Kolchak: The Night Stalker (1974) s01e04 Episode Script
The Vampire
They were tearing up an old road to lay more freeway a few miles south of Las Vegas.
The State of Nevada's Department of Highway's digging would be a help to thousands of motorists, but to one other person, it would turn out to be a nightmare.
May 2, 8:15 p.
m.
Airline stewardess Elena Munoz missed the detour sign and blew a steel-belted radial on a jagged rock.
She cursed the power of advertising.
She had no idea how cursed her evening really was.
When Miss Munoz returned with sheriff's deputies, they found nothing.
Just excavated earth.
Elena Munoz's name was placed on the crank list.
In Chicago, it was the hottest, muggiest spring anyone could remember.
An old reporter buddy of mine from Las Vegas had stopped in to collect an old debt from me.
I paid off, and Jim "The Swede'"Brytoski, now known as James Bright and moving up in the world, told me something that made me forget the hot weather.
Three deaths so far, and that's the way the police out there are handling it.
Yeah, all the careful words that aren't really words and the blank stares, yeah, I know.
The lid is on the pot, but you can sure smell something cooking.
All in Vegas? No, no, no.
West.
Erie, Goodsprings.
Has anyone seen the assignment roster? On the way to Los Angeles.
Oh, yeah.
The word around the coroner's office is that all of these bodies were missing an inordinate amount of blood.
If I didn't have thatjob as an anchorman in Cincinnati, I would follow this right- What do you mean, "an inordinate amount of blood"? Pardon me.
I just heard you mention you're an anchorman? I don't want to be nosy, but that pays very well, doesn't it? Yeah, well, you are being nosy, Uptight.
Now, fade, will ya? What about the blood, the murders? Are your sources reliable? Very.
They tell me- I thought you told me on the phone that Vincenzo was gonna take a long lunch hour.
I did.
He was.
Now, what about the story? - Is there a back way out of here? - Yeah, down the fire stairs, but-James! See you later, Carl, and take my advice.
Get yourself a haircut, a new suit of clothes and move up to TV news.
It's the only way to fly.
Ciao, Carl.
But, James! Where'd he go? I wanted to talk to him more about television.
Was that Swede Brytoski I just saw heading out of here? Who? Swede Brytoski.
Ah, it was one of my sources.
A very secretive guy.
Oh, sure looked like Swede.
He still owes me 500 bucks from Vegas.
Really? Uh, Mr.
Vincenzo.
This just came in over the wire.
New York wants somebody from this office to go to Los Angeles.
Why? What for? To do a piece on Amerta Mera.
The 15-year-old guru.
Guru? My budget doesn't allow for junkets all over the country on a whim.
A whim? This is something big.
He is getting married.
Who do they think I am, theJob Corps? I'm understaffed enough as it is.
It's a major financial undertaking to replace a lightbulb around here.
You think we're having trouble with this, Mr.
Vincenzo.
All four of the reporters in the Los Angeles office were in an accident.
Their station wagon overturned, and they're in the hospital.
I could go.
I'm not that busy.
- Carl.
- Oh, no, not me, Tony.
No, no, no.
I'm in it up to my eyeballs right here.
Carl, do you mind if I make the decisions on the utilization of manpower around here? Whatever you say, Tony.
I have read a few articles on transcendental meditation, and I feel I could handle the story pretty well.
Uh, what books have you read, Ron? The, uh, Murti book? The Harris and Lopato work? The, uh, A Sense of Selfby Sidney Uvandi? Just the Murti book and some articles.
I don't know the others.
Uh-huh.
Well, the Murti book is fine, Tony.
It's just fine.
It'll give him enough information and knowledge to write the story.
Superficial, but enough.
Carl, I want you to go.
Mr.
Vincenzo, don't you see what he- - No.
Now, wait a minute, Tony.
- There is no time for discussion.
According to this, the interview's already been set up with Amerta Mera.
I want you on that plane today.
Not me.
I'm not going out, and that's that.
You are going out to Los Angeles.
You're going to give the story your best efforts, - and you're going to keep me posted while you're out there.
- Tony! That is it, Carl! I'm sorry, Ron.
Sorry, Ron.
May 6, 11:15 p.
m.
Los Angeles's fabled Sunset Strip.
While I was dozing on a cross-country flight, Catherine Rawlins, 25, was stopped on the street by someone she hadn't seen in three years.
A lot had changed in three years.
A whole lot.
The same night, 12:30 a.
m.
Linda Courtner returned home early with a splitting headache to the apartment she shared.
The pain of Linda's headache was nothing compared to the agony she experienced before she died.
Can I get a doorman here? Uh- I'll pick my car up later.
There's three radio stations here and the rest is TV, sir.
Yeah, sure.
Whatever.
Thank you very much.
Thank you.
Yeah, operator.
I'd like to call my mother, please.
Person-to-person.
Mr.
Antonio Vincenzo.
Yeah, area code 312-555-8842.
It is believed that Mitchell fell asleep in the auto and then succumbed to the high desert temperatures, which sometimes reach 125at midday.
In Barstow, deputies stated, Mitchell's body was in a severely dehydrated- Operator, cancel that call.
vital fluids all but gone.
Turning to business news, the stock market opened higher today.
Listen, tell me, uh- Tell me, Mr.
- Mr.
Sample, what time does the coroner think that Mr.
Mitchell died? Oh, I'd say about 5:00, 5:30 a.
m.
I think he lost consciousness way before then.
Beautiful country you got up here.
Just gorgeous.
Gorgeous country.
Fresh, clean air, bright sunshine.
Yes, it's very beautiful.
It is indeed.
Tell me, what time does the sun come up around here? In the morning, early.
Oh, I know that! What time, about 5:00, 5:30? Well, it depends on the season.
Why would you want to know that? Because I think that's about the time that Mr.
Mitchell was murdered.
You been chewing mescal? Who said he was murdered? I say he died of exposure.
You know, Mitchell done stole that car in Vegas.
Then he decided to repaint it, and that's why he taped the windows.
Where did he repaint it, huh? On the inside? I mean, that's where the windows are taped.
On the inside.
You're one of them fellows who likes to hear himself talk, ain't you? Tell me, did Mr.
Mitchell have a couple of puncture marks on his throat, like fang marks? The last nosy fellow who come through Barstow, somebody done come out and punctured all his tires.
Is that a fact? Yes, he did.
Thank you very much for your advice, Mr.
Sample.
It's been a pleasure meeting you and your dog.
My trip had been very illuminating, but unless I had something to show on Amerta Mera and transcendental meditation, Vincenzo would do some serious meditating on having me fired.
Of course, if this is too small for you, you might look at the Basil Rathbone- Excuse me.
You're late.
We were expecting the termite inspection this morning.
Well, late I am, but termite inspector I'm not.
Although I have been known to bug a few people.
I'll be right with you.
It doesn't have a basement.
Basement? He's an oenophile.
It's up above the smog here.
He's a wine freak.
I have to have the right place for my Romanee Contis.
Yes, dear.
Well, why don't you look at the Rathbone? It's right down the road, and it is charming.
Well, I hope that he has a basement.
It's a dandy buy at 525,500.
It has, uh, eight bedrooms, four and a half baths.
All of the fireplaces are made out of Estruscan marble, and the floors are quarry tiled.
No, no, no.
Wait a minute.
I'm not looking for a house.
No, you don't have that buyer look.
No, I'm looking for Amerta Mera.
I think I missed him.
Indeed.
Oh, you must be Mr.
Chandra.
My name is, uh, Kolchak.
We had an appointment.
Yes, we did, and I told them that if you wish to speak with my most perfect master, you should be here by noon of today.
I was delayed.
Unavoidably delayed.
But I still must meet with Amerta Mera.
Just as your delay was unavoidable, so shall be your disappointment.
He has just gone to meet the faithful in Dallas.
When can I meet him again? In time, no doubt.
In time for my deadline? Thank you very much for everything, Faye.
Good-bye, Chandra.
Give my love to everyone.
Well, that's that.
They're not too concerned with earthly pressures, the daily grind.
They should meet my boss.
He'd turn Buddha into a chain-smoker.
Apparently, Mr.
Chandra doesn't find you too earthly.
Well, I'm friends with the whole inner circle.
You see, I sold Amerta Mera this house, and now I'm selling it over again.
Yeah.
Uh- My name is Carl Kolchak.
I'm with the I.
N.
S.
When are you bureaucrats gonna stop hounding that young man? He only came to this country to bring love and peace.
So what if his followers give him money freely? Is that any reason to keep badgering him? It's either you or it's the Immigration people or- Oh, no! Wait a minute.
No.
No.
I said I.
N.
S.
, not I.
R.
S.
Oh.
I.
N.
S.
Is a news service.
Independent News Service.
Oh! I never heard of it.
But isn't that something? You know, I took journalism at North Carolina State.
Then I was a reporter for a while with the Greensboro Republican.
Then I had a bad marriage, and it all ended.
Here I am.
My name is Faye Kruger.
Hello, Faye Kruger.
I was sent out here to get a story on transcendental meditation, but, uh, I'm not too much interested in the subject anyway.
Well, you should be.
It's fascinating.
I have had lots of talks with Amerta Mera about it while he was living here.
You did? Oh, sure.
He's fascinating.
Faye, how would you like to go back into journalism? I'll proof what you write, of course, and, uh, I'll correct any kind of mistakes you may make and send it on.
Then you sign my byline to it, send it on back to Chicago.
Sign your byline? Yeah, sure.
Oh, just at first, of course.
I mean, after they see how really good you are, why, I'll use every bit of influence I have on my boss to get you a job as a syndicated columnist.
He must be really high on you.
He's up in the ionosphere with me.
The bodies were discovered sometime this morning.
I'm trying to get a comment from LieutenantJack Matteo of the Los Angeles Police Department, but so far he's declined.
Apparently, they've already arrested some suspects in the case.
I just had word the police will hold a briefing for the press right here at the scene any minute.
Start writing right now, honey, 'cause you're about to become a journalist.
L- It's room 212.
Start without me.
Acting on tips furnished by police informants, we arrested the two suspects a few hours ago.
Oh, I'm terribly sorry, ma'am.
Now, these two- The door on the left.
Yes, I- Excuse me.
I'm late.
I'm sorry.
Thank you.
The two suspects both are admitted members of the Dark Star Coven, a group of Satan worshippers.
- Captain.
- Lieutenant.
- Lieutenant- - Matteo.
Lieutenant Matteo, how do you explain the loss of blood in the victims? That information has already been furnished and on the air, hasn't it? We're on to other things, Mr.
- You mean, by the suction device found in the possession of the suspects? Seems to me a thing like that would take a long time.
Oh, these people- Lieutenant, why didn't they just take the bodies with them and drain them in the safety of their home where you caught them? That makes sense.
Do you really believe that the suspects hung around the murder scene all that time? These people don't have much presence of mind.
They're deranged.
- Lieutenant, a question, please.
- Yes.
Do you feel that there's a connection between these murders and the ones in Erie and Barstow? Our department are looking into all leads.
If a connection is found, the news will be released - I mean, if it serves a purpose.
The murdered man was large, wasn't he? He was a former stuntman.
A former stuntman? Yeah.
Then the killer must have had immense strength in order to subdue a man like that.
Constantine Praxanos, one of our suspects, is 6'2" and weighs 250 pounds.
Uh, uh, uh- Is that strong enough for you, Mr.
- Wow.
He's a big guy.
Lieutenant, how do you spell that, please? P- R-A-X- Uh-Yeah.
Lieutenant? Lieutenant? There must have been quite a struggle, yet I see no evidence of that.
Now, Dr.
Kornbaum- - Kornbaum? Is that with a "K" or a "C," sir? - "K.
" Our police psychiatrist believes that these murders are ritual by nature.
Satan worshippers of the type we've arraigned often serve human blood during sabbats.
Blood! Blood.
Exactly, yes.
Uh, what marks were on the body, Lieutenant? Were there any marked bruises? Are they beaten or bruised? Lieutenant, where was the suction device attached? Yeah.
Where was it? We're withholding certain specific facts.
Oh, come on! Facts that only an involved party could verify.
Is there any truth to the rumor that the only marks on the body were two marks in the throat, like a vampire's? Vampire? First I've heard of that.
You-You with the hat.
Just what paper do you work for? Manchester Guardian.
Hi.
Oh, hi! Hey.
Did, uh, I get any calls from Vegas? Well, I don't know.
You told me not to answer the phone.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah, that's right.
Hello, operator? Yeah, I'd like to place a long-distance call to Las Vegas, please.
Area code 702-554-7726.
- Thank you.
How's the story coming? - Oh.
Oh, fine.
Just fine.
I read snatches of it to the, uh, room service waiter, and he really seemed intrigued.
When are you gonna proofread it? Just as soon as I'm finished with this.
Yeah.
Hello, Frank? How you coming with that missing persons list? Oh, Carl, do you spell "magically" with one "L" or two? Two, two.
Yeah.
How many? Eighty-seven people? Well, I guess you'd better- Yeah, wire me the list down here at the hotel, collect.
Yeah.
Yeah, thanks, Frank.
I owe you.
- It been doing that a lot? - Uh-huh.
Uh-huh.
Kolchak? Hello, operator? Hello.
Look, I could hear you a lot better if you took that submarine sandwich out of your mouth.
Uh, hello- Hello, Tony? Tony.
This is a real lousy connection.
How did the interview go with Amerta Mera? Oh, she did, huh? I said, Amerta Mera! Yeah, well, there's a little place down off the lobby down here.
It's, uh- It's called The Char-Pit.
It's real cheap, Tony.
The guru, Carl.
Did you get what we need? How did the interview go with the guru? Overcooked.
Yeah, the T-bone was lousy, but the chocolate mousse was passable.
You just get that story wired in and fast! And it better be a real jewel! Tony, listen, this hotel is awfully close to the airport.
There's another 747 coming over.
I can't- Hello? Hello? Good-bye! Carl, when you use "its," as in "ofttimes loses its own charm," do you put the apostrophe before or after the "S'"? Oft? Ofttimes? Balaban and Matteo, Unit 1-Baker-Nevada, checking out.
We're at 3200 Windsor Place.
We'll be away from the unit you gonna proofread this? Uh, why don't you proofread it and put it out on the wires, okay? You don't have anymore "ofts," do you? Or "narys" or "dost thous"? I never use "dost thou.
" Um, oh, I do have a "nary" in here though.
What's wrong with that? Well, it went out with "methinks.
" Lose the, uh, "nary" and the "ofts" and put it on the wire, okay? Okay.
Hollywood.
I was beginning to see they do things strangely there.
A detective lieutenant puts two suspects in jail and then goes back to the scene of the crime to do his investigation.
What can you expect from a city that erects a building to look like a stack offlapjacks and where some of the men dust their eyebrows with glitter? Compared to Tinseltown, Chicago was beginning to look like the Garden of Eden.
Hey.
- What's your name? - Uh, Carl Kolchak.
What are you doing here? I'm a reporter with the I.
N.
S.
In Chicago.
Yeah, well, we have enough homegrown reporters.
Your help is not needed.
I think you do need some help.
You got two suspects down in jail.
Yet here you are at the scene of the murder, fretting in this apartment that your department has gone over with a fine-tooth comb.
I'm a compulsive worrier, okay? If you're worried about those two warlocks you got in jail being innocent, I think you've got every right to worry.
Is that right? Yeah.
Why is that? The two victims that were killed in this apartment were killed for food by a vampire.
A real one! One of the reasons I went into police work is because I thought I'd meet all kinds of people.
You know, interesting people.
That's the truth.
But you're not interesting.
You're just idiotic.
No, I spoke to that deputy sheriff up in Barstow.
I asked him if there were puncture marks on the neck of the victims up there.
You know what he said? He denied it completely! Yet the truth was hanging out all over his face.
Come on.
You know and I know that Linda Courtner and her boyfriend here in this apartment- both had puncture marks on their throats.
If I knew that, I would have told the press.
Why are you having this fantasy? This is not a fantasy.
There's a pattern to these murders.
You know about the car up in Barstow.
From what I hear of it, it's grand theft auto.
Yeah, then you didn't hear enough.
The windows in that car were taped up with black paper on the inside to keep the sunlight from coming in.
I have one thing to tell you, Kolchak- I want you to get out of town.
I want you to get out of town today.
On your way home, you can drop off your vampire story in Transylvania.
This vampire didn't come from Transylvania.
It came from Las Vegas.
You put one word of that nonsense on a Teletype, and you're back in Windy City before you have a chance to pull your hat down tight! Forget the Teletype.
That's unimportant.
What is important is that you and everybody else in this city stop that vampire.
Kill it! The only way you're gonna find it is if you start treating it as a vampire.
Get out of here.
No, the only way you can kill it is that.
Listen to me, please.
This is very important.
Get out! Now, they have superhuman strength.
Will you- The only way you can hold it at bay is with a cross.
Now, you kill it by driving a stake through its- Get out.
You the manager? Yeah, and the painter.
And the plumber, and the gardener.
Did you know Linda Courtner? Hmm? You haven't been talking to reporters, have you? No.
Police gave me strict instructions.
I'm glad to see you're complying.
Carl Kolchak, I.
N.
S.
Oh.
Well, I'll be glad to help in any way I can.
That's good.
We'll be grateful for your cooperation.
There's a lot of female clothes missing from that apartment.
You have any idea who took 'em? Oh, not at all.
That's odd, isn't it? I mean, two men were- That's under investigation.
Oh.
Would you give us a list or description of those clothes and jewelry so we can put a search on 'em? She had an awful lot of clothes.
A lot of expensive things.
Expensive? I guess she needed them for her work.
What kind of work? Her hours were very bad.
She'd come in late, go out late.
Some kind of entertainment thing.
Hostessing or something.
Yeah? For whom? Grace's Catering Service.
That's the name of the firm, I believe.
That's right.
Grace's Catering Service.
That's right.
She was an entertainer, a performer? Yeah, I guess so.
My wife overheard her talking about doing some stunts.
Stunts.
Are you sure she didn't say "tricks"? Oh, the reason she made that mistake is because her sister went out of town to go into show business, and we naturally assumed- She went out of town and went into show business where? Las Vegas.
Las Vegas.
She was gonna be a showgirl, but then she disappeared, and Mrs.
Courtner was very upset.
Yes, her name- her name was- Catherine.
Catherine.
That's right.
Catherine Courtner.
No.
She never married, that I know of.
No, the family name was Stallings or Rawlings.
Rawlins! That was it! R- A-W- Hey, where you going? Did you tell him anything? No, I didn't tell him anything.
And he didn't know anything.
May 8, 8:10 p.
m.
Ichabod Grace, businessman, entrepreneur, was about to make an investment.
More of a takeover than a merger.
Ichabod's terms were fair, his pitch persuasive.
Ichabod thought he had added another filly to his stable of trotters.
In Ichabod's parlance, his new acquisition was called a "fox.
'" He had no way ofknowing she was actually more closely related to the bat.
I picked up the missing persons list from Las Vegas at the desk.
A Miss Catherine Rawlins was number 56 on the sheet.
She had been arrested a few times for prostitution.
Late in 1970, at the age of 25, she'd been listed as a missing person.
Two things were now clear- She was no longer missing, nor could she now be considered a person.
Hello? When I brushed my teeth this morning, Kolchak, you were still alive, but then I started shaving, and the whole world ended for you.
Tony? Is it Tony? I can't hear you, Tony! Turn the shaver off, Carl.
Now, where have you been, why the games, and why haven't you returned my calls? Well, I haven't been in the hotel room.
I've been working, and it's paying off.
Listen, there's more to this meditation thing than meets the eye.
I've been running down some interesting side roads, and I've gotten- It's really very interesting.
Is that right? Mmm.
I'd like to ask you a few questions about the Amerta Mera interview itself.
Could I call you back on that? No! Does Mera's mansion really have copper pipes throughout? - Copper pipes? - Yes, plumbing.
Plumbing! Uh-Well, yes, Tony.
Some of these old, uh- these old mansions, they do have, uh, copper pipes.
Fascinating.
And they also have "low-maintenance grounds, a Spanish tile roof and a separate adobe cabana"? Yeah, that's what it says, Tony.
Yeah, that's right.
I thought it was very interesting.
I thought I had my wires crossed with Better Homes and Gardens.
I didn't send you there to interview real estate.
Well, Tony, I thought it was a new angle, you see? However, if you'd like a rewrite, I'll have it on the way for you tomorrow.
Oh, you will have a rewrite on the way tomorrow, but if another story comes in looking like this, it will be the end.
You got it? Yeah, got it.
Got it.
Good! And, Carl? Yes? You can go on and finish your shave now.
He didn't like it, did he? He wants a rewrite.
No, no, no.
He was really very excited about it.
Yeah, he, uh- he doesn't want a rewrite, exactly.
He just wants a, uh, polish.
Then why was he shouting? Oh, listen.
Editors shout a lot.
You gotta get used to that.
Well, I'll look over my notes and see if I can tighten it up a little bit.
Yeah, listen, uh, I heard about a-a business named Grace's Catering Service, but, Faye, it's not listed here in the directory.
You, uh-You wouldn't have heard about it, would you? No, I don't think I have.
It's not listed under "Catering.
" Maybe it's under "Restaurants.
" "P.
" "R.
" That's it.
Restaurants.
"G" and Ninth.
Afternoon.
Grace's Catering Service.
Yeah, I'd like- I'd like to speak to Catherine Rawlins.
She's not in right now.
I could take a message.
Well, do you know where I could see her, where I could reach her? You could reach her through me.
That's about it.
I see.
Well, I'd like, uh- I'd like her to deliver something warm, if that's possible.
- That's what we're here for.
- Good.
Could she deliver it to my hotel room? Hold on a minute.
- Little after 8:00 okay? - No, no.
No.
Later.
How about after 4:00? No dice.
Well, okay.
Make it after 8:00.
All right.
Give me your room number, where you're at and your first name.
Sure.
Uh, 212.
The name is Tony.
Okay, friend.
You got yourself an appointment.
- Now, about the rewrite- - Yeah.
We'll get on that tomorrow.
Tomorrow? Mm-hmm.
But, look, I'm worried about your editor.
He expects the rewrite.
I was hoping you'd help me.
Sure, sure, sure.
Listen.
We'll do it tomorrow.
We'll just, uh-We'll get into it and do an absolutely fantastic job tomorrow.
Okay? Tomorrow.
Tomorrow.
Good-bye.
Oh, Faye.
Uh, could you lend me your lipstick? Is there something you'd like to talk about? I mean, maybe I could help you in some way.
We will! We will.
I'll tell you everything tomorrow.
I'll give you a full explanation, but right now could I just borrow your lipstick? Thank you very much.
Bye.
Who is it? Grace's Catering.
Door's open.
Come on in.
Tony? Come on in.
Back! All right.
Which freako scene is this? You're not Catherine Rawlins.
You're not Marcello Mastroianni, but you don't hear me crying about it.
Where's Catherine? Well, you're all flattery, aren't you, Father? No, no.
I didn't want her to come up here for, uh- for, uh- No, it's very important that I meet her.
Ichabod sent her off on another gig at the last minute.
What-What does that witch have that I don't? Believe me, baby, you would not want to know.
Now, who's Ichabod? Ichabod Grace, the main man.
My sugar mac.
Catherine's too.
Uh-huh.
And where do I find Catherine? Where does she live? Do you know? That creep doesn't talk to anybody.
I don't know anything about her except she uses four pounds of pancake and rouge on her face, and guys pay for that.
Well, she has to use it.
She's not well.
Aww.
Where do I find Ichabod? You're gonna find him hoppin' mad when he hears I came up here and didn't get paid.
Two hundred dollars, sweetcheeks.
Two hundred dollars? Welcome to Hollywood, sailor.
I don't have to answer questions like that about my business.
That's an invasion of the laissez-faire principle of free enterprise.
Yeah, Linda Courtner used to work for you, is that right? Maybe.
So what? Catherine Rawlins killed her.
You're nuts.
Why would she want to do a thing like that? Uh, well, Catherine Rawlins was Linda Courtner's sister, and she had reasons that even you wouldn't understand.
Sister? Yeah.
You are crazy.
I am? What has Catherine been wearing lately in the way of clothes? I'll bet my bottom dollar they all belong to Linda.
You know, maybe there is some kind of family resemblance.
I just never noticed it.
And that Catherine- She is weird.
You could be considered an accessory to a murder.
Now, where is she? Talk to my lawyer.
You talk to your lawyer.
You're withholding evidence in a killing.
Now, where is she? I sent her over to Stacker's pad.
Stacker? Stacker who? "Stacker who?" Don't you follow football, chum? Clayton "Stacker" Schumaker of the Los Angeles Rams.
Tackle Hugo Maltz and the famous Rams Godzilla Gang arrived at the home of Stacker Schumaker to give their amorous teammate what Maltz had called one hellacious surprise.
The surprise was all theirs.
It-It got- It got knocked in there during the fight.
Be careful! Careful, will you? Please, they might be good.
There.
Okay.
Oh, that's terrific.
That's just terrific.
Listen, these pictures would have shown - I know.
A woman.
Yeah.
A woman did all this, huh? Ask your men.
They chased her for three blocks.
Ask them what they saw.
All they saw is someone with long hair.
Could have been a guy from the Dark Star Coven.
They all have long hair.
Yeah.
Are they all built like Veronica Lake? Can they juggle the Godzilla Gang single-handedly, huh? Ever hear of karate, kung fu? Listen, what I saw was not kung fu, and it wasn't chow mein.
It was a female vampire.
I don't want to hear that word again! With superhuman strength.
But I don't have superhuman patience! What I do have is all used up.
Her name is Catherine Rawlins.
She's the sister of Linda Courtner.
She disappeared in Las Vegas after having been bitten by a vam- Thousands of people disappear! Is Amelia Earhart supposed to show up as a vampire? Uh-huh! Uh-huh! Ha-ha-ha! She was a high-priced hooker in Vegas.
She probably operates exactly the same way down here.
Go on.
Find her.
Look for her.
Kill her.
Use your resources.
Chicago, Lieutenant.
I'm gonna use my resources on you.
Collect, right? Collect.
Hello.
Mr.
Anthony Vincenzo? Yes.
Yes.
- Lieutenant Matteo, L.
A.
P.
D.
- Oh! It's Kolchak, isn't it? He was found on the scene of a multiple homicide.
He's a material witness, and if we want to, we can make him more than that.
Pretty soon the flak is gonna start flying back to Chicago.
Please, please, Lieutenant.
Uh, let me speak to him.
I don't want that word mentioned.
Hi, Tony.
I'm tired of it, Kolchak.
I am fed up! I've got a brother-in-law who's got a 14-year-old kid he's always bailing out of juvenile hall, but I've got you, and you are worse! Tony, they're just pressuring me, that's all.
What they're doing isn't even legal.
Whatever it is, you do it, Carl, or so help me, you haven't got a job here.
But, Tony, it was an absolutely remarkable thing: It's an incredible story.
I mean it, Carl! I'll fire you.
I won't have any choice.
You've lied, you've connived, you've weaseled, and you belong on the unemployment line! Tony, Tony, listen to me.
I was here in the flesh when it happened, when all the killings took place.
It was done by a female vamp- It was what? Are you there, Kolchak? It was what? It was a- Well, some say it was a couple of warlocks.
I don't know what you're talking about, and I don't care.
You just remember this - Whatever you do next, I.
N.
S.
Is not behind you.
I.
N.
S.
Is only behind a story on Amerta Mera, which, incidentally, I.
N.
S.
Better get, or you'll be waiting in line at Window "A"! I understand you, I.
N.
S.
Over and out.
Kolchak.
Kolchak! Oh, I'm sorry.
You want to speak to him? I'll say it to you.
Be on a plane by 6:00 this morning.
Well, I don't know if I can make that.
Then we'll carry you on and stuff you into a seat.
Balaban! Give Mr.
Kolchak a ride back to his hotel.
He's tired of the smog.
He wants to go home.
Oh, no, no, I like Los- If he won't get in the car, jam his tie in the door and drag him.
Oh, that's a sa- That's a dumb thing.
That's a silly thing to do.
Uh, Officer, do you have a wife and little ones at home? Hi.
Can I come in? Oh, yeah.
Sure.
Oh, here's your lipstick.
Thank you.
How'd you make out? Terrific.
You're not leaving now, are you? Well, it's either now or after 12 years in San Quentin.
Personally, I prefer now.
Carl, I sure hate to see you go.
You're in the minority.
We'll keep in touch.
Listen, what about the story? I've got some terrific ideas.
I know you're gonna love it.
I'll bet you have.
Write it.
Oh, no.
It's back to real estate for me.
No, no.
You keep on writing.
It'll take you a little time to get the hang of it, but- Real estate? Do companies out here rent as well as sell houses? Well, sure.
We've got a lot of them.
Yeah.
How would a - How would a person find out if a house had been rented or sold, uh, purchased or bought or leased in the last week or two? Well, I could look in multiple listings.
It covers every broker in town.
It'd take a while.
At your office? Yeah.
Where's your office? It turned out that Los Angeles has nearly as many real estate offices as it has traffic jams.
Poor Faye Kruger and I spent till we finally had some luck, if you can call it luck.
By the time Catherine Rawlins's house had been located, the sun had gone down, and if I waited for daylight, I'd find myself on an eastboundjet compliments of the police, and Catherine would be thousands of miles behind me, slumbering, waiting for the next in an endless number of dark, quiet nights.
The multiple listings had described Catherine's house as a baronial retreat.
It was actually a decayed, turn-of-the-century mansion awaiting to be replaced by a condominium, and it would appeal to a special type of client, someone unconcerned with earthly comforts.
And it was secluded.
Who would go near it? Only a vampire or some fool looking for her.
Get away! Yeah! Aah! Hey! Get away! Get away! Matteo had a detective tailing me, but he lost me about the time Catherine found me.
I wasn't particularly hard to find after that.
It was just a question of following the light.
I was told it could be seen from the Sunset Strip, West Los Angeles and Malibu.
It was a local landmark, so I had to pay for another one, and I didn't mind at all.
I just couldn't think of a way to get it on the expense account.
They booked me for murder, just like I thought they would, but then, after 12 hours, they let me go.
They never did say why, but as I was sitting in Lieutenant Matteo's office, waiting for execution, I happened to see a coroner's report on Catherine Rawlins.
I quote the coroner- "The tissue structure of the individual appeared to be that of a female, species: Human, "who had been dead at least three years.
This is a medical conundrum for which I have no explanation.
" Three years.
The State of Nevada's Department of Highway's digging would be a help to thousands of motorists, but to one other person, it would turn out to be a nightmare.
May 2, 8:15 p.
m.
Airline stewardess Elena Munoz missed the detour sign and blew a steel-belted radial on a jagged rock.
She cursed the power of advertising.
She had no idea how cursed her evening really was.
When Miss Munoz returned with sheriff's deputies, they found nothing.
Just excavated earth.
Elena Munoz's name was placed on the crank list.
In Chicago, it was the hottest, muggiest spring anyone could remember.
An old reporter buddy of mine from Las Vegas had stopped in to collect an old debt from me.
I paid off, and Jim "The Swede'"Brytoski, now known as James Bright and moving up in the world, told me something that made me forget the hot weather.
Three deaths so far, and that's the way the police out there are handling it.
Yeah, all the careful words that aren't really words and the blank stares, yeah, I know.
The lid is on the pot, but you can sure smell something cooking.
All in Vegas? No, no, no.
West.
Erie, Goodsprings.
Has anyone seen the assignment roster? On the way to Los Angeles.
Oh, yeah.
The word around the coroner's office is that all of these bodies were missing an inordinate amount of blood.
If I didn't have thatjob as an anchorman in Cincinnati, I would follow this right- What do you mean, "an inordinate amount of blood"? Pardon me.
I just heard you mention you're an anchorman? I don't want to be nosy, but that pays very well, doesn't it? Yeah, well, you are being nosy, Uptight.
Now, fade, will ya? What about the blood, the murders? Are your sources reliable? Very.
They tell me- I thought you told me on the phone that Vincenzo was gonna take a long lunch hour.
I did.
He was.
Now, what about the story? - Is there a back way out of here? - Yeah, down the fire stairs, but-James! See you later, Carl, and take my advice.
Get yourself a haircut, a new suit of clothes and move up to TV news.
It's the only way to fly.
Ciao, Carl.
But, James! Where'd he go? I wanted to talk to him more about television.
Was that Swede Brytoski I just saw heading out of here? Who? Swede Brytoski.
Ah, it was one of my sources.
A very secretive guy.
Oh, sure looked like Swede.
He still owes me 500 bucks from Vegas.
Really? Uh, Mr.
Vincenzo.
This just came in over the wire.
New York wants somebody from this office to go to Los Angeles.
Why? What for? To do a piece on Amerta Mera.
The 15-year-old guru.
Guru? My budget doesn't allow for junkets all over the country on a whim.
A whim? This is something big.
He is getting married.
Who do they think I am, theJob Corps? I'm understaffed enough as it is.
It's a major financial undertaking to replace a lightbulb around here.
You think we're having trouble with this, Mr.
Vincenzo.
All four of the reporters in the Los Angeles office were in an accident.
Their station wagon overturned, and they're in the hospital.
I could go.
I'm not that busy.
- Carl.
- Oh, no, not me, Tony.
No, no, no.
I'm in it up to my eyeballs right here.
Carl, do you mind if I make the decisions on the utilization of manpower around here? Whatever you say, Tony.
I have read a few articles on transcendental meditation, and I feel I could handle the story pretty well.
Uh, what books have you read, Ron? The, uh, Murti book? The Harris and Lopato work? The, uh, A Sense of Selfby Sidney Uvandi? Just the Murti book and some articles.
I don't know the others.
Uh-huh.
Well, the Murti book is fine, Tony.
It's just fine.
It'll give him enough information and knowledge to write the story.
Superficial, but enough.
Carl, I want you to go.
Mr.
Vincenzo, don't you see what he- - No.
Now, wait a minute, Tony.
- There is no time for discussion.
According to this, the interview's already been set up with Amerta Mera.
I want you on that plane today.
Not me.
I'm not going out, and that's that.
You are going out to Los Angeles.
You're going to give the story your best efforts, - and you're going to keep me posted while you're out there.
- Tony! That is it, Carl! I'm sorry, Ron.
Sorry, Ron.
May 6, 11:15 p.
m.
Los Angeles's fabled Sunset Strip.
While I was dozing on a cross-country flight, Catherine Rawlins, 25, was stopped on the street by someone she hadn't seen in three years.
A lot had changed in three years.
A whole lot.
The same night, 12:30 a.
m.
Linda Courtner returned home early with a splitting headache to the apartment she shared.
The pain of Linda's headache was nothing compared to the agony she experienced before she died.
Can I get a doorman here? Uh- I'll pick my car up later.
There's three radio stations here and the rest is TV, sir.
Yeah, sure.
Whatever.
Thank you very much.
Thank you.
Yeah, operator.
I'd like to call my mother, please.
Person-to-person.
Mr.
Antonio Vincenzo.
Yeah, area code 312-555-8842.
It is believed that Mitchell fell asleep in the auto and then succumbed to the high desert temperatures, which sometimes reach 125at midday.
In Barstow, deputies stated, Mitchell's body was in a severely dehydrated- Operator, cancel that call.
vital fluids all but gone.
Turning to business news, the stock market opened higher today.
Listen, tell me, uh- Tell me, Mr.
- Mr.
Sample, what time does the coroner think that Mr.
Mitchell died? Oh, I'd say about 5:00, 5:30 a.
m.
I think he lost consciousness way before then.
Beautiful country you got up here.
Just gorgeous.
Gorgeous country.
Fresh, clean air, bright sunshine.
Yes, it's very beautiful.
It is indeed.
Tell me, what time does the sun come up around here? In the morning, early.
Oh, I know that! What time, about 5:00, 5:30? Well, it depends on the season.
Why would you want to know that? Because I think that's about the time that Mr.
Mitchell was murdered.
You been chewing mescal? Who said he was murdered? I say he died of exposure.
You know, Mitchell done stole that car in Vegas.
Then he decided to repaint it, and that's why he taped the windows.
Where did he repaint it, huh? On the inside? I mean, that's where the windows are taped.
On the inside.
You're one of them fellows who likes to hear himself talk, ain't you? Tell me, did Mr.
Mitchell have a couple of puncture marks on his throat, like fang marks? The last nosy fellow who come through Barstow, somebody done come out and punctured all his tires.
Is that a fact? Yes, he did.
Thank you very much for your advice, Mr.
Sample.
It's been a pleasure meeting you and your dog.
My trip had been very illuminating, but unless I had something to show on Amerta Mera and transcendental meditation, Vincenzo would do some serious meditating on having me fired.
Of course, if this is too small for you, you might look at the Basil Rathbone- Excuse me.
You're late.
We were expecting the termite inspection this morning.
Well, late I am, but termite inspector I'm not.
Although I have been known to bug a few people.
I'll be right with you.
It doesn't have a basement.
Basement? He's an oenophile.
It's up above the smog here.
He's a wine freak.
I have to have the right place for my Romanee Contis.
Yes, dear.
Well, why don't you look at the Rathbone? It's right down the road, and it is charming.
Well, I hope that he has a basement.
It's a dandy buy at 525,500.
It has, uh, eight bedrooms, four and a half baths.
All of the fireplaces are made out of Estruscan marble, and the floors are quarry tiled.
No, no, no.
Wait a minute.
I'm not looking for a house.
No, you don't have that buyer look.
No, I'm looking for Amerta Mera.
I think I missed him.
Indeed.
Oh, you must be Mr.
Chandra.
My name is, uh, Kolchak.
We had an appointment.
Yes, we did, and I told them that if you wish to speak with my most perfect master, you should be here by noon of today.
I was delayed.
Unavoidably delayed.
But I still must meet with Amerta Mera.
Just as your delay was unavoidable, so shall be your disappointment.
He has just gone to meet the faithful in Dallas.
When can I meet him again? In time, no doubt.
In time for my deadline? Thank you very much for everything, Faye.
Good-bye, Chandra.
Give my love to everyone.
Well, that's that.
They're not too concerned with earthly pressures, the daily grind.
They should meet my boss.
He'd turn Buddha into a chain-smoker.
Apparently, Mr.
Chandra doesn't find you too earthly.
Well, I'm friends with the whole inner circle.
You see, I sold Amerta Mera this house, and now I'm selling it over again.
Yeah.
Uh- My name is Carl Kolchak.
I'm with the I.
N.
S.
When are you bureaucrats gonna stop hounding that young man? He only came to this country to bring love and peace.
So what if his followers give him money freely? Is that any reason to keep badgering him? It's either you or it's the Immigration people or- Oh, no! Wait a minute.
No.
No.
I said I.
N.
S.
, not I.
R.
S.
Oh.
I.
N.
S.
Is a news service.
Independent News Service.
Oh! I never heard of it.
But isn't that something? You know, I took journalism at North Carolina State.
Then I was a reporter for a while with the Greensboro Republican.
Then I had a bad marriage, and it all ended.
Here I am.
My name is Faye Kruger.
Hello, Faye Kruger.
I was sent out here to get a story on transcendental meditation, but, uh, I'm not too much interested in the subject anyway.
Well, you should be.
It's fascinating.
I have had lots of talks with Amerta Mera about it while he was living here.
You did? Oh, sure.
He's fascinating.
Faye, how would you like to go back into journalism? I'll proof what you write, of course, and, uh, I'll correct any kind of mistakes you may make and send it on.
Then you sign my byline to it, send it on back to Chicago.
Sign your byline? Yeah, sure.
Oh, just at first, of course.
I mean, after they see how really good you are, why, I'll use every bit of influence I have on my boss to get you a job as a syndicated columnist.
He must be really high on you.
He's up in the ionosphere with me.
The bodies were discovered sometime this morning.
I'm trying to get a comment from LieutenantJack Matteo of the Los Angeles Police Department, but so far he's declined.
Apparently, they've already arrested some suspects in the case.
I just had word the police will hold a briefing for the press right here at the scene any minute.
Start writing right now, honey, 'cause you're about to become a journalist.
L- It's room 212.
Start without me.
Acting on tips furnished by police informants, we arrested the two suspects a few hours ago.
Oh, I'm terribly sorry, ma'am.
Now, these two- The door on the left.
Yes, I- Excuse me.
I'm late.
I'm sorry.
Thank you.
The two suspects both are admitted members of the Dark Star Coven, a group of Satan worshippers.
- Captain.
- Lieutenant.
- Lieutenant- - Matteo.
Lieutenant Matteo, how do you explain the loss of blood in the victims? That information has already been furnished and on the air, hasn't it? We're on to other things, Mr.
- You mean, by the suction device found in the possession of the suspects? Seems to me a thing like that would take a long time.
Oh, these people- Lieutenant, why didn't they just take the bodies with them and drain them in the safety of their home where you caught them? That makes sense.
Do you really believe that the suspects hung around the murder scene all that time? These people don't have much presence of mind.
They're deranged.
- Lieutenant, a question, please.
- Yes.
Do you feel that there's a connection between these murders and the ones in Erie and Barstow? Our department are looking into all leads.
If a connection is found, the news will be released - I mean, if it serves a purpose.
The murdered man was large, wasn't he? He was a former stuntman.
A former stuntman? Yeah.
Then the killer must have had immense strength in order to subdue a man like that.
Constantine Praxanos, one of our suspects, is 6'2" and weighs 250 pounds.
Uh, uh, uh- Is that strong enough for you, Mr.
- Wow.
He's a big guy.
Lieutenant, how do you spell that, please? P- R-A-X- Uh-Yeah.
Lieutenant? Lieutenant? There must have been quite a struggle, yet I see no evidence of that.
Now, Dr.
Kornbaum- - Kornbaum? Is that with a "K" or a "C," sir? - "K.
" Our police psychiatrist believes that these murders are ritual by nature.
Satan worshippers of the type we've arraigned often serve human blood during sabbats.
Blood! Blood.
Exactly, yes.
Uh, what marks were on the body, Lieutenant? Were there any marked bruises? Are they beaten or bruised? Lieutenant, where was the suction device attached? Yeah.
Where was it? We're withholding certain specific facts.
Oh, come on! Facts that only an involved party could verify.
Is there any truth to the rumor that the only marks on the body were two marks in the throat, like a vampire's? Vampire? First I've heard of that.
You-You with the hat.
Just what paper do you work for? Manchester Guardian.
Hi.
Oh, hi! Hey.
Did, uh, I get any calls from Vegas? Well, I don't know.
You told me not to answer the phone.
Oh, yeah.
Yeah, that's right.
Hello, operator? Yeah, I'd like to place a long-distance call to Las Vegas, please.
Area code 702-554-7726.
- Thank you.
How's the story coming? - Oh.
Oh, fine.
Just fine.
I read snatches of it to the, uh, room service waiter, and he really seemed intrigued.
When are you gonna proofread it? Just as soon as I'm finished with this.
Yeah.
Hello, Frank? How you coming with that missing persons list? Oh, Carl, do you spell "magically" with one "L" or two? Two, two.
Yeah.
How many? Eighty-seven people? Well, I guess you'd better- Yeah, wire me the list down here at the hotel, collect.
Yeah.
Yeah, thanks, Frank.
I owe you.
- It been doing that a lot? - Uh-huh.
Uh-huh.
Kolchak? Hello, operator? Hello.
Look, I could hear you a lot better if you took that submarine sandwich out of your mouth.
Uh, hello- Hello, Tony? Tony.
This is a real lousy connection.
How did the interview go with Amerta Mera? Oh, she did, huh? I said, Amerta Mera! Yeah, well, there's a little place down off the lobby down here.
It's, uh- It's called The Char-Pit.
It's real cheap, Tony.
The guru, Carl.
Did you get what we need? How did the interview go with the guru? Overcooked.
Yeah, the T-bone was lousy, but the chocolate mousse was passable.
You just get that story wired in and fast! And it better be a real jewel! Tony, listen, this hotel is awfully close to the airport.
There's another 747 coming over.
I can't- Hello? Hello? Good-bye! Carl, when you use "its," as in "ofttimes loses its own charm," do you put the apostrophe before or after the "S'"? Oft? Ofttimes? Balaban and Matteo, Unit 1-Baker-Nevada, checking out.
We're at 3200 Windsor Place.
We'll be away from the unit you gonna proofread this? Uh, why don't you proofread it and put it out on the wires, okay? You don't have anymore "ofts," do you? Or "narys" or "dost thous"? I never use "dost thou.
" Um, oh, I do have a "nary" in here though.
What's wrong with that? Well, it went out with "methinks.
" Lose the, uh, "nary" and the "ofts" and put it on the wire, okay? Okay.
Hollywood.
I was beginning to see they do things strangely there.
A detective lieutenant puts two suspects in jail and then goes back to the scene of the crime to do his investigation.
What can you expect from a city that erects a building to look like a stack offlapjacks and where some of the men dust their eyebrows with glitter? Compared to Tinseltown, Chicago was beginning to look like the Garden of Eden.
Hey.
- What's your name? - Uh, Carl Kolchak.
What are you doing here? I'm a reporter with the I.
N.
S.
In Chicago.
Yeah, well, we have enough homegrown reporters.
Your help is not needed.
I think you do need some help.
You got two suspects down in jail.
Yet here you are at the scene of the murder, fretting in this apartment that your department has gone over with a fine-tooth comb.
I'm a compulsive worrier, okay? If you're worried about those two warlocks you got in jail being innocent, I think you've got every right to worry.
Is that right? Yeah.
Why is that? The two victims that were killed in this apartment were killed for food by a vampire.
A real one! One of the reasons I went into police work is because I thought I'd meet all kinds of people.
You know, interesting people.
That's the truth.
But you're not interesting.
You're just idiotic.
No, I spoke to that deputy sheriff up in Barstow.
I asked him if there were puncture marks on the neck of the victims up there.
You know what he said? He denied it completely! Yet the truth was hanging out all over his face.
Come on.
You know and I know that Linda Courtner and her boyfriend here in this apartment- both had puncture marks on their throats.
If I knew that, I would have told the press.
Why are you having this fantasy? This is not a fantasy.
There's a pattern to these murders.
You know about the car up in Barstow.
From what I hear of it, it's grand theft auto.
Yeah, then you didn't hear enough.
The windows in that car were taped up with black paper on the inside to keep the sunlight from coming in.
I have one thing to tell you, Kolchak- I want you to get out of town.
I want you to get out of town today.
On your way home, you can drop off your vampire story in Transylvania.
This vampire didn't come from Transylvania.
It came from Las Vegas.
You put one word of that nonsense on a Teletype, and you're back in Windy City before you have a chance to pull your hat down tight! Forget the Teletype.
That's unimportant.
What is important is that you and everybody else in this city stop that vampire.
Kill it! The only way you're gonna find it is if you start treating it as a vampire.
Get out of here.
No, the only way you can kill it is that.
Listen to me, please.
This is very important.
Get out! Now, they have superhuman strength.
Will you- The only way you can hold it at bay is with a cross.
Now, you kill it by driving a stake through its- Get out.
You the manager? Yeah, and the painter.
And the plumber, and the gardener.
Did you know Linda Courtner? Hmm? You haven't been talking to reporters, have you? No.
Police gave me strict instructions.
I'm glad to see you're complying.
Carl Kolchak, I.
N.
S.
Oh.
Well, I'll be glad to help in any way I can.
That's good.
We'll be grateful for your cooperation.
There's a lot of female clothes missing from that apartment.
You have any idea who took 'em? Oh, not at all.
That's odd, isn't it? I mean, two men were- That's under investigation.
Oh.
Would you give us a list or description of those clothes and jewelry so we can put a search on 'em? She had an awful lot of clothes.
A lot of expensive things.
Expensive? I guess she needed them for her work.
What kind of work? Her hours were very bad.
She'd come in late, go out late.
Some kind of entertainment thing.
Hostessing or something.
Yeah? For whom? Grace's Catering Service.
That's the name of the firm, I believe.
That's right.
Grace's Catering Service.
That's right.
She was an entertainer, a performer? Yeah, I guess so.
My wife overheard her talking about doing some stunts.
Stunts.
Are you sure she didn't say "tricks"? Oh, the reason she made that mistake is because her sister went out of town to go into show business, and we naturally assumed- She went out of town and went into show business where? Las Vegas.
Las Vegas.
She was gonna be a showgirl, but then she disappeared, and Mrs.
Courtner was very upset.
Yes, her name- her name was- Catherine.
Catherine.
That's right.
Catherine Courtner.
No.
She never married, that I know of.
No, the family name was Stallings or Rawlings.
Rawlins! That was it! R- A-W- Hey, where you going? Did you tell him anything? No, I didn't tell him anything.
And he didn't know anything.
May 8, 8:10 p.
m.
Ichabod Grace, businessman, entrepreneur, was about to make an investment.
More of a takeover than a merger.
Ichabod's terms were fair, his pitch persuasive.
Ichabod thought he had added another filly to his stable of trotters.
In Ichabod's parlance, his new acquisition was called a "fox.
'" He had no way ofknowing she was actually more closely related to the bat.
I picked up the missing persons list from Las Vegas at the desk.
A Miss Catherine Rawlins was number 56 on the sheet.
She had been arrested a few times for prostitution.
Late in 1970, at the age of 25, she'd been listed as a missing person.
Two things were now clear- She was no longer missing, nor could she now be considered a person.
Hello? When I brushed my teeth this morning, Kolchak, you were still alive, but then I started shaving, and the whole world ended for you.
Tony? Is it Tony? I can't hear you, Tony! Turn the shaver off, Carl.
Now, where have you been, why the games, and why haven't you returned my calls? Well, I haven't been in the hotel room.
I've been working, and it's paying off.
Listen, there's more to this meditation thing than meets the eye.
I've been running down some interesting side roads, and I've gotten- It's really very interesting.
Is that right? Mmm.
I'd like to ask you a few questions about the Amerta Mera interview itself.
Could I call you back on that? No! Does Mera's mansion really have copper pipes throughout? - Copper pipes? - Yes, plumbing.
Plumbing! Uh-Well, yes, Tony.
Some of these old, uh- these old mansions, they do have, uh, copper pipes.
Fascinating.
And they also have "low-maintenance grounds, a Spanish tile roof and a separate adobe cabana"? Yeah, that's what it says, Tony.
Yeah, that's right.
I thought it was very interesting.
I thought I had my wires crossed with Better Homes and Gardens.
I didn't send you there to interview real estate.
Well, Tony, I thought it was a new angle, you see? However, if you'd like a rewrite, I'll have it on the way for you tomorrow.
Oh, you will have a rewrite on the way tomorrow, but if another story comes in looking like this, it will be the end.
You got it? Yeah, got it.
Got it.
Good! And, Carl? Yes? You can go on and finish your shave now.
He didn't like it, did he? He wants a rewrite.
No, no, no.
He was really very excited about it.
Yeah, he, uh- he doesn't want a rewrite, exactly.
He just wants a, uh, polish.
Then why was he shouting? Oh, listen.
Editors shout a lot.
You gotta get used to that.
Well, I'll look over my notes and see if I can tighten it up a little bit.
Yeah, listen, uh, I heard about a-a business named Grace's Catering Service, but, Faye, it's not listed here in the directory.
You, uh-You wouldn't have heard about it, would you? No, I don't think I have.
It's not listed under "Catering.
" Maybe it's under "Restaurants.
" "P.
" "R.
" That's it.
Restaurants.
"G" and Ninth.
Afternoon.
Grace's Catering Service.
Yeah, I'd like- I'd like to speak to Catherine Rawlins.
She's not in right now.
I could take a message.
Well, do you know where I could see her, where I could reach her? You could reach her through me.
That's about it.
I see.
Well, I'd like, uh- I'd like her to deliver something warm, if that's possible.
- That's what we're here for.
- Good.
Could she deliver it to my hotel room? Hold on a minute.
- Little after 8:00 okay? - No, no.
No.
Later.
How about after 4:00? No dice.
Well, okay.
Make it after 8:00.
All right.
Give me your room number, where you're at and your first name.
Sure.
Uh, 212.
The name is Tony.
Okay, friend.
You got yourself an appointment.
- Now, about the rewrite- - Yeah.
We'll get on that tomorrow.
Tomorrow? Mm-hmm.
But, look, I'm worried about your editor.
He expects the rewrite.
I was hoping you'd help me.
Sure, sure, sure.
Listen.
We'll do it tomorrow.
We'll just, uh-We'll get into it and do an absolutely fantastic job tomorrow.
Okay? Tomorrow.
Tomorrow.
Good-bye.
Oh, Faye.
Uh, could you lend me your lipstick? Is there something you'd like to talk about? I mean, maybe I could help you in some way.
We will! We will.
I'll tell you everything tomorrow.
I'll give you a full explanation, but right now could I just borrow your lipstick? Thank you very much.
Bye.
Who is it? Grace's Catering.
Door's open.
Come on in.
Tony? Come on in.
Back! All right.
Which freako scene is this? You're not Catherine Rawlins.
You're not Marcello Mastroianni, but you don't hear me crying about it.
Where's Catherine? Well, you're all flattery, aren't you, Father? No, no.
I didn't want her to come up here for, uh- for, uh- No, it's very important that I meet her.
Ichabod sent her off on another gig at the last minute.
What-What does that witch have that I don't? Believe me, baby, you would not want to know.
Now, who's Ichabod? Ichabod Grace, the main man.
My sugar mac.
Catherine's too.
Uh-huh.
And where do I find Catherine? Where does she live? Do you know? That creep doesn't talk to anybody.
I don't know anything about her except she uses four pounds of pancake and rouge on her face, and guys pay for that.
Well, she has to use it.
She's not well.
Aww.
Where do I find Ichabod? You're gonna find him hoppin' mad when he hears I came up here and didn't get paid.
Two hundred dollars, sweetcheeks.
Two hundred dollars? Welcome to Hollywood, sailor.
I don't have to answer questions like that about my business.
That's an invasion of the laissez-faire principle of free enterprise.
Yeah, Linda Courtner used to work for you, is that right? Maybe.
So what? Catherine Rawlins killed her.
You're nuts.
Why would she want to do a thing like that? Uh, well, Catherine Rawlins was Linda Courtner's sister, and she had reasons that even you wouldn't understand.
Sister? Yeah.
You are crazy.
I am? What has Catherine been wearing lately in the way of clothes? I'll bet my bottom dollar they all belong to Linda.
You know, maybe there is some kind of family resemblance.
I just never noticed it.
And that Catherine- She is weird.
You could be considered an accessory to a murder.
Now, where is she? Talk to my lawyer.
You talk to your lawyer.
You're withholding evidence in a killing.
Now, where is she? I sent her over to Stacker's pad.
Stacker? Stacker who? "Stacker who?" Don't you follow football, chum? Clayton "Stacker" Schumaker of the Los Angeles Rams.
Tackle Hugo Maltz and the famous Rams Godzilla Gang arrived at the home of Stacker Schumaker to give their amorous teammate what Maltz had called one hellacious surprise.
The surprise was all theirs.
It-It got- It got knocked in there during the fight.
Be careful! Careful, will you? Please, they might be good.
There.
Okay.
Oh, that's terrific.
That's just terrific.
Listen, these pictures would have shown - I know.
A woman.
Yeah.
A woman did all this, huh? Ask your men.
They chased her for three blocks.
Ask them what they saw.
All they saw is someone with long hair.
Could have been a guy from the Dark Star Coven.
They all have long hair.
Yeah.
Are they all built like Veronica Lake? Can they juggle the Godzilla Gang single-handedly, huh? Ever hear of karate, kung fu? Listen, what I saw was not kung fu, and it wasn't chow mein.
It was a female vampire.
I don't want to hear that word again! With superhuman strength.
But I don't have superhuman patience! What I do have is all used up.
Her name is Catherine Rawlins.
She's the sister of Linda Courtner.
She disappeared in Las Vegas after having been bitten by a vam- Thousands of people disappear! Is Amelia Earhart supposed to show up as a vampire? Uh-huh! Uh-huh! Ha-ha-ha! She was a high-priced hooker in Vegas.
She probably operates exactly the same way down here.
Go on.
Find her.
Look for her.
Kill her.
Use your resources.
Chicago, Lieutenant.
I'm gonna use my resources on you.
Collect, right? Collect.
Hello.
Mr.
Anthony Vincenzo? Yes.
Yes.
- Lieutenant Matteo, L.
A.
P.
D.
- Oh! It's Kolchak, isn't it? He was found on the scene of a multiple homicide.
He's a material witness, and if we want to, we can make him more than that.
Pretty soon the flak is gonna start flying back to Chicago.
Please, please, Lieutenant.
Uh, let me speak to him.
I don't want that word mentioned.
Hi, Tony.
I'm tired of it, Kolchak.
I am fed up! I've got a brother-in-law who's got a 14-year-old kid he's always bailing out of juvenile hall, but I've got you, and you are worse! Tony, they're just pressuring me, that's all.
What they're doing isn't even legal.
Whatever it is, you do it, Carl, or so help me, you haven't got a job here.
But, Tony, it was an absolutely remarkable thing: It's an incredible story.
I mean it, Carl! I'll fire you.
I won't have any choice.
You've lied, you've connived, you've weaseled, and you belong on the unemployment line! Tony, Tony, listen to me.
I was here in the flesh when it happened, when all the killings took place.
It was done by a female vamp- It was what? Are you there, Kolchak? It was what? It was a- Well, some say it was a couple of warlocks.
I don't know what you're talking about, and I don't care.
You just remember this - Whatever you do next, I.
N.
S.
Is not behind you.
I.
N.
S.
Is only behind a story on Amerta Mera, which, incidentally, I.
N.
S.
Better get, or you'll be waiting in line at Window "A"! I understand you, I.
N.
S.
Over and out.
Kolchak.
Kolchak! Oh, I'm sorry.
You want to speak to him? I'll say it to you.
Be on a plane by 6:00 this morning.
Well, I don't know if I can make that.
Then we'll carry you on and stuff you into a seat.
Balaban! Give Mr.
Kolchak a ride back to his hotel.
He's tired of the smog.
He wants to go home.
Oh, no, no, I like Los- If he won't get in the car, jam his tie in the door and drag him.
Oh, that's a sa- That's a dumb thing.
That's a silly thing to do.
Uh, Officer, do you have a wife and little ones at home? Hi.
Can I come in? Oh, yeah.
Sure.
Oh, here's your lipstick.
Thank you.
How'd you make out? Terrific.
You're not leaving now, are you? Well, it's either now or after 12 years in San Quentin.
Personally, I prefer now.
Carl, I sure hate to see you go.
You're in the minority.
We'll keep in touch.
Listen, what about the story? I've got some terrific ideas.
I know you're gonna love it.
I'll bet you have.
Write it.
Oh, no.
It's back to real estate for me.
No, no.
You keep on writing.
It'll take you a little time to get the hang of it, but- Real estate? Do companies out here rent as well as sell houses? Well, sure.
We've got a lot of them.
Yeah.
How would a - How would a person find out if a house had been rented or sold, uh, purchased or bought or leased in the last week or two? Well, I could look in multiple listings.
It covers every broker in town.
It'd take a while.
At your office? Yeah.
Where's your office? It turned out that Los Angeles has nearly as many real estate offices as it has traffic jams.
Poor Faye Kruger and I spent till we finally had some luck, if you can call it luck.
By the time Catherine Rawlins's house had been located, the sun had gone down, and if I waited for daylight, I'd find myself on an eastboundjet compliments of the police, and Catherine would be thousands of miles behind me, slumbering, waiting for the next in an endless number of dark, quiet nights.
The multiple listings had described Catherine's house as a baronial retreat.
It was actually a decayed, turn-of-the-century mansion awaiting to be replaced by a condominium, and it would appeal to a special type of client, someone unconcerned with earthly comforts.
And it was secluded.
Who would go near it? Only a vampire or some fool looking for her.
Get away! Yeah! Aah! Hey! Get away! Get away! Matteo had a detective tailing me, but he lost me about the time Catherine found me.
I wasn't particularly hard to find after that.
It was just a question of following the light.
I was told it could be seen from the Sunset Strip, West Los Angeles and Malibu.
It was a local landmark, so I had to pay for another one, and I didn't mind at all.
I just couldn't think of a way to get it on the expense account.
They booked me for murder, just like I thought they would, but then, after 12 hours, they let me go.
They never did say why, but as I was sitting in Lieutenant Matteo's office, waiting for execution, I happened to see a coroner's report on Catherine Rawlins.
I quote the coroner- "The tissue structure of the individual appeared to be that of a female, species: Human, "who had been dead at least three years.
This is a medical conundrum for which I have no explanation.
" Three years.