Wizards (2020) s01e03 Episode Script

1
Meow.
-[bell ringing]
-[people shouting]
[Merlin] Have you any idea
what you've done?
I knew my apprentice was an ignoramus,
but traveling through time?
Time!
I think we handled ourselves just fine,
all things considered.
And, technically, it was your idea.
Well, then, you must have botched it up!
My planning is flawless.
For the record, Master,
I had nothing to do with this.
He did, which is me, and ugh!
Time travel, so confusing!
Aah! The timelines
are in complete disarray!
Look, I can fix this, I swear!
Ah-ah, your meddling has already
wreaked enough havoc on history.
Then surely we can use the Time Map
to change things back,
and then it'll all be as it was.
It doesn't work that way.
The map only offers glimpses
of possible futures.
There are no detailed instructions.
Oh, come on, it's not that bad.
[grunts]
Aah! By my beard!
Not that bad, eh?
-Oh, fuzz buckets!
-Fuzz buckets!
Your little dungeon break
must have changed fate.
Now, unless I stop it, the king will die!
[Douxie whistling tune]
[theme music playing]
Your sister, as requested, my lord.
Why have I been summoned?
The beasts in the dungeon have escaped,
aided by shadow magic.
Curious coincidence, hmm?
I was in my quarters all night,
being a good little indentured sorceress.
The creatures were seen fleeing
into the Wild Woods.
You will help take them down.
What? Why?
Consider it a test of loyalty.
Bring me their heads or yours will be
on the chopping block next.
[shouts] When you get the chance,
you do it.
-Boom, like that!
-[Steve] Onion brew?
[burps] Ah, nectar from heaven!
-I'm gonna make you knight-dudes so proud!
-[cow moos]
Today, we hunt down every last beast
who dared defy Arthur's law!
-Hip, hip!
-[knights] Huzzah!
They're hunting Jim!
If they catch him, he'll be killed!
I know, and he's not the only one.
Because of us, Arthur's now fated
to eat the big one, too!
Eat the what?
Oh, no, was I supposed to bring food?
-He'll be eating a death sandwich, Steve.
-Ugh, who would eat that? Gross.
[groans] Look.
If Arthur dies, we lose
the Battle of Killahead
and the war.
Which will probably mess up time so much,
you'll never be able to return home.
Oh, no! Toby!
-What's happening to him?
-The future-- our future is vanishing!
-What's that?
-Well-- Well, that wasn't there before.
It's a new timeline,
one where Arthur and Jim live.
And Morgana's the hero?
I thought she was destined
to become Mistress Doom.
It looks like there's a possibility,
if we get Arthur and Morgana to reconcile,
then, somehow, nobody dies.
[Galahad] Squire Steve!
-[horse neighs]
-[Galahad] We are all thirsty!
I'll keep an eye on Morgana.
Douxie, you work on Arthur.
And, Steve, make sure
they don't kill my boyfriend.
Okay, Arch, let's save history-- Whoa!
[Merlin] Oh, no, you don't, boy.
[Douxie] But, Master Merlin, I can help!
I'm 900 years smarter, tougher--
Nine hundred years crazier, clearly.
I must focus on protecting
the king's life.
So I'm taking an apprentice
who won't mess up the fabric of time.
L-Let's do this, Master!
Him? But he's just a moppet
with a man bun!
Someone's just jealous
they don't get to ride on the horse.
-[horse farts]
-Oh!
[fanfare plays]
It's time we root out
every last enemy in our lands.
-[knight] Hyah!
-[horse neighs]
[grunts, groans]
[exhales]
-[Arthur] Death to all Trolls!
-[knights] Death to all Trolls!
Let's get out there, boys,
and rip their faces off!
-Medieval Bessie, go!
-[bell clanging]
-Ho-ho! Cow-ho!
-[moos]
What a beautiful day for a ride.
It just makes you want to--
Huh?
[snoring] Yes, Mummy, it tickles.
You do know that repeat sleep spells
can cause memory loss permanently.
Huh, don't remember that. No matter.
[grunts]
-Let's go! The king needs us!
-[horse neighs]
[panting, groaning]
[sizzling]
Aah!
[coughs, pants]
Whoa.
[Callista] Yes! We made it to the border!
[birds calling]
That's Killahead.
Yeah, yeah.
Big, scary name for a puny, little bridge.
River's been dry for years.
At this point, it's a bridge over nothing.
My friends were supposed
to find us by now.
Something must have happened.
You guys need to get to safety.
[groaning]
Whoa, take it easy.
-You're still in rough shape.
-[winces]
I'll be all right.
You should go on ahead, too.
And leave you here to die
and haunt my night dreams? No, thanks.
I don't get why you trust
those humans.
You'll see. We're not all bad.
-You just gotta give us a chance.
-[fanfare plays]
-[men shouting]
-Ugh, a chance to what?
See? Those humans are coming
to turn your head into a wall decoration.
Everybody, hide!
-[distant shouting]
-[Jim panting]
[knight] Tally-ho!
[horse neighs, sputters]
[whimpers]
[whimpers]
-[fart squeaks]
-Oh!
We can't let them find the others.
They'll lead them
straight to our village.
No-good fleshbags.
-We gotta distract them.
-Oh, you're right.
Aah! Oh, he-hello!
[growls]
-Get them!
-[horse neighs]
I can't believe you pushed me!
[Arthur] Faster, men! Faster!
Come on!
We'll lose them in the Wild Wood!
[knight] Yes! Now they're going this way!
-[Steve] Medieval steed, ho!
-[cow moos]
At-- At your leisure.
[Douxie] Merlin, you have to look
at the Time Map!
-We found--
-You!
You defy my command
when the king's life is in jeopardy?
Need I remind you that we trespass
in Gunmar's territory?
But, Master, I found a new line of fate!
We can save everyone
if we get Arthur and Morgana--
-Whoa! Whoa! Oh!
-[neighs]
-[knights murmuring]
-[horse neighs]
Come on. Now's our chance.
They've entered the Wild Wood.
Abandon the horses.
We head on foot!
-[horse nickers]
-Changing fate is never that simple.
I'll deal with you later.
What's most important
is that I keep Arthur safe from harm.
Okay, good chat, sir!
Forget him. Stick to the plan.
-I'll take the king.
-I'll cover Morgana.
And let's just focus on getting
these royal siblings to hug and make up.
-[Claire] And not die.
-[Archie] Uh, yes, that, too.
[creature shrieks]
[clears throat]
Eh, enjoying the hunt, milord?
[sighs] You again, boy?
No. I'll feel better
after dealing with my sister.
Wouldn't you say life's too short
to hold grudges?
[growls]
[chuckles] I mean
family's so important, isn't it?
You're lucky that you've got one.
Closest I ever got was him.
[coughs]
-Hmm.
-[Douxie] Please, sire.
Morgana was only looking out
for those poor creatures.
Is all this really worth hurting her?
-I will speak of this no more!
-[sighs]
[knight] Keep an eye out.
-Ugh, my brother has eyes everywhere.
-He's just looking out for you.
Can you blame him?
He's already accused me of betrayal.
I lost my brother once.
You don't appreciate them
till they're gone.
-Maybe if you just talked?
-Pfft, look where that last talk got us.
Please, of everyone here,
you're the only one I can trust.
Me? What made him stop trusting you?
It's a long story.
Come on.
[knight] No sign of them, sire.
Trail's gone cold.
[owl hoots]
Mm, not much love left between them.
If only you could make him remember
the good old days.
-[meows]
-Maybe I can.
Say, my liege, didn't you used
to spend time in this wood?
Yes.
As a boy.
Much time was lost
in this accursed forest.
I often fled to these woods to escape
from my growing responsibilities.
-[whirs]
-[gasps]
[knight 1] On your guard, men!
We've been bewitched!
[knight 2] What's happening?
-It's coming for me!
-[disembodied laughter echoing]
[knight 2] It's dark magic!
[scoffs] Stand down.
We're not in danger.
Uh, my lord
[Arthur] Gwen.
-[exhales] My betrothed.
-[children laughing]
My beloved.
She was the heart of me.
Mm, we loved these woods.
The freedom they offered.
The wood showed us kindness
for our courage.
Gwen and I were never scared.
Arthur, however
I knew what danger lurked in the darkness.
Gwen!
Away from her, demon!
[Arthur] As we grew older
and duty kept me inside,
Morgana encouraged Gwen,
brought her out when she should have
stayed safe within Camelot.
Arthur always blamed me
for our moonlight trips.
But that night, it was Gwen
pulling me out of the door.
We'd stumbled into a Stalkling nest.
Gwen!
-[snarling]
-[Morgana] It was afraid.
-[yelps]
-[roars]
[screams]
That night, Gwen went into the woods
and never returned.
[sighs] You, sister,
should have known better.
You never forgave me.
And when my own gifts blossomed,
you saw yet another abomination.
Ordered Merlin to teach me
to control that part of me
though Gwen loved magic as I did.
Yes. Yes, she did.
[Arthur gasps]
[Arthur] I
I miss her terribly.
As do I
brother.
It's working!
Troll! We found one!
[growls] I will lose no one else
to those creatures.
To arms!
No, no, no, no, no! Not now!
Oh, no! Jim!
Steady, men! Remember your training.
-Kill the beast!
-Wait, kill?
I thought this was catch-and-release!
Using magic? On the king?
Are you mad?
Come, we must protect Arthur.
[knights murmuring]
[knights murmuring]
[Troll growling]
[Troll grunts]
-[roaring]
-[shouts]
Take the beast down!
Arthur, no!
[Troll grunts]
-Squire Steve, will you do the honors?
-[whimpers]
-[roars]
-[yelps]
-[shouts]
-[grunts]
Careful, young squire.
Show these beasts no sympathy.
-[shouts]
-[groans]
[hissing]
[all] Huzzah! Huzzah!
-[whimpering]
-[snarling]
[screams]
[roars]
-Bular the Butcher!
-The Gumm-Gumm prince himself!
[all grunting]
[laughing] Oh
[Galahad] Come on,
let's see what you're-- [shouts]
[Bular shouting]
For Camelot!
I'll drink your blood
out of a goblet made of your skull!
[Bular shouting]
[Arthur groaning]
I'll carve you open,
let your guts spill out!
-My king!
-Arthur!
-[Arthur grunts]
-[Bular] Huh?
[grunting] There's no spilling
anything today!
[shouting, grunts]
[strains] Finish it, then, fleshbag!
[Arthur] The spawn of Gunmar.
-I won't dull Excalibur's edge with you.
-[thuds]
-[Bular grunts]
-Drag this monster back to Camelot!
I have plans for him.
The rest, with me!
My blade hungers.
[Lancelot] As you wish, milord. Onward!
Who's the monster here?
[caws]
Huh, these tracks are fresh!
The other beasts can't be far, milord.
-Best we spread out, flank them!
-Go.
And, you, time to pick a side.
You would do well not to return
with a clean sword.
We gotta slow these fleshbags down,
or we'll end up statues in Arthur's hall.
[panting]
Try and keep up!
We're taking a detour.
Hold!
[creature chitter]
-What are those?
-[clunks]
-Ah!
-Oh.
You know Trolls--
we like to protect our homes.
-[chuckles]
-[sighs]
Those fleshbags would have to be stupid
to follow us now.
You don't know Steve.
[chuckles]
This area is dangerous,
but there's no way around.
[clears throat] Fear not,
for Steve will scout the enemy base.
Hold, Squire. Watch out for the--
-Ha ha!
-[clunks]
-Ow! [whimpering]
-[Galahad] Oh!
-Ow!
-[knights] Oh!
[Steve screaming]
-[laughing]
-[screaming continues]
[groans]
-[Galahad] That one's gotta hurt!
-Well done, Squire Steve!
-Now the path's clear.
-[slurring] I love you guys.
You guys are my best friends.
-[knight shouts]
-Lousy smoothskins just keep coming.
So, how'd you know about the traps?
'Cause
I used to live here.
[bird squawking]
[Callista] This is Tombro, my home.
Or what's left of it.
It's, uh nice.
It was.
You know, "great" King Arthur,
always expanding his borders.
I was just a youngling
when the knights sacked the village,
caught me, gave me
my human name: Callista.
Never knew my Troll name,
my real one.
You know, usual story.
Callista, I'm so sorry.
There'll be time to lick our wounds
when those pinkbellies aren't hunting us.
You know, where I'm from,
humans and Trolls get along.
[laughs] And where's that again?
Prepare to have your mind blown.
Look! People and Trolls, working together.
-They don't have to fight.
-Oh! Who's the one with the baby hands?
Must be the runt of the litter.
He was tall for his age!
But you see? They're not all bad.
Shh, I've got one in my sights.
This one's sort of sweet.
Uh, oh, no, what do I do, what do I do?
Such conflict.
Oh, snap! Uh mosquito!
-[Callista grunts]
-Clumsy jackanape!
-Callista!
-[grunts] Run, now!
-[Steve] Oh, no! Another mosquito!
-Aah!
[panting]
[groans]
[panting, groaning]
Let's go! Hurry it up!
Jim?
-Jim!
-[groaning]
Callista!
Where are you?
-[panting]
-[Claire] Jim!
-Jim!
-[Troll snarls]
-[grunts]
-What if we let this one go?
You never let them go!
Rally, men!
Whoever gets that Troll gets a fiefdom!
-Huzzah!
-[knights] Huzzah!
Uh
-Wait!
-My king, it's not safe!
-Oh, no.
-Come, handmaiden.
Not a moment to lose.
What are you gonna do if we catch them?
Whatever I have to.
[gasps] Jim!
[panting]
Aah! [grunting]
[coughing]
-[shouts] There you are.
-[panting] Morgana?
Jim! Jim!
[Jim panting]
-[shouts]
-[Morgana] Don't be afraid.
I won't hurt you.
[Claire] Jim!
Don't kill him! You said--
-[groans, gasps]
-I'm sorry you were ever in a cage.
-[moans]
-[sighs]
-[gasps]
-Down in the clearing!
Go. I will draw away the others.
-Go!
-I'll find you.
[groans]
Oof! [gasps]
-Arthur!
-Jim!
So, sister.
Your true loyalties
stand revealed at last.
I warned you not to return
with a clean sword.
No!
What? What are you doing?
-What I should have done years ago.
-You dare raise arms against your king?
[both grunting]
-Run, Jim!
-[groans]
Get back here, you gravel-eater!
No!
What the? She's a wit-- Oh!
Oh-ho, man!
That Troll-- that came out of nowhere!
-Right, guys?
-[groans]
-Ooh!
-[nervous chuckle]
Go!
-[shouting]
-I knew it was you!
You defied me, freed those monsters,
and now attack your own blood?
What possesses you?
Clarity of mind, brother. [shouts]
Morgana?
She takes Arthur's life.
No, no! No, wait, wait!
We don't have to figh-- Oh!
[grunting]
Defend the king at all costs!
[grunts] You, too, old man?
I do what I must for the greater good!
Traitors!
You throw us in chains,
fearing what you cannot control,
but we of magic are not lesser creatures,
we are more!
-[grunts]
-[all shout]
Stop! We found another way!
[Douxie] We can do this peacefully!
The time for peace ended long ago.
[Claire] Morgana, he's not the enemy.
I trusted you!
Now you side with my brother
over your own kind?
You're just one of them.
You're all against me,
but I am more powerful than you know.
Ortum obumbratio!
[all shout]
[gasps]
[shadow shrieks, chuckles]
-Oh, buckets.
-[shadows shriek]
-[both whimpering]
-[Steve shrieks]
[Morgana cackles]
[Callista groaning]
At least little Jim got away.
[knight] There's another one!
Trying to get away, beastie?
[Jim shouts]
[both shout]
Ugh, why aren't you running, you idiot?
Now we're both gonna die.
I told you before,
no one gets left behind.
[groans] Oh, hey, feelings.
-[shadows shrieking]
-[Morgana cackling]
[all grunting]
Oh, no way!
Can't get me! Ha ha! [chokes]
-Yah!
-[grunting, screams]
Your cruelty towards magic-kind
knows no bounds!
You have taken and taken,
and now we take back!
Protect the king!
[both grunting]
[roars]
[shouts]
[grunts]
[all grunting]
[cackling]
[Steve screaming]
[roars]
Enough!
[all shout]
[grunting]
[shouts]
You outlaw magic,
but fight with an enchanted sword!
You snuff out any power that isn't yours,
but I won't go so quietly.
I denied your true nature for so long
because you are my sister.
But when I look at you now,
all I see is a demon!
A witch!
[panting]
And all I see is a little boy driven mad
by hatred and prejudice!
-Goodbye, brother.
-[groans]
Morgana!
No! No, no, no!
[Morgana shrieks]
[whimpering]
No
Brother?
[gasps, screaming]
-Morgana!
-No!
No!
[shouts]
[Arthur screaming]
[crows caw]
[chains rattling]
Now magic has truly taken
everything from me.
She's gone. We failed.
No, I failed.
Master, I-- I'm so sorry.
This is why you don't meddle with time.
But I tried. I tried to fix it.
Don't you see, boy?
There is no "fixing" anything.
Every change has consequence.
Knowing the future is a responsibility
to bear with caution,
lest you cause worse things to happen.
Morgana's dead, Excalibur's broken.
That never happened.
We are in uncharted territory.
[both panting]
Almost there.
[both groan]
[both panting]
[groans] Thanks.
You didn't leave me to die, Jim.
[chuckles]
-[both grunt]
-You're in bad shape.
Aah! And, so am I, actually.
Help!
Can somebody help us, please?
[groans]
Blinky?
Blinky?
It's Blinkous Galadrigal to you,
youngling!
[theme music playing]