Bent (2012) s01e04 Episode Script
A-Game
1 All right, I feel like I should be wearing safety goggles if I'm going to be doing this.
All right, safety meeting.
Gary doesn't feel safe.
He wants goggles.
- "Goggles" wants goggles.
- That's what "Goggles" said.
I really don't want to be called "Goggles.
" You can't veto your own nickname.
How about backfat? I don't even have backfat.
Goggles doesn't have backfat.
Backfat it is.
Winner, winner, chicken dinner.
Right.
Pete, can I talk to you privately for a minute? What? I can't hear you.
I need to speak to you alone, it's kind of a delicate matter.
All right.
Guys, hold the work, hold the work! Alex needs to say something.
Okay, okay.
This is kind of awkward, but, um You know how Ben gave me that really pretty necklace? Yeah, for the love of God, we know about the necklace.
Well I was going to wear it this weekend, and this is definitely in no way an accusation, but it's it's missing.
Sounds like an accusation.
You think we jacked your necklace? I was just wondering if any of you guys had seen it.
Maybe in our getaway van? This is some racist crap.
All right, a lot of us are white, so it's kind of confusing.
Damn it, backfat, get indignant.
Okay, guys? Forget I said anything.
No, you can't un-ring that bell.
All right boys, let's bring it in.
Confession time, I took the necklace.
You've got a curious problem.
- It's broken.
- Yeah, and I broke it.
- Alex.
- Oh! Ah I snuck in like an Indian.
I'm not sure if you're allowed to say that.
I just did.
Exciting weekend coming up, huh? Big partner wedding.
Mm-hm.
Number three for Anthony.
I did some of my best pre-nup work on this one.
If they split up, he gets to keep her boob job.
It was, uh, so generous of you to have it at your house.
It's a huge write-off.
How's my little caterer? She's all ready for you.
Thank you again for recommending your sister.
I actually thought it was a bad idea.
Tell her to scratch the tuna cones.
- Not the go-between.
- Alex May I speak to you candidly? Sure.
I want this wedding to go well for you.
For me? It's not It's not my big day.
In a way, it is.
You had such a rough time last year.
Yeah, it was It had its moments.
Yeah, well, with Derek's embezzlement, and the divorce, and the drunken holiday party debacle.
Hey, that was food poisoning.
Food poisoning? Very good.
No, shellfish.
I'm allergic to shellfish.
Look, I just want you to show everyone this weekend that your life is back on track.
You still want to be partner, right? Absolutely, yes.
Good.
Who you bringing? My boyfriend, Ben.
Aw, is your boyfriend, Ben, bringing his a-game? You're going to love him.
It's not just me, he has to pass the smell test with the partners' wives.
Julia, and my little Anna.
Sometimes they get a little Anyhoo, I'm out.
Hup! So you're sure you're not going to be on call this weekend for the wedding? Bringing my a-game.
Ah, God, it's 7:00 A.
M.
, I'm late for surgery.
What have you got? - Triple bypass.
- Nervous? I play God every day, babe.
Cocky's not sexy, Ben.
You know, unless it's got a blue-collar spin.
Well look who's on time.
Is the ocean closed? Don't love him staying over.
Sends a weird message.
Charlie's at Screwsie's.
Yes, it's got to be super-confusing for the kid.
You're blocking me in.
The driveway's for commercial vehicles only.
Okay, first time's a warning, second time we fill your car with concrete.
So, yeah, things get out of control real quick.
Okay, let's move it, handyman.
I got surgery.
Is it me, or does he always have "surgery"? Back to your corners, boys.
Can't get me down, Petey.
I'm in the afterglow.
That was creepy.
Wow, five weeks, he's buying you jewelry, and you're taking him to a wedding.
Zero to 60.
Vrooom! Gary will get that.
Don't try to get in my head.
Oh, I'm already there.
Just making a couple of pop-tarts in your mind kitchen.
Mm, is that supposed to be smack talk? Ding! Oh, they're done.
Can smell the brain cinnamon.
Got a surgery to get to.
Nobody cares, Ben.
Come on, no hey Hey, Terry, you gave Steve my thursday night shift.
That's That's my big tip night.
I've asked you not to put your tip jar out.
I know, I know.
"Wink, wink, corporate policy, no tips.
" It is corporate policy.
All right, come on, Terry.
I'll cut you in for a "finsky.
" I gave Steve thursday night because he needs the work.
His wife has epstein-barr.
Whatever that is.
It's a real thing.
She's super-tired.
This is going to affect my working attitude.
I'll alert the employee- of-the-month committee.
Come on, Terry, be a guy.
- I am a guy.
- Ter ter You know, that's just rude.
What's her necklace status? My cousin the jeweler who's crazy-fast Is crazy-closed.
Okay, plan "B," Gary sneaks up and puts it in her room.
What? Good call.
If he gets caught, we can take the hit.
He's expendable.
Okay, I don't find this funny.
We're just messing with you.
No, there's actually a hint of truth in all this.
You guys haven't truly accepted me as a part of the crew.
Here come the orange tears.
And I know all about the "secret steak night.
" What, were you just Seriously weren't going to invite me, or Do you really want to come if you have to beg for an invite? Yes.
Vote on Gary coming to "secret steak night.
" - Aye.
- Nay.
Got to be unanimous.
Revote.
- Nay.
- Aye.
- Revote, aye.
- Nay.
Why do I want to be in this club? Want a refill? I never got any.
Hmm.
What's in this? Rum.
I kind of like it.
One day, I'll let you try my brownies.
Hey.
Dinner's in ten minutes.
I filled up on rum cake.
Did you? Thanks for babysitting.
Cheesecake.
What's up, girl? You talking to Charlie? Yeah.
Yeah, what's going on, Charlie? Just eating desserts.
Mm, dynamite.
That's a weird place to rest, Gary.
Yeah, it's really heavy.
Let me get the door.
Oh, hi.
Hey, son.
Um, listen, this is a little embarrassing, but, uh, I'm a little short on scratch.
I need a little "walking around" money.
Traditionally, the father gives the son allowance.
Yeah.
Terry totally screwed me on my cherry shift.
- You lost thursdays? - Yeah.
Hey, Screwsie's looking for catering help.
Bartender or waiter? I don't know.
Do you have to wear a bow-tie? Really don't have the details.
Because they're demeaning.
They're like a Scarlet "U" for unemployed actors.
Okay.
Okay, I'm in.
But I'm not going to wear a bow-tie.
I have neither the authority to hire you, nor the interest in continuing this conversation.
The the bow-tieâs a deal breaker for me.
Lady valets.
Don't mind if I do.
Do you what, exactly? I don't know, give them my car.
So, uh, you ready for my a-game? Huh? 'Cause I am about to blow Bob's mind.
I gotta go.
What? I'm sorry.
I have surgery.
Are you kidding? You're going to go right now? Well, you know, it's a heart transplant.
There's not a lot of wiggle room.
I am so sorry.
Sorry! Can't someone else do it?! Good evening.
- Alex? - Oh, Julia! - Anna, how are you? - Good.
I heard you're in venice now.
Yes, I love it.
Ah.
Bob and I went to dinner down there.
It is such a scene.
All those characters, people partying, all those jugglers.
Yes, we have a huge Jester problem.
So where is this surgeon Lyle's been telling me all about, hmm? You know, he had a last-minute heart transplant Ohh.
It happens all the time.
He gets Paged, and it's real Well, then we should move you to the singles table.
I'm not single.
Oh, and my cousin mark is there.
He just started his fifth year at UCSB.
Good for him.
- Yeah.
- Great.
I'll make it happen.
Fantastic.
F.
Y.
I.
, the surgery story's plain bogus.
Yeah, I'm going to get some wine.
I'll join you.
- Walt.
- Yeah? Tie your bow-tie.
And where did you put those crab cakes I told you to bring? - Oh.
- Tell me you did not forget them at your house.
No, princess, they're in my car.
Just give me five minutes.
Hey, uh, Pete, can you do me a favor? Nobody told me to wear a jacket.
It's steak night, Gary.
Common sense.
All right, I'm going to run these crab cakes in to my dad, and then I was peckish.
Hey, could you say hi to Screwsie, if you see her? Why don't you tell her yourself? 'Cause it might get kind of weird.
Or bold.
Have some confidence, backfat.
I don't know why I'm so insecure.
Whew.
Backfat need a backbone.
All right, you've got this.
Yeah, I do.
Was that Gary? Almost.
Oh, I owe you for this.
- Feels light.
- Yeah, clem took his cut.
Oh, well, since the seal has been broken.
Mm.
Mmm! What are you working on? Crab cakes.
Get in on this.
This is my son, Pete.
- Master Pete.
- This is Gerald.
Gerald and I did the odd couple in Toluca Lake.
- Oh.
- Incoming.
Oop.
How long have you had these? Feels light.
Um, felt good to me.
- Hi, Pete.
- Hey.
Tie your bow-tie.
Absolutely.
What are you doing here? Just dropping off some appetizers.
Whoa, safety meeting.
You are on fire.
Thank you.
And your legs look That's enough.
So Ben's got "surgery"? Yeah, it's a little weird, you just showing up here, don't you think? You think I'm crashing the wedding to be with you? I don't know You usually wear a jacket when you deliver appetizers? - It's secret steak night.
- Why is it secret? I'm not at liberty to say.
I think you should go.
Yeah, I'm gonna go.
The guys are in the truck, waiting for me.
Enjoy my taillights.
- I will not.
- Well, is this the famous Ben? Oh, no, no, no.
- This is Pete, he was just - How you doing? You show up to a black tie event in that? Are you high? Probably not still.
Ooh, are you busting balls? Is he busting balls? I don't know.
I love it.
We're doing shots.
- Come on.
- Great.
We're doing shots.
But I was supposed to go, now you want me to stay? Yes.
I can't what? I can't hear you.
Please.
I'm really confused, just tell me that you want me to be your hero.
Please, Pete, be my hero.
How do you know this clown? - Well - I'm her contractor.
I wish I was handy.
My second wife's brother was super-handy.
Losing him was the worst part of the divorce.
That was probably pretty rough on the kids too.
They bounce.
Except for Jason.
He's puh.
He couldn't make it tonight.
He's in cabo with mommy.
Oh, I love cabo.
It's the best.
And you know paseo's? Oh, incredible fish tacos.
Google it.
Surf shack.
You surf too? Only when he's supposed to be at work.
That's it, done.
We're switching jackets and I'm leaving here as you.
Give me some hair! That man has a serious crush on me.
Yeah, you could be the next Anna.
Well, uh, my work here is done.
You wanna just leave the money on the nightstand, or Buy you dinner, if it'd make you feel less cheap.
I got nowhere else to be.
I'm beyond peckish right now.
How long has it been? About a quarter of a tank.
Shouldn't we turn this off? I need my booty heat.
My back runs cold.
Okay, this is ridiculous.
I'm starving.
You're starting to look like A blond t-bone to me right now.
Dibs on his backfat.
The backfat is the sweetest part of a Gary.
What he's doing in there? Maybe he's trying to leave, but he can't.
He's not trapped, it's a wedding, not a well.
- You never been married? - Mm-mmm.
You ever have steak tartare? You ever have that? Well, you know who I wouldn't want to be? Harrison Ford.
Oh, he is so typecast.
He's totally pigeon-holed.
He can only play the lead.
- Handcuffed.
- Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Who's that? Ooh, pretty dress.
Whole thing's about two seasons behind, though.
Yes, she's not from L.
A.
- No.
- Boston.
- Yeah.
- Maybe Cincinnati.
Could be yeah.
Definitely an out-of-towner though, right? Perfect.
She'll be going to the airport right after the farewell brunch.
While still smelling of my musk.
Dibs.
Bastard.
I'm not bussing your tables.
- Okay.
- I'm telling you that now.
Okay.
Chug! Chug! Chug! Chug! Chug! Chug! Suck it, Riggins! I have a bruised rib, so It's hard for you to wear a bra? Uh Bros? You in, or are you out? Absolutely not.
Uh, no, this is a work event for us, so I get it, ma'am.
Ma'am? Pete, table eight wants to meet you.
Oh, and I'd love to meet them, Chuck, but I need a second here.
Good God, I'm blowin' up.
I got beer all over my shoe.
You spilled? I call D.
Q.
On chug contest.
First, she says her boyfriend has surgery.
Then ten minutes later she's with that ridiculous contractor.
Well, he was kind of hot.
Mark said she was chugging beer? It's like the holiday party all over again.
And she wants to be partner? She's a mess.
Ah, wow, what they say? Said"Kind of hot.
" That's good.
Are you okay? Come with me.
What are you doing? Trust me.
I simply don't.
Come on.
Excuse me, dude.
We're going to tear this place up.
Oh, really? So are you team bride, or groom? Ah, the bride's my sister.
Oh, your little sister's getting married.
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
Feeling the heat? Uh, it's a little rough.
Yeah, it is.
- You local? - I'm actually down from Oregon.
Are you now? Walt! Are you kidding me? To be continued.
Okay.
These arms of mine Kind of like dancing on air.
Not at all.
All right, come with me.
Where what What are you doing? You didn't have that calamari, did you? No, what calamari? That's what did you in at the holiday party last year, when you got that awful food poisoning, which was confirmed by those two separate doctors.
Yes, and everyone thought I was hammered.
- They're not listening.
- They don't care.
You know, this would be a lot sexier if you just let me lead.
You're a terrible dancer.
- I'm going to dip you.
- Oh, no, don't.
- I'm going to dip you hard.
- Please don't.
Uhh! Yeah, they're not looking.
Stay in it, back straight.
Shoulders.
Abort, I've got nothing but blood and beer in my head.
- Ooh.
- Oh.
I got a, uh I gotta take care of something.
Bob, can I cut in, please? Hi, Anna.
I heard what you said, a little while ago.
What are you talking about? Since you seem to be deciding factor on who makes partner, let me just throw some numbers at you.
Last year I billed 2,200 hours, brought in six new clients, and got exactly one standing offer from hirsch and hanson to be, guess what, a partner.
Think about it.
You too, Bob.
Enjoy my headlights.
Taillights.
Taillights.
I hope she doesn't puke like last year.
You know, that veered from my original plan.
You're such a terrible dancer, I had to improvise.
- I've got this rib injury.
- Really? It just hurts to move laterally.
- It's like - Yeah, mm-hmm.
Thanks for hanging around.
You kind of went ape out there.
My God, what was I thinking? It's not funny.
It's going to bite me in the ass on monday.
Sometimes, when you're inappropriate in a workplace setting, they end up respecting you more, for being honest.
They don't.
Really? They do.
And, you know, Alex I want to be honest with you right now.
Okay.
Gary took your necklace.
And he broke it.
I'd appreciate it if, you know, I could handle this internally.
He's, uh He's not a bad kid.
Just to be clear, any ground you gained tonight you just lost.
- So, we're at zero again.
- Pretty much.
- I can live with that.
- Okay.
Where are we next week? You're unbelievably fired.
Oh.
Well, I'd turn in my bow-tie, but I flushed it.
Bob invited me to his house in Telluride.
Good.
You're going to make partner before I do.
How many years of High School do you need for that? Wow, anybody going by the marina del rey day's inn? - Out of towner? - The bride's sister.
Rachel? She's crazy.
That's Portland's problem.
I'm out.
I'm on it.
Hey, mark.
Hey, two glasses of champagne, please.
Actually, can I get the bottle? Expecting a big night? Always.
Thank you, sir.
You made it.
make a wish, baby - how'd the surgery go? - He died.
But, in the helicopter, so it's all good, you know, liability-wise.
- Still, it's a it's a loss.
- Yeah.
Is there any food left? - Yeah.
- Okay.
Let my love rain down on you we could wash away the past leaving so early? Well, my date's date showed up.
Bummer.
It's all good.
I'm in her head now.
Oh, we're starving! Okay, boys, late-night steak night.
Gary, remind me to give you a heads-up about some potential monday morning weirdness.
Come on, come on.
Let's go, let's go.
Uh-oh.
Out of gas.
Clem You know I love my booty heat.
Hey, Terry, do you have a second? - Um - I'd like you to meet my raison d'etre.
I'm Eloise.
Oh, that's a great name, that I gave you.
I didn't know you had a granddaughter.
A daughter, actually.
My my marriage ended, and, uh, well, now it's just the two of us.
What's going on here, Walt? Terry, I am coming to you today with my hat in my hand.
I'm not too proud You have one son, Pete.
He's like 6'4".
Yes, Eloise's half-brother.
- I don't believe you.
- No, this This is my daughter, Eloise, and we're We're very poor.
Is this some weird acting exercise? No, this is my daughter, - Eloise.
- Walt Clearly, I've taken the wrong approach here.
You need to get out.
I would like my thursday night shift back.
- Now.
- Fair enough.
Um, just for me, as a note, where did I lose you? - Daughter.
- Seriously.
- I do.
- It's over.
Okay, here we go.
Thanks for your time.
All right, safety meeting.
Gary doesn't feel safe.
He wants goggles.
- "Goggles" wants goggles.
- That's what "Goggles" said.
I really don't want to be called "Goggles.
" You can't veto your own nickname.
How about backfat? I don't even have backfat.
Goggles doesn't have backfat.
Backfat it is.
Winner, winner, chicken dinner.
Right.
Pete, can I talk to you privately for a minute? What? I can't hear you.
I need to speak to you alone, it's kind of a delicate matter.
All right.
Guys, hold the work, hold the work! Alex needs to say something.
Okay, okay.
This is kind of awkward, but, um You know how Ben gave me that really pretty necklace? Yeah, for the love of God, we know about the necklace.
Well I was going to wear it this weekend, and this is definitely in no way an accusation, but it's it's missing.
Sounds like an accusation.
You think we jacked your necklace? I was just wondering if any of you guys had seen it.
Maybe in our getaway van? This is some racist crap.
All right, a lot of us are white, so it's kind of confusing.
Damn it, backfat, get indignant.
Okay, guys? Forget I said anything.
No, you can't un-ring that bell.
All right boys, let's bring it in.
Confession time, I took the necklace.
You've got a curious problem.
- It's broken.
- Yeah, and I broke it.
- Alex.
- Oh! Ah I snuck in like an Indian.
I'm not sure if you're allowed to say that.
I just did.
Exciting weekend coming up, huh? Big partner wedding.
Mm-hm.
Number three for Anthony.
I did some of my best pre-nup work on this one.
If they split up, he gets to keep her boob job.
It was, uh, so generous of you to have it at your house.
It's a huge write-off.
How's my little caterer? She's all ready for you.
Thank you again for recommending your sister.
I actually thought it was a bad idea.
Tell her to scratch the tuna cones.
- Not the go-between.
- Alex May I speak to you candidly? Sure.
I want this wedding to go well for you.
For me? It's not It's not my big day.
In a way, it is.
You had such a rough time last year.
Yeah, it was It had its moments.
Yeah, well, with Derek's embezzlement, and the divorce, and the drunken holiday party debacle.
Hey, that was food poisoning.
Food poisoning? Very good.
No, shellfish.
I'm allergic to shellfish.
Look, I just want you to show everyone this weekend that your life is back on track.
You still want to be partner, right? Absolutely, yes.
Good.
Who you bringing? My boyfriend, Ben.
Aw, is your boyfriend, Ben, bringing his a-game? You're going to love him.
It's not just me, he has to pass the smell test with the partners' wives.
Julia, and my little Anna.
Sometimes they get a little Anyhoo, I'm out.
Hup! So you're sure you're not going to be on call this weekend for the wedding? Bringing my a-game.
Ah, God, it's 7:00 A.
M.
, I'm late for surgery.
What have you got? - Triple bypass.
- Nervous? I play God every day, babe.
Cocky's not sexy, Ben.
You know, unless it's got a blue-collar spin.
Well look who's on time.
Is the ocean closed? Don't love him staying over.
Sends a weird message.
Charlie's at Screwsie's.
Yes, it's got to be super-confusing for the kid.
You're blocking me in.
The driveway's for commercial vehicles only.
Okay, first time's a warning, second time we fill your car with concrete.
So, yeah, things get out of control real quick.
Okay, let's move it, handyman.
I got surgery.
Is it me, or does he always have "surgery"? Back to your corners, boys.
Can't get me down, Petey.
I'm in the afterglow.
That was creepy.
Wow, five weeks, he's buying you jewelry, and you're taking him to a wedding.
Zero to 60.
Vrooom! Gary will get that.
Don't try to get in my head.
Oh, I'm already there.
Just making a couple of pop-tarts in your mind kitchen.
Mm, is that supposed to be smack talk? Ding! Oh, they're done.
Can smell the brain cinnamon.
Got a surgery to get to.
Nobody cares, Ben.
Come on, no hey Hey, Terry, you gave Steve my thursday night shift.
That's That's my big tip night.
I've asked you not to put your tip jar out.
I know, I know.
"Wink, wink, corporate policy, no tips.
" It is corporate policy.
All right, come on, Terry.
I'll cut you in for a "finsky.
" I gave Steve thursday night because he needs the work.
His wife has epstein-barr.
Whatever that is.
It's a real thing.
She's super-tired.
This is going to affect my working attitude.
I'll alert the employee- of-the-month committee.
Come on, Terry, be a guy.
- I am a guy.
- Ter ter You know, that's just rude.
What's her necklace status? My cousin the jeweler who's crazy-fast Is crazy-closed.
Okay, plan "B," Gary sneaks up and puts it in her room.
What? Good call.
If he gets caught, we can take the hit.
He's expendable.
Okay, I don't find this funny.
We're just messing with you.
No, there's actually a hint of truth in all this.
You guys haven't truly accepted me as a part of the crew.
Here come the orange tears.
And I know all about the "secret steak night.
" What, were you just Seriously weren't going to invite me, or Do you really want to come if you have to beg for an invite? Yes.
Vote on Gary coming to "secret steak night.
" - Aye.
- Nay.
Got to be unanimous.
Revote.
- Nay.
- Aye.
- Revote, aye.
- Nay.
Why do I want to be in this club? Want a refill? I never got any.
Hmm.
What's in this? Rum.
I kind of like it.
One day, I'll let you try my brownies.
Hey.
Dinner's in ten minutes.
I filled up on rum cake.
Did you? Thanks for babysitting.
Cheesecake.
What's up, girl? You talking to Charlie? Yeah.
Yeah, what's going on, Charlie? Just eating desserts.
Mm, dynamite.
That's a weird place to rest, Gary.
Yeah, it's really heavy.
Let me get the door.
Oh, hi.
Hey, son.
Um, listen, this is a little embarrassing, but, uh, I'm a little short on scratch.
I need a little "walking around" money.
Traditionally, the father gives the son allowance.
Yeah.
Terry totally screwed me on my cherry shift.
- You lost thursdays? - Yeah.
Hey, Screwsie's looking for catering help.
Bartender or waiter? I don't know.
Do you have to wear a bow-tie? Really don't have the details.
Because they're demeaning.
They're like a Scarlet "U" for unemployed actors.
Okay.
Okay, I'm in.
But I'm not going to wear a bow-tie.
I have neither the authority to hire you, nor the interest in continuing this conversation.
The the bow-tieâs a deal breaker for me.
Lady valets.
Don't mind if I do.
Do you what, exactly? I don't know, give them my car.
So, uh, you ready for my a-game? Huh? 'Cause I am about to blow Bob's mind.
I gotta go.
What? I'm sorry.
I have surgery.
Are you kidding? You're going to go right now? Well, you know, it's a heart transplant.
There's not a lot of wiggle room.
I am so sorry.
Sorry! Can't someone else do it?! Good evening.
- Alex? - Oh, Julia! - Anna, how are you? - Good.
I heard you're in venice now.
Yes, I love it.
Ah.
Bob and I went to dinner down there.
It is such a scene.
All those characters, people partying, all those jugglers.
Yes, we have a huge Jester problem.
So where is this surgeon Lyle's been telling me all about, hmm? You know, he had a last-minute heart transplant Ohh.
It happens all the time.
He gets Paged, and it's real Well, then we should move you to the singles table.
I'm not single.
Oh, and my cousin mark is there.
He just started his fifth year at UCSB.
Good for him.
- Yeah.
- Great.
I'll make it happen.
Fantastic.
F.
Y.
I.
, the surgery story's plain bogus.
Yeah, I'm going to get some wine.
I'll join you.
- Walt.
- Yeah? Tie your bow-tie.
And where did you put those crab cakes I told you to bring? - Oh.
- Tell me you did not forget them at your house.
No, princess, they're in my car.
Just give me five minutes.
Hey, uh, Pete, can you do me a favor? Nobody told me to wear a jacket.
It's steak night, Gary.
Common sense.
All right, I'm going to run these crab cakes in to my dad, and then I was peckish.
Hey, could you say hi to Screwsie, if you see her? Why don't you tell her yourself? 'Cause it might get kind of weird.
Or bold.
Have some confidence, backfat.
I don't know why I'm so insecure.
Whew.
Backfat need a backbone.
All right, you've got this.
Yeah, I do.
Was that Gary? Almost.
Oh, I owe you for this.
- Feels light.
- Yeah, clem took his cut.
Oh, well, since the seal has been broken.
Mm.
Mmm! What are you working on? Crab cakes.
Get in on this.
This is my son, Pete.
- Master Pete.
- This is Gerald.
Gerald and I did the odd couple in Toluca Lake.
- Oh.
- Incoming.
Oop.
How long have you had these? Feels light.
Um, felt good to me.
- Hi, Pete.
- Hey.
Tie your bow-tie.
Absolutely.
What are you doing here? Just dropping off some appetizers.
Whoa, safety meeting.
You are on fire.
Thank you.
And your legs look That's enough.
So Ben's got "surgery"? Yeah, it's a little weird, you just showing up here, don't you think? You think I'm crashing the wedding to be with you? I don't know You usually wear a jacket when you deliver appetizers? - It's secret steak night.
- Why is it secret? I'm not at liberty to say.
I think you should go.
Yeah, I'm gonna go.
The guys are in the truck, waiting for me.
Enjoy my taillights.
- I will not.
- Well, is this the famous Ben? Oh, no, no, no.
- This is Pete, he was just - How you doing? You show up to a black tie event in that? Are you high? Probably not still.
Ooh, are you busting balls? Is he busting balls? I don't know.
I love it.
We're doing shots.
- Come on.
- Great.
We're doing shots.
But I was supposed to go, now you want me to stay? Yes.
I can't what? I can't hear you.
Please.
I'm really confused, just tell me that you want me to be your hero.
Please, Pete, be my hero.
How do you know this clown? - Well - I'm her contractor.
I wish I was handy.
My second wife's brother was super-handy.
Losing him was the worst part of the divorce.
That was probably pretty rough on the kids too.
They bounce.
Except for Jason.
He's puh.
He couldn't make it tonight.
He's in cabo with mommy.
Oh, I love cabo.
It's the best.
And you know paseo's? Oh, incredible fish tacos.
Google it.
Surf shack.
You surf too? Only when he's supposed to be at work.
That's it, done.
We're switching jackets and I'm leaving here as you.
Give me some hair! That man has a serious crush on me.
Yeah, you could be the next Anna.
Well, uh, my work here is done.
You wanna just leave the money on the nightstand, or Buy you dinner, if it'd make you feel less cheap.
I got nowhere else to be.
I'm beyond peckish right now.
How long has it been? About a quarter of a tank.
Shouldn't we turn this off? I need my booty heat.
My back runs cold.
Okay, this is ridiculous.
I'm starving.
You're starting to look like A blond t-bone to me right now.
Dibs on his backfat.
The backfat is the sweetest part of a Gary.
What he's doing in there? Maybe he's trying to leave, but he can't.
He's not trapped, it's a wedding, not a well.
- You never been married? - Mm-mmm.
You ever have steak tartare? You ever have that? Well, you know who I wouldn't want to be? Harrison Ford.
Oh, he is so typecast.
He's totally pigeon-holed.
He can only play the lead.
- Handcuffed.
- Yeah.
Yeah.
Yeah.
Who's that? Ooh, pretty dress.
Whole thing's about two seasons behind, though.
Yes, she's not from L.
A.
- No.
- Boston.
- Yeah.
- Maybe Cincinnati.
Could be yeah.
Definitely an out-of-towner though, right? Perfect.
She'll be going to the airport right after the farewell brunch.
While still smelling of my musk.
Dibs.
Bastard.
I'm not bussing your tables.
- Okay.
- I'm telling you that now.
Okay.
Chug! Chug! Chug! Chug! Chug! Chug! Suck it, Riggins! I have a bruised rib, so It's hard for you to wear a bra? Uh Bros? You in, or are you out? Absolutely not.
Uh, no, this is a work event for us, so I get it, ma'am.
Ma'am? Pete, table eight wants to meet you.
Oh, and I'd love to meet them, Chuck, but I need a second here.
Good God, I'm blowin' up.
I got beer all over my shoe.
You spilled? I call D.
Q.
On chug contest.
First, she says her boyfriend has surgery.
Then ten minutes later she's with that ridiculous contractor.
Well, he was kind of hot.
Mark said she was chugging beer? It's like the holiday party all over again.
And she wants to be partner? She's a mess.
Ah, wow, what they say? Said"Kind of hot.
" That's good.
Are you okay? Come with me.
What are you doing? Trust me.
I simply don't.
Come on.
Excuse me, dude.
We're going to tear this place up.
Oh, really? So are you team bride, or groom? Ah, the bride's my sister.
Oh, your little sister's getting married.
- Yeah.
- Yeah.
Feeling the heat? Uh, it's a little rough.
Yeah, it is.
- You local? - I'm actually down from Oregon.
Are you now? Walt! Are you kidding me? To be continued.
Okay.
These arms of mine Kind of like dancing on air.
Not at all.
All right, come with me.
Where what What are you doing? You didn't have that calamari, did you? No, what calamari? That's what did you in at the holiday party last year, when you got that awful food poisoning, which was confirmed by those two separate doctors.
Yes, and everyone thought I was hammered.
- They're not listening.
- They don't care.
You know, this would be a lot sexier if you just let me lead.
You're a terrible dancer.
- I'm going to dip you.
- Oh, no, don't.
- I'm going to dip you hard.
- Please don't.
Uhh! Yeah, they're not looking.
Stay in it, back straight.
Shoulders.
Abort, I've got nothing but blood and beer in my head.
- Ooh.
- Oh.
I got a, uh I gotta take care of something.
Bob, can I cut in, please? Hi, Anna.
I heard what you said, a little while ago.
What are you talking about? Since you seem to be deciding factor on who makes partner, let me just throw some numbers at you.
Last year I billed 2,200 hours, brought in six new clients, and got exactly one standing offer from hirsch and hanson to be, guess what, a partner.
Think about it.
You too, Bob.
Enjoy my headlights.
Taillights.
Taillights.
I hope she doesn't puke like last year.
You know, that veered from my original plan.
You're such a terrible dancer, I had to improvise.
- I've got this rib injury.
- Really? It just hurts to move laterally.
- It's like - Yeah, mm-hmm.
Thanks for hanging around.
You kind of went ape out there.
My God, what was I thinking? It's not funny.
It's going to bite me in the ass on monday.
Sometimes, when you're inappropriate in a workplace setting, they end up respecting you more, for being honest.
They don't.
Really? They do.
And, you know, Alex I want to be honest with you right now.
Okay.
Gary took your necklace.
And he broke it.
I'd appreciate it if, you know, I could handle this internally.
He's, uh He's not a bad kid.
Just to be clear, any ground you gained tonight you just lost.
- So, we're at zero again.
- Pretty much.
- I can live with that.
- Okay.
Where are we next week? You're unbelievably fired.
Oh.
Well, I'd turn in my bow-tie, but I flushed it.
Bob invited me to his house in Telluride.
Good.
You're going to make partner before I do.
How many years of High School do you need for that? Wow, anybody going by the marina del rey day's inn? - Out of towner? - The bride's sister.
Rachel? She's crazy.
That's Portland's problem.
I'm out.
I'm on it.
Hey, mark.
Hey, two glasses of champagne, please.
Actually, can I get the bottle? Expecting a big night? Always.
Thank you, sir.
You made it.
make a wish, baby - how'd the surgery go? - He died.
But, in the helicopter, so it's all good, you know, liability-wise.
- Still, it's a it's a loss.
- Yeah.
Is there any food left? - Yeah.
- Okay.
Let my love rain down on you we could wash away the past leaving so early? Well, my date's date showed up.
Bummer.
It's all good.
I'm in her head now.
Oh, we're starving! Okay, boys, late-night steak night.
Gary, remind me to give you a heads-up about some potential monday morning weirdness.
Come on, come on.
Let's go, let's go.
Uh-oh.
Out of gas.
Clem You know I love my booty heat.
Hey, Terry, do you have a second? - Um - I'd like you to meet my raison d'etre.
I'm Eloise.
Oh, that's a great name, that I gave you.
I didn't know you had a granddaughter.
A daughter, actually.
My my marriage ended, and, uh, well, now it's just the two of us.
What's going on here, Walt? Terry, I am coming to you today with my hat in my hand.
I'm not too proud You have one son, Pete.
He's like 6'4".
Yes, Eloise's half-brother.
- I don't believe you.
- No, this This is my daughter, Eloise, and we're We're very poor.
Is this some weird acting exercise? No, this is my daughter, - Eloise.
- Walt Clearly, I've taken the wrong approach here.
You need to get out.
I would like my thursday night shift back.
- Now.
- Fair enough.
Um, just for me, as a note, where did I lose you? - Daughter.
- Seriously.
- I do.
- It's over.
Okay, here we go.
Thanks for your time.