Boy Meets Girl (2009) s01e04 Episode Script
Episode 4
Stop calling me Veronica! You've got to help me.
I'm having a nightmare.
Now.
I want it to stop.
I was poor and insane.
Great.
That's just great.
You really love her, don't you? Ever thought you might be wasting your time? You are you.
We're your mum and dad, love.
- ??? - This bus goes to Rosewood.
Just get on with it and drive.
I'll forget who I am, and then I'll just think I'm her.
If ever I see you two round here again, you're dead.
All right? It was a psychological leftover from the accident.
Exactly.
I've got this totally under control, thank you.
So good to see you back to your old self.
We're getting married.
Darling, we're getting married! - I'm Danny.
- Stop saying that.
I've been thinking about you.
And I've been thinking about you.
I know.
It's a total shock.
I never saw it coming.
Well, I guess I asked her.
We just kind of decided.
Yes.
Yes, I am over the moon.
I want us to be together.
And how are we going to do that? I'll get rid of that idiot boyfriend, and we'll ride off into the sunset.
You make me feel You make me feel You make me feel like a natural woman Woman Prove it.
What would Danny know about you that no-one else knows? If you were really Danny, you'd already know that.
OK.
He's not your real dad.
But it doesn't matter, because you've always treated him like he was.
Boy Meets Girl s01ep04 ??This is hard for me to get my head round.
You're the first one who's managed.
So what happened? Do you know? Has this happened before? I mean, man.
This is huge.
If people knew, if they believe it, it would be like the biggest story in the world.
It changes everything we know about everything.
But they don't believe me.
'Cause They locked me up for trying to tell them.
What's it like? What's what like? Being a bird.
Do you feel like a woman? - Are you more into women's stuff? - Yeah.
Yeah.
It's non-stop shopping, fake tan and celebrity gossip with me these days.
What I don't get is why you've been living her life.
And what was I supposed to do? It's wrong.
Doing that.
What was I supposed to do? Think about it, Pete.
What would you have done? I didn't have any choice.
She's got a boyfriend, hasn't she? ??He was in the paper.
So? Does he think you're her? He's an idiot.
You'd be amazed what he believes.
Isn't that a bit? A bit what? If he thinks you're his girlfriend, don't you have to act like you are? I mean, hasn't he tried to to, well, kiss you, and stuff? You haven't? No.
I haven't.
I fancy women.
I really fancy women.
Just trust me on that.
Freaky shit, mate.
So where is she? Is she in you? I think so, but I can't find her.
I don't know what we'd do even if we did???.
- What if you can never get back? - I don't know.
But listen, Pete.
They locked me up once for trying to tell the truth.
I won't go through that again.
You keep this between me and you.
We have to find him.
I know, but don't screw this up, Pete.
Don't tell anyone.
For God's sake don't tell Fiona.
Do you have your library card? Er, look, I'm sorry.
I've forgotten it.
What's your name? Daniel Reed.
OK.
- In you go.
- Thank you.
Just how you like it.
One extra shot, and not too much milk.
- Can I get you anything else? - No, thank you.
And I'd like to book a week off next month.
Marcus is taking me skiing.
He fancies Klosters, but I think Aspen is much cooler these days.
Hey, Veronica.
That trends piece is much more like it.
Good to have you back.
You lucky girl.
Who's sent you these? "To my bride-to-be"? Oh my God! Are you getting married? Vee, you dark horse.
Why didn't you tell us? Excuse me, everyone.
Veronica is getting married.
I think this calls for some bubbly.
We need a fresh start.
We've allowed the campaign to fail.
What campaign? The campaign to find Danny.
It's important.
There's a lot at stake.
Who are you texting? Er, no-one.
Right.
Listen to me.
We need more posters.
Ask around more.
Cover pubs and bars.
We need a big push.
Pete, has it occurred to you that Danny might have just had enough of this place? That he might have had enough of us? Of, well, you, even.
??I know for an absolute fact that that isn't true.
- How? - I can't say.
Aw, Jeez, Pete.
Give it a rest.
You're not a detective.
You don't know what you're going on about.
I do.
As it happens.
Then go and find him, Sherlock.
So you're not going to help me? Well, I I've got a lot on my plate.
Yeah? Like what? Can't say.
Fancy seeing you here, Danny.
Well, I I've never actually been out with a girl.
Properly.
I've been with women.
I've always known, but Just never had a real relationship.
This is all very different for me and all.
Very, very different.
- Have you not been with a woman? - Oh, I have.
Sort of.
I've just never I've just never You know.
'Been in love? Dear God.
I know you don't exist, and if you do, you're a heartless bastard at the best of times.
But please Please let this moment last for ever.
' Who are you? You're not like anyone I've ever met.
'Oh yes I am.
But you never noticed him.
' You haven't done this before, have you? What are you thinking about? About when I was younger.
And happy.
I haven't been happy often enough.
Are you happy now? Veronica? Vee! You all right? It's not how it looks.
It's that nothing was too much trouble.
- OK, it's pricey.
- 'Shut up.
' Gorgeous.
'You've got to tell him.
' But, having said that, boy, they were really impressive.
'I'm thinking in my head with her voice.
' Hello.
Are you listening to me? I'm hanging on your every word darling.
- Sarky bugger.
- That's me.
'Tell him.
' What do you think? 'Well, there's never a good time.
' I think 'Just tell him.
' I Um Bit overwhelmed by it all? I understand.
Listen, I'll do some more preliminary research and come back to you with my findings.
Hello? It's Jay.
yes.
yes.
'What the hell are you doing, Vee? Have you even stopped and thought about his feelings? You're supposed to be marrying the man.
And who is she? And since when did you shag girls? What's going on?' Hope you didn't catch any of that.
- No.
- Because you might be in for a bit of a surprise.
'What made me think I could do this?' All right, Danny boy.
Sleep well, I hope? What would you like for breakfast? I don't suppose you've got any smoked salmon? Bagels? You know what we're doing today, Danny boy? I'm giving you the chance to pay off all your debts to me in one go.
Please listen to me.
- I am not Danny.
- No.
You listen to me.
One job, and we're even.
It's a big job, mind.
Proper big job.
Oh, and if you don't do it, Steve-O will break both your legs.
In several places.
The poster looks good.
(missing) Really stands out.
You know that I'm still more than happy to help, don't you? - I didn't mean to sound, you know - Yeah.
- Want a coffee? - No.
There's something that I um That I ought to tell you.
I am kind of seeing someone.
Oh, right.
I thought as much.
It's Veronica.
I just thought that you should know.
Is that a problem? You bastard.
Thanks for the support.
Wait.
Stay away from her.
???I thought it would be a good idea to tell you because you're her friend.
No.
no.
Listen to me.
You don't know what you're doing.
??Listen.
- Stay away from her.
- Is this bigotry or is it just jealousy? Hiya.
- I'm looking to buy a ring.
- Is this for your husband? No.
It's for my girlfriend.
'You slimy, lying toad.
You two-faced bastard.
How can you do this to her? How can you stoop so low?' In about five minutes, an employee of that restaurant will set off, as they always do at this time, to the bank to pay in the previous day's takings.
Amazingly, in this day and age, they carry the cash in a plastic bag.
Very careless, really.
So we're just talking a snatch-and-grab.
We'll be watching from over here.
When you've pushed 'em to the ground, and grabbed the money - No.
No.
No.
It's illegal.
And it will be really frightening for the victim.
As soon as you've grabbed the money, run down there to the car park, where we'll have parked this van.
Climb in the back and wait.
And we casually saunter back, and drive you away.
You pull it off, and we're even.
Might even give you some of the profits.
Screw it up, and you've only got yourself to blame.
Shit.
Can I help you? Police! Robbery! Help! Robbery! So where have you been? Haven't you been trying to find me? I've had a nightmare.
A nightmare.
I have been trying to find you.
???I've been through hell - not even knowing your name.
Living on the street.
They locked me up.
They locked me up in the same place.
I've been forced to commit a robbery.
A robbery.
This awful man kept me in his farm, and now I've broken the law.
Who was he? He was horrible.
I thought he would kill me.
Sorry.
Guess that was Barry.
Friend of yours, is he? You must be joking.
So you're not a criminal? You just hang around with him.
I'm just an ordinary bloke who got out of his depth.
It's funny, seeing yourself with someone else's eyes.
What happened to us? It's just the weirdest most awful thing.
It's certainly pretty strange.
I've done some research.
I have ideas about what may have happened.
There is a theory called Transference which argues that at high voltages, molecules can move between different beings.
- I read it.
It's bollocks.
- ???wait.
It's bollocks.
We didn't swap molecules.
Our bodies remained the same.
Our minds swapped.
And anyway, swapping molecules wouldn't create a new human being.
It's nonsensical non-science.
And the guy who wrote it is a crackpot who is reviled by the entire scientific community.
I would have thought a journalist, even one in your field, would do her research.
So what did happen to us, then? Come on.
What's your theory, smart arse? Don't have one.
There isn't one.
There has to be one, because it's happened.
Hello.
What are you suggesting we do? Recreate the conditions that led to this transference.
We are not electrocuting ourselves and praying we don't die in the process.
We've got no choice.
I can't stand another minute of this.
It's all right for you.
You're used to living like this.
But I had a life.
A life I worked hard for.
A life I miss so much.
I don't think you liked your life that much.
How would you know that? It's just my view.
I don't think it was easy keeping up this perfect life that was a load of bollocks.
A boyfriend you didn't really love.
Cutting your parents out of your life.
And lying about them.
A best friend who must have annoyed you, and whose partner you were screwing.
And let's talk about that, shall we? I mean, Ali.
What were you thinking? You can't have been happy.
I don't think you liked yourself.
How dare you? How dare you? How do you know about my parents? I met them.
Were you just embarrassed by them? Was that it? So you steal my life, and then you dare to judge me? I didn't steal your life.
They took me for you, and they wouldn't believe any other explanation.
And do you know what? I'm bloody brilliant at being you.
I think I'm doing a better job than you were.
No, I don't think I did love him very much, but that's for me to sort out, isn't it? And when I get back to being me, I'm going to erase every mistake I ever made.
Look.
We've found each other.
Now we have to try and find a way back.
I don't want to go back.
I'm not willing to electrocute myself on the back of some spurious internet bullshit.
So you do want my life? I can't blame you.
Who'd want to be you? I certainly don't.
Look.
Let's both of us find a real way back.
But until we do, I am staying where I am.
I don't know you, so I can't judge you the way you've done me.
But you must know in your heart that this is the morally right thing to do.
It will only be until we find a real answer.
You can't do this to me.
You can't steal my identity.
My address is Flat 7, 115 Marbey Avenue, Rosewood.
The keys are underneath the plant pot by the door.
I've got a car.
- The keys are in the bowl by the window.
- Stop it.
- I work at the DIY store on Landon Road.
- Stop it.
My best mates are Pete and Fiona.
They'll welcome you???.
Every second that you steal from my life, is wrong, and you know that.
We'll work this out.
OK? I'll be in touch.
Call me any time, Danny.
You know where I live.
He's waiting by her desk.
I'm going to try and grab her???.
There's a guy waiting to see you.
??? He says he's a friend of yours.
Now, if you want, I could call Security but I ???wasn't sure whether you wanted to talk to him.
How dare you? How dare you do that to her? Shall we go and talk somewhere more private? What you're doing is disgusting.
Get off me.
You're taking advantage of her.
It's ???wrong.
I didn't set out for this to happen.
She's in love with me.
With who she thinks I am.
And you're not encouraging her one bit?! Danny finally gets his chance.
It's cheap, mate.
It's really cheap.
But why? Why is it? Seriously? Because you're not who she thinks you are.
In a way, I am.
She sees me for who I am.
Just Just not what I am.
Listen to yourself.
What's got into you, Danny? What are you playing at? Living this poor woman's life.
In a flat.
Kidding people in this office.
Living the high life.
When will people understand? What else was I supposed to do? - Who else have you talked to? - No-one.
You're a hypocrite, Danny Reed.
Living in a yuppie flat, wearing posh clothes, driving a posh car.
Not so angry about the system now!??? - She's more complicated than she seems.
- How would you know? Can you honestly find one single justification for what you're doing? If you want to go on living this screwed-up little fantasy until we find the real Veronica - fine.
But it's over with Fiona.
You tell her now, and you stay away.
Got it? Dogs live better than this.
I wondered if you would show your face again.
Little bugger.
You owe me a lot of rent.
You charge someone money to live in this dump? You should pay them.
I'm giving you notice of eviction.
Out by tomorrow.
It's Fine by me.
I wasn't planning on hanging around anyway.
This food is gorgeous.
I don't get to eat in places like this very often.
I know.
Amazing how quickly you get used to it.
I could get used to this.
Is everything all right? Not really, no.
Has Pete been to see you? What did he say? Not much.
Don't be harsh on him.
He fancies me.
That is why he will have warned you off.
He tried it on with me.
- He did what? - I don't care what Pete thinks.
I don't care what anyone thinks.
I just want to be with you.
And I Oh hell.
I want to be with you.
More than anything I've ever known.
- But? - But things are very complicated.
Are you backing out on me? Because that would be very cruel.
Look.
Whatever happens, I want you to know that this has been It's been bloody amazing, .
.
knowing it does exist, this stuff.
It's It's changed me.
You've change me.
For good.
But the thing is If I'm to have this, then it has to be fair, and right and proper.
And the thing is, I've I've lied.
I've lied to too many people, and that stops here.
Is this a lie? I don't think you would want me if you knew.
I would.
I would want you.
I would want you anyway.
Oh, I wish that were true.
I I don't understand any of this.
You're right.
This This has been the most amazing thing.
And you've change me too.
So don't leave me.
I have to.
I'm sorry.
Surprise! Lovely to see you.
- Congratulations.
- Cheers.
Did you guess? I had no idea.
Thanks.
Thanks, ev Thanks, everyone for coming.
This is just really our chance to tell the world how pleased we are to be getting married.
Veronica.
You've made me the happiest man alive.
Congratulations, Veronica.
You remember Sally? Paul's sister.
It's nice of you to invite me.
I really do appreciate it, Jay.
And how is Paul? Well, he's dead.
Obviously.
Of course.
I mean, it's still hard to imagine him not here with us.
we're just going to Sorry.
Oh my God.
That was so - Congratulations! - Thanks! That was so embarrassing.
- Why did you say that? - I have no idea.
- I'm getting you a drink? - No.
I'll get myself one.
Thanks.
Congrats.
This is so exciting.
- Can I get you a glass of wine? - Yeah.
Wait.
No.
Beer.
I want a beer.
Thanks.
Hello, love.
It's good to see you again.
Well done, love.
He's a fine lad.
- Actually, I - What, love? It's really good to see you both.
You're looking much better.
Isn't she, love? Oh, yes.
Much better.
Would you excuse me for a minute? - Have you told him? - Do you want to stay out of this? - No.
I don't think I do.
- Siobhan was shocked.
Can't say I was surprised.
Shall we go outside and have a little chat? Can we do this another time? The time is now, Vee.
How long has this been going on? - I don't want to talk about it.
- Well, you're going to have to.
- Have there been other women? - No.
For God's sake, Vee, why haven't you told me? We're best friends.
I shared a bed with you.
Don't flatter yourself.
You're not my type, sweetheart.
If I were you, sweetheart, I'd be a bit nicer to your best friend.
She's trying to help you ?? What I want to believe, Vee, is that this is a one-off.
That we can put this behind us.
That it won't happen again.
That you will marry Jay and live happily ever after.
That is not happening.
I'm not marrying Jay.
So why is he celebrating your engagement? He doesn't listen.
He railroaded me.
He knows I don't want to marry him.
He's just not listening properly.
Did you ever have any intention of marrying him? Oh Poor Jay.
You're a horrible liar, and I'm sorry, but I just think that I can't think about you in the same way.
- Oh well.
- I always suspected you were a bit of a lezzer.
- Shut up, Ali.
- Well, she is.
Shit.
What's happening, guys? Are you going to tell him, or am I? Will someone tell me what the hell is going on? I um ahem.
I tried telling you the truth before, Jay.
But you wouldn't believe me.
She's having an affair.
With a girl who works in a DIY store.
She thinks she's in love with her.
That's not it.
So you're not having an affair with a girl? I wouldn't call it an affair exactly.
It was Why did you say you'd marry me? But I didn't.
You told me I was marrying you.
My God, that explains so much.
It explains everything.
Jesus! Sod it.
I'm not marrying you because you don't deserve me.
no, You're right.
I don't.
??? Tell the real Veronica that when she comes back.
I'm really sorry.
Not sorry enough to tell him the truth, though, are we, Danny? Danny? Why are you calling her Danny? - You're that nutter.
- Get in the car.
Veronica, don't go near him.
He's not well.
We need to talk.
Now.
- Vee! - Hey - wait! What are you doing? The forecast is for storms.
And I've got all the equipment I need.
We might get lucky.
- We might not.
- What? Are you out of your mind? What the hell is going on? Veronica's accident on the night of the storm.
- what? - Do you remember? I think her life could be in danger.
?? We need to get up there.
??? I don't know who you are - Did you hear me? I said her life could be in danger.
- But what about us? - Yeah, what about us? Oi! You're wasting your time.
There's no way this is going to work.
- You're going to kill us.
- Listen, mate.
I'm not spending another day in your shoes.
I'd like my job and my clothes and my life back, now, thanks.
What's going on Your girlfriend is planning on having another accident.
What does that mean? What the hell does that mean? I'm sick of people talking to me in riddles.
- I'm not telling you any more.
- If you don't explain, - I'll stop the car.
- But your foot down, and maybe we can stop this happening.
Come on.
We're not going to go through with this.
On the contrary.
I've planned it meticulously.
All we need is the weather.
Veronica, please.
You can fight me all the way, and I'll drag you if I have to.
- Or you can come quietly.
- I don't want to do it.
Danny, this has to stop.
Listen to me.
It's a lie.
It's wrong.
It's not who we are.
You know that.
OK.
Conductors attract lightning.
One each.
Sounds promising.
Aren't you scared? You must be scared.
I'm scared.
This could kill us.
Well, either I'm killed, in which case it will all be over, or I go back to being me, and it's all over.
Either way, this nightmare will end.
- And what about me? - What about you? You might be about to murder me.
That's what.
You agreed.
- OK.
Assisted suicide.
- You have to try.
Oh God no.
Hang on.
We could tell everybody.
We could get them on side.
We could get them to help us find a real way back.
My mate Pete knows.
We can get him to explain to everyone.
Please! Please, Veronica! Veronica! God.
Are you all right? Is it you? Danny, is it you? Are you back? God.
Vee, what you put me through.
I'm so sorry, Jay.
I know now I can't do this any more.
I can't.
Danny.
Danny.
Wait.
Where are you going? Is it you? Are you a man? Are you back to Danny? Yeah, I'm Danny.
Not the one you knew.
What does that mean? Where are you going? I don't know.
Can I come with you? If you like.
Do you know how much of our lives we waste? We could be meeting anybody.
Going anywhere.
Doing anything.
And what do we do? Sit in the pub whinging about the England football team, and the weather.
It's pathetic.
And another thing.
Why don't they tell us how unhappy rich people are? I tell you why.
Because then they wouldn't be able to sell us all the crap they want us to buy.
That's why.
It stinks.
That's what it's all about, mate.
??
I'm having a nightmare.
Now.
I want it to stop.
I was poor and insane.
Great.
That's just great.
You really love her, don't you? Ever thought you might be wasting your time? You are you.
We're your mum and dad, love.
- ??? - This bus goes to Rosewood.
Just get on with it and drive.
I'll forget who I am, and then I'll just think I'm her.
If ever I see you two round here again, you're dead.
All right? It was a psychological leftover from the accident.
Exactly.
I've got this totally under control, thank you.
So good to see you back to your old self.
We're getting married.
Darling, we're getting married! - I'm Danny.
- Stop saying that.
I've been thinking about you.
And I've been thinking about you.
I know.
It's a total shock.
I never saw it coming.
Well, I guess I asked her.
We just kind of decided.
Yes.
Yes, I am over the moon.
I want us to be together.
And how are we going to do that? I'll get rid of that idiot boyfriend, and we'll ride off into the sunset.
You make me feel You make me feel You make me feel like a natural woman Woman Prove it.
What would Danny know about you that no-one else knows? If you were really Danny, you'd already know that.
OK.
He's not your real dad.
But it doesn't matter, because you've always treated him like he was.
Boy Meets Girl s01ep04 ??This is hard for me to get my head round.
You're the first one who's managed.
So what happened? Do you know? Has this happened before? I mean, man.
This is huge.
If people knew, if they believe it, it would be like the biggest story in the world.
It changes everything we know about everything.
But they don't believe me.
'Cause They locked me up for trying to tell them.
What's it like? What's what like? Being a bird.
Do you feel like a woman? - Are you more into women's stuff? - Yeah.
Yeah.
It's non-stop shopping, fake tan and celebrity gossip with me these days.
What I don't get is why you've been living her life.
And what was I supposed to do? It's wrong.
Doing that.
What was I supposed to do? Think about it, Pete.
What would you have done? I didn't have any choice.
She's got a boyfriend, hasn't she? ??He was in the paper.
So? Does he think you're her? He's an idiot.
You'd be amazed what he believes.
Isn't that a bit? A bit what? If he thinks you're his girlfriend, don't you have to act like you are? I mean, hasn't he tried to to, well, kiss you, and stuff? You haven't? No.
I haven't.
I fancy women.
I really fancy women.
Just trust me on that.
Freaky shit, mate.
So where is she? Is she in you? I think so, but I can't find her.
I don't know what we'd do even if we did???.
- What if you can never get back? - I don't know.
But listen, Pete.
They locked me up once for trying to tell the truth.
I won't go through that again.
You keep this between me and you.
We have to find him.
I know, but don't screw this up, Pete.
Don't tell anyone.
For God's sake don't tell Fiona.
Do you have your library card? Er, look, I'm sorry.
I've forgotten it.
What's your name? Daniel Reed.
OK.
- In you go.
- Thank you.
Just how you like it.
One extra shot, and not too much milk.
- Can I get you anything else? - No, thank you.
And I'd like to book a week off next month.
Marcus is taking me skiing.
He fancies Klosters, but I think Aspen is much cooler these days.
Hey, Veronica.
That trends piece is much more like it.
Good to have you back.
You lucky girl.
Who's sent you these? "To my bride-to-be"? Oh my God! Are you getting married? Vee, you dark horse.
Why didn't you tell us? Excuse me, everyone.
Veronica is getting married.
I think this calls for some bubbly.
We need a fresh start.
We've allowed the campaign to fail.
What campaign? The campaign to find Danny.
It's important.
There's a lot at stake.
Who are you texting? Er, no-one.
Right.
Listen to me.
We need more posters.
Ask around more.
Cover pubs and bars.
We need a big push.
Pete, has it occurred to you that Danny might have just had enough of this place? That he might have had enough of us? Of, well, you, even.
??I know for an absolute fact that that isn't true.
- How? - I can't say.
Aw, Jeez, Pete.
Give it a rest.
You're not a detective.
You don't know what you're going on about.
I do.
As it happens.
Then go and find him, Sherlock.
So you're not going to help me? Well, I I've got a lot on my plate.
Yeah? Like what? Can't say.
Fancy seeing you here, Danny.
Well, I I've never actually been out with a girl.
Properly.
I've been with women.
I've always known, but Just never had a real relationship.
This is all very different for me and all.
Very, very different.
- Have you not been with a woman? - Oh, I have.
Sort of.
I've just never I've just never You know.
'Been in love? Dear God.
I know you don't exist, and if you do, you're a heartless bastard at the best of times.
But please Please let this moment last for ever.
' Who are you? You're not like anyone I've ever met.
'Oh yes I am.
But you never noticed him.
' You haven't done this before, have you? What are you thinking about? About when I was younger.
And happy.
I haven't been happy often enough.
Are you happy now? Veronica? Vee! You all right? It's not how it looks.
It's that nothing was too much trouble.
- OK, it's pricey.
- 'Shut up.
' Gorgeous.
'You've got to tell him.
' But, having said that, boy, they were really impressive.
'I'm thinking in my head with her voice.
' Hello.
Are you listening to me? I'm hanging on your every word darling.
- Sarky bugger.
- That's me.
'Tell him.
' What do you think? 'Well, there's never a good time.
' I think 'Just tell him.
' I Um Bit overwhelmed by it all? I understand.
Listen, I'll do some more preliminary research and come back to you with my findings.
Hello? It's Jay.
yes.
yes.
'What the hell are you doing, Vee? Have you even stopped and thought about his feelings? You're supposed to be marrying the man.
And who is she? And since when did you shag girls? What's going on?' Hope you didn't catch any of that.
- No.
- Because you might be in for a bit of a surprise.
'What made me think I could do this?' All right, Danny boy.
Sleep well, I hope? What would you like for breakfast? I don't suppose you've got any smoked salmon? Bagels? You know what we're doing today, Danny boy? I'm giving you the chance to pay off all your debts to me in one go.
Please listen to me.
- I am not Danny.
- No.
You listen to me.
One job, and we're even.
It's a big job, mind.
Proper big job.
Oh, and if you don't do it, Steve-O will break both your legs.
In several places.
The poster looks good.
(missing) Really stands out.
You know that I'm still more than happy to help, don't you? - I didn't mean to sound, you know - Yeah.
- Want a coffee? - No.
There's something that I um That I ought to tell you.
I am kind of seeing someone.
Oh, right.
I thought as much.
It's Veronica.
I just thought that you should know.
Is that a problem? You bastard.
Thanks for the support.
Wait.
Stay away from her.
???I thought it would be a good idea to tell you because you're her friend.
No.
no.
Listen to me.
You don't know what you're doing.
??Listen.
- Stay away from her.
- Is this bigotry or is it just jealousy? Hiya.
- I'm looking to buy a ring.
- Is this for your husband? No.
It's for my girlfriend.
'You slimy, lying toad.
You two-faced bastard.
How can you do this to her? How can you stoop so low?' In about five minutes, an employee of that restaurant will set off, as they always do at this time, to the bank to pay in the previous day's takings.
Amazingly, in this day and age, they carry the cash in a plastic bag.
Very careless, really.
So we're just talking a snatch-and-grab.
We'll be watching from over here.
When you've pushed 'em to the ground, and grabbed the money - No.
No.
No.
It's illegal.
And it will be really frightening for the victim.
As soon as you've grabbed the money, run down there to the car park, where we'll have parked this van.
Climb in the back and wait.
And we casually saunter back, and drive you away.
You pull it off, and we're even.
Might even give you some of the profits.
Screw it up, and you've only got yourself to blame.
Shit.
Can I help you? Police! Robbery! Help! Robbery! So where have you been? Haven't you been trying to find me? I've had a nightmare.
A nightmare.
I have been trying to find you.
???I've been through hell - not even knowing your name.
Living on the street.
They locked me up.
They locked me up in the same place.
I've been forced to commit a robbery.
A robbery.
This awful man kept me in his farm, and now I've broken the law.
Who was he? He was horrible.
I thought he would kill me.
Sorry.
Guess that was Barry.
Friend of yours, is he? You must be joking.
So you're not a criminal? You just hang around with him.
I'm just an ordinary bloke who got out of his depth.
It's funny, seeing yourself with someone else's eyes.
What happened to us? It's just the weirdest most awful thing.
It's certainly pretty strange.
I've done some research.
I have ideas about what may have happened.
There is a theory called Transference which argues that at high voltages, molecules can move between different beings.
- I read it.
It's bollocks.
- ???wait.
It's bollocks.
We didn't swap molecules.
Our bodies remained the same.
Our minds swapped.
And anyway, swapping molecules wouldn't create a new human being.
It's nonsensical non-science.
And the guy who wrote it is a crackpot who is reviled by the entire scientific community.
I would have thought a journalist, even one in your field, would do her research.
So what did happen to us, then? Come on.
What's your theory, smart arse? Don't have one.
There isn't one.
There has to be one, because it's happened.
Hello.
What are you suggesting we do? Recreate the conditions that led to this transference.
We are not electrocuting ourselves and praying we don't die in the process.
We've got no choice.
I can't stand another minute of this.
It's all right for you.
You're used to living like this.
But I had a life.
A life I worked hard for.
A life I miss so much.
I don't think you liked your life that much.
How would you know that? It's just my view.
I don't think it was easy keeping up this perfect life that was a load of bollocks.
A boyfriend you didn't really love.
Cutting your parents out of your life.
And lying about them.
A best friend who must have annoyed you, and whose partner you were screwing.
And let's talk about that, shall we? I mean, Ali.
What were you thinking? You can't have been happy.
I don't think you liked yourself.
How dare you? How dare you? How do you know about my parents? I met them.
Were you just embarrassed by them? Was that it? So you steal my life, and then you dare to judge me? I didn't steal your life.
They took me for you, and they wouldn't believe any other explanation.
And do you know what? I'm bloody brilliant at being you.
I think I'm doing a better job than you were.
No, I don't think I did love him very much, but that's for me to sort out, isn't it? And when I get back to being me, I'm going to erase every mistake I ever made.
Look.
We've found each other.
Now we have to try and find a way back.
I don't want to go back.
I'm not willing to electrocute myself on the back of some spurious internet bullshit.
So you do want my life? I can't blame you.
Who'd want to be you? I certainly don't.
Look.
Let's both of us find a real way back.
But until we do, I am staying where I am.
I don't know you, so I can't judge you the way you've done me.
But you must know in your heart that this is the morally right thing to do.
It will only be until we find a real answer.
You can't do this to me.
You can't steal my identity.
My address is Flat 7, 115 Marbey Avenue, Rosewood.
The keys are underneath the plant pot by the door.
I've got a car.
- The keys are in the bowl by the window.
- Stop it.
- I work at the DIY store on Landon Road.
- Stop it.
My best mates are Pete and Fiona.
They'll welcome you???.
Every second that you steal from my life, is wrong, and you know that.
We'll work this out.
OK? I'll be in touch.
Call me any time, Danny.
You know where I live.
He's waiting by her desk.
I'm going to try and grab her???.
There's a guy waiting to see you.
??? He says he's a friend of yours.
Now, if you want, I could call Security but I ???wasn't sure whether you wanted to talk to him.
How dare you? How dare you do that to her? Shall we go and talk somewhere more private? What you're doing is disgusting.
Get off me.
You're taking advantage of her.
It's ???wrong.
I didn't set out for this to happen.
She's in love with me.
With who she thinks I am.
And you're not encouraging her one bit?! Danny finally gets his chance.
It's cheap, mate.
It's really cheap.
But why? Why is it? Seriously? Because you're not who she thinks you are.
In a way, I am.
She sees me for who I am.
Just Just not what I am.
Listen to yourself.
What's got into you, Danny? What are you playing at? Living this poor woman's life.
In a flat.
Kidding people in this office.
Living the high life.
When will people understand? What else was I supposed to do? - Who else have you talked to? - No-one.
You're a hypocrite, Danny Reed.
Living in a yuppie flat, wearing posh clothes, driving a posh car.
Not so angry about the system now!??? - She's more complicated than she seems.
- How would you know? Can you honestly find one single justification for what you're doing? If you want to go on living this screwed-up little fantasy until we find the real Veronica - fine.
But it's over with Fiona.
You tell her now, and you stay away.
Got it? Dogs live better than this.
I wondered if you would show your face again.
Little bugger.
You owe me a lot of rent.
You charge someone money to live in this dump? You should pay them.
I'm giving you notice of eviction.
Out by tomorrow.
It's Fine by me.
I wasn't planning on hanging around anyway.
This food is gorgeous.
I don't get to eat in places like this very often.
I know.
Amazing how quickly you get used to it.
I could get used to this.
Is everything all right? Not really, no.
Has Pete been to see you? What did he say? Not much.
Don't be harsh on him.
He fancies me.
That is why he will have warned you off.
He tried it on with me.
- He did what? - I don't care what Pete thinks.
I don't care what anyone thinks.
I just want to be with you.
And I Oh hell.
I want to be with you.
More than anything I've ever known.
- But? - But things are very complicated.
Are you backing out on me? Because that would be very cruel.
Look.
Whatever happens, I want you to know that this has been It's been bloody amazing, .
.
knowing it does exist, this stuff.
It's It's changed me.
You've change me.
For good.
But the thing is If I'm to have this, then it has to be fair, and right and proper.
And the thing is, I've I've lied.
I've lied to too many people, and that stops here.
Is this a lie? I don't think you would want me if you knew.
I would.
I would want you.
I would want you anyway.
Oh, I wish that were true.
I I don't understand any of this.
You're right.
This This has been the most amazing thing.
And you've change me too.
So don't leave me.
I have to.
I'm sorry.
Surprise! Lovely to see you.
- Congratulations.
- Cheers.
Did you guess? I had no idea.
Thanks.
Thanks, ev Thanks, everyone for coming.
This is just really our chance to tell the world how pleased we are to be getting married.
Veronica.
You've made me the happiest man alive.
Congratulations, Veronica.
You remember Sally? Paul's sister.
It's nice of you to invite me.
I really do appreciate it, Jay.
And how is Paul? Well, he's dead.
Obviously.
Of course.
I mean, it's still hard to imagine him not here with us.
we're just going to Sorry.
Oh my God.
That was so - Congratulations! - Thanks! That was so embarrassing.
- Why did you say that? - I have no idea.
- I'm getting you a drink? - No.
I'll get myself one.
Thanks.
Congrats.
This is so exciting.
- Can I get you a glass of wine? - Yeah.
Wait.
No.
Beer.
I want a beer.
Thanks.
Hello, love.
It's good to see you again.
Well done, love.
He's a fine lad.
- Actually, I - What, love? It's really good to see you both.
You're looking much better.
Isn't she, love? Oh, yes.
Much better.
Would you excuse me for a minute? - Have you told him? - Do you want to stay out of this? - No.
I don't think I do.
- Siobhan was shocked.
Can't say I was surprised.
Shall we go outside and have a little chat? Can we do this another time? The time is now, Vee.
How long has this been going on? - I don't want to talk about it.
- Well, you're going to have to.
- Have there been other women? - No.
For God's sake, Vee, why haven't you told me? We're best friends.
I shared a bed with you.
Don't flatter yourself.
You're not my type, sweetheart.
If I were you, sweetheart, I'd be a bit nicer to your best friend.
She's trying to help you ?? What I want to believe, Vee, is that this is a one-off.
That we can put this behind us.
That it won't happen again.
That you will marry Jay and live happily ever after.
That is not happening.
I'm not marrying Jay.
So why is he celebrating your engagement? He doesn't listen.
He railroaded me.
He knows I don't want to marry him.
He's just not listening properly.
Did you ever have any intention of marrying him? Oh Poor Jay.
You're a horrible liar, and I'm sorry, but I just think that I can't think about you in the same way.
- Oh well.
- I always suspected you were a bit of a lezzer.
- Shut up, Ali.
- Well, she is.
Shit.
What's happening, guys? Are you going to tell him, or am I? Will someone tell me what the hell is going on? I um ahem.
I tried telling you the truth before, Jay.
But you wouldn't believe me.
She's having an affair.
With a girl who works in a DIY store.
She thinks she's in love with her.
That's not it.
So you're not having an affair with a girl? I wouldn't call it an affair exactly.
It was Why did you say you'd marry me? But I didn't.
You told me I was marrying you.
My God, that explains so much.
It explains everything.
Jesus! Sod it.
I'm not marrying you because you don't deserve me.
no, You're right.
I don't.
??? Tell the real Veronica that when she comes back.
I'm really sorry.
Not sorry enough to tell him the truth, though, are we, Danny? Danny? Why are you calling her Danny? - You're that nutter.
- Get in the car.
Veronica, don't go near him.
He's not well.
We need to talk.
Now.
- Vee! - Hey - wait! What are you doing? The forecast is for storms.
And I've got all the equipment I need.
We might get lucky.
- We might not.
- What? Are you out of your mind? What the hell is going on? Veronica's accident on the night of the storm.
- what? - Do you remember? I think her life could be in danger.
?? We need to get up there.
??? I don't know who you are - Did you hear me? I said her life could be in danger.
- But what about us? - Yeah, what about us? Oi! You're wasting your time.
There's no way this is going to work.
- You're going to kill us.
- Listen, mate.
I'm not spending another day in your shoes.
I'd like my job and my clothes and my life back, now, thanks.
What's going on Your girlfriend is planning on having another accident.
What does that mean? What the hell does that mean? I'm sick of people talking to me in riddles.
- I'm not telling you any more.
- If you don't explain, - I'll stop the car.
- But your foot down, and maybe we can stop this happening.
Come on.
We're not going to go through with this.
On the contrary.
I've planned it meticulously.
All we need is the weather.
Veronica, please.
You can fight me all the way, and I'll drag you if I have to.
- Or you can come quietly.
- I don't want to do it.
Danny, this has to stop.
Listen to me.
It's a lie.
It's wrong.
It's not who we are.
You know that.
OK.
Conductors attract lightning.
One each.
Sounds promising.
Aren't you scared? You must be scared.
I'm scared.
This could kill us.
Well, either I'm killed, in which case it will all be over, or I go back to being me, and it's all over.
Either way, this nightmare will end.
- And what about me? - What about you? You might be about to murder me.
That's what.
You agreed.
- OK.
Assisted suicide.
- You have to try.
Oh God no.
Hang on.
We could tell everybody.
We could get them on side.
We could get them to help us find a real way back.
My mate Pete knows.
We can get him to explain to everyone.
Please! Please, Veronica! Veronica! God.
Are you all right? Is it you? Danny, is it you? Are you back? God.
Vee, what you put me through.
I'm so sorry, Jay.
I know now I can't do this any more.
I can't.
Danny.
Danny.
Wait.
Where are you going? Is it you? Are you a man? Are you back to Danny? Yeah, I'm Danny.
Not the one you knew.
What does that mean? Where are you going? I don't know.
Can I come with you? If you like.
Do you know how much of our lives we waste? We could be meeting anybody.
Going anywhere.
Doing anything.
And what do we do? Sit in the pub whinging about the England football team, and the weather.
It's pathetic.
And another thing.
Why don't they tell us how unhappy rich people are? I tell you why.
Because then they wouldn't be able to sell us all the crap they want us to buy.
That's why.
It stinks.
That's what it's all about, mate.
??