extra
So, I'm glad that I had two seconds
to talk to you.
So here's the deal.
So I got a call today from Travis,
and he said he wanted my advice,
and I said, "What's up?"
And he said, well,
Kourtney's fertility health
- all of a sudden
- Okay.
he said, I want to talk to you
because now we have all of these eggs,
and the doctor wants Kourtney
to have the egg retrieval on Sunday.
Our entire family is planning
the surprise proposal
for Kourtney in Santa Barbara.
And now we find out
that she might have this egg retrieval
on the exact same day.
I mean, what are the odds.
He goes, "Do you think
she'll be able to come
- "to Montecito on Sunday night?"
- Not Sunday night.
I said, I don't know.
No, I've done Not Sunday night.
She wants to rest and you're not,
you don't feel good,
but Monday you're fine.
So he has to do it on the 17th.
That's the whole point of all of this,
is that it's their anniversary
and this throws a whole wrench
in the whole He's beside himself.
- So check Sunday. It's happening. Right?
- Okay.
Now what is pending is the location.
Why don't we just override it all
and say, "This is getting too choppy.
- "Let's do it in Calabasas."
- Yes.
KHLOÉ: If Kourtney is getting
her egg retrieval
and doesn't feel well enough
to go to Santa Barbara the same day.
I just want to throw out other ideas.
At least there's going to be back up
where the engagement can still happen
on their anniversary.
(LINE RINGING)
- Can you hear me?
- KRIS: Yeah.
Can you talk?
- Yeah.
- Okay. So I'm sitting here with Khloé.
- Hi, Trav.
- Okay. Hi.
And so I was telling her the update
about the egg retrieval.
- Yeah.
- So I think since there's so much up
in the air, I think we just
narrow it down to Calabasas.
I haven't thought about it
happening anywhere but the beach.
I was just on the beach.
I was just thinking, like very cool,
like designs in the sand,
like a heart like a T and a K.
Okay.
I always get her tons of tulips,
like, that's what I usually get.
Um, okay.
I want your vision to come to life.
And I think maybe just
narrow it down to Calabasas.
It's not a bad backup,
is all I'm saying.
- Yeah. Yeah. I will.
- All right, let us know.
Okay.
KHLOÉ: It's Friday right now.
The proposal is Sunday.
My mom and I know
that Travis has his plan.
He knows what he's doing,
but he's a little more spontaneous.
My mom and I operate by a militant,
crazy-ass schedule.
So we need a plan.
What's happening at 8:00, 8:02, 8:03?
Like we need an agenda.
At least let's nail down the location.
Like, I can't.
I'm literally getting hives.
Let us know tomorrow.
- Okay.
- Okay. Ciao.
Okay. Bye.
(EXHALES)
I just have to have faith,
and a beta blocker
that Travis is going to take care of it.
I don't know if the engagement
will happen on Sunday.
(UPBEAT MUSIC PLAYING)
(SINGING)
Let's go
Would you like some food?
- Huh?
- You want something to eat?
What do you know how to cook?
What's your specialty?
I'm never going to tell you that.
I don't like to cook.
You've got to be able to cook something.
I can cook everything,
but I don't want to cook. I'm an eater.
That's why I'm chubby.
Like, if you had to cook,
and we were in the middle of Covid
- You want to know?
- Yeah, what would you cook?
- Peanut butter and jelly.
- Peanut butter and jelly?
That's not That's spreading
stuff around on a piece of bread.
(PHONE RINGING)
Hey, Trav.
Hi, how are you?
Hi, I'm good. I'm good.
I'm sitting here with Corey.
How is New York?
Oh, it's amazing.
It's amazing. I just got
the best news too.
We went
We went to the doctor and we're not
doing egg retrieval until Tuesday,
so Sunday is literally meant to be.
- Oh, my God, that's the best.
- Nice.
- I'm excited for you, man.
- Yeah, absolutely.
Yeah, it will happen,
like on our anniversary,
which is the most amazing news ever.
Oh, my God, are you nervous?
I'm not, but like I know,
like things I want to say to her,
but I have said them
a million times to her.
But saying them at that moment,
is probably going to be
the most nerve-racking thing ever.
I'm going to send you this,
like, little note
that I've made in my iPhone
of what I plan on saying to her.
Oh, my God, you have to.
I'll touch base with you guys
as soon as we land.
Okay. All right, well,
have a safe flight, and
Travel safe, man.
Don't lose the ring.
Never. I'm going to be
protect it at all costs. Trust me.
- Good.
- All right. Love you guys.
- Love you too.
- Bye, man. Peace.
Bye.
(CHUCKLES)
Oh, look what he Look at this.
"A year ago today,
I fell in love with you.
"One night with you was all it took."
Aw.
- Why am I crying?
- 'Cause you love to cry, baby.
"You've been one of my
best friends for years.
"I've admired you
and adored you for so long.
"You're the love of my life.
"Kourtney, I want to spend the rest
"of it with you.
"Will you marry me?"
What part of this has got crying
into it? What's happened?
I don't know.
It's just That's what girls do when
things like this are happening.
I've never seen this much crying, babe.
This is the most tender thing
I have ever read.
And it's bringing me to tears.
I can't help it.
I'm a crier. What can I say?
- You gonna be dehydrated
- Shut up.
from all that damn crying.
I'm going to get you some water.
I have had so much anxiety
over this location, this date,
everything that's happening,
and I'm just so relieved
that everything's organized, settled.
We have a date, we have a plan, we know
where we're going, and we know when.
(LINE RINGING)
- KIM: Hello?
- Hi.
- Hey.
- So I just heard from Travis,
and him and Kourtney
are on their way back from New York,
and they don't have to do
the egg retrieval until Tuesday.
So we're all set for Sunday.
We're golden.
Okay, amazing.
KYLIE: Okay, cool.
KENDALL: Okay, I'll be there.
KHLOÉ: We needed this answer.
So, we're back on, people.
- It's on and poppin'. Roses and love.
- Praise God.
Whoo!
(SINGING)
Give me what I want
I get what I want
Whoa, oh, oh, oh
What you waiting for?
Whoa, oh, oh, oh
I get what I want
KENDALL: Ready, Freddie?
Oh, shit! I forgot it was pink in here.
No, literally. This is insane.
Today is the day Travis
is proposing to Kourtney.
We are so excited.
We're on our way to Santa Barbara
and my family's right behind us.
Do you know where you're going?
I have no idea.
I was just going to In-N-Out.
- I'm thinking maybe.
- What did you just say?
- I'm going to get a Coke.
- Oh.
Or a Dr Pepper.
From here it sounded like mumble.
I'm gonna get cheese fries
and a single cheeseburger.
- Not a double?
- No.
I want a double.
- You're gonna get a double?
- Isn't that a lot?
- Then
- You've got two people to feed.
I know.
You know what, it's a Sunday, Kylie.
- Okay.
- It's a Sunday.
We're going to go crazy.
I need my snacks.
Do you have my snacks anywhere?
- Snacks?
- I always have snacks in the car.
- Do you see snacks?
- I don't think so.
Kylie, we're at the food place.
I know, but I think I'm gonna throw up.
- Seriously?
- I don't know.
- I'm getting a little nauseous.
- Okay. Um
I see a snack. Here.
(EXHALES)
- Hi, how are you?
- Hello.
What can I get you?
Can I get a double-double cheeseburger
with just spread
and grilled onions, please?
Wow. Same thing for me.
Okay, so should we just
sit in the thing and eat?
Of course.
What do you think?
I was going to (BLEEP) drive and eat?
Looks like yours, babe.
Hi, guys.
- Hi. Good.
- How are you? I love that dress.
It's one of my 65 looks.
Okay, so I think we're all set.
But can I tell you
- my biggest fear right now?
- Yeah.
Is that we're all going to run
into them on the freeway.
KYLIE: I'm so excited about today.
- I love, love, so
- I love, love.
I love Travis.
I just loved that they were friends
for so long before
Making it like a thing.
You know what I mean?
- Yeah.
- So I feel like they have
a really solid friendship foundation,
- which is super important.
- I agree.
I just love how, like,
calm and, like, easy going
and like, I don't know, I just feel like
he doesn't seem like a stressor.
Whereas Kourtney can, kind of,
be kind of, you know, stressor.
So I feel like that
balances them out or something.
I just think
they're a really good match.
Yeah, and he wants us to be involved.
- Which I like too.
- Yeah, exactly.
I am happy that Travis is going to be
my new brother-in-law.
I've always really, really liked him,
even when they were just friends
for a few years before.
He was always very kind and
really cool with our family
and all the kids.
- KYLIE: I wonder if Scott knows.
- I know, I
Like, it worries me sometimes because
I just don't know how
stable he is right now.
Do you? Like, I haven't spoken to him
on that sort of a level
in a long time, so I don't know
Where he's at,
and with his like mental health.
Kourtney obviously has to continue to,
you know, live her life and be happy.
Of course.
(PHONE RINGING)
It's Mindy. Hi.
He's 33 minutes out.
Wait, he's going to get there
in 33 minutes?
Yeah.
Okay. Let me call Kendall and Kylie
and see where they are,
and I'll call you back.
(PHONE RINGS)
Hey, are you guys driving?
- Yeah.
- Is Kylie driving her car?
Yeah. Why?
I'm just worried that they're going to
see you guys on the freeway.
Well, where are they?
They are 33 minutes away from the hotel.
- What?
- Oh, so we're close to them.
We're 34, we're 34 minutes away.
Oh, my God.
I don't know if we should
speed up or slow down.
If they're 33 minutes and we're
We're 33 now, too.
My mom would be so pissed
if Kylie and I were the ones
to ruin the surprise.
I'd be upset, too.
Trying to figure this out.
We're a little freaked out.
You guys get off on this same exit
and it's a red light, you're screwed.
You'll be at the same exit.
We should have thought this out
a little bit better
and plan to, like, not be in our cars
and just be a little bit more discreet.
Someone's going to see someone.
Kendall and Kylie are going
to get there the same exact time
as Kourtney and Travis
are going to get there,
and that cannot happen.
We pull up right behind them.
- And they know we're in your car?
- What are you guys doing here?
- Oh, shit!
- Oh, shit!
- Oh, shit!
- ALL: Oh, shit!
KIM: Next time The Kardashians
The minute that sun goes down,
it's show time.
Where is he doing on the beach?
It's perfect. He's super romantic.
(ALL CHEERING)
This makes me so happy.
Cheers, you guys.
WOMAN: Cheers.
ALL: Cheers!
I know Scott knows.
KENDALL: Do you have, like,
sympathy for Scott?
Because it doesn't feel like you do.
How do they feel about everything?
They were upset. They didn't understand
why they weren't there.
Hopefully, they're invited
to the wedding.
- Am I invited to the wedding?
- I don't know.
Wow!
Doing my egg retrieval on Tuesday.
They need a baby.
There's a follicle here,
but it looks old.
Very unlikely to get a mature egg.
All we need is one good egg,
and now it's just in God's hands.
(SINGING)
Watch me shine
Watch me rise
Underneath the lights
It's my time
It's my life
Watch me shine
Watch me shine
Watch me shine
Watch me shine
Watch me shine