Easy Abby (2012) s01e04 Episode Script
Bacon and Legs
(music playful fun female starts singing) I figured out why people drink.
It works! Makes you think less about the bad stuff, more of the good stuff.
For a few hours (Abby laughing) Nope! It's noon! Scooch.
I want her to call me.
Aww What am I gonna do now? I don't have anywhere to go.
(sigh) It's your place too, you don't have to move out.
- Sara: She doesn't even care.
- Yeah.
She cares too much! If she cared so much, then why wouldn't she just call me and talk to me? She has to control every little thing! I texted her last night.
Why? You were supposed to stick to our plan.
You were supposed to show me your texts before you send them out.
- You were sleeping.
- So? I said if she didn't call me by this morning I was moving out.
Ha.
I bet she didn't like that! You can stay here as long you need to.
I don't want to stay here, I want to go home.
I want my girlfriend.
Well Tell her that! I can't now.
(Sara turns the music off) Breathe with me a minute? You know I don't breathe, I mean meditate.
Move.
(breathing heavy) God, you look pitiful.
Maybe I should try that (Abby grunts) Maybe you should try and get laid.
I need to fix this with Carolyn.
You know, maybe you shouldn't contact her for a while.
See how she likes it for once.
Abby: Just get drunk, go out with me tonight.
We'll flirt with other women.
Okay.
Or, we just go to breakfast.
We'll relax, get some coffee And then we'll stop by the shop and get Eileen's opinion on the way to the bar.
Eileen scares me.
- Too much woman for ya? - Absolutely! (laughs) This sucks Yeah.
This is why I don't have a girlfriend.
Sara: It's so stupid! Bacon will make you feel better.
- I love bacon.
- Abby: Me too.
I'm going to call her right now.
- Do what you need to do.
- What! No! Do not let me call her today.
Okay.
Geesh.
(keys jiggling coat zipper) Just breathe through your bacon is all I'm saying (door opening)
It works! Makes you think less about the bad stuff, more of the good stuff.
For a few hours (Abby laughing) Nope! It's noon! Scooch.
I want her to call me.
Aww What am I gonna do now? I don't have anywhere to go.
(sigh) It's your place too, you don't have to move out.
- Sara: She doesn't even care.
- Yeah.
She cares too much! If she cared so much, then why wouldn't she just call me and talk to me? She has to control every little thing! I texted her last night.
Why? You were supposed to stick to our plan.
You were supposed to show me your texts before you send them out.
- You were sleeping.
- So? I said if she didn't call me by this morning I was moving out.
Ha.
I bet she didn't like that! You can stay here as long you need to.
I don't want to stay here, I want to go home.
I want my girlfriend.
Well Tell her that! I can't now.
(Sara turns the music off) Breathe with me a minute? You know I don't breathe, I mean meditate.
Move.
(breathing heavy) God, you look pitiful.
Maybe I should try that (Abby grunts) Maybe you should try and get laid.
I need to fix this with Carolyn.
You know, maybe you shouldn't contact her for a while.
See how she likes it for once.
Abby: Just get drunk, go out with me tonight.
We'll flirt with other women.
Okay.
Or, we just go to breakfast.
We'll relax, get some coffee And then we'll stop by the shop and get Eileen's opinion on the way to the bar.
Eileen scares me.
- Too much woman for ya? - Absolutely! (laughs) This sucks Yeah.
This is why I don't have a girlfriend.
Sara: It's so stupid! Bacon will make you feel better.
- I love bacon.
- Abby: Me too.
I'm going to call her right now.
- Do what you need to do.
- What! No! Do not let me call her today.
Okay.
Geesh.
(keys jiggling coat zipper) Just breathe through your bacon is all I'm saying (door opening)