The Adventures of Tintin (1991) s01e04 Episode Script

Cigars of the Pharaoh

ClGARS OF THE PHARAOH Some vacation, huh Snowy? A stopover in Egypt tomorrow, then next stop, Bombay, then on to Hong Kong.
Ah! This is great.
l say! Save that paper! Help somebody! Save that paper! l'll get it! That's it! Excuse me! Coming through! Snowy! Good try, my boy! Sorry, we couldn't save your paper, sir.
Oh, that's alright.
lt was just a travel brochure.
What! Now if it had been my priceless papyrus, that would be another matter.
Allow me to introduce myself.
l am Doctor Sarcophagus.
Hi, l'm Tintin, reporter.
Well, Tintin the reporter, the winds of fate have just blown the story of a lifetime your way.
Oh? l, Sophocles Sarcophagus, the greatest archaeologist of all time, am about to unearth the lost tomb of the Pharaoh Kih-Oskh.
No kidding.
No kidding! My dear boy, l never ''kid''.
Especially when discussing the lost tomb of the Pharaoh.
Lesser archaeologists have dared its curse but none have returned.
None? lt could make quite a story for you.
Okay! Count me in! Bravo! We'll meet in Cairo at ten tomorrow.
Then on to the tomb.
ls this the symbol for the Pharaoh's tomb? We'll find out tomorrow.
And until then, good day! You near-sighted klutz! Watch where you're going! lt was just an accident, sir.
Why, you nosey little punk! This is a day you'll regret.
Nobody talks to R.
J.
Rastapopoulos that way! Nobody! Now where have l seen him before? Ah yes! R.
J.
Rastapopoulos.
The famous movie producer! Beware! Doctor Sarcophagus met a young troublemaker.
Dispose of him before we reach Cairo! Just think Thomson! We've flown all this way to arrest our friend.
There are no friends in our line of work, Thompson.
So true, Thomson, so true! Come in.
Don't make a move! Thompson and Thomson! What are you guys doing here? Don't play innocent with us! What is this? A joke? Does this look like a joke to you? Opium? He admits it! l don't admit anything! Exercising your right to remain silent, are you? Very well.
We're detaining you until the ship docks at port.
Come along! But what about my plans? This is supposed to be my vacation.
Some vacation! The story of a lifetime comes along and here l am framed as a drug smuggler.
l wonder Hi! Heading ashore by any chance? Tintin gave the slip to the police and will probably meet Sarcophagus in Cairo.
You have your orders.
Don't fail me! Aren't you worried about the Pharaoh's curse, doctor? My dear boy! l am not one of those amateur archaeologists stumbling about in the desert.
Doctor! Look! l've found it! Fame at last! This day forward, the name Sophocles Sarcophagus will live in the archives of archaeology forever! What is it, Snowy? A cigar? lsn't that the Pharaoh's emblem? Doctor! Look at this! Doctor? Doctor? The Pharaoh's emblem! Doctor? Doctor! Ah ha! A secret entrance! He must have gone inside.
Doctor Sarcophagus? Doctor! Sealed! Believe in curses, Snowy? Me neither! Let's go! That's his umbrella and his coat.
Doctor! More cigars! The Pharaoh's curse! These must be the missing archaeologists! Doctor Sarcophagus! Oh no! No way! Let's get out of here, Snowy! No! What's that? Gas! Snowy! Leave me alone! Move it! Move it! Coast guard! Prepare for boarding! A raid! Dump the coffins! Fast! All hands on deck! Snowy, you're safe! Doctor Sarcophagus! lt's a fine morning! What? Shout louder! l can't hear you over the wind.
What's that? l can't hear a word.
lt's the wind.
lt's hopeless.
He's getting further and further away.
Good thing we dumped the evidence or they would have nabbed us.
Now if we can only find it again! Message from the boss.
Came while the coast guard was aboard.
''Shipment contains prisoners to be taken to rendezvous 3.
Guard strictly, pending further orders.
'' What? Captain! Look! Get him aboard! lt's getting really rough, Snowy.
Oh, my head! Ah! There you are, my dear sir! Huh? Can l interest you in some of the finest merchandise you've ever laid eyes on? But but I I don't Fear not, sir.
l'm sure my prices will astonish you.
Prices? Just let me show you, sir.
Absolutely no obligation.
Beautiful! Beautiful! Look how it matches your eyes! Quite, quite perfect! What about a sword? A real Toledo steel! An alarm clock? Toothbrush.
Everything a bargain! What's going on, Snowy? Right, lads! Break it up! Back to work! Perhaps some other time, dear sir.
My passenger, Mr.
Pigaro from Lisbon.
So, how are you feeling today, young Sinbad? l've felt better, Captain.
You're lucky to be alive.
lf my men hadn't spotted you Doctor Sarcophagus! Who? Did you pick up anyone else last night, Captain? Just you and the dog.
l must get ashore, fast! My friend is in serious danger.
Goodbye! Good luck! Goodbye, Captain, and thank you! You sure l couldn't interest you in something else, young man? Another canteen perhaps? No thanks.
l'm sure l'll be fine.
- Goodbye! - Goodbye! We must find a town, Snowy.
Wow! l didn't expect one so soon.
The place is deserted.
Uh oh.
There's somebody here and they're in trouble.
lt's okay, miss, you're safe now.
Cut, cut, cut! ldiot! lmbecile! Uh oh.
You wrecked the whole scene! Nitwit! l'm sorry.
l didn't know.
What is this? A coffee break? Why aren't you shooting? lt's all his fault, sir.
- Mr.
Rastapopoulos! - You! l'm really very sorry.
That's alright.
No harm done.
So, what are you doing in the middle of the desert? lt's a long story, sir.
Good! My favorite kind.
Well, what are you waiting for? Get back to work! Now you'll have to tell me all about it.
l'd be careful if l were you.
It sounds like there might be something to this curse.
Perhaps.
Well, good luck, young man! And take care in the desert.
Thanks, sir.
Goodbye! Tintin is heading towards Cairo.
See that he doesn't make it.
You're sure that anonymous tip said Tintin was disguised as an Arab? Positive.
That's him alright! Come peacefully! Or we'll resort to violence.
Run, Thomson, run! To be precise, l'm running! Feels like we've been walking forever, Snowy.
Want some, Snowy? We have to go easy on it.
Get down! Someone still wants us out of the way, Snowy.
And l don't really want to find out who.
Let's go! Oh no! Our water! Gotta keep moving.
Water! You! Why are you not in uniform? The raiders are set to attack.
Attack? Have you not heard? War has been declared! Consider yourself drafted.
Move it! Another fine mess l've gotten myself into.
Huh? The cigars! Where there's smoke, there's Bingo! Hollow? ''Send two hundred cases of cigars to Gaipajama, lndia, ''in view of next opium harvest!'' Guards! Seize this spy! Some vacation! l know l wanted to get away from it all but a firing squad at dawn! Over here! A file! Wait! Who are you? Hurry! Come on, Snowy! lt's safe to talk now.
I want to thank you Thought you'd given us the slip, did you? Shameless drug smuggler! Thompson and Thomson! Look, l'm not the smuggler.
The Colonel is.
At least, he's involved.
l was framed, detectives.
They kidnapped me and Doctor Sarcophagus.
Kidnapped? Why? We found a shipment of hollow cigars that they use to smuggle drugs.
There's a shipment on its way to lndia right now! Oh, that's not good.
To be precise, that's There he goes! Get him! He's on the roof! Quickly! Get him! Now's our chance, Snowy.
You again? Where is your uniform? Sorry, sir, but l quit.
Now, let's get out of here! Oops! Excuse me! Uh oh.
There he is! Ready! Aim! Fire! A plane! But how do l get past the guard? Help! Help! Help! Mad dog! Mad dog! Help! Stop that plane! l hope Thomson and Thompson made it.
We'll need all the help we can get if we're going to save Dr.
Sarcophagus from those smugglers.
Are you ready for it, Snowy? Look out, lndia! Here we come! It all started while Snowy and I were enjoying a well deserved vacation cruise.
Ah this is great.
The winds of paper just blown a story of a lifetime your way.
Okay, count me in.
An eccentric archaelogist, Dr Sarcophagus, invited me to search for the lost tomb of the Pharaoh Kih-Oskh.
Fame at last! What is it, Snowy? A cigar! The Pharaoh's emblem and the start of all our troubles.
Doctor? A secret entrance! There was no choice, but to enter the tomb, and hopefully find Dr Sarcophagus.
But the further Snowy and I went, the further the mystery deepened.
More cigars! Noooooo! Gas! Snowy.
Snowy! We had stumbled into a terrible trap and were almost disposed off in a most unusual way.
Move it! Coast guard! Dump the coffins! Fast! You're lucky to be alive.
Did you pick up anyone else last night, Captain? Just you and the dog.
I must get ashore fast.
My friend is in serious danger.
Tin Tin is heading towards Cairo.
See that he doesn't make it.
Get down! Some one still wants us out of the way, Snowy.
And I don't really want to find out who.
Our adventures kept taking us back to the same mystery.
The cigars! Send 200 cases of cigars to Gaipajama, India in view of next opium harvest! Guards! We had uncovered an international smuggling operation that can only be stopped where it started.
Look out India, here we come! There it is, Snowy.
The coast of lndia.
Oh no! It's broken.
We're out of gas! Okay, okay.
I'm coming.
Let's find the road to Gaipajama, Snowy.
The Pharaoh's emblem! lt's wet.
Whoever did this is still around.
Doctor Sarcophagus? l'm afraid you've made a mistake, young man.
My name isn't Sarcophagus.
l'm Pharaoh Rameses the second! Ruler of all the Nile! He's completely mad! Now, what have you done with your pants? That hurt.
Poison! Ooh! That's pretty! Here kitty, kitty, kitty! We'd better get him to a doctor before he hurts himself.
All through the horrible woods, the Pharaoh chased the reporter.
The reporter thought that was all in fun and asked for a glass of water.
Why, hello there! - Sorry to bother you - Tutankhamen! Oh no! Sorry to bother you, sir, but my friend has been hit with a poison dart.
l need to get him to a hospital.
Ah, yes, l see.
Well actually, you're in luck.
One of my guests is a man of medicine.
Oh ah, Doctor Finney! Yes? Ra! Ra! Ra! lt seems we've got a spot of bother, Doctor.
I think he's been poisoned, sir.
Bring him upstairs, l'll examine him there.
Uh, Rameses the second? Ra would like a word with you.
Oh goody! Mr.
and Mrs.
Snowball? Allow me to introduce Tintin.
Pleased to meet you.
Charmed.
Make yourself comfortable, Tin Tin.
The doctor will be down shortly.
So tell us, Major, what's the story behind this dagger? Ah, my Hindu kukri.
lt was a present from a local fakir.
He says it has magical properties.
How fascinating! Yes, quite.
The fakir claims it will point to anyone whose life is in danger.
Dr Finney, is my friend going to be alright? What did you find? The dart was tipped with Rajaijah juice, the poison of madness.
There's an asylum a few miles up the road.
You must take him there immediately.
l've written a letter to the Director with all the details.
Thank you, sir.
Doctor Sarcophagus is gone! Aaaa! My wife! Darling! Speak to me! Someone came in through the window.
The lunatic threatened me with a knife.
My kukri dagger! It's gone! l'm very sorry about this everyone.
Come on, Snowy! Let's go! Can you follow his trail in the rain, Snowy? Must kill reporter! The professor's hat! He's around here somewhere.
Oh! Phooey! Must kill reporter! Must kill reporter! My dagger! l want my dagger! Sorry Ramses, but pharaohs shouldn't try to kill their friends.
The eyes made me do it! What eyes? Those eyes! Fear not, young man.
Who are you? l am the power-rrrr.
What doyou Just watch my eyes.
My eyes! My eyes! Thanks, Snowy.
He's gone! So Doctor Finney wanted you to hand this letter to me? He told me you'd take care of everything.
l see.
Let me show you where we'll be keeping your friend.
Do you think you'll be able to cure him? Anything is possible.
A padded cell? ls he really that bad? Not him you! ''You should commit the one who hands over this letter.
''He will claim it is his friend who is insane.
" "Don't believe him.
'' You're making a mistake! Don't worry, your friend will be looked after.
Why, thank you.
Goodbye! Happy birthday! No! Breakfast.
Eat your cereal, and you'll get a cupcake for lunch.
l don't like cupcakes! Come back here! lnmate escaping! Stop him! Stop him! Stop him! Look out! There's an inmate escaping! Stop him! Not me, you fool! Jump, Snowy! I'll catch you.
Well, well! We meet again.
Thought you'd given us the slip, did you? - l got him! - Me too! - Goodness -.
.
.
gracious! Who who are you? You tell of a complicated route to Gaipajama, my friend.
But now you are here, what next? Snowy! Ah yes.
l've instructed my guards to make inquiries.
We should hear something soon.
l hope so.
Don't worry.
They'll find him.
lt's time for your afternoon studies, my son.
What is it? That music! Last time l heard it my father went mad.
Before that, it was my brother.
Does your family fight the opium trade, Maharajah? Yes, how did you know? Smugglers took over my people's poppy farms.
My family tried to force them out.
But then they went mad.
Don't make a move! You're under arrest! ln the name of the law, to be precise.
Careful Huh? He's gone! Aha! A secret doorway! You're late.
Take your seat, brother.
Our meeting is now in session.
First, l extend greetings from the boss.
Next, l'm happy to inform you that the Maharajah is no longer a concern.
Headquarters! What! Our hideout in Cairo has been raided.
Only our boss escaped.
Yes.
Yes.
l see.
Brothers, we have a spy in our midst.
Now since the rules prevent us from revealing our identities, you'll come to me one by one into the next room and tell me the password from last week's meeting.
First one! Last one! Finished! Good thing l was called first.
Well this is quite the party! The fakir, Colonel Faud, Mr.
and Mrs.
Snowball, Dr.
Finney.
Well, that certainly explains the letter.
The Maharajah's secretary.
And last, but l'll bet not least Allan! The fakir! Freeze! Right! Nobody move! Snowy! My friend, l must thank you.
lf not for that dummy you placed in my bed, l would be completely mad by now.
Glad to be of service.
Your Highness! Your Highness! Your son has been kidnapped.
Two men! They made off with him in an automobile.
Come on, Snowy! There they are! Master, we're being followed.
No! They crashed! Or did they? Look out! Missed! Get rid of him! l'll make a break with the kid! You! No! No, Snowy! Don't look at him! l surrender.
What? l surrender Well, fine.
Surrender Surrender No! Nono You are in my pow- He's got the Maharajah's son.
Stop! Diablo! Can l ever be rid of that nosy reporter! Yes just a little closer This time l can't miss.
Ah! There you are! Don't worry, I'll have you back to your father in no time.
This morning, another shipment of opium was found.
The drug ring is indeed smashed.
Great! Everything's back to normal then.
Behold! Behold your pharaoh Rameses the second! Behold! Well, almost everything.

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