Russian Doll (2019) s01e04 Episode Script

Alan's Routine

1 [WATER RUNNING.]
Ten.
["PIANO CONCERTO NO.
4 IN G MAJOR, OP.
58: III.
RONDO: VIVACE" PLAYING.]
- Play affirmations for success.
- [DEVICE CHIMES.]
[AUTOMATED FEMALE VOICE.]
Affirmations for success: I am beautiful.
[ALAN.]
I am beautiful.
[AUTOMATED VOICE.]
I am loved and deserve love.
[ALAN.]
I am loved and deserve love.
[AUTOMATED VOICE.]
I am in control.
I am in control.
- I am beautiful.
- I am beautiful.
[AUTOMATED VOICE.]
I am loved and deserve love.
I am in control.
I am beautiful.
I am loved and deserve love.
[DOOR OPENS.]
- Thank you.
- My pleasure.
Thank you very much.
Nice kid.
- [AUTOMATED VOICE.]
I am beautiful.
- I am beautiful.
[AUTOMATED VOICE.]
I am loved and deserve love.
I'm loved.
I deserve to be loved.
- [AUTOMATED VOICE.]
I am in control.
- I'm in control.
- [JOHN.]
Maxine invited me to your party.
- I'm in control.
- [JOHN.]
Are you here? - Yeah, I know, but, uh I'm trying to find this guy I met the other night.
[JOHN.]
Oh.
Wow, okay.
Well, that's a That's a good way to make me feel special.
Right.
No, no, no, it's not like a sex thing.
It's He's a homelss guy.
[SOFTLY SPEAKING TO HIMSELF.]
[SOFTLY.]
I'm in control.
I'm in control.
[EXHALES.]
Okay, bye.
You're early.
- You look - Thanks.
- What's up? You seem a little - You always say that.
- I always say - Yes, always.
Routine is an incredible thing, Beatrice.
We become what we repeatedly do.
Is that one of your affirmations? - Where are your bags? - Where are your bags? - We need to talk - To talk.
Yes, let's talk.
It seems like a great time to talk, on the night before we leave on a week-long vacation I've been planning for months.
I need a drink.
What's up, Bea? You seem nervous.
Almost as if it's occurring to you in this moment, maybe, possibly that this is gonna be harder than you thought.
- Did somebody tell you - You're going to break up with me? No.
No, you did.
Stop playing these mind games.
What is the point of all this? To humiliate me? To make me - feel bad? - Yes! That That wasn't supposed to happen.
That Uh [EXHALES.]
No.
No.
This is the problem.
You're always trying to fix every little thing.
I can fix things.
I just did.
I I can't do this anymore.
- You need help.
- I was gonna propose.
I'm sorry.
I'll see you next time.
- [ROCK MUSIC PLAYING.]
- [INDISTINCT CHATTER.]
[ALAN GRUNTS.]
[SIGHS.]
- [GUNSHOTS IN VIDEO GAME.]
- Oh.
[GUNSHOTS CONTINUES.]
[SIGHS.]
Oh, God.
Fuck! Break up or birthday? Birthday.
All right.
[BELCHES.]
[BOTTLE CLANKING.]
[VIDEO GAME GUNSHOTS.]
[GROANS.]
[HORN HONKS IN DISTANCE.]
[PHONE CHIMES.]
[PHONE CHIMES.]
- - [KEYBOARD KEYS CLACKING.]
[CLASSICAL MUSIC PLAYING.]
[GRUNTS.]
[EXHALES.]
[BREATHING HEAVILY.]
[ELEVATOR DINGS.]
Oh, hey.
I thought you were away for the weekend.
- I broke up with my girlfriend.
- Oh, no.
Yeah, so you don't need to feed Boba Fett.
- Oh, okay.
- What was it we decided on? Fifty for the week, right? Here's 100.
Wow.
Okay.
Thanks.
This is actually really great because honestly, I probably would've killed that fish.
Ah, um, can Can I ask you something? Sure.
We live in the same building and we see each other, you know, around.
Um What's your take on me? - I don't have one.
- No.
Really.
I mean, like, if you had to choose Like, if you weren't paying me, I never would've spoken to you.
Okay.
Um, thank you.
Thank you for your honesty.
- [SIGHS.]
- [DOOR CLOSES.]
You're shitting me.
You were gonna propose.
[STAMMERING.]
Ever since I've known you, it's been Beatrice.
I mean, nobody gets through long distance in college.
She's the wrong person for me.
Yo You just blew up your whole life and you are serial-killer calm about it.
Do you think it's possible to correct your life? I find myself in this position of finally being able to do things the right way.
You know? Why don't you come over for dinner? Sheree and I would love to have you.
Friday night.
Yeah.
Whenever Friday happens, I'll be there.
[ELEVATOR DINGS.]
[WOMAN.]
I was just gonna reach out.
[ELEVATOR DINGS.]
[ELEVATOR DINGS.]
[DOORS OPENS.]
Hi, I'm here to see Dr.
Zaveri.
- Hi.
- Alan, what's wrong? What are you doing here? Do you have a cold? Oh, no, I just wanted to tell you something.
Aren't you supposed to be at work? You can't skip work.
- I'm trying to tell you - You can't go skipping work again.
Whatever it is you want to tell me, it can wait until later.
I proposed to Beatrice.
Did she say yes? Yes.
Yes, she said yes.
- [LAUGHS.]
Of course she did.
- [ALAN LAUGHS.]
Oh! Oh, I'm so happy for you.
- Me too.
- [BOTH CHUCKLE.]
You just wait and see.
This is gonna change everything.
- I know.
You're right.
- Mm-hmm.
[ELEVATOR DINGS.]
[AUTOMATED VOICE.]
Going up.
[STOPS TAPPING.]
[ELEVATOR SCREECHES.]
[WOMAN YELPS.]
[AUTOMATED VOICE.]
We are experiencing a temporary power outage.
[ALARM SOUNDS.]
[WOMAN.]
Get your phones! Call 911! No, no, no, no, no! Get down, everyone! Everyone, lie on your backs! Get down, get down, get down! Hey, man.
Didn't you get the news? We're about to die.
It doesn't matter.
I die all the time.
Me too.
[PEOPLE SCREAMING.]
[ELEVATOR THUDS.]
["PIANO CONCERTO NO.
4 IN G MAJOR, OP.
58: III.
RONDO: VIVACE" PLAYING.]
[ALAN.]
Fuck.
[KNOCK ON DOOR.]
[NADIA.]
Fuck.
["GOTTA GET UP" PLAYING.]
[WATER GOING DOWN DRAIN.]
Gotta get up, gotta get out Gotta get home Before the morning comes What if I'm late, got a big date Gotta get home before the sun comes up - Fuck.
- [KNOCKING ON DOOR.]
[KNOCKING CONTINUES.]
All right, just give me a second! Gotta let the people know I'm gonna be late There was a time when we could dance Until a quarter to ten We never thought it would end then - Hey, Alan.
- There was a woman on the elevator.
Yeah, women don't like to take the stairs.
We used to carry on and drink And do the rock and roll We never thought we'd get older You are loved and deserve love.
I'm in control.
I'm beautiful and loved.
I deserve love.
I'm in control.
I am beautiful and loved.
[HORNS HONKING IN DISTANCE.]
So, um You haven't said anything since you got here.
You're scaring me.
Sorry.
Um Where were we? Um [SIGHS.]
What's up, Bea? You You look nervous.
Almost as if it's occurring to you that maybe, possibly, all these things are gonna be harder than you thought.
Somebody told you about Mike? Mike? You slept with Mike? You fucked the gingerbread man? - Don't call him that.
- You [CHUCKLES.]
You call him that.
Oh I'm I'm gonna be sick.
Oh, I'm gonna throw up.
Hey, you You cheated on me with that elitist, condescending nightmare.
You never even met him.
You're not even interested Is he the one that you're always on the phone with when I get here? Is this Is this why you two have been meeting up for your dissertation about Philip Roth or whatever? For the millionth time, it's Updike and the suburban imaginary.
[ALAN EXHALES.]
How could you do this to me? It just happened.
And it kept on happening.
And it got harder and harder for me to tell you anything.
You're sensitive.
If I said anything that wasn't in complete agreement or wildly encouraging you were gonna lose your shit.
Or maybe I don't know.
Even hurt yourself.
So, I That's when I realized that there was never gonna be a right time for me to tell you anything.
Fuck! [BREATHING HEAVILY.]
If there are two, one kills the other.
[KEYBOARD KEYS CLACKING.]
[SHAKY BREATHING.]
[DOOR OPENS.]
- [LIANA.]
Hi.
- Hey.
I'm Liana.
Welcome to Garrett's.
Are you looking for anything special? Mother's Day or birthday? Look, I think we can both tell that I'm not really a purchasing type.
Um, so I appreciate you helping me despite having no other customers.
Well, it beats doing this crossword.
You know that condition where you can't remember people's faces.
Facial aphasia? Yes.
I have that, but with names.
Oh, come on.
You're fucking with me.
I mean, people really like to fuck with me, so just No, no, no, it's a real condition.
Mmm, what's that called? It's, uh it's called name aphasia.
Yes, it's a very serious condition.
You can google it after I leave.
Anyway, uh, my boyfriend came in here and he bought me an engagement ring.
Congratulations.
That's wonderful.
Thank you so much.
It's terrific.
It's an exciting time.
Uh I want to make sure that he got me the right ring.
Okay, so he's about six feet tall, early thirties.
He's got, like, disturbingly good posture.
You know, like, he stands very erect.
Like this, but a spine.
Oh, yes.
He kind of looks like Derek Jeter, who, like, obviously goes to the gym all the time, and he's incredibly buff, but not 'cause he's vain, he's just really compulsive, right? Bingo.
That is my weirdo.
Yeah.
He came in here about 20 times.
And then he ended up picking the most basic ring.
No offense.
No, not at all.
Uh, do you know his name? Do I know your boyfriend's name? Yes.
Okay, listen, this is really weird.
Would it kill you to go look in the back? I think you're lying to me, and I think it's time to go.
I'm not lying to you.
Maybe you're lying.
Maybe you're a liar.
It's your boyfriend! Yes.
What, are you accusing me of sleeping with your boyfriend? Listen, I'm a professional.
Do you understand? You know what? I think you're just in here trying to find things out 'cause you want to sell something that somebody gifted you.
You want to bring it to a pawn shop or what? - I don't know, but it's time to go.
- So you don't have the name? - Out! Go! Now! - No problem.
You know what? I applaud your instincts.
I see why they trust you with all these jewels.
Mmm.
A bunch of malarkey.
Bye.
[SIGHS.]
Come on, baby.
Mm-hmm.
Alan Zaveri.
Hmm.
Looks like somebody really likes shawarma.
- Wanna talk about it? - What? The break up, man.
- Oh.
- Beatrice.
This Mike asshole.
Yeah.
No, I mean, I I don't think there's anything to to say.
How long has this been going on for? I don't, um I didn't really ask.
I didn't really ask a lot of things.
I would have asked so many things.
I mean I never really liked Beatrice.
What? Yeah, I mean, I never said anything mean 'cause she was just always there.
You know, Sheree cheated on me once when we first started dating.
You never told me that.
Yeah, we actually went to couple's therapy and everything.
I don't know.
Eventually things just got better.
But I wanted to know everything: how many times it happened, where it happened, who was this guy.
Was she gonna do it again? - I don't.
I can't.
- Why? I don't do therapy.
I know you don't, but it's worth a shot, okay? And Sean helped me and Sheree get through our problems.
I mean, having a third person there really kind of gave us perspective.
I can I I can do it by myself.
I can.
No one can do anything by themselves.
[BUZZES REPEATEDLY.]
Oh, hey, Coco.
Uh, I'm Alan's buddy, six L.
His buzzer's broken.
Can you let me in? How do I know you're not a murderer? My sparkling personality? - How many people have you murdered? - None.
That's what a murderer would say.
[NADIA.]
Really? Do I know you? What the fuck is this? Hey, man, I tried to jimmy your lock, but I guess that shit only works in movies, huh.
How did you find me? Uh, we're neighbors.
I live around the corner on Fifth and B.
No, no, thank you.
No.
Oh.
No, I'm not selling anything, dude.
Do you think it's weird that we live in the same neighborhood? Do you think it means anything? Do you think we're dead? That we're the same person? You know, I got a couple of theories that I'm working on.
Us being the same person is my current favorite.
How would that even work that we could possibly Check it out, check it out.
Can you feel this? Does it hurt? Is it hurting you? It's hurting me.
Okay, stop.
Just Hey, look, pal.
I'm not so sweet on you either, okay? But right now you're the only lead I've got.
- Lead? - Yeah, you know, uh, clue.
To get out of this, whatever this is, this situation.
There is no way out of this situation.
And, personally, I liked it.
I had control.
I I knew what was coming.
And then you showed up and led me down this weird path, like a carcinogenic Siren.
- You're welcome.
- No, I'm not thanking you.
You showed up and everything has gone off.
I I learned something I really didn't want to know.
Beatrice, my girlfriend for nine years, has been cheating on me.
[NADIA.]
Whoa.
That's very heavy.
If you'd like to meet up again, I will be at my birthday party yesterday night.
- You're restarting on your birthday? - Ah, yes.
Yes, I am.
The party's at the old yeshiva on Tenth and A, all right? You can't miss it.
And I can tell that you're really bent out of shape about this Beatrice character, but, you know, we literally just met, so, like, none of this is on me.
[NADIA SIGHS.]
From what I gather, we are in this together.
["SYMPHONY NO.
2 IN D, OP.
36-4.
ALLEGRO MOLTO" PLAYING.]
[INHALES.]
Or if you think about Faulkner's influence on William Styron Styron's protagonist and living with the legacy of slave-holding territories it lays very nicely on top of the counter narrative of German concentration camp survivors.
So we have a hero right, who's who's haunted by, but maybe romantically - compelled by the horrors - [DOOR OPENS.]
Excuse me, this is a private office.
[INDISTINCT YELLING.]
[MIKE.]
Fuck you! [GRUNTING.]
Jesus Christ! - [MAN.]
Hey, hey, what's going on? - [MIKE.]
Hey, man, get off of me! - [MAN.]
You need to walk away.
- [ALAN.]
No! - You need to go, sir.
- Fucking Christ.
- You're an asshole.
- Who are you? I'm Beatrice's boyfriend.
[EXHALES.]
Ah.
- [ALAN.]
Yeah? - You're, uh You're Alan.
- Yeah.
- You know this man? [MIKE.]
It's We're fine.
You can go.
No, no, no, you don't know me.
Listen, Alan.
We can talk about this.
[SCREAMING.]
- That's enough, all right? That's enough! - Okay, I'm going! Alan she's unhappy, man.
I'm just her excuse to leave.
Go to hell.
[PANTING.]
- How's my face? - It's fine.
- Yeah? - Yeah.
Good.
'Cause the mirror's gone, so I I can't tell.
["IRHE" PLAYING.]
[ELECTRICITY CRACKLES.]
[ELECTRICAL CURRENT HUMS.]
Twelve.
[WATER GOING DOWN DRAIN.]
["PIANO CONCERTO NO.
4 IN G MAJOR, OP.
58: III.
RONDO: VIVACE" PLAYING.]
[SIGHS.]
It's gone.
[CHUCKLES.]

Previous EpisodeNext Episode