The Real Housewives of Salt Lake City (2020) s01e03 Episode Script
Everybody Needs a Switzerland
1
[housewife] Previously on
The Real Housewives of Salt Lake City
I want you to experiment,
but not gonna let you drown.
I'm a single mom
and I'm raising three daughters.
I basically married into Mormon royalty.
But it all came crashing down
when we got divorced five years ago.
My grandmother chose me
to marry her husband.
We were kind of an arranged marriage.
-I'm gonna do a toast.
-Yeah.
-Happy birthday week, ladies.
-Whoo!
[shrieking]
My aunt just got both legs amputated.
So when you said it smells like
hospital in here, that hurt me.
-What do you want me to do?
-Disrespecting family?
Are you [bleep] kidding me?
I'm sorry if I hurt you.
[Jen] Mary M. Cosby, I'm watching you.
In this town, I'm Queen Bee and MVP.
When you take cheap shots,
always expect a hangover.
This rose isn't scared
to handle a little prick.
Jealousy is a disease
to which I say, "Get well soon."
I love God, but I will read you
like a scripture.
Just like my pioneer ancestors,
I'm trying to blaze a new trail.
[gentle, ethereal music playing]
[upbeat music playing]
[Lisa] John, I need a Diet Coke so badly.
Henry, for real, like, for real,
you have to work on the Ten Commandments.
-I am.
-[Lisa] It's not hard. Just give me two.
Thou shall not smoke.
Thou shall not do anything bad.
Okay, but, like, what's bad?
Looking at porn.
Yep. Definitely stay away.
This is just like working out,
using weights.
Basically, it's gonna be burning
and permanently killing fat cells.
This is the most exercise
I've done for five months.
That's wonderful, Brooks.
[laughter]
-[man] Ladies.
-[Whitney] Hello.
Welcome to Marie's Antiques and Oddities.
What are you here for today?
I am checking the space out
to hold an event here.
An event at an antique store.
At an antique store.
What kind of event?
Well, something a little wet.
Not so dry.
So you know during Prohibition,
it is a dry country, right?
Yeah.
-Let's go inside.
-All right.
Welcome.
To the secret door that I knew existed.
I love this place.
-Your party is how many people?
-Expecting about 30.
So what we're talking about
is taking at least this front section here
and this whole area.
Perfect, 'cause I love a good theme.
Our happiness is your happiness.
We love that.
-You got that, Heather?
-Yeah, I got it.
[laughs]
Try to balance.
They're kinda heavy.
-Hey, guys.
-Hey.
-Hi, Brady! What's up, baby?
-Good to see ya.
What's going on?
For all the Beauty Labbers
that are pregnant.
-Aren't they so Beauty Lab?
-They're pretty They're sweet.
They think we're gonna give diapers
and bottles, onesies and jammies.
-We're giving 'em Range Rovers.
-Start 'em young,
Start 'em with the things that matter.
I don't know if it's something
in the water or the Botox at Beauty Lab,
but five of our 20 employees
are all pregnant for the first time,
and they are all having baby boys.
So we wanna celebrate them in a huge way.
[Jen] Have to walk me up so I don't slip.
Okay. Oh, my gosh.
Hurry up. My feet are freezing.
[knock on door]
-What's up, Tweety Bird?!
-Hi!
-Look at you!
-I am Tweety Bird.
[laughs] You're so fabulous.
-Hi.
-Hi!
You have to see our cute Range Rovers.
These are so cute.
Walk me through the whole thing.
We have interactive games.
We're having everyone bring
a baby picture.
-Like me?
-Yeah.
We're gonna have them blind on a wall,
and you have to say,
"That's Reagan. That's Jen Shah."
The important detail is the theme.
The reason it's white,
and you're wearing all white, right?
-Right.
-It's really symbolic,
and I wanna make sure
that these young moms
who are so focused on having
the perfect delivery, the perfect baby,
that it's not about perfection.
It's about love, you know?
A Mormon prophet, Harold B. Lee,
said, "There's no work
that a woman will ever do outside the home
that will be equal
to what she does as a mother
raising her children inside the home."
We are successful Mormons
based on how we raise our children,
how happy we keep our husbands
and how perfect our family is or appears.
Hi, lovey.
Hello! Hi!
Even though in our hearts
we know that that's not important,
that's really the social code that we all
adhere to and we're judged on.
They literally have 16-inch ones
or 4-inch, so I did the 8-inch.
Don't you think that's the perfect size?
Let's see what they look like
when we get the bows on them.
We were looking at baby pics.
Let me show you a few pictures
and see if it's completely Georgia.
This is the one in our house right now.
Oh, my gosh. That's so cute.
None of my babies have eyebrows.
Check this one out.
-Who is that?
-That's Georgia.
She's turning six, and she wanted
a rock star bunny party.
Why do you not have this
blown up and framed?
Because my world shut down
when I got divorced.
When Billy and I separated,
I didn't take pictures.
I stopped everything and so
I don't think Georgia
has seen these pictures.
-What happened? How did things
-I got divorced.
So when you got divorced,
why did you feel that way, though?
Because you or other people
were making you feel like,
"Heather, you're divorced.
That's not good"?
Because me. All I was born to do
was to have a family.
When you get divorced,
that's taken away from you.
I chose him not because
he was the love of my life,
but because
-He was Mormon.
-He was Mormon.
My husband left me
after 11 years of marriage.
He said he didn't wanna be
married to me anymore,
and I really resented him for leaving me
because I felt like my entire life
I had curtailed my natural instincts
in order to achieve this family
and this marriage in the temple
and these children,
and I had given up a lot.
Now he was saying he was giving up on me.
Four generations on both sides,
mom and dad, zero divorce.
I'm the first.
See, that's that label put on you guys.
That doesn't mean anything to us.
-It means everything.
-No, it doesn't.
What do you mean,
it doesn't mean anything?
My heart is Mormon,
so what are you gonna do?
-Because you're a good person.
-How am I Mormon and divorced?
-That doesn't make you a bad person.
-How does it make me Mormon?
So should you stay married,
then, and it's terrible?
100 million percent.
[producer] Have you ever been in love?
[scoffs] I don't know.
I think that, like,
when I was 15, I was in love,
you know, with someone that
didn't even like me back.
[laughs] But otherwise,
I don't think I've ever been
deeply in love, no.
I have three daughters. Am I gonna
put that same pressure on them?
That's why you need to do
the right thing and be an example.
If you stayed with him
and it wasn't right,
they think, "This is what we do."
And you foster generations
and generations of females
thinking, "This is just
what we do." Robot. No.
You're empowering them, taking those steps
that are so hard so that
your daughters don't have to.
-Time for cocktails.
-[whirring]
Oh!
[bleep].
Are you a moron?
-[laughs] Okay, well, I wasn't looking.
-How intoxicated are you?
-Are you kidding?
-I don't want to deal with that.
-Where's Leticia?
-[laughs]
When Seth is gone, I love having
my kids home because
at least I feel like I have
a part of my family with me.
Do you have a mop?
I'm sure we do. I don't know where it is.
Classic.
Chloe's 18 years old.
It's her first year away at school,
and I just feel so fortunate
that she wants to come home
and wants to spend time with me.
There is no one I would rather
be with than my children.
[knock on door] -Ah!
-[dog barking]
-Who's here?
[singsong] Hello!
How are you?
-[gasps]
-Hello.
-Hi, guys.
-Hi!
-[muffled] My sweet little babies.
-How are you?
I love you so much. Chloe!
How are you?
What do you want to drink?
-I want that right there.
-A margarita.
I made them in the blender,
but I didn't put the lid on.
Of course. You can't use
Why do you keep pretending
like you're domestic.
-[barking]
-Teddy! No!
-[laughs] Get off the table.
-Teddy's like, "I ain't listening to you."
The Shah ski chalet it's really big.
It's not fun to be there by yourself.
I love Teddy.
The boys are gone doing their own thing.
There's no one to talk to.
It's comforting to know Meredith and I
have similar situations where our husbands
aren't always here all the time.
I actually don't get as pissed off
at Sharrieff because I'm like, "I'm good."
"I'm going to Meredith's tonight."
Are you excited for the '20s party?
-I'm excited for my outfit.
-What are you wearing?
I'm gonna be a 1920s Hollywood madam.
I don't wanna be
the basic bitch 1920 flapper.
Well, I can't wait to see it.
So here's the thing.
Sharrieff has, like,
some coaches' whatever thing,
so Saturday night we're doing
sleepover slumber party,
facials, high kicks.
[Chloe] What are high kicks?
Like shoes?
No, high kicks. I would do one right now,
but you'd see my vagina.
-Like a literal Oh.
-Yes.
[chanting] Grindr, Grindr, Grindr.
[laughs]
[Chloe] What?
I'm feeling really uncomfortable.
[laughs]
Her vagina is in my face.
[Chloe] What are you doing?
You know your mom
has fantastic high kicks.
[Chloe] Oh, God.
I'm beyond shocked that my mom
is around someone doing that
in front of her children.
Um, Brooks and I have to go to Best Buy.
They're going to Best Buy?
If you guys wanna go, you can go.
Even though you birthed these children
out of your vagina, they're my kids.
[laughs]
-Gross.
-[laughter]
Bye.
[laughter]
[upbeat music playing]
-So you ready?
-You guys ready?
-Yeah.
-Okay.
I want you to show me your best skills.
Like pretend you're gonna get
your driver's license today.
[John] You guys have fun today.
I'm not going.
[Lisa] Oh, my gosh. It stresses me out.
I'm literally gonna be praying.
-Close your eyes.
-That's what you do. I can't.
I'm gonna, like, freak out.
I'm driving. I call the shots.
[Lisa] Time goes by so fast.
You really don't have your kids
for that long.
It's like they're renters for 18 years,
and then they can't wait to bail on you.
Eyes closed. Plug your ears.
Everything will be great.
In business,
I feel like I can handle anything.
Throw things at me.
Things change all the time.
I can fix anything.
I feel like I'm a great problem solver.
Okay, so everybody have
their seatbelts on?
-Literally say a prayer.
-I already did.
[Lisa] Okay, good.
Dear Father, don't let us
hit anybody or anything,
and don't let anyone hit us,
in the name of Jesus Christ.
-Are your mirrors right? Okay.
-Mm-hmm.
I say that in my head
every time I get in the car with him.
[engine starts]
Jack, I need you to go easy on me, okay?
I love taking you.
No, I don't, really. I'm lying.
Driving is, like,
such a big responsibility.
I have a strong pull-out game, though.
Yeah. [sighs]
Remember, confident, not cocky.
Okay, so you just wanna be
super situationally aware.
Just think about all the little kids,
-where they are, who runs out.
-Mm-hmm.
It's a very busy road up here.
See how they just pulled in front of us?
Be careful. Slow up.
You wanna encourage your kids
to be calm and feel comforted,
and build them up when they're
behind the wheel of tons of metal.
-Are you stressed?
-No.
Jack, you need to be calmer
with me and more patient.
For real.
-Stay in your lane.
-I get told that too much.
Yeah. Now nicely park.
-Oh, man. Put this down.
-You did it.
Now get me a 44-ounce Diet Coke,
easy ice with lemon.
[laughs] Thank you so much.
-Hello! You look beautiful.
-Look at you.
-So good to see you.
-Your coat.
-You look gorgeous.
-Soft and cuddly.
Good evening.
Good to have you two in tonight.
Do you know what you'd like to have?
-I want the cod. Yeah.
-The cod. It's fantastic.
Would you want to share two things
or you want your own thing?
I will be eating their cod.
I will eat your cod.
I might have the cod, too.
-It sounds really good.
-Fantastic.
-Thank you.
-Thank you.
-So tell me, how are you?
-Good,
but I'm going through this thing
with Robert,
and I don't understand it.
We've always been inseparable.
But he turned 17 and meets this girl,
-and now it's like he's an adult.
-Doing his own thing.
I have a beautiful son.
His name is Robert.
He's named after his dad.
When I had my son, I went into
a whole 'nother level of love,
and every birthday, we went to Dubai,
we went to Japan.
Anywhere he wanted to go
that he found of interest,
I took him, and he's still
the love of my life.
I'm just not the love of his no more.
And this is the first serious girlfriend.
The very first girlfriend ever.
It's very normal, you know,
for them to kind of disconnect.
It's a hard situation because the more
you push her away,
-the more he's gonna run away.
-I know that, so I can't do that.
-A lot.
-Like, it is.
I don't know how you did three kids.
[laughter]
Especially, you know,
being married as long as we have.
Yeah, I don't either.
I've never been able to connect
with the women who are like,
"My life is perfect. My marriage
is perfect. My children are perfect."
"My happiness is a 9." [giggles]
-No.
-Stop. You've been married 20 years.
I know good and well
your happiness is not a 9.
[laughter]
Stop. Let's stop right now.
Yeah, after 20 years, you're a 9.
When you throw children
into the mix of your marriage
and you're, like, focused on the kids,
it's very easy to not have
the proper communication
to stay connected and in touch
with each other.
You get in this space where
you're you grow apart.
Robert Sr., he's in love with his son.
He'll do anything for him.
And I'm like the helicopter mom.
So I think we became partners
as opposed to a marriage.
Friendship.
Partnership.
Do you think he's gotten complacent,
and if he thought you were
really going to leave,
then maybe he would make
more of an effort?
My marriage was arranged.
-We have to make it work.
-Right.
-Like, yeah.
-Right.
-So leaving is
-It's not an option.
I always say I have beauty in all my mess.
The reality is that I am married
to my grandmother's second husband,
which was my step-grandfather.
Before she passed, she made it very clear
that she wanted me to be
the one to take her place
in the church and inherit everything.
That came with homes, money, our church,
and also marrying her husband.
Don't think it wasn't weird,
'cause it was.
But I did it because
I trusted my grandmother,
and I'm so glad I did it.
If something knocks you down,
just get back up, and I learned that
through my mom.
She chopped my heart up.
I put it back together,
made a prettier one,
and I learned from
How old were you when you disconnected?
-Mm, like 19.
-Young. That's very hard.
It was hard in the beginning.
That was my best friend.
That's who I went to dinner with.
That's who I
Yeah, and then she did a switch
with money.
-It was about money.
-But it's not money.
It's the love of it.
It's the root of evil.
I'm not gonna lie. It was all bizarre.
I was actually 22 when we got married.
It split our church. My mom had a fit
'cause she wanted the church.
She wanted my grandmother's place.
My mom felt like she was the one
that should've been marrying Robert Sr.
The wedding night was
everything was weird
-Did you sleep together the first night?
-No.
Thank goodness I was on my period.
And the period lasted
for at least two weeks.
"Still on it?" "Still on."
It got awkward.
He's like, "You're still"
"Yep, I still am," so I stretched it out
because, like, 28th day, I was like, mm.
I had to get past that.
I started to pray myself.
I started to seek, you know,
that higher help myself,
and it worked out so good,
like it couldn't have been better.
I made my mind up to detox all the people
that I knew was not beneficial to my life.
Like, I cleansed every leech,
every drainer,
anything that I thought was too much.
There are good people out there.
That's who you have to seek out.
Are you good at that?
Usually I have a sense,
but sometimes I don't trust my own sense,
and that's when I get in trouble.
I can't be distracted
by things that don't matter.
And I focus on my son, Robert Sr.,
and then my church.
I wanna hear more about your church,
and I would like to come sometime.
I would love to invite you.
Whitney and her dad are coming this week.
-I would love it.
-Yeah?
Would love it.
-That would be amazing.
-Thank you for the pressure.
[laughs]
No pressure! It's on.
I'm gonna make some guacamole
because we have a gazillion avocados.
What do you want me to do?
We need to chop tomato and onion.
Okay. I'm gonna make my almond milk.
I've had my almonds marinating in water
for, like, five days now.
When Chloe, Reid, and I found out
about my parents' separation,
I took the semester off
from school to support my mom
in whatever she's dealing with with my dad
and to work on my clothing line.
But as much as she does have
friends coming
in and out of the house
or, like, visitors staying,
no one can keep her as grounded as I can.
-So, what's going on, Brooksy?
-[utensil clatters]
Well, I'm pretty sure you could tell
Chloe and I were very uncomfortable
the night Jen was here.
[chanting] Grinder, grinder,
grinder. [laughs]
[Chloe] What?
Um yeah.
I mean, it was kind of a surprise for me,
and I'm sorry
if you guys were uncomfortable.
[whirring]
[whirring loudly]
[whirring stops]
[Brooks] We were.
Wait, that, like, actually
just worked. That's crazy.
She can act however she wants to act,
just don't act that way in your house.
Just very uncalled for.
I totally hear you on that.
I don't need Chloe having
that experience either.
Chloe and I were in
a really uncomfortable position.
Chloe and I saw parts of that woman
we never need to see again.
I understand. I understand.
But she wanted to have
a sleepover on Saturday.
That's definitely not happening.
Me and Chloe wanna spend time with you.
That's fair enough. I hear you.
While I've taught Brooks
to voice his opinions
and certainly advocate for them,
at times, he can be a bit much
and a little relentless,
but he does have a point here.
What are you gonna do about it?
Um, I'll text her and let her know that
we're not gonna do a sleepover
on Saturday,
that I wanna spend time with you guys.
Yeah, it's Chloe's last night.
It's, like, what we should do.
No, I agree.
Well, no offense,
you're a CEO of Meredith Marks.
You're never gonna have time
for a sleepover.
[laughs] Yeah.
[upbeat music playing]
[Mary] Where's the drink? What's up?
Let me get it real quick.
-Did he fix the stove?
-Get him back out here.
-What are you getting fixed on the stove?
-This back one.
Okay, so did I tell you how you start it?
Sometimes I use the middle
to start everybody.
-Ain't no problem gettin' started.
-How come men don't like instructions?
I turned the stove on.
You don't need to hire people to do this.
All you have to do is ask me.
-You gonna help me?
-You got it, Miss Mary.
-Now why are you Come on.
-I'm going to my seat.
You got all these burners up for what?
I didn't know which burner
to turn off, so I left 'em all.
I see that. Thank you.
-You're welcome.
-I appreciate that.
We need to get serious
about Robert and school.
Yeah. [sighs]
Robert's not learning anything
at this school.
He's going there
'cause his girlfriend goes there.
-Spoiled. Not a bad way, but he's spoiled.
-He's spoiled.
-I was spoiled.
-You're still spoiled.
What do you mean?
-You don't even grow up.
-Okay, wait a minute.
Who's spoiling me if I'm still spoiled?
You're spoiled rotten.
I was nothing like neither of you.
-You didn't say that, did you?
-Yeah. I was the cream of the crop.
You're a brat right now.
-How?
-You know you're spoiled.
[sighs]
After Robert Sr. and I married,
I kinda had to get to know him.
I really felt like, wow,
my grandmother really nailed it.
Like, if I could pick a guy,
this is what I'd pick.
Then after Robert was born,
I drifted into being a mom,
and he drifted into being Robert Sr.
He needs boarding school.
I found one. He got accepted.
It's in L.A., though.
-I don't know.
-Thank you.
He's in the 11th grade.
I want him to finish
those last two grades
with an honorable school
so he can choose a college.
I understand you. I got you.
He's too intelligent.
His brain is distracted
-with this infatuation love.
-Yes.
I'm super connected to my son.
I don't need to be in his space,
he doesn't need to be in my space
to know I feel close to him.
But at the same time,
I'm super major on education.
I think boarding school is
appropriate for him right now
because of the fact that it's time.
It's that age where he could
either spiral up or down,
and forget the girlfriend.
He's going to boarding school,
if that's what I say.
He doesn't know that yet, though.
Robert!
-Bubbs.
-Mm-hmm.
We need to talk to you about school, babe.
Okay, getting school out of the way,
you can do whatever you want.
You're on your own.
I want you to, like, be strong.
You wanna have a brain.
-Are you learning over there?
-No.
Like when you went to school in New York,
you're not learning there.
You're learning bad habits.
You don't wanna go to a boarding school,
even if it's co-ed?
It's in L.A.
Excuse me, brother.
Just please.
Be honest. What do you feel about it?
I feel like it isn't necessary.
[whirring]
I feel like I could go
to a regular school.
You feel you can go to a regular school.
I feel like I'd just be lonely.
I don't want to go to boarding school
'cause I can't be without my girlfriend
or you guys.
Ohh! She's a friend of us.
No.
So you are clearly
It's clear you're going
to a different school, right?
Mm-hmm.
-Okay, love you. Bye.
-Love you, too.
When's the last time you went to church?
Uh, last time I've been to church,
that's a good question.
It's probably been a good 10 years for me.
Yeah, about 10 years.
Over the past 10 years,
my dad has struggled
with addiction to prescriptions
and painkillers,
and it wasn't until this last year
that he recognized and acknowledged
that he needed help.
So my dad decided to do 30 days of rehab
and is considering going
into sober living.
It's like I'm starting over
at 63 years old.
But I look at it as a blessing.
I prayed for the rain.
Now I gotta deal with the mud.
Ever since my dad left the Mormon church
because of his addiction,
I've been his only support system,
and I'm realizing
that I can't do this all alone.
I can't be everything for my dad.
So I think going to church
is a great opportunity for him
to feel more love, more community,
and have more support.
This is my friend Meredith.
Because that's what my dad needs
right now to stay sober.
[up-tempo gospel music playing]
It's a party.
[cheering]
Before my grandmother left,
I felt like I was in training.
She used to say, "I'm gonna give you
everything I didn't have growing up,
everything I didn't have as a little girl,
a young girl, I want you to have it."
And when my grandmother passed,
like, people didn't know what to do.
She was the head of our church.
[amplified voice]
We believe in a true, living God.
-[congregation exclaims]
-So I just got up,
and I thought there was
something pulling me,
"This is what you're supposed to do,
whether people like it, they accept it,
whether your mom is okay with it."
I knew I had to do it.
Yeah, we gon' say something here.
-[congregation exclaiming]
-This is the truth!
I believe in it, to let God be God!
[exclaims] Whoo!
While I'm not super religious,
I am Jewish.
I am definitely in the minority in Utah.
There's not a ton of us here.
I know God!
I'm really impressed with how Mary
seems to connect with her congregation.
It's incredible to watch.
I have to thank God
for all these visitors
Yeah!
-for coming. We love you.
-Yes!
-[cheers and applause]
-And my
beautiful family.
[voice breaking] Whitney, Meredith.
[congregation affirming]
God knows all about it.
-Yes, that's right.
-He knows your problem.
And I said if He leads you to it,
He'll see you through it.
-[congregation affirming]
-He's that kind of God.
I said, "Help me, Lord."
He said, "I only help them
that help themself."
-You apply something.
-[congregation affirming]
He'll meet you there.
-He's the God!
-[congregation affirming]
Who's able for the Kingdom,
for the Father?
He loved me first!
[congregation affirming]
He loved you first!
[congregation affirming]
This is the first time
in the last five years
that I've seen my dad
feel loved and accepted.
You see Meredith. You see Whitney.
You see her father.
You see what they need.
God, bring us together.
Let us know it's okay to love.
It's okay to give up so You can take over.
In Jesus' name, heal! Heal!
[cheers and applause]
And I'm visibly seeing him
feel that he's worth his life.
-Go, Mary, go!
-Mary!
Oh, thank you.
You guys, the dress oh, my gosh.
See, every every time
I'm talking about the dress
I have makeup on and I can't cry,
-but I wanna cry. I
-[laughs]
-Just hire a professional crier.
-I asked Keri to cry for me.
But you need to hire someone,
like, where it's like
you have to cry now, you know?
This is Shah Squad. This is not
amateur hour, people, okay?
We're gonna test out the look, the hair,
the vision of what I'm gonna be tomorrow,
and 1920s has never looked so good.
Jeff, this is how I would like
my shots presented to me
garnished with blueberries and lime.
Cheers.
Here's to the 1920s.
I have an entire staff
that works for me every day.
They're called the Shah Squad.
[all] Jen Shah!
My team is more than just my employees.
It's lonely when Sharrieff's away a lot,
and that's why I guess I lean on them.
I depend on them a lot
to fill that role in my life
as, like, my family.
Meredith and I had planned
to have a sleepover
-after the party.
-Yeah.
I feel like you mentioned that.
Yeah, and then this morning
when I woke up,
I get a text from Meredith, and it said,
"Hey, Jen, I need to cancel
the sleepover because
Chloe wants to spend some time
with me after the party."
It just bugged me,
'cause I was over
with Meredith the other night.
-Hmm.
-I can't believe Meredith
cancels the sleepover 'cause Chloe's here?
Chloe is in her first year
of college, Meredith.
She don't wanna hang out with you.
You know, my feelings are hurt now.
I just want real people
that are gonna reciprocate
the love, loyalty, and respect
that I would give them.
Yeah, absolutely.
[gentle, upbeat music playing]
Everything looks so good.
-I know. We got the staff pictures.
-Know which one was me?
No, I can't figure out which one is you.
-The cutest one.
-Well, of course it is.
This is me.
Oh, my gosh. Look at that.
Everything looks so good.
Hello! Our first queen is arriving.
-Look at you.
-Hi.
No one's gonna believe you're pregnant.
I'm thrilled to support
and celebrate these young women
embarking on motherhood
and the adventure it is.
You look so hot.
Can we talk about the boobs?
-Sammy's boobs!
-Sam's boobs.
But the darker side of me just
wants to scream, "Go back, run."
We gotta see the bellies.
Whitney, push it out.
Arch your back. There you go.
These girls think they're going to pop out
these perfect Gerber babies,
sleep train them in five minutes,
and have the picture-perfect
Instagram life.
[laughter]
Based on everything in my life,
that is not what's gonna happen.
[photographer] Ready, one, two, three.
-I'm trying to smize.
-[laughter]
Oh, my gosh.
-Heather Gay.
-You look so good. [laughs]
Hi.
Oh!
Oh, snappy-snap.
[laughter]
Mwah.
Oh, my gosh. How many swans died for this?
Hey, ladies.
I need all the pregnant
all the preggy queens.
This is, like, perfect.
Welcome to our baby shower,
and congratulations to the five queens.
Five queens. Oh, my gosh.
So grateful for y'all to be here,
and want you to know
how much love and support you have.
I'm trying not to cry.
[voice breaking] We are horrified
that you're pregnant so young,
but it's fine.
[laughter]
Because we are here to support
and love you.
Looking at all these young moms
starting their lives out,
makes me realize that
I really wanna reevaluate
what I'm teaching my children.
I want them to decide what they believe,
and I will support them.
What you do have control over
is who you are to them,
and it's not easy.
You don't have to be perfect.
You don't even have to be good at it.
No one is.
We want you to know that
anything is possible.
Now the moms get to sit, and we
have some games for the dads.
-Mark, you got the games?
-Yep.
-We're blowing the balloons?
-Any size you want.
Take three ping-pong balls.
-Are you starving?
-Yeah.
Let's grab a bite
and have them do their games.
-Okay.
-Let's go get a bite.
Come on.
Thank you so much.
All right, cheers, Mama.
[indistinct conversations]
Really quick, I like you with a ponytail.
Thank you so much.
I'm so excited about the party.
-Oh, yeah, tomorrow night.
-I'm excited,
'cause we haven't all been
together in a while.
We haven't.
We haven't all been together since skiing.
-Cheers to ski day.
-Yes.
Clean slates.
Nice! We have a winner.
So speaking of clean slate,
like, I truly mean it
that I'm gonna start with a clean slate.
-I've invited Lisa.
-Is she coming?
-She's coming.
-Tomorrow?
Absolutely.
-Are you bringing Sharrieff?
-He'll come later,
but he can't be there
when the party starts.
Time out. Rewind.
Is Mary Cosby coming to this party?
-Yeah.
-Oh, Lord, have mercy.
Why?
I like Mary.
Do you feel clean slate with Mary?
I don't give a [bleep].
Clean slate, dirty slate.
You're irrelevant. I don't care.
How are we back here again?
I thought Mary had apologized to Jen,
and they had moved on.
How is this still kicking?
Like, it should be dead and buried.
I will be your friend, ride or die.
You can call me,
but don't attack my family.
I mean, she admitted it.
Everybody knows
if you're friends with Mary,
you're gonna have to put up with, like,
The Twilight Zone every other day.
That's just what happens.
But when she made the comment
about my aunt,
that's really hurt me
and cut me to the core,
because she knew out of any
of the other girls
how close I was to my aunt,
so that just proves to me
Mary doesn't really care
about my feelings.
You wanna know why I loved the church?
-Help me here.
-I took my father,
who's in drug rehab,
struggling with addiction,
to her church with Meredith.
The community of people there
were so supportive.
For the first time, my dad felt loved
'cause the power of the music,
and, like, me and Meredith
were hugging him.
So it was a beautiful night for me.
Meredith, you're gonna go
to Mary's church?
I feel like Meredith likes her
and has this allegiance to her,
-so I wanna be respective
-Meredith wants to play Switzerland.
Everybody needs a Switzerland friend.
It's a favorite nation.
But then you're not really a friend.
I get why Whitney went to Mary's church.
Her dad's going through a lot.
I understand that.
But for Meredith to go to Mary's church
Meredith knows what has gone on
between Mary and I.
I mean, this was a personal dig
against me.
Meredith, you cannot be friends with her
and be friends with me.
I'm not saying choose.
I'm just saying tell me.
I understand Jen and Mary don't get along.
However, I don't understand why Jen
is trying to get Meredith to pick a side.
In my mind, there are no sides to choose.
I generally think that
she's just doing her.
-There's something cool about that.
-If you really like Mary
and you really like me,
don't you think there's a conflict?
-Well, for sure, but like
-Bitch, vote.
I don't know what to do.
I'm not into the '20s that much.
-I can do '70s.
-You're looking for the '20s.
-I could Oh, my gosh.
-But it's not '70s.
-Wrong era.
-Could that be '20s?
Actually, that could be very cute.
That dress is a little conservative
for you, don't you think?
I don't think women, like, had boob jobs
and put their boobs out in the '20s.
Got it. No, it's actually really cute.
Gold is your thing.
What are you smoking out of this tonight?
Oh, you know, something a little legal,
-something maybe not so legal.
-I like that.
-Are you guys ready?
-Yes.
-Yes.
-Okay, I'm coming.
Ooh!
[cheering]
You know if you didn't clap,
you'd be fired anyway.
[laughter]
-Thank you.
-You're welcome.
Let me get up in here, out of the way.
-Hello, darling.
-Hi!
We're looking for those liquid antiques.
We might have a closet for that.
We love a good closet.
A hundred years ago,
during Prohibition in Utah,
there was definitely no alcohol,
no dancers, and no strippers.
Hello.
But at the Prohibition bar,
this is just a regular Saturday night.
[indistinct conversations]
Ohh. It's amazing.
You look amazing, doll.
You've outdone yourself, darlin'.
I love that she's in full character!
What brings you in today?
-Gatsby.
-Of course.
-Is it not obvi?
-Perfect.
-Yo.
-Oh, my God.
[indistinct conversations]
I love the 1920s.
So nice to see you.
[cheering]
-How are you?
-So good to see you tonight.
-I love your suit.
-Oh, thank you.
This was my take on the theme.
Meredith knows how to rock
the bell bottoms,
but I was wondering
if she misread the invitation,
because it was a 1920s party,
not a 1970s party.
-Good to see you.
-You as well.
My brother and sister are here!
[laughter]
[announcer] Ladies and gentlemen,
do not touch the performers tonight.
That's what's called a felony.
[cheering]
I can't. Too much vulva.
There's a theme with Whitney.
She definitely loves the stripper pole.
[cheering]
[Lisa] How is this the 1920s?
I'm shy! I'm shy!
I was bringing decadence,
and they were bringing Depression.
-[cheering]
-[Mary] Sorry, baby.
Oh!
-Hi.
-Well, hello.
I heard this was the 1920s party.
-Mama.
-Hello, beautiful.
-Wow.
-Oh, my God.
It's been a rough couple of days.
Meredith is being really shady.
I don't know why.
So I've had a couple drinks
before I go into the party.
Hi, Mama!
Meredith, really?
See this, girl.
Are you kidding me? It's so, like, '20s.
-Well, that's why
-Oh, my gosh.
My '20s jewelry
and my little bit of fringe.
Oh, you look pretty.
I really wanna give Meredith
the benefit of the doubt,
but the first thing I see
is her over in the corner
with Mary M. Cosby.
Oh, my. Lord have mercy. Are you What?
It's like somebody just, like,
stuck a knife in my heart.
Next time on The Real Housewives
of Salt Lake City
You think she's a [bleep] good friend?!
Good luck with that [bleep], Meredith.
Thank you. I'm disengaging.
I'm not engaging.
Like, are you serious?!
You're gonna go with Mary,
who [bleep] her grandfather?
-Jen
-Don't yell at me!
Shut the [bleep] up!
I wanna go the [bleep] home!
Talk to me about Saturday.
Girl, last week was just a hard week.
My dad passed away a year ago.
This has been the hardest thing
that I've ever dealt with in my life.
100% I feel lonely.
I put on a good front, but I'm lonely.
-Something I have to tell you.
-What?
Seth and I have been separated.
-I'm gonna cry.
-Don't cry. You're gonna make me cry.
-I like events that are intimate.
-Me too.
To be together and the girls
to, like, iron stuff out.
I love that.
Thank you all for coming.
I will say what all y'all are thinking
but don't wanna say.
I wouldn't say the things you said,
sweetheart.
I'm just saying.
[housewife] Previously on
The Real Housewives of Salt Lake City
I want you to experiment,
but not gonna let you drown.
I'm a single mom
and I'm raising three daughters.
I basically married into Mormon royalty.
But it all came crashing down
when we got divorced five years ago.
My grandmother chose me
to marry her husband.
We were kind of an arranged marriage.
-I'm gonna do a toast.
-Yeah.
-Happy birthday week, ladies.
-Whoo!
[shrieking]
My aunt just got both legs amputated.
So when you said it smells like
hospital in here, that hurt me.
-What do you want me to do?
-Disrespecting family?
Are you [bleep] kidding me?
I'm sorry if I hurt you.
[Jen] Mary M. Cosby, I'm watching you.
In this town, I'm Queen Bee and MVP.
When you take cheap shots,
always expect a hangover.
This rose isn't scared
to handle a little prick.
Jealousy is a disease
to which I say, "Get well soon."
I love God, but I will read you
like a scripture.
Just like my pioneer ancestors,
I'm trying to blaze a new trail.
[gentle, ethereal music playing]
[upbeat music playing]
[Lisa] John, I need a Diet Coke so badly.
Henry, for real, like, for real,
you have to work on the Ten Commandments.
-I am.
-[Lisa] It's not hard. Just give me two.
Thou shall not smoke.
Thou shall not do anything bad.
Okay, but, like, what's bad?
Looking at porn.
Yep. Definitely stay away.
This is just like working out,
using weights.
Basically, it's gonna be burning
and permanently killing fat cells.
This is the most exercise
I've done for five months.
That's wonderful, Brooks.
[laughter]
-[man] Ladies.
-[Whitney] Hello.
Welcome to Marie's Antiques and Oddities.
What are you here for today?
I am checking the space out
to hold an event here.
An event at an antique store.
At an antique store.
What kind of event?
Well, something a little wet.
Not so dry.
So you know during Prohibition,
it is a dry country, right?
Yeah.
-Let's go inside.
-All right.
Welcome.
To the secret door that I knew existed.
I love this place.
-Your party is how many people?
-Expecting about 30.
So what we're talking about
is taking at least this front section here
and this whole area.
Perfect, 'cause I love a good theme.
Our happiness is your happiness.
We love that.
-You got that, Heather?
-Yeah, I got it.
[laughs]
Try to balance.
They're kinda heavy.
-Hey, guys.
-Hey.
-Hi, Brady! What's up, baby?
-Good to see ya.
What's going on?
For all the Beauty Labbers
that are pregnant.
-Aren't they so Beauty Lab?
-They're pretty They're sweet.
They think we're gonna give diapers
and bottles, onesies and jammies.
-We're giving 'em Range Rovers.
-Start 'em young,
Start 'em with the things that matter.
I don't know if it's something
in the water or the Botox at Beauty Lab,
but five of our 20 employees
are all pregnant for the first time,
and they are all having baby boys.
So we wanna celebrate them in a huge way.
[Jen] Have to walk me up so I don't slip.
Okay. Oh, my gosh.
Hurry up. My feet are freezing.
[knock on door]
-What's up, Tweety Bird?!
-Hi!
-Look at you!
-I am Tweety Bird.
[laughs] You're so fabulous.
-Hi.
-Hi!
You have to see our cute Range Rovers.
These are so cute.
Walk me through the whole thing.
We have interactive games.
We're having everyone bring
a baby picture.
-Like me?
-Yeah.
We're gonna have them blind on a wall,
and you have to say,
"That's Reagan. That's Jen Shah."
The important detail is the theme.
The reason it's white,
and you're wearing all white, right?
-Right.
-It's really symbolic,
and I wanna make sure
that these young moms
who are so focused on having
the perfect delivery, the perfect baby,
that it's not about perfection.
It's about love, you know?
A Mormon prophet, Harold B. Lee,
said, "There's no work
that a woman will ever do outside the home
that will be equal
to what she does as a mother
raising her children inside the home."
We are successful Mormons
based on how we raise our children,
how happy we keep our husbands
and how perfect our family is or appears.
Hi, lovey.
Hello! Hi!
Even though in our hearts
we know that that's not important,
that's really the social code that we all
adhere to and we're judged on.
They literally have 16-inch ones
or 4-inch, so I did the 8-inch.
Don't you think that's the perfect size?
Let's see what they look like
when we get the bows on them.
We were looking at baby pics.
Let me show you a few pictures
and see if it's completely Georgia.
This is the one in our house right now.
Oh, my gosh. That's so cute.
None of my babies have eyebrows.
Check this one out.
-Who is that?
-That's Georgia.
She's turning six, and she wanted
a rock star bunny party.
Why do you not have this
blown up and framed?
Because my world shut down
when I got divorced.
When Billy and I separated,
I didn't take pictures.
I stopped everything and so
I don't think Georgia
has seen these pictures.
-What happened? How did things
-I got divorced.
So when you got divorced,
why did you feel that way, though?
Because you or other people
were making you feel like,
"Heather, you're divorced.
That's not good"?
Because me. All I was born to do
was to have a family.
When you get divorced,
that's taken away from you.
I chose him not because
he was the love of my life,
but because
-He was Mormon.
-He was Mormon.
My husband left me
after 11 years of marriage.
He said he didn't wanna be
married to me anymore,
and I really resented him for leaving me
because I felt like my entire life
I had curtailed my natural instincts
in order to achieve this family
and this marriage in the temple
and these children,
and I had given up a lot.
Now he was saying he was giving up on me.
Four generations on both sides,
mom and dad, zero divorce.
I'm the first.
See, that's that label put on you guys.
That doesn't mean anything to us.
-It means everything.
-No, it doesn't.
What do you mean,
it doesn't mean anything?
My heart is Mormon,
so what are you gonna do?
-Because you're a good person.
-How am I Mormon and divorced?
-That doesn't make you a bad person.
-How does it make me Mormon?
So should you stay married,
then, and it's terrible?
100 million percent.
[producer] Have you ever been in love?
[scoffs] I don't know.
I think that, like,
when I was 15, I was in love,
you know, with someone that
didn't even like me back.
[laughs] But otherwise,
I don't think I've ever been
deeply in love, no.
I have three daughters. Am I gonna
put that same pressure on them?
That's why you need to do
the right thing and be an example.
If you stayed with him
and it wasn't right,
they think, "This is what we do."
And you foster generations
and generations of females
thinking, "This is just
what we do." Robot. No.
You're empowering them, taking those steps
that are so hard so that
your daughters don't have to.
-Time for cocktails.
-[whirring]
Oh!
[bleep].
Are you a moron?
-[laughs] Okay, well, I wasn't looking.
-How intoxicated are you?
-Are you kidding?
-I don't want to deal with that.
-Where's Leticia?
-[laughs]
When Seth is gone, I love having
my kids home because
at least I feel like I have
a part of my family with me.
Do you have a mop?
I'm sure we do. I don't know where it is.
Classic.
Chloe's 18 years old.
It's her first year away at school,
and I just feel so fortunate
that she wants to come home
and wants to spend time with me.
There is no one I would rather
be with than my children.
[knock on door] -Ah!
-[dog barking]
-Who's here?
[singsong] Hello!
How are you?
-[gasps]
-Hello.
-Hi, guys.
-Hi!
-[muffled] My sweet little babies.
-How are you?
I love you so much. Chloe!
How are you?
What do you want to drink?
-I want that right there.
-A margarita.
I made them in the blender,
but I didn't put the lid on.
Of course. You can't use
Why do you keep pretending
like you're domestic.
-[barking]
-Teddy! No!
-[laughs] Get off the table.
-Teddy's like, "I ain't listening to you."
The Shah ski chalet it's really big.
It's not fun to be there by yourself.
I love Teddy.
The boys are gone doing their own thing.
There's no one to talk to.
It's comforting to know Meredith and I
have similar situations where our husbands
aren't always here all the time.
I actually don't get as pissed off
at Sharrieff because I'm like, "I'm good."
"I'm going to Meredith's tonight."
Are you excited for the '20s party?
-I'm excited for my outfit.
-What are you wearing?
I'm gonna be a 1920s Hollywood madam.
I don't wanna be
the basic bitch 1920 flapper.
Well, I can't wait to see it.
So here's the thing.
Sharrieff has, like,
some coaches' whatever thing,
so Saturday night we're doing
sleepover slumber party,
facials, high kicks.
[Chloe] What are high kicks?
Like shoes?
No, high kicks. I would do one right now,
but you'd see my vagina.
-Like a literal Oh.
-Yes.
[chanting] Grindr, Grindr, Grindr.
[laughs]
[Chloe] What?
I'm feeling really uncomfortable.
[laughs]
Her vagina is in my face.
[Chloe] What are you doing?
You know your mom
has fantastic high kicks.
[Chloe] Oh, God.
I'm beyond shocked that my mom
is around someone doing that
in front of her children.
Um, Brooks and I have to go to Best Buy.
They're going to Best Buy?
If you guys wanna go, you can go.
Even though you birthed these children
out of your vagina, they're my kids.
[laughs]
-Gross.
-[laughter]
Bye.
[laughter]
[upbeat music playing]
-So you ready?
-You guys ready?
-Yeah.
-Okay.
I want you to show me your best skills.
Like pretend you're gonna get
your driver's license today.
[John] You guys have fun today.
I'm not going.
[Lisa] Oh, my gosh. It stresses me out.
I'm literally gonna be praying.
-Close your eyes.
-That's what you do. I can't.
I'm gonna, like, freak out.
I'm driving. I call the shots.
[Lisa] Time goes by so fast.
You really don't have your kids
for that long.
It's like they're renters for 18 years,
and then they can't wait to bail on you.
Eyes closed. Plug your ears.
Everything will be great.
In business,
I feel like I can handle anything.
Throw things at me.
Things change all the time.
I can fix anything.
I feel like I'm a great problem solver.
Okay, so everybody have
their seatbelts on?
-Literally say a prayer.
-I already did.
[Lisa] Okay, good.
Dear Father, don't let us
hit anybody or anything,
and don't let anyone hit us,
in the name of Jesus Christ.
-Are your mirrors right? Okay.
-Mm-hmm.
I say that in my head
every time I get in the car with him.
[engine starts]
Jack, I need you to go easy on me, okay?
I love taking you.
No, I don't, really. I'm lying.
Driving is, like,
such a big responsibility.
I have a strong pull-out game, though.
Yeah. [sighs]
Remember, confident, not cocky.
Okay, so you just wanna be
super situationally aware.
Just think about all the little kids,
-where they are, who runs out.
-Mm-hmm.
It's a very busy road up here.
See how they just pulled in front of us?
Be careful. Slow up.
You wanna encourage your kids
to be calm and feel comforted,
and build them up when they're
behind the wheel of tons of metal.
-Are you stressed?
-No.
Jack, you need to be calmer
with me and more patient.
For real.
-Stay in your lane.
-I get told that too much.
Yeah. Now nicely park.
-Oh, man. Put this down.
-You did it.
Now get me a 44-ounce Diet Coke,
easy ice with lemon.
[laughs] Thank you so much.
-Hello! You look beautiful.
-Look at you.
-So good to see you.
-Your coat.
-You look gorgeous.
-Soft and cuddly.
Good evening.
Good to have you two in tonight.
Do you know what you'd like to have?
-I want the cod. Yeah.
-The cod. It's fantastic.
Would you want to share two things
or you want your own thing?
I will be eating their cod.
I will eat your cod.
I might have the cod, too.
-It sounds really good.
-Fantastic.
-Thank you.
-Thank you.
-So tell me, how are you?
-Good,
but I'm going through this thing
with Robert,
and I don't understand it.
We've always been inseparable.
But he turned 17 and meets this girl,
-and now it's like he's an adult.
-Doing his own thing.
I have a beautiful son.
His name is Robert.
He's named after his dad.
When I had my son, I went into
a whole 'nother level of love,
and every birthday, we went to Dubai,
we went to Japan.
Anywhere he wanted to go
that he found of interest,
I took him, and he's still
the love of my life.
I'm just not the love of his no more.
And this is the first serious girlfriend.
The very first girlfriend ever.
It's very normal, you know,
for them to kind of disconnect.
It's a hard situation because the more
you push her away,
-the more he's gonna run away.
-I know that, so I can't do that.
-A lot.
-Like, it is.
I don't know how you did three kids.
[laughter]
Especially, you know,
being married as long as we have.
Yeah, I don't either.
I've never been able to connect
with the women who are like,
"My life is perfect. My marriage
is perfect. My children are perfect."
"My happiness is a 9." [giggles]
-No.
-Stop. You've been married 20 years.
I know good and well
your happiness is not a 9.
[laughter]
Stop. Let's stop right now.
Yeah, after 20 years, you're a 9.
When you throw children
into the mix of your marriage
and you're, like, focused on the kids,
it's very easy to not have
the proper communication
to stay connected and in touch
with each other.
You get in this space where
you're you grow apart.
Robert Sr., he's in love with his son.
He'll do anything for him.
And I'm like the helicopter mom.
So I think we became partners
as opposed to a marriage.
Friendship.
Partnership.
Do you think he's gotten complacent,
and if he thought you were
really going to leave,
then maybe he would make
more of an effort?
My marriage was arranged.
-We have to make it work.
-Right.
-Like, yeah.
-Right.
-So leaving is
-It's not an option.
I always say I have beauty in all my mess.
The reality is that I am married
to my grandmother's second husband,
which was my step-grandfather.
Before she passed, she made it very clear
that she wanted me to be
the one to take her place
in the church and inherit everything.
That came with homes, money, our church,
and also marrying her husband.
Don't think it wasn't weird,
'cause it was.
But I did it because
I trusted my grandmother,
and I'm so glad I did it.
If something knocks you down,
just get back up, and I learned that
through my mom.
She chopped my heart up.
I put it back together,
made a prettier one,
and I learned from
How old were you when you disconnected?
-Mm, like 19.
-Young. That's very hard.
It was hard in the beginning.
That was my best friend.
That's who I went to dinner with.
That's who I
Yeah, and then she did a switch
with money.
-It was about money.
-But it's not money.
It's the love of it.
It's the root of evil.
I'm not gonna lie. It was all bizarre.
I was actually 22 when we got married.
It split our church. My mom had a fit
'cause she wanted the church.
She wanted my grandmother's place.
My mom felt like she was the one
that should've been marrying Robert Sr.
The wedding night was
everything was weird
-Did you sleep together the first night?
-No.
Thank goodness I was on my period.
And the period lasted
for at least two weeks.
"Still on it?" "Still on."
It got awkward.
He's like, "You're still"
"Yep, I still am," so I stretched it out
because, like, 28th day, I was like, mm.
I had to get past that.
I started to pray myself.
I started to seek, you know,
that higher help myself,
and it worked out so good,
like it couldn't have been better.
I made my mind up to detox all the people
that I knew was not beneficial to my life.
Like, I cleansed every leech,
every drainer,
anything that I thought was too much.
There are good people out there.
That's who you have to seek out.
Are you good at that?
Usually I have a sense,
but sometimes I don't trust my own sense,
and that's when I get in trouble.
I can't be distracted
by things that don't matter.
And I focus on my son, Robert Sr.,
and then my church.
I wanna hear more about your church,
and I would like to come sometime.
I would love to invite you.
Whitney and her dad are coming this week.
-I would love it.
-Yeah?
Would love it.
-That would be amazing.
-Thank you for the pressure.
[laughs]
No pressure! It's on.
I'm gonna make some guacamole
because we have a gazillion avocados.
What do you want me to do?
We need to chop tomato and onion.
Okay. I'm gonna make my almond milk.
I've had my almonds marinating in water
for, like, five days now.
When Chloe, Reid, and I found out
about my parents' separation,
I took the semester off
from school to support my mom
in whatever she's dealing with with my dad
and to work on my clothing line.
But as much as she does have
friends coming
in and out of the house
or, like, visitors staying,
no one can keep her as grounded as I can.
-So, what's going on, Brooksy?
-[utensil clatters]
Well, I'm pretty sure you could tell
Chloe and I were very uncomfortable
the night Jen was here.
[chanting] Grinder, grinder,
grinder. [laughs]
[Chloe] What?
Um yeah.
I mean, it was kind of a surprise for me,
and I'm sorry
if you guys were uncomfortable.
[whirring]
[whirring loudly]
[whirring stops]
[Brooks] We were.
Wait, that, like, actually
just worked. That's crazy.
She can act however she wants to act,
just don't act that way in your house.
Just very uncalled for.
I totally hear you on that.
I don't need Chloe having
that experience either.
Chloe and I were in
a really uncomfortable position.
Chloe and I saw parts of that woman
we never need to see again.
I understand. I understand.
But she wanted to have
a sleepover on Saturday.
That's definitely not happening.
Me and Chloe wanna spend time with you.
That's fair enough. I hear you.
While I've taught Brooks
to voice his opinions
and certainly advocate for them,
at times, he can be a bit much
and a little relentless,
but he does have a point here.
What are you gonna do about it?
Um, I'll text her and let her know that
we're not gonna do a sleepover
on Saturday,
that I wanna spend time with you guys.
Yeah, it's Chloe's last night.
It's, like, what we should do.
No, I agree.
Well, no offense,
you're a CEO of Meredith Marks.
You're never gonna have time
for a sleepover.
[laughs] Yeah.
[upbeat music playing]
[Mary] Where's the drink? What's up?
Let me get it real quick.
-Did he fix the stove?
-Get him back out here.
-What are you getting fixed on the stove?
-This back one.
Okay, so did I tell you how you start it?
Sometimes I use the middle
to start everybody.
-Ain't no problem gettin' started.
-How come men don't like instructions?
I turned the stove on.
You don't need to hire people to do this.
All you have to do is ask me.
-You gonna help me?
-You got it, Miss Mary.
-Now why are you Come on.
-I'm going to my seat.
You got all these burners up for what?
I didn't know which burner
to turn off, so I left 'em all.
I see that. Thank you.
-You're welcome.
-I appreciate that.
We need to get serious
about Robert and school.
Yeah. [sighs]
Robert's not learning anything
at this school.
He's going there
'cause his girlfriend goes there.
-Spoiled. Not a bad way, but he's spoiled.
-He's spoiled.
-I was spoiled.
-You're still spoiled.
What do you mean?
-You don't even grow up.
-Okay, wait a minute.
Who's spoiling me if I'm still spoiled?
You're spoiled rotten.
I was nothing like neither of you.
-You didn't say that, did you?
-Yeah. I was the cream of the crop.
You're a brat right now.
-How?
-You know you're spoiled.
[sighs]
After Robert Sr. and I married,
I kinda had to get to know him.
I really felt like, wow,
my grandmother really nailed it.
Like, if I could pick a guy,
this is what I'd pick.
Then after Robert was born,
I drifted into being a mom,
and he drifted into being Robert Sr.
He needs boarding school.
I found one. He got accepted.
It's in L.A., though.
-I don't know.
-Thank you.
He's in the 11th grade.
I want him to finish
those last two grades
with an honorable school
so he can choose a college.
I understand you. I got you.
He's too intelligent.
His brain is distracted
-with this infatuation love.
-Yes.
I'm super connected to my son.
I don't need to be in his space,
he doesn't need to be in my space
to know I feel close to him.
But at the same time,
I'm super major on education.
I think boarding school is
appropriate for him right now
because of the fact that it's time.
It's that age where he could
either spiral up or down,
and forget the girlfriend.
He's going to boarding school,
if that's what I say.
He doesn't know that yet, though.
Robert!
-Bubbs.
-Mm-hmm.
We need to talk to you about school, babe.
Okay, getting school out of the way,
you can do whatever you want.
You're on your own.
I want you to, like, be strong.
You wanna have a brain.
-Are you learning over there?
-No.
Like when you went to school in New York,
you're not learning there.
You're learning bad habits.
You don't wanna go to a boarding school,
even if it's co-ed?
It's in L.A.
Excuse me, brother.
Just please.
Be honest. What do you feel about it?
I feel like it isn't necessary.
[whirring]
I feel like I could go
to a regular school.
You feel you can go to a regular school.
I feel like I'd just be lonely.
I don't want to go to boarding school
'cause I can't be without my girlfriend
or you guys.
Ohh! She's a friend of us.
No.
So you are clearly
It's clear you're going
to a different school, right?
Mm-hmm.
-Okay, love you. Bye.
-Love you, too.
When's the last time you went to church?
Uh, last time I've been to church,
that's a good question.
It's probably been a good 10 years for me.
Yeah, about 10 years.
Over the past 10 years,
my dad has struggled
with addiction to prescriptions
and painkillers,
and it wasn't until this last year
that he recognized and acknowledged
that he needed help.
So my dad decided to do 30 days of rehab
and is considering going
into sober living.
It's like I'm starting over
at 63 years old.
But I look at it as a blessing.
I prayed for the rain.
Now I gotta deal with the mud.
Ever since my dad left the Mormon church
because of his addiction,
I've been his only support system,
and I'm realizing
that I can't do this all alone.
I can't be everything for my dad.
So I think going to church
is a great opportunity for him
to feel more love, more community,
and have more support.
This is my friend Meredith.
Because that's what my dad needs
right now to stay sober.
[up-tempo gospel music playing]
It's a party.
[cheering]
Before my grandmother left,
I felt like I was in training.
She used to say, "I'm gonna give you
everything I didn't have growing up,
everything I didn't have as a little girl,
a young girl, I want you to have it."
And when my grandmother passed,
like, people didn't know what to do.
She was the head of our church.
[amplified voice]
We believe in a true, living God.
-[congregation exclaims]
-So I just got up,
and I thought there was
something pulling me,
"This is what you're supposed to do,
whether people like it, they accept it,
whether your mom is okay with it."
I knew I had to do it.
Yeah, we gon' say something here.
-[congregation exclaiming]
-This is the truth!
I believe in it, to let God be God!
[exclaims] Whoo!
While I'm not super religious,
I am Jewish.
I am definitely in the minority in Utah.
There's not a ton of us here.
I know God!
I'm really impressed with how Mary
seems to connect with her congregation.
It's incredible to watch.
I have to thank God
for all these visitors
Yeah!
-for coming. We love you.
-Yes!
-[cheers and applause]
-And my
beautiful family.
[voice breaking] Whitney, Meredith.
[congregation affirming]
God knows all about it.
-Yes, that's right.
-He knows your problem.
And I said if He leads you to it,
He'll see you through it.
-[congregation affirming]
-He's that kind of God.
I said, "Help me, Lord."
He said, "I only help them
that help themself."
-You apply something.
-[congregation affirming]
He'll meet you there.
-He's the God!
-[congregation affirming]
Who's able for the Kingdom,
for the Father?
He loved me first!
[congregation affirming]
He loved you first!
[congregation affirming]
This is the first time
in the last five years
that I've seen my dad
feel loved and accepted.
You see Meredith. You see Whitney.
You see her father.
You see what they need.
God, bring us together.
Let us know it's okay to love.
It's okay to give up so You can take over.
In Jesus' name, heal! Heal!
[cheers and applause]
And I'm visibly seeing him
feel that he's worth his life.
-Go, Mary, go!
-Mary!
Oh, thank you.
You guys, the dress oh, my gosh.
See, every every time
I'm talking about the dress
I have makeup on and I can't cry,
-but I wanna cry. I
-[laughs]
-Just hire a professional crier.
-I asked Keri to cry for me.
But you need to hire someone,
like, where it's like
you have to cry now, you know?
This is Shah Squad. This is not
amateur hour, people, okay?
We're gonna test out the look, the hair,
the vision of what I'm gonna be tomorrow,
and 1920s has never looked so good.
Jeff, this is how I would like
my shots presented to me
garnished with blueberries and lime.
Cheers.
Here's to the 1920s.
I have an entire staff
that works for me every day.
They're called the Shah Squad.
[all] Jen Shah!
My team is more than just my employees.
It's lonely when Sharrieff's away a lot,
and that's why I guess I lean on them.
I depend on them a lot
to fill that role in my life
as, like, my family.
Meredith and I had planned
to have a sleepover
-after the party.
-Yeah.
I feel like you mentioned that.
Yeah, and then this morning
when I woke up,
I get a text from Meredith, and it said,
"Hey, Jen, I need to cancel
the sleepover because
Chloe wants to spend some time
with me after the party."
It just bugged me,
'cause I was over
with Meredith the other night.
-Hmm.
-I can't believe Meredith
cancels the sleepover 'cause Chloe's here?
Chloe is in her first year
of college, Meredith.
She don't wanna hang out with you.
You know, my feelings are hurt now.
I just want real people
that are gonna reciprocate
the love, loyalty, and respect
that I would give them.
Yeah, absolutely.
[gentle, upbeat music playing]
Everything looks so good.
-I know. We got the staff pictures.
-Know which one was me?
No, I can't figure out which one is you.
-The cutest one.
-Well, of course it is.
This is me.
Oh, my gosh. Look at that.
Everything looks so good.
Hello! Our first queen is arriving.
-Look at you.
-Hi.
No one's gonna believe you're pregnant.
I'm thrilled to support
and celebrate these young women
embarking on motherhood
and the adventure it is.
You look so hot.
Can we talk about the boobs?
-Sammy's boobs!
-Sam's boobs.
But the darker side of me just
wants to scream, "Go back, run."
We gotta see the bellies.
Whitney, push it out.
Arch your back. There you go.
These girls think they're going to pop out
these perfect Gerber babies,
sleep train them in five minutes,
and have the picture-perfect
Instagram life.
[laughter]
Based on everything in my life,
that is not what's gonna happen.
[photographer] Ready, one, two, three.
-I'm trying to smize.
-[laughter]
Oh, my gosh.
-Heather Gay.
-You look so good. [laughs]
Hi.
Oh!
Oh, snappy-snap.
[laughter]
Mwah.
Oh, my gosh. How many swans died for this?
Hey, ladies.
I need all the pregnant
all the preggy queens.
This is, like, perfect.
Welcome to our baby shower,
and congratulations to the five queens.
Five queens. Oh, my gosh.
So grateful for y'all to be here,
and want you to know
how much love and support you have.
I'm trying not to cry.
[voice breaking] We are horrified
that you're pregnant so young,
but it's fine.
[laughter]
Because we are here to support
and love you.
Looking at all these young moms
starting their lives out,
makes me realize that
I really wanna reevaluate
what I'm teaching my children.
I want them to decide what they believe,
and I will support them.
What you do have control over
is who you are to them,
and it's not easy.
You don't have to be perfect.
You don't even have to be good at it.
No one is.
We want you to know that
anything is possible.
Now the moms get to sit, and we
have some games for the dads.
-Mark, you got the games?
-Yep.
-We're blowing the balloons?
-Any size you want.
Take three ping-pong balls.
-Are you starving?
-Yeah.
Let's grab a bite
and have them do their games.
-Okay.
-Let's go get a bite.
Come on.
Thank you so much.
All right, cheers, Mama.
[indistinct conversations]
Really quick, I like you with a ponytail.
Thank you so much.
I'm so excited about the party.
-Oh, yeah, tomorrow night.
-I'm excited,
'cause we haven't all been
together in a while.
We haven't.
We haven't all been together since skiing.
-Cheers to ski day.
-Yes.
Clean slates.
Nice! We have a winner.
So speaking of clean slate,
like, I truly mean it
that I'm gonna start with a clean slate.
-I've invited Lisa.
-Is she coming?
-She's coming.
-Tomorrow?
Absolutely.
-Are you bringing Sharrieff?
-He'll come later,
but he can't be there
when the party starts.
Time out. Rewind.
Is Mary Cosby coming to this party?
-Yeah.
-Oh, Lord, have mercy.
Why?
I like Mary.
Do you feel clean slate with Mary?
I don't give a [bleep].
Clean slate, dirty slate.
You're irrelevant. I don't care.
How are we back here again?
I thought Mary had apologized to Jen,
and they had moved on.
How is this still kicking?
Like, it should be dead and buried.
I will be your friend, ride or die.
You can call me,
but don't attack my family.
I mean, she admitted it.
Everybody knows
if you're friends with Mary,
you're gonna have to put up with, like,
The Twilight Zone every other day.
That's just what happens.
But when she made the comment
about my aunt,
that's really hurt me
and cut me to the core,
because she knew out of any
of the other girls
how close I was to my aunt,
so that just proves to me
Mary doesn't really care
about my feelings.
You wanna know why I loved the church?
-Help me here.
-I took my father,
who's in drug rehab,
struggling with addiction,
to her church with Meredith.
The community of people there
were so supportive.
For the first time, my dad felt loved
'cause the power of the music,
and, like, me and Meredith
were hugging him.
So it was a beautiful night for me.
Meredith, you're gonna go
to Mary's church?
I feel like Meredith likes her
and has this allegiance to her,
-so I wanna be respective
-Meredith wants to play Switzerland.
Everybody needs a Switzerland friend.
It's a favorite nation.
But then you're not really a friend.
I get why Whitney went to Mary's church.
Her dad's going through a lot.
I understand that.
But for Meredith to go to Mary's church
Meredith knows what has gone on
between Mary and I.
I mean, this was a personal dig
against me.
Meredith, you cannot be friends with her
and be friends with me.
I'm not saying choose.
I'm just saying tell me.
I understand Jen and Mary don't get along.
However, I don't understand why Jen
is trying to get Meredith to pick a side.
In my mind, there are no sides to choose.
I generally think that
she's just doing her.
-There's something cool about that.
-If you really like Mary
and you really like me,
don't you think there's a conflict?
-Well, for sure, but like
-Bitch, vote.
I don't know what to do.
I'm not into the '20s that much.
-I can do '70s.
-You're looking for the '20s.
-I could Oh, my gosh.
-But it's not '70s.
-Wrong era.
-Could that be '20s?
Actually, that could be very cute.
That dress is a little conservative
for you, don't you think?
I don't think women, like, had boob jobs
and put their boobs out in the '20s.
Got it. No, it's actually really cute.
Gold is your thing.
What are you smoking out of this tonight?
Oh, you know, something a little legal,
-something maybe not so legal.
-I like that.
-Are you guys ready?
-Yes.
-Yes.
-Okay, I'm coming.
Ooh!
[cheering]
You know if you didn't clap,
you'd be fired anyway.
[laughter]
-Thank you.
-You're welcome.
Let me get up in here, out of the way.
-Hello, darling.
-Hi!
We're looking for those liquid antiques.
We might have a closet for that.
We love a good closet.
A hundred years ago,
during Prohibition in Utah,
there was definitely no alcohol,
no dancers, and no strippers.
Hello.
But at the Prohibition bar,
this is just a regular Saturday night.
[indistinct conversations]
Ohh. It's amazing.
You look amazing, doll.
You've outdone yourself, darlin'.
I love that she's in full character!
What brings you in today?
-Gatsby.
-Of course.
-Is it not obvi?
-Perfect.
-Yo.
-Oh, my God.
[indistinct conversations]
I love the 1920s.
So nice to see you.
[cheering]
-How are you?
-So good to see you tonight.
-I love your suit.
-Oh, thank you.
This was my take on the theme.
Meredith knows how to rock
the bell bottoms,
but I was wondering
if she misread the invitation,
because it was a 1920s party,
not a 1970s party.
-Good to see you.
-You as well.
My brother and sister are here!
[laughter]
[announcer] Ladies and gentlemen,
do not touch the performers tonight.
That's what's called a felony.
[cheering]
I can't. Too much vulva.
There's a theme with Whitney.
She definitely loves the stripper pole.
[cheering]
[Lisa] How is this the 1920s?
I'm shy! I'm shy!
I was bringing decadence,
and they were bringing Depression.
-[cheering]
-[Mary] Sorry, baby.
Oh!
-Hi.
-Well, hello.
I heard this was the 1920s party.
-Mama.
-Hello, beautiful.
-Wow.
-Oh, my God.
It's been a rough couple of days.
Meredith is being really shady.
I don't know why.
So I've had a couple drinks
before I go into the party.
Hi, Mama!
Meredith, really?
See this, girl.
Are you kidding me? It's so, like, '20s.
-Well, that's why
-Oh, my gosh.
My '20s jewelry
and my little bit of fringe.
Oh, you look pretty.
I really wanna give Meredith
the benefit of the doubt,
but the first thing I see
is her over in the corner
with Mary M. Cosby.
Oh, my. Lord have mercy. Are you What?
It's like somebody just, like,
stuck a knife in my heart.
Next time on The Real Housewives
of Salt Lake City
You think she's a [bleep] good friend?!
Good luck with that [bleep], Meredith.
Thank you. I'm disengaging.
I'm not engaging.
Like, are you serious?!
You're gonna go with Mary,
who [bleep] her grandfather?
-Jen
-Don't yell at me!
Shut the [bleep] up!
I wanna go the [bleep] home!
Talk to me about Saturday.
Girl, last week was just a hard week.
My dad passed away a year ago.
This has been the hardest thing
that I've ever dealt with in my life.
100% I feel lonely.
I put on a good front, but I'm lonely.
-Something I have to tell you.
-What?
Seth and I have been separated.
-I'm gonna cry.
-Don't cry. You're gonna make me cry.
-I like events that are intimate.
-Me too.
To be together and the girls
to, like, iron stuff out.
I love that.
Thank you all for coming.
I will say what all y'all are thinking
but don't wanna say.
I wouldn't say the things you said,
sweetheart.
I'm just saying.