Immoral Compass (2021) s01e04 Episode Script
Part 4: Parenthood
1
So, parenthood, you know?
Very important job,
from what I've heard.
Not like I ever did it.
If I ever were to do it, I
wouldn't started it with that lie.
That's one of the
dumbest things ever.
You gotta build trust with your
kids and you start it off by telling them
there's a giant bunny that's
gonna bring chocolate eggs.
There's some fairy
that wants their teeth.
What kind of way is that
to start a relationship?
With three, four lies
right out the gate?
I remember that
when I was a kid,
my parents finally told me
there was no Santa Claus,
it's like, I fucking knew it.
I've been asking
you since I was six.
There's Santa Claus,
and he's gonna bring you
your fucking big wheel, right?
You're doing this great thing
for your kid.
While you're lying to them
at the same time,
and you know, eventually,
those two roads are gonna cross
and then
he's gonna become a teenager.
He ain't fucking
listening to you.
Don't do meth. It's bad for you.
"Oh, yeah? What else are
you going to tell me?
There's some fucking guy
coming down the chimney?
There's some giant bunny with
chocolate eggs, you asshole?
I'm not listening to you."
I think it's a conspiracy
by the government.
It drives a wedge
between you and your kids
and next thing you know, they
want to join the fucking army.
[synth rock instrumental]
[distant footsteps]
[door creaking]
[ominous music]
♪
[floorboards creaking]
[woman groaning]
Sh. It's bedtime.
Please
Let me go.
[footsteps]
Sh.
♪
[footsteps]
[whimsical music]
♪
You know what? Parenting,
it's definitely a, you know,
it's not for everybody.
Your dad's just like,
"Hey, how was I as a father?"
You gotta be like, "You know,
you really weren't there, were you?"
Dad, you fucking sucked.
OK? How many angry lunatic kids
do you have to have
before you look at yourself and
maybe you think you did something,
"Maybe I should've, you know
Brought so much tension."
I mean, you were good
at fucking my mom and making me,
but you know, after that
you kinda dropped the ball.
It's probably
why he drank too much in life.
[crickets chirping]
[car engine stalling]
[car engine stuttering]
[tense music]
♪
Need any help?
All right.
Let's give it another shot.
[car engine rumbling]
[baby crying]
Uh, miss?
Are you sure
you really want to do this?
He deserves
to be with his family.
You're right. You're right.
[car door beeping]
[car whirring]
[babies crying]
[tires screeching]
Go, go!
[car whirring]
So, parenthood, you know?
Very important job,
from what I've heard.
Not like I ever did it.
If I ever were to do it, I
wouldn't started it with that lie.
That's one of the
dumbest things ever.
You gotta build trust with your
kids and you start it off by telling them
there's a giant bunny that's
gonna bring chocolate eggs.
There's some fairy
that wants their teeth.
What kind of way is that
to start a relationship?
With three, four lies
right out the gate?
I remember that
when I was a kid,
my parents finally told me
there was no Santa Claus,
it's like, I fucking knew it.
I've been asking
you since I was six.
There's Santa Claus,
and he's gonna bring you
your fucking big wheel, right?
You're doing this great thing
for your kid.
While you're lying to them
at the same time,
and you know, eventually,
those two roads are gonna cross
and then
he's gonna become a teenager.
He ain't fucking
listening to you.
Don't do meth. It's bad for you.
"Oh, yeah? What else are
you going to tell me?
There's some fucking guy
coming down the chimney?
There's some giant bunny with
chocolate eggs, you asshole?
I'm not listening to you."
I think it's a conspiracy
by the government.
It drives a wedge
between you and your kids
and next thing you know, they
want to join the fucking army.
[synth rock instrumental]
[distant footsteps]
[door creaking]
[ominous music]
♪
[floorboards creaking]
[woman groaning]
Sh. It's bedtime.
Please
Let me go.
[footsteps]
Sh.
♪
[footsteps]
[whimsical music]
♪
You know what? Parenting,
it's definitely a, you know,
it's not for everybody.
Your dad's just like,
"Hey, how was I as a father?"
You gotta be like, "You know,
you really weren't there, were you?"
Dad, you fucking sucked.
OK? How many angry lunatic kids
do you have to have
before you look at yourself and
maybe you think you did something,
"Maybe I should've, you know
Brought so much tension."
I mean, you were good
at fucking my mom and making me,
but you know, after that
you kinda dropped the ball.
It's probably
why he drank too much in life.
[crickets chirping]
[car engine stalling]
[car engine stuttering]
[tense music]
♪
Need any help?
All right.
Let's give it another shot.
[car engine rumbling]
[baby crying]
Uh, miss?
Are you sure
you really want to do this?
He deserves
to be with his family.
You're right. You're right.
[car door beeping]
[car whirring]
[babies crying]
[tires screeching]
Go, go!
[car whirring]