Primos (2024) s01e04 Episode Script

1
[Opening theme music playing]
- [cat snarling]
- [dogs barking]
Hey! Another day
In my old hood ♪
Summer's starting
And it's gonna be so good ♪
Hey, oh, hey!
I was gonna be so cool ♪
Then you all moved in
And got me looking like a fool, again ♪
Oye, Primos ♪
Why you all up in my face ♪
Oye, Primos ♪
Get up out my space ♪
Oye, Primos ♪
You're wearing out my brain ♪
You're driving me insane ♪
Not the roll call again ♪
Cousin Bud, Nacho and Lita ♪
Tere, Tabi and Toñita ♪
Scooter, Lotlot and Gordita ♪
Nachito, ChaCha and Lucita ♪
Yay ♪
No, come on ♪
Oye, Primos ♪
[Grunts in frustration]
[Bud reading]
Cha cha cha cha!
[Aggressively] Cha cha cha
[Lovingly] Cha cha.
[All singing conga line dance song]
Happy Father's Day!
We got you a new baseball glove.
Oh, thank you.
[Both] He loves it!
[Camera clicking]
[all] Feliz Dia del Padre!
We got you daddy-daughter glam shots.
Oh! Gracias, mis niñas!
[All] He loves it!
Happy Father's Day!
We got you a gift card
to the hardware store.
Oh, yeah. Look at that.
Thanks.
- Do you love it?
- Well, I'll tell you what I'd love,
Fixing that Tater-shaped
hole in the fence.
[Groans]
[chuckles] Well, his card
oughta cover the supplies.
Guess I'm going
to the hardware store.
[Tires screeching]
We failed Dad.
Instead of a loving gift
to show how much we appreciate him,
we gifted him more work.
Now, he's off to the hardware store
when he could be staying home
with his adorable kids.
- And you.
- Eh, Bud be Bud.
Dad goes to the hardware store
all the time.
Yeah, but only because
we keep breaking stuff.
[Clattering]
[babbling and giggling]
Okey-dokey, then.
While you go crazy
fixing problems that don't exist,
I'm going Tio-watching.
Come here, Tio, Tio, Tio!
I guess it's up to us
to save Father's Day, then.
What do you say, Baby Bud?
[Babbles]
That's right! Time to learn
more about Dad, bond with him,
- and surprise him with a better gift.
- Yeah.
It's time for Operation
Booyah Buh-Dad!
[Grunts]
Tater and Baby Bud ♪
Looking for clues
In Dad's bedroom ♪
I wonder
What they'll find today ♪
[Babbles]
[Bud] Tools!
That's very disappointing ♪
Uh-huh.
Wonder what else they'll find ♪
It's just more tools ♪
Dad's gotta have
Some interests other than tools ♪
[Baby Bud babbles]
Nope, it's tools ♪
[Grunts angrily]
What the heck, Dad?
Why does he only like tools?
Even his vision board has tools!
This has gotta be
some sort of a joke, Dad.
[Gasps] "A joke, Dad"?
That's it!
A dad joke!
It's time for the next step
in Operation Booyah Buh-Dad,
bonding with him!
- [Sign buzzing]
- [crowd applauding]
We'll tell Dad the funniest dad joke
ever and make him laugh so hard,
his emotional dam will break.
Everyone's a flood of vulnerability!
Best Father's Day ever!
And just in time! Dad's here!
Hope he's ready to laugh.
- Hey, Dad.
- Yes, Sweet Potater?
- [Both giggling]
- Is the refrigerator running?
- [Tense music playing]
- Is it not? It was working this morning!
No, wait. It was just
a dad joke.
We don't have any Freon!
We should always
have emergency Freon.
Well, guess I'm going back
to the hardware store.
Dad, the fridge is fine!
[Bud whimpering]
We drove him there again.
Why does this keep happening?
Shh! Would you quiet down?
You'll spook the Tios.
Commencing Tio-watch.
Ooh, this is nice.
[Nellie] Mmm-hmm. Interesting.
Uh-huh.
- Oh, whoa.
- [Glass shattering]
Tio-watch log,
a Tio is always up
for a game of catch with his kids,
- even if he's not very good at it.
- Get back here!
[Chuckling] Almost got it
that time, champ.
[Straining] Whoa!
[Both grunt]
Ow.
Ooh, that's it, Baby Bud!
The perfect way to bond with Dad.
- [Babbles]
- Exactly!
No dad in the history of dads
could resist a game of catch
with his adorable kids!
And Bud will be way better
than Tio Ignacio.
I mean, he can't be worse.
Ah, perfect timing!
Let's play ball!
[Baseball music playing]
[babbling]
Uh-uh.
Uh-uh.
That's the signal.
Hey, Dad!
Catch this!
Huh? Whoa!
Oh, no.
Well, guess I'm going back
to the hardware store.
No, Dad, wait!
I [sighs] How?
[Sighs] Come here, Baby Bud.
This will be
our Father's Day gift for Dad.
We won't move or touch anything,
so we'll stop breaking stuff and making
him have to go to the hardware store.
[Panting]
Great idea, Bibi.
[Groans] Being Pop's
workout partner for Father's Day.
[Laughs and gasping]
[Tater] Must not break anything.
[Panting] Tater, is that you?
[Both grunt]
What's wrong, mijita?
I feel like everyone has a good
relationship with their dad.
You and Pop, the Primos
and the Tios.
Even the garage possum
and his kids.
Everyone [sighs] but me.
Aww, Tater, your dad [panting]
might not be like the other dads,
but he loves you all so much.
Oh, come on, Pop! Lunges?
Oh, Tater. [breathing heavily]
Everything will be okay, okay?
[Exclaiming in Spanish]
He's not like other dads, huh?
- [Babbling]
- Yeah, well
[Babbling urgently]
[Tater] If Dad really
loves us all so much,
would it kill him
if he showed it sometimes?
Tater?
Dad?
Well, I
Guess I'm going back
to the hardware store.
No! Dad, wait!
We can't let Dad drive off
to the hardware store again!
Strap in, Baby Bud, 'cause we're going
to the hardware store.
- [Grunting]
- [babbling]
There he is! Quick!
Dad, wait! I'm sorry
we keep breaking everything.
Huh? [voice trembles]
Oh, there you are, Dad.
[Ominous music playing]
You're not my dad!
What is happening?
[Sinister music playing]
[screaming and panting]
Daddy?
[Gasps] Papa?
[Whimpering]
Daddy! [yells]
[sobbing]
This is where
we keep driving dad off to.
It's a total nightmare!
Yello! Afternoon, everybody.
- [All greeting]
- Oh, hello, handsome.
[Old western music playing]
Hey, Bud. How do I fix
my leaky faucet?
Replace the gasket and seat washer.
How do I fix my squeaky hinges?
Spray 'em with lubricating oil.
Oh, thank you.
Thank you so much.
[Overlapping chatter]
Oh!
So, that's why Dad's
always so quick to come here.
It's his sanctuary.
All this time, I thought
we were driving him away,
but Dad actually fits in
super-well here.
He's so happy, Baby Bud.
Maybe the best present
we can give him
is to let him enjoy
his happy place in peace.
[Man] Dang, is there anything
Mr. Fixit can't fix?
[Bud] Actually, friends
There is.
Got a leaky faucet
I know what to do ♪
Had a tile come loose
I've got the perfect glue ♪
I can fix 'most anything
Y'all can think of ♪
But when it comes to
This here one thing ♪
I confess I'm feeling stuck ♪
They don't come
With manuals or rules ♪
So, no matter how I try ♪
I end up feeling like a fool ♪
Oh, yeah ♪
Things get tough ♪
With my kids ♪
My adorable kids ♪
I can't find the stuff
To patch it up ♪
It's the one thing
That I know I just can't fix ♪
I don't know what it is ♪
I got a wrench
For each occasion ♪
Every nut, bolt
Washer and screw ♪
But when it comes to
Talking brass tacks with my kids ♪
I just don't got the tools ♪
I don't got 'em.
[Yelps]
Are those
two of my adorable kids?
Dad. Uh
[Grunting nervously]
Oh, sandbags!
[Screaming]
[Dramatic music playing]
[screaming]
[indistinct commotion]
Kids, what are you doing here?
It was a dad joke.
And, then, the baseball.
[Babbling]
[sniffling] The fridge
is fine.
[Sobbing
and mumbling incoherently]
Oh, I see.
Come here, Sweet Potater.
[Soft instrumental
music playing]
I'm sorry I ran here.
I just needed a minute
to think about my
My feelings.
Kids don't come with tools
and a manual, you know?
Neither do dads.
[All exclaiming]
I love this place.
Well, guess we're going back home.
[Snoring]
[Soft instrumental music playing]
[door rings]
Don't forget your manners, boys.
[Speaking other language]
[both] Feliz Dia del Padre!
Ooh, a tortilla chip.
[Chuckles] Five-second rule.
I'm gonna put Baby Bud
down for a nap.
But when I'm back,
would you want to, maybe,
hang out with your old man
while he fixes the fence,
and the window, and the fridge?
The refrigerator is running, Dad.
Oh, sure, sure. I just wanna
check on it, though, just in case.
Happy Father's Day, Dad.
Thanks, Sweet Potater.
Ow! Tio Ignacio Oh.
Hey, Sport. Wanna play catch?
Tio Nellie. Sure.
[Laughs] Good one, kiddo.
All right.
[Grunts]
You know,
maybe the fence can wait.
Hey, got room for one more, kiddos?
[Tater] Yeah, get over here, Dad!
Here, catch!
Let your old man in here!
Put that pickle right in there!
Got 'er!
[Woman reading]
[Peaceful music playing]
[crowing]
[screeching loudly]
- [all snoring]
- [whimpering]
[snoring and farting]
[groaning]
[humming]
[groans]
Yikes. Ever heard of beauty sleep?
Because it has not heard
of you. Eh? Eh?
Not today, Nellie!
The Primos kept me up all night,
snoring, and sleep-talking,
and sleep-prootsing.
[Toilet flushing]
Good morning, Primas.
Is it?
How are you so awake?
Didn't the Primos keep you up?
Oh, I sleep outside.
Outside? In our yard?
- [Ominous music playing]
- [hissing and screeching]
[shivering]
And you survived?
Sure. Nature always provides.
All I need is the clothes on my back
and my bare little feeties.
[Dramatic music playing]
[Humming joyfully]
What a weirdo.
Maybe our sleep situation
isn't so bad after all.
[Farting loudly]
[groaning and yelling]
On second thought,
maybe Cousin Bud's onto something.
I can handle a little dirt
and sun, can't I?
I'm tough, rugged, nature-y.
[Gasps] This might even be
my final form!
[Heroic music playing]
I could be Nature-Tater,
commander of wild beasts!
- Charge!
- [Wolf howling]
[laughing maniacally]
Today, I begin my journey
to become Nature-Tater.
And tonight,
I sleep under the stars!
Huh. Good idea.
That's very supportive of you, Nellie.
Wait a minute.
Are you supporting my dreams?
What are sisters for?
[Slurps]
[groans in disgust]
All right, we're gonna start the bidding
on Tater's bunk at one week's chores.
Do I hear two weeks?
What about three?
You're renting out Tater's bed?
[Scoffs] No one's
gonna pay for that.
Oh, really? Even with complimentary
pillow chocolates?
[All gasp]
Cha-cha chocolate!
And a proots-proof canopy?
[All exclaiming]
Nature-Tater won't be needing
these. [chuckles]
[sizzling]
[yells] That's hot!
[Yells] That's sharp!
[Yells] That's stings!
Get off, get off, get off!
Oh, that's better.
Thank you, Mr. Rock.
- [Ominous music playing]
- [screeching]
[screams]
[continues screaming]
This will fix it.
Time to show nature
who's boss.
[Heroic music playing]
[whining] The sun is bright.
Ooh, shade!
Hey!
How's it even doing that?
There's gotta be a solution. Oh!
Booyah buh-bam!
Nature-Tater
can make her own shade.
[Grunts]
[yells]
[screaming]
Oh, my gosh!
Little buddy, are you okay?
[Tater crashing]
[groaning]
[barking]
[gasps] Sweet doggy!
What you doing
in our [gasps]
[screams] A snake!
- [Straining]
- [dog whimpering]
Come back!
[Groans]
Oh, hey! A whole strawberry.
- How are you?
- [Retches]
[Ominous music playing]
- [stomach rumbling]
- [groaning]
So hungry.
[Bird screeching]
[chirping]
Guavas!
[Grunts]
[groans]
[chuckles] Nature-Tater finds a way!
[Grunts]
[chirping angrily]
Whoops. Sorry.
Booyah buh-bam!
[Buzzing]
[screams]
I'm sorry! I didn't know
you guys had dibs!
[Screaming]
[yelling]
What made me think
I could be Nature-Tater?
Huh?
Come on, little buddies. I've got
a whole buffet for you in my compost.
How are you not getting stung?
Wild peppermint.
It's a natural wasp-deterrent.
Doesn't hurt 'em, though.
Oh, good.
I definitely don't wanna
hurt the bloodthirsty wasps!
Is everything okay, Tater?
I kind of noticed
you were having a rough morning,
but I didn't wanna interfere
with your process.
Please interfere!
Teach me how to control nature
like you!
[Laughing]
I don't try to control
anything, Tater-Gator.
We're all part
of the same nature fam.
Like this little guy.
[Screams] It's back!
Hey, little fella.
You weren't trying to scare
Tater before, were ya?
You were just trying to find
some shade from the sun.
And the sun isn't out
to get anyone, either.
It's just doing its best to help
the little planties grow.
The nature fam looks out for each other,
just like our fam.
[All shouting]
If there's anything you need,
the nature fam can provide it.
Food, shelter, peace.
What's the catch?
[Chuckles] No catch.
Just return the favor
by listening back to nature.
So, you're saying plants talk?
Not exactly.
But they communicate. See?
A withered leaf
is saying it needs water.
And look at this little dude
over here.
This dried up lizard just needs
some of that good old life juice.
[Chirping intensely]
Honestly, most things
just need water.
Oh, my compost.
Thanks, nature fam.
There you go, little buddy.
This will give you a place
to rest and recover.
See what I'm saying, Tater?
Nature's always talking
if you're willing to listen.
- [Wind blowing]
- [bird screeching]
[Tater] Whoa!
They're like little people!
Wow!
Huh?
[Enchanting music playing]
Hmm?
[Grunts softly]
[sighs]
Hmm?
- Hmm. Uh
- [Bees buzzing]
[wind blowing softly]
Looking good, Nature-Tater.
Thanks, Cousin Bud!
I'm gonna level up, become a rugged
woman of the great backyard
by sleeping under the stars
on my own.
Like a baby bird
leaving the nest.
I got you.
I'll sleep inside tonight.
Might be fun to hang out
with the Primo fam.
[Indistinct yelling]
Come on, Natalie,
I'll give you ten bucks!
I'll give you
an extra big hug tonight.
That's sweet, Lucita.
But I can't buy anything with hugs.
What else you got?
Maybe I'll go see
what Buela's up to.
[Sighs peacefully]
[owl hooting]
[insects trilling]
[screeching]
[animal screaming]
- [whimpers]
- [roaring]
What was that?
- [Suspenseful music playing]
- [rustling]
A coyote? A mountain lion?
El Chupacabra?
What do I do?
Remember, Tater,
listen to the nature fam.
[Breath trembling]
Come on, Tater.
Um, hello out there!
I'm listening,
and I'm hearing
that you're angry,
and possibly wanna eat me!
[Whimpering]
Aww.
[Whimpers softly]
Hey, I know you.
[Whimpers]
It's okay.
Do you need help
getting that thing off?
[Whimpers]
Maybe a little hydration, Major-Tater?
[Soft instrumental music playing]
Ah, that's better.
So, it might be easier
without the tire.
[Barking joyfully]
Oh, there you go!
You can go home to your family.
[Whimpers]
Do you wanna stay?
[Farts]
Oh, I like you, too.
[Snoring]
[gasps] Breakfast!
Hey, Tater. Buela sends her love
and chilaquiles.
How was your night,
little nature buddy?
Amazing! I've never
slept better in my life.
Oh, I even made a friend
Or I thought I did.
I helped the dog last night, but I guess
she didn't wanna stick around.
Hey, don't feel bad.
That's another way
the nature fam is like our fam.
They might not wanna hang out
all the time,
but the bond is for life.
- I hope so.
- [Barking distantly]
I feel like I can still hear
her sweet little bark in my mind.
- [Barking]
- Uh, Tater.
[Laughing] You're back!
And you brought your friends!
[All panting]
[all barking]
Nature-Tater happy!
Soar, little Tater bird. Soar!
[Laughing]
[howling]
- I demand a refund!
- Hey!
These sheets
are not 500 thread count.
Why is this bagel soggy?
This is gross.
[Farts]
[Closing theme music playing]