South of Nowhere s01e04 Episode Script
First Time
Little secret: girls who are dancing with their girlfriends would rather be dancing with a potential boyfriend.
Yeah, unless they're together.
You know, like a couple.
Isn't that every guys' fantasy? Two girls at the same time? Don't believe everything you read, Spencer.
I know, I'm just going by everything that you read.
- Or at least what's under your bed.
- Those are Glenn's.
I need some water.
Hello.
Hello! What do those two girls have that I don't have? No moral fiber.
Just a guess.
- Excuse-me.
Hey.
- He always lets the Barbies in.
- What are you drinking? - Water.
Hey can I get a bottle of water over here? I'm Kelly.
- Spencer.
- Hi, I'm Clay.
Do you go to King? I haven't seen you around? - That's because I go to Wescott.
- Wescott? - That's a good school! - That's what the brochure says.
Anyway, I was gonna get something to eat, if you guys are interested.
Only I wasn't having any luck snagging a table.
Wait, no problem.
I'll grab it.
So, thanks for helping me with the bartender.
I'd still be trying to flag him down.
If you're not half naked, you're invisible.
Yeah, I bet.
But you know, the way you handle the bartender, I'm sure you could have got us a table, if you really wanted to.
Yeah, well - Your boyfriend seems eager to please.
- Clay, my boyfriend? No, he's my brother.
- So you're single? - Yeah, so far.
So, will you tell me about your night out with that new friend of yours? She has a name, you know.
Oh yeah, she has a lot of names.
most with like 4 and 5 letters.
How many letters does 'I'm allowed to have new friends' have? All I'm saying is she's bad news.
I'd stay clear if I were you.
You know, some people might have said the same about you.
Whatever - Okay, who? - The entire school.
But that's not the point.
And, you know, it doesn't mean that she doesn't deserve to have friends.
You are so clueless sometimes.
- You do know she's gay, right? - What? She's not.
You need to reboot your gaydar.
Whatever.
Don't kid yourself.
It's better than your Breeder Meter.
What is it that every gay person is so sure that everybody else is gay? It's not everybody else.
Just the gay ones.
So how was your big brother's date with Madison? Do you mean, will there be a second date? From what I hear, she's a pretty good first date.
- Do I look loaded to you? - What? Cause I think I see my mom.
What is she doing at school? Call you later.
- Did you get lost? - Very funny sweetheart.
No, I have a little favor to ask you.
You know that Rick and I haven't been dating for very long.
And I think tonight is the first time he's going to stay over.
And I haven't actually gotten around to tell him that I have a teenage daughter.
- Mom! - I just don't wanna scare him off.
- So I'm the one who should get lost? - Just for tonight.
Fine, I'll stay with dad.
I just have to swing back home and pick up a couple of things.
Oh, I packed a few of your things, and I threw in that cute little sundress The one that makes you more feminine.
You really planned this out.
Cheer up honey.
Fewer frown lines that way.
- What's up, Spence? - Need a ride home? Yeah actually that Won't be necessary.
Hey, Kelly.
She was at the club last night.
She is fine.
What do you think my chances are? It depends on how fast you can run.
What? - Thanks for the ride.
I owe you one.
- No problem.
If you really wanna pay me back, go with me to see DJ Money at Gray tonight.
You kidding me? I thought it was sold out.
It is.
I got us two tickets.
Short notice, I know.
What do you say? I'm definitely in! Have you heard his new CD? - No, not yet.
- Check this out.
Oh right! This is such a cool car.
- Do you think we can lose the top? - You wanna get topless? - Okay.
- No, no.
Oh, my God, no.
- I meant the convertible top.
- Oh, that top! Why don't you start chasing your own rebounds? Instead of mine? Last time I checked, she was the one paying me the attention.
Of course, that was only after one date, so Who knows what happens when she comes back for the second.
It's time for mamacita to dispense a little discipline.
My mom just sucks.
What's wrong? What's wrong is that dad Number 4 moved out.
And now my mom is having a sleepover with her new man candy.
And my dad's new girlfriend, Jodie, is having a party at his place.
So I'm kicked out of there.
I'm this close to sleeping in my car.
No you're not, you're coming here.
I'll tell my mom that you're staying over.
Only thing is I'm going to see DJ Money tonight.
- With who? - You mean with whom? I mean, with who are you going? And don't lie, cause I know that it's Kelly.
Fine, you got me.
You know, I'll just call her and tell her that you're gonna join us.
No way.
Have fun tonight.
I'll be fine home with your family.
You're not gonna be third wheel.
Damn right I'm not.
You can find someone else to chaperone you on your big date.
- Ash, It's not a date.
- Yeah, right! Remind her of that when she's trying to score.
You killed my momentum by missing that three pointer in the 3d quarter, you loser.
I'm the only who had any momentum out there.
You just walked through the game.
I didn't see you grab any rebounds.
Maybe if you made some of the shots in the first place, I wouldn't have to bail you out on the rebound.
Hey, baby.
Baby? - I thought Glenn was your new slave.
- You know I get bored easily.
I could use a little break.
- I'm listening.
- That's because you still love me.
No.
- That's because I'm a whore.
- I've always liked that about you.
- You're almost dressed, hon? - Yeah, getting there.
Good.
So Ashley.
- Are you ready for the show? - No, I'm actually not a big fan of the DJ.
Well then Make yourself at home.
Dinner will be ready in about an hour.
Thanks.
Ashley, this is an adorable dress.
thanks you.
It's really cute.
You should wear it to dinner.
- You should wear it on your date.
- Oh God, it's not a date! Really? Then why is it the millionth outfit you've tried on? I just wanna look nice.
You know, maybe some cute guy is there.
Oh good, they can watch Kelly feel you up.
Right, it's for the cute guys.
Then why are you putting the platforms on that I let you borrow? You know, they give you blisters.
And they're the last thing the cute guys are gonna notice.
Look all I'm saying is that you're gonna be on your feet the whole night.
Wait.
Unless you want Kelly to sweep you off you feet.
It is not a date.
- Why aren't you on the bus? - Madison's giving me a lift.
Not tonight.
She's giving me a ride.
She wants to give us another shot.
- You're lying.
- Yeah.
I'm standing in here because I like talking to you.
Madison set us up.
It's not a date.
Hi, Kelly.
It is so a date.
So, Kelly Now, that is a terrific dress.
- Thank you Mrs.
Carlin.
- Whose is that? Actually I'm not really into labels, I made it myself.
It's It's really Terrific.
- You guys are in class together? - Actually, I go to Westcott.
That's an impressive school.
We looked into that for Spencer but a little pricy.
- Kelly has a scholarship.
- Is that so Does Wescot ever have dances or mixers cause We'd better go or we gonna be late for the show Are you guys sure you can't stay for dinner? No, mom.
Kelly, you're welcome anytime to dinner.
Alright.
Do you think Kelly would be down with black guys? I think that has nothing to do with being black.
Does she have a boyfriend? I don't believe so.
Sweet.
Sweet.
Yeah, unless they changed the definition of being a lesbian.
I hope Madison's happy.
Do you have signal yet.
- No, this thing got zero range.
- Looks like your jump shot.
Where's your phone? That's right, you left it at home, with your game.
Man, this is gonna take forever.
We'd better move it.
That is, if you can keep up.
- Ashley? - What? - Would you like to say grace? - Grace? I'd like to thank everyone for being here.
And thank you for the food.
And bless the starving children.
And bless the people giving these starving children food.
And Thank you God Thanks you God.
Are we good? Amen.
I thought we were going to the show.
- We are.
This is just the VIP party before.
- We'll never get in here.
Beautiful girls can get in anywhere.
So Ashley, how was your day? My day? See Oh, my mom came by the school today.
Which of course was only to tell me that I couldn't come home.
Cause it would interfere with her trying to 'demmie' some young hottie.
Actually, I guess that means the pool guy's gone.
Hell, yay, he always put too much chlorine in the pool.
So I tried to go over to my dad and crash there.
But that would mean having to hang out with his model girlfriend.
Who isn't even a real model.
Just a hand model.
So that was my day.
What about you? What's your story? I mean, like, isnt it weird being black growing up in an all-white family? Wait Clay You're black? Well, mom and dad adopted me when I was 8.
It's been pretty great ever since.
Were colorblind when it comes to family, right Clay? Yeah.
No, I mean, I think it's awesome.
There aren't enough people like you guys out in the world.
You know, not caring about race or religion.
Sexual orientation.
That's what I love about you guys.
- Hi, what can I get you? - Coke and a cranberry juice.
So, you're here with Kelly? Yeah.
Well Not with, with Does Kelly know that? Sure.
- Have fun.
- Thanks.
I love this song.
Come on.
Bathroom? - Great.
- I assume that wouldn't work.
That's probably cause they assume ordinary idiots have normal cell phones that actually work.
I guess we're not ordinary idiots.
Besides, who were you gonna call? Madison? - You really think she'd come running? - You think she'd come running for you? Who needs Madison? When I've got your sister Hope you got a good look in there.
That is a troubled teen.
She has no parents, no moral grounding, no spirituality.
And Glenn says she's gay.
Honey.
Come on, you're over-reacting.
I don't see any harm in they being friends.
Besides, kids like Spencer don't change overnight.
Yeah, I know.
They change little by little.
The reality is: That girl's gonna be spending far more time with our daughter than we want.
Paul, we've done a great job raising Spencer, teaching her values.
If she trust Ashley maybe we should too Triple word score: Herpes.
At least, Spencer is in good hand with Kelly.
So, what are we doing here? The club seemed too crowded to talk.
Okay, so, what do you wanna talk about? This.
- What are you? A lesbian or a tease? - I thought we were just friends.
Oh, I get it.
this is your little straight girl experiment.
You wanna take a field trip into what it's like to be with a girl.
But as soon as things get a little serious you wanna jump back on the bus.
- That's not what this is.
- No, what this is is a waste of my time.
- So what? Put out, or get out? - Whatever.
It's almost midnight.
Better get Spencerilla home so she can turn back into a straight girl.
- Hey, have you seen a chemistry book? - Not in years.
Sorry.
Me no study a lot.
You okay? Yeah, I was just thinking.
You said the Carlins adopted you when you were 8.
Funny.
That's the same age that my father left me.
Glad it was a good year for somebody.
You're making my life sound like a picnic.
You make your life sound like a picnic.
At least you did that during table.
Well it is Sometimes.
At other times, it is just not.
Look.
Mom and dad, they're great.
But sometimes, I wonder about my real parents.
You know, who they were? Did they abandon me or did they know I'd have a better life with someone else? The messed up thing is I don't know whether to hate them or to thank them.
And I know your parents are all screwed up.
But at least you know they're your parents.
You still got a chance to make things work.
I had the choice made for me.
The thing that bothers me most isn't that they don't care about me.
It's the fact that I care that they don't.
Excuse-me.
Sorry to interrupt.
But we're trying to get to a party on Kent Drive.
And we're a little lost.
- It's back that way.
- Yeah, like a mile and a half.
- Don't you guys play for King High? - Yeah.
Are you lost? Cause if you don't have to be back anytime soon, you can come to the party with us.
- Not a word to Madison? - Not a word to your sister? Let's go.
So, how was your night out? You mean my date? You were right.
She was into me.
- I mean, she didn't - Okay, okay, I get it.
She definitely wanted to be more than friends.
- So do you like her? - What's not to like? Being stalked into the bathroom? driven to make-out points, and accused of being a tease.
- Did she kiss you? - Tried to.
Let me guess.
She took you to Griffith Park? Yeah.
And put on her sexy little music, and tried to make the big move? Yeah, how did you know that? She pulled the same lame maneuver on me last year.
- Why didn't you say something? - I seem to recall that I did! I'm sorry I didn't listen to you, but I just thought you were just being Jealous? - No I mean - Well I was jealous.
You know, like in a friend sort of way.
Forgive me for being so needy? Only if you forgive me for not trusting you.
Forgiven.
It's getting late.
We're gonna go to bed now.
Come on.
Yeah.
Actually I'm making up a bed for Ashley down here.
My parents can be so annoying.
At least they're here.
Hey dad.
It's me, Ashley.
Yeah, unless they're together.
You know, like a couple.
Isn't that every guys' fantasy? Two girls at the same time? Don't believe everything you read, Spencer.
I know, I'm just going by everything that you read.
- Or at least what's under your bed.
- Those are Glenn's.
I need some water.
Hello.
Hello! What do those two girls have that I don't have? No moral fiber.
Just a guess.
- Excuse-me.
Hey.
- He always lets the Barbies in.
- What are you drinking? - Water.
Hey can I get a bottle of water over here? I'm Kelly.
- Spencer.
- Hi, I'm Clay.
Do you go to King? I haven't seen you around? - That's because I go to Wescott.
- Wescott? - That's a good school! - That's what the brochure says.
Anyway, I was gonna get something to eat, if you guys are interested.
Only I wasn't having any luck snagging a table.
Wait, no problem.
I'll grab it.
So, thanks for helping me with the bartender.
I'd still be trying to flag him down.
If you're not half naked, you're invisible.
Yeah, I bet.
But you know, the way you handle the bartender, I'm sure you could have got us a table, if you really wanted to.
Yeah, well - Your boyfriend seems eager to please.
- Clay, my boyfriend? No, he's my brother.
- So you're single? - Yeah, so far.
So, will you tell me about your night out with that new friend of yours? She has a name, you know.
Oh yeah, she has a lot of names.
most with like 4 and 5 letters.
How many letters does 'I'm allowed to have new friends' have? All I'm saying is she's bad news.
I'd stay clear if I were you.
You know, some people might have said the same about you.
Whatever - Okay, who? - The entire school.
But that's not the point.
And, you know, it doesn't mean that she doesn't deserve to have friends.
You are so clueless sometimes.
- You do know she's gay, right? - What? She's not.
You need to reboot your gaydar.
Whatever.
Don't kid yourself.
It's better than your Breeder Meter.
What is it that every gay person is so sure that everybody else is gay? It's not everybody else.
Just the gay ones.
So how was your big brother's date with Madison? Do you mean, will there be a second date? From what I hear, she's a pretty good first date.
- Do I look loaded to you? - What? Cause I think I see my mom.
What is she doing at school? Call you later.
- Did you get lost? - Very funny sweetheart.
No, I have a little favor to ask you.
You know that Rick and I haven't been dating for very long.
And I think tonight is the first time he's going to stay over.
And I haven't actually gotten around to tell him that I have a teenage daughter.
- Mom! - I just don't wanna scare him off.
- So I'm the one who should get lost? - Just for tonight.
Fine, I'll stay with dad.
I just have to swing back home and pick up a couple of things.
Oh, I packed a few of your things, and I threw in that cute little sundress The one that makes you more feminine.
You really planned this out.
Cheer up honey.
Fewer frown lines that way.
- What's up, Spence? - Need a ride home? Yeah actually that Won't be necessary.
Hey, Kelly.
She was at the club last night.
She is fine.
What do you think my chances are? It depends on how fast you can run.
What? - Thanks for the ride.
I owe you one.
- No problem.
If you really wanna pay me back, go with me to see DJ Money at Gray tonight.
You kidding me? I thought it was sold out.
It is.
I got us two tickets.
Short notice, I know.
What do you say? I'm definitely in! Have you heard his new CD? - No, not yet.
- Check this out.
Oh right! This is such a cool car.
- Do you think we can lose the top? - You wanna get topless? - Okay.
- No, no.
Oh, my God, no.
- I meant the convertible top.
- Oh, that top! Why don't you start chasing your own rebounds? Instead of mine? Last time I checked, she was the one paying me the attention.
Of course, that was only after one date, so Who knows what happens when she comes back for the second.
It's time for mamacita to dispense a little discipline.
My mom just sucks.
What's wrong? What's wrong is that dad Number 4 moved out.
And now my mom is having a sleepover with her new man candy.
And my dad's new girlfriend, Jodie, is having a party at his place.
So I'm kicked out of there.
I'm this close to sleeping in my car.
No you're not, you're coming here.
I'll tell my mom that you're staying over.
Only thing is I'm going to see DJ Money tonight.
- With who? - You mean with whom? I mean, with who are you going? And don't lie, cause I know that it's Kelly.
Fine, you got me.
You know, I'll just call her and tell her that you're gonna join us.
No way.
Have fun tonight.
I'll be fine home with your family.
You're not gonna be third wheel.
Damn right I'm not.
You can find someone else to chaperone you on your big date.
- Ash, It's not a date.
- Yeah, right! Remind her of that when she's trying to score.
You killed my momentum by missing that three pointer in the 3d quarter, you loser.
I'm the only who had any momentum out there.
You just walked through the game.
I didn't see you grab any rebounds.
Maybe if you made some of the shots in the first place, I wouldn't have to bail you out on the rebound.
Hey, baby.
Baby? - I thought Glenn was your new slave.
- You know I get bored easily.
I could use a little break.
- I'm listening.
- That's because you still love me.
No.
- That's because I'm a whore.
- I've always liked that about you.
- You're almost dressed, hon? - Yeah, getting there.
Good.
So Ashley.
- Are you ready for the show? - No, I'm actually not a big fan of the DJ.
Well then Make yourself at home.
Dinner will be ready in about an hour.
Thanks.
Ashley, this is an adorable dress.
thanks you.
It's really cute.
You should wear it to dinner.
- You should wear it on your date.
- Oh God, it's not a date! Really? Then why is it the millionth outfit you've tried on? I just wanna look nice.
You know, maybe some cute guy is there.
Oh good, they can watch Kelly feel you up.
Right, it's for the cute guys.
Then why are you putting the platforms on that I let you borrow? You know, they give you blisters.
And they're the last thing the cute guys are gonna notice.
Look all I'm saying is that you're gonna be on your feet the whole night.
Wait.
Unless you want Kelly to sweep you off you feet.
It is not a date.
- Why aren't you on the bus? - Madison's giving me a lift.
Not tonight.
She's giving me a ride.
She wants to give us another shot.
- You're lying.
- Yeah.
I'm standing in here because I like talking to you.
Madison set us up.
It's not a date.
Hi, Kelly.
It is so a date.
So, Kelly Now, that is a terrific dress.
- Thank you Mrs.
Carlin.
- Whose is that? Actually I'm not really into labels, I made it myself.
It's It's really Terrific.
- You guys are in class together? - Actually, I go to Westcott.
That's an impressive school.
We looked into that for Spencer but a little pricy.
- Kelly has a scholarship.
- Is that so Does Wescot ever have dances or mixers cause We'd better go or we gonna be late for the show Are you guys sure you can't stay for dinner? No, mom.
Kelly, you're welcome anytime to dinner.
Alright.
Do you think Kelly would be down with black guys? I think that has nothing to do with being black.
Does she have a boyfriend? I don't believe so.
Sweet.
Sweet.
Yeah, unless they changed the definition of being a lesbian.
I hope Madison's happy.
Do you have signal yet.
- No, this thing got zero range.
- Looks like your jump shot.
Where's your phone? That's right, you left it at home, with your game.
Man, this is gonna take forever.
We'd better move it.
That is, if you can keep up.
- Ashley? - What? - Would you like to say grace? - Grace? I'd like to thank everyone for being here.
And thank you for the food.
And bless the starving children.
And bless the people giving these starving children food.
And Thank you God Thanks you God.
Are we good? Amen.
I thought we were going to the show.
- We are.
This is just the VIP party before.
- We'll never get in here.
Beautiful girls can get in anywhere.
So Ashley, how was your day? My day? See Oh, my mom came by the school today.
Which of course was only to tell me that I couldn't come home.
Cause it would interfere with her trying to 'demmie' some young hottie.
Actually, I guess that means the pool guy's gone.
Hell, yay, he always put too much chlorine in the pool.
So I tried to go over to my dad and crash there.
But that would mean having to hang out with his model girlfriend.
Who isn't even a real model.
Just a hand model.
So that was my day.
What about you? What's your story? I mean, like, isnt it weird being black growing up in an all-white family? Wait Clay You're black? Well, mom and dad adopted me when I was 8.
It's been pretty great ever since.
Were colorblind when it comes to family, right Clay? Yeah.
No, I mean, I think it's awesome.
There aren't enough people like you guys out in the world.
You know, not caring about race or religion.
Sexual orientation.
That's what I love about you guys.
- Hi, what can I get you? - Coke and a cranberry juice.
So, you're here with Kelly? Yeah.
Well Not with, with Does Kelly know that? Sure.
- Have fun.
- Thanks.
I love this song.
Come on.
Bathroom? - Great.
- I assume that wouldn't work.
That's probably cause they assume ordinary idiots have normal cell phones that actually work.
I guess we're not ordinary idiots.
Besides, who were you gonna call? Madison? - You really think she'd come running? - You think she'd come running for you? Who needs Madison? When I've got your sister Hope you got a good look in there.
That is a troubled teen.
She has no parents, no moral grounding, no spirituality.
And Glenn says she's gay.
Honey.
Come on, you're over-reacting.
I don't see any harm in they being friends.
Besides, kids like Spencer don't change overnight.
Yeah, I know.
They change little by little.
The reality is: That girl's gonna be spending far more time with our daughter than we want.
Paul, we've done a great job raising Spencer, teaching her values.
If she trust Ashley maybe we should too Triple word score: Herpes.
At least, Spencer is in good hand with Kelly.
So, what are we doing here? The club seemed too crowded to talk.
Okay, so, what do you wanna talk about? This.
- What are you? A lesbian or a tease? - I thought we were just friends.
Oh, I get it.
this is your little straight girl experiment.
You wanna take a field trip into what it's like to be with a girl.
But as soon as things get a little serious you wanna jump back on the bus.
- That's not what this is.
- No, what this is is a waste of my time.
- So what? Put out, or get out? - Whatever.
It's almost midnight.
Better get Spencerilla home so she can turn back into a straight girl.
- Hey, have you seen a chemistry book? - Not in years.
Sorry.
Me no study a lot.
You okay? Yeah, I was just thinking.
You said the Carlins adopted you when you were 8.
Funny.
That's the same age that my father left me.
Glad it was a good year for somebody.
You're making my life sound like a picnic.
You make your life sound like a picnic.
At least you did that during table.
Well it is Sometimes.
At other times, it is just not.
Look.
Mom and dad, they're great.
But sometimes, I wonder about my real parents.
You know, who they were? Did they abandon me or did they know I'd have a better life with someone else? The messed up thing is I don't know whether to hate them or to thank them.
And I know your parents are all screwed up.
But at least you know they're your parents.
You still got a chance to make things work.
I had the choice made for me.
The thing that bothers me most isn't that they don't care about me.
It's the fact that I care that they don't.
Excuse-me.
Sorry to interrupt.
But we're trying to get to a party on Kent Drive.
And we're a little lost.
- It's back that way.
- Yeah, like a mile and a half.
- Don't you guys play for King High? - Yeah.
Are you lost? Cause if you don't have to be back anytime soon, you can come to the party with us.
- Not a word to Madison? - Not a word to your sister? Let's go.
So, how was your night out? You mean my date? You were right.
She was into me.
- I mean, she didn't - Okay, okay, I get it.
She definitely wanted to be more than friends.
- So do you like her? - What's not to like? Being stalked into the bathroom? driven to make-out points, and accused of being a tease.
- Did she kiss you? - Tried to.
Let me guess.
She took you to Griffith Park? Yeah.
And put on her sexy little music, and tried to make the big move? Yeah, how did you know that? She pulled the same lame maneuver on me last year.
- Why didn't you say something? - I seem to recall that I did! I'm sorry I didn't listen to you, but I just thought you were just being Jealous? - No I mean - Well I was jealous.
You know, like in a friend sort of way.
Forgive me for being so needy? Only if you forgive me for not trusting you.
Forgiven.
It's getting late.
We're gonna go to bed now.
Come on.
Yeah.
Actually I'm making up a bed for Ashley down here.
My parents can be so annoying.
At least they're here.
Hey dad.
It's me, Ashley.